Comments for Normal Eating Blog http://normaleating.com/blog Click the "Home" button to return to the main site. Wed, 01 Sep 2010 17:58:46 -0400 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 Comment on Decision to Stop Dieting: Jumping Off That Cliff by Octopus http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/hxY3w4-rafU/ Octopus Wed, 01 Sep 2010 17:58:46 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=950#comment-459 The person who introduced me to Normal Eating, a little over 2 years ago, was very uncomfortable with the idea of having no eating plan. She had been in OA for years and years. I had never been in OA or WW or any kind of structured plan, but I had been on and off pretty much every diet ever with every kind of food plan imaginable. I had never heard of intuitive eating or normal eating before she told me about NE. I joined immediately and read the book. It made complete sense to me. Why had I spent so many years listening to these outside sources? I remember trying to tell my friend that she could trust herself, but she just didn't buy it. We have since lost touch so I'm not sure what she is doing now, but I cannot imagine what I was thinking all those years I was obsessed with food and nutrition and calories and weight. It's like I was in some cult and was completely brainwashed! Actually, that is exactly what it was like. Now I am free to think about other things and do other things and not have my life revolve around what I'm putting in my mouth. It's really amazing but true that as soon as you stop obsessing about it, it ceases to matter; as soon as you stop tracking every last morsel to make sure it fits into a food plan, you are free from many of the obsessive thoughts that drive overeating in the first place. I was never uncomfortable with the idea of not having a food plan, thankfully, but if you are, just trust yourself! And ask yourself, has dieting worked? Has it made me free? Has it made me happy? If the answers are no, then maybe you should try the opposite! Now I am so out of touch with the diet/weight-obsessed mentality that when I hear something weight/diet related on the TV or read something in a magazine, or hear someone make a weight or diet-related comment, I am shocked and taken aback. Then I remember, oh yeah, that's the reality for most people. Thank god it isn't my reality anymore! Thank you, Sheryl. You've made this possible! The person who introduced me to Normal Eating, a little over 2 years ago, was very uncomfortable with the idea of having no eating plan. She had been in OA for years and years. I had never been in OA or WW or any kind of structured plan, but I had been on and off pretty much every diet ever with every kind of food plan imaginable. I had never heard of intuitive eating or normal eating before she told me about NE.

I joined immediately and read the book. It made complete sense to me. Why had I spent so many years listening to these outside sources? I remember trying to tell my friend that she could trust herself, but she just didn’t buy it. We have since lost touch so I’m not sure what she is doing now, but I cannot imagine what I was thinking all those years I was obsessed with food and nutrition and calories and weight. It’s like I was in some cult and was completely brainwashed! Actually, that is exactly what it was like. Now I am free to think about other things and do other things and not have my life revolve around what I’m putting in my mouth. It’s really amazing but true that as soon as you stop obsessing about it, it ceases to matter; as soon as you stop tracking every last morsel to make sure it fits into a food plan, you are free from many of the obsessive thoughts that drive overeating in the first place. I was never uncomfortable with the idea of not having a food plan, thankfully, but if you are, just trust yourself! And ask yourself, has dieting worked? Has it made me free? Has it made me happy? If the answers are no, then maybe you should try the opposite!

Now I am so out of touch with the diet/weight-obsessed mentality that when I hear something weight/diet related on the TV or read something in a magazine, or hear someone make a weight or diet-related comment, I am shocked and taken aback. Then I remember, oh yeah, that’s the reality for most people. Thank god it isn’t my reality anymore!

Thank you, Sheryl. You’ve made this possible!

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/08/decision-to-stop-dieting/comment-page-1/#comment-459 Comment on Decision to Stop Dieting: Jumping Off That Cliff by Ana http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/v0lwMcbFpDs/ Ana Wed, 01 Sep 2010 12:23:46 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=950#comment-458 I've started working on non-diet approaches many years ago. The taste of freedom from diets was amazing to me. I remember listening to each sign of hunger to match it with a specific food (mostly chocolate). My refrigerator was empty, because I did not want to deprive myself from eating exaclty what I wanted at any given time. I would walk many blocks (or even take the subway) to get to the exact spot where I would get the desired food. That was just the beginning of something I knew was going to take many years of work. My weight became more stable, but I would still binge and overeat. Several years later, feeling more mature and very fed up with emotional eating, I discovered NE. I was then able to start matching my eating freedom with certain responsibilities that come with it (pausing, stopping, and eventually choosing certain foods over others). I am still amazed at my normal eating self. I am amazed on how far away diets feel to me. And the spillover effect of my normality around food has been enormous, it has affected all areas of my life. I’ve started working on non-diet approaches many years ago. The taste of freedom from diets was amazing to me. I remember listening to each sign of hunger to match it with a specific food (mostly chocolate). My refrigerator was empty, because I did not want to deprive myself from eating exaclty what I wanted at any given time. I would walk many blocks (or even take the subway) to get to the exact spot where I would get the desired food. That was just the beginning of something I knew was going to take many years of work. My weight became more stable, but I would still binge and overeat.
Several years later, feeling more mature and very fed up with emotional eating, I discovered NE. I was then able to start matching my eating freedom with certain responsibilities that come with it (pausing, stopping, and eventually choosing certain foods over others). I am still amazed at my normal eating self. I am amazed on how far away diets feel to me. And the spillover effect of my normality around food has been enormous, it has affected all areas of my life.

