tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806Sun, 03 Jan 2016 14:19:21 +0000FelixparentingRichiepicturessleepspinal dysraphismFELIX: THE FIRST PREGNANCYillnessrantFELIX: THE SLEEPLESS DIARIESTHE SECOND PREGNANCYhusbandspina bifidaSouth Africahumourbaby milestonespoliticstantrumscrimesocialisingguiltjohannesburgspecial needsworkfriendshipgrammarmenpetsthings kids saydisabilityhappinesssiblingsbirthdaysgender rolesgood newsschoolThreedoctorsfoodgrommetspollreligionshameless use of blogteethingwritingQueenyThe Southbirth ordercatheterisationgratitudelovebirthbloggingbreastfeedingconspicuous consumptiondeathgrandparentsillness. parentingindependenceseparation anxietyshynesstoddlertoilettwo years oldBotoxSA Blog Awards 2009SA Blog Awards 2010TVXhosabook reviewbraveryholidaysjealousylanguagemedical stuffpeer pressurepersonal responsibilityRed Cross Children's HospitalThe One Year Planbullyingcharitychidlren's rightsfamilyguest postslies parents tellnamesnature vs nurturepaid postspottyrestaurant outingsself-esteemshoppingsmokingstem cell storagetoys"Obscene and not heard"? So 2008. <i>Dis jou ma se blog die</i>, where what doesn't kill you makes you funnier.http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (Margot)Blogger483125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-5904661095015529245Sun, 03 Jan 2016 14:19:00 +00002016-01-03T16:19:21.206+02:00 Since Facebook introduced its "Memories" feature, my trademark (and, it turns out, probably genetic, my poor dad is struggling with it) poor memory has a brand new aid. I enjoy it very much and have realised, thanks to Facebook, just how many December weeks have been spent over the past few years at my mom's very convenient (and free) "Ouma's Cape Town house". We had a family wedding to go to, http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2016/01/a-holiday-in-cape-town.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-8373613574282235302Mon, 16 Nov 2015 15:41:00 +00002015-11-16T17:41:06.226+02:00 No I can't believe it. Every day he is loosening up and away from me, reminiscing with me about how "shy" he used to be and laughing at himself, getting further into a world of school rules and new sports and budding social skills (at which he doesn't suck). Before my eyes Felix has become a boy whose face is all angles. He loves Minecraft - I don't even understand what it is. Right now he is http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/11/felix-is-seven.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2226384352686624804Fri, 16 Oct 2015 10:10:00 +00002015-10-16T12:10:57.212+02:00 Among the crosses some disabled kids seem to have to carry is the disproportionate compulsion to miracle-monger. After my morning with Richie, I would just like to assure all and sundry: https://imgflip.com/gif/alnbb http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/10/among-crosses-some-disabled-kids-seem.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-4965165224136782932Fri, 09 Oct 2015 06:35:00 +00002015-10-09T08:35:08.316+02:00 http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/10/school-concert-and-grade-1-certificate.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-5807602301856654239Fri, 09 Oct 2015 06:34:00 +00002015-10-09T08:34:22.224+02:00 Apparently a phrase that raises anxiety levels for man: school sports day. For me, historically, not so much. During my schooling, I (believed I) sucked, and my parents were neutral about it, so I ran the race or two I was instructed to, came second-last to last, and that was that. Felix is surprising me by being far more willing to experiment with school sports confidently than I ever was. Hehttp://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/10/school-sports-day.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-4627990052515150623Tue, 28 Jul 2015 08:18:00 +00002015-07-28T10:44:56.827+02:00 We're building Legos, which Richie loves doing. But he loves tinkering with little pieces, me, I like to construct the thing according to the instructions in the box and get it 100% right, squashing his nascent creativity and preparing him for a life of corporate drone-dom. These orientational departures led me to muse, speculatively, that wouldn't it be a good idea to have some shelves in http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/07/shelving-issues.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-4241076723662847408Mon, 06 Jul 2015 10:52:00 +00002015-07-06T13:07:05.123+02:00 We went on a Paris break without the children. These things become possible eventually. As my mom (who shouldered a large part of the childcare burden along with Grandpa John and Auntie Queeny) said, every passing year will make it easier still. Four nights without the kids. It is terribly indulgent to fly overseas for four bloody nights but hey. Sean had a conference to attend, I merely http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/07/a-paris-minibreak.