No time to get down because I'm movin' up [k-os]

Picking a Pediatrician

2012-01-29T09:27:00.000-08:00

I’m not sure how many parents out there actually pick a pediatrician before the baby comes, but we didn’t. To be honest, we didn’t know how to do it. We had no idea where t o start or what we would ask the doctor. We waited until the very last moment because the hospital wouldn’t discharge us until we made an appointment with one. Thankfully, a doctor at the hospital made a recommendation, so we went with that.

I called the practice and unfortunately the referred doctor was not available. The receptionist booked us with another doctor that SHE recommended. That was where we made the first mistake. I should have known. I used to work in a physical therapy office where the owner told me to book all new patients with the new PT working with the practice. I fell for that trick thinking the receptionist, whom I’ve never met, was honestly referring me to this amazing doctor who happened to be free. BIG SPOILER ALERT: We no longer book our appointments with him. Let us recap how SB and I finally found the perfect pediatrician for our precious baby… and hopefully this post will help any new parents out there…

Doctor A
Dr. A was who the receptionist recommended. He made a decent first impression. He was a nice guy. He was young, but let’s not assume anything. He could be great with kids! We asked if he had any kids. Nope. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have any experience. I’m sure his residency taught him a lot about babies… Boy, was I wrong because HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO PUT ON A DIAPER. Sure, he could use big words and knew where all the fontanels were located, but he had no clue how to actually handle a baby. That’s when we made an appointment with another doctor within the practice…

Doctor B
Dr. B was the complete opposite of Dr. A. He was old… like, ancient looking old. He slowly walked into the exam room, took a few steps, turned to us and said, “That must be Baby SB” and flashed an awkward smile. He was so old and slow (physically, not mentally,) it was scary watching him examine our baby. He stayed silent the entire time he was poking, prodding, and flipping our precious newborn around. Finally, he put down his stethoscope, calmly placed his hands on the table and told us she is perfectly healthy. We let out a sigh of relief. As we dressed Baby SB, we asked him questions and surprisingly, he was extremely helpful. With age, comes wisdom and experience. It was obvious how knowledgeable he was and his answers were honest and straight forward. None of those wishy washy answers where the doctor doesn’t want to be liable for anything he/she says.

We stayed with Dr. B until the receptionist booked us an appointment with the nurse practitioner. Oh, and one thing Dr. B did that Dr. A didn’t, HE WASHED HIS HANDS BEFORE TOUCHING OUR BABY.

Kerry, the NP
Now, I would have just asked for another appointment to stick with Dr. B, but I have a thing for NPs. I think they’re awesome. They’re like doctors except they actually know how to care for their patients.

When Kerry walked into the exam room, she was so lively and bubbly and just had SO much more energy than Dr. B. She also washed her hands as soon as she walked in. Because she was younger and more energetic, she was able to talk to us and explain what she was doing while she examined Baby SB. We talked, asked questions, and besides checking on Baby SB, she also took the time to ask ME questions, making sure I wasn’t showing symptoms of Post- Partum Depression. See what I mean when I say NPs know how to care for their patients? She shared some personal stories of her own, being a mother of two and all, like how she took her 12 day old baby to a baseball game. She also noticed how together SB and I were as she saw SB holding my hand during the visit. She said it nearly made her tear up seeing both parents here for the baby and how we much we cared for each other. Another thing that made us really connect with Kerry was that she and her husband happened to be about the same age as SB and me when they had their first baby. It was a good connection.

So, now SB and I have our picks. We’re definitely sticking to Dr. B and Kerry. If the receptionist makes an appointment for us for a new doctor, I’ll kindly ask to see either Dr. B or Kerry. We’re set with these two and I just don’t feel like seeing any more different doctors.

I know this post did not address how to go about interviewing doctors to find a pediatrician for a baby before he/she is born, but hopefully this has helped parents at least find a good health care provider when it comes to it. Watch for subtle things like does the doctor wash his hands? When he talks, does he simply say big words to prove he remembers what he learned in medical school or does he actually give you useful information? When he answers your questions, are you satisfied with his response? Do you want someone who is motherly or are you okay with the doctor as long as he knows how to handle a baby? Do you want someone who is chatty and shares personal stories or someone more professional and straight to the point? Just some things to consider so you don’t end up settling with a doctor simply because he was nice.

How Baby SB Came

2012-01-08T17:25:00.000-08:00

It started on a Thursday morning. I woke up and went about as usual: got ready, cooked breakfast, and waited for SB to come home so we could have breakfast before he drives me to work. As we ate, I told him that I have a feeling… a funny feeling that I would give birth soon. He asked how soon and I shrugged my shoulders. I had never given birth before so I had no idea how fast things would run. I did have an inkling of a clue that it could be as soon as that weekend, but I didn’t want to say and get SB all excited/worried.

Thursday continued as normal. It wasn’t until 11:30 that night that I noticed something odd. As I woke up in the middle of the night to use to bathroom, I had a bladder slip. Only, it felt a little bit heavier than my usual leak… and there was a tiny bit of color. Did my water just break?!? I never have a bladder slip while sitting up, only when I sneeze or cough. Whatever… I went back to sleep. I wake up every 2-3 hours to pee anyway and if I wake up then and the bed is soaked... well, we know what happened.

Friday morning came and the bed was dry. I guess my water didn’t break. Surely, my water breaking would be more obvious than a tiny leak. On our drive into the city, SB convinced me to call the advice nurse to make sure everything was okay. I called as we got on the bay bridge and the nurse told me to come in to make sure everything is okay. It sounded odd to her that I would lose control of my bladder being young. Also, it seems like a lot of people who work with pregnant mothers believe in mother’s intuition, so when I told her I was feeling different lately she told me to come in for a check up.

Long story short, my water did break. My water broke high up, so only a little bit of fluid was trickling down. And those mild menstrual cramps I was feeling? Yeah, they’re called CONTRACTIONS. FYI for anyone about to experience your first pregnancy. Why don’t they tell you that in the books? The whole time I was waiting for a different feeling but those cramps were the go ahead signal to send my ass to the hospital.

At the hospital, I got completely drugged up and the baby popped out just after midnight. Anyone who goes through a natural birth with no drugs, hats off to you. When the contractions kicked in at full speed, I was begging for pain killers. I had to be given a drug just to calm me down enough to get the epidural. The joy that followed the pain:

Happy New Year, folks! No better way to enter the new year than getting paid to stay home with my loved ones :)

Is being a big sis like being a mom?

2011-06-09T18:17:00.000-07:00

My brother and I have an agreement. No friends over until (1) he finds our family's missing digital camera (which was either lost because my mom's memory sucks or stolen by one of his friends) or (2) he gets a job (because he's 21 and has no sense of responsibility.) I don't think it's that much of a deal. He has three ways to get out of it: (1) He can ask his friends about the camera and retrieve it -- if it was stolen (2) Help unpack at the new house and find the missing camera or (3) Go find a part time job.

He failed to do anything and I caught him having friends over our house. Now, what am I suppose to do with him? He broke the rules of our agreement. How in the world am I suppose to get this kid to learn anything?

