My Friend Amy

The Vampire Diaries 3x15: All My Children

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 09:42:23 PST

Does this season have a point? The episode tonight kind of bored me. I was surprised Esther was already planning the ritual to kill off her children and correct her mistake so quickly, but hey I guess that makes sense. Kidnapping Elena to get the Salvatore brothers to do what you want also makes sense. The Salvatore brothers not even blinking an eye about turning Bonnie's mother was bothersome but hey that's this show right?

I hope Esther's not really gone because that would be silly. The idea that there's another tree that can kill them kind of made me roll my eyes. Klaus falling out of love with Caroline because she used him happened way too fast, they played that card much too quickly. Meredith shooting Alaric was a nice touch, but I doubt he's really gone.

I guess I thought two scenes were interesting here. The end scene with Bonnie, Elena, and Caroline. Bonnie is always getting hurt due to things that directly involve Elena. And it's not always Elena's fault, but it would be impossible not to resent that you are constantly losing things because of this person in your life, even if you love them. I mean certainly you'd reach a point where you might consider that the best thing for yourself would be to NOT BE AROUND THAT PERSON. I thought originally that Esther's spell might kill off all vampires and I was secretly hoping Elena would be conflicted over that...like almost wanting them to die so she could have her normal life back. But...I think two and a half seasons in I have to face the fact that TVD will never give me a story line that delicious.

I also thought Elena and Rebekah's scene was interesting because I know there's a considerable amount of frustration with Elena's portrayal from viewers. And I thought it was interesting that they used Rebekah to voice what I think is that frustration. But then...it ended up all being about how Rebekah's feelings were hurt. LOL. Oh well. But to be honest, considering how everyone bends over backwards to save Elena's life and don't even feel any remorse over the collateral damage except in how it will affect Elena's view of them, it makes sense others would resent that. And it also makes me consider what Elena is supposed to represent on the show. Humanity? Goodness? I mean even Elijah felt like he had to apologize to her even though if she hadn't lied to him in the first place and made sure he drank that champagne he wouldn't have been in the position to fight for his life.

Anyway, TVD is on a break for awhile, and this was kind of a weak episode to end on. I hope the rest of the season finds some steam because strangely I have absolutely no idea what they are building towards.

In other news, I've decided to give up on The Secret Circle for now, I might go back at some point and watch the rest of the season, but for now no.

CFBA Book Spotlight: Sixty Acres and a Bride by Regina Jennings

mypalamy@gmail.com — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 18:51:00 PST

About the Book: With nothing to their names, young widow Rosa Garner and her mother-in-law return to Texas and the family ranch. Only now the county is demanding back taxes and the women have only three months to pay.

Though facing eviction, Rosa can't keep herself from falling in love with the countryside and the wonderful extended family who want only her best. Learning the American customs is not easy, however, and this beautiful young widow can't help but catch wandering eyes. Where some offer help with dangerous strings attached, only one man seems honorable. But when Weston Garner, still grieving his own lost love, is unprepared to give his heart, to what lengths will Rosa go to save her future?

Emotional Reactions to the Art We Consume

mypalamy@gmail.com — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 00:15:33 PST

A couple of weeks ago, one of the TV journalists I follow on Twitter mentioned how they find it strange that people equate their emotional reaction to a film with the film's objective quality. I wish I had screen capped the tweet as I cannot remember who said it, but it forced me to start thinking about how we determine the worth of art.

I would say the reason we have professional critics is so that we have people who are supposed to evaluate a film, book, TV show, album, etc. based on what are considered to be the more objective qualities of a piece of work, to evaluate if they accomplish what they set forth to do, and if they take new risks. To do this, though, a professional critic must deny their emotional reaction to a piece of work and I wonder if that's entirely possible. The way we take in and perceive art will always be colored by our own understandings and limitations so while I do think professional critics strive to do this in a way the casual consumer of art does not, it is still just that...very limited.

I read a book by one of my favorite authors recently. This author's work has made me weep in the past, with her insight into the human condition, her ability to capture very complex emotions in just a few sentences. Her newest work, however, failed to move me in any way emotionally. It's not that it wasn't just as expertly crafted as everything else she has written or that the heavy weight of sorrow wasn't present in the book, because it was all there. She created a whole world in her usual succinct way. The structure of the story was perfect and the characters obstacles were exactly the ones they needed to have. I just didn't connect despite the fact that I feel the book was very good. I have to admit I felt disappointed even though it's not like she let me down in any way. She wrote a book and it was good, artsy, poetic, and it should have been touching I think, but I felt nothing. I am likely to forget it in time and when I'm asked for recommendations it probably won't be the first one I mention.

For me as a reader, I can look at books and acknowledge they are well written or what they have meant to society, but the books that will have the most worth to me are the ones that I connect with emotionally. Even the books that challenge me intellectually will pale in significance to the books that connect with my inner emotions, that engage my heart. I think, of course, it's entirely possible and maybe even best if a book does both!

There are TV shows as well that I can acknowledge as good without loving them. I tried to watch The Wire and while it wasn't my cup of tea, I know it was well written. On the flip side of that, a show I loved a lot, such as Lost, I can admit to having many flaws (but they just don't bother me that much because I loved it!) Or even a book like Mockingjay, I love flaws and all, and I fully accepted the story as I received it. Which isn't to say that everyone should. Part of what makes us distinct human beings is the fact that we react in different ways both emotionally and intellectually to the art we consume. And sometimes...sometimes I react in a strong emotional way to something that is very, poorly written or executed, and some are designed to manipulate your emotions in such a way. They are often tools to release our emotions in ways we find limiting in day to day life.

I'm not really making any broader point here, except that while I can surely recognize the more objective qualities of a piece of art, it will forever be hard for me to call something really good unless it moves me. At the same time, I don't want to depend entirely on my emotions for such determinations.

How about you? What makes something good for you?

Ana, by the way, wrote a fantastic post about objectivity and reviews and book blogging etc. You should read it.

Class of 2K12 Interview with AC Gaughen, Author of Scarlet

mypalamy@gmail.com — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 01:25:54 PST

Throughout the year I'll be bringing you some interviews with the authors over at the Class of 2K12! I hope you will enjoy getting to know these authors and thoughts on their books better. Today I'm bringing you an interview with AC Gaughen. Her book, Scarlet, comes out today!

Do you share any similarities with your characters?

God yes. Scarlet and I are super grumpy. I really wanted to write a heroine that was honest to God grumpy pretty often, because I am worse than a grizzly bear some times, and I would like to personally lead a revolution to make that seem endearing rather than obnoxious. Step 1: SCARLET

How did your book change from the first draft to the final draft?

It got bigger. I had to pad out a few scenes and explain a little more--I’m guilty of underwriting when it comes to Scarlet.

What kind of research did you have to do for the book?

A lot! Did you know leading research would have me believe that Robin Hood was not actually a real person, but more likely a bard’s amalgamation of several different thieves over a range of about 200 years? And yet it’s one of the most culturally revisited legends in the English language.

How did you react when you saw the cover of your book?

I went all Rachel Zoe and I died. In a good, fashionable way. I love the cover and I think Walker did an insanely awesome job and the cover artists is ludicrously talented.

Who is your ideal reader?

I think my ideal reader is me at fifteen--a girl who wants to really get out there and start taking names, and wants to see herself in a novel with a heroine who is good at something other than simpering. Or gasping.

Would you rather deal with an alien invasion or a zombie apocalypse?

Oh definitely the zombies. I think I would fare better, and I’ll tell you why: over the past several years, I keep trying to learn to run. I read SHAPE and SELF and lots of magazines that start with S and I try and it just doesn’t stick. Aliens would have to be very spry to invade, and I feel there would be a lot of running involved, possibly with dirt streaked across my face. Terrible runner and my pores just can’t handle the dirt. In a zombie apocalypse, I could definitely use my wits to aid me. And possibly a large tank.

About Scarlet: SCARLET is a retelling of the Robin Hood legend. Most of Nottinghamshire knows Will Scarlet: a quick and clever thief that sticks to the shadows and protects the band without question, but even those that know Scarlet’s really a girl don’t know the secrets of her past, like how she got the scar on her cheek. Guy of Gisbourne may be the one person who does: and he was just hired to bring Robin Hood and his gang to the gallows.

Presidents Should Always Fight Vampires and Also The Hunger Games

mypalamy@gmail.com — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 16:59:21 PST

The trailer for Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter was released today and in my opinion it looks like a lot of fun. I didn't read the book, but seriously what's not to love about the good president fighting vamps?

Also, the soundtrack for The Hunger Games movie is available for pre-order and the track listing made me squee with a bit of glee I must admit. Arcade Fire! The Civil Wars! The Decemberists! Glen Hansard! Looking forward to it.

And lastly the new music video for Taylor Swift's "Safe and Sound" premiered tonight. I'm linking you to the MTV page and sorry it's not available outside of the US but surely YouTube will fix that soon.

To be honest, the amount of hype this movie is getting worries me. I love these books, but things might go horribly horribly wrong with the movie. And as much as I love The Hunger Games, there's such a thing as hearing about the movie too much and also missing the point. We shall see. Obviously none of this is stopping me from posting about it today.

The Sunday Salon: So Much Stuff I Can't Express

mypalamy@gmail.com — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 01:28:03 PST

Whitney Houston

I wasn't ever really a...fan of Whitney Houston though I did love many of her popular songs. But like the rest of the world, I felt the weight and sadness of her premature death, a death most likely the result of some of the most vicious and unrelenting personal demons a person can face.

My own personal Whitney Houston memory I suppose is learning "The Greatest Love of All" in elementary school choir. The funny thing about it is that it has this message about truly loving yourself as the greatest love of all, which the little evangelically minded girl in me took issue with. The greatest love of course is God's love for us and our love for him and each other. It could never be that we should love ourselves. Sometimes I look back on those years, as a child, as a teen where I thought loving yourself or talking about self-esteem were ridiculous humanist, selfish ideas and I never realized that my own self esteem was non-existent. The concept of loving myself was never valid to me. It took a series of destructive relationships and some counseling in my early twenties to even begin to embrace the idea. I will never forget the breakthrough I had when I was sitting in counseling one day and my counselor told me it was okay to love myself. I left and literally wept on the drive home because it was like seeing the world in a whole new way. And you know strangely this song came back to me, this song I'd sung against my better conscience as a child, as an adult I was able to see it in a new way. (btw I know this song was originally recorded by George Benson but I only knew of it because of Whitney) I don't have much else to say about Whitney Houston besides that, but I'm sure a lot of other people have much better tributes. For me, I have only this full circle story of originally rejecting the ideas her music brought into my life and later embracing their truth.

Here's a vid of it for your enjoyment.

Twitter

I considered writing a whole post about this but instead I think I will just vent a little bit today. I recognize that everyone uses Twitter differently, but a huge pet peeve of mine is when Twitter users think it's appropriate to talk about how many people they follow, unfollowing a lot of people, and other things related to making people feel like they aren't quite good enough. To be clear, I'm not saying anything about the number of people you follow--that's entirely up to you, and regulating that makes a lot of sense due to DM privileges. I just think it's really tacky to tweet about how you are going to stop following mass numbers of people or how you only follow a few. It reeks of self-importance and it's just..not polite? I've seen all kinds of people do this by the way, from the CEO of a major publishing company to just your average blogger. I think it's just better Twitter etiquette to unfollow those people by mass QUIETLY and not say anything. Otherwise you are just calling attention to the fact that you no longer deem your followers as important enough to keep up with. It's all about perception!

