My Bottom Smarts

MBS Spanko Brunch #315

2012-01-28T06:00:00.000-08:00

Welcome, my friends, to the latest in our continuing series of community conversations. Our topic this week was inspired by my dear husband's love of symmetry.

Do you or your partner ever deliver extra spanks to one side in order to "even up" the spanking? If so, is this a regular practice or an exception. Does the use of "evening up" swats depend upon the position, implement, or purpose? How does the spankee feel about this technique?

If you'd like to join the fun, please enter your response in the form of a comment below. Once everyone has had a turn, I will post an edited summary.

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Jan 22

2012-01-23T18:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic this week was maintenance spankings. Here's what you had to say.

Abby: I get a maintenance spanking once a week. It is a priority. Master sees it as a reminder that I am not in charge and as a deterrent to a punishment spanking. I see it as peace of mind.

Sara: We absolutely do use 'maintenance' or 'resssurance' spankings, generally about twice a week. They have become the cornerstone of our DD marriage!

L.: I think what we do is more of pseudo-maintenance as I ultimately have control over it. Probably most people doing DD would just consider it recreational spanking, but it makes an adjustment in my head anyway so it might as well be maintenance. It works for us!

Poured Out: I think I get spanked often enough (not punishment) that I don't require maintenance spankings.

Hermione: Our spankings are purely recreational, but we do engage in them on a regular basis, and they are very necessary for my well-being. They help me unwind, relax, and reconnect with my husband. They aren't maintenance spankings in the DD sense, but they are very beneficial to our relationship.

Rogue: For the past two months, we've scheduled a maintenance night once a week. Beyond the benefits of simply setting the tone for the week ahead, I've noticed that I no longer have intense headaches. Go figure. :)

Susie: How did you know that this is ALL we've talked about at my house this week? Yes, we do these two times a week and since we started them, punishment spankings are few and far between. I think things would get topsy-turvy if we were to give them up.

Just a lucky guess?

Kitty: Yes, Daddy gives me maintenance spankings, but it usually ends up being a "paintenance" spanking, maintenance + punishment = paintenance... Killing two birds with one stone and all! ;)

Duality: I'll give Grace a maintenance spanking about three to four times per week. They help refocus her and put her in the correct headspace. The biggest benefit, though, is the fact that her anxiety will lessen after one of these spankings. So for us, they are basically therapeutic.

Alex Reynolds: I don't get dedicated maintenance spankings. I get spanked arbitrarily nearly every night, though, and there are times when I use that to focus myself in the way that you've described. I've gotten "reminder" spankings in the past. These spankings were meant to keep my mind focused on accomplishing a particular task or minding a rule which I hadn't been giving enough focus in the past couple of days.

Blondie: How great is your timing with this discussion? We are missing each other and needing to reconnect and he feels a spanking is the answer and I agree. If I haven't been getting into trouble the last few weeks, so spankings have not been necessary. YAY! And our sex spankings haven't been going on much either since we haven't been able to do much of that either. I miss my husband and I miss my spankings and we might just have to do maintenance or something because I don't want to brat to get in trouble.

Spanky: I think our situation is the same as Hermione's. We have regular "fun" spankings five or six days a week, if not every day. This keeps us pretty much on an even keel. I believe they contribute greatly to the increased closeness we've had over the last four years or so.

Lea: J and I have scheduled maintenance spankings once a week. I'm glad we do because I'd hardly ever get spanked otherwise. Why is that? Because I'm so well behaved, duh! LOL The spankings aren't particular hard, but having them does help me to de-stress and feel more centered when it's been a while.

A-Non: We tried maintenance (or "practice," as I liked to call it). We didn't really stick with it. But we've never had a true punishment. We just played around with some minor corrections. Therefore, all of mine have been either practice or purely erotic. Obviously, we are still figuring all of this out.

Having said that, I would like a once-a-week practice to 'reset' our relationship and keep the threat of spanking in my mind.

Kiwi Girlie Girl: Your timing for this week's topic is scary. I had my first proper maintenance last night. It was intense and harsh and he wouldn't stop until he was ready to stop, as opposed to stopping when I ask. It's another step forward for my Sir. The maintenance was just before bed, which followed a punishment earlier in the day. I think it's going to work wonders. I really do. I'm going to post a blog about it later. ;)

Daisy: When we were together, Davey gave me a maintenance spanking every morning to set me up for the day ahead and remind me to behave. Typically, it was not harsh, but just enough for me to not want a harder repeat later!

When I lived alone, he used to make me self spank while on cam with him. I hated that. Fortunately, one of my kids moved back home with me, so that stopped!

A'marie: I've not been in a relationship where this would come in to play, but I find myself intrigued by the notion. I'm perhaps a bit uppity, and it seems that may be an interesting dynamic for reminding me who wields the paddle. ;)

Loki_Darksong: I have considered having maintenance spanking sessions for both my wife and me on several occasions. Of late, we have become two very stressed out individuals. Maintenance spankings may be required to keep us somewhat sane!

I do see the merits of maintenance spankings. I have suggested them for some of our friends as well.

Anon: No maintenance spankings here. All are given under the discipline label and all are painful with considerable soreness afterward. I love it that way. She says it makes me think of her every time I sit down! That's not far from the truth!

Mark: We do not have a label. However, judging by your definition, my wife and I do use maintenance spankings. Sometimes I ask for it, or she does, or either of us decides that it would be good to spank. We just do it, put the clothes back on, and then we go about our things. All is well in the world, and we are at peace again. We have no set time or interval. We're just opportunistic.

Then there is the other kind of spanking, deliberately executed as prelude to other fun. Both hurt all the same though. Spanking is meant to hurt, no? We do not use spanking as discipline.

Bonnie: We don't use the word maintenance, but many of our regular spankings serve the same purpose. Afterward, I feel remarkably calm and focused. We become reconnected and in touch with one another. There can be no doubt about our respective roles. Regular spankings are the key to our peaceful home life.

Thank you all for joining in our brunch conversation!

MBS Spanko Brunch #314

2012-01-21T06:00:00.000-08:00

Hello again, dear friends! We have for your enjoyment a classic brunch question originally posed almost five years ago.

A maintenance spanking is neither disciplinary nor recreational. It is focused instead upon the well-being of the recipient and the relationship. The spanking itself is typically fairly intense and generates considerable residual soreness.

Some couples schedule maintenance spankings at regular intervals. Others employ them as needed. In either situation, the objective is to provide balance, preserve peace of mind, re-establish communication, and reconnect the partners. Our question this week examines whether and how couples utilize maintenance spankings to enhance their relationships.

Do you and your partner employ maintenance spankings? If so, in what circumstances and how effective are they? If not, would you consider this practice? Why or why not?

If you would like to submit a contribution to our brunch discussion, I invite you to leave a comment below. Once everyone has provided their responses, I will publish an edited summary of our discussion.

In with the New: Flurries and Colder Edition

2012-01-18T18:00:00.000-08:00

Don't let the dark and damp of winter get you down. It's time to discover and explore spanking-oriented blogs!

A Girl Surrendered Photoblog

Alta Hensley

An Intimate Relationship with Spanking

Bad Girls Need Good Spankings

Bottoms Up! (F/M)

Domestic But Different

Ebony Discipline and Corporal Punishment

Everyday Spankings

Olivia's Secrets Photoblog

Red Ended Girls

Sex and Spanking

Spanking UK Photoblog

Successful Failures

Thomas Yonge Erotic Stories

Thoughtful Spanker

Tush Spanking Art... and the Giblets

Wife Spanks Me (F/M)

Legend

General Spanking
Photos/Videos
Model/Industry
DD Blogs
Authors/Stories
Ds/BDSM Blogs

To these new members of our community, I bid you welcome. If you would like some blogging tips and suggestions, try these. In any case, we're very glad you're here!

