Remember those days when you had a drawer-full of impossibly sexy lingerie that elicited an almost Pavlovian response from your hubby? And you could strut into any business meeting on any given day with the confidence that a full-night’s sleep can give you? Well, now a baby (or two or three!) are here and things are—how can I put it—just a little bit different? I know, I know … most days you’re feeling more Superwoman than Supermodel. And between breastfeeding and those business briefs, your time with your hubby has gone the way of Santa Clause and Easter Bunny…as in, it’s mainly something you want to believe in but, at this point, exists largely in your imagination.

Sex is often the most vulnerable part of a relationship, and it can disappear in a flash (like I have to tell you that). Lighting up your libido may take a bit more work and planning than you’re used to, but the payoff is huge, and not just from a sexual perspective. Feeling close physically has a big payoff when it comes to emotional closeness as well. Here’s how to get back to hot-and-heavy heaven with your man:

 1. Don’t stop believing… or talking: Be honest in addressing the changes in your relationship and encourage him to do the same. The worst thing you can do (and will put a huge amount of distance between you) is pretending that nothing has changed. It’s ok for both of you to express both disappointment and pleasure in the changes that parenthood has brought to your relationship.

 2. Patience is a virtue, especially when it comes to your sex drive. Like any good parent, you’re both putting most of your energy into the child. Not only are the physical demands on your body taking your sex drive way down, but job pressures add another level of stress (and de-sexification) to your lives. Your libido will ebb and flow, and being in sync with each other’s sexual needs will falter more often now that you have kids.  Give each other time and let each other know (often!) that you still feel sexually attracted toward one another, even if you’re too tired to act on it. Nothing lasts forever, including this dry spell… provided you reassure each other and stay connected.

3. Schedule sex. Scheduling time for romance and sex may seem hopefully unromantic and nowhere near spontaneous, but guess what? Like everything else on your to-do list, if you don’t plan for it, you just won’t make the time to do it.  Start making it onto each other’s schedules as soon as possible because, remember—even a low flame can be resparked into a full-fledged fire. Not so once everything’s burned out and you’re only left with ashes.

4. Think quality, not quantity. Scheduling couple time will make both of you feel more loved, lusted after and connected. Accept that it may not be as often as you wish for now. But savor looking forward to that time together the way you did when you first met and may have only been able to steal away moments of time together.

Hello all, 

I am so excited to announce that Ladies Listen Up! has been chosen by The Power Player Magazine as the Editor’s Power Book Picks This October.

 Please see the link below: 

http://www.thepowerplayermag.com/ThePowerPlayerMag/Welcome.html

 Also, be sure to keep up as my Friend on Facebook and/or, My Space, whereby, you can keep up to date with my blog postings.  Fan  Ladies Listen Up!  to be a part of the video blog Coming Soon.

 10/19/09 Last week’s press:

10/19/09 – WSVA/Speaking of Live with Mike Schikman/PM Drive
Harrisonburg, VA – 7 minute interview

10/21/09 – WGEM/News Talk Live with Rich & Sydney/AM Drive
Quincy, IL – 7 minute live interview

10/22/09 – Sirius XM/Cocktails With Patrick – Live!
National Broadcast – 25 minutes live interview

10/23/09 – KLAV/Talk of the Town With Janice Malone
Las Vegas, NV  –  30 minutes live interview

Please check out all the live posted radio interviews next week at www.stephanierockey.com

Have a great day!

The Ladies Listen Up!  TV interview with Let’s Talk Live! in Washington D.C.  is posted to www.stephanierockey.com   You can order Ladies Listen Up! by clicking on the Amazon or Barnes & Noble links.   As a book reviewer said, Ladies Listen Up! is the ”ultimate relationship guide…a must read.”  You will receive straight talk on how to establish and sustain a loving, long-term relationship in today’s society.  Learn what you are doing wrong and how to make positive changes that will lead to a healthy and happy life.  As that same reviewer said, “Who can afford not to get this advice?”