TV this week

Strangely I don't have much to say. I liked The River but it's going to mainly just be a fun show I think? I really liked Alcatraz as well, but that's because I'm not expecting big answers anytime soon. Also it was kind of interesting to see a victim of the...whatever happened to them, lol. I haven't watched Switched at Birth yet and I really liked Revenge when I watched but I can't remember exactly why except that I felt more for the characters than normal? And I really liked seeing a soft side to Emily as well, the chink in her armor.

Film Club yes/no?

So this idea has been lingering forever about choosing movies to watch and discuss together but I keep not doing it despite positive feedback! But then I was looking up some director and realized his film was on Amazon Prime streaming and I thought, surely I need to watch this meaty discussion worthy thing knowing others are watching it too so we can discuss! So here's a form for you to fill out if you are interested..I figured we could do one a month and choose movies that are somehow available easily for the most part. And then I'll host a discussion post but you can also post on your blogs and it will be fun and we will learn a lot and become smarter. Or not. I mean I recognize that there are probably some other blogs doing this and I certainly know there are some Twitter nights but I'm not sure any of them fit the exact sort of thing I'm looking for. Also, I'd love a co-host. So if anyone wants to co-host please let me know in the notes on the form!

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New Host Needed!

Speaking of things I host, you may have noticed that Faith and Fiction Saturday has disappeared. I no longer really have an interest in hosting this as a weekly meme. The only thing I'm still interested in is the round table discussion. Part of the problem is that Christian fiction as a whole is losing some of its allure to me, I feel like I've discussed the issues to death and nothing really changes. I mean this press release from Thomas Nelson (HT: Hannah) based on what the most passionate fans of Christian fiction want reflect NOTHING that I want so I think it's time to just let it go? I will keep reading the authors that I already know are wonderful and just leave it at that. Anyway all that to say, if you are interested in taking over Faith and Fiction Saturday, please email me! mypalamyATgmail.com Or if you just want more info on what it was, etc. I will still host the round table, though! Just so that's clear.

I guess that's it for this week, I'd love to hear your thoughts on any and all of the above. Are you watching the Grammys? Did you watch The River? Do you still curse Twitter and everything it stands for? Do you have special Valentine's Day plans?

Review: The Legacy of Eden by Nelle Davy + Giveaway

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 22:28:10 PST

When Meredith Pincetti learns news that her cousin has passed away and left her family farm behind in financial ruins she's determined to go back and sort through her family's belongings and history. But it's not such an easy task. She's been out of touch with her family and the history at the farm is extraordinarily painful for their family. So as she begins making her voyage back, she also starts remembering and coming to terms with her own sins of the past.

There were a few things I liked about this book. I liked that it was set in Iowa where I spent my first years of memory and certain things that happened felt very small town midwesternish to me. I thought it was interesting that it was built around an estate where the family literally made blood oaths of allegiance because I think the concept of tying identity to land and property like that can be really interesting. The idea of a complicated family history with a strong matriarch also has a lot of potential.

But ultimately this book just didn't do it for me. I felt like the foretelling of the doom and tragedy of the past was too heavy handed over the earlier parts of the narrative so that the things that actually happened couldn't live up to it. I mean most of what happened ended up being really predictable. Also because Meredith was telling her family's history and not her own, it felt like a lot of telling and not showing to me. I could never really feel the characters she depicted because her narration was too detached and too prescriptive throughout. I was told to see certain characters in certain ways instead of being allowed to get to know them and form my own opinions. I also didn't like that every transgression that occurred was sexual in nature and that there were no really close relationships. I don't know just nothing about the actual story worked for me, and I can't say why without spoiling it and since this book is built on the idea of mystery I don't want to do that.

I think the story would have benefited from deeper POV with the characters and less forced atmospheric telling.

Rating: 2/5
Source of Book: Received for review
Publisher: Mira (Harlequin)

GIVEAWAY

I do have a copy of the book to give away if you're interested in reading this and since most people really enjoyed it you should be!

Guest Post: Nelle Davy Author of The Legacy of Eden

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 01:20:15 PST

How to create a dark story in a stereotypically “bright,” friendly place like Iowa.

That was never a problem for me. No place is a halcyon. Everywhere has problems and issues. Katherine Anne-Porter who is an amazing author and one of my favourite short story writers once said, “In the nicest houses people do the worst things to one another.” That saying stayed with me throughout writing the novel and reminded me of the story I wanted to tell. In some ways I don’t feel the story is as dark as it could have been. In I Claudius (the inspiration for the novel) there are far worse things including murder so I had to actually scale things down somewhat for the story to make it more believable in a modern setting. What I did not realize until I began reading it again after all this time is how malicious it is, but it was so enjoyable to write I completely forgot about that aspect of it. This was what the characters I had created would do and I just immersed myself in their behaviour. I didn’t really concentrate on the darkness; I just wanted to make the reader understand why they did what they did. I suppose I am drawn to literature that explores characters and novels that feel like studies in human behaviour because I find the human animal endlessly fascinating. It just so happens that in my first novel I chose to explore the more darker parts.

The Vampire Diaries 3x14: Dangerous Liaisons

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 01:03:41 PST

I liked this episode but didn't love it. I was interested in the Originals story line, but they were sort of underwhelming and the show is starting to feel way too crowded. With so many originals, it's hard to make each one of them interesting and devote sufficient time to the characters on the show I already know and love. I mean Tyler got two seconds of phone call time and Bonnie was completely MIA.

I did enjoy all the pretty of the ball and was feeling relieved I wasn't invited since I'm not sure I'd have known all the dances. I thought it was cute how Caroline was so resistant to Klaus, especially since he was so over the top in his affections straight away. But...I'm not going to lie, I did enjoy their scenes. I thought it was cute the way he just came right out and told her he fancied her and the reasons he gave are the reasons I love Caroline, too. Caroline digging straight to his dysfunction was characteristic of her heart as well. My personal dream theory is that Caroline will be the one to get close to Klaus and kill him, but when she does she'll be conflicted because she'll have seen his humanity. I liked, though, that Caroline misses Tyler. I can't help it, I still ship them, despite how terribly handled their story line has been this season. I have faint hope that it can be turned around.

Elena was actually interesting to me this episode! It was pretty clear to me that Elena wants both Stefan and Damon and that will only blow up in her face eventually. But I loved her last scene with Stefan and to be honest, I'm ready for old Stefan to emerge. But I don't want him to just be all emo over Elena all the time. Damon justified his controlling behavior by saying he loved Elena and that did not go well. But anyway, I was proud of Elena for going to see Esther on her own, but then she had a brief stupid moment where she gave her blood without questioning it. I think that was so that her moral dilemma came not before giving her blood but afterwards. Lying to Elijah, though! :( I think it's interesting all the originals are bound together now and I suppose there's probably a reverse spell but will anyone care to do it? Also, Elena mentioning to Stefan that he trusted her and let her make her own choices was interesting to me in both the context of her relationship to both brothers and the ideas of free will and choice the show flirts with.

Matt/Rebekah/Kol plot bored me to tears. Rebekah annoyed me this episode which is sad because I used to really like her. But lol at Damon and Stefan sharing all their significant loves.

So overall a moderately entertaining episode, I kind of like the set-up of witches vs. vampires and Esther attempting to undo the unnatural thing she set into motion.

What did everyone else think?

(I haven't watched The Secret Circle yet)

CFBA Book Spotlight: Blue Moon Bay by Lisa Wingate

mypalamy@gmail.com — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 18:40:25 PST

About the Book: Heather Hampton returns to Moses Lake, Texas, to help facilitate the sale of a family farm as part of a planned industrial plant that will provide the area with much-needed jobs. Heather's future fiance has brokered the deal, and Heather is in line to do her first large-scale architectural design--if the deal goes through.

But the currents of Moses Lake have a way of taking visitors on unexpected journeys. What was intended to be a quick trip suddenly morphs into Valentine's week--with Blaine Underhill, the handsome banker who just happens to be opposing Heather's project. Spending the holiday in an ex-funeral parlor seems like a nightmare, but Heather slowly finds herself being drawn into the area's history, hope, and heart.

Guest Post: Margaret Wurtele Author of The Golden Hour

mypalamy@gmail.com — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 23:05:50 PST

As my novel The Golden Hour emerged onto the page, it took me into aspects of life that I have explored before. Not surprising! There are subjects that, no matter how much I write, will probably never be exhausted for me. My first two books were memoirs, so I dealt very openly with these areas. In this, my first novel, it was my characters who led me inexorably into well-tread territory.

The first area is death and loss. My father died just after I finished writing the novel. Though a central relationship in the book is between the father Enrico Bellini and his daughter Giovanna, their conflict and dynamics are quite different from those in my own family. I was so affected by witnessing my father’s death, however, that I rewrote the beginning and end of the novel, enclosing the entire story within an account of a much older Giovanna at the scene of her father’s death.

My own son was killed in 1995 in a mountain climbing accident when he was 22. My second memoir Touching the Edge was a meditation on parenting and my journey through that profound loss. I don’t want to give away too much of my novel’s story, but suffice it to say that The Golden Hour gave me a chance to revisit the territory.

Another area in which I love to dwell is religion and spirituality. My first memoir, Taking Root took the form of a journal, a year in the garden, and chronicled my own spiritual awakening. I grew up in a secular and almost anti-religious household, and – in my forties – was baptized and confirmed in the Episcopal Church. During that period of change, I read widely in Buddhist and Christian literature and recorded many of my insights in the memoir.

Writing The Golden Hour offered me a rich buffet of opportunities to explore these same issues. My parents – while secular in their orientation – both lived themselves and raised their children with deeply held principles of religious tolerance. I found it challenging and fascinating to grapple with the evil perpetrated by the Nazis, and to inhabit Giovanna and her Catholic father, who pushed each other nearly to the brink over her love for a Jewish freedom fighter.

I have had a number of mentors in my life – teachers and spiritual guides. I loved writing about Giovanna and the two nuns, Sisters Graziella and Elena, who shaped her coming-of-age in such significant ways.

At first glance, historical fiction seems to take its author into strange and distant lands, to require much research and necessitate a creative leap into the unknown. That is true to an extent, but for me, it also delivered unexpected gifts: fascinating new angles from which to explore beloved themes.

Margaret Wurtele is the author of two memoirs. She and her husband split their time between Minnesota and Napa Valley, where they are owners of Terra Valentine Winery. Visit her online at www.margaretwurtele.com.

Life and Thoughts in Bullet Points! Don't Miss This Riveting Post!

mypalamy@gmail.com — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 23:23:34 PST

So I was just listening to Lana del Rey's album (which I really like--I don't know apparently she had a bad SNL performance or something and some people hate her--stuff I gather from my Twitter timeline) and I realized there is a song called "Diet Mt. Dew" on it. JOY OF MY LIFE. Even better is the stunning heartrending truth the song speaks, "you're no good for me." So true, but I love it anyway. Seriously, though, this album is so depressing, like all these MESSED UP relationships and ideas of love. Music feeds our love addiction more than anything I think! Even worse than movies and vampire novels!