Twelve Million

2012-01-17T18:00:00.001-08:00

A little while ago, MBS registered our twelve millionth page request. That number boggles my mind. I can't visualize twelve million of anything. This modest creation of mine has grown beyond my comprehension.

All I can say is thank you all for six years of steady support. I can't promise another twelve million, but my aim is squarely set on thirteen.

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Jan 15

2012-01-15T18:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic of the week was bottom massaging, before, during, and after a spanking. Here are your thoughts.

morningstar: I have a sneaking suspicion that the bottom massages I receive are not exactly what you are thinking of... But, yes, W does massage my bottom during a spanking session. It's mostly to check the temperature of the skin, to check for any deep tissue bruising, and to have some contact with me.

After a session, yes, W might massage again. But this time, it's mostly to see me jump wince and hear me whine. He is more sadistic than even he likes to admit. :)

Joeyred: During moderate to hard spankings, the top almost always rubs my bottom after it has been spanked. If the session is long and hard, the top may rub the bottom a few times. At spanking parties, sometimes a top will rub my bottom before a spanking if it is already red and sore from previous sessions.

Michael: In most of my spankings of Season, I massage her bottom during and after. We find it sexy and I like to break up the rhythm of the spanks so they don't become predictable. The after massage is also so she feels the "burn" more as I will squeeze a little harder. Also, when massaging I can't help but let my fingers roam to secret areas that lead to a very sexy conclusion to the spanking. We're two very happy and sated people. :-)

Bobbie Jo: My top rubs my bottom before she starts spanking me and sometimes during the spanking. It is a nice touch and helps me relax and feel more at ease.

Simon: My Mistress will sometimes massage my bottom prior to my beating. I find it a delightful moment of gentleness before the serious business of thrashing me begins. The only problem, I find, is that the oils make my bottom very sensitive. As she normally begins with a paddle, I find the initial strokes very painful. It is a very similar sensation to being punished on a wet bottom which, as anyone who has experienced it knows, is considerably more painful than on the dry.

Curtis G: I always massage the bottom during and after a spanking. It makes the spanking more pleasant and with a few special women, more intimate.

Sarah Thorne: Yes, massaging the bottom is part of our spanking. Sometimes it's done just simply because RG likes to touch my butt! :)

During spanking, in between spanks, it's done to help increase tolerance so I can take more for harder and longer. During casual play, I allow it for that reason, but only if it doesn't get too gratuitously touchy! After a spanking, it's to help soothe the pain away!

Daisy: Oh, YES! Before, during, and after, Davey loves the massage a bit more than the spanking, I suspect! He does it before to just appreciate my bottom, during to check how tender I am, and after to rub it in and check for any deep muscle soreness, and to enjoy my discomfort! LOL As has been said, this often leads to more intimate, enjoyable action!

Abby: Unless it is a punishment, he rubs before, during and after. For a punishment spanking, the after is eliminated. He wants me to "wear" it as long as possible. For other spankings, the after leads to wonderful fun!

Six of the Best: I give my loved one a bottom massage before and after a spanking, with some tender bottom smooch kisses as well.

Sublime Wifey: When I see the word "massage," I think of kneading muscles to relax or work out a kink (pardon the pun). In that case, no, my husband does nothing of the sort. He does do some light rubbing before, during, and after to gauge the temperature of the skin and check for welts, but I think it's more to admire his work. Sometimes, there is a sensual quality to it, a clear lead up to something more later. Other times, it really is just his fascination with the quality of his work. Either way, I enjoy it.

Sunny Girl: It's before, during and after for us. He likes my bum and loves to touch in every way. It is a sensual thing for both of us and always leads to other activities.

Hermione: If I ask nicely, I can have a bottom massage with scented lotion afterward.

Country Spanker: Rubbing or massaging is something I do so much that it should probably listed as a hobby. There is rubbing better after a punishment, mainly by me, but sometimes she does it herself.

Sara: Yep, it's before, during, and after as long as it is not a spanking for punishment! Then it's very straight forward and pleasure is not on the menu.

Kitty: Yes, I've had bottom massages for years, long before spankings. It's very erotic, I think.

Anon #1: I have received a "buffing" from time to time. That is a vigorous rubbing with a fairly rough towel. You might be amazed at how uncomfortable a buffing can be and how red you can get in just a couple of minutes. And that's even present the next day.

Meridith: I mostly just like the massage afterward. In between, she pinches, which I love... or hate... depending upon the situation. Massage before makes me antsy. Anticipation isn't my strong suit.

Make Mine Red: Most certainly! We like it before, during and after. It arouses both of us just as much as the spanking does, sometimes more.

Todd and Suzy: For us, most spankings include some massaging of the bottom. It can help with a warm-up for fun and playful spankings. It can be a big part of sensual/erotic spanking. It can serve as a break during harder play, and then it's an important part of aftercare. The exception to this pattern is discipline. There, there's no massage or rubbing until all the spanking is done.

While massage is a regular part of our routine, we have a few friends that aren't interested in any massage. It's either too personal/intimate for the dynamic or it's just not their thing in general. That's totally fine too. Whatever works.

Lea: The original question specifies "massage" which I take to mean more than a little rubbing. When I'm spanked, there is almost always a bit of rubbing. Often before switching implements or to break up a longer more intense spanking. Some tops seem to do it to check that everything is even. As far as a more extensive massage, that's something I'd only have my husband doing and does come up occasionally.

Prefectdt: I regard the spanking itself as a massage. It's a very deep muscle massage admittedly, :) but a massage that is as good for the mind as it is for the body.

Anon #2: My husband just gave me my first spanking. He massaged throughout it and sometimes used it as a change of pace. Although, he definitely rubbed before, during, and after. He said he's hooked and that I'll be expecting more in the future! :)

Ronnie: If it's a punishment, there's no massaging. But for all the others, yes - before, during and after. I particularly like the after massaging.

Dr. Ken: I always rub and knead a spankee's bottom during a spanking - unless, of course, the spankee has told me they don't like it or don't want me to.

It's not just a change of pace, but a change of sensation. And after many spanks that build in intensity, I think the Bottom appreciates the break and the care. It also seems to enable the spankee to recover a bit, and then they can get a longer spanking as a result. And then, of course, it's also done when the spanking is over as part of the aftercare.

To me, it's all part of being a good Top!

S.N.M.: Without exception. Any physical contact between hand and bottom is a good thing, and intermittent rubbing helps the sub last longer.

Disciplined Boyfriend: Isn't spanking just an extreme form of massage and stimulation? We generally leave massages out of spankings since they are usually punishments - a rub here and a touch there is far from massage.

Bonnie: Our answer is an unequivocal yes. Whether before, during, or after a spanking, Randy loves to run his hands over my bottom, hips and thighs. He rubs. He kneads. He pokes, prods, presses, and pats. He likes my curves and shows it through touching. He squeezes to draw out all of the residual ouch as we make love after a spanking. He rubs my bottom even when spanking is not on the agenda. He thinks this drives me wild. He's right.

Thanks, everyone, for joining our brunch conversation!

MBS Spanko Brunch #313

2012-01-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

Hello again, dear friends, and welcome to our weekly brunch. This week's question was submitted by a new friend who wishes to remain anonymous.

Do your spankings ever include a bottom massage before, during, or after? If so, when is it performed and for what purpose? If you employ rubbing and kneading, is it a part of your regular routine or a change of pace?

I invite you to answer our question and join the conversation. Just leave your thoughts in the form of a comment below. At the end of the weekend, I will compile them all in the form of an edited summary.

Word Cloud

2012-01-09T18:00:00.000-08:00

I haven't created a word cloud in a long time. I like this one a lot.