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/08/decision-to-stop-dieting/comment-page-1/#comment-458 Comment on How to Stop Food Cravings by Sheryl Canter http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/pDmiJJ5ECM8/ Sheryl Canter Fri, 27 Aug 2010 13:02:24 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=74#comment-456 Great story, thanks for sharing it. - Sheryl Great story, thanks for sharing it.

- Sheryl

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2009/04/how-to-stop-food-cravings/comment-page-1/#comment-456 Comment on How to Stop Food Cravings by Louise http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/RopoN8XSw5I/ Louise Thu, 26 Aug 2010 16:39:21 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=74#comment-455 I texted my sister one day from work for advice - I wanted to eat but I wasn't hungry. I felt in need of comfort, but I wasn't sure what the problem was. Her response was so funny and yet so helpful that I made a list inspired by it to keep in my food journal for whenever similar feelings come up. She asked: "Is your pigtail too tight?" And, when I was done giggling at the unexpectedness of this question, I checked in with myself and found that I was cold, sitting in a draught, and that the sun was in my eyes, giving me a headache. So I closed the window, pulled the blind down just enough to keep the sun out of my eyes, and promptly made my checklist for future reference. I've found it invaluable. While it includes questions near the bottom of the list such as "Are you feeling unloved/unappreciated..." (etc), I find that sometimes the need to comfort oneself can be caused by even the simplest, most remediable discomforts. I texted my sister one day from work for advice – I wanted to eat but I wasn’t hungry. I felt in need of comfort, but I wasn’t sure what the problem was. Her response was so funny and yet so helpful that I made a list inspired by it to keep in my food journal for whenever similar feelings come up. She asked:
“Is your pigtail too tight?”
And, when I was done giggling at the unexpectedness of this question, I checked in with myself and found that I was cold, sitting in a draught, and that the sun was in my eyes, giving me a headache. So I closed the window, pulled the blind down just enough to keep the sun out of my eyes, and promptly made my checklist for future reference. I’ve found it invaluable. While it includes questions near the bottom of the list such as “Are you feeling unloved/unappreciated…” (etc), I find that sometimes the need to comfort oneself can be caused by even the simplest, most remediable discomforts.

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2009/04/how-to-stop-food-cravings/comment-page-1/#comment-455 Comment on Self-Deprivation Mindset: No Pleasure in Eating by Sheryl Canter http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/FK7h4c47SxU/ Sheryl Canter Thu, 19 Aug 2010 01:43:17 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=910#comment-454 Hi innerpilgrimage, Sorry it took me so long to respond. Your message was long and I wanted to read it carefully, but then I got sick (as I wrote about in a recent blog post). <i>> The food plans of the members I regularly interact with have food plans are closer to what you considered a reasonable simulation of "normal" (or "intuitive") eating.</i> It sounds like the OA meetings in your area are are different from those in the area I lived in when I tried it. Where I was living at the time, you could have whatever food plan you wanted - 3 meals a day, 6 meals, whatever. But whatever it was, you decided what you would eat in advance, and cleared your food with your sponsor in advance, and then if you didn't eat exactly what you'd cleared with your sponsor, it was considered a slip. This was not how I wanted to live!! I know meetings are different in different places, but many places they are like where I lived. I've talked to many others about it. There's even a LONG thread in the forum from former OA members discussing this. But it doesn't have to be like this. In theory, OA is completely compatible with a Normal Eating approach, so it would not surprise me if some meetings somewhere were NE-friendly. The ones I went to sure weren't, however. The one thing you said that I really disagreed with was this, from the second to last paragraph: <i>> Unfortunately, eating intuitively ("normal" eating) isn't an option for some people. Just like non-addicted people don't understand why OA works, we just do not understand how a person can eat normally.</i> I do not believe that some people simply cannot eat normally (and this is a terribly undermining message from OA). I think the AA analogy breaks down when applied to food - that was part of why I had problems with OA. I do think it is correct that someone addicted to alcohol or any other mood-changing drug can never use it safely - there is no possibility of "normal drinking" for an alcoholic. But I don't think this can be extended to apply to compulsive eating. There are similaries between alcoholism and compulsive eating, but they are not the same. You can abstain from drinking forever; you need food to live. That is a huge difference. Food is not an addictive substance. It is necessary to sustain life. That makes it chemically different and emotionally different. It has been my experience in working with many people over the years that even the most die-hard compulsive eater can let go of this and learn to eat normally if they are willing to do the emotional work. It's hard work and it takes commitment, but it is do-able, and the pay-off is big. <i>> Insights into normal eating are very helpful as I work toward my goal of moving from my current food plan to an intuitive eating plan.</i> You can do this, and I'm glad you are trying. You will probably find that there are emotional issues you still need to deal with for this to work. They can be suppressed with an external regimen like an OA eating plan, but when you turn to internal control, which is what Normal Eating is, you need to resolve these issues. That's what the Normal Eating stages lead you through. - Sheryl Hi innerpilgrimage,