I'm on a nonfiction reading kick which almost never happens, but I'm trying to read the Feminists Classics book for the month, which is, Feminism is for Everybody by Bell Hooks. I have very cobbled together ideas about feminism, growing up in the environment I did it was sort of a dirty word and it wasn't until well a few years into adulthood that I let those ideas be challenged. WHY AM I ALWAYS BEHIND ON LIFE? But anyway, I'm reading that as well as The Shallows by Nicholas Carr because lately I've been having very different ideas about the internet and relationships and relationships on the internet than I've ever had before. And this book is about the way the internet is actually changing the wiring in our brains, and I've felt like that's a really big problem for me. And at the very least I want to understand that even if I can't change it. So this is the first of a few books I plan to read on the way the internet has actually changed the way we think as well as our relationships and I suspect I will be writing about it in the future. And the other nonfiction book I'm reading (because I do not understand book monogamy thanks to the internet) is Fast Girls: Teenage Tribes and the Myth of the Slut which is a book I got at The Book Warehouse when they were closing. It's an interesting topic, and addresses a lot of ideas I find fascinating, like the way we cast roles for one another in society.

I saw Chronicle and I liked it. I mean the first half of the movie is pure clever fun and the second half goes crazy and loses momentum even if it makes sense. I was really impressed in a way with how they established the main character, I mean it's like an origins story. But the tonal change of the film reminded me a lot of Hancock? Also if you have a hard time buying found footage films this one COMPLETELY escapes believability. But I don't know I didn't really care. The characterization of the main character is so well done. It's just...different. So I liked it a lot. Even if it was all boys.

Andrew Peterson has a new album coming out Augustish. FRIENDS THIS IS THE KIND OF NEWS THAT MAKES EVERYTHING SUNNY AND BRIGHT IN MY LIFE. Seriously, I remember I was so depressed in 2009 and I was like, but 2010 will be better because Andrew Peterson has a new CD coming out. And that's how I feel again. Okay so I'm exaggerating a little bit. I forced my family to listen to Andrew Peterson over the holidays and they just didn't get it and I wanted to weep and return to that moment at Hutchmoot (the first) where I realized I had found my people.

Speaking of new music The Fray's new album found it's way into my hands today (okay I preordered it) and...I haven't listened to it yet. I will only have one chance to listen to it for the first time okay? And what if it's bad?!?

Courtney Summers announced her next book and it sounds AWESOME. (she could probably announce her next book was a reinterpretation of the phone book and I'd think it sounded awesome) Seriously she is fantastic, please read her right this second.

Has anyone read The Bronze Horseman trilogy? I'm suddenly seeing these books popping up everywhere in NATURAL enthusiastic recommendations (i.e. at the bookstore, an actress on TVD mentioned loving them to death, etc.) and I'm tempted because supposedly they are fab love stories, but I don't know. I would love to hear some feedback!

The Sunday Salon -- Go Giants?

mypalamy@gmail.com — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 00:00:00 PST

Happy Super Bowl Sunday everyone! Are you planning on watching? If so who are you cheering for? I'll be watching and cheering for the Giants, but the truth is I don't really care who wins. And the commercials will probably be stupid, so.

The weather here has been so beautiful this week bordering on outright warm. Sometimes I forget about the charm in the area where I live, but it is beautiful in its own way, especially this time of year when it's not too hot and I was rediscovering that beauty this week. I think when you are surrounded by the same thing all the time it starts to feel so commonplace. And I wouldn't describe the scenery here as obviously gorgeous, it's almost an acquired taste. ;)

Books and Reading
I got some pretty exciting books in the mail this week, including Jacqueline Woodson's new one, and the ARC for Robert Goolrick's next book. I've already read the Woodson and will probably read the Goolrick soon! I'm trying not to pay too much attention to all the great books coming out, but it's so hard. I need to just read all the great books I already own.

I also read Lauren Winner's Still and finished up the The Legacy of Eden. I'm having a hard time setting on what to read next. I've started a few different choices but they aren't quite grabbing me yet. In January, I ended up reading 8 books, 6 of which were published in 2012. I kind of want a more even balance, but it's really hard not to get distracted by all the shiny new releases. Also, I read five male authors and three female which is really unusual for me and kind of depressing.

For those of you that tumble, The Millions has a great list of literary tumblrs. Also, Pete Peterson wrote a great review of one of my favorite books, Silence. And Strange Culture has a pretty great list of books being adapted to film for the year.

TV

Switched at Birth--The episode this week was..I don't know I didn't feel like all the parts quite flowed together or something about the execution of some of the story lines felt off. But even so, I loved it. This show always manages to hit the right emotional notes and Daphne and John's conversation at the end was pitch perfect and beautiful. Sometimes I feel like the parents have an honesty that I'm not sure is realistic, but I don't care, I still love it. Also, this is like the first episode ever where I liked John, so that's something! I was also glad Bay and Emmett finally talked about sex and using vegetable to talk about it was kind of cute. It's stuff like this I feel like the show does so well, and Bay's reaction to him not being a virgin...the fact that Bay is always allowed to have a reaction even if it doesn't last long is something I really appreciate.

Alcatraz--I really really liked this week's episode, and I find myself looking forward to the show more and more, fingers crossed it survives! I thought the back story was compelling in the episode and also more...illuminating about the overall story? So that was an effective use of the dual narrative. I felt like the overall story made significant advancements which is an improvement over last week.

Gossip Girl--ha ha I was wrong to think I'd find the 100th entertaining, Chuck and Blair have sapped all the energy and enjoyment out of the show. I feel like we've been watching 3x18-3x22 over and over for the last season and a half, and I'm ready for something different. I don't know if it even matters that Blair left the wedding with Dan if nothing really changes in the next few episodes I think I'll be done with this show. I'm just...losing interest.

I also caught up on Grimm, and it's still totally ridiculous but manages to keep my interest I guess. (actually what I like about it is that I don't have to pay 100 percent attention) I tried to watch Once Upon a Time again, but I don't know..the show just has this cheesy element I can't quite get over.

In development news, The Selection is already being developed for The CW which pretty much makes me want to stay far away from the book that hasn't even been released yet. This new Kripke pilot sounds like it has potential, though? I mean I really liked the first three seasons of Supernatural and I think if the show had been allowed to die a natural death in season 5 like he originally wanted/planned for it would have been better.

Also, Smash and The River both premiere this week I'll be watching! Please watch, too, so we can discuss next week! And Awake finally has a premiere date of March 1st which is so exciting, it's one of the shows I've been looking forward to the most. It did have creative troubles so who knows, but maybe if we all watch and it's brilliant it will be our next great love.

Film

I went to see One for the Money and keeping in mind that I never read the books, I actually thought it was okay! I mean if I turn a critical eye to it, sure it tried to be funny in ways it wasn't and was a bit clunky through transitions but sometimes I just don't care about that stuff. Ultimately, I just don't want to be bored. And I guess overall I enjoyed it.

I also finally watched Midnight in Paris, which I LOVED. It's so utterly charming! Tasha is right that it's not a love letter to Paris so much as a love letter to the idealized American version of Paris, but I sort of also think it's a love letter to great cities in general. There's this whole monologue about the art of a city that was so fantastic. But also all the historical figures that show up, like the Fitzgeralds and Hemingway and Gertrude Stein are so much fun. I don't know it's just really lovely.

And I watched 50/50 which I will save to talk about when I talk about The Fault in our Stars, and Drive which...I hated.

How were your weeks in entertainment? See any good movies? Read any good books? Watch any good TV or give up on any shows? Also, don't forget to tell me who should win the game today!

The Vampire Diaries 3x13: Bringing out the Dead and The Secret Circle 1x13 Medallion

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 17:13:45 PST

Vampire Royalty I really liked this episode of The Vampire Diaries because it featured my favorite thing in all the world, vampire brothers. Seriously, how fantastic was that dinner? I loved Elijah/Tatia/Klaus being the precursor to Stefan/Elena/Katherine/Damon and since they brought up Tatia does that mean we might get to meet her? Even if in flashbacks, I'd love it. I didn't really understand what they were saying about draining her blood, but sounds painful. Anyway, I didn't know if Elijah was going to come through or not, a suspense made possible by his betrayal last year. And super unpopular opinion, but Klaus screaming about how he's the hybrid made me squeal with glee...it's so Jonathan Rhys Meyers/Henry the VIII (I'm the King of England!). Which...if Klaus would go totally insane and become unpredictable and totally ruled by his passions, I think he'd be a lot more interesting and threatening. I still think Joseph Morgan does a great job switching from calm to chilling at the drop of a hat, but I'd be down for watching him as a spoiled brat. So I actually like the Original family story because it has so much potential as the royal family of vampires that will inevitably be torn apart from within...each one desperate for power and revenge! Please give me a good story show.

The Love Triangle I liked that Klaus brought up how he'd keep Elena safer than either brother could, because it's true. Up to this point, I do sort of see the show as one big struggle to save Elena's humanity and I'm coming to a sort of peace with the way they portray her (as always right, lol) if I view her as a symbol of all humanity. Saving Elena's humanity=saving humanity. Of course, Elena is supernatural, but I just kind of ignore that. So she's trusting Damon more now, and Stefan, I think, is coming more to terms with how he's lost her.

Caroline, Free Will, etc. I thought Caroline dealing with her dad's choice to die rather than become a vampire was a great story line, but I was LOL about Elena telling Caroline choice was the only thing her dad had. (or whatever) Like....didn't she just deny her brother that same choice? But free will has been a recurring theme this season and I really hope that Iris is right that maybe this is intentional. It's definitely one of the more interesting and complex themes the show could explore and so I'm kind of hoping it pops back up in Elena's story line with regards to Jeremy. I think that it could looking back at the season, since Jeremy did bring up his earlier compulsion before being compelled again. And since taking away his free will is decidedly anti-human, I think that having it resurface could be really powerful in Elena's continuing story line. I'm not holding my breath, but I'm slightly hopeful.

Bonnie and Mothers Bonnie's mother (another story line where choice came up) and Bonnie opened the coffin. I thought Bonnie telling her mother to try if she cared or was really sorry was nice. I don't know about this Original Mother though.

The Murders I have no theories! But I was confused about Alaric's ring working again. Did Bonnie fix it or something? I can't remember.

The Secret Circle

This episode bored me to be honest. I felt like the story line was a rehash of Diana's grandmother coming to town. I'm having a hard time emotionally connecting to the show, and I don't know why. Adam is seriously getting on my nerves. I just...don't have that much to say about it, except that Melissa getting addicted to drugs makes so much sense and could be interesting.

Review: The Odds by Stewart O'Nan

mypalamy@gmail.com — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 00:16:57 PST

"You couldn't relive your life, skipping the awful parts, without losing what made it worthwhile. You had to accept it as a whole--like the world, or the person you loved."