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Jan 8

2012-01-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic of the week was the name used to refer to the person who spanks. I hope everyone enjoyed the dual poll and discussion format. I thought it made for a good change of pace. Here are your thoughts.

Sara: We use "husband" most often and "Head of Household" occasionally when referring to his role in our home. He definitely qualifies as a "spanker" and an occasional "disciplinarian" if need be (I always try to minimize that one). I never use "Sir" and I think Grant qualifies as "Something else!"

Mick: "Sir" didn't work for us. We describe me as being the leader. But I'm not sure I WANT to know what Lynda is calling me in her mind when she's being spanked.

Melly: When referring to his role, it's head of household, but more often than not, he's my husband.

Scunge: I refer to him mostly by his name, but if it is a discipline session, it's Sir. I do refer to him as my husband as well, though we are not married yet. Soon though. :)

Bobbie Jo: I refer to the person who spanks me as my "Top" because I like the term and I also refer to her as my friend, because she is. I think I call her "my friend" more than anything else. I really love her.

MarQe: I generally insist that my spankees call me Sir. It's very English school protocol and is what I grew up with.

Vanille: I call Her "Master" or "Fang." She likes both. In vanilla settings, of course, she's "my girlfriend" or "Fang" since Fang is a pretty darn vanilla-ish nickname so it flies pretty well over 'nilla radars. :)

Spanky: Kallisto doesn't often address me during spanking, but when she does, it's usually "Sir."

Hermione: When writing about him on my blog, I refer to the person who spanks me as my husband. When writing about spanking in general, I usually call the one who does the spanking the spanker. Very occasionally, I will use the word Top.

When we are together, I sometimes call my husband Sir. It happened accidentally once when I wanted to verbalize my feelings of submission, and it worked for both of us. So I say Sir from time to time, when the situation warrants it. We rarely call each other by our real names. With only two of us in the house, it doesn't seem necessary.

I like Sara's observation that calling the one who spanks by his blogging pseudonym qualifies as "Something Else."

Sunny Girl: He's always my husband or Babe or Honey or Sweetie. He's Sir only in jest, as in "Yes sir, right away, sir. No sir, three bags full sir."

Six of the Best: Both spanker and spankee are called by their given name.

Jean Marie: When I'm in mixed company (vanillas and kinksters), I call him my boyfriend, my lover, my man, or by name. When speaking to fellow spankos, I refer to him as my top because I adore being "under" him, literally during sex, and figuratively under his thumb, care, dominance, punishing hand, etc.

I sometimes call my boyfriend "Sir" during a session for fun. I always refer to MarQe that way in my correspondence with him because I sense he likes it, and I want to please him for fear that if we ever do get to play together, he'll whip the stuffing out of me!

Prefectdt: At the time of play, I like to use whatever title the Top feels most comfortable with. In general conversation, I prefer to use the term Top because it covers a whole range of personality types and play styles, without sounding too BDSMy. On the rare occasions when I top I prefer to be called Sir, as I a not a natural switch, but this title helps to get me into a dominant role play mind set.

Disciplined Boyfriend: Usually. it's a very grovelling Yes Dear, though sometimes Miss or Mistress and very occasionally, Lady C.

SublimeWifey: When I refer to him in comments on spanking blogs, I refer to him as my husband. Face to face, I call him by his name. I want to try titles like Sir or Master, at least when we play since that's not the dynamic of our marriage, but he's not a fan. I'll call him Sir to let him know I'm interested in playing, but titles aren't really a part of our playtime either. I'd do it if he wanted it, but it seems that's not the way he sees himself.

Kitty: I used to always call him by his first name, but over time what I call him has evolved to fit different circumstances.

If I'm around peers, I still refer to him by his first name.
If I'm around our children, I call him Daddy.
When we're alone, just the two of us, I call him Master. if I'm feeling especially submissive. But most of the time, I call him Daddy.
If I'm spanked for discipline, I'm required to call him Sir.

Dr. Ken: Mostly, I prefer "Ken". :-)

More often than not, I prefer the term "Spanker." I think that fits me the best. I'll use "Top" as it seems to be in more common usage, but "Spanker" better describes me.

Dee: I don't really use any of these terms. 'Sir' has been used, but neither of us are that comfortable with it (especially me :). However, I am required to say 'yes' instead of a garbled 'uhuh' kinda thing, which is actually rather hard to say strangely enough!

Penelope: My partner and I are avid kinksters, but in a compartmentalised rather than a 24/7 sense. Most often in everyday life we call each other by our pet names (aww), and our real names when with others. When we're playing, the names we use depend on the saucy scenario. For example:

Schoolgirl and teacher: Sir
Maid and master: Sir or Master
Naughty little brat: Daddy

Country Spanker: I'm always Sir when discipline is involved. Otherwise, I get called all manner of things.

Make Mine Red: Since our spankings are strictly fun and part of foreplay, I refer to him as my husband. I loved reading everyone's comments!

Lea: I use the term top. My husband is a top, so I'd call him either/or, but I also play with other people and refer to them as tops. Disciplinarian would be fitting for a few of them, but isn't a term I generally use.

Bonnie: My husband qualifies as a top and a spanker, but mostly I call him by his name. He may extract a Sir from me under certain circumstances, but that's a part of getting me into the desired headspace.

My favorite brunches are often those where we attract a wide variety of viewpoints. This week was certainly such an occasion. Each of the ten names I listed in the poll received votes. The discussion was even more interesting. What I take away from our conversation is that there are almost as many names as there are lifestyle variations, and that's a fine arrangement.

MBS Spanko Brunch #312

2012-01-07T06:00:00.000-08:00

What name or title do you most frequently use to refer to the person who spanks?

How has this name and role evolved over time?

This week, I invite you to both cast a vote and tell your story in the form of a comment. Once everyone has had a chance to respond, I will post an edited summary.

In with the New: Resolutions Edition

2012-01-02T18:00:00.000-08:00

A new year brings a new collection of spanking blogs to explore and enjoy!

A Bottom is a Terrible Thing to Waste (F/M)

Abel's Spanking Stories

Christian Domestic Discipline

EmpowerSpank

Insatiabear

Miss Laia's Guide to Disciplinary Self Spanking

My Change by Discipline

Naughty Little Writer

Our Journey with Taken in Hand

Please Spank My Perfect Bottom, Sir

Spanking & Submission

Spankology

Strictly Spanking Photoblog

Tawse Hall

The Paddled Bottom

Tuning In

Legend

General Spanking
Photos/Videos
Model/Industry
DD Blogs
Authors/Stories
Ds/BDSM Blogs

To these new members of our community, I bid you welcome. If you would like some blogging tips and suggestions, try these. In any case, we're very glad you're here!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Jan 1

2012-01-02T06:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic for the new year was the future of spanko blogging. Here are your thoughts.

Six of the Best: I have always loved spanking blogs that combine pictures with words, words with pictures, or a happy medium of both. As for censorship, this threat is always on the horizon from government or corporations. We spanking enthusiasts must band together to fight for this constitutional right.

Hermione: One of the big changes I foresee is a movement away from written blogs and towards pictorial ones. Tumblr will become more popular and more common, and fewer bloggers will choose the word-based style.

From a technical point of view, Blogger is digging itself a bigger and bigger hole by trying - and failing miserably - to integrate with Facebook, Google+, Picasa and numerous other online giants. That, along with its nasty tendency to smite blogs without warning, will lead to a general movement away from Blogger to more user-friendly and broad-minded platforms like Wordpress.

Alice: I'm not sure I agree that the written word is on the way out and that pictures will predominate. For many of us, our blog is our diary - though why we choose to make it public is a tricky question and one which I often ask myself.

