You see, I couldn’t hear inside my own head what it was like and I needed to get out of my own way. thanks to her I took my singing several levels up in that one day. I needed to stop doing what I thought was nice and take the risk, change things up and do something that felt uncomfortable.

My art is like that now.

I’ve been working one on one with some of my teachers, I’ve had crits with the whole class and I have the feeling of impending change. like my work is on the verge of something new, something different. I have to move outside of what is comfortable and embrace difference. I need to get out of my own way. I have been working in a vacuum and now I am truly opening up to all the possibilities rather than chasing my own tail. I love it.

I am examining the work of 3D fine artists and also looking at artists who explore dichotomies and the line between kitsch and fine art and low brow and fine art. I am so excited to explore new ideas, to bring stuff I have wanted to express but have been afraid to, or worried about. To really go nuts and create what is in my heart to create. 

Now I need to go work out what that is! 

The view from one of my studio window panes

Did you ever have that nightmare where you haven’t studied and you have a surprise test or a presentation?

That happened to me for reals.

I missed the first two classes due to my enrollment kerfuffle. I missed finding out that I would be presenting a proposal in the second week. I was the third called up. The professor made me do it anyway, making it up on the spot.

I was mortified.

But I did ok. Then, finding out what the assignment actually was I asked to repeat it. I think I gained points for that. The second time went better. This is one of the most important classes about managing our careers as artists and I want to get the most out of it. I didn’t want to skate by, I needed a real critique of my proposal so that I could grow and learn. I really want to do well in this degree. I’m already growing into my role.

I’ve been feeling a little bit disconnected at university the first couple of weeks. It has been strange settling in without orientation and I have felt excited but a little dreamlike about it all. Like it wasn’t real.

That all faded as I got settled into my studio and routine. I know my professors now and smile and chat with them. They can’t believe how I came to study here! Every day I am so excited to start in, even when it involves early mornings. I am already learning so much! I did library inductions and learned about all of the exciting research resources at my fingertips and made the librarians laugh with my sheer excitement. Everyone in the course is lovely.

I have my first hour long critique coming up next week, I’m alternating between being nervous and being really excited to hear what everyone sees in my work. I have several presentations and two essays coming up. nothing major, nothing over 4000 words!

I have paid my first fees installment, I have another coming up soon! If you would like to help I am still accepting donations at my gofundme – http://www.gofund.me/2BaMaster -I also have more works available on eBay.

I want to thank all the incredible people who have helped me get to this point. I love you all! I am so happy to be studying this year, it is a wonderful challenge that will bring my art to the next level!

help me pay for university!
http://www.gofund.me/2baMaster

So I made a decision.

it was a difficult decision, I hated doing it, but as the Pozible campaign didn’t go through I decided to defer my studies until next year. I came to terms with it and did it. I watched O Week go by with sadness and started to look forward to the next year with no stress, no fundraising dramas, no worrying.

Until I found out that I wasn’t able to defer. I had to either withdraw and reapply or get my butt to class.

There was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth! oh the profanity!

I know the chances of being offered this course again, without a bachelors degree, coupled with the wonderful start to this year that I have shown already, would be slim to none. if that.

So there is nothing for it but to keep going once more!

I have learned from my previous mistakes, Pozible was good – but I think gofundme is better for this purpose.

I have set up a new campaign, there are new reward tiers and new options. You can contribute as much or as little as you want and be assured that I will get it! with Pozible I wouldn’t receive anything unless I reached my goal, with GoFundMe I receive all of the funds. in retrospect it would have been the better option to start with.

I am offering more artworks on eBay and offering great deals on other pieces. if there is a painting you have had your eye on let me know!

On the plus side, I made it to my first class and it was fantastic, this is going to be hard, but I am already learning so much! My first presentation is in a month and I have a 4000 word essay due in June. I get my own campus studio and the cafe is slouchy and comfortable. Did I mention that there were computer labs and a 3D printer? I must use it… I am truly looking forward to enjoying university, I hope I can raise the funds to continue enjoying it!

as always, your shares are appreciated. thank you for your contributions and help!