Sorry it took me so long to respond. Your message was long and I wanted to read it carefully, but then I got sick (as I wrote about in a recent blog post).

> The food plans of the members I regularly interact with have food plans are closer to what you considered a reasonable simulation of “normal” (or “intuitive”) eating.

It sounds like the OA meetings in your area are are different from those in the area I lived in when I tried it. Where I was living at the time, you could have whatever food plan you wanted – 3 meals a day, 6 meals, whatever. But whatever it was, you decided what you would eat in advance, and cleared your food with your sponsor in advance, and then if you didn’t eat exactly what you’d cleared with your sponsor, it was considered a slip. This was not how I wanted to live!!

I know meetings are different in different places, but many places they are like where I lived. I’ve talked to many others about it. There’s even a LONG thread in the forum from former OA members discussing this. But it doesn’t have to be like this. In theory, OA is completely compatible with a Normal Eating approach, so it would not surprise me if some meetings somewhere were NE-friendly. The ones I went to sure weren’t, however.

The one thing you said that I really disagreed with was this, from the second to last paragraph:

> Unfortunately, eating intuitively (”normal” eating) isn’t an option for some people. Just like non-addicted people don’t understand why OA works, we just do not understand how a person can eat normally.

I do not believe that some people simply cannot eat normally (and this is a terribly undermining message from OA). I think the AA analogy breaks down when applied to food – that was part of why I had problems with OA. I do think it is correct that someone addicted to alcohol or any other mood-changing drug can never use it safely – there is no possibility of “normal drinking” for an alcoholic. But I don’t think this can be extended to apply to compulsive eating. There are similaries between alcoholism and compulsive eating, but they are not the same. You can abstain from drinking forever; you need food to live. That is a huge difference. Food is not an addictive substance. It is necessary to sustain life. That makes it chemically different and emotionally different.

It has been my experience in working with many people over the years that even the most die-hard compulsive eater can let go of this and learn to eat normally if they are willing to do the emotional work. It’s hard work and it takes commitment, but it is do-able, and the pay-off is big.

> Insights into normal eating are very helpful as I work toward my goal of moving from my current food plan to an intuitive eating plan.

You can do this, and I’m glad you are trying. You will probably find that there are emotional issues you still need to deal with for this to work. They can be suppressed with an external regimen like an OA eating plan, but when you turn to internal control, which is what Normal Eating is, you need to resolve these issues. That’s what the Normal Eating stages lead you through.

- Sheryl

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/06/self-deprivation-mindset-no-pleasure-in-eating/comment-page-1/#comment-454 Comment on Stopping When Full by Fruity http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/F8M5fED2zF8/ Fruity Tue, 10 Aug 2010 19:30:04 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=900#comment-453 I come from a family that gorged on food at home and at all-you-can-eat buffets. So gorging on multiple entrees, junk food, and soda were all that I knew. As a result, I developed no sense of a "normal" serving size. For people like me, overeating is a learned behavior. I eat a lot of organic fruits and vegetables now, so eating healthier products is not a problem; but I still struggle to relearn how to eat normal serving sizes because gorging has been ingrained in me for years. I'm not referring to occasional overeating during the holidays. I am talking about gorging on food every day on large quantities of junk food, soda, chips, etc. What amazed me was that other people were able to eat a NORMAL quantity of food and feel full, but I was used to eating three times the amount. I come from a family that gorged on food at home and at all-you-can-eat buffets. So gorging on multiple entrees, junk food, and soda were all that I knew. As a result, I developed no sense of a “normal” serving size. For people like me, overeating is a learned behavior. I eat a lot of organic fruits and vegetables now, so eating healthier products is not a problem; but I still struggle to relearn how to eat normal serving sizes because gorging has been ingrained in me for years. I’m not referring to occasional overeating during the holidays. I am talking about gorging on food every day on large quantities of junk food, soda, chips, etc. What amazed me was that other people were able to eat a NORMAL quantity of food and feel full, but I was used to eating three times the amount.