I figured he is an adult now. And, adults pay rent. So, I told him every day that he has friends over, it will cost him $50. His friends obviously felt the tension and decided they wanted to go home. So, my brother drove them home. In my mom's car. Again, lack of responsibility. I'm sure he doesn't pay for gas and here he is chauffeuring his friends around without a slight hesitation that he is abusing what has been given to him.

Although I know what I'm doing is needed and fair, I have this sick feeling in my gut. No, not from the baby, but from feeling bad about my brother. I know he doesn't have $50 to pay me. I know he's leaving next month to join the Army. But dammit he needs to learn he can't just run away from responsibilities. I know one of the reasons he's going to the Army is because he doesn't want to finish his AA. (No diss what so ever for anyone wanting to join the force or is serving our country. It is a very admirable thing to do, but I know my brother's decision to join was half baked and a cop out.)

Given that money is always tight with our family, I decided to alter the punishment. He's still out driving his friends so I have yet to tell him what I plan on offering him. He has to do chores until he leaves for the Army. That doesn't sound much of a punishment because really, at this age you should be able to do chores without being told to. From now on, he will be responsible for doing ALL of the dishes. This is a big thing because I'm starting to cook now and my little sister is on summer vacation and she loves to bake. If I have to tell him to do the dishes, I will add on extra chores; he should know to do them automatically. If he doesn't do them, that's when I start taking his things. First thing I plan on taking is his computer mouse. He LOVES computer games. And you can bet without his mouse, he won't be playing any of those fancy online shooter/war games.

Now I feel better about the situation, but I did change my original plan of punishment. I am soft. How am I going to handle being a mom? I look forward to all the fun things moms do with their kids, but the ugly stuff? Not so sure how I'll handle it. I guess that's why I have SB there. But I have to be strong for my kid. Otherwise s/he will turn out to be a pushover. And I definitely don't want my kid bullied around.

So, baby, please don't be too mad when I do something that seems unfair to you. Just know I'm doing it for a good reason. Love you lots and can't wait to bring you into this world.

Update: The bro tried to be smart and tried to reason with me that he should just pay mom the money... yeah right like mom would take money from him. So I never gave him the chores option and he paid me the rent.

Anybody still there?

2011-05-25T20:16:00.000-07:00

Because I have BIG news to share. I've told many of my family and friends so I think it's okay for me to finally announce this on the internetz...

Lately, Kuya Boss has been worried about me. I took the last three Mondays off. I took the last two off because I went to the doctor's. Then I took Tuesday afternoon off to again go see the doctor. You can imagine why he's concerned. Am I really going to the doctor's or am I just lying to him? If I really am going to the doctor's so often, then what's wrong with me? I finally got a hold of him in private to show him this picture:

Pretty cool, huh?!?!? You can see the head!!!

Yeah, SB and I are pretty stoked. It was unplanned of course. And although our parents are scared shitless for us, we see this as a blessing and can't be any happier. It's like we're on e. Like all the time. Except I get nausea and fatigued very easily. Just kidding.

So now the blog is taking a turn. It's going from chronicling my college years to how I'd get into medical school to documenting my pregnancy. I imagine the pregnancy's going to take over my life and it's probably the only thing I have that's interesting enough to share. Most of my social life revolves around SB and I'm sure all you would get sick to hear about our mushy love life. Also, I want to make sure I remember as much of this as possible and share this other young ladies going through unplanned pregnancies.

Many updates to come. I can't wait.

The Honeymoon Phase

2011-04-30T14:14:00.001-07:00

SB and I have been together for nearly a year and five months now. We're in love as much as when it first started.

I was going to use this post to rant a bit about how bitter I think my friends are about love and relationships, but I realized, why waste my time on their negativity? Basically, I asked them about the honeymoon phase of a relationship. I wanted to know how long it usually lasts and to hear about their experiences and get some advice. You know... have girl talk and share stories. But the conversation lasted about 7 seconds. The end.

Luckily, I’ve made new friends. My favorite barista from work saw SB and me kiss and called us cute. She asked how long we’ve been together. I told her almost a year and 5 months now. She smiled and said congratulations. She seems pretty open about things and I’ve seen her husband around before. I asked her about her relationship and about the honeymoon phase. She said it never ends. She and her husband have been together 10 years now and their friends get mad whenever they get drunk and start making out in public (or even when they’re sober, actually.) She gave us little tips, basically to not pick fights over small things because it’s those little things that add up and eventually ruin it. Then I remembered last year. She jokingly recommended doing some role playing when I told her about my birthday trip to Las Vegas. She said we should pretend to be strangers and meet up at a bar. I thought she was a freak, but realized she’s just good at keeping the flame and interest factor high in a relationship. There’s a reason why she’s my favorite.

I have a new colleague at work who I gotten to know better. At dinner last night, I decided to ask her how she and her husband met. The table was too crazy to get the entire story and ask her about her honeymoon phase, but I didn’t need a long explanation. After dinner, the lot of us walked over to an ice cream shop. Half of the group decided they’d rather do more drinking so left and told us to meet them at a bar down the street after we got dessert. There was me, my female colleague, her husband, and the rest of men from our dinner. I stood around the men and talked while we had ice cream. The one couple stood off on their own... standing close to each other... eating ice cream out of the same cup... talking about who knows what, but DAMN did they look so in love. They had known each other for 6 years and the flame looked as bright as ever.

To be honest, I know the answer to the honeymoon phase question. It depends on the couple, but I've been surrounded by such negativity when it comes to my high school friends and talking about relationships. I wanted some reassurance that things aren't as complicated as they make it out to be and I'm so glad to have had witnessed what I did with the barista and my colleague at the ice cream shop.

So one year and five months with SB have gone by and now I can't wait to see what the future holds for us. I don't know how long our relationship will last, especially with the possibility of me going to medical school (interview in Arizona next week!) and how that will change me. College changed me drastically and I have no idea how medical school would shape me and whether or not SB and I will make it through together. But with the rate of how things are going, it looks promising and seeing how others have made it too, I hope the barista is right and that this honeymoon phase never ends.

Is it my turn yet?

2011-03-25T14:48:00.000-07:00

From the moment I moved back home, I've been trying to get into medical school. I started studying for the MCAT, I took practice exams, I worked on my personal statement, I wrote letters to professors, doctors, schools, I wrote essays for secondaries... I worked really hard to get here (hence the lack of updates on the blog.)

A colleague of mine who applied to graduate school recently heard back from his top pick. He's in! When I saw him holding a sweater with that school's logo, I looked at him funny... His eyes lit up, "I didn't tell you yet?" Right then I knew he had gotten in and immediately grabbed his hands and started jumping up and down (he's gay by the way and jumped up and down with me.) I was so proud of him.

A friend who is applying to medical school this year with me was having a hard time. I told her it's still not too late to apply to some schools and before you know it, she was granted an interview at one of the schools I had been to. I gave her all the information I could remember from my interview. I gave her details, lots of them. A few weeks later, I get a text. She's in! She deserves it and I am so happy for her.

