Do it well like Addison and Oliver’s parents. They seemed to handle these children with such love and confidence and make first-time parenting look easy. They are a special team, and these two blessings were a joy to photograph!

Grandma made these too cute hats for them…

My mom always told me that everything was better when I was there. That experiences were more fun and that she enjoyed herself more. That I brought something to the atmosphere like no one else could do in her world. She always made me feel so good about myself.

And then yesterday, Bella, Luke, and I played cards. Bella has recently learned Old Maid and Crazy Eights and Go Fish. Coming from a family whose core includes playing games, it melts my heart to see how much Bella loves to play. As we played, Bella kept cracking Luke and I up. She is wonderfully expressive, and the way she would squeal when someone took took the old maid from her or when she had just the right card to play, made Luke and I laugh so hard. She got excited about everything. She laughed hard. She played well. She was kind.

After I finally stopped laughing at one of her squeals, it came out naturally. “Bella, you make everything so much fun. It is always so much more fun when you are around.” And then I actually heard myself. I heard my mom in myself. And I remembered how my mom made me feel. But in that moment I was also aware of how my mom must have felt. I had to take a pause to feel this. To feel how much I adore this treasure of a child. How amazing I think she is. How terribly proud of her I am. How my life is 1000 times better with her in it. How she makes me laugh. How she teaches me new things. How she helps me know my mom better even five and a half years after her death.

I could go on and on here about how I adore Bella. When I asked God for a daughter, I never imagined that He would bless me with one so great. My life with her is better than I ever knew could exist. And on January 30th, she turned four. In the week before her birthday, out of the blue she would squeal and clap and shout “I am going to be four!” Oh to be excited about getting older!

At one of her three recent birthday celebrations, she received cowgirl boots. As grandma Lisa and I were sitting on the couch visiting, Bella was enjoying her new boots. Once she noticed me taking her picture, she came alive with a variety of unprompted poses. All these photos were taken within a minute and ten seconds of each other! She is a natural…

Grandma Lisa arrived with a party hat she made for Bella as well as a Tinkerbell cake and fairy wings. She knows how to bring a party!

We have a local favorite place to go called Stabby’s Cafe (awesome breakfasts!), and we went there for a birthday breakfast. Bella and Abe were both sick and tired and it was not what we had hoped for, but fun nonetheless. Abe did not want to cooperate for the camera, and two seconds after I took the shot of him creating a fork/glass tower, he flung his fork across the table and spilled Bella’s entire glass of juice everywhere, making us the restaurant favorites. This parenting thing is a piece of cake…

Our final party of the weekend and Bella requested a princess cake (of course!)…

I know it is a lot of images of my Bella, but sometimes I have just got to be an over-proud mom who wants to show off her kids! Thanks for hanging in there with me.:)

“Should we?” they thought. And then the truth became clearer than the excitement of the moment. The truth that they treasure their family and friends dearly, and could not imagine commiting their lives to each other without them there. The truth that while this is a special moment between two very private people, it was important to open their hearts and love, and take the day to show everyone what they mean to each other. So they boarded their flight home to Minneapolis and continued on with their wedding plans.

Then January rolled around and their big day arrived, and Jess and Brian dedicated their lives to loving each other. They never wandered far from each others’ side. They kissed {a lot}. They were completely in tune to the other. They laughed and danced and gazed into each others’ eyes. They were connected in a way one rarely gets to see. In a way that only two independent and capable people whose lives are happier because of each other can connect. It was wonderful. And all their loved ones were there to share in their day – which made it all the more special for Jess and Brian.

Thank you Jess and Brian for letting us be a part of your day. You have a wonderful way of putting forth the effort to create beautiful things while still maintaining perspective and fun attitudes. You are two wonderful people whom I hope can come over for dinner and wine and friendship when this whole business relationship is complete {Well, you can all have wine – give me another five months!}! Many blessings to your future, which I know will be nothing short of wonderful…

I was so in love with Jess’s jewelry for the day {she has amazing taste in everything!}. The jewelry was designed by Meg Lammers of MEG Jewelry, and Jess purchased it at bridiesbaubles.com. It was so gorgeous that I want an excuse to buy and wear this, but for some reason a pregnant mom of two young children at the grocery store just doesn’t seem to fit this jewelry. Oh well.

