Mihow

NaBloPoMo: Techanic

mihow — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 18:40:54 +0000

Just your average day here in our living room.

P.S. Don’t worry, dad. It’s not yours.

NaBloPoMo: Over Time

mihow — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 19:59:05 +0000

Drop Back.

When I lived in State College, PA, I hated football. I was a waitress at a place called Ye Olde College Diner and while I loved football weekends for the tips, I hated the actual game. It came with the territory: the more you hated football, the better a waiter you became.

Working football weekends was a difficult feat. You were groped by a drunk idiots, stiffed by an sore losers, trampled by packs of frat boys, and having to sit through all the alumni stories about how “I graduated from Penn State before you were even born!” was torturous. But I made a lot of money—and I mean A LOT of money—so I jumped at the chance to work a football weekend.

When I went to Penn State, the football team was at the top of its game. They were well on their way to what would later become a bowl game and tickets were considered paper gold. For those of us that didn’t give a damn about the game, we made a killing selling our student tickets. It was a win-win for everyone involved: I worked and served people their fried food, stickies and milkshakes for tips, at the same time they paid me top dollar for my student tickets. For this reason, I never once went to a game.

Forward Progress.

It’s a Saturday afternoon in November of 2009 and I’m 35-years-old. The TV is on in our small (but nice) New York City apartment. The sun beats in through the windows warming us on an otherwise crisp fall day. My husband of six years sits next to me on the couch tapping away on his laptop. Our son is asleep in the room next door. It’s been 12 years since I graduated from Penn State (12 years!), and about 14 since I worked at the Diner. And I’m waiting. But it’s not on tables this time.

I’m waiting for the game to start.

NaBloPoMo: My Fair Lady

mihow — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 17:24:12 +0000

If there’s a perfect season to visit New York City, it’s the fall. The sky is alive and vision feels crisper. The trees are raining with color. There’s a leafy crunch on the ground that’s not snow! I love this city in the fall.

There are also some pretty outstanding sunsets. I’m not sure why this is, but every year the fall brings with it a canvas of color. I only wish I could capture them better! Digital cameras just don’t do justice. (Or maybe it’s a user error. Yeah, probably that.)

That’s the view from our living room window. It’s pretty great, isn’t it? I mean, if you like city life. Believe me, there are many days where I’d rather have this view but this one is pretty great as well—at least for now.

I feel pretty lucky these days, Internet. And I just wanted to write that down.

NaBloPoMo: Lionel Electric Trains At Rockefeller Center.

mihow — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 18:23:03 +0000

I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned this here before, but my son LOVES trains. He’s obsessed with choo-choos. I know, that’s probably pretty common for kids his age, but trains are his favorite thing ever. That said, I wanted to extend this great opportunity to anyone living in the area. Maybe we can hang out!

Lionel Electric Trains has opened a pop-up retail store in Rockefeller Center for the first time ever! To help spread the word about the store, Lionel is inviting awesome NYC Mommy’s to a special event on Saturday, November 14th at 10 AM. The Party will let you and your kids look around the store, get a demonstration of the trains, a sneak preview of Lionel’s new CGI movie “LIONELVILLE Destination: Adventure!”, have refreshments and leave with a gift bag for your children. The only thing that Lionel asks is that if you have a good time, please spread the word via blogs, twitter or however you think is appropriate.

Space is limited so please RSVP now by emailing Emily_Saltzman [at] dkcnews.com

Lionel Electric Trains Party
Saturday, November 14th at 10 AM
The Lionel Store
30 Rockefeller Plaza
50th Street, near 6th Avenue (directly across from Radio City Music Hall)

I get the feeling my boy’s head is going to explode with awesome.

NaBloPoMo: Toddler Politics

mihow — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 13:51:31 +0000

Emory is going through a strange phase. At least I hope it’s a phase. He’s never been a really outgoing kid, but he’s always been unabashedly joyful. (Remember this post?) But recently, he’s become a great deal more introverted and shy. He’s also easily spooked and/or scared away from a situation. And I think that some of the other kids pick up on this.

Now, I’m going to try really hard to complete this post as unbiasedly as possible. I would hate for it to come off as my suggesting that my son is perfect (he’s not) and sweet and all the other kids are beating up on him. That’s not the case at all. I know firsthand that life throws at us strange relationships and confrontations; it’s natural for folks to not always get along. So I’m going to try and finish this post as neutral as a mother possibly can; I’ll present the facts and hope that someone out there has some answers.

Lately, Emory has been reacting to other more outgoing and vivacious kids’ by cowering. It happens while playing with kids he knows and doesn’t know. For example, he’ll be on top of the slide waiting to come down and another kid will come over and say MINE! (Perfectly normal, even Emory does it!) and instead of waiting or stepping aside, he’ll cower—sometimes he runs away. And more recently he’s begun to burst into tears. If he’s near me, he hides behind my legs. It’s really quite hard on my heart, but I want to teach him to face his fears and embrace confrontation in a healthy manner.

Lately, we’ve been telling him after the fact that when kids are mean to him it’s OK to say, “Please be nice to me.” He’s starting to understand more, so we want him to confront the situation instead of running to me or running away period. And bursting into tears solves nothing. Plus, it breaks my heart.

Just last night when Toby Joe asked him how his day went and he answered by telling him that a kid was mean to him.

A few weeks ago, all three of us were on the playground and one of his friends pushed him away and said, “Emory no! GO away!” And he ran away sobbing, like the kind where no sound comes out and no air gets in. As he walked toward Toby Joe and me he said, “I’m so sad, I’m crying.” It was heartbreaking. I wanted to scoop him up and protect him forever, but life doesn’t allow for that a great deal of the time, so we’re trying to introduce him to a happy medium. Does that make sense?

Naturally, I can’t help but blame myself for taking him out of school. But that can’t be it, can it? He sees and plays with other children, it’s just not always the same group of kids. Plus, he’s just two. I didn’t go to school until I was five. Certainly this can’t be that, right? It’s not like he’s not socialized.

I do hope that this phase goes away. My once joyful kid now reacts to others with wariness. And I don’t know how to help him without changing the world and I’m too busy to take that on. ;]

Has anyone else had a kid go through this? Thoughts? Suggestions?

