I’ve mentioned before that I’m scared of having a girl. It shouldn’t be surprising to anyone who knows me very well. I’m a sucker for a cute smile. I’m afraid this little girl will own me with her very first glance. I hope she does. I can’t wait to hold her. I’ve never once thought about what it would be like to have a daughter before now. I’m not one to sit and imagine things like that. I’ve tried my best not to imagine my child as either a boy or a girl prior to finding out what we were having. I’ve lived around guys my whole life. I have two brothers and I’ve had guy roommates. Aside from my mom and my wife, I’ve never lived with females around. I really don’t know what to expect.

We’ve kinda come up with a name, but I’m not supposed to talk about it yet. We’re still settling on a middle name. She’s gonna be cute no matter what.

I can’t wait to see what kind of big brother Thrasher is going to be. I want even more than ever to make him a permanent part of our family. He’s such a great kid. We are so very blessed to have him.

I haven’t written in my blog like I always intended. Life gets so cluttered. I’ve got my insurance job, my web development company, my podcast, my church and most importantly my family. I stay pretty busy. If only more of them could actually produce income too. Regardless, I’m very blessed by everything in my life and I wouldn’t change a thing. God has given me more than I could ever imagine. There were times where I wondered if He even remembered who I was. The truth is, God never forgets us and He never leaves us.

Thrasher has been great. He’s growing and crawling and climbing and teething. All fun (except the teething) things which keep us on our toes. He’s had two visits so far with his mother since he came to live with us in October. She hasn’t shown up for either of the visits. I pray now that God will protect him from her. It’s pretty obvious to me that there are things in her life more important than him. That shouldn’t be. While she’s his biological mother, she’s proving that she’s not worthy to be his mother. He’s got a wonderful mother right here in our home. Though we may not be able to keep him forever, we will care for him like he’s ours every single day that he lives with us. We really would love to adopt him if it comes to that but there are so many factors that can affect the situation. We will just pray for God’s protection and love for his life.

Near the end of last year, my good friend Wes asked me to help him on some web development stuff he was doing. He’s been in that business for several years on his own and he knows that I have a little experience, especially with Wordpress. I jumped at the opportunity to make some extra cash and learn a little from a great developer. After completing the project Wes invited me over to his house. I wasn’t aware of what was in store for me when I got there. Wes and I sat down and he invited me to partner with him in his business. He is still only part-time at this but is looking to take it to the next level. He really felt like he needed someone else to do that with him. Though I’m not nearly as experienced as he is, he felt my ability to pick up new ideas and learn would quickly make up for that. I’d say my experience in other areas too, such as sales, customer service and tech in general will be a great asset. Together we decided to form Freedom Development Group. We’ve already worked on several projects together and have a lot more in the pipeline. I’m excited to start this new adventure. Regardless of if this can turn into a full-time job or not, this is a great opportunity for me to make money more money, pay off debt, learn new things and do something I really enjoy.

I’d have to say I’m liking this a lot more than computer repair and servicing, which is what I mainly did in the past. I’ve wanted to move away from that and into more development for a long time. I can work in my own space on my time without someone sitting behind me watching every move and asking a ton of questions. It’s good to have someone as smart and experienced as Wes to help me develop my skills. It’s also great to have someone with his moral values and business principles to work with. Those are rare commodities these days. We’ve developed a great friendship and has made it easy for us to work together. Though I’m sure there will be times we don’t agree 100% on things, we are the types of people who can work out differences and work together.

Finally, Haiti, the real inspiration for writing today. Unless you live in a cave you know that this week Haiti was hit by a massive earthquake. The death and destruction is horrendous. My feelings for Haiti run deep into my soul. It was on a mountaintop in a remote Haitian village that God healed and forever changed my life. I will always hold it as a special place regardless of how the rest of the world views it.

The common view of Haiti can be summarized by something someone said to me when they heard I was going to Haiti back in 2006. He said, “Haiti is a good place to be from… FAR FROM.” Of course, with political turmoil, economic disparity and utter poverty at every turn, Haiti is not somewhere people go to relax and get away. No one thinks of it as paradise. It’s not a tourist destination like Jamaica or the Bahamas. But it is a beautiful country, full of life and people who are full of love. Yeah, there is crime, corruption, gangs and violence. All the typical things you will find in a country stricken by poverty. But in the heart of most Haitians there is love, peace, family, community, art, and faith. Most of all, the people of Haiti are PEOPLE just like you and I.

Before this earthquake, there was massive need in Haiti. As the first nation comprised of freed slaves, throughout their history they have struggled. I’m not trying to get all political about this but there is truth in the stories that their nation has been kept in poverty by politics, corruption and the chains of debt. Now suddenly, all eyes are on Haiti. I’m saddened that it took this disaster to cause this awareness but I hope that in this disaster, people will make real commitments to help these people build a future. I’ve decided to renew my personal commitment to Haiti. Not just for relief from this disaster but a life-long commitment to support and pray for the individual lives in Haiti. The people who God loves and sent His Son to die for.