Another friend of mine just texted me today telling me he has been offered an interview at the school that I am wait listed for. Of course, I couldn't hold out on him and sent him a lengthy email on my personal experience and any advice I could give him. I wish the best for him, but as I watch all of my friends go on to the next chapter of their lives, I'm left here wondering, what about me?

I shouldn't be complaining because the best way for all of this to work out is for me to actually NOT get accepted anywhere this year. You see, because I am wait listed at this school, if I don't get in anywhere this year, they will consider me for early acceptance for the next year. I want the early acceptance for next year. That way, I'll have more time to work, save up money, I'll get to go to the Philippines with SB in November, I get to spend more time with the family... It sounds much more relaxing than getting in last minute and what if all the financial aid is already gone?

But really, I want to keep waiting? I've been waiting for months now and it sucks. What if they decide to NOT let me in next year?!? It's not a sure thing. The wait list/early acceptance plan sounds great and highly possible, but it also sounds just too good to be true. Please let it be true.

My, time has flown!

2011-03-20T15:49:00.000-07:00

I'm always telling SB, “Wow, it’s been a while since we’ve last…” Gone out, gone on a vacation, went dancing, got drunk…. Only to realize, it’s only been two weeks since the last said occasion. I obviously have a really bad perception of time.

However, the other weekend we did a first: our first grown up house dinner party. A colleague of mine, whose husband finally had a Saturday night off, invited us over for dinner. (Why you would invite everyone you know over the first free Saturday night your husband has off is beyond me. I would have asked for a whole lot of “me” time instead.) Practically half of the lab showed up. Well only half of the lab was invited because it was a small apartment. She claimed it was small. It was pretty effin’ nice and roomy for a San Francisco apartment if you ask me. But, she did have one valid point for not inviting some people: it definitely is not a suitable place for children to run around.

So there we were… sippin’ on some beer and wine, eating fondue, bruschetta, and mingling with the most diverse group of people I’ve ever a Saturday night with. It was great. It was a totally different scene for us because usually kids my age spend their Saturdays drunk at a bar or grinding on someone at the club. I felt very mature and cultured that night.

I’ve been wanting SB to meet one of my colleague’s significant other. They’re both into physics and when the two hit it off in a conversation, it was quite a turn on to watch my man engage in an intellectual conversation with someone who has a Ph.D. in physics. From Oxford. (Actually the truth is, I’m not 100% sure where he got his Ph.D. BUT, I do know the couple has ties to that university, so for the point I’m trying to make, let’s say he’s an Oxford educated man and SB was practically on his level.)

Dinner itself was tasty. It was a play-off of paella. Dessert was a sweet and creamy crème brulée topped with fresh berries. Someone also brought a thick chocolate cake and a bottle of muscat. (Are you drooling yet?)We wanted to stay late and drive a couple of our colleagues home, but SB only had a few hours of sleep that morning. We left relatively early around midnight and promptly fell asleep as soon as we went to bed. We had a great evening and the best part of it all… no hang over the next morning.

Git in ma bellllaaayyy!

2011-02-08T17:24:00.000-08:00

The past couple of weeks, I was taken over by my inner fat kid. I don't know if I've ever told you guys this, but I CAN EAT. Or at least I used to be able to eat a lot. I've become very self conscious of myself so I'm finally learning the importance of portion control, but don't be fooled; I still love food. I just eat less of the junk and more stuff that's better for me.

The latter half of January was Dine About Town in San Francisco. While I was down in LA for college, I always missed out on Dine LA week, so when I found out about San Francisco's version, I immediately told SB we're eating at (at least) one of the fancy restaurants.

I also told my colleague we should go out for lunch and try one of the participating restaurants. We made a reservation for a three course lunch and a small pack of us made it out to the nearby restaurant where I feasted on a yummy beet salad with goat cheese (I love cheese), their famous sweet and savory ribs with meat practically falling off the bone, and some creamy chocolate gelato. And it was just the beginning because that weekend, I made reservations for lunch on Saturday and dinner on Sunday.

Lunch was a bit disappointing so let's just forget about that. The churro was the highlight of the meal, but probably only because I have such a deprived sweet tooth since I cut back on pastries. I miss you, cookies...

Dinner was great. We ate at a French restaurant. I regret not taking any pictures of the food that night, but every thing was on point: the crab salad, the shrimp, the iron flat steak, the scallops, the semi-freddo, and of course, more gelato. Just in case you guys were wondering, yes I ate the semi-freddo and finished SB's gelato. I told you I can eat! He also shared all of his food with me. For some reason whenever I offer him what's on my plate he always declines. Whatever, more for me...

After the weekend of dining out, we flew down to LA where I made reservations for Dine LA week. YEEESSS! Finally! I get to experience Dine LA and you'd think by now I was done with expensive fancy three course meals. Hells no. I quickly made a reservation for LA Market, where the winner from the past season of Hell's Kitchen now works as the head chef. My little sister, who wants to go to culinary school and watched Hell's Kitchen with me, became very jealous. The apps and desserts got demolished and all I could take a picture of was this:

By the way, I had to angle to dish because I started digging in before remembering to take a picture. I only wanted to take a picture so I have something to show my little sister.

I also got to meet the head chef, Nona. I was completely star struck.

It was ridiculous how shy and quiet I got. SB had to speak up and say to the chef, "Oh, she's been wanting to ask you a question..." I had a blank look on my face because I couldn't remember what I wanted to ask her. My mind was too busy racing and thinking and trying to act cool so again, he spoke up and asked her about the tattoos on her arms. We had a quick chat and she had to run back to the kitchen.

After dinner, I called my little sister to tell her about my dining experience at LA Market. She gave me the whole "Whatever..." attitude, trying to act cool and like as if she doesn't care. I know she was jealous to the tenth power. At least.

It's been a fantastic affair with food for the past couple of weeks and it's time I ended it. I think I've gained 10 pounds from eating out so much. Time to get reacquainted with my running shoes.

What's up for 2011

2010-12-31T15:26:00.000-08:00

** I started this post in December and am finally finishing it up now

I'm already out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how to get started; it's all uncharted...

I remember being SO excited for 2010. This was the year I took the MCAT for the first time, started applying to medical schools, met an awesome guy at the bar, and landed a salary paying job WITH BENEFITS... I was starting my career and my adult life.

Now, I sit here as the year is coming to a close and I feel no sense of accomplishment. I feel more lost than ever with what I'm doing with my life. I sit here still with no acceptance to any schools, not enough money to finally move out of my mom's house, no idea what the next step is besides waiting. Wait for someone to accept me into medical school. Wait to save enough money to gain back my independence. Wait to figure out what being 20-something in a time like this is suppose to be like. Am I suppose to have my career started by now? Am I suppose to have a family before I enter my 30s? Will my eggs "go bad" by then? What am I suppose to be doing with my life? What's my next goal?

I have no fcukin' clue.

And surprisingly, I'm okay with it all. It's just so different. For the first time, I have no idea what the new year will bring. I don't know what's the next step. When I was a kid, the next thing was always to survive the next grade level. After high school, it was college. After college, it was to find a job. And now a year and a half after graduation... what's next? ::shurgs... completely lost look on face::

I'll try to come back with a more uplifting story. Not that I'm depressed, I'm just flowing through life right now. I do have some big plans. There's an LA trip planned for next month. SB and I are going to visit our homelands this summer (Philippines and Vietnam. My FIRST time traveling outside of the country!) Life is good. I guess the next thing in my life is learning how to just live and stop stressing about having some goal or constantly trying to achieve something.