What will keep blogging alive and vibrant? It is the community it encourages, including commentators, followers and lurkers. Anything that encourages active participation and makes our blogs more visible helps. Many Thanks to Bonnie for her part in pulling all this together.

You're welcome, Alice. Think we each have a role to play in keeping this community strong. Time and energy prevent me from visiting every blog and reading every post. But all of us together can encourage our colleagues and ensure they never feel alone.

Lea: Hermione mentions something that worries me all the time. Blogger could possibly pull the plug on many of us. I sure hope that's not the case and that we all go on peacefully within our little corner of the blogosphere with even more great new blogs starting up and joining us.

We spankos have been thrown out of more places than a sailor on shore leave. Does anyone remember MSN forums, Delphi, FortuneCity, or MySpace? Until our kink is accepted within society, wrongheaded self-appointed enforcers of morals will continue to cause trouble. The good news is that we always reconvene somewhere else. The bad news is that we lose friends along the way. Please, everyone, back up your precious content so it can live again.

Mija: I can't speak for blogs in general, though I do think Twitter is thriving as a friendly spank-fetish place.

On my own blogs, el tercer ojo and The Punishment Book, both largely text-based, will be moving from TypePad hosting onto WordPress sites, hosted by Laughing Squid, the same provider we've used to host The Treehouse for years.

As to the issue of Blogger (and even spaces like wordpress.com), everyone chooses what works for them, but personally I always worry when my work, especially my spanking writing, is somewhere I'm not paying for. I saw too many wonderful sites and spaces yanked at the whims of different free providers over the years, in the process causing, at best, a huge amount of frustration and at worst, a terrible loss of writing, work and communities.

That said, I'm fortunate to have been able to afford my TypePad and Laughing Squid accounts over the years. I know that not everyone has the option of paying for their spanking interest / hobby.

David: happy new year bonnie from all of us that love you and yours and them that loves them,thanks again what a joy you are regards.

Spanky: I also worry about using Blogger. Every time I start using it again, I begin to worry that I'll find one day that my blog was eaten. Though there seems to be an explosion of Tumblr photo blogs, I can't see the popularity of the text blog decreasing any time soon.

To keep the community strong, I think we need to follow Bonnie's lead and continue to lend each other our support wherever possible.

Ronnie: I too worry that Blogger will pull the plug on some of us.

Spanky is right. We all need to lend a helping hand and support each other.

Spank-A-Lot: I am sure that numerous changes lie ahead for the blogosphere, and not just for the spanking community. Although it is not as prevalent in the spanking community, the matter of originality will probably be challenged in the years ahead. As others mentioned, sites like Tumblr effectively allow cross-platform sharing and have increased in popularity. Thus there should be a decline in text-based content from many bloggers.

As long as those who believe in the spanking blogger community remain strong, we will prevail. However, Blogger may just have the last laugh. If it keeps on stamping out adult-related blogs, I guess the time will come to look for an adult-friendly blogging platform. I kind of thought there used to be one in, erm, Thumbblogger?

Tenth Muse Top: I think the challenges that face our community - and the solutions to them - are part of the global picture of unrest, economic downturn and attempts, from all sides, to 'save' our ‘way of life’ (Which is tricky as everyone has a different notion of what that is or should be!). Last year was shocking in how change was borderless and swept across the world. I’m sure it hasn’t ended yet.

Governments, threatened by Wikileaks and (in the UK) tabloid trespassing through phone hacking, want more censorship and are talking about criminalising the free distribution of ‘sensitive’ data. The trouble is, they can’t figure out how to do it yet as the platforms are being created faster than regulations can be drawn up to police them – and the danger of being the first to introduce Chinese-style internet controls makes even the most hawkish advocates pause.

Alongside that, the philosophical challenges of the Occupy Movement to the economic system, of climate change groups to energy suppliers and of holistic health practitioners to pharmaceutical companies (a European battle) make finding ways to stifle debate through censorship very attractive to failing governments and any alternative lifestyle group could be caught in the crossfire of loose legislation, which was designed to be able to muffle future undefined protests.

So… the solution has to be as many have said here, to support each other and also to embrace the fearless and creative trailblazing ways of those who would like to change our society for the people… Now more than ever is a year to join the debate and let our voices be heard. How do we want to remodel the world?

With respect and inclusivity for all of course!

Great response, TMT! You really place our struggle into the larger world context. We do indeed all have a role to play. I worry when I read that even a progressive country like Denmark has implemented internet censorship. We must never believe that it can't happen here.

Bonnie: A community is far more than the technology that links us. We rely upon the internet to communicate, but the essence of any community is its people. I believe if we are strong and dedicated to our purpose, we can survive and grow. Our efforts to build community today will serve us well should we encounter difficult times later.

I suspect Tumblr is at or nearing its pinnacle. Too much of the content seems to be the same promotional photos being reblogged over and over. As my husband says, the signal-to-noise ratio is very low. Only perhaps one in ten spanking photoblogs has any original content at all. That model is probably not sustainable.

Twitter is a different story. It may yet prove to be a fad, but I don't think so. It isn't a direct competitor to blogs, except that it consumes the time of content creators who might otherwise be blogging. Twitter is something unique that probably finds a place as blogging's real time cousin.

While Twitter cannot replace blogs, its influence may change them. Perhaps posts get shorter and more frequent. Comments may be elevated to posts in their own right. Finally, blogs could evolve into less a personal space with invited visitors and more a communal space run by participating peers. At this point, the distinction between blog and forum begins to blur. And that might be a positive development.

I am an optimist most of the time and I take this perspective as I look toward our future. There are undoubtedly threats on the horizon, and they are real, but they are the same ones we've worried about for years. On the positive side, the vanilla community and the media seem to more frequently mention spanking (with sex) in a favorable context. To the extent that our lifestyle can gain tolerance and acceptance, we can make our case in the court of public opinion. We can thank the GLBT community for illuminating this path.

My hope is that emerging tools will provide new opportunities to connect with like-minded friends. I look forward to carrying our message that consensual adult spanking is acceptable, safe, popular, and fulfilling to those who still hide this part of themselves. They need never feel alone again. We have a wonderful community to support them and celebrate their successes along the journey.

As we begin 2012, there are thousands of men and women who have long wished they could experience giving or receiving a good spanking. My dream is that by year's end, many of them will know exactly how it feels.

Thank you all for starting our year with an excellent discussion!

MBS Spanko Brunch #311

2011-12-31T06:00:00.003-08:00

Welcome to the last brunch of 2011 or the first brunch of 2012, depending upon where you live and when you arrive. In either case, the changing of the year seems like an ideal time to think about what lies ahead.

We've witnessed many changes in our community and the process never stops. Hundreds of spanking blogs come and go each year. What we thought might be huge shifts turned out to be mere fads (MySpace, podcasting). It's difficult to predict whether Twitter and VLogs will ultimately meet the same fate. Facebook is huge, but not for spankos. Some observers have even predicted the death of blogs. Will the threat of government or corporate censorship silence our leading voices or drive them underground? Or might the mass consciousness evolve toward acceptance of our kink and the people who practice it?

It's impossible to know, but fun to speculate. That is our challenge this weekend.

What changes do you foresee for our community of spanking bloggers in 2012 and beyond? What obstacles do we face? What can we do to make the most of our opportunities and ensure that our community remains strong and relevant?

To join our conversion, please enter your thoughts in the form of a comment below. Once everyone has registered their responses, I will post an edited summary.

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Dec 25

2011-12-26T06:00:00.000-08:00

I hope everyone is enjoying a splendid holiday weekend. Our question dealt with our 2012 plans to make our lifestyle more fulfilling, more enjoyable, or more a part of our daily life.

Dragon's Rose: More spankings!

Otto: Merry Christmas, Bonnie. And a happy New Year. Keep on blogging!

Thank you, Otto!