Maybe he’s just going to be a more apprehensive kid. I’m ok with that. But I’m not ok with this manifesting itself in other ways and he thinking twice before doing something creative and carefree.

Tuesdays With Murray: My Best Friend (Ch 114)

mihow — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 13:49:04 +0000

I have had cats for the past 18 years of my life and they have all been super friendly. That’s why it always confuses me when people say that they unequivocally hate all cats. How can they possibly know that? Have they met every cat? Have they met mine? NO! And mine are awesome.

If you give a cat love and are kind to it, the cat will love you back—end of discussion. Our cats have all been cool. They are considered equal members of our family. It will remain that way forever. Our cats are wonderful.

Every cat I’ve lived with has been an equal opportunity scratch hoarder, which is to say that they never seem to care whose lap it is they’re on, as long as someone, anyone is scratching them. They’ve all been a little whorish to be honest with you.

But Murray is different. Murray seems to prefer scratches from only me. He’s a scratch loyalist. That doesn’t mean he walks away from Toby’s scratches or even Emory’s; he won’t turn them down. But when he’s looking for a lap, he almost always comes to mine.

Back up for a minute….

Toby Joe and Schmitty (my second ever cat, the sweetheart that got cancer and had to be put to sleep a few years ago) were best friends. It didn’t matter that he was mine for 8 years prior, when Toby Joe entered his life, I became second fiddle. He and Toby Joe became inseparable. Sure, Schmitty still accepted scratches from other people, but Toby became his favorite. Toby Joe admits this. It’s actually quite heartwarming, which was another reason why it was so hard saying goodbye to Schmitty. I watched my husband’s heart break as well.

After Schmitty died, I told Toby Joe that we would adopt another striped fella and turn him into another best friend. And so we adopted Murray. But Murray immediately bonded with me. I didn’t particularly do anything to gain his loyalty. It’s not like I was sneaking him pieces of bacon or pacifiers. It was that I worked from home back then and was around all the time. We bonded.

So whenever Murray snubs Toby Joe and joins me on the couch instead, I always tell Toby Joe the same thing: that I have Murray enrolled in Professor Snugglesworth’s College For Cats just like I had done with Schmitty.

“How do you think Schmitty got to be so loving toward you?” I’ll say. “I taught him that! I’m doing the same with Murray.”

But I think it’s finally time I admit something: I have no plans on letting Murray graduate. I think he’s going to be my student indefinitely.

I’m sorry, Toby Joe.

Mom It Down! Quick Rosemary Dinner Rolls

mihow — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 13:16:58 +0000

These dinner rolls have a touch of sweet, a touch of spice and a touch of homemade goodness. They’re relatively quick to make (for yeast rolls) and quite easy as well.

These rolls will go with just about anything and although I refer to them as “dinner rolls” they work pretty well with breakfast as well. (Trust me. I just finished one with a touch of butter. YUMMY.)

What You Will Need

Mixer (optional)
Muffin tins

Ingredients

1 Package dry yeast
1 cup lukewarm water
1 egg
1/4 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup oil
3 cups all-purpose flour
Chopped rosemary (to taste)

Dissolve yeast in lukewarm water.

In the mixer, add egg, oil, sugar and salt. Give that a quick stir. Add yeast and water and rotate that a few times.

Add flour. Mix it up.

Add chopped rosemary. (I use dry rosemary.)

Fill generously greased muffin tins half way and let it sit in a warm place until about double. (I have cut corners here, folks. All is well if you do.)

Makes 10 rolls.

Preheat oven to 400.

Bake for 15 minutes. You’re done!

Overcoming Obstacles

I mentioned earlier that the dough can be unruly while trying to distribute into the tins. But it does work. It might help if you slightly flour your finger tips. I used a spoon and spooned each one in. They were rough on the top, but all that goes away once they’re baked. What I’m trying to say is don’t worry TOO much about how they look before they’re baked.

If you don’t have a lot of time and you aren’t able to let them rise until doubled, you can cut corners a bit. I have put them in the oven after 45 minutes rise time. I would TRY and give them at least a half an hour to sit, however.

Variations

I feel that these would be great with a touch of orange zest or maybe even some lemon. The next time I make these I’m definitely trying some orange. They seem to ask for it. :]

As usual, please let me know if you have any questions and/or suggestions!

NaBloPoMo: ING NYC Marathon

mihow — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 21:32:45 +0000

Today is the first day of National Blog Posting Month. What does that mean? That means I’m going to try and write every single day in the month of November. I tried to do this once before (right after Emory was born) and I completed all but one day. This year I’m shooting for all 30. Wish me luck.

Today also marks an amazing international event: The ING New York City Marathon. I get really emotional during large gatherings of people and the marathon is no exception. I weep during live sporting events, political speeches, protests, marathons–you name it. I love the marathon. Every year it’s the same, I stand near mile 12; I weep, cheer, scream and clap. By the end of the day my hands feel like runner’s feet. It’s a fantastic feeling.

This year we took Emory along with us. He loved it. He sat in his stroller and watched in awe, clapping a bit. Then it was nap time and it showed on his face—the sheer exhaustion of it all, like he ran it himself.

And now he asks if we’ll take him back outside to see the runners.

“Where the runners go, Mama?”

And we try to explain to him that the race is now over—the runners have all gone home—they are eating, sleeping, celebrating and that they’ll be back next year. And I see it in his eyes as he tries to process this information and I wonder if he’s thinking that the runners aren’t 40,000 individuals running in unison, but are instead a singular entity that exists in that exact form and returns once a year like a comet or a tide of hope and human integrity.

Wanna See My Kid Eat Dirt?

mihow — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 20:10:18 +0000

Friends of ours visited last weekend. We met them for brunch and then we hit the playground because that’s what all the cool kids do after brunch. While there, something came over my son. I’m not sure if he was trying to show off for Gayla or what. But he started to imitate Cookie Monster. Here’s the video.

He’s done this before, just not with dirt.

Thoughts on ways to let him know that eating dirt isn’t how you pick up girls?

Motherf*lter: Medela Nursing Bra. My Cool Shoes. Naturepedic Sheets.

mihow — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:39:35 +0000

Edited to Add: Due to a manufacturing issue Medela discontinued the distribution of the Jacquard and Microfiber Seamless Nursing Bras.