Amusez-vous bien!

Things are going... just flowing along...

2010-11-28T12:56:00.000-08:00

If you follow me on twitter, you know that I received my rejection letter from Pomona this week. Sad, yes, but it's okay. I interviewed at another school last week and they should be getting back to me soon. That interview didn't go great, but there's still a chance I could get in. Also, I'm on hold for an interview for a school in Arizona. I sent in an appeal letter and three new letters of rec, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for ONE more chance to interview. Hopefully, third one's a charm ;)

I'm reaching the point where I don't know what I want to do anymore. I thought these interviews were suppose to solidify my choice of going into medicine, but instead it's just left me feeling... eh. But here's the thing: I don't know if I'm feeling this way because I have some kind of defense mechanism in me activated and I'm not willing to face the fact that I'm just not cut out for medicine. Like a form of denial... Or maybe I'm giving up, but just don't want to face it and feel like a failure.

There is a glimmer of hope; I haven't been rejected from all the schools yet. I'm good enough to not be rejected right off the bat, but my app isn't impressive enough to be granted an interview right away. I've emailed a bunch of schools asking for an update and all of them who have replied said that my file is still under review. I think they're waiting to see the whole pool of applicants before they reach a final decision for me, so until then all I can do is wait. And waiting sucks. And feels like lost hope. Delusional, almost...f*ck.

Okay, okay... It's the holiday season and let's not end the year feeling down in the dumps now. I finally paid my credit card off in full! I can probably pay off the rest of my student loans in the next couple of months! Everything at the Banana Republic Outlet was 50% off! My boyfriend is coming back from his homeland! I have $260 worth of credit with Virgin America! Trip to LA? Trip to FL? Let's not forget my colleague's wedding next month! Lots to feel good about.

A colleague introduced me to Mayer Hawthorne... a white boy who sings Motown! This is so far my favorite song from the man:

This song never fails to cheer me up so I hope you all enjoyed it. Happy holidays every body!

It's just not for me.

2010-11-11T15:06:00.000-08:00

Travelling for work sounds like a glamorous thing. Not everyone gets to do it. Only the privileged. It can take you places you’d never think of visiting. Like Upton, New York on Long Island. It’s not bad here, but it certainly is no New York City.

My work takes me here twice a year. I get to stay at a former military base, meet new people, and watch cable TV (I don’t have cable TV at home.) The first time I came to the east coast for work, I spent two weeks here and lost nearly 15 pounds of weight due to the lack of food available on site. The only reason why I enjoyed myself was because SB flew across the country to hang out with me and we ended up going to a Janelle Monae concert in NYC. We also met up with an old friend of his and went shopping. The work itself was complicated as I pricked myself with a contaminated needle, extreme time points in the middle of the night, and the beam was malfunctioning. But overall, a pleasant trip thanks to SB.

This trip was supposed to be a short one. I was supposed to fly in, zap the mice, make sure everything is ok, and fly back home. That is not happening. There was a fire in the control room. After that, another part of the beam started leaking fluids. I’ve had to cancel two flights, and after that I’m still not sure when I’ll be able to fly home. I changed my flight to the latest time Virgin America is leaving JFK on Friday so at least I would be flying home in comfortable white chairs with purples lights and an entertainment screen. I’m crossing my fingers that I everything goes according to plan and I don’t have to cancel another flight.

I can handle those setbacks. I’m really bothered about everything because it’s SB’s birthday on Saturday. I don’t know if you guys remember, but he took me to Vegas for my birthday and I have nothing planned for his birthday. There’s a boxing fight that night, so he might want to stay in and rest before he flies off for his annual trip to his homeland. I don’t know yet. I just know he’s the first person I want to see/hug/kiss when I get home.

I am so scared that I will turn into one of those people who put work in front of everything, before family, friends, and what really matters in life. As much fun as travelling for works sounds, it’s just not for me. I’d want a stable job where I can settle down and start a family. I don’t want to be travelling the world for work as someone else watches over my kids. If I travel, I want it to be for pleasure and to spend it with my loved ones.

And just in case you were wondering, yes I cried when I talked to SB for the first time on the phone when I realized I had to cancel my original flight home. And then I cried again after I got off the phone with him when he told me how his best friend bought him dinner for his birthday and how he’s out shopping with his family.

Quick rant, then it's back to work.

2010-09-19T20:06:00.000-07:00

Lion: R U still at home?

p-huong: Yup. Still working on apps.

Lion: Jesus!

Sorry for the lack of updates, folks. I've been fairly busy at work (you know, lazy project manager, lazy technicians, supervisors covering for their own behinds.)And of course, applications. I applied to 30 different medical schools, a good mix of allopathic and osteopathic schools. For those who are not familiar with the process, I have to submit a common primary application that gets sent out to all the schools and then the individual schools invite me to fill out a secondary application (that is if they like me or if they just want to take more money from me.) After the secondary application, if the schools are still interested in me, I'll get invited for interviews. The application process itself will take a year... primaries open in June... secondaries get sent out late summer/early fall.... interviews start in the fall and continue through spring of next year. It's nothing like applying to undergraduate programs.

So that's why I get SO unbelievably annoyed when I get comments like that from my best friend. Yes, O. M. EFFIN' G. I am still working on applications. I am still waiting to hear back from schools. I am still waiting (and praying) for interview invites. It's a lot of hard work and needs a lot of attention. I just can't write bull shit essays. Sure I can reuse parts of essays, but do you realize how many essays the adcoms read? I need to stand out. I need to put my best pen to the paper and write my ass off. I have to get creative and not bore my readers. I need SUPPORT FROM MY OWN FAMILY AND FRIENDS. Instead of texting "Jesus!", how about a "good luck." Or better yet, include a smiley face to make me feel better because really, that's all it takes to make me feel better.

Hope everyone had an amazing weekend :)

Vegas: Take III

2010-07-18T18:45:00.000-07:00

We had lots planned for the couple of days that we'd be spending in Vegas together. I wanted to lounge around the pool and eat at Serendipity's. SB wanted to do some cheesy couple stuff like go on the Venetian boat ride and take a ride to the top of the Eiffel Tower. He also wanted to eat at a buffet, watch an NBA summer league game, and of course, go clubbing. Out of that entire list, we did only two things: eat at two buffets and went to a few clubs. We didn't have that romantic boat ride. I didn't get to see Vegas from the top of the Eiffel Tower. We saw a couple of basketball players walk around the casinos, but never made it out to the arena to actually watch them play and despite the 100+ degree temperature, we didn't come within 50 feet of a swimming pool or sip a frozen hot chocolate.

The trip may sound like a failure, but I actually had a lot of fun.

- We got heavily intoxicated. I even blacked out one night. On another night, SB was so drunk, I had to drive us back to the hotel, which was very interesting in itself. He tried to seduce me while I was driving in which I responded by yelling at him, but then started laughing because he had this ridiculous I'm-so-drunk smile on his face.