Spanky: I'd like to continue blogging and share our happiness with others. Merry Christmas Bonnie! You're a real inspiration.

Welcome back, Spanky! It's great to have you home for the holidays.

Sunny Girl: I look forward to more spankings, more blogging, less stress and more relaxation time.

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Thank you, dear SG.

Country Spanker: I aim to get my head to the right place and keep it there. I want to do more blogging with more pics. Thanks Bonnie, for another great year of your blog, and Merry Christmas.

Thanks, CS. Having you join our community was a highlight of 2011!

Hermione: Daily blogging, frequent playful exchanges with my husband, and regular spankings all make TTWD a regular part of my life. I'd like to experiment with some new ideas to keep our interactions fresh and exciting and maintain our enthusiasm.

Thank you, Hermione, for your incredible daily posts and everything else you do to promote our community and keep it vibrant.

Six of the Best: Seasons Greetings Bonnie, to you and your hubby. Since I am as nutty as the delicious fruit cake you show, I would love to continue spanking the bare bottoms of naughty ladies, plus communicating with as many spanking bloggers as there are in this whole wild world.

Thank you, Six!

MarQe: I'd like to see a bit more of my own little country, go to see lots of great live music, and keep my spankees in line. I would also wish to meet a few new ladies who need my firm hand applied in the traditional manner!

Happy Christmas xxx

Thank you, MarQe. I hope 2012 brings you good fortune, good health, and enthusiastic spankees.

S.N.M.: Is that a rectangular prism made of pizza? My world has been changed.

I'd like to actually live out some of my fantasies in the coming year. I'm much more confident with women than I've ever been before, and I'm going to start out the year with three months in the Carribean, which is home to some of the most calyphigian cabooses on the planet. Wish me luck.

OK, that's funny! You made me call Randy to the computer. I do wish you luck with your next adventure. Please come back and tell us about your rosy successes.

Kitty: I'd love to learn more about the joys of spanking. May 2012 be even better in that regard.

Michael M: Hi and Merry Christmas. My wish list would be:

Success at work
Keeping my wife happy and content
An outdoor spanking in the woods

Thank you, Michael. That seems like a very reasonable list. Here's hoping it all comes true.

Lea: More spankings would be nice. Nothing else is coming to mind at the moment. I hope you and Randy have a great Christmas!

Thanks, Lea! I wish you an amazing 2012.

Bree: It would make it so much better if I could just find an unattached long term partner who fits my needs and lives near me. I think that is asking too much, though.

Merry Christmas to you and yours, Bonnie!

Same to you, Bree. Thanks! As long as you don't live alone on a desert island, I have to think your future partner must be around somewhere. Best wishes in finding them.

Melly: Happy Holidays to you and yours!

For me, it would have to be to continue blogging because I have enjoyed it thus far.
To meet a DD couple in real life.
Also, more sexy spankings and fewer less punishment spankings

Thank you, Melly!

Curtis G: First, thank you for your blog and hope you have a wonderful holiday season and new year. If I had my biggest wish, it would be to have a special and continuing partner who was, like me, a switch and who was into fun and erotic spanking (one who was also compatible intellectually and emotionally). In the absence of that special person and because my life track is comparatively short, I'd like to have many friends and playmates in this community.

You're very welcome, Curtis, and thanks. May your hunt for a partner be successful.

Poppy: Well, 2012 will be all about integrating my spanking life with the rest of my life (not my working life!) and I will keep people posted via my blog. I do not want to curse myself with prophesy so I will say no more.

May I wish you and yours a very happy Christmas?

Yes, you may, and thank you! Here's to an integrated spanking life.

Rod: Happy holidays, Bonnie. I have found blogging about our interest to be very fulfilling, so I hope to continue in 2012. I'd like to meet a few more of my readers and contributors to share some quality time with them.

P.S. Thanks for your support of The Canery and all the new blogs. It's a great help.

It's a genuine pleasure to introduce new blogs to the community and help them get started. Thank you for those lovely holiday wishes.

Blondie: I would like to continue with DD or and our fun spanking too. I would like to lose weight as soon as possible. I would like to meet some of my new blog friends. And I hope to get my oldest son off to college!

Merry Christmas Bonnie and Thanks for a great blog

You're quite welcome, Blondie. I hope all of your aspirations are realized.

Cutiebootie: Merry Christmas, Bonnie! I hope that you and your family are having a wonderful holiday season so far. I'd like to thank you for supporting my blog over the years and for sharing your blog with us.

Next year, I would like to act out more fantasies that my guy and I have. We have started to, as we continue to get to know each other and share our fantasies. He never spanked anyone until he met me. He loves spanking me now and a number of our interests have been carried out. So, I'm sure that this trend will continue into the new year. =)

Thank you, CB! That's a wonderfully fun New Year's wish. Enjoy!

The VBB: Thanks for your great blog I look forward to working through your spanking blogs links next year and to show my appreciation for the great blogs by posting more comments. If all goes as planned, I hope to make a trip to Spanking Court in 2012!

Thank you, VBB, and best of luck at Spanking Court. :D

Bonnie: 2011 has been a remarkable year in many ways. I can barely wish for more next year, unless it's more of the same. I hope to get to better know my blogging friends and meet a bunch of enthusiastic new bloggers. Oh, yes, and a vigorous spanking every Friday evening would be lovely as well.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Peaceful Solstice, and Delightful Non-Holiday to all as applicable. As we close the year, I look forward to a terrific 2012 for our spanking community. Thank YOU for making it great!

MBS Spanko Brunch #310

2011-12-24T06:00:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays, my dear friends! I hope the season brings you cheer and contentment.

I puzzled over what we should discuss this weekend. With the holiday and everyone being busy, it didn't seem like the right time for deep philosophical pondering. And yet, I think we've covered every possible holiday question several times. I decided instead that the end of the year is an ideal time to look forward (not an easy feat for those like me who woke up with a throbbing distraction in back).

What would you like to do in 2012 to make your lifestyle more fulfilling, more enjoyable, or more a part of your daily life?

If you'd like to take a break from cookie baking, present wrapping, or tree decorating, please enter your response in the form of a comment. At the end of the weekend, I will post an edited summary.

In with the New: Mistletoe Edition

2011-12-22T18:00:00.000-08:00

In the spirit of the season, I invite you to visit, greet, and welcome these new friends!

Disciplined Boyfriend

Joan Defers Photoblog

Love and Other Mysteries

Legend

General Spanking
Photos/Videos
Model/Industry
DD Blogs
Authors/Stories
Ds/BDSM Blogs

To these new members of our community, I bid you welcome. If you would like some blogging tips and suggestions, try these. In any case, we're very glad you're here!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Dec 18

2011-12-18T18:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic this week was photoblogs. Here's what you think.

Pink: Having a photoblog, I'm a little bit biased. I prefer those that contain minimal text (perhaps just sourcing) so that I can let my mind wander instead of being limited to someone else's take on the picture.

In contrast, I prefer more specific descriptions when visiting text-oriented blogs. I want the writer to take me somewhere.

Blondie: I love them all! And I am glad that your MBS blog has links to them all.

Sara: Personally, I have little interest in photoblogs.

Sublime Wifey: I enjoy the photoblogs. Sometimes, I must admit that I find the professional photos, while beautifully done, a bit intimidating. Just like any photo with gorgeous models who have have perfect hair, make-up, and bottoms, I feel inadequate. The ones with photos of real people might not look as striking (haha - I think I'm punny), but I don't feel so out of place in the spanko world when I see them.

Hermione: I've always said there are two types of people in the world: those who enjoy words and those who prefer pictures. I am one of the former, and rarely enjoy my visits to photoblogs. Some spanking pictures are clever, funny, and even arousing, but when I see total nudity, exposed genitalia, sexual acts, or extreme marking, I'm outta there!