On Boobs.

A few weeks ago, Medela sent me a nursing bra. You see, I’m supposed to be 6 months pregnant at the moment, so sending me a nursing bra to review made sense. I thought about giving it away but then I realize something: a gal doesn’t need to be nursing to wear a nursing bra. A gal just needs boobs. And I have boobs.

As many of you know, I was never able to work out the whole breastfeeding thing with Emory. I’ve written about this extensively in the past. But I did pump around the clock for five months, so I lived in nursing bras. And you know something? I still wear those bras! They are some of the most comfortable bras I’ve ever owned.

So. I decided to selfishly keep this bra for myself. And it’s AWESOME.

I’ll be honest, I was a little wary at first. I’m an underwire gal. I like a little extra support and this bra doesn’t have underwire. I was worried it would mean sagging, pain and a less than appealing silhouette. That hasn’t been the case at all. I have lived in this bra. It has replaced my ancient, falling apart bras from Victoria Secret as well as the two nursing bras left over from Emory. It’s amazing.

So, ladies, even if you’re not currently breastfeeding, I might suggest picking up this bra. It’s been very nice to my boobs.

Mama’s New Shoes.

Aren’t they awesome?

These weren’t sent to me. I paid for these puppies all my own. I just wanted to share my new shoes with the Interet. They’re made by Josef Seibel. They’re referred to as “The European Comfort Shoes”. And I can attest to that—not a single blister!

Sheets For Baby!

Emory sleeps on a No Compromise Organic Cotton Classic crib mattress from Naturepedic. It’s a bit larger than your standard mattress so standard sized sheets barely fits. It takes way, way too long to make his bed. And several of them have torn over the years. So last week I finally got around to buying sheets directly from Naturepedic. I ordered the Crib Variety 3-Pack. The flannel fitted sheet is simply wonderful. It’s plush, soft—the quality is superb. I plan on picking up a few more.

That’s it. Now I’ll return to not buying anything for a year or two.

Who’s Been Sleeping In Em’s Bed? (TWM: Ch 113)

mihow — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 00:07:35 +0000

When we got back from Florida I noticed that Em’s bed was COVERED in dark cat hair. Pookum is white (with a few brown spots) and Tucker is orange, so I knew it had to be Murray. The thing is, I haven’t seen Murray snuggle up in Em’s crib since they were both babies. So, I still wasn’t sure.

A few days ago: busted.

And he’s been busted several time since then. But Emory doesn’t seem to care at all.

(A few things: A “bappy” is a pacifier. A “binky” is the orange pillow also known as a lovie in some circles.)

New York City (Die Cut) Map

mihow — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:28:51 +0000

Check out this awesome map of New York City made up entirely of die cuts. I wonder how one might display this. If you frame it, it kind of kills how awesome it is. Suspended from the ceiling? Anyway, it’s amazing.

Mom It Down! Spelt Crackers

mihow — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:13:54 +0000

These crackers are made from spelt flour, ~~so I reckon they’re even gluten free~~. The time and money invested in this recipe is absurdly little. Gone are the days I drop 5 bucks for a box of organic crackers. These are perfect for kids! They’re also super healthy.

What You Will Need

Standard Cookie Sheet (12 x 17, I think)
Rolling Pin
Bowl
Pasta cutter (optional. Shown below.)

Ingredients

1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup cold water
1 1/2 cups spelt flour
Seeds of your choice (I used sesame)
Coarse sea salt (optional)

Mom It Down!

Preheat oven to 350.

Dissolve the salt in the cold water. Add flour and mix it up until a ball forms. Use your hands and knead it for a bit.

Take your cookie sheet and flip it over. Flour the surface. Grab the ball of dough.

Using a rolling pin, flatten the dough until it covers the cookie sheet. Keep adding spelt flour so the dough doesn’t stick.

Coat the top with cold water. If you have a spray bottle, use that. I did not so I used my hand. Add seeds and salt (if using). If you feel like it, score the crackers. (I used a pasta roller for this.) Also, poke each square a few times with a fork.

Bake as is for 20 to 25 minutes. (But make sure to keep checking it after 10. Mine usually uses 20 minutes.)

Let cool on the sheet. The edges will rise up. That’s perfect!

You’re done!

Overcoming Obstacles

The thinner you roll out the dough the better. They REALLY snap if they’re thin enough.

Also, make sure you poke each pre-baked cracker with a fork. If you don’t, you risk a great deal of sticking.

If the very middle sticks, just use everything around it and toss the very middle piece.

You don’t have to score the crackers, but they break easier if you do. If you don’t score them, they’ll look a bit more rustic. Not that that’s a bad thing!

Variations

You can use poppy seeds, rosemary, salt and/or salt crystals, ginger, garlic—pretty much anything you fancy!

Also, they are great with jelly, butter, peanut butter or (especially!) hummus.

Let me know if you have questions or comments!

(The original recipe was taken from The New York Times.)

Disappearing Hallway Cats (TWM: Ch 112)

mihow — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 00:02:04 +0000

Murray and Tucker like visiting the hallway of our apartment building. We have no idea why. But every time the door opens the two of them make a break for it. Normally, we herd them back into the apartment right away. Sometimes I let them wander a bit longer, but never for too long. I get nervous one of them will hop on the elevator. (I know—a crazy idea. But have you met Murray?) Anyway, they’re never out there for longer than 30 seconds. Unless, of course, Uncle Ryan comes to stay.

Two weeks ago, we took a train down to Florida. We gave Ryan the run of the place for the week. You see, Ryan was in China for several years. When he returned, he had nowhere to go so he moved in with my folks (temporarily!) and they live in South Jersey. So, when we go away, he likes to stay here. I guess he misses New York City.

It was right around midweek through our stay in Florida that I got a call from Ryan asking me to pop on AIM. I KNOW! What has the world come to? People are making phone calls to ask people to get online so they can type back and forth to one another? Yeah. But this time there was a reason, for this story came with pictures.

Here’s our chat. (I’m TobyJoe as I was on his computer.)

Ryan: the rest ….. i let the cats out into the hallway. tucker and murray

tobyjoe: uhoh!