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-3678458775624636945Fri, 29 May 2015 11:28:00 +00002015-05-29T13:28:41.702+02:00 What a busy game-changing year it has been so far. For me, the changes have all been for the better. Richie is re-finding his shiny happy side, which was buried last year. Richie participates in soccer and boxing and music and his only concern at school is that there might be an extramural that he HASN'T signed up for. I am so happy I can't really overstate that. Felix is suddenly a whole new http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/05/happy-days.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-6004600415954243930Thu, 19 Mar 2015 14:20:00 +00002015-03-19T16:20:57.716+02:00 Maureen's remains were placed into the wall of remembrance at her church, St Patrick's La Rochelle, six months almost to the day after she died. We still miss her very much. The children speak about her often, and seem to find comfort in the idea that she is safe with Jesus, Prize if you can spot the humour in this plaque.   http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/03/maureen.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-1045927704519134401Thu, 19 Mar 2015 14:18:00 +00002015-03-19T16:19:02.477+02:00 When people talk about Big Pharma I like to eye roll and    because really. Clearly medicine has been corporatised, I am not naïve. There is a reason I have to play this song when I'm on hold to Discovery (it makes me feel much better). There is a reason your vasectomy costs you R30 000 and my husband makes R1 200 off it, while he's the one wielding the scalpel (and you're not even http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/03/when-people-talk-about-big-pharma-i.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2714247219771239734Thu, 26 Feb 2015 11:25:00 +00002015-02-26T13:25:00.186+02:00   True story.       http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/02/how-we-feel-when-we-go-to-kiddies.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-8171281941394465562Tue, 24 Feb 2015 11:17:00 +00002015-02-25T12:01:54.031+02:00 At a gathering of a number of mothers of children with "special needs" (four years in and I still have to suck down the gag reflex when I hear that term), I told the women how Felix has been referred for an "assessment" for a variety of weighty issues, such as how well he can understand instructions and how correctly he grips his pencil. We cackled that witches' cackle that comes from some http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/02/felix-goes-for-assessment.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-4908534417833895340Sun, 15 Feb 2015 12:53:00 +00002015-02-15T14:53:50.271+02:00 They say adversity makes for good fiction, and that may be true, but it makes for hella boring non-fiction, and that’s just for me, the writer. It is only now that the clouds have broken that I can look back on 2014 with any kind of objectivity. It was Richie’s most terrible year yet. I remember back to April, when we went on holiday in Cape Town with the boys. It was a terrible holiday! Wehttp://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2015/02/a-summary.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2744984295596513744Fri, 26 Dec 2014 19:42:00 +00002014-12-26T21:42:19.199+02:00 I took Felix and Richie to the Pantomime this December. Felix used to be terrified of this sort of stuff, but Teacher Heidrun fixed that little problem this year, with minimal fuss, and halfway through his Grade R year Felix accompanied the rest of his class to the theatre quite happily, and in fact told us all about how much fun it was afterwards. Richie wasn't so sure about the Panto show but http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/12/a-stickler-for-facts.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-8467178245926278540Mon, 01 Dec 2014 10:45:00 +00002014-12-01T12:47:41.910+02:00 It's not really the anal stages as described by Freud or Erikson - those are earlier - it's more that phase a newly six-year-old boy is in when he delights in puns, the more focused on elimination of body waste the better. Favourite insults we hurl at each other these days include "Poopoobrain" and "Fartpants" and Richie particularly loves counting in grossness: "One, poo, wee, four, vomit, http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/12/the-whole-glory-of-anal-phase.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2772408246865842638Mon, 24 Nov 2014 13:30:00 +00002014-11-25T12:07:39.292+02:00 I am used to having similar instincts to Sean when we are analysing social situations (= bitching about other people), or discussing any of the Important Subjects, or even home decorating (there was that time he asked me to choose floor tiles by myself because we always choose the same anyway and he wasn't able to get off work). So it is always odd to have such vastly differing reactions when http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/11/our-first-trip-to-casualty.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-7618634568468458983Mon, 10 Nov 2014 09:52:00 +00002014-11-10T12:02:24.584+02:00 My dearest Felix, what a big boy you suddenly are. It's hard to believe you were once so terribly shy you hated having people in your house and threw a tantrum if we had to go in the car to a children's party. This weekend past you allowed an actual birthday party(ette) to be held in your honour, and your home (although nobody was allowed into your bedroom-sanctuary). Four friends, you http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/11/felix-turned-6.