Stewart O'Nan is always a pleasure to read because he creates characters that feel fully realized. Their interests, flaws, motivations, etc. are fully fleshed out on the page and as a reader you feel intimately acquainted with them by the end of the story. I was looking forward to his new book, The Odds which is really more of a novella, because I knew it wouldn't let me down.

And it didn't! It was everything I've come to expect from Stewart O'Nan. It hits pretty close to home for the troubled times, Art and Marion are a couple who have been married for nearly thirty years and due to a series of disastrous financial decisions, mostly relating to their house, they are going to Niagara Falls for one last weekend away, in which they will gamble all they have left in a desperate attempt to get the money they need. They don't really expect to win, though, it's more of a decision made to ensure their actual plans of filing for bankruptcy and divorcing. But it's not just their finances that are in ruins, their marriage is as well. They are both going into the weekend in different ways...Marion is looking at is a good-bye, while Art hopes to make some real memories and share some special times.

Their marriage has problems for legitimate reasons and those become apparent as the story progresses. At first, you just know certain things happened and those things were big and destructive. But as Marion and Art come into sharper focus, so do their pasts. And the way each is dealt with is representative of who they are, Art cheated and it was something that impacted them both, information they shared and tried to deal with. Marion cheated later, and she keeps is a secret out of obligation. Art's destroys them on the surface, but Marion's wreaks its own damage underneath the exterior.

The setting of Niagara Falls was interesting. I have never been there. Now, I never want to go. It sounds like Vegas except with pretty waterfalls. But in this gaudy over the top place, Marion and Art come to learn new things about each other as they gamble away their savings and make one last ditch effort to save themselves. Each chapter begins with an odd, but you know the biggest thing at stake is Art and Marion and their relationship.

Beautifully written and reflective.

Rating: 4.25/5
Things You Might Want to Know: Some sex
Source of Book: Received from publisher for review
Publisher: Viking, Penguin

Review: Still: Notes on a Mid-Faith Crisis by Lauren F. Winner

mypalamy@gmail.com — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 00:00:20 PST

When the joy and intensity of conversion wears off, what's next? What if after spending years believing in God, you suddenly find yourself up against a wall wondering if God does in fact exist? Life comes in three stages, right? Beginning, middle, and end, what's in the middle?

These are some of the things Lauren Winner addresses in her new book. I'm having a hard time formulating thoughts, because the book is more a collection of loosely related anecdotes about the journey in the middle of faith than a straightforward narrative. It's a lovely book, though, beautiful, compulsively readable, moving, unflinchingly honest. It's given me a lot to think about, and inspired me in some small ways which..I don't know whenever something inspires me lately it feels like a miracle.

Let me tell part of what I love about this book. Lauren Winner is an academic and a bookworm. There is no journey here that is separate from being a reader which is something I really related to. She derives a lot of inspiration and comfort from poets and authors and their journeys and what they've put down on paper for the ages. So you find in this book, Anne Sexton and Emily Dickinson and Jane Smiley and John Updike. She also finds meaning out of seemingly small moments in life, which I often do as well. She takes things in and mulls them over. As she's searching for the "what next" she tries different things. I really appreciated all of that.

The life of faith is not an easy one, but for whatever reason it is something that is hard to give up. I don't even know how to explain this since faith has always been there present in my life. And for a lot of people, in the beginning, when you first decide this is something you want to do, or you first find yourself believing that God is a lot more real than you ever thought he was before, it's exciting and there's a lot of joy. And you do things because you want to and there's like this hunger inside to lives this life of faith, to press close to God, to know his people. But that can't last forever, and eventually life rears its ugly head and things are hard, and you're left wondering if God is really real or all those things you once believed so fervently are true. Sometimes it happens with one big thing or maybe it's a gradual wearing away. And for Winner it was a combination of things but I think a lot of it was her divorce. Divorce is so frowned upon in Christian circles, marriage is seen as so sacred. So...getting a divorce would be a huge thing, I think, for a Christian, and especially someone like Winner who is a public Christian in many ways.

The book is divided into three sections kind of loosely based around the wall, movement, and presence. The second section where she sort of focuses on a Lent period in her life is where she also discusses the hiddeness of God in great length. I related to this part a lot. One of the things she talks a lot about is how good it is to go to church. And it made me feel really sad because I know this is true. But I haven't really been a part of a church for a long time, and I know it's problematic, but I have a problematic situation. I grew up in an evangelical church and I liked it. I like the style of worship, the kind of fellowship. I like the freedom in the service, I like wearing my jeans to church, heck I LOVE house based churches where the most significant meetings are held in living rooms, and it's impossible not to get close and talk for hours and deeply with the other people in your church. I don't really do superficial all that well. And yet, at the same time, I'm becoming increasingly liberal in both my politics and my theology. I often feel suffocated in churches when I visit now, either suffocated or bored. (which she also addresses) So many of the churches I visit have sort of bubble gum happy sermons and worship music and it's exhausting for me to concentrate. And before you start preaching at me, I know it's selfish. I know that part of going to church is setting aside self and I know that genuine relationships with people I wouldn't necessarily befriend otherwise is all part of community. And I miss it, I really do. I miss that sort of hard earned, heart breaking intimacy of truly sharing your life with a group of people thread together only by your shared desire to love God. But I feel like the churches I visit don't even allow for that sort of thing, everything is a smooth and polished surface and I don't know how to break through. And I don't know what to do with my anger over certain issues either, it flashes up so fast when things like homosexuality come up and I don't know how to be a part of a people with a heritage of hate. So while I was reading Still, I thought, she's so right, church is important and it's good to go to church and I should start all over again looking for a church. Who knows, maybe I will! I know that I am robbing myself and that it is hindering me in my spiritual life to stay away.

The boredom thing really got me too, because it's also true. I used to love theology. Like I loved discussing it and reading about it and I hungered for more, and now I can barely be interesting. Every once in awhile I'll look at the blogs in my google reader for example and find an article or two to read, but for the most part I find myself apathetic. And like I said, church services themselves bore me.

But it's not all negative! The last section she talks about moving towards something, new sort of remaking your faith in a new way. And I really really loved this part, especially the chapter on cooking and baking because it was kind of profound. But there's a coming to peace, with the unknown and the uncertainties and finding a way forward in a new kind of faith.

The book is lovely and for anyone who has ever wondered what exactly is going on in their spiritual lives, it's an invitation to consider many things. I recommend it!

Rating: 4.5/5
Source of Book: Received for Review
Publisher: HarperOne

CFBA Book Spotlight: Ruth's Redemption by Marlene Banks

mypalamy@gmail.com — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 15:39:14 PST

About the Book: Set in the 1800s, Ruth's Redemption, is an unusual depiction of the lives of slaves and free blacks in pre-Civil War America. Bo, a main character, was educated while a slave. He was given his freedom and now owns a farm buying slaves for the sole purpose of giving them their freedom.

Bo is also a man of God and widower whose life is destined to change when he meets the proud and hard-hearted slave girl, Ruth. Ruth has known nothing but servitude and brutality since being separated from her mother at age thirteen. Purchased and sold primarily for breeding, Ruth struggles to adjust to life outside of bondage. She wants no part of Bo's Godly devotion. Yet Bo is unlike any man she's known and her experiences with him will leave her forever changed.

A gripping slave era novel, Ruth's Redemption is a story of love, forgiveness, and redemption. Set against the backdrop of the Nat Turner Rebellion in Tidewater, Virginia, this novel shines the light of God's unconditional love in the darkness of a culture's cruel socially accepted inhumanity.

Me: I wanted to like this book, but I couldn't get into it after a few chapters.

Review: Irises by Francisco X. Stork

mypalamy@gmail.com — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 00:00:14 PST

"Love is not just what we are obligated to do. It is not just what we have to do. Love is also what we want to do. It is what we have to do and what we want to do with all the power of our being."

The start of 2012 found me in Kentucky helping my grandma sort through and pack up her belongings. It was an emotionally intense week and I was reading The Beautiful and Damned which was a book that required me to concentrate more than I usually do when I read, and on top of that I was having trouble sleeping. One night I finally got to sleep and immediately began to dream about Anthony and Gloria. Thankfully, I managed to somehow wake myself up from this nightmare and decided instantly I needed to start another book. I chose Irises thinking that it would be a good change of pace. This was a faulty assumption in many ways, because while The Beautiful and Damned was requiring brain power, Irises engaged my heart and emotions in a powerful way. I fell deeply into the book, and did not feel like I was exactly getting any recreational break in my reading!

Irises is about two sisters, Kate and Mary, whose father dies and leaves them in an uncertain predicament. Their mother is in a permanent vegetative state and requires a lot of care. Kate has dreams about her future that might be coming true but they hang in the balance with their uncertain future. Her boyfriend wants her to marry him, Mary will still be in high school, and there's no money. Adding to their stresses, their father was a minister and the church needs them to move out of the parsonage so that the new pastor can move in.

Both Kate and Mary are well defined characters. I felt like I knew who they were early on in my reading, Mary is the sensitive sister who is also an artist...and also the sister more likely to subjugate her own desires for her family. Very early in the book, for example, she has to miss a trip to the museum for her sister. And Kate kind of takes it for granted, not realizing it's one of the few things Mary finds joy in. And Kate is the more ambitious older sister, who is sort of rebelling against what the people in her world want for her. She's driven and desperate to leave behind the town she grew up in. And I have to say about a third of the way through the book, I really loved Mary and felt annoyed by Kate, but then I read this thought provoking blog post about female image and identity by Julie Clawson that made me rethink how I was reacting to Mary and Kate. But I also think this is something Stork wants the reader to consider as well, because as the story progresses Kate wrestles with whether or not wanting something for herself is being selfish and just how she can make the right decisions out of love.

Before he passes away, her father talks to her and tells her that he wanted her to be strong but that he's now worried he took it too far and that while she can withstand the blows life may throw her, what cost will it come at for her? He's worried about her soul, but he reminds her that love makes everything that is heavy light. He's not as worried about Mary, and Kate agrees with him, because it seems that faith was in Mary's blood. This conversation sets the stage for the journey Kate goes on through this book, and she returns many times to puzzle over the things her father said to her.

Kate has been in a long term relationship, but she's drawn to the new minister. He's young, handsome, and charismatic. The first sermon he gives after her father passes away is about truth and how he always promises to tell them truth. He goes on to say that to love is to sacrifice. Kate feels this sermon land on her which was one of my favorite parts because this isn't Christian fiction! "Kate remained very still. She saw Reverend Soto's eyes fall on her again, and for a moment she felt as if he had spoken directly to her, as if the whole sermon had been meant for her, urging acceptance of a truth that was unlike any truth she had ever heard." And it was like an instant change for Kate like it would be in Christian fiction, but she pulls this sermon in and begins to engage with this idea. So things are happening, Kate's boyfriend wants to marry her, but she's not sure she wants that at all and their aunt is visiting and pushing for them to get things worked out and refusing to stay with them. And Kate's been accepted to Stanford but she has to decide how she's going to go when their mother's care is such a huge burden on them. And that's when she starts to think that maybe they should let their mother go. But this is a decision she can't make on her own, and so she brings it to Mary.