Ryan: while out there, the elevator opens and it’s Debbie (?)

tobyjoe: oh no

tobyjoe: hahah

Ryan: she’s moving back across the street

tobyjoe: Did she have the dogs?

Ryan: so, she invites me in, we chat

tobyjoe: with the cats?

Ryan: well, she said it won’t be a problem, there are no dogs, but no, i just let the cats stay outside.

Ryan: anyway, so… after a bit. we leave the apartment and this is basically all I see

tobyjoe: wtf?!!

Ryan: your door, meanwhile, is completely closed.

Ryan: empty hallway, not a single cat to be seen

tobyjoe: how did they do that?

Ryan: i pretty much knew immediately where one cat was …. but tucker tried to get into the elevator when she came off of it, so i was nervous

Ryan: i must’ve left the door open a bit, tucker i guess ran in, and it closed on the return swing ….

tobyjoe: hahaha

tobyjoe: that’s Murray!!?

tobyjoe: omg

Ryan: but yeah, i assume murray found a home. but tucker? i run into the apt ….. and there’s tucker. and qianying denying she let him in. which confused me until I just assumed i must’ve left the door open …. i thought the cat walked through walls

tobyjoe: hhahhahahah

Ryan: so, yeah, leave two cats in the hallway. leave for five mins. return. zero cats.

tobyjoe: poor MURRAY!

Ryan: poor murray? he loved it in that little fort

tobyjoe: so awesome

Ryan: poor tucker. he kept running back into the apartment with the loud sounds. murray didn’t want to leave his rather nice fort.

tobyjoe: awesome. and I miss them.

Mom It Down! Halloween Cookies: Skull & Crossbones, Black Cats

mihow — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 13:25:58 +0000

I love Halloween. Actually, I love every holiday but there’s just something about Halloween. Perhaps it’s the time of year? The fact that you get to be someone else for a day? I don’t know. But some of my most fond memories take place right around Halloween. And to this day I’m unable to sit in a public library without conjuring up thousands of memories surrounding Halloween.

I first discovered this recipe 4 years ago while I was trying to find a sugar cookie base for my annual Christmas Story Leg Lamps. (Remember this?) The problem I was having was that most every recipe left me with too weak of a cookie and these cookies were to be mailed to many different people. The good news is, the leg lamp (in the original story) breaks and the father is devastated, so I just went with it. I sent everyone one large leg lamp cookie surrounded by a bunch of smaller (and therefore more stable) cookies as stuffing material.

So, while trying several different types of sugar cookies (and I tried a LOT of recipes) this recipe was my favorite. It was the sturdiest and the easiest to manage.

Since then, I’ve been using this recipe for every holiday. You simply can’t go wrong with it. If you’re a lover of holiday, cut-out cookies, I highly recommend bookmarking this baby.

What you will need

A cookie-cutter (Something spooky!)
Cookie sheet
Rolling pin
Mixer

Ingredients (For the cookie)

1 1/2 cups butter, softened
2 cups white sugar
4 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
5 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt

Ingredients (For the icing and decor)

Milk
Powdered sugar
Food coloring (in this case, black)
Decorative icing (in this case, yellow)

Mom It Down!

Remove the butter from the refrigerator. Let it sit in the mixer until it’s room temperature and easy to spread.

Add your sugar. Mix that together until it looks like this:

Add the vanilla and eggs. Stir it up!

Add flour, baking powder and salt. Stir that up. The dough will become a bit unruly for the mixer. I used my hands at that point and formed it into a big ball. Cover it with saran wrap and refrigerator until chilled.

If you’re splitting this up, you’re done. Put that in the fridge for the night and clean up!

Please note: This does not have to be done the day before, you can do it day of and let it sit for an hour or two, but I like splitting this up due to total time involved.

The next day…

Preheat oven to 350.

Remove the dough from the fridge. Cut a piece off the large ball and put that on a piece of parchment paper. Let it sit for a minute or two until it becomes a bit more manageable. Begin to roll out the dough until it’s 1/4 to 1/2 inch thick. Cut out your cookies until you have very few non-useable scraps left.

Place cookies on a cookie sheet at least half an inch apart.

Bake at 350 for 6 to 8 minutes. (Mine used up all 8!)

Let them cool until you can safely remove them without breaking them. Place them on a wire rack to cool entirely.

Decoration Time!

I mentioned before that I don’t use measurements while making my icing. I just eyeball it. If I have too much powdered sugar, I add more milk and vice-versa.

Remember: you need a LOT more powdered sugar than milk. Start small and work your way up. Trust me when I say that a little milk goes a long when when dealing with powdered sugar.

My base (just powdered sugar and milk):

Dip or paint your cookies in white.

Add black food coloring to some of the white base.

Dip or paint that onto your cats (or whatever it is you’re creating).

Let that dry.

Add the eyes and faces. Finish the scary cookies! (Thanks to TobyJoe and his many years of practice drawing skulls and penises.)

You’re done!

Overcoming Obstacles

I like to break this recipe up into a three-parter because it works out better for me that way. (First: dough; Second: baking; Third: decorating.) Just do what works best for your schedule.

Also, you can give the kid something to do too! I have these baking pens. I gave Emory one of the skull and crossbones and let him go to town on it.

He had a blast. And then he ate it. :]

Use sugar instead of flour while rolling the dough. Not too much! But it does the trick and keeps the dough from sticking.

Roll your dough out on a parchment paper. It’s much easier to manage. Some people even bake the cookies on the parchment paper instead of peeling them off and transferring them to the cookie sheet. That also works, especially if you have delicate cookies (like the leg lamps!) These didn’t need that, though. They didn’t have too many areas conducive to tearing.

Also! Feel free to freeze the dough. I did that this time so I could make more cookies as we near Halloween.

Variations

I’ve made theses using orange zest. (For Easter). I have added almond extract to Christmas cookies. I’ve also added lemon zest for anytime cookies. I’ve used half whole wheat pastry flour, (not for any other reason other than I ran out of all-purpose). It worked just fine.

As always, let me know if you have comments and/or suggestions!