- We danced the night away. I'm so glad I'm with someone who actually likes to go clubbing and dance.

- We took some pictures. As a couple, we suck at taking pictures. We usually forget to bring a camera along or if we do, we always forget to take pictures. This time we made an extra effort so that we could have some photographs to remember our first get-away to a city where we both don't know anybody. I was stupid and I let him take the pictures and most of them came out blurry because his hands weren't very stable and I didn't want my perfectionist side to come out and take the camera away from him.

- We went shopping. It's also nice being with a guy who doesn't mind shopping.

- We ate a lot of food. TWO buffets. Enough said.

And that's how turning 23 started to look good, not to mention our first night back in California was just as fun. Hope everybody had an amazing weekend!

First night back from Vegas. Bootie.

Lots of Good Things

2010-07-11T21:16:00.000-07:00

Much has happened within the last month, but I didn't feel like writing about one specific event so I guess I'll just give one big update. I have been writing, but all the posts are half finished and didn't seem worthy to be finished or published. That or I'm just heavily paranoid that med school committees are going to Google my name and find this blog so I'm too scared to write about specific details about the application process (I'm scared they'll find a post and take it as how I really wanted to answer those secondary questions.) Usually when you Google my name, you get my LinkedIn page and my Facebook profile. All the other hits are from other people with my Vietnamese name. There's even a psychiatrist in San Jose with my exact name!

A while ago I wrote about moving up to San Francisco. I think it's time to admit that I'll never move up to the city. The cost just isn't worth it, especially with this new living arrangement I have; I sleep over SB's for half the week. It's really nice because I get to spend more time with him, I get to sleep in, and I get to avoid that hour train ride home. Win. Win. And win.

Things with SB have been going very well. I even got his best friend's approval! SB told him about my b-ball skillz and he basically said I was a keeper because I ride a motorcycle, watch college football, and have a pretty good jumper. BANK.

I've made some changes to my lifestyle. I cut out bagels and beer from my diet in addition to cutting back on pastries. I'd cut out baked goods completely from my diet, but my baby sister is always baking. I never stay past 5:30 at work, so now I get home in time to fit in a run around my neighborhood. I believe I said this before in a very old post: I want to be a hip grandma surfing with her grand kids, so I'm trying to take better care of my body. That and I don't want to be like my mom when I get to her age. It scares me to think that I got half of my genes from her. Don't get me wrong. I love my momma. I just don't want to be exactly like her.

I finally took Francesca to the shop. I got an oil change for her, a safety check, and a new headlight bulb. She runs much better now. I also took her on the freeway for the first time! It was scary and exciting at the same time. I was so tense. I felt that if I loosened any muscle, the wind would have knocked the bike over. It is possible to take a 250 on the freeway, but I admit I'd feel much safer with a bigger bike. When I wear down Francesca, I'll probably buy my next bike straight from the dealer. No more hand me downs.

Okay, now I feel like I've wasted your time because let's face it... my life is getting lame. I've got a good flow going in life. Good things are happening, just nothing too exciting. Oh wait, did I mention that SB is taking me to Vegas for my birthday? And to make this post better, I've decided to share a picture. This is me way back in the day. My head isn't so square shaped anymore.

Sisters are awesome.

2010-06-20T13:11:00.001-07:00

Mom: Chi hai (That's me. It's the Vietnamese name given to the eldest daughter.) Do you know where the receipt is from yesterday?"

My mom bought over a hundred dollars worth of noodles and needs it for reimbursement. She gave me the change for gas, so I checked my bag. Not there. I checked my wallet.... and noticed my credit card is missing. FFFUUUUUUCCCKKKKK.

I grab the car keys and decide to check in the car. I remember the last thing I did with it was try to pay for gas. I pulled up to the gas station, grabbed my credit card and decided to use the cash my mom had given me earlier. Okay, what did I do to the card when I decided to pay with cash instead? Did I toss it back in the car? Did I leave it ON the car? Did I accidentally leave it with the cashier? FUCK, IT'S NOT IN THE CAR. (And neither is the receipt.)

I go back into the house.

Me: "Diane, what was the last thing we did yesterday? It was buy gas right? Do you remember what I did with my credit card?"

D: "You decided to use cash instead."

Me: "I know, but what did I do with the card? I tossed it back into the car right?"

D: "No."

Me: "Are you sure? Did I have the card in my hand?"

D: "I don't remember."

I double, triple check my bag, my wallet, my jacket....

D: "Check your pants."

I grab my khakis on the floor with the belt still on it. It's not there. I am so fucked. San Jose is littered with Vietnamese people. The chances of a Vietnamese female picking it up and getting away with a crazy shopping spree is very likely because I have such a typical Vietnamese name and no one would know it was stolen unless a responsible cashier were to ask to see ID and you know rarely anyone does that anymore. I go back to my desk and continue looking. Then I go back to my pants.

D: "Weren't you wearing jeans yesterday?"

Oh, shit. Yes. I was. I check the dirty hamper and lo and behold, my beautiful green credit card. Damn I love my baby sister. You know my brother would have not been able nor care to remember what kind of pants I was wearing the day before.

This is my favorite photo of her. She's now bigger than me.

So close...

2010-04-18T21:57:00.000-07:00

I was thisclose to finding an apartment with SB in San Francisco. However, the stars were not aligned and everything fell apart within about 48 hours of us just talking about moving in together.

SB's family owns a couple of homes throughout the Bay Area and to cut things short, he was suppose to move out of one house because they've decided to sell it. He had plans to find his own apartment and then eventually buy his own house. I have been wanting to move up to the city, but the ordeal of finding a place and roommates to live with is a headache that I can't deal with right now. When I heard how soon he would be moving out of his current house, I decided to tell him that I was thinking about moving up to the city after the MCAT retake. That led to the idea of us living together and before you knew it, we were looking up places online and I was making appointments to see places.

Then I get a phone call. Again, to cut things short, they might not have to sell the house and just like that, everything went down the drain.

Maybe I shouldn't have used that expression because it makes it sound as though this is a bad thing. It isn't entirely bad news. It's good news because now the family has less to handle and I no longer have to deal with the stress of moving. I'm still stuck here in San Jose, but I can bear it out. I still have to tell all the friends whom I informed about the move that I won't be moving up to the city anymore.

Being the optimist that I am (sometimes I wonder if all this optimism just means I'm fucking delusional) I noticed one extremely good thing that came from this situation: communication between SB and me. When the idea of us moving in together first came up, I was scared to ask about it and SB felt like we were moving too fast. However, given how things could have easily worked out, we thought this would be a good decision. As I was looking for places, I started wondering about the commute within the city, how much of my paycheck would go to the apartment, how much will I be able to save up every month (applications for medical school are already pricey. I can't imagine how much I would have to spend on top of that if I get any interview offers and still need to pay back my student loans,) etc. SB, however, surprisingly grew excited about the idea. He thought about how nice it would be to live in the city, to find an apartment with a gym/basketball court, all the parties he could throw, how my LA friends would have a place to stay if they came up to visit us (a friend will be visiting in May and he thought specifically of her,) etc. He told me all of this over the phone when he had to break it to me that we might not be moving in together. Things still need to be cleared up, but there was talk in his family about the house being okay and they won't have to sell it. We had a really good talk on the phone.