The moment I heard about the earthquake, I just wished I could just go there. As I look at pictures and read articles about the situation, I wish I could just be there to do something. I know that’s not possible but I can do something. There are many ways to support Haiti. Our government has just issued money to go to Haiti from our tax dollars. I don’t believe that’s what out tax dollars are for. We, as individuals, should be the ones giving. Giving more than our government could ever dream of giving. We should commit to give often, not just now in the middle of a crisis but continuously to support growth. Money given through charities gets used faster than money passing through governmental buracracy and a higher percentage of that money actually hits the ground and works to help change lives. Give now and give often.

If you wish to give, you can give in the following ways:
The Red Cross is always a great place to start.
My brother’s friends have a ministry in Haiti called Brent Gambrell Ministries.
My friend Marco has a clothing company, American Dance Party, which is selling t-shirts which all profits go directly to Haiti.
Beyond Borders is another organization in Haiti that I support.

I can share some details but not too much. I obviously can’t give you the story of his family but I’ll share all I can. Just in case you don’t follow my twitter or see my facebook, I’ll explain the rules. We’re not allowed to post pictures or names of our foster kids. We are going to come up with a nickname or as my buddy Daniel put it, a code name for him so we can talk about him online without just calling him “boy” or something impersonal. I’ve been saying “little man” or “little dude” but I don’t want to use that permanently because if we have other little boys in our home, I’m sure I’ll use those words to talk about them. That would just get confusing. If I know you in real life, I will gladly email you a couple pictures if you leave a comment on this post.

The baby arrived with the social worker Thursday evening. He’s an amazing kid. He’s about 5 months old and I feel we have been blessed by God to have him living with us. The moment I met him, he smiled and laughed. I knew he was special the moment I saw him.

Though nights have been rough, since we’re not used to babies, the happy times far outweigh anything negative. He’s funny and happy. I hear sounds in my house that I’ve never heard before. The little sighs and giggles are foreign to me but I love to hear them now. Sometimes, when you hold him, he reaches his arms as wide as he can and you feel like he’s actually trying to give you a hug. He’ll grab my beard and push his face against mine. He’s my boy. I love him and though I know I may not have him forever, I pray that his life will be a better and happier life as a result of his time in our home.

We are blessed.

While she was here she mentioned a few times that we should be getting a call at any moment. How exciting and suspenseful! She helped us know the right questions to ask when they do call. We also learned that though we’ve asked for children 0-2, they will call us and ask us if we’ll take older children and if we’ll take more than one child. We just need to be prepared to say “no”.

We won’t have a child for at least a week and a half because tomorrow morning we are leaving on vacation. Jessica’s parents have been gracious enough to invite us to stay with them in Blue Ridge, GA at a cabin they rented for the next week. With all the expenses we’ve undertaken, there’s no way we could have afforded a vacation this year. Luckily we’ll have this last getaway before we begin our adventure in foster care. I’m really excited. The next few weeks should be interesting.

I hope to write more here and use this space to chronicle my thoughts and experiences in foster care. There are a few rules. Unfortunately I can’t post pictures of any children we care for and I can’t write their real names. So I’ll be making up names for the kids we care for just so I can still talk about it all. We are starting with only one child age 2 or under. We’ve learned what to expect. We don’t expect to get a perfect kid. We know that the child may be hurt, even at such a young age. We’ve been learning tools to use in helping the child to behave and be happy. We’ve been learning about working with the natural parents, the case manager, and guardians. There’s a lot of things that we have to do, but every single bit of it is worth it if it means one single child will be blessed by it.

People often say things about fostering that really frustrates me. I will try not to rant to much about this but I hope it will help you to think a little about your attitude towards fostering. The number one response that drives me crazy is when someone says, “oh I couldn’t do that, it would just break my heart when I had to give the child back.” You are saying you wouldn’t want to help a helpless child because you are afraid it will “hurt”? Are you serious? If you would care that much for the child, you are exactly the type of person these foster kids need!

I hope I can share some great stories with you as we move forward. Realistically, we could have a child in less than 2 weeks. Everything will change in my life, I know that. Hopefully as a result, everything will change in the life of a child too.

We arrived late Thursday night. Picked up some groceries and just went to bed. Friday was a perfect day though. We had a great breakfast and headed out to the water. We unloaded the jet skis and spent hours on the water. Saturday, Wes and I headed back to Lakeland for the Tea Party down by Lake Mirror. It was raining both at home and at the lake house so we didn’t miss out on much back at the lake. We did have a great time at the Tea Party. Check out what my buddy Jared wrote about that along with some pictures. By the time we got back to the lake it had finished raining. So we were able to go back outside and enjoy the day (and the jet skis) for a little while until the rain returned.