Jess and Brian wanted a day full of candids and shared moments between loved ones, so we really didn’t do many posed images. But my Luke managed to sneak one in while hanging out with Brian. My, oh my, Brian is so handsome and confident.

This is Jess’s reaction to Brian when she saw him at their first look. She was so emotional and excited, and about a half a second after this last frame she was almost running to him. It was very touching to see their joy in each other, to say the least.

And we couldn’t forget Gavin – one of the nicest little boys I know! He was so ga-ga over Jess all day long…

Her beautiful bouquet was from Richfield Flowers and Events.

The weather was frigid that day {high of five degrees!}! They were such good sports to step outside for a minute so I could get a few shots in the entry. I cannot decide which of the two images below I like better, but they are both two of my favorites from the day…

We almost didn’t do any group shots {again, Jess and Brian LOVE the candid moments best}, but I am so glad we did. This is such a fun group of people, and their group shots, although “posed,” were still very relaxed. Perhaps a bit too relaxed…

The atmosphere at the Campus Club for the reception was so perfect. Elegant and not overdone – Just like Jess and Brian. Richfield Flowers and Events did an amazing job on the lighting.

Dear family friends of Brian’s won the “Married the Longest” dance, and I think you can tell that Jess and Brian were thrilled…

Final note – these two are amazing dancers! So good, that when Luke and I left and got in the car, Luke turned to me and said, “Wow, Brian can really dance!” What a fun day…

Something a little deeper happened for me when I was editing Owen and Elijah’s images. Owen is just three and a toehead like my little Abe. When I was editing images of him there were times that I felt like I was looking at my own son. His little ear. His blond hair. His cute feet. The furrowed brow. Having a little boy is one of the greatest gifts God can give a mother, and to be so close to Owen’s images really made my heart tug about my own little gift from God.

And then there is Elijah. In six months I will have a little newborn too, and it was so fun for me to dream about snuggling and kissing my new baby, and since it is someone else’s newborn I can be in denial about all the bits about being up all night and getting spit up on all the time!

I did a couple 20×20 collection prints for their parents to look at and I love how they came together! My, what beautiful children…

When I photograph kids and weddings, I don’t have the luxury of time. I don’t get to stand there and putz and think and re-do. I just have to go with my heart and my gut and my experience – and it is a thrill. But last Saturday I got the thrill of himming and hawing over how to make a cast iron pot look cool. And I loved it {I know that I am in the right profession when I think that that was fun!}

You have heard me mention simplyneutral before. Not only do I have the pleasure of being their photographer, but I am also a big believer of their products and love using them in my home. {No worries, I will not give you my pitch here again as I have done in past blogs – just so you know, I profit nothing from their sales – my thoughts are just straight from my heart.} Anyway, they are making some exciting changes to their brand! I will not give anything more away because it is top secret {I just made that up to make myself feel cool and it kind of worked}, but here is a little sneak peek for now. By the time you see these again they will look quite a bit different…

So today when he did another shrill frustration scream, he and I had a chat. I again told him that screaming was not ok and that he had to talk instead {which he does quite well by now}. I told him that when he gets frustrated he could make a “grrrr” noise and clench his teeth and fists to blow off some steam. I did this for him a couple of times.

Grrr. Teeth and fists clenched. Grrrr. Teeth and fists clenched. See? Easy. Frustration gone.

Then I asked him to try. He did exactly as I had just showed him with a little added pre-learned twist. Grrrr. Teeth and fists clenched. Stomp foot while saying a frustrated “dammit!” under his breath. I was so surprised that I had to turn away to conceal my laughter. {Let me just interject at this point to say that in no way do I condone children swearing and in general do not find it funny – but really- when your child says a minor swear word and executes it so perfectly, it just takes you by surprise and you have to have one of those hiding-your-laughter-because-it-is-wrong moments!} I was at such a loss for words that our conversation just ended. For lack of a better strategy I decided to accept the screams for the rest of the day and ponder over a better response for next time. After all, the screams were better than his alternative. Just another fine parenting day…

So this post doesn’t go photoless, I am including a photo from when we went to see Cinderella at the Children’s Theater on December 31st. Notice Abe’s new haircut and my cheeks getting chubbier…:)

And then one day in late-December I was walking into Chipotle and I was giddy. The kids and I were spending the day with some of our dear friends and I went on a Chipotle lunch run for my friend and I. And I was suddenly conscious of feeling joyful again. That moment is so clear in my head as I parked the car and walked in the snow to get our goodies.