Before this, anytime we would have a conversation about something serious, I would be drunk. It was the only way I could get the balls to bring up the subject. Like when we officially became boyfriend/girlfriend. In the beginning, he moved a lot faster than I expected. He wanted the official title of being a couple before I could figure out if I really liked him or the free dinners and rides home from work. When I finally realized that I was crazy about the guy, I knew I had to be the one to bring the subject back up and I was drunk the night I did it... and I said a bunch of embarrassing things. Lets just say the ride home from the restaurant was a memorable one and he still quotes me every now and then just to tease me.

So that's that. I'm still stuck here in San Jose aka High School Drama-ville.

Sniffing Isofluorane, needle pricks, and complimenting EMTs

2010-04-06T19:34:00.000-07:00

Monday was HECK-TIK!

To give a quick summary of my work day, I had two different irradiation experiments and one of which had to be followed up with time point collections at 4 and 12 hours post exposure. I know that has no real meaning to anyone who doesn't know my work, but I don't want to get in trouble with revealing too much. Just know it was a lot of work because think about it: if I irradiate my specimen around noon, 4 hours later is in the middle of the afternoon and 12 hours later is in the middle of the night. Late night timed collections after running around an ex-military base is exhausting and the amount of prepping required is immense. The guy in charge yelled at us, "This is a $XXXX beam and you're just going to let it lag?!?" Well, I believe that was during my collaborators' run, not mine (I hope. Ha.)

So the 4-hour time point didn't go well. What should have taken us about 30 mins ended taking longer than an hour. I freaked out, like PMS level freak out, over-react, on the verge of tears kind of freak out. (The importance of the 30 mins time frame is because the protein expression of the specimen can change and that would skew the data.)

After the freak out, I decided to practice on the control specimen to see what can be done to cut back on the time. This was around 9 pm. Around 10 pm I had another freak out moment: I pricked myself with a contaminated needle.

I ended up calling the emergency extension. The ambulance and cops came. They checked my heart rate, blood pressure, filled out some paper work... I was fine, but it was my first time hurting myself on the job. On top of that, I had all this pent up frustration with colleagues back home and stress that accumulated to this explosive day. I ended up over-working myself and nearly put myself in a dangerous situation. Let's face it, no matter how expensive this project is, it is not more valuable than my life and well-being. Important lesson in the science/reseatch field learned.

Now imagine this: the following day some news surfaced that basically meant the more important project is wasted. You know what was my reaction? Nothing. Well, not exactly nothing. I emailed my superiors back on the west coast to fill them in just in case the bosses in charge of both teams had not discussed the issue. I was a bit worried, but nothing can be done to fix what happened. My run had already been completed; I can't redo it. I just hope all this hard work wasn't for nothing.

Now I feel like I owe you readers an explanation of the title. "Sniffing isofluorane" -- Isofluorane is an anesthetic and I was stupid enough to sniff it. I thought there was something funny going on with the isoflo machine. "Needle prick" -- See above paragraphs. "Complimenting EMTs"-- the EMTs saw my arm tattoo while taking my blood pressure and caught a glimpse of some of my other body art. As I left, they gave me a compliment. Yeah, I saved the best for last.

"TSA, m0th3r f4ck2r!"

2010-03-31T19:44:00.000-07:00

That is probably my favorite line from the movie "She's Out of My League."

So it's on. I'm on my first business trip. Is that what science people call it too? "Business trip" sounds like I'll be in meetings all day, but you get the idea. I'm flying out for work. Excited? I guess. I WAS excited. Like a bunch of uncivilized ass hats, my tribe has decided to send me to Long Island for two weeks on what has got to be the most unorganized trip ever. It was hectic 'til the moment I got picked up by the shuttle. (Yeah, I'm in a shit load of trouble if someone from work finds this blog. I don't think they'll appreciate my sense of humor.)

Okay, so no more shit talking just in case I get in trouble. You just have to understand that I am travelling alone and I probably make the least amount of money out of everyone in the lab, so if these last minute expenses don't get reimbursed, I will be very pissy and a pissy tech is bad news for everybody's projects. Comprenez? D'accord.

The entire day wasn't a complete downer (besides from the whole... ha. Just kidding. No shit talking.) The ladies working the ticket counter were ADORABLE. And you know who was even more adorable than those ladies? One of the ladies' five month old daughter. The husband brought the baby to the airport to visit mommy. I spent a moment chatting with the adults, made a little face to the baby, and waved good bye. I walked away with a smile on my face and all the stress that had accumulated earlier today faded away. Ahhh... The magic of babies and people who actually do... Sorry, no shit talking.

Plenty of updates to come the next two weeks. I will be blogging on my phone, but hopefully there's some kind of computer/internet access on campus. Salut!

The Adventures of P-Huong and Francesca

2010-03-20T21:17:00.000-07:00

Okay these aren't so much as adventures as they are just running errands.

I know I've had the bike for a while now so I should already be hitting the open road and planning a cross country road trip, but I don't have much time to ride. It takes me nearly 2 hours to get to work. I wake up before the sun is up and I get home as the sun is setting. It's quite depressing. I leave my building with the hopes of getting home and riding the bike, only to be fooled because it is setting by the time I enter the train station in San Jose. On the weekends, I'm stuck studying (or more like procrastinating) for round 2 with the MCAT (hence the lack of updates. Sorry. The only interesting stories I have are work related and I don't want PETA on my ass. Also, I don't want you readers, if there are any of you left, to barf all over your keyboard/laptops/mobile phones from all of my lovey dovey updates about SB. I truly care about you all.)

Earlier this week, I rode Francesca to the doctor's office. It was my first time riding over 30 mph. I have a huge fear of running over the neighborhood kids, so I stay within the speed limit whenever I'm out practicing. You can imagine all the cars passing me up, but hey you try going 40 mph in your car without the frame!

The trip was a success:
- I'm more comfortable switching gears. Working the clutch no longer makes my forearm sore. I have weak arms. When I jump rope, my arms get tired before my legs do.

- I'm better with remembering to turn off my turn signals. The signals don't turn off automatically like in a car. Before, I used to look down to make sure I was hitting the right button, but now I don't need to look. I know. Pro.

- I didn't stall. The VERY first time I took the bike out, I rode it to a friend's house and I stalled at a busy intersection near a freeway exit. Yeah, that sucked. Thank goodness for being a girl.

- Francesca didn't get stolen. I haven't bought any locks for the bike yet. The thing about having a small bike is how easily thieves can load it into a van or onto a truck.

- My doctor noticed my gear. You know the only reason for riding a bike is to look bad ass and get attention. The doctor also lectured me about how dangerous it is and how it's improper for a girl to ride motorcycles.

- Cars didn't come close to me. They were too busy passing me up. Since I was going at the speed limit, they could tell I was a beginner. Plus being a girl and Asian... they knew better than to get close to me on the road.