Sunday we were able to spend some time in the water again between the rain. Then we had to clean and get ready to come home. After stopping at Woody’s for dinner, we drove home. Today I’m just tired. I slept a ton last night but I still feel worn out. We had such a blast though. It was great to get away and to hang out with the Grimes.

It’s my birthday. Yay!

A week, well almost 2 weeks ago on a Saturday, with our church, I helped paint a house for an older lady in a low-income area. She was so sweet. She cooked us all breakfast while we painted her little 700 sq ft house. It was great and she was so happy. I love our church because they are commited to doing good things for others.

Today Jessica and I visited a doctor and learned that everything is functional in the repro. dept. So we’ll just keep working on it. Hopefully we’ll have a new Kelso on the way before we even know it and Team Kelso will have a new member.

Speaking of our church, I’ve been playing guitar more lately. Once the regular musicians are back from summer tours, I’m sure I’ll play a little less often. It’s been great though. I’ve been singing the harmonies, which I love to sing and harmonize.

We are also taking classes to become foster parents. Of course, if Jessica gets pregnant, we’ll have to put it on hold. We really want to help needy children though. If you know either of us very well, you know that we have a deep love and a huge heart for people, especially children, who are in need. There are so many people in this world who are in need merely because they were born in a certain part of the world or to a certain family. Children have no control and I will always love them and want to see them have hope.

Oh, one more thing, I posted some music from my old band. So if you like punk rock check it out. If you don’t like punk rock, well, I’ve put 6 of my own songs up there too so you might like to hear them. http://drop.io/dboymp3 Hope you enjoy it. (fyi, this link may not work after 12 months, in case you are reading this in the future)

Our government claims to be fighting a war on poverty. The 20th century was marked by this war but what progress was made? Why have we never seen any progress? In human history, there has never been a government that was ever capable of eliminating poverty. I fundamentally believe that is not the role of government by definition. History shows throughout all of time that no government has ever solved the issue of poverty. More than not, they have worsened it.

Every time I write my tax check (I have to pay my own taxes as an independent contractor) I think of all the families I could help. I think of all the things I could do that would really make a change in the lives of others. I would like to make the decision where my money goes and who it helps. That’s my job, not theirs.

The world is full of need. From the family in my home town that can’t pay rent to the children in India, Thailand and Nepal forced to become prostitutes, the need is never-ending. It’s not a political argument. It’s a social argument. We, the people, have a responsibility. When we turn this responsibility over to a government, we effectively give up on change ever occurring in the world. We also deny ourselves the responsibility and the personal accomplishment of making change in our world. Government is not going to change. They will continue to slurp up power like a 6-year-old eating Fruit Loops.

My view is that as a Christian, I am dependent on Christ alone. His church is called to feed the poor, to help the widow, to visit the prisoner. Our churches have failed. These are issues that can and should be solved by the church. If our churches would stop worrying about building $5 million buildings and actually reach out to the people in this world, we (the church) could solve the problems of poverty and need. Unfortunately we’re too busy arguing over if you can lose your salvation, or if you can speak in tongues or a multitude of other things that don’t make a difference.

Also, I’m saying that while the church spends so much time “arguing” they could unite under Christ, work together and actually effect change in this world. I know from experience, lots of experience, that many churches will not work together with someone outside their own church or denomination. It’s sad and disappointing because our call from God is to “go” into all the world. Meanwhile we’re too concerned with keeping our circles and boundaries intact.

The church as a whole has allowed consumerism and love of “things” to overcome their love for others. I do feel that one day Jesus will ask us what we did with what He gave us. I don’t think He’ll be very impressed when we show him our super-giant-mega-churches. I grew up in what was once the largest church in the state of Florida. That church does not exist today. I understand the “idea” of the mega-church but I also feel much of the spending that goes on as a result is very wasteful. It causes a debt that binds the church and keeps it from effecting real change in the world, even those with the best intentions. There are many great ministries doing great things. When a pastor drives a luxury vehicle though, there’s a problem of materialism and excess living. I don’t care if the money came from the ministry or personal investments, excessive living is excessive living. Where is the humility in that? What reason will you give the Lord when He asks for your account of why you used his blessings to indulge in your own excessive desires?

I want more than anything to see people in need have their needs met.
I want more than anything to see the broken lives in this world made better.
I want more than anything to see mothers and fathers provide for their children with independence.
I want more than anything to see families and children of every nation have clean water every single day.
We can do this.
We MUST do this.
Will you stand before God and tell him, “No Lord, I didn’t. I thought the government was going to do it.”?

I invite you to please read Matthew 25:31-36