The snow was falling so beautifully – what a blessing. I got to eat Chipotle for lunch – what a blessing. The kids were happily playing with their best friends and I got to hang out with one of mine for the day – what a blessing. I was not tired – what a blessing. I had survived my first trimester with a 2- and 3-year old and a major cold – what a blessing! Yes, I was giddy. As in giggling to myself while waiting in line and chatting with the people behind the counter and singing loudly to the radio my whole drive back to my friend’s house. My life was good.

But the funny thing is that my life was good the entire time and I knew that. I just couldn’t feel it. I didn’t have the mental and physical energy to feel my life. I was just surviving. And now I get to live again. To have the energy to play with my kids. To kiss my husband. To stay awake for life…At least until July when I am up feeding a newborn all night! Hum…I had better take full advantage of it while I can!

Part of “waking up” means that I get to work again (yea!). Since I am thinking of joy and friendship I wanted to post a couple images that go on that same theme from a wedding we shot on Saturday. Beautiful Jess was so joyful and giddy on her wedding day, and this moment she shared with her friend makes me smile…

You see, I like the truth and I am very open about myself, my life, and my feelings. When life is easy and good, this is easy and good. But when God gives you challenges it can be difficult to be so open.

And I was not sure if I wanted to be open here. With you. Because I don’t want you to have a bad impression of me. But in the end, it is not who I am to hide things. So here I go…

Several weeks ago I took the test that would change our family’s life. The little window said “pregnant” and removed all doubt about whether or not we were going to have a third child.

And this is where the story gets hard. Because I cried when I should have laughed. Because I got depressed when I should have been overjoyed. Because we were really, really, really happy with just two beautiful children. And I told myself over and over again about what a blessing from God this is. And I knew how many people there are in this world who would give anything to get pregnant. And I knew that I was carrying a baby that I needed to send good thoughts to. And logic told me all of these things were true. But my heart had not felt it. So I added guilt for the truth of my feelings to everything else.

And this truth {along with being quite sick for two weeks and pregnant-exhausted!} left me in a dark place. I did not like myself and thought that you might not like me for these feelings too. And I just could not face my blog for a moment. Until I collected my thoughts.

Then today I woke up feeling not as tired. I was not coughing as much. And I saw my baby for the first time.

And I fell in love.

The ultrasound showed its little legs and arms and it was moving around. At only two months pregnant, this tiny being inside me looked like a baby. And I knew that this was my child. My gift from God. Another joy in our life. And I felt happy. I felt connected and like I already have three kids. And like I know that it will be ok.

Falling in love is a funny thing. We cannot always control how it happens, and sometimes the road to get there is difficult. But when it happens, it is wonderful.

Now that you know my journey, I must tell you that I can honestly say I am thrilled to let you know that little baby Thompson will be born sometime in very early July!

That God is a funny guy…

1. I am going to LA for a bit and she has to wait that much longer to see her images.

2. She is such a great sport that she was willing to jump high in the air on a tiny trampoline over 20 times to try to get a cool airborne shot! If any of you think that modeling is easy and watch America’s Next Top Model and think that you can do those crazy poses, please call Emily and she will let you know that it is much easier to do these in your mind while sitting on the couch watching other people do it!:)

Thanks for a great day, Emily and Sue! See you when I get back from LA…

And this one is for you, Emily, as I know that you were excited to see one of these. You are so beautiful!

When it was time to go, we all said our goodbyes and gave hugs and then went our separate ways. And I came home and was swamped with work and forgot all about the images from that party. Yes, they say that your memory is the first to go.

Then for some reason, last night out of the blue I remembered that I took photos at that party and never saw them again. This morning I frantically found all my old memory cards and one by one looked at the images they contained until, finally, I found the images from our party {whew!}.

I feel in love with two of the images of my niece, Madison, so I thought that I would quickly share them with you.

More posts {and my cool story!} to come soon…

I have yet to get a really good updated image of my own family {where does the time go?}! At the party, I asked someone to take a photo of us, and sadly, this was the best of the bunch {To no fault of the photographer}!

At least I got a cute one of Luke and Bella…