And Mary is stuck, she can't paint since her mother's accident because she can no longer see the light in people in order to paint them, so she's lost the thing that makes her happiest. And she desperately wants to hold her family together and she's searching out solutions on her own for what can be done. And it's easy to feel super sympathetic towards her, she's younger and less in control in her life and artsy and I feel like her best friend Renata is the built-in cheerleader for her. Which is good because Kate DOES overlook her needs. One of the things I think is well done is how Mary is the one who finds her father, and lets his soul go. She knows what needs to be done, but the actual letting go is so hard. But Mary's willingness to hold on or to sacrifice her own desires for her mother are not necessarily framed as the best thing. And she also strikes up a friendship with a boy that sets a really nice contrast to the decisions she has to make herself. Between Mary holding on and suppressing her own wishes and Kate trying to figure out how to fulfill her own desires you have the perfect story for exploring what love really is.

So you have these two stories going on at the same time about these two sisters and how they are trying to figure out what to do about their futures and they are wrestling with the ideas of what's expected from them and what they actually want and need. And the book, in my opinion, does a really great job of probing into these questions about love and sacrifice and what makes someone selfish. Is there a way to love someone and do what's best for them and yourself at the same time when those things feel completely at odds? And there's also, of course, the idea of letting go and moving on and doing really hard things to give yourself freedom. And the conclusion friends, is very moving and freeing and beautiful and I cried. I loved this book a stinking lot. It's a beautiful story about finding hope and love in even in difficult and painful circumstances.

I should add this link to this post by the editor because she talks about some of the other things that might be interesting to some of you such as writing across identity and economic diversity in YA.

Rating: 4.75 (for structure, characters, themes, execution, pacing, etc. I want to give it 5 but the prose was a little choppy and at times distracting)
Things You Might Want to Know: Maybe a brief description of sex
Source of Book: ARC requested for review when I found out they were pastor's daughters
Publisher: Arthur A. Levine (Scholastic)

The Sunday Salon, With a Brief Mention of Books

mypalamy@gmail.com — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 09:58:24 PST

So Google has a new privacy policy (I know because I have so many gmail accounts that forward into my blogging account and so I got like 10 emails all at once) which I think is probably a mess and something I should be angry about, but I don't really understand it. My biggest thing is that I don't mind, I guess, if my google accounts are associated with my email account, but I do mind if my online/blogging and personal email accounts are in any way linked together. Also I don't want the whole world to know all my details. Please tell me what I should be doing! Google has lost their sparkle and shine, I have to say, with the unwelcome changes they made to Reader, moving picnik over to google plus, etc. I'm not happy. :( And unfortunately, I use so many google products between email, Reader, blogger, and chrome is my favorite browser right now. Sigh.

Apparently there was drama about bloggers being at ALA? This totally passed me by, I just saw a few random mentions on Twitter. Can anyone tell me what happened? I was thinking of going to some parts of ALA in June, but if it's an issue I just want to know!

Books
Reading has not been working out for me this week, sadly. I'm still reading the same book I was reading last week, which is a sign that I don't really like it. Unfortunately, it's for a blog tour I signed up for in a moment of weakness last year. I did start another book alongside, which is kind of fun, Spin by Catherine McKenzie. Hopefully I'll finish up this obligatory read so I can enjoy my reading life again! I am definitely off the blog tour thing for good now.

TV--Lots of Stuff, Brace Yourselves
Switched at Birth--I really liked the show again this week, I'm surprised to be honest at how I consistently enjoy it. I think it got off to an uneven start but ever since it found it's footing towards the end of the first run of episodes it's been fantastic. I guess it was slightly irritating that Bay and Daphne were trying to save Emmett's motorcycle while he was doing absolutely nothing, but I see the purpose behind it..to force Daphne and Bay to deal with some of their issues. And I thought it was understandable that Daphne would act on the temptation of having money around, even using the excuse of losing her hearing aids and fully believing it was for a good cause. Accidentally sending the text to her mom instead of Emmett was a nice touch, because I've totally done that--sent texts to the wrong person, even the person I was talking about, argh. The scene where she had to tell Kathryn what she'd done and Kathryn said, "I thought we could trust you." and Daphne realized what exactly she'd lost felt so heartbreaking and true. It is a hard moment growing up when you do something crappy and lose the trust of the adults in your life, but it's also a big part of growing up and deciding who you are. And...like something I think is interesting but I'm not sure if it's intentional on the part of the show is the way Kathryn reacted to Bay and blamed her for Daphne's behavior, thinking Daphne would never do that. Which of course, Daphne did exactly what she was accused of and thought of it on her own. And I wonder if there's a little bit of saintliness the Kennish's have attached to Daphne, because she's hearing impaired and has "overcome" so much in their minds that surely she would never do these sorts of horrible things that can be just normal teen behavior. They are used to Bay being like that, but not Daphne. I don't know it's just interesting.

And the conversation between Daphne and Bay, where Daphne opened up a bit and shared about what Emmett's motorcyle had meant to them both was a really nice scene. I love the scenes between the two girls best. I was also glad that Daphne told Emmett to take Bay out on the bike..it was nice and I hope that maybe she'll back down especially since maybe she'll reconsider Wilke? Fingers crossed! I didn't really care about Toby and Simone, though it's nice they are still trying to give Toby a storyline of his own! And while it's a much smaller arc, I think they've been doing a really great job with Kathryn and her attempts to break out and become her own person and not hide in the shadow of her husband and family. Choosing the lawyer was a great step in that direction. But the scene of the week for me was at the end, when Angelo told Regina that he understood why she'd done what she did and she broke down with the relief of finally being able to share the weight of that burden and be understood. I could really feel that emotion, it was great. But...it also led to her and Angelo sort of um, getting together again which I don't think is necessarily the wisest choice at the moment. After all, Regina did say it wasn't so much that Daphne had said yes to Angelo, as she was just tired of saying no. Clearly I have a lot to say about this show, maybe I should just start recapping it.

Alcatraz
I liked this episode as well, though I guess it was more about establishing some background on Soto than really advancing the mythology which is understandable I guess? I'm not exactly sure how big the mystery really is and so they'll probably tease it forever, ugh. It's okay though, I like the mood and feel and of the show and the actors. Also, it amuses me that both this show and Once Upon a Time rely on a dual narrative, and neither are anywhere as compelling as LOST was. Sigh.

Downton Abbey
I'm watching season two at the pace it airs on PBS, and while I really liked the first three episodes, I felt a bit bored during the fourth. I really don't care about Bates, I hate Branson, and I just want Matthew and Mary to be together, okay? Also, I'm feeling really bad for Daisy being pushed on William when she doesn't love him. Sad times!

Gossip Girl
This past week's episode was lots of fun with Blair's bachelorette party and Dan pulling a Cyrano de Bergerac writing her vows, and the continuation of Serena's story line which I've already written way too much about and I'm probably one of the only people kind of looking forward to the 100th episode this week. I want it to be pure ridiculous goodness. Since they are supposed to be referencing the pilot a lot, I rewatched it and then it kind of depressed me because the show has declined so much in quality. Also Chuck was SO disgusting in the pilot, it's unbelievable to me that they went on to make him one of their biggest romantic leads. Ugh.

White Collar and Grimm
I started watching White Collar on Netflix but I'm not sure I'll continue. I thought the pilot was good but then it's quickly fallen into the land of the formulaic. Why are good TV shows so hard to come by? :( Also, I finally watched the pilot for Grimm and it was pretty silly, but I'm going to watch a few more episodes anyway. I like the slightly darker edge it has.

Stuff in Development--Seeing what the networks are ordering to pilot at the moment is depressing me. There are two Beauty and the Beasts--one at the CW and one at ABC and the one at the CW is supposed to have a "procedural twist" Nothing makes me want to bang my head against the wall like that! The CW also ordered The Carrie Diaries but my hopes for it are slim since I'm the only person I know that would be willing to watch it. And everyday another stupid comedy or procedural is announced. I mean I think I heard about one yesterday that is based on Groupon. Are they serious with this?

Film
So the Academy Award nominations were announced, and naturally I'm hoping Tree of Life wins, though I did really love Moneyball. Neither are terribly female friendly. I do want to see some of the other films on the list and hope to soon!

I also watched Cowboys & Aliens this week and kept falling asleep. And I finally watched Paranormal Activity 3! I don't care, guilty pleasure, etc. etc. I still liked this one! I keep expecting not to, but I think this one might be the scariest yet, and the ending was SO freaky beyond the first two. Are they done with them now? I mean I don't really know what other stories there are left to tell, to be honest. By the way, the guy that created Paranormal Activity also helped create The River that new show that's going to be on soon. I caught the pilot at Comic-Con and while it's a bit out there I think it has potential. I like the aura of mystery around it. Ugh, I'm still waiting for that next great show with an amazing mythology and characters I love to death.

Okay so I hope you all have some answers to my questions! And I hope you had a wonderful week! :)

The Growing Relationship Between Books and Television

mypalamy@gmail.com — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 01:12:08 PST

At the beginning of the year, Laura Miller wrote at Salon that "The novel and television are commingling as never before. And it’s about time."

She went on to discuss the latest acquisitions being made and the way in which several literary novels are being adapted to television. It's exciting in many ways, as TV has the potential "to spread out and explore the byways and textures of a novel’s imagined world." TV makes a better fit for book adaptations than film, she argues, and in many ways I agree. I think the trend towards books like The Corrections and Faulkner's works is fascinating and feels like new ground in a lot of ways. I love books and TV best, as you know, they sometimes war in my heart for which I love more and the complementary nature of this growing world appeals to me in many ways.

But...I don't actually like many of the shows that have been adapted from books I love. The first example that springs to mind is Rizzoli and Isles. In some ways, I actually resent the show for not being everything I hoped it would be. I don't mean to be a stickler about screen adaptations never living up to the books, but there are certain elements I certainly hope to find present in a show that is based on characters I love. I guess, at minimum, I hope to find the heart of the characters and the defining characteristics of their relationships to be adhered to. Certainly I recognize that TV is entirely different from novels--new storylines will open up and things will change the characters in fundamental ways, but I want to think that a show will start out in a place that feels true to the heart of the books. And that was absolutely not the case with Rizzoli and Isles. I love the characters in the books to death, they are both incredibly intelligent, hard working women who have a layered and complex working relationship. The show decided to go for a silly, over the top, BFF vibe. It's not that the show isn't fun, I'm sure it's fun for a lot of people. It's just that I look at the source material and then I look at the show, and think...this was the best you could do?

Even book-to-TV factory Alloy adaptations let me down. The Lying Game completely abandoned the premise of the books and as a result the title makes no sense, since the actual Lying Games never feature into the story!

But even more interesting to me is the forthcoming The Corrections since Franzen himself is writing on it. The book is ten years old! And now he's being given a chance to go back to the book and revisit the characters and stories. It's almost like being given a second chance on the story itself. It will be interesting to see how it does and what he chooses to do with the opportunity. Miller also raises some interesting questions about how Franzen's adaptation of The Corrections will have a status any other person's adaptation wouldn't.