Thanks to the colour-coding in your Kindred Spirits blogroll, readers know the type of blog they are visiting before they click, so photoblogs can easily be avoided or specifically chosen, depending on personal preference.

Dr. Ken: I do enjoy the photoblogs as long as they stick to the subject of spanking and have fairly original content. I agree with Hermione when it comes to photos or drawings that are more pornographic in nature. If there is exposed genitalia, sex acts, or heavy marking, I don't go back!

The photoblogs I DON'T like are those that just raid Tumblr, Photobucket, etc. every day and re-post pictures other people just put up. That's not a blog – it's a Xerox machine!

MarQe: Surprise I like photoblogs! I have a Tumblr that is a spanking blog, but also contains some sexual content and stuff I happen to like.

I do not like images that are too severe or overtly crude in nature.

Jean Marie: My lover and I both enjoy photoblogs if they are "sexy." I realize that is subjective. We don't like ones that show heavy punishment, dreadful bruising or bloody marks. Lupus comes to mind as one of this type that we avoid. We're turned-on by blogs that seem to admire the beauty of the female derriere or show the drama of the power-play between the top and bottom. I often become very aroused looking at sites like MarQe's Study, and will either summon Keiter to the monitor to have a look for himself, or just go seduce him. Some pictures are so evocative, I have to write a short story about it, which turns me on even more...

Sunny Girl: I'm with Hermione. I'm more excited by words. I don't mind seeing a spanked bottom, but I don't like extreme marking, exposed genitalia, or explicit sex.

Daisy: I have, on occasion, visited a photoblog, some accidentally and some deliberately, and have never really enjoyed much of what I saw. I guess I am more of a words person! I agree with Hermione and others who have already posted.

Seeing naked people, or vicious looking marks, and especially exposed genitalia, actually makes me feel quite uncomfortable. And I don't like stumbling across pictures of people having sex either.
I prefer to read, and from the details given, build up my own little picture in my head!

That said, I think it is great that you include them in your blogroll. Everyone is different, and we can choose which we wish to investigate. I actually find it helpful. Each of us can more easily avoid the type of blogs we are not so interested in, and head for those we DO want to see!

TheVBB: I enjoy a good spanking photoblog as long as they stay on subject. I don't like it when I am looking through spanking pictures and all of a sudden I run across a group of explicit sexual pictures. That is not why I look at spanking photoblogs. I also do not like hard core spanking pictures such as those from Russia or Eastern Europe that are very graphic and abusive.

Mikki: I agree, word for word, with Hermione. I couldn't have said it better!

Fizzy: I think my problem with some photoblogs is that if there's something you don't want to see, it's too late. By the time you look away that image has already been seared into your brain. With text you have a bit of warning. I like to see well-chosen photos within text blogs, but my favorites have few or no photos at all.

Lea: I do like some photoblogs. I like the written word best and tend frequent those types of blogs, but photoblogs have their place.

David: I think it's all been said. I like a nice pink bottom, but those Eastern European photos are gross. As I say to mine, my safeword is for spanking my bottom, not burying a 6-inch nail!

Six of the Best: It is said that 'a picture is worth a thousand words,' and yet, I agree that the words in spanking blogs play a very important part in our spanking community. I thoroughly enjoy my communications with you and other spanking enthusiasts. As to a solution to this problem, only time will tell. Besides, I have never believed in censorship, and you probably likewise.

That's right. I believe people are smart enough to know what is appropriate for them.

Keiter: Imagine my surprise in seeing that my girlfriend had posted my point of view yesterday without checking in with me. Jeanie is currently not sitting on her adorable bottom.

To add MY perspective, I think I enjoy photoblogs more than my girlfriend (who is more visual than most women, from my experience). Women are more cerebral and men more graphic in general. I can speak for both of us to say that we like your extensive blog roll and its color coded clarity.

Our Bottoms Burn: What Hermoine said seems to be a common view and one we share "when I see total nudity, exposed genitalia, sexual acts, or extreme marking, I'm outta there!"

If it's only pictures, it had better be outstanding photography that we have never seen before. We are not good with words in our blog, so we often use pictures to express what we fail to do in words. Sometimes, I will just post a few pictures which I call a phone-in no effort post.

Bonnie: I find it difficult to paint all photoblogs with a broad brush. To be sure, there are some I find relentlessly offensive, for all of the reasons noted above. However, there are other photobloggers who seek to intrigue more than shock. Even a dedicated word nerd like me can appreciate a thoughtful and artistic presentation of spanking and romantic subjects.

For an example, I encountered a photograph a while back that showed just enough to rev my motor. In the foreground was a woman's face. Her expression was one of pure bliss. Over her shoulder, her smooth back and hips were visible. Behind her, but appearing slightly out of focus, was her lover with his strong hands gripping her hips. This photo captured the essence of lovemaking without sliding into porn. It was sex-positive and female friendly. I can tell this story with words, but it would be difficult to capture the emotion in her eyes.

Likewise, in spanking photographs, less is often more. I really want to see people's faces. I want to know about the feelings behind the action. Only then can my own imagination take over.

Understanding the diversity of tastes of MBS readers, I seek to link blogs that appeal to their interests. I include many spanking photoblogs in the mix because I think they express a perspective that is unique and, at least to some readers, valuable. There are spanking oriented photoblogs that I choose not to link for various reasons. But in general, if it relates to consensual adult spanking, you can get there from here.

Emily Winters: I prefer blogs that illustrate text with photos. It's what I do. I have a great deal of fun seeking out those copyright-free images that best present what I say in my text. I do visit both types of blogs and enjoy them all. What's not to love when a good spank is in order?

Joeyred51: I agree with Hermione and Lea. I prefer text more than just pictures. But beautiful pictures plus well written prose, such as found in Emily's blog, is the best of both worlds.

Thanks, everyone, for sharing your insights!

MBS Spanko Brunch #309

2011-12-17T06:00:00.000-08:00

Hello, again, dear friends, and welcome! Our MBS blogroll contains 476 links at this moment. 71 (or 15%) of those links lead to photoblogs. Over the past year, this number has more than doubled. Photoblogs, and Tumblr in particular, have become tremendously popular in our community and beyond.

And yet, I have readers who question the need for MBS to link these blogs. They dislike the format, the graphic nature of some content, or the repetition that arises from reposting. I am curious to know what you think.

Do you visit spanking-oriented photoblogs? Do you enjoy the primarily pictorial content? If so, what sort of content do you find most appealing? If you don't like some photoblogs, why not? What lessons, if any, might text-oriented bloggers learn from the explosive success of photoblogs?

I hope you will take a few minutes and join our conversation. For first timers, all you need to do is enter your thoughts in the form of a comment. Once everyone has weighed in, I will post an edited summary.

Bonnie's Mailbag

2011-12-13T18:00:00.000-08:00

Wow, this thing is heavy. Let's look inside...

Question: I am Mr.William and would like to order (Burl Round Table)and what would be the price for each unit so that i can Quote you with the quantity i want to order..

Response: Mr.William, I think you have the wrong number.

Question: Are there any reliable statistics on how many spanking enthusiasts there are - in the USA and in the UK?

Response: In researching your question, I entered into Google the following query: How popular is adult spanking?

The number one link was my blog! If I knew the answer, I wouldn't be using Google! :)

It's a great question that deserves a great response. So I dug a bit further and found this article. It says:

18 percent of men and 7 percent of women fantasize about spanking someone.

11 percent of men and 13 percent of women fantasize about being spanked.

I have no idea how accurate or authoritative this data is, but it seems plausible.