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-1101423295136693802Wed, 15 Oct 2014 13:42:00 +00002014-10-16T11:02:31.337+02:00 For a kid with fucked up feet Richie's shoe collection does seem disproportionately extensive - and expensive. The shoe saga in its entirely is boring but the executive summary is that he keeps busting his brand new orthopaedic shoes because he is so rough with them. He also splays his feet outwards in order to increase base stability, and the strain on every join and lace of his shoes is a http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/10/this-and-that.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-7831944221563492373Wed, 27 Aug 2014 12:54:00 +00002014-08-27T14:54:32.664+02:00 Some people get a monster-in-law for a mother-in-law. I got lucky. I got Maureen. I got a marvel-in law. Maureen passed away a week ago, and it is incredibly difficult to write properly about her - it's always more difficult to write when the stakes are high. Maureen was diagnosed with motor neuron disease last Wednesday, just as everybody famous was getting ice poured over them, and I http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/in-memoriam.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2333934076666795240Thu, 21 Aug 2014 19:19:00 +00002014-08-21T21:19:58.633+02:00 Are holidays a magical time where Things you have been waiting for to happen suddenly happen? I think so. Felix has just wiped his own ass, of his own volition. I've been hakking at him for a while now to do it, all his friends seem to do it, and what I always forget is that Felix is 6 months younger than his friends and therefore, I just need to wait a little bit and he will get there. Richie http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/holiday-achievement-levels-unlocked.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-3633463290729621695Tue, 05 Aug 2014 09:10:00 +00002014-08-05T11:15:38.404+02:00 … that I have been a loyal gym-goer for about twelve years now, on and off, and I bloody love it. But in all this time I have either been intimidated by the thought of being the fattest one there or the uncoolest one or the most inappropriately dressed one, and my subsequent knee-jerk rebelliousness had meant that I refused to buy "gym gear". No, a T-shirt and shorts did me fine all these years.http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/can-i-just-say.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-545340291559458192Sun, 03 Aug 2014 10:55:00 +00002014-08-03T12:55:02.756+02:00 I got a phone call from Richie's school Friday morning. It goes like this: "Hi Margot, it's the school, it's not an emergency..." Blood pressure, which had spiked, returns to normal "But..." Blood pressure returns to abnormal level "Richie seems to have hurt his foot and there's a fair bit of blood, can I take his splints off?" Yikes. Apparently the kids were playing outside, then it was http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/diamonds-on-soles-of-his-shoes.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-196762736005147851Thu, 31 Jul 2014 12:01:00 +00002014-07-31T14:01:43.053+02:00 First we just had a bit of fun, dicking around with a length of floss and a knot. We both chickened out at the first sign of blood. Sean, the brave surgeon,  refused even to participate in this part. It's like pulling teeth. A few days later, Felix rushes up to me. "Mom! Why is my tooth sticking out like this?" he asks, referring to his top incisor. He prods at it to stick it back, et http://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/07/tooth-fairy.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-5177488022761184604Fri, 25 Jul 2014 09:17:00 +00002014-07-25T11:17:38.413+02:00 I am writing an article on iPad and screen entertainment use for my favourite, most faithful and most regular employer/client: Your Baby and Your Pregnancy magazines. (It is by the way very very lovely indeed to have such a client; a dream client. I love my work there and I love what I get to write for them. At R30 or so every two months it's a good buy. Feel free to buy it regularly so that thehttp://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/07/teenage-mutiny.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6251698334067836806.post-2227793583913558454Fri, 18 Jul 2014 09:07:00 +00002014-07-18T11:07:02.731+02:00 I should probably say if you are feeling depressed look away now. Does anyone else get older and feel - hell, what the fuck is all of this FOR? Why do we work so very hard? Should we really pour our energies into some kind of humanity project; is there any point to it or are we farting against thunder? We humans are a deeply disappointing lot. With massive amounts of potential, we still live inhttp://joumaseblerrieblog.blogspot.com/2014/07/fuck-everything.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Margot)2