Despite the exciting opportunities being presented by adapting books to television series, there is still much to consider as a reader. Could we eventually lose something with this new phenomenon? I have to admit that A-J Aronstein's recent essay at The Millions on this subject is one of my favorite things I've read on the internet in ages and explores this question with depth.

What can I say? The brain is sometimes lazy. It conjures approximations of Mr. Darcy, or Daisy Buchanan, or Chip Lambert based on people we know. We try to understand a novel in the vernacular of our own experience. Our relationships condition our mental, emotional, and psychological connection with characters. And when we say that literary fiction is “character-driven,” we mean this: our private interactions with texts depend as much on the associations and imagination of the author as on the associations and imaginations of the reader. Our desire to know them — and to know them on our own terms — drives us to read.

When books are adapted to the screen, we begin to lose bits of what made those stories our own and the ways they were grounded in our own experience. A whole new ingredient has been added into the mix, or an intermediary if you will. We aren't directly engaging with the text, we are engaging with someone else's interpretation of it. But because of the ties they hold to the novel, names, locations, plot details, they have the potential to interfere with our own memories of the experience of the book or the world we found inside the pages.

It's an exciting world to be sure, and I still think there are a lot of books that would make great television series. But I also think wholly original content on TV can be just as fulfilling and work to the advantages of the medium.

How do you feel about the growing trend in adapting works of literary fiction for television?

Books on TV: Gossip Girl and The Beautiful and Damned (AKA Really Long Thoughts on Serena's Arc)

mypalamy@gmail.com — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 23:42:17 PST

"Beautiful things grow to a certain height and then they fail and fade off," Serena van der Woodsen quotes to a movie director in Gossip Girl's fourth season finale. "I relate to it more than I should admit," she adds. The quote is from F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Beautiful and Damned and Serena meets the director, David O. Russell, after a chance encounter with his assistant who was reading the book on the beach. When a book is given such prominence in a show, it's worthwhile to consider what exactly the writers are trying to convey by giving it screen time. This wasn't the first time The Beautiful and Damned made an appearance in the show, earlier in the same season Serena gifted it to her professor/love interest and told him it was her favorite book.

I decided to read the book to see if it could give me any insight to the way the writers think about the character of Serena. For anyone who doesn't watch the show, Serena is sort of the it-girl of the story, beautiful and desirable, things generally fall into her lap. But she lacks direction, is often guided by her impulses in the moment, and is constantly trying to remake herself and become a better person. Of course she is given a background that explains her behavior, her mother was neglectful, her father abandoned her, and she's often been objectified by men.

I'm glad I read the book, because I can see how Gloria Gilbert guided the characterization of Serena in season 4. The above quote is Gloria's, she says it to Anthony when they are looking at old buildings and Gloria is oddly offended by the idea of preservation. The full quote is: "Beautiful things grow to a certain height and then they fail and fade off, breathing out memories as they decay. And just as any period decays in our minds, the things of that period should decay too, and in that way they're preserved for a while in the few hearts like mine that react to them. Trying to preserve a century by keeping its relics up to date is like keeping a dying man alive by stimulants" It's fitting that Gloria in the novel, whose entire sense of self worth revolves around her beauty, would take issue with the attempt to preserve the fleeting and the temporal. She later says in this same section, "there's no beauty without poignancy" and it later bears out when they leave their honeymoon behind, she weeps over the fact that nothing can ever be repeated, and will never quite be the same again. Beauty by its very nature is transient, and since Fitzgerald casts Gloria as beauty incarnate, this combination of adoration and loss creates an interesting dilemma for Serena.

Serena as Gloria Gilbert

At the beginning of Season Four of Gossip Girl, Serena and Blair are vacationing in Paris. Serena is having the time of her life, having left behind a complicated relationship situation where she was torn between two boys, she's seeing many men, living in the moment ("home doesn't exist until we're there" she tells Blair at one point) and Gossip Girl herself even declares her "a muse to us all." This is Serena at the height of her Gloria Gilbert characterization, living in the moment, indulging in the pressing passion of the now, and captivating the people around her with her beauty and her presence. In The Beautiful and Damned, Fitzgerald describes this mentality as Gloria at her normal state of mind, "existing each day for each day's worth."

It's not only the way Serena herself lives, though, but the way people react to her. There has never been a time when Serena fancied a boy she couldn't have, and at the beginning of the fourth season she feels she must decide between two boys, Dan Humphrey--her first real boyfriend of the past, and Nate Archibald, the golden boy and friend since childhood. When she returns home, both boys have made attempts to move on thus delaying her choice. When they talk about her, it's almost as if she's an addiction they can't shake, and they strike an agreement to not have anything to do with her (purportedly to preserve their friendship). But when tough times hit Dan, he seeks Serena out as an escape, she represents a kind of idealization of the past for him, a sense of things being easy and free from emotional complications. The same holds true for Nate, after being emotionally manipulated by another girl, he shows up at Serena's doorstep in hopes of rekindling their relationship. Both of these relationships had ended for legitimate reasons, but Dan and Nate seem to forget them when presented with the idea of Serena. And a third love interest, Colin, feels that after meeting her he's willing to forgo his playboy ways in an effort to get to know Serena better.

The Colin relationship is somewhat puzzling, but I feel it holds some significance outside of it's linear narrative purpose. In the episode before she meets him, Serena declares to Blair that she can't choose between Dan and Nate and that she needs to find someone who can give her what she finds appealing about both men. It would make sense that this would be Colin, who, according to Serena is "handsome in an old Hollywood way and smart." Colin is a self made businessman and unfortunately, also Serena's professor. They decide to get to know each other outside of a romantic relationship while he's her professor and Serena gives him a copy of The Beautiful and Damned which he amazingly reads in like one day. (so unfair it took me a week!) In the original script for episode 4x07*, Colin was supposed to quote a passage about Gloria and say that it reminded him of Serena. The episode was changed to make his reference much more subtle and generic, but I think that we can believe that even though Colin might represent the ideal partner for Serena, he still viewed her as Gloria Gilbert. The passage from which Colin's favorite quote is meant to have come from: "...she moved him as he had never been moved before. The sheath that held her soul had assumed significance--that was all. She was a sun, radiant, growing, gathering light and storing it--then after an eternity pouring it forth in a glance, the fragment of a sentence, to that part of him that cherished all beauty and all illusion."

Irrelevancy

I guess all of this begs the question, why did the writers choose The Beautiful and Damned as a framework for Serena's character? The story of Gloria Gilbert is depressing and slightly outdated. Her relationship with Anthony more closely resembles Blair's relationship with Chuck than any relationship Serena has had. Personally, I think it's tied to the label Gossip Girl gave Serena at the end of season 2--irrelevant. Gossip Girl labelled Serena this way because her status as the it-girl in high school was coming to an end. On top of that, Gossip Girl herself gave Serena her relevancy--thus creating a complicated relationship between the two.

When Serena is first slapped with this label, she reacts badly. She attempts to take Gossip Girl down and fails. After all, if Serena can get rid of Gossip Girl, she is getting rid of the person who controls the narrative about her relevancy. It's also interesting that in this episode, Dan seems to think that perhaps their friendship might be over, feeding into Serena's insecurities about how she matters.

This is not unlike Gloria. Gloria is loved for her beauty, and dreads growing old. When she goes out for a part in a movie, she is at first encouraged but then rejected. She does not receive the lead role, but rather a smaller part, she is cast aside, her beauty is no longer opening the doors for her that it once did. I think this is at the root of Serena's insecurity--she is aware that she is known and often loved for things that are fleeting, and that the real Serena is overlooked or unknown.

In episode 4x19, she hits her lowest point on the irrelevancy scale when she discovers that Dan and Blair have formed a secret friendship and have become so close that they consider they might have romantic feelings for one another. She is angry and hurt, but Blair strikes at her deepest fears when she says that she shares a connection with Dan where they do things they could never do with her. Serena has suddenly become irrelevant to a relationship her two best friends share.

This drives her to make a decision in 4x22 to choose herself, which is the first step in developing a Serena beyond Gloria Gilbert. Her chance encounter on the beach centered around The Beautiful and Damned gives voice to her awareness of the limiting value of the superficial and it launches her into a career that gives her a chance to develop purpose.

Season Five--Taking Control of the Narrative

5x01 opens with Serena happily working her production job in Los Angeles as the filming for The Beautiful and Damned wraps up. She loves her job, she's eager to take on more work, and let her own ideas be known. But when a co-worker tries to sabotage her job, she's once again confronted with the existing narrative about Serena van der Woodsen, when he bitterly says to her, "So it looks like things really do come easy for Serena van der Woodsen, just like I heard." This prompts Serena to take responsibility and ownership of her actions. But, interestingly enough, The Beautiful and Damned also makes an appearance in this episode. The episode opens with a shot of the film Serena has been working on all summer. Anthony holds Gloria and declares "you're such a swan in this light." In the book, I feel this is another passage about the elusive nature of beauty, but I'm going to be rebellious and say that in the show it's about the transformation of Serena van der Woodsen.

Serena again butts heads with someone else's narrative about her life in 5x04. Her ex-boyfriend/step-brother/good friend Dan wrote a book about all of his friends and in this season's most fun episode to date, the book is released. Serena has served as a muse to Dan in the past, and fully expects that she will be portrayed well. She feels Dan knows the real her, and if anything she'll simply be put on a bit of a pedestal. But the reaction of her co-workers clues her in to the fact that this is not the case. Instead she feels she's been depicted as selfish, insensitive, and shallow. And while this leads to an emotionally charged scene with Dan where she tells him she always thought he was the only person who saw her for who she really was and who she wanted to be, it's also worth noting that because of Dan's book Serena loses a valuable and highly sought after meeting at work. The existing narrative about her interferes with her job and her own goals.

It's interesting that in 5x06, Serena and Dan's career goals come up against each other. Serena has convinced Dan to sign over the film rights to his book to her as a way of making things up to her boss. But her boss has different ideas about how to use Dan's book than Dan does and Serena ends up sacrificing her job to protect Dan and his reputation. In some ways, it's a precursor to her eventual goal to become a new and improved Gossip Girl. While she makes a sacrifice that's admirable, she also makes the choice on her own about someone else's portrayal. She is, in a sense, controlling the narrative about her friend. Additionally, she also agrees to write her own blog in this episode and tell her own story. Keeping in mind that part of Serena's Gloria Gilbert characterization is based on how others react to her, it's significant that both Jane and Diana express support for Serena being someone other than the current public opinion holds she is.