   The most important reason to learn to manage your emotions is to keep your relationships with men respectful and healthy.  Manage your emotions daily by being aware of your thoughts.  A thought produces a feeling, and then produces an action.  To understand yourself, keep your thoughts in a respectful and peaceful place.  People go through a day completing routine job duties and life tasks with no feelings.  Many do not pay much attention to their daily thoughts.  If we do not have hopes, dreams, or think big, we simply achieve our daily tasks–basic human responsibilites.  If you pay attention to your thoughts, when you find you are experiencing negative emotions, acknowledge them and simply change your negative thought to a positive, more pleasant one–this will then change your feelings and emotions.  It sounds simple and really, actually is.  Just practice–and I mean practice!  You will see your life turn around to become much more emotionally independent, fun and enjoyable.

Dear Fans,

As the interest in the book continues to grow, the press requests are daily.  The short, concise writing has proven to be an effective style, and appreciated by readers.  Many want to hear more of my thoughts;  they wish I would have elaborated on some chapters.   Yes, I could have written much more; however, in today’s society of limited time, it was the most effective way to get the message out there.   Write me your questions on my blog and I will answer them.  In the mean time, go to www.stephanierockey.com and see the first TV book interview and read the most recent reviews.

In any event, I wanted to share my thoughts on Oprah Winfrey’s show yesterday.  Oprah was interviewing a surviving plane crash couple, Christian and Stephanie.  This couples story resonated so close to what I  communicate in my book.  That is:  after all is said and done, it was all about love–this couples love and the love they have for their children.  Their lives were not about their careers or their  accomplishments, but rather, the supportive relationship they provide to one another. 

The unappreciative woman that spent the day with Christian and Stephanie, learned that complaining, whining and not appreciating her children, self and family, was wrong.  She received a huge dose of reality, in that, she had much to change about her thoughts.  As I discuss in my book, when you start complaining about your life and gossiping about others, look in the mirror and focus on appreciating yourself and what you have.  Negative thoughts and behaviors are destructive and nothing good will come from them.  Sometimes as humans, we resort to negative thoughts because it is easy, and to be positive can be hard.  Also, many people live vicariously through someone elses life or, live in a fantasy world.  Stop this immediately.  Christian and Stephanie had to accept their fate and must live in reality…moment-to-moment. 

People, be grateful for your life, no matter the circumtances.  Don’t waste your precious moments fretting over past journeys and choices; rather, move forward living your life–positively and with love.  As Christian and Stephanie are doing, make a positive difference, discipline your thoughts, give and be helpful.  Love and be loved.

Best Body Magazine, New York has featured Ladies Listen Up!  The book review is excellent and clearly states what I am trying to convey to people.   Check out the permanent link below:

http://www.bestbodymagazine.com/article.html?id=260.

Hello all,

Last week was really busy getting all the final publicity, book signing tour and marketing components completed for the book release.  It has been great talking with women readers about the book and how it has helped them in there own lives.  

To further explain what the book is about, I am posting how my publicist has captured the book in the the PRESS RELEASE title, sub-title and first paragraph: 

 LESS GIRL TALK, MORE GIRL WALK:  RELATIONSHIP GURU’S ‘BIG RED BOOK’ SHOWS WOMEN SURFIRE WAYS TO GET WHAT THEY WANT

–A little black book has phone numbers.  The big red book has all the answers. 

He’s Just Not That Into You, proclaims the best-selling advice book turned blockbuster hit created by Sex and the City consultant Greg Behrendt.  And poof!  Now you’re free from your old habits of hanging on to guys who aren’t interested!  But how exactly does this “moment of clarity” help women take charge of life and relationships without having to dissect messages from men? 

     Enter Ladies Listen Up!  by relationship expert Stephanie Rockey.  The bright red jacket of Rockey’s book catches the eye, and between the covers rests the culmination of hundreds of client interviews with both men and women as founder and president of True Life Partners, a personal introduction and search company.  Each interview consisted of 388 tailored relationship questions, ultimately providing the platform for the topics covered in the book.

To read the entire press release, go to my webpage www.stephanierockey.com

Being a new blogger, I have decided that for the next couple of months, I will provide you with more information about each of the book chapters on this blog.   This information will, hopefully,  provide you with further insight, guidance and advise on life and relationships.

Ladies, establishing and sustaining a loving, long-term relationship can be very difficult in today’s society. After interviewing hundreds of men and women, I wrote Ladies Listen Up!, with straight talk, to help you learn what men really think and want from women today. Let’s talk “about men” in today’s society.