Comment: On "Covert Affairs" (Tuesday at 10PM on USA) there are two lead females who work in the CIA. Joan Campbell, is an "older" looking woman who looks as I envision you. The actress is Kari Matchett, and if/when the "Bottom Smarts" film is done, she would be excellent for the starring role as Bonnie. She is an attractive blonde whose ample derriere would be perfect for OTK, paddle, hairbrush and other forms of spanking.

Response: Thank you for your suggestion. If they make MBS the Movie, I'm hoping for JLo!

Question: Would it be possible to place the legend with the links in "In with the New" posts?

Response: Not only is it possible, it's a great idea. Done.

Question: Does alcohol heighten the pain tolerance? does it improve the overall spanking experience?

Response: I recommend against spanking when either party is intoxicated. I would compare it to driving a car without brakes. It's a dangerous scenario. Please save it for another day.

Comment: Just found your blog and I wanted to say how fun it is.

Response: Thank you!

Question: Do you wear an underwire bra?

Response: Yes, most of the time.

Question: Are you offended by F/F spanking stories?

Response: Not at all.

Question: Can I make money with blogs?

Response: Yes, it's possible to make money through blogging. I choose not to allow advertising on my blog because I want full control over what MBS readers see. I also think a lot of ads look tacky. Many feature explicit photos I would never post.

The biggest issue for me is that I don't want readers to think my opinions or my endorsement can be bought. As a trained journalist, I feel the need to be (and perceived as being) independent and credible. I work all week for my employer to make a living. I write what they want. In contrast, my blog is a labor of love. It cannot be about money.

I wouldn't criticize a blogger for a few (comparatively) tasteful ads, but I avoid any blog that is merely a digital billboard.

I honestly don't know how much money can be made. I've heard spanko bloggers claim they made $100/month, which isn't trivial, but I doubt anyone is going to retire in luxury.

Question: Do most female spankees prefer rear entry sex?

Response: I can't speak for most female spankees, but my answer is yes.

Question: Can I ask how you and your hubby got into spanking? Did it start while you were dating? Did you bring it up? Did he? Have you always enjoyed being spanked?

Response: I've been interested in spanking for as long as I can remember. I was one of those kids who looked up spanking words in the dictionary and thought up spanking scenarios for my dolls. As I grew older, spanking became a core part of my sexuality. I experimented with early boyfriends (always at my suggestion), but found little satisfaction until I met Randy in college.

You can read about that discovery here.

Question: So spanking for you is foreplay? How often are you spanked? Have you ever given him a taste of the brush?

Response: Yes, spanking is foreplay, but it's a lot more than that. It fixes my head on several different levels. I've written a lot about this on the blog. There is no better stress relief.

The frequency of spankings at our house varies depending upon what else is happening in our lives. It's once a week for sure, twice a week on average, three or four times in a week if I'm fortunate.

As for the brush, I know it very, very well. My husband's favorite implement is a curved handled body brush. But he does all of the spanking. Neither of us have any interest in switching.

Question: Three or four times a week? Wow, is your bottom ever not sore or red? I'm guessing some of the spankings are playful and short?

Response: Even if I get spanked four times a week, there is usually plenty of time when my bottom is not red and sore. As one is spanked more frequently, his or her bottom tends to become tougher and more resistant to damage. As a result, there are times when even a half hour later, there is no evidence a spanking happened. This depends a lot upon the implements used, severity, and the state of my body.

Some spankings are short and playful, it's true. Others are more serious. It depends upon why we are spanking and what we hope to achieve.

Question: Hope you dont mind me asking?? Do you get spanked always for fun/sex play etc or is it a lifestyle choise like CDD LDD is your husband your H O H ?

Response: I don't mind your question at all. I created a blog so I could exchange thoughts with friends new and old.

It's difficult to summarize the lifestyle that my husband Randy and I share in a single label. I wouldn't characterize us as a DD (or CDD or LDD) couple. I am submissive and he has my consent to spank whenever he believes it is necessary or beneficial. But he doesn't punish based upon my behavior (or lack thereof). If he chose to do so, I would accept it. But that's not our dynamic.

We do enjoy a lot of playful/sexy spankings. These enrich our relationship and strengthen the bond between us. They hurt, of course, but not excessively so.

Comment: I just wanted to let you know that you've helped me accept what has been rolling around in my head and heart for a very long time. I'm still working up the courage to bring it up with my wife of 20 years, but I think I get a little closer to that everyday. Hopefully I'll get there before we're too old to do anything about it.

Response: Best wishes with your quest to release your inner self! May you both find great joy.

Question: Hi just somehow found your bottom on my phone pc, I would love to be able to put my palm on your bum xx. Do you have more photos, thanks xx.

Response: You found my bottom on your phone? Next time, I'll be more careful where I sit.

Question: Where do you purchase those cute little panties you wear?

Response: Actually, Randy buys a lot of them for me. He likes to dress me in lingerie and have me model it for his pleasure. Many of my underthings come from Nordstrom or Macy's.

Question: can i touch u?

Response: Not even if you learn to spell.

That's about it until next time!

In with the New: Holiday Edition

2011-12-12T06:00:00.000-08:00

For anyone who would like an early gift or another reason to celebrate, look who joined our community!

Adventures of Sarah

Another Country

Daddy Spanks Hard

Hardhand's World of Spanking

I Spank My Wife

My Loving Adventures with DD

Padme Amidala's Journey to the Darkside

Peach's Corner (F/F)

Raine's Musings (F/F)

Sambuca's Naughty Log

Shrinking Expectations

Legend

General Spanking
Photos/Videos
Model/Industry
DD Blogs
Authors/Stories
Ds/BDSM Blogs

To these new members of our community, I bid you welcome. If you would like some blogging tips and suggestions, try these. In any case, we're very glad you're here!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Dec 11

2011-12-11T18:00:00.000-08:00

Our topic this week was kinky holiday gifts. Here are your thoughts.

babygirlsneedlove2: I love to give Daddy silly little gifts. Over the years he has gotten a few that made his eyebrows go up. LOL

Voodoo Doll with pins and instruction book (having his ex in mind)
Book on how to tie knots
Twister board (because I tell him that naked twister is a hard limit) – It's still unopened. LOL

I'm not sure what to get him this year, but you have me thinking now. Maybe a new belt? Oh, maybe that's more for me than for him.

Susie: My husband has been looking at an i-paddle website. I'm not sure which one it is, but perhaps I should be a little nervous about what may show up under the Christmas tree. Sigh!

Six of the Best: On the economic side, if all the countries in the world would participate in spending this holiday season, be it for Christmas or Chanukah, it would certainly help this globe.

As for spanking implements, I have purchased a brand new pliable cane, to be tested on one of my favorite lady's voluptuous bare bottom.

joeyred51: I am attending the Delco holiday spanking party next week and I hope to buy a leather strap from my favorite vendor.

Hermione: I have purchased a couple of gifts that keep on giving. One is a lovely leather belt for Ron. He said he needed a new one, and I assume he intends to wear it, but he might decide to put it to another use.

I've also taken the plunge and bought a cane. I have to figure out how to wrap it so Ron won't guess what's in the package.

Sublime Wifey: I like our homemade spanking implements, but I wouldn't mind something "official" and preferably leather. Or perhaps a set of restraints, such as cuffs or tie downs, to keep me from squirming about too much during our next rigorous spanking adventure.

Daisy: Nope. Nothing. I wouldn't buy a hairbrush or spoon because I don't like the feel of wood. What I would like is a leather paddle. But I am too chicken to travel through customs with anything remotely spanky. I would just die if they searched my case. As a result, I have bought nothing!

Lea: Is there anything I NEED? Nah. Is there anything I WANT? Well, of course! I was actually browsing Cane-iac a few hours ago to see whether anything struck my fancy. I'm undecided, but I will probably return. I hate wood. Maybe something leather...