On Mississippi and the Murder of a Pregnant Woman

mihow — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 15:55:37 +0000

I read this article on CNN this morning and I’m left pondering something about Mississippi’s law regarding murdering a pregnant woman and being charged for two murders.

If the murder victim was not yet visibly pregnant and the killer had no idea the woman was pregnant, does that still count as taking two lives in terms of murder?

CNN visitors: Please read the comments before jumping to conclusions about how I personally feel regarding this case and issue. Also, please make sure you understand what it is I’m asking.

Emory And Toby Joe Swimming

mihow — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 17:43:35 +0000

By far my favorite shot taken while on vacation. What kid doesn’t love swimming? Look at the joy on both of their faces! Priceless.

Nemo is one of Emory’s favorite make-believe creatures.

Murray and The Highchair (TWM: Ch 111)

mihow — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 13:06:00 +0000

For starters, I’d like to apologize for totally slacking on the blog lately. We got back from Florida late Sunday and I’ve been running around trying to get things taken care of. I have a week’s worth of laundry to do, plus cat hair GALORE to vacuum. It ain’t pretty. But I think I’m finally reaching a resting point.

For those of you who wrote me about Mom it Down: Yes, I DID have a recipe to put up yesterday. But never got a chance to do it. You see, Emory didn’t fair too well being away from home for so long. By the end of our trip he was literally begging us (in the saddest voice ever) for home. He sounded like ET. It was heartbreaking. All that said, since returning home, I’ve done nothing but make sure he’s doing exactly what he wants to do, which basically means visiting the PLAYGROUND! He missed his friends and his stomping ground, which is pretty freaking cute if you ask me. So, there’s the full-time motherhood excuse for my slackness. heh

I have some things that need to be addressed on the blog, like immediately—a few reviews for products that I was sent, an article for March Of Dimes, updates on our family life—I’m way, way behind. I have made it my duty to fix this! I hate falling behind. I promise to step it up. There is just so much to report and share, so many stories and pictures and reviews and…

In the meantime, here’s a picture of Murray who has moved away from the cardboard box, and the stroller and has decided that he belongs here now:

I think he wants to be taller. But the best part about whenever this takes place is that Emory suddenly decides he wants to sit in the highchair, which is pretty funny because Emory NEVER wants to sit in the highchair anymore, unless, of course, Murray is in the highchair. I will try and get video of that interaction; it’s awesome.

Ahhhh, brothers.

On Vacation

mihow — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 13:18:55 +0000

We are currently on vacation. “Mom It Down” will return once we’re back from sunny Florida! Pictures too!

If you feel like keeping up with our daily adventures (in 140 characters or less) visit me on Twitter

More very soon!

(This marks the first ever post written on my iPhone. This isn’t easy. I will not be making a habit of it.)

Baby Mihow.

mihow — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 18:21:33 +0000

Check me out, Internet.

On Leaving New York.

mihow — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 18:43:42 +0000

Murray lovers: I promise to have some Murray stories and videos soon. It’s been a little crazy lately and I feel like I’ve been cutting corners with the Murray stories as of late. I will make it up to you soon. Promise.

There’s been so much going on over here and I am afraid I haven’t had much time to sit down and actually write about it. But I wanted to explain (to some degree) as to why that is.

For starters, we’re heading to Orlando on Friday on an all-night train and I’m in OH MY GOD THERE’S TOO MUCH TO DO mode. I’ve been in that mode for almost a week now. I’m that kind of traveler.

You’re probably wondering: A train? Why a train?! When we scheduled this trip back in January, I had the brilliant idea that a train would be more fun for a two-year-old over something more reasonable and normal like an airplane. However, I’m willing to admit now that I’m the one who prefers the train. Flying terrifies me. Couple my anxiety with flying and Em’s inability to sit still for longer than 15 minutes and you have a flight no one wants to be on. So, in order to avoid sitting near the 20-something guy feverishly Twittering about how the family one row over SELFISHLY brought their SCREAMING BRAT of a kid onto an AIRPLANE, I booked a train for our trip.

The good news is we have a “Family Bedroom”. The even better news is Toby Joe got a pretty huge discount because he had so many Amtrak points saved up. The not so good news? We’re not sure what the hell we’re going to do with Em for 16 hours. Needless to say, I’m putting an Amazon order in today to buy as many Barney, Elmo and Thomas videos I can get my hands on.

So, there’s all of that.

Lastly, we’re moving again soon. I can’t go into the details surrounding that just yet but will in a few weeks. Forgive me for coming off evasive and weird; it’s just that we’re not sure what those details are yet, so it’s hard to write about.

Because of the impending move, Emory and I walk around a lot. It’s fall and it’s lovely and the time I have left with my favorite city is coming to an end. I know I complain about this city a great deal, but I love it. I love it like an old friend, one I share a passionate relationship with. This neighborhood is paved with thousands of memories—good and bad. Leaving here is going to mean leaving behind a great deal of my youth. But it’s for the best. It’s for my son, who teaches me each and every day that he loves the dirt and the grass and running around outside just like I did when I was a kid. Don’t get me wrong: we do that here, but it’s not perfect, not that any place really is. The thing is, I sound like a crazy person whenever we’re on the playground. I spend far too much time running around behind him screaming, “NO! DON’T TOUCH THAT!” or “PUT THAT DOWN! IT’S POOP!” He must see me as a crazy person.

It’s like, “Hey, kid! Let’s go to the playground FOR KIDS where kids can have fun!” And he’s like, “YEAH! YAY! YEAH!” And we show up and I’m chasing him around screaming things like, “NO! That’s an empty bag of crack!” or “Don’t touch the used condom!!”

It’s a playground. He should feel safe and free on a playground. But that’s just not been the case here. And I kind of want him to hold on to his youth an innocence for as long as possible.

But I digress.

I have spent a great deal of my 20s and 30s here in Brooklyn. Thing is, it wasn’t until the miscarriage did I begin to prioritize things. Losing that pregnancy made me realize how much my wanting to stay here is selfish. Now, there’s nothing wrong with that, especially if making a selfish decision creates a happier parent who in turn raises a happier kid. I’m not judging those who’ve decided to stay. But what both Toby Joe and I want for Emory, and what he seems to enjoy for himself, isn’t something we can attain here. And that breaks my heart, Internet.