- Nobody honked at me. Instead, they honked at the dude not paying attention to the traffic light.

- Last but not least, both Francesca and I made it home in one piece.

Baby steps.

Growing up is messy.

2010-03-06T15:33:00.000-08:00

I know that I have to start paying back my student loans. So far, I've only received mail from the university regarding one of my loans. Then I realized I have another account opened with Sallie Mae, but I haven't heard from them yet. After frantically going through all my old papers, I realized I owe more than I originally thought. SM must have sent their letters to my apartment in LA....

Yes, they did. I checked my account online (I forgot I made one with them.) They had the Bentley place on file. FU.CK ME. I am already late on my first payment. On top of that, the numbers didn't match up. SM says I owe (let's make up the numbers) 545K. On paper I only see two loans of about 120K each. I checked my other loans. The university says I owe about 15K. I found papers that added up to nearly 68K. Then I found some papers about a loan I canceled. So, how much do I really owe and are there any other loans that have not yet been accounted for?

I ordered a credit report online to check. Nothing on there added up. It wasn't up to date with my credit card balance. The amount on the report for SM didn't match with my online account or my papers. It didn't include my other loan. Oh my goodness. I am getting a headache. On top of that, Lion's hook up flaked and tickets for OVO sold out on Gold Star, so I had to pay full price for the tickets.

Of course, when there's a low, there's a high. My very smart friend, let's call her Dr. B, sent me a link. There's a website that tracks all of your student loans. How freaking fantastic is that? From there, the numbers finally matched up with each other, even the loan I canceled is on file. I took a closer look at all of my accounts and reports. SM charged me a late fee, which was only 4 bucks. I checked my credit score and am damn proud of it. I paid more than double the amount I would have had to for OVO, but the official website shows you your exact seats, so I picked out some pretty good seats.

Now I am finally relaxed. I have some online training to do for the NY trip. I have to clean up the mess I made. I have papers everywhere on the floor, but it's okay. My mind is at peace; Money matters have been straightened out. And yes... this is how lame my weekends have become. Have a great weekend everybody. Stay warm. Don't drink too much tonight.

The results are...

2010-03-02T18:27:00.000-08:00

MCAT: 1. P-huong: 0.

I got my scores today. It was disappointing to know I have to find time to study and take the beast all over again, but I'm optimistic. I did well on the physcial science (PS), biological science (BS), and the writing portions. The verbal reasoning (VR) totally kicked my ass. I ran out of time for that section and had to breeze through the last two passages. That is obviously reflected in my score since I ended up in the single digit range. ::whomp whomp::

Just a quick review on the MCAT scoring system: The BS, PS, and VR are all scored on a scale of 1 to 15 with 15 being the highest. The written portion is given a letter grade K-T with T being the highest. To put these numbers in prospective, the average MCAT score for UCSF medical students is a 36. I forget what the average writing score is, but I have read that the writing section serves no greater purpose than to wear out the test taker before the final BS section. Shame. I did well on the written part and would have gladly sacrificed some of those "points" for a higher score in verbal. ::whomp whomp::

So, what's the next step? Figuring out the next test date. I can take it in April and get my scores back in May. I can also take it in May and get my score back in June, a day or two after the application cycle opens. Med schools work on a rolling cycle, so the earlier I apply, the better. I have to sit down and really think if I can prepare myself for the April test date. If not, I'm sure taking it in May won't affect me in any way. June isn't an option because I want to take some summer classes to make up for low grades. I don't want to have to balance classes, work, and the MCAT. I might as well roll over and play dead.

Alright, alright. Enough of this depressing, boring, headache driving thoughts about the MCAT. Let's talk about MOTORCYCLES, CIRQUE DU SOLEIL, SB, MONEY, and NEW YORK.

I rode Francesca for an hour over the weekend, after the sad loss of the men's US hockey team. And I dropped her. Amazingly, I found out that I am strong enough to pick the bike up all by myself. That's right. Don't mess with these guns. After SB teaches me ju-jitsu, I'll can officially call myself a Bad Ass (that's right, proper noun.)

SB and I are going to see Ovo by Cirque du Soleil. I am very excited because it'll be his first time seeing them. I'm sure he'll love it, especially because he'll probably be stoned during the performance.

As you can tell, SB and I are doing very well. In fact, so well that I've turned into a complete sap. I get all excited when he texts me. I get all giddy when I know I'll finally get to see him. It's quite pathetic. Don't be surprise if you find pink shit, hearts, and lovey dovey changes on the blog layout. Ha, just joking. I ain't no pu.ssy.

On to some more good news, I have enough money saved up to pay off my entire student loan! This is great because the loan company plans on collecting interest next month. No, that doesn't mean I have THAT much money. I worked through college so my student debt is nothing compared to most, but still, it feels great to know I will be debt free. Then I can start splurging on motorcycle gear.

Also next month is my trip to New York. It's for work, but with how things are going, it looks like I might have to spend over a week over on the east coast. Plans aren't finalized yet, but if all goes as I hope, I get to turn this trip into a vacation. Originally, I wasn't excited for the trip because it sounded like they would only fly me out for two or three days, just long enough to finish the timed experiments, ship the specimen back to California, and hop back on the plane. Now, it seems as though I need to fly in the week before to finish some training, perform the experiment the following week, and the NY lab prefers that I stay and perform the one week time point for the experiment. Originally, I was only in charge of taking the 4, 12, and 24 hour time points of the experiment and the NY lab would perform the 48 hour and one week time points. Does that make sense? Just know I'm excited and it's good news. More work, but good news.

Okay, ta ta kids. Behave. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. And ladies (and any guys interested), just in case you don't read through the comments, Mr. Big Shot wears no ring on his left hand. Keep you updated if I find the nerve to talk to the man.

Update: I signed up for the next available test. Unfortunately, there are no more test centers with available seats in California for the April test dates or May 1. Hell no am I going out of state to take the test, although Bex says some people do actually do that. Also, the price of the exam went up $5! And I am taking the test in South San Francisco and not San Jose. My other option I believe was Fresno. You know what I think of Fresno??... not much.

Clarity

2010-02-21T11:37:00.000-08:00

Before Wednesday morning, I hadn't had coffee for more than six weeks and my body was not ready for the caffeine load.

I fell asleep on the train and knew I would need some coffee to get through my day. It was going to be a busy one. We're so close to finishing up one of the experiments under the new grant. Of course, almost finishing one meant we've started preparing for the next one. There's not enough time in the week to get everything done. I stopped by the coffee shop on my way to work.

I love this place. They serve nothing but coffee. Each cup is brewed when it is ordered, no need to worry how long the coffee's been sitting in the pot. I ordered my usual, the Handmade Espresso: a cup of joe comprised of their espresso (for that bold taste) and one of their light coffees (for the extra jolt. I forget which kind they use for this particular drink.) (FYI: The darker the roast, the less caffeine it has.)

I took my first sip when I got out the door and continued walking down the street toward campus. It felt heavenly, best cup of coffee EVER.