Sara: I don't know. Maybe my spanko mojo is waning? I don't think we need ONE new implement! I have been disappointed with the last few purchases I made. They were way more intense than I had expected. Sadly, Grant loves them. I'm sticking with books and sweaters, or maybe some nice massage oil?

Kitty: I'm thinking of giving Daddy some rope. ;)

Ronnie: I always buy a few silly gift that I give to P before Christmas – the type for our eyes only.

This year I've bought a carpet beater for him. Well, it's for me really and it's not for hanging on the wall.

Prefectdt: I just put together a scheduled post for tomorrow that features unusual gift ideas. I know there won't be anything kinky from Santa for me, but I am hoping to find a pervertable in the post Xmas sales. ;)

Bonnie: I know I asked the question, but I honestly don't know yet what I'm going to buy for Randy. I have some ideas, but he hasn't indicated what he prefers.

However, I can tell you what I want. My poor old cuffs have seen better days. They're not exactly worn out and they still work, but the outside is covered with remnants of adhesive gunk that won't come off. Randy got carried away with tape one time and the scene was hot, but it ruined my cuffs. All I want is a new set.

Thank you all for participating in our brunch conversation. I hope you'll join us again next weekend.

MBS Spanko Brunch #308

2011-12-10T06:00:00.000-08:00

'Tis the season to be shopping, or so the media would have us believe. I am weary of the relentless spend-spend-spend drumbeat, but there is one section of my gift list for which I still have enthusiasm.

Have you any spanko surprises on your gift list this year? If so, please tell us about the kinky toys and accessories you've discovered.

I encourage you to join our conversation by adding a comment below. Once everyone has had their turn, I will post an edited summary.

Versatile Blogger Award

2011-12-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

Several friends nominated me as a versatile blogger. I am grateful for their recognition and will do all I can to live up to this honor.

Versatile... Versatile... Let's see. I can write dopey holiday song parodies! That's kind of versatile. Right? I can find a way to work spanking into almost any discussion. Yes, that's it. I am versatile after all. Or maybe obsessed.

Anyhow, I'm supposed to tell you seven things you about me that you don't already know. As Erica said, I think I've already revealed all of my secrets. I'm therefore left with trivia.

I like a lot of pillows in the bed. Randy does not.

I enjoy watching the gorillas at the zoo. They sometimes appear deep in thought.

I hung out with the nerds in high school.

My favorite snack on a car trip is Rice Krispie Treats.

I think in a previous life I must have worked in theater.

I refuse to talk on the phone while driving.

Every so often, I absolutely crave sushi.

So there you have it. I'm next supposed to nominate fifteen more bloggers, but I would prefer to direct you over to my blogroll. Please explore a blog you don't know and be sure to tell them Bonnie said "hello." :)

Remembering the Disappeared

2011-12-06T18:00:00.000-08:00

We regularly celebrate the arrival of new blogs to our community. It's a fine day when a blogger hangs out their digital banner and begins to inform, entertain, enlighten, and befriend. I lead the way in greeting them as often as I can because these are our people and we want them to feel at home. I smile as I add each new blog to my blogrolls.

But there's another side. In the past six years, I've watched a thousand spanking-oriented blogs come and go. It pains me to remove old friends from my blogrolls because they don't post any more. I'm sure their reasons are plentiful and valid, but still I wonder.

Some blogs offer a detailed explanation – The story arc has run its course, it's just not fulfilling any more, my relationship is over, I have a new partner, I've lost my kink, I was outed, I'm sick, my days are too full, or I don't want our lives to be so public. The blogger may leave the farewell message up for days or weeks before dispatching the blog. Or it may stand forever as a memorial to the vibrant meeting place the blog once was.

Those words help readers to understand the blogger's mindset, but they're seldom satisfying. Far worse are the blogs that simply go “poof” one day without warning. What, we are left to ponder, would prompt a blogger to simply erase their wonderful creation? What could have been so horrible that all traces must immediately disappear? We just cannot know. Even very large, popular blogs have died in this inglorious fashion, shrouded in mystery.

Then there are the blogs that go private. This situation, for a reader, is somewhat better, because it holds the promise that all that great content still exists and might return one day soon. But again, we don't really know.

Finally, there are those blogs that simply stop, as if frozen in time. Has the blogger given up? Have they found a preferable pastime? Are they even alive (I know of at least three bloggers who sadly are not)? Or might they return to rescue their digital creation? Fine questions all, but the answers are elusive.

So let me ask you. Why do you think so many successful bloggers decide to pull the plug? Could it be burn-out, lack of interest, or competing priorities? Or is there something else? Or someone else? Have you ever deleted a blog? If so, please help me understand. What was your motivation? Is there anything a friend could have said to cause you to preserve the blog's content?

I think a lot about the disappeared, especially when I maintain the blogrolls. I wonder if perhaps some of them still walk among us. I'd like to think they do.

Keyword Chaos: Excess Fruitcake Edition

2011-12-05T06:00:00.000-08:00

Here is another helping of those bizarre search phrases that inexplicably bring people here.

are spanking blogs rude? - No, shut up!

Barbra Walters upskirts - She's 82 years old for goodness sake. You don't even want to know what's going on up there!

Becky was caught stealing from her best friends mother, so instead of calling the police she decided to teach Becky a lesson she would never forget! She bends her over her knee and starts to spank her tushy, she then strips her hose off and exposes her nice ass. She then starts to spank her ass with her bare hand after a while she really starts to spank her ass harder and harder! - And then suddenly there was an earthquake, the dam broke, and fire rained down from the sky. Becky wondered whether it was too late to say she was sorry.

best time to spank wife - After she gives her consent

Bonnie bubble butt - Oh, here we go...

Bonnie female kinkster Chicago - Three out of four ain't bad

British boss spanks woman for not wearing underwear at work - And how, pray tell, did he uncover this heinous infraction?

can men spank lover while being on phone with wife? - No

cane Basil's bare bottom until he meows - A memorable moment from Fawlty Towers, the Lost Episodes

elder lee burl apsack disappears - Yes, but he also reappears eventually

excuses for spanking - I have to imagine there are a lot more excuses to avoid a spanking

girls' behinds are designed by nature to be spanked - My husband always says that!

give my dirty big lady arse a good hard spanking - If it's dirty, you should wash it first

her bare wet aroused randy horny bum bot botty bottom sting smart red sore cane spank - What about it?

I need a diaper change and a spanking - Would you like fries with that?

I'm underware and I touch your girlfriends pussy & arse every day - I think you've spent too much time in the spin cycle

me need spanking in Chicago - Tarzan not live in windy city

ms law spanks women for being late over her pantyhose tubes - I'll bet she'd really freak out over those plastic eggs

my husband doesn't let me wear pants and spanks me if I do - I'd like to see him wear a skirt outside in the winter

my wife and me having sex at fifty - Last time, we almost drove off the road

painful first time spanking - I hate to break it to you, but they're all painful

pet and naughty and wife and tumblr - I do not want to see pictures

plump willing bottom - ...And to my dear sister, I leave my entire collection of short-shorts

santa butt plug spank story - Hey Santa, wrong flue!

should my girlfriend pull down my boyfriend's pants down for spankings or should I do it with pictures - Are you sure there aren't any other choices?

spank your butt poems - Leave my butt poems alone

spanked at the airport - That might be preferable to being groped by the authorities

spanking horse riders - I've gotten out of the habit

spankings make my bottom sore - Really? Me too!

spanks me every morning - It's time to try a new brand of coffee

story bubble cutt naked thrashing - That sounds severe

uncle rules skirt up panties down bottom out for hairbrush spanking - Can we appeal to a higher court?

white panties dentist spanking - And THIS is for not flossing!

you will remove your panties for your spanking - If it's my spanking, I'd just as soon leave them on