And so…

We’re leaving and I’m sad about it and my head is currently in the clouds. Lately, I’ve been walking around with my son in tow reminiscing. I have lived a great life here, a spectacular life. Leaving this all behind has me wistful. I will never, ever get over New York. This city is my first love. But I realized something this summer; even if I resolve to stay here forever, it’ll always be the one that got away.

Mom It Down! Pumpkin Spice Muffins (Not So Healthy!)

mihow — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 16:14:33 +0000

Internet: I love the fall. I love it. I love everything about it—the clothing, colors, smells, foods, everything.

This recipe screams fall to me. These muffins aren’t particularly healthy. If you want healthy, try this recipe from last week. But these muffins are awesome, in my opinion. And your house will smell amazing.

(Original recipe taken from All Recipes.)

What you will need

Muffin Tins
Mixer

Ingredients

3 cups flour (I used pastry flour)
2 cups sugar
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
2 teaspoons cloves
2 teaspoons cinnamon
2 teaspoons nutmeg
1 teaspoon allspice
1 teaspoon salt
1 can of pumpkin (15 or 16 oz)
2/3 cups oil
3 eggs
1 – 2 cups of raisins

Mom It Down!

Preheat oven to 350.

Mix pumpkin, eggs and oil in mixer.

In another bowl combine flour, sugar, salt, baking powder, baking soda and spices.

Add that to the pumpkin mixture. Stir it up for a few rotations then add the (optional) raisins.

Fill muffin tins about 2/3 full.You should get an easy 12 large muffins from this recipe. I actually had some left over!

You’re done!

Bake for 20 – 25 minutes.

Overcoming Obstacles

I bet you can just dump everything into the mixer instead of messing up another bowl. I can’t imagine why it would be a problem. See the comments section, might not be a good idea.

I had a little trouble getting my muffins out of the pan last night, so if you have the liners, I might suggest using them to line the tins. I don’t like doing this because it seems wasteful if I don’t need them. But these babies did NOT want to let up. However, it’s important to add, I did not have any trouble in the past getting them free. I have no idea why last night posed such a problem. Anyway… make a note of it.

Another way around the possible sticky factor (which, remember, only happened to me once) might be to lightly dust the oiled tins with flour. Up to you!

Variations

Feel free to use an actual pumpkin. If you do, grab a small sugar pumpkin.

You might omit the raisins or add in some nuts. It’s very versatile. Also, if you want it to be healthier, replace the oil with apple sauce and use egg whites instead of whole eggs. You can literally cut the sugar in half—or down by even more. The way I came up with the healthier version to these muffins was by forgetting the sugar all together. My husband loved it. I wasn’t too crazy about it. To each their own taste! But, yeah, cut the sugar down by however much you want. Really!

Also, you can add one cup whole wheat flour to 2 cups all-purpose. I used pastry flour yesterday because I needed to clear out space in the refrigerator. But all-purpose works awesome as well.

Again, hit me up with suggestions or questions!

A Slice of Life (TWM: Ch 110)

mihow — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 00:45:38 +0000

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I just wanna peek into someone’s everyday life and see what it looks like. Because really? Everyday life is kind of boring and usual, you know?

Today, I don’t have much for all you Murray lovers; I just have this boring, as is video of what it’s like to live with Murray every day. I hope it’s OK.

It’s a little embarrassing how much I love this cat.

Mom It Down! Whole Wheat Pumpkin Spice Muffins (Super Healthy!)

mihow — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 00:37:12 +0000

OK, so here’s the skinny with this one, Toby Joe and I were kicking around over the weekend and wandered into a local eatery here called Urban Rustic. They sell local fruits, vegetables, sandwiches and baked goods.

Toby Joe doesn’t like sweets, but on Saturday he was so hungry he settled for a muffin from Urban Rustic. And wouldn’t you know? He loved it. It was perfectly healthy, barely a touch of sugar and the brown bag it came in didn’t have a spot of oil on it. All was well with the world.

A little bit more history.

Several years ago, I started making these pumpkin spice muffins. I make them every fall. They’re far too sweet for Toby Joe’s tongue, but there was this one time right after Emory was born (my brain still a bit hormonally challenged) where I forgot to add the sugar. I was bummed because I felt muffin-less and I hate wasting food. Naturally, Toby loved them. I had forgotten all about it until our Urban Rustic experience.

All that to say that today I’m going to share a variation of those healthy muffins with you today. (Next week, I’ll share the not so healthy version, which are awesome.) These muffins are not for everyone, and they definitely aren’t going to win any awards when it comes to how they look, but they sure do hit the spot if you’re craving something healthy and seasonal.

What you will need

Muffin tins
Mixer

Ingredients

1 3/4 cup whole wheat flour
3 tablespoons brown sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon cloves
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 beaten egg
3/4 cup milk
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1/2 cup canned pumpkin
1/2 to 1 cup of raisins (optional)
1 cup of walnuts (optional)
1 tablespoon ground flax (optional)

Mom It Down!

Preheat oven to 375.

Lightly oil and flour muffin tins.

Add flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, salt and spices to your mixer.

Mix up milk, beaten egg and melted butter and pumpkin in a separate bowl.

Give that good stir.

Add it to the mixer.

Stir that up a bit. (It will be lumpy.)

Add raisins, walnuts and flax seed, give it a few turns. You’re done!

Fill up six to 10 muffin tins. (I did six this weekend and it worked, but I think the next time I’ll spread it out to maybe 10. We’ll see.)

Bake for 15 – 18 minutes

Overcoming Obstacles

If you don’t want to oil your tins, feel free to use muffin liners. It’s less clean up and you don’t risk sticking.

Varations

I’ve substituted brown sugar for regular sugar. I’ve added half a teaspoon of vanilla. I’ve also used whole wheat pastry flour instead of regular whole wheat flour. The pastry flour makes for lighter, airier muffins.

Also! Vegans! These can easily be made vegan. Use an egg substitute, substitute the butter with applesauce and use soy milk instead of milk.

And dieters, if you want to cut back even more, you can omit the sugar and use splenda instead.

Hit me up with suggestions!