I don't know if I was really that tired, or perhaps it had something to do with the nap on the train and the chilly morning weather in San Francisco and being so close to the bay, but that was seriously the best sip of coffee I had ever had. The coffee was at the perfect temperature, hot but not too hot that I have to carefully sip it through a straw. The taste was bold and it sent a wave of energy through my body. The cup warmed my hands. I noticed that the cup felt heavier than usual. They normally only give you half a cup of the stuff because it's an "espresso." Score, I now know which barista to approach when I want a little extra coffee in my cup. As I got to work and sat down in the break room to finish my breakfast, I noticed I was seeing things clearer than normal: colors appeared brighter and more vibrant and lines were sharp. Aw shit, is this my first caffeine high? Damn, I love this stuff.

(This was actually not a good day to have my first caffeine high. My hands started trembling and I was working with sharp objects all day long.)

Mr. Big Shot, Will You Be My Sugar Daddy?

2010-02-09T22:08:00.000-08:00

I've been checking out this guy at work. No, SB and I have been doing very well. I'm not cheating on him. I just like admiring people for their classy pick of clothes.

I first noticed Mr. Big Shot when I saw him carrying a Prada man purse. Then one day, while I was walking behind him, I caught myself checking out his leather shoes. That's when I wondered to myself, "Wow, how much does this man make?" He always has on nice tailored pants and cashmere sweaters. Not to mention his hair has a healthy shine to it, too.

I decided to ask my favorite post-doc, Amber, who is the all-knowing New Yorker whom I idolize.

P: "Amber, how much do you think Mr. Big Shot makes?"

A: "You mean from his job or his from his patents?"

P: "What do you mean?"

A: "Well, he owns the patent for _____." [I can't remember the actual name.]

P: "What's _____?"

A: "It's a type of chemotherapy used to treat cancer patients."

P: ::stupid look on face::

Can you even begin to imagine how much money he makes from that ONE patent? Remember, Amber had said patentS. Did I mention that he is also the director of the building? Cha-ching!

A: "Yeah, I wouldn't mind if he wanted to adopt me. I don't think my parents would mind either."

Unfortunately, I'm too old to be adopted and the man is old enough to be my father. I have no idea if Mr. Big Shot is married or if he's even straight. I just know he has millions to his name, travels to prestigious universities to give talks, and can shower his lover with Prada accessories, cashmere sweaters, and weekly spa trips. Who ever he's with, that is one lucky man/woman.

NYE

2009-12-31T13:50:00.000-08:00

Is anyone else feelin' it? Because I totally think 2010 is going to be an amazing year.

I'm trying to think back to last year to see if I felt the same way about 2009. I honestly can't remember what I did for New Year's last year. I went to Vegas, right? No, that was right after finals, before the holidays even began. You know what, f*ck this. I can't remember and instead of forcing my brain to remember stupid memories, I should be clearing space to memorize all this o-chem. Quickly, who can tell me what kind of solvent favors SN1 reactions?

However, I do remember what I felt during the 2009 Lunar New Year. No, I wasn't filled with joy because I had red envelopes with $100 in them. I was worried. I remember looking into the yearly horoscope for my animal and feeling like I need to be cautious this year.

I did a lot of thinking and planning this past year. I had to be careful with what I was leaving behind and had to really think about how I wanted to go about all the changes that happened. I needed to leave UCLA with the connections that would help me with my future endeavors. I needed to cut off any of the bad ones. I needed to consider what would happen to my family and friends if I had stayed in LA. I needed to figure out the best post-grad scenario that would allow me to survive in the crashing economy and start a successful career. And all that thinking and planning paid off because look at me now. I couldn't be in a better place.

Looking back, I can say that 2009 was a big year for me, not a great year, but definitely one to remember. I know all of you who have been with me this past year are thinking, "What?!?! Is she crazy?!? She learned how to surf, graduated college, found a job in this sh*t-tastic economy, bought a motorcycle, met a boy who would drive an hour just to have coffee with her..." (Sorry for rubbing it in.)

It's been a good year... but this is only the beginning. 2010 is it. 2010 is when I take the MCATs. 2010 is when I decide if I am going to apply for medical school. 2010 is the year I'm going make up for lost time with my family and friends while I was away at college. This new year is going to be when I start figuring out who really matters and when I decide what I want to do with the rest of my life. I know I sound crazy and that I'm blowing 2010 out of proportion, but I really think this is all going to happen next year.

With that said, I hope to have you all with me next year and best of luck to everybody. May all your wishes, dreams, and fantasies come true. If you are going out tonight, have fun and be safe. If you're staying in, stay warm and have a restful night. Cheers.

Here's my advice.

2009-12-14T21:00:00.001-08:00

As fate would have it, once I received my M1 endorsement and December paycheck, I stumbled upon a Craigslist ad for the perfect bike: a yellow Kawasaki Ninja 250 (without the lame red flames) well within my budget. Sure, it was a bit older than the others advertised, but for the price and knowing this would be my first bike, it was perfect.

A lot of the guys at work ride, so I decided to ask them for their advice for the meet up. I know nothing about bikes besides the fact that they are the epitome of bad ass. Boss said, "Make sure you test ride it." No kidding, man.

Later that week, Boss and I had a busy day in the mouse room. It was just him and me. All day. In a room with no windows. And a bunch of rodents. It actually wasn't that bad. We had lots to talk about: the holidays, going to school, our dream jobs, motorcycles, commuting (we both live a long ways from work)...

Boss: "Hey, you want my advice? Here, I've got one: find yourself a boyfriend who will drive you to work and back home. That's my advice!" (AKA he secretly wants a sugar momma to chauffeur him around.)

I laughed on the inside. If only he knew... well, he eventually found out...

At the holiday party, SB made his debut. We had plans to hang out after work. After I found out about the holiday party, I told him that if he could find a parking spot, he should join the festivities. He piggybacked his way into the building and it was so crowded, security didn't bother to stop him and make him sign in. I showed him around, we grabbed some food, and I introduced him to some of my colleagues who were eating by us. The other colleagues were all the way across the floor. They stared, pointed, and asked questions. Boss was bombarded with questions. Everyone assumed Boss would know who the party crasher was since I spend the most time with him at work.

The following day, Boss was going over all of our planned future experiments with me. Eventually, the holiday party came up during our discussion:

P: "Oh, so that was SB. We've been going out and he usually takes me home after work. Hey, I took your advice! Well, half of it. I still need to find a better way to get to work."

Boss (laughing): "See... It's good, right? You should always take my advice!!"

Yes, Kuya Boss is always right.

So SB and I have been going out and it's been going well.

Well, the relationship is going well. I, however, feel ridiculous. All of a sudden I find myself constantly thinking about him. Everyone who knows me in real life would say this is a huge surprise. (Psshhh, I don't get like this over A GUY.) I like to think of myself as an independent woman, with a good head on her shoulders, who has a promising future ahead of her, and one who can out-drink the guys (I really can't but I put in a good run. I know when to call my limit. Puking is not classy.)

Changes are happening within. My day doesn't feel complete if I don't hear from him. I go to sleep wishing he was next to me. I wake up wondering if he had a good night's sleep. I forget all about the senseless San Ho drama when I think of him. Love songs hit a spot that I never knew existed. It's pathetic.