In 5x07, Serena is now writing her blog, but she doesn't know what to say about herself. Her cousin suggests that if she wants "people to read you, then they need to read about you first." In other words, get Gossip Girl's attention! It puts Serena back to the step one, her relevancy being dependent on Gossip Girl. She agrees, though, and a convoluted plot ensues. Diana suggests to Serena that Gossip Girl is heartless and cruel when a blast comes out that Serena has been stood up on a date, but Serena says it's nothing compared to the past, and the first example she uses is when Gossip Girl called her irrelevant! Diana says they need to work together so that Gossip Girl "loses her readers and their attacks lose their power." Serena declines at first, but when Charlie comes under attack by Gossip Girl, she agrees to help Diana take down Gossip Girl. Charlie also tells Serena she doesn't need to be seen with some guy to define who she is. ♥

One other thing that is kind of interesting to me about 5x07 was the choice to film at Sleep No More. I puzzled over the idea that this was a pivotal episode in the story line of Gossip Girl as an idea until I read a few reviews of the play from friends that went together. They each had an entirely different experience, because there is no one story to be told at Sleep No More. As a backdrop for an episode about confused encounters it works, but it also works as a framework for exploring the idea that there are multiple ways to tell a story and the perceptions and life experiences one brings to a story affect the way it is received. On the show, Gossip Girl generally sends out suggestive blasts with pictures, but could the same gossip have an entirely different impact in someone else's hands? This is the idea Serena engages with as the season progresses, so Sleep No More is actually a really interesting place to launch that part of the story.

Episode 5x10 is when old Gloria Gilbert!Serena begins to battle with new emerging Serena. Serena is confused about where her own story is going and wishes she had a way to look back at where she's been and maybe where she's going. Dan suggests she look back at Gossip Girl blasts to get a sense of things. As she does, feelings for Dan begin to stir within her as she reflects on their relationship. She knows that Dan is in love with Blair, though, and makes no mention of her feelings to him. Even so, when Chuck and Blair are in a car accident believed to be caused by the paparazzi who were alerted by Gossip Girl, Serena decides Gossip Girl has to go down for good...and Nate agrees with her.

In 5x11, with Nate, Serena decides to become the new and improved Gossip Girl after she realizes that it's not just the pictures and secrets that are a problem, but the assumptions that come with them. This is important to me in the progression of her story line this season because you start with Serena reacting and taking ownership over her actions due to what people say about her and in the important mid-season episodes, she's at the point where she now wants to take overall control of the narrative. But...you also have these lingering feelings for Dan that seem to me to based on old Serena, the Serena that looks to what someone else says about her and thinks maybe that part of being Serena is being with a man. I feel like since Serena's feelings were sparked by reading Gossip Girl blasts, her feelings for Dan come from a place where she's insecure about where she's headed. My understanding of her relationship to Gossip Girl thus far is that in order to defeat her label of irrelevancy she needs to come to a place where she no longer depends or cares about what Gossip Girl says about her.

I make no predictions about where this story line will lead, and I wouldn't be surprised if it takes a bit of a backseat to other story for the next run of episodes. And...I don't know I don't relate AT ALL to this idea of being valued for surface beauty and yet the irony is it all feels rather poignant to me, I can't help but sympathize with Serena as she struggles to find worth beyond the worth she has to offer men.

I HOPE that it's relevant that Nate is the one helping Serena forge this new identity even as he works on his own independence. And at the moment, he's certainly doing it out of friendship with no ulterior motives. But I'm slightly nervous it's just going to end up in some big mess where we find out everyone is even more related than we thought.

Coming Up

Next week is Gossip Girl's 100th episode and several weeks ago a video leaked of a dream sequence Serena will have. In the dream, she sees herself as Marilyn Monroe singing "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend." I feel like the song is the perfect choice and Marilyn the perfect movie star for Serena to see herself as. The song is about the importance of a girl securing a future for herself before her looks fade and in so many ways that seems like what Serena is battling towards this season. And yet, she's distracted by the fact that she has lost Dan's attention to Blair. My loose Serena-centric interpretation of this dream is that Serena is battling to be herself and yet she's not quite there yet, she still hasn't fully let go of the idea that Dan's/men's attention is important. And yet she realizes that Dan is interested in a girl who in the past would never have been a threat, a girl known for her smarts and incidentally, Serena's best friend.

*totally useless bit of information, but Marilyn Monroe was married for a time to Arthur Miller who described her this way: "She was a whirling light to me then, all paradox and enticing mystery, street-tough one moment, then lifted by a lyrical and poetic sensitivity that few retain past early adolescence" After all the Gloria Gilbert as light talk I waded through in The Beautiful and Damned I have to admit that I thought Marilyn was an excellent choice for Serena's dream. (along with the obvious--blond sex symbol reputation!)

*Gossip Girl had a huge script leak problem last season which is the only reason I know there were changes from script to screen in episode 7.

Thoughts on The Beautiful and Damned by F. Scott Fitzgerald

mypalamy@gmail.com — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 00:34:55 PST

When I was in high school, they split up our junior year (mostly American lit) reading between classes--one class read The Great Gatsby and one class, my class, read The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. I was slightly bummed at the time because I remember my sister loved The Great Gatsby and at the time, of course, I still idolized my older siblings, but I ended up loving Huck Finn. (there is a probably a life metaphor in there somewhere) I never took the initiative to read The Great Gatsby on my own, but now years later, I have finally read F. Scott Fitzgerald! I read The Beautiful and Damned and it was not necessarily a fun read, but I guess I'm glad I read it since he is considered to be such a great American novelist, etc. The setting for the book is the 1920's? But the book was published in 1922 so maybe a bit before that, the war in the book is the first world war.

The Beautiful and Damned is primarily Anthony Patch's story and he is in no way a likable protagonist, there was nothing redeeming about him really, but obviously that wasn't the point. Anthony Patch has enough money to get by, certainly, but what he really wants is his grandfather's inheritance, so he's basically waiting throughout the entire book for his grandfather to die, so he can have this unlimited amount of money to squander on the pursuit of pleasure. He meets Gloria Gilbert, and thinks he falls in love with her. Gloria is beautiful, like the most beautiful girl ever (of course) and Anthony must have her! So when she sort of turns him down at one point, he gets very childish and pretends he doesn't know her for like five weeks in order to make her see the error of her ways...and that's pretty much the story of their relationship. It's hard to believe they really love each other, but rather the idea of each other and the idea that they are young and beautiful and indulging in their greatest passions. But the reality of their relationship is ugly. Gloria clings to the sentimentality of it and Anthony essentially hates her and the hold she has over him, so he's manipulative and abusive and it's just not a lot of fun to read?

The book is divided into three sections, the first section being about how Anthony and Gloria meet, fall in love, and get married, the second section is about how their marriage slowly begins to dissolve, and the third section is pretty much about their utter destruction. I feel like the story meanders in some places, I hit the halfway mark and almost gave up. But even so, it's kind of a depressing look at desire. I mean ultimately I feel like it's the satiation of desire in the moment that both characters live for and that ultimately destroys them.

Anthony's feelings for Gloria are largely centered around his desire to possess her. "He was not so much in love with Gloria, but mad for her." She is the one thing he really wants in the beginning of the novel and for awhile she remains out of reach for him. An old family friend is also interested in her and that drives Anthony mad with jealousy, but eventually he...wins? And marries Gloria. And it's good times at first, they go on their honeymoon, and rent a house and they are happy and indulging all their inner passions. Only they have serious problems and those come out in the a scene that made me think, "why am I reading this book?"

Fitzgerald prefaces the scene with saying it was an incident that stole Gloria's brightness or whatever, but really it was just Anthony being abusive. They were out with friends and Gloria wants to leave but Anthony doesn't and he's annoyed by her insistence that they need to leave. And they argue about whether or not he's drunk, and then comes this gem: "In his mind was but one idea--that Gloria was being selfish, that she was always being selfish and would continue to be unless here and now he asserted himself as her master." They fight and Gloria is miserable, but Anthony thinks, "Ah she might hate him now, but afterward she would admire him for his dominance." It's just really gross, but it does take place approximately halfway through the novel and signifies the turning point in their relationship...things are never quite the same again, while they might find temporary reprieves, whatever trust Gloria had in Anthony is shattered in a way that can never really be repaired. The closest she comes to feeling things for him again is when he goes to war and she's writing him letters overcome with sentiment.

But nothing seems to stop Anthony and he continues to work his way to his own destruction. He goes to train in the army for war and self sabotages the opportunities he has there, strikes up an affair with a local girl, and continues to drink. He neglects Gloria until it becomes clear she might be forgetting about him at which point he does everything in his power to try fix things. And that's pretty much the story of Anthony Patch. He doesn't want anything until it's out of reach and then he wants it desperately. He even says at one point, (to the girl he's having an affair with for crying out loud!) "Things are sweeter when they're lost. I know--because once I wanted something and got it. It was the only thing I ever wanted badly, Dot. And when I got it, it turned to dust in my hands.*" Honestly that pretty much sums up the story of Anthony's life! He only ever wants what is just out of reach.

Gloria spends the novel preoccupied with her own beauty and its inevitable deterioration. When she thinks at one point in the book she might be pregnant, she's upset over the idea that her body will lose its shape because that is what Anthony loves. She is told again and again how beautiful she is, so when something happens towards the end of the novel to make her feel like she is losing her youth, she's really upset. And there's this weird thing in the beginning I think, where we are supposed to believe that Gloria is beauty itself incarnate.

The book wasn't without humor though, sometimes I did just laugh at how ridiculous Anthony was. He never wants to work and at the beginning of the book he thinks that he wants to be an author, but the very thought of having to sit down and try to pour all his thoughts out is off putting. I mean, I could actually recognize some elements of real human behavior in a funny way through some of these stories. And oh the disdain for the middle class! Anthony would rather be poor or rich than middle class.

Supposedly The Beautiful and Damned is really closely based on F. Scott Fitzgerald and Zelda. If this is true what depressing lives they had and what a jerk Fitzgerald was! But I do think it's an interesting read if you can bare hating the characters and knowing they will make every wrong choice available to them based on their desires in the moment. As you might guess, there's no happy ending in that. And I suppose there's still quite a bit of a cautionary tale in it. Also I was looking at some reviews and I saw someone say the characters are really complex and so is their relationship. And I don't quite agree with that because I felt like I understood everything about their driving motivations and how they related to each other, and I don't know if that's because Fitzgerald painted them so well or if it's just because it all boiled down to selfishness.

I read this book because the show Gossip Girl wove the book into their framework as a reference point for the characterization of Serena. I'm a sucker for shows that do this (hello Lost) and it was actually pretty illuminating. I will talk more about that tomorrow, but don't you think it's fascinating how stories build upon stories and no story exists in isolation? It makes me wish I could read more books and consume more stories, but alas I am only one person, I must rely on others to do a lot of it for me!

Rating: ha ha how do you rate a classic? like this 4/5
Source of Book: Bought it
Publisher: Signet Classics
*Okay so this reminded me of a line in a Cure song, "A Letter to Elise" so I looked up the song just for fun and discovered is actually does have literary influence in the form of Letters to Felice by Kafka!

The Sunday Salon -- I ain't changed but I know I ain't the same

mypalamy@gmail.com — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 01:00:04 PST

Hey guys happy start to a new week!

This week I went to the Book Warehouse for the last time. This is the second time I've watched a store that sells remaindered books go out of business in the last couple of years and they always mark the books down to a dollar. And THERE ARE STILL SO MANY GREAT BOOKS LEFT! It's really surprising to me, but then again, it's pretty hard to stock up on books. Especially these days with how slow I'm reading, but the temptation is big and of course I got some.

The National Book Critic Circle Awards finalists were announced and in keeping with my stellar track record, I've read none of them! In more exciting news, the Newbery, Caldecott, and Printz awards will be announced on Monday and you can watch it all via webcast. And the Edgar nominees were also announced! An exciting time for book awards, I guess.

