Kick me in the nuts

cock length

2009-07-06T18:08:00.000-07:00

There tends to be a lot of humor in my code because of the place where I work... I wrote this today and can't stop laughing about it...

/** */
@Column(name="cockLength")
Long cockLength; // It is Long, cause well, you know my size has to fit into it (JSS).
public Long getCockLength() { return this.cockLength; }
public void setCockLength(Long cockLength) { this.cockLength = cockLength; }

That's my name.

2009-06-13T21:09:00.000-07:00

Don't wear it out.

FasTrak: Keeping the bay area moving

2009-06-07T16:08:00.000-07:00

FAIL

new release: svntask v1.0.4

2009-05-30T22:26:00.000-07:00

My little project for a reliable, simple codebase and easy to use ant interface to subversion just got an update. Version 1.0.4 adds compatibility with svn 1.6.2 as well as a couple more commands: add, commit and switch. Enjoy.

Put The Fun Between Your Legs

2009-05-27T14:50:00.000-07:00

Looks to me like someone wasn't being very sensitive when they said "Put The Fun Between Your Legs" and got sponsorship from "SF Women Against Rape". I got a 'corrected' email a few hours later. Whoops.

Update: Apparently, I'm not the only one who noticed this.

Anus lapping

2009-05-24T16:02:00.000-07:00

George Poinar, Oregon State Univ

Since termites and their protozoa are separate animals, each new generation of termite must be united with its microscopic crew of wood digesters. To do so, adult termites secrete a liquid from their anus that is laced with protozoa and newly hatched termites lap it up.

Hadoop

2009-05-18T09:32:00.000-07:00

Everyone is buzz wording about Hadoop so I decided to check the core source code out and try to load it into Eclipse. Talk about fail. I read the wiki page for setting things up. It starts off recommending the exact eclipse subversion plugin that I don't use. Ok, that shouldn't be a problem, just check out to disk and import the project like I normally do. Ok, done.

Next problem, you have to use ant to generate the eclipse files. Um, what? Why can't you just check the .project/.classpath files in? They don't change that often and really don't need to be customized.

But wait, they do. Hadoop's eclipse integration has direct ties to running ant because it needs to generate some files which are then used as part of the classpath so that things build within eclipse. Nope, that doesn't work either. I tried.

Basically the summary is that after about 30 minutes of dicking around with things, I have no idea on how to get a clean build of Hadoop within Eclipse. This of course makes trying to contribute some code to Hadoop nearly impossible.

What really should happen is that someone needs to write some clear directions and have an easy path to setting up a working development environment. This should be a number one priority of all open source software projects. If you can't get the build down, what makes me think you can write good code?

Documentation

2009-05-11T22:29:00.000-07:00

I was just reading up on Glassfish v3. Just curious to see what it is like.

Digging around, I stumbled across this bit of documentation that kind of made me giggle...

If you look closely, the 'comma separated' example isn't comma separated.

I'm just a tad bit too detail oriented, ya think?

Twitter Just Landed

2009-05-11T22:18:00.000-07:00

So far, I haven't found a use for Twitter as I prefer posting on Facebook a lot more. FB feels more interactive too me.

However, someone came along and started processing their twitter feed for "Just landed in..." and then graphed it on a map. It looks like this:

I really appreciate Tufte style visual exploration projects.

MD6

2009-05-11T17:52:00.000-07:00

In the tech world, people often say that the online pornography business drives innovation. I think the porno business was just beaten. The newish MD6 hash algorithm was first spotted in the wild as part of the Conflicker worm and the worm authors actually updated the version of the code in use when it was discovered to have a buffer overflow vulnerability. Awesome.

gmail

2009-05-11T17:42:00.000-07:00

Have you noticed that a few weeks ago, gmail suddenly stopped remembering the "Always display images from xyz@lklsjd.com" setting? Kind of annoying. I wonder what is up.

Hibernate Gotcha #215

2009-05-08T17:58:00.000-07:00

I was getting this error when using session.createSQLQuery():

"More than one row with the given identifier was found."

No searching on the interwebs helped at all.

I have an entity that looks like this:

@Entity
public class Pornstar
{
 @OneToOne(optional=true)
 @JoinColumn
 PornstarArea area;
 public PornstarArea getArea() { return this.area; }
 public void setArea(PornstarArea area) { this.area = area; }
}

PornstarArea is another entity object.

I randomly removed the @JoinColumn and it made that error stop happening. Go figure.

The Progress Bar

2009-05-03T19:03:00.001-07:00

Felt

2009-05-01T14:05:00.000-07:00

(From the NYTimes)

You Little Bastard

2009-04-29T18:03:00.000-07:00

Places to stay?

2009-04-23T23:37:00.000-07:00

I'm looking for places to stay for two trips over the coming months.

a) A cute rental house/condo in Kauai. Ideally on the North Eastern part of the island. Hot tub or large bath tub would be nice. Something close to the action. Hopefully in view of or on the beach. 3 nights.

b) A cute boutique hotel in NYC/Manhattan. It doesn't have to be super fancy and I don't expect a big massive room or anything, but it should also be close to some action. 2-3 nights.

Thoughts and recommendations?

WB <3 TPB

2009-04-01T11:08:00.000-07:00

How to hang toilet paper

2009-03-31T14:36:00.001-07:00

Next time you have to hang toilet paper, just remember this handy lesson. You don’t want to look like an idiot when company comes over.

Put the F-ing Lotion in the Basket

2009-03-30T22:49:00.000-07:00

Lego Silence of the Lambs: Put the F-ing Lotion in the Basket. One of the most creative things I've seen in a while.

Big things squish into small packages.

2009-03-28T14:48:00.001-07:00

My new sleeping bag fits in this tiny little watertight package. Thankfully, this was all free with my REI dividend. =)

22 college students cram into a phone booth

2009-03-26T22:15:00.000-07:00

This March 1959 LIFE magazine photo by Joe Munroe shows 22 Saint Mary's College students crammed inside a telephone booth. (Joe Munroe / Courtesy to The Chronicle)

Viagra

2009-03-26T14:37:00.000-07:00

I got this rather creative piece of spam today...

Ah... tax season...

2009-03-26T09:00:00.000-07:00

Topic 357 - Tax Information for Parents of Kidnapped Children

You may claim a kidnapped child as your dependent if the following requirements are met:

The child must be presumed by law enforcement to have been kidnapped by someone who is not a member of your family or a member of the child's family, and
The child had, for the taxable year in which the kidnapping occurred, the same principal place of abode as the taxpayer for more than one-half of the portion of such year before the date of kidnapping.

If both of these requirements are met, the child may meet the requirements for purposes of determining:

The dependency exemption
The child tax credit, and
Head of household or qualifying widow(er) with dependent child filing status.

This tax treatment will cease to apply as of your first tax year beginning after the calendar year in which either there is a determination that the child is dead or the child would have reached age 18, whichever occurs first.

Her Rude Monkey

2009-03-26T08:54:00.001-07:00

Piledriver

2009-03-26T08:50:00.001-07:00