Zong Heng and Bai Ci

mihow — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 17:00:45 +0000

It’s my (little) brother’s birthday. He’s 30. I can’t believe he’s 30. Anyway, we can’t be with him today, but I wanted to wish him a great big happy birthday and maybe even embarrass him a little bit.

Ryan has been doing this cute as hell project on Facebook. I’ll be completely honest, I don’t fully understand it. I think he needs to explain it to me again. But it’s cute either way. This shot is my favorite. Although, this one comes in close second. Stop by and say hello!

Happy Birthday, Ryan!

Post Miscarriage: 8 Weeks Later.

mihow — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 18:10:49 +0000

It’s been 8 weeks since the D&C and miscarriage. I’ve received some email asking how things are going and I’m just now getting around to answering that question.

Physically

I’m (finally) no longer pregnant. It took a while as many of you suggested it might. And it was frustrating, more frustrating than I can possibly say, but eventually things worked themselves out. What I find most interesting about the whole ordeal is that I got back on track physically right around the same time I felt solid mentally—like really solid. There were days I hated biology with every ounce of my being (sort of like when people hate the weather when it interferes with their sporting events or vacations), but perhaps it did me a favor.

Now that time has passed and I feel better, I realized once again that body and mind are not two separate entities. Why I tend to separate the two, I have no idea. All I know is that instead of hating biology so very much, I should have seen it as a necessary mourning period. Granted, I didn’t want to hear that back then. I don’t want to hear that now. You try telling that to a woman after a miscarriage, a woman who’s had her future ripped out from under her and wants nothing more than to get that future back again. She’s going to tell you to kindly shut the hell up. And if she’s too much of a wimp to say that to your face, she’ll be thinking it.

But retrospect is funny.

Mentally

I feel like a different person. There were days back then when I seriously questioned whether or not I was going to survive. No joke! It reads a bit melodramatic now, but I really felt that way. Granted, I did suffer postpartum depression again, and to put it bluntly: that sucked. But a month or so after the miscarriage, things started to get a little brighter; six weeks later, brighter still. I’m now 8 weeks out and I feel OK again, happy even.

I suggested right after the miscarriage, that I wasn’t the same person I used to be. And that’s still true. The difference is, I wasn’t particularly pleased with that fact back then. I worried I might not like the new person I was becoming, that she might be too cynical and bitter, resentful and anxious. But I’m not. I came out OK, hopeful even. In fact, this miscarriage put into perspective a great deal that I probably would have continued to ignore had it not happened. Don’t get me wrong, I’d do anything to not have a miscarriage be a part of my history, but since it is, I’m trying to see it in a positive light. (I did the same thing with 9/11 after the initial terror wore off.)

The cliché is true: sometimes really bad things give way to great things. I’m still waiting for the great this time around, but I have no doubt it’s coming my way.

On Motherhood.

Having a miscarriage made me realize just how much I love being a mother, and that my new title in life is Mother. I’ve been a little reluctant to embrace that fact. (Why do some working women feel that motherhood is somehow less important than making money in the corporate world?) Truth is, being a mother is a full time job, and an important one at that. I’ve said as much before, outloud with conviction. But it was only after having the miscarriage did I begin to see it for myself. Mothers are responsible for molding the next generation, a generation that will likely be saving us from the mess we created.

That’s important stuff! We’re important people!

(And don’t you forget it.)

On Womanhood.

I think the second biggest realization that came from this is that I love, love, love (times one hundred thousand) being a woman.

I received a great deal of email after my miscarriage. So many of your stories brought tears to my eyes. The pain many women have endured, the heartache they’ve been through, it’s baffling how any of us are still whole and haven’t lost our minds completely.

For weeks I read stories about great loss. But no matter how different each story, there was one common thread among them all: hope and strength. Every last email sent to me held at least one of those two themes. And that saved me from my loneliness.

Looking Ahead.

Who knows what the future will bring Toby Joe, Emory and me. But I do know this: I’m making it my duty from here on out to pay your kindness forward.

To my fellow women: Don’t ever stop reaching out to one another. I truly believe that by doing so we can save lives. We’re beautiful people, us women.

(And don’t you forget it.)

Oh, Murray. You’re Lucky I Love You So. (TWM: Ch 109)

mihow — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 11:55:49 +0000

Last night we were sitting around watching Entourage when Murray came stumbling out of our bedroom. Toby Joe looked down at him and said, “What’s that in his mouth?”

When I put my hand up to his face I discovered a lot of moisture. Murray appeared to be foaming at the mouth.

This has happened to Murray before, but not for a very long time. When Murray was a baby he had a pretty bad case of ringworm. We had to give him these awful sulfur baths to try and kill the fungi.

I hated putting Murray through these baths, partly because of the smell (I was 7 months pregnant at the time) but mostly because Murray is such a happy creature and putting him through this made him look so forlorn. He’d look up at us and his eyes would ask, “Why are you doing this to me?”

It was very difficult. The thing that always gets me with animals, particularly cats, is that you can’t tell them that what you’re putting them through is for their own good. With a kid, you’re eventually given the chance to explain it, so even if it’s rough at first, someday they’ll make sense of it. But with a pet? They never understand. And I hate that.

But I digress.

Instead of putting him through the sulfur baths all the time, I often opted for the topical ointment as much as possible. And that worked for the first few weeks that he lived with us. But then one day I applied some to a big spot on his neck and he began to foam at the mouth. It was terrible! I called the vet immediately to find out what was happening. She told me it was ick mouth (or something like that) and went on to say that cats do this whenever they’re nauseated or poisoned and that I must stop using the ointment immediately.

It was back to the sulfur baths for poor Murray.

I’m not sure if it was his immune system that finally caught up, or if we sulfured it to death, but eventually the ringworm left our lives forever.

So, last night whenever my fuzzy friend came wandering out of our bedroom, I knew something was wrong. It’s not every day a cat foams at the mouth. Naturally, I freaked out.

As I watched another drop of foam fall from his mouth, he backed away from it and made a gagging sound. I thought he might be dying. But a few seconds later, a gummed up rubber band fell to the floor with a splat.

I have no idea where he got a rubber band; we’re usually very cautious given the number of times he’s had us in the ER for something similar. But I guess this one slipped through our watchful eye somehow.

This cat is either going to lead to the death of me or to the death of our bank account.