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/04/stopping-when-full/comment-page-1/#comment-453 Comment on Self-Deprivation Mindset: No Pleasure in Eating by Sheryl Canter http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/ehkAS-Z23Pc/ Sheryl Canter Sat, 07 Aug 2010 19:43:48 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=910#comment-452 It's great to hear the progress you're making, Linda. Thanks so much for posting! - Sheryl It’s great to hear the progress you’re making, Linda. Thanks so much for posting!

- Sheryl

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/06/self-deprivation-mindset-no-pleasure-in-eating/comment-page-1/#comment-452 Comment on Self-Deprivation Mindset: No Pleasure in Eating by Linda http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/ZGAp_cYCVhY/ Linda Sat, 07 Aug 2010 16:11:13 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=910#comment-451 Hi can relate to this so much. I'm a SAHM to two small girls (5&7) who are both in school full-time. I feel some guilt about having the whole day (really 6 hrs) of free time so in the past I would make sure I stayed constantly busy during those 6 hrs--cleaning, errands, doing laundry, taking care of things for DH. The problem is by the time I went to pick up my kids from school I was exhausted. To top it off my husband works long stressful hours as a surgeon so I was doing everything for everyone else. There was literally no time for myself. After reading Normal Eating I realized that I really need to work on my self-care. I realized the only time I allowed myself to stop doing for others was when I was eating. No wonder I wanted to eat as much as possible! So lately I've been forcing myself to do as much as I can by noon and then give myself a 2 1/2 hr break to do whatever I want. To read, be creative, even take a nap if I needed it. It's been so great, it's building my confidence, helping me to be a better mom & wife and giving me the space I need to remember who I am other than a mom & wife. Thank you for this great insight Sheryl. Hi can relate to this so much. I’m a SAHM to two small girls (5&7) who are both in school full-time. I feel some guilt about having the whole day (really 6 hrs) of free time so in the past I would make sure I stayed constantly busy during those 6 hrs–cleaning, errands, doing laundry, taking care of things for DH.

The problem is by the time I went to pick up my kids from school I was exhausted. To top it off my husband works long stressful hours as a surgeon so I was doing everything for everyone else. There was literally no time for myself. After reading Normal Eating I realized that I really need to work on my self-care. I realized the only time I allowed myself to stop doing for others was when I was eating. No wonder I wanted to eat as much as possible!

So lately I’ve been forcing myself to do as much as I can by noon and then give myself a 2 1/2 hr break to do whatever I want. To read, be creative, even take a nap if I needed it. It’s been so great, it’s building my confidence, helping me to be a better mom & wife and giving me the space I need to remember who I am other than a mom & wife.

Thank you for this great insight Sheryl.

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2010/06/self-deprivation-mindset-no-pleasure-in-eating/comment-page-1/#comment-451 Comment on Good Nutrition: Myths and Facts by Sheryl Canter http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/izAq2u6A0gA/ Sheryl Canter Thu, 05 Aug 2010 21:21:16 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=738#comment-450 <i>> pay attention to the indisputable facts (saturated fats–bad...</i> As I say in this post, I challenge the "indisputable fact" that saturated fat is bad - strongly challenge. - Sheryl > pay attention to the indisputable facts (saturated fats–bad…

As I say in this post, I challenge the “indisputable fact” that saturated fat is bad – strongly challenge.

- Sheryl

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2009/10/good-nutrition-myths-and-facts/comment-page-1/#comment-450 Comment on Eating Out of Loneliness (or Is It?) by Sheryl Canter http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NormalEatingBlogComments/~3/HaDiBwkjBd0/ Sheryl Canter Thu, 05 Aug 2010 21:13:42 +0000 http://normaleating.com/blog/?p=273#comment-449 august, joining the forum would be a good place to start. That will give you connection and support. - Sheryl august, joining the forum would be a good place to start. That will give you connection and support.

- Sheryl

]]> http://normaleating.com/blog/2009/05/eating-out-of-loneliness-or-is-it/comment-page-1/#comment-449