In other fun book news, Fyrefly is offering her great spreadsheet for tracking your reading again, Ana offers an annotated reading list of ladies in comics, and there's going to be a Jane Eyre board book, which might be the coolest thing ever.

TV

Alcatraz--I liked this. I think a lot of the appeal is the lead, she's fun and cute (and female which is always a plus with me). The mysteries of the prisoners might become a bit formulaic? But with the longer ongoing mystery, I think it has potential. Jorge Garcia is pretty much playing the same character he played on LOST, and Michael Giacchino scored the pilot beautifully, too bad he's not doing the rest of the show. I feel like both episodes they showed ended with good surprises, so I don't know I'm willing to stick with it awhile. Also you know, with so much of the LOST team involved it's hard for me not to want it to be great.

Switched at Birth--I loved this episode, toooo! It's always a good sign when a show is willing to bring things back and have consequences to actions, and also I just kind of love that they don't shy away from things like the fact that yes, sometimes Emmett hates hearing people or that Daphne might run up against being used for her "disability". And...I don't know I think it's just kind of amazing that Daphne was able to determine the root of her problem being with her dad and facing him. But the real winning scene to me was the one between Bay and Daphne, I can't imagine a more complicated relationship than theirs. They alone can understand each other, yet at the same time there's just so much resentment between them.

Revenge--I actually thought this was pretty good this week, I was kind of struck by how Emily was kind of facing what she'd given up. When she saw how Jack cared for Amanda, if she'd just come back, with no thought for revenge, that's the life she could have had. Instead, she's stuck in this never ending cycle of destroying people. I thought it was sad when Daniel proposed, though, and told her he could be his true self with her. I guess I'll stick with this one for a little while longer.

Gossip Girl--Ha ha ha, are they serious with this storyline? Okay I have actual serious issues with the way they ripped The End of the Affair for their show, but maybe I'll save those for another time.

Ana pointed me to this great piece on Racialicious about The Vampire Diaries, and it paints a pretty clear picture about the problems with the show. It was eye opening for me, I knew I had vague issues with the show I couldn't exactly define, they are well defined here.

Film

The Ides of March--I liked this a lot actually. I thought it was a clever and interesting look at just how one man's idealism was shattered. And in smaller ways, it was just a convincing look at the lengths people are willing to go to win and how they sort of lose the things that were once important to them.

I also watched Don't Be Afraid of the Dark and Fright Night neither one was great.

Books and Reading

I read Sara Zarr's How to Save a Life this week and it was amazing. Truly a great book, I'm kind of scared to try to review it. I also read Stewart O'Nan's new one, The Odds which was typical O'Nan meaning amazing characterization. Right now I'm reading Legacy of Eden by Nelle Davy which is good as well, except that she makes out every single event in the past to be like the EVENT THAT CHANGED EVERYONE FOREVER.

Enough about me! Tell me what's new with you, what you've read that you loved or if you liked Alcatraz or even just you know, what you had for breakfast.

The Vampire Diaries 3x12: The Ties that Bind and The Secret Circle 1x12: Witness

mypalamy@gmail.com — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 01:21:15 PST

So TVD. I liked this episode for the most part, in that I was pretty entertained throughout. Bonnie's mom is like the worst mother ever, so maybe there's more to that story. I don't know, I guess she wasn't apologetic enough for me. I liked the scene where Bonnie told her about Grams, though, I thought it was played perfectly, Bonnie's grief still so big, yet she managed to contain that big huge story in just a few lines and her eyes..I don't know I thought it was good.

Caroline was there for what..two lines? I thought it was brave of Tyler to ask her father for his help, knowing what he did to her before. And having to turn so much is bound to be painful for him. I guess I just feel like this Tyler as a hybrid story line is still all over the place and not that interesting. Nothing about it has been about Tyler's character or even Caroline's, with the exception of last week, so I don't get it and I don't care. I'm still kind of mad at the writers for doing it in the first place to be honest. Also...like it's SO painful to turn into a werewolf, and if gratitude is what keeps Tyler bound to Klaus, why did Klaus want to be a hybrid in the first place? I can see why werewolves would, but it's interesting that they don't really talk about the appeal of being a werewolf at all, which...there has to be some right?

I have to admit I was laughing a little bit when Elena told Stefan about the kiss...which, she just plucked some wood out from his chest NICE TIMING but it's like...there's all this HUGE stuff going on, but this had equal emotional weight to all of that. I mean I totally understand that this triangle is the focal point of the show and this is a teen drama so of course this stuff seems just as huge, it just felt odd and like too much to me tonight. I really felt for Stefan, though, wow!

Klaus was annoying tonight. Please stop whining about your family and be a majestic kingly vampire instead okay?

And lastly...yay Elijah! That was a GREAT comeback!

The Secret Circle

I really liked this episode! It gave me Harry Potter vibes again, with the flashback to their parents' deaths. I love Jake, I can't help it, and I'm annoyed by it because I ship him with Cassie but the show already told me that ADAM AND CASSIE ARE WRITTEN IN THE STARS. I'm annoyed by how often Melissa gets shipped off to Seattle and how they have no storyline for her anymore, when she's around she's always propping someone else. I hope they fix that. But seriously I liked this episode.

It was pretty sad to see Jake's parents die and that scene where his mom was begging for help was just...perfect and sad. I like that Cassie is trying to figure this stuff out about her father and that we learned some details..i.e. he's still alive! And I like Diana and Adam working together. I thought Faye's story line was pretty interesting, the way she's isolated from the circle which automatically puts her in danger, and I wondered if drug guy could be Cassie's dad? Not sure he's old enough.

Loved Ethan tonight! I thought that was one of the most interesting developments of all, he was such a sad sop before, but he's got a little spark. And I guess the fact that he was on the scene of the fire...maybe he was more drawn to magic then he let on before, maybe it wasn't the deaths of all the people he loved that drove him to drink, but the loss of his magic. He seemed like a whole new person with the crystal. I just thought this episode was really tight, and the Adam and Diana relationship stuff in the middle of it didn't feel ridiculous and out of place like Elena telling Stefan about the kiss did in the Vampire Diaries. I feel like Thomas and Shelley really sell those scenes, and I guess I kind of appreciate how much emotional weight the show puts into their relationship.

There are all these things I really like about the show, I like, for example, that when they needed a shocking death they killed a boy instead of a girl. I like that the cast has more females than males, I like how important the girls friendships are to each other and that you can have really great scenes like the one last week between Diana and Melissa where they talk about how their friendship sort of faded away. I feel like the Adam and Diana relationship is so well handled, and I love that it hasn't been glossed over or tossed aside but that it's a genuine struggle the way those things really are. It doesn't have the same shocking fast moving plot of The Vampire Diaries, but I still love it and look forward to it each week.

And you guys? What did you think?

Review: LoveSick by Jake Coburn

mypalamy@gmail.com — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 00:40:11 PST

I started LoveSick right before the end of the year because I wanted to read a book I was fairly certain would not become a favorite and miss out on my favorite books of the year list. I know it's wrong to head into a book with so much prejudice, but in this case it actually worked because I enjoyed it much much more than I thought I would*.

LoveSick is about two young college students who each have a huge demon they are battling in the form of an addiction. Ted is a recovering alcoholic. His alcoholism led to a drunk driving accident that ruined his life via an injury that would keep him from a basketball scholarship. Erica is a wealthy girl who is battling bulimia. Her father is very controlling and when Erica insists on going to college on her own, he devises a plan to hire someone to keep an eye on her and make sure she doesn't return to binging and purging.

He hires a private consultant who locates Ted and offers to pay his way to college completely in exchange for keeping an eye on Erica. Ideally the situation shouldn't require Ted to do much except look for alarming signs that Erica is relapsing, and in exchange, he'll be able to attend college after all.

I'm pretty sure you can guess where the story is going. Ted goes to school but soon finds himself in a surprising friendship with Erica. And he feels more for her than friendship. He starts to feel guilt ridden about what he's doing. And Erica really likes Ted, too, she likes him more than she's ever liked anyone. After this is established, the story escalates in ways that feel REALLY BIG for the quieter story it felt like before. I guess I can understand the reasoning behind it, but to be honest it was my least favorite part of the book. Still, when you are messing around with big money, bad things are bound to happen.

I really loved the characters in LoveSick I thought both Ted and Erica were well developed and their individual struggles with their addictions fleshed out. The scenes where Erica is binging were just..I don't know described so well. She would carefully plan each second of her activity, from where she would buy her food, to the kind she would get, and the rush she would feel. Even in its nitty gritty horrific details, I could really feel the pull and hold it had over her. And I liked that she had a complicated view of herself, that she struggled with both wanting to be free from the shackles of worrying about how others saw her, to the reality that she wasn't. For example, I loved this part:

"Erica skipped hurriedly past his eyeline and then paused outside the door to the bathroom. She couldn't decide if she was embarrassed by her messy ponytail, or her swollen pores, but she suddenly felt like turning into the bathroom and meticulously inspecting herself." (She spends some time then trying to figure out what to do and talking herself into the fact that only she has a right to judge herself when..."Ten feet from the lounge, Erica realized she'd instinctively refastened her ponytail, and it infuriated her. Reaching again for the elastic, she yanked it from her hair.

Erica continues to meet her therapist from home, but because she doesn't trust him quite yet, or her father, she meets him in online chess games to chat about her life. The therapist is really endearing, but I loved how she described Ted to him at first, and how she didn't want the things Ted had done to be what defined him to anyone else.

DrMTRudas: Then how would you describe the 'real' Ted to me?
ep149846: i don't know...i guess i feel like i can be my alone self with him
DrMTRudas: I think that's a contradiction in terms, Erica.
ep149846: you know how you can't really feel like you know yourself unless you're alone....cause there're a million eyes on your or people telling you what to do or say or think...cause people are like static for the soul
DrMTRudas: I'm following you.
ep149846: well with a real person i can be myself around them...my alone self

I also really liked Ted and his struggle with the morality of what he was doing and his growing feelings for Erica. I never doubted that he wanted the best for Erica, but at the same time this money they were giving him represented his last real chance. His roommate drinks a lot, and Ted is never unaware of the temptation. He even thinks to himself that he could outdrink him, when his roommate looks down on him for not partying like everyone else. His emails with the private consultant who hired him are hilarious and reveal his level of discomfort with what's he's doing.

To be clear, when the truth comes out Ted faces the consequences of his actions. Ted and Erica don't save each other, the narrative holds that change can only happen when the individual is ready. But they do provide friendship and understanding for each other in a time when they don't have it anywhere else.

So while the plot is not all that original, I enjoyed LoveSick for the characters and the realistic depiction of their addictions.

Rating: 4.25/5
Things You Might Want to Know: Profanity
Source of Book: Paperbackswap
Publisher: Speak (Penguin)

*Jake Coburn writes for Gossip Girl and I never like his episodes they often include problematic elements and are sometimes offensive. I do not understand how the person that wrote the LoveSick characters gets the Gossip Girl characters and their issues so wrong though. Also, he's a recovering addict himself according to his website.