Edited to add: I could really stand to proofread this stuff before pushing it live. This post is/was an absolute mess. Forgive me for that. So much going on, yet not enough of that includes sleep.

Slacker? Yes.

mihow — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 17:26:13 +0000

It’s been a busy couple of weeks. Please forgive me for not updating much lately. There’s a really good reason. I assure you. I will divulge more information at a later date, I promise.

Naturally, I wasn’t able to bake anything as we’ve been away. So, Mom It Down may be postponed. (Unless you want to hear about the huge peach baking disaster I had, where I wasted a great deal of time, money and energy on something that seemed like a great idea in theory but failed miserably in execution. Ugh.) Anyway, I may get around to baking something today for our dinner plans, if I do, I’ll post that recipe. I just hate putting up recipes without photos, so I figure it’s best to wait and do it right, right?

Behold! The Box (TWM: Ch 108)

mihow — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 23:00:01 +0000

My husband had a book published with O Reilly and we were recently sent a box of them. I write “recently” but really that box arrived about a month ago, and like with most things we get in the mail, we left it in the middle of our foyer.

By now everyone has probably heard of Stuff Theory, wherein any new item that enters a house and ends up on the floor, couch, table, whatever and is subject to immediate feline ownership. This box was not any different from everything else. It wasn’t in that spot for five minutes before one of them claimed it as their own.

Naturally, given the pecking order here, Murray wins most of the time. He’s there roughly all day and night, getting up only to eat, drink or sit on my lap for a few scritches. But he always returns to the box.

Here’s the box:

What I can’t figure out is how the box caved in last night. It’s true. At some point in the middle of the night, Murray crushed the box.

Now, before everyone assumes that this was due to how fat he is, I am not sure that’s it. I actually think the box broke during a brawl between Murray and Tucker on who would sit on the box next. But Toby Joe thinks I’m in denial and that it’s due time to put Murray on a diet.

We put Schmitty on a diet once. It was miserable. He was miserable. We were miserable. The neighbors were miserable. I can’t imaging doing that again.

But worse? I know I have to get rid of this box as it’s collecting dust and obviously cats and I just can’t bring myself to do it.

Mom It Down! Chocolate Cupcakes With Vanilla Icing

mihow — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 16:39:46 +0000

We went to a barbeque over the weekend and I wanted to bring something unhealthy for the kids. I made cupcakes.

I’ve made two different types of cupcakes in the past and I have to be honest with you, I wasn’t particularly blown away by the red velvet cupcakes. There was something about them that didn’t quite do it for me. The vegan ones were pretty great, but they may kill you if you eat them more than a couple times each year.

Today’s recipe is another stab at the cupcake. I took this recipe from The Cake Bible by Rose Levy Berannbaum. It’s actually a recipe for a chocolate cake but I made cupcakes instead. The icing recipe was taken from Cupcakes Year-Round.

What you will need

Muffin liners
Muffin tins
Mixer (not absolutely necessary but so much easier!)

Ingredients (Cake)

1/2 cup + 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa (dutch processed but I found Hershey’s worked fine.)
1 cup boiling water
3 large eggs
2 1/4 teaspoons vanilla
2 1/4 cups + 2 tablespoons cake flour
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup unsalted butter (softened)

Ingredients (Icing)

Powdered sugar
Milk
Vanilla extract

(There are no measurements listed above. Don’t freak out! I’ll explain later.)

Mom It Down!

At some point during the day remove the unsalted butter from the refrigerator and let it warm to room temperature.

Preheat oven to 350.

Bring water to boil in saucepan, remove from heat and add your chocolate. Stir until it’s dissolved. Let that cool to room temperature. (About 30 minutes.)

While the chocolate is cooling, take the sugar, flour, salt and baking powder and add them to the mixer. Give it a stir just to mix it up.

In another bowl, beat your eggs and your vanilla.

Add a little bit of the cooled chocolate to the egg mixture. Set that aside.

Add your butter to the flour mixture and give it a good stir. Once it’s relatively coated, add the remaining chocolate mixture to that.

Mix that up until all dry ingredients are moistened. Beat for an addition 1 1/2 minutes on medium speed. (This helps build the cake’s structure.)

Gradually add in egg mixture. I poured mine in in three rotations stirring for roughly 20 seconds between each one. I don’t think this has to be an exact science. I was counting Mississippi style. :]

You’re done! Line muffin tins with liners, fill them 2/3 the way full.

Bake for 20 – 25 minutes. (Mine took only 20.)

Icing

I mentioned earlier that I didn’t add amounts to the icing ingredients. This is because every time I make icing, I always end up with WAY too much of it. This time, I froze an entire tray of pre-baked cupcakes so I could bake them at a later date. I didn’t want to store leftover icing, so I just made a little bit at a time. I hope that makes sense.

Here’s how I did it: I added a little bit of butter (maybe 3 to four tablespoons) and then a cap full of vanilla. I then added powdered sugar and mixed it up until it was a little less lumpy. I then added a little bit of milk at a time. (Maybe a tablespoon?) If it was too runny, I added more powdered sugar; too thick, more milk. This worked out much better for me. You really can’t go wrong with the icing because the only thing that can go wrong is consistency and that can be fixed super easily by adding either milk or sugar (or even more butter if you want). Basically, flavor your icing to taste and consistency. :]

Cover your cupcakes with icing or, if you don’t want the sweet stuff, lightly dust them with powdered sugar.

Overcoming Obstacles

I mentioned above that I froze a tray of cupcakes before they were baked. I wasn’t sure how this would work out, but it worked out just wonderfully. On the day I wanted to bake the second batch of cupcakes, I just removed them from the freezer, let them thaw for about 20 minutes (while the oven heated up) and then baked them for 20 minutes. I couldn’t tell the difference between the ones I made fresh and the ones I froze. I think this is a wonderful idea for people who are busy and don’t have many hours to make, bake, and ice a bunch of cupcakes. Do it in stages!

Variations

I haven’t tried anything different with this. I haven’t even given it much thought. The only thing I will say about this is that the icing is really easy to color. Just add a few drops of food coloring and you’re good to go.

As always, please feel free to give advice and/or suggestions.

Mihow

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