Thankyou everyone for voting on my fundraising! Per your votes I have started a crowdfunding campaign on Pozible and a series of eBay auctions at never before seen prices! Here is the link to the Pozible campaign: http://pozi.be/2bamaster I have included such rewards as custom sketches, artwork vouchers, discounts and tutorials. If there is a reward you think I should be offering let me know! This is my first ever crowdfunding campaign and I’m thrilled to be almost 1/4 there already! If getting crazy deals on artwork is more your thing, here is the eBay link too! I will be adding more works so keep checking this link! eBay auctions If there is something you have had your eye on for a while let me know, make an offer, you never know! I love you all. If you can’t contribute I understand, but would really appreciate a signal boost! Retweets and shares are all appreciated.

Update part the second: here is the eBay link too! I will be adding more works so keep checking this link! eBay auctions
If there is something you have had your eye on for a while let me know.

I have been admitted to a masters degree! It’s at the best arts school in the country and I am super excited. But there is a snag. I’m not eligible for student loans through the government at this time. I’m working on fixing my eligibility, but it won’t be fixed before the start of term. I don’t want to have to defer my dreams for a whole year! So I am in the position of trying to raise enough money to attend my first semester (with the hope that everything will be fixed after that). This is where you come in. I really need your help! But I want to involve you too. I have two ideas. One is crowdfunding, where I offer you small sketches, bookmarks, artwork and the opportunity to pick my next hair color. I may offer tutorials or a chance to get an art book of my works and research. The other is to auction some of my paintings on eBay. The works would be a mix of older and newer, big and small, some may have been damaged and repaired. What would you prefer? Crowdfunding or eBay? Both? Something else?

every day we are inundated with images of airbrushed perfection, of promises made that the billboards and magazines just can’t keep.

where are the real bodies? do we even know what they look like anymore? do we know, beyond our own doubts and the changes we yearn to make, what real even looks like?

Dallas Frasca has created a song and a clip that reflects our doubts and insecurities and shows us that we aren’t alone in our self doubt. It is a beautiful celebration of diversity where the people featured break out of their shells, their self hate, and their clothing.

This clip has been given a restricted rating on youtube and people have complained about it’s nudity. But why is this clip being so lambasted? Blurred lines, Redfoo’s idiotic display, these clips have sexualized nudity and are sexist, informing rape culture and gender bias; they have not been restricted. But a clip that shows men and women of different ages, sizes and abilities all getting nude and dancing happily? can’t let children see something like that!

I was at a water park last year with my family. I felt a little self conscious at first in my bikini, but then I looked around. At a sea of people, all different, all having fun, all beautiful. And I realized how long it had been since I had seen so many normal people in bathing suits. Since I had seen normal bodies doing normal things.
And I stopped being so self conscious, I let go and had fun with my family and didn’t care who saw me and what they thought. It was so freeing. This video reminds me of that.

I suspect that the people doing the complaining about this video are incapable of accepting non-airbrushed, normal, happy people. They are uncomfortable, basically, with jiggly bits, with uncensored truth that this is what people, real people, look like.

And they are beautiful.

The ultimate form of censorship has to be death. When artists aren’t safe to express themselves, when they can’t be free to create to attempt to enact change and cause discussion and thought for fear of death, what then?

Artists must be free. Art is one of the purest and most visceral ways to communicate concepts and ideas that need to be shared, understood, grown. Comics are one of the most subversive ways to make quick, biting and often painfully true commentary.

I salute the brave artists and other victims at Charlie Hebdo. It’s a scary time to speak up for what you believe in. It’s a scary time to strike out against those who rule with fear. It’s a scary time – which means it’s an even more important time than ever.

In the interest of sharing their voice, here are some of the comics that the victims at Charlie Hebdo were killed for.

Stand strong. Create. Be free.

I am determined to get through all the ups and downs.
I am determined to not let things beat me up or get me down.
I am determined to not take life lying down.
I am determined to do more to further my career.
I am determined that any setbacks will not beat me.
I am determined to care for myself and do wonderful things with my family.
I set forth in all of my endeavors with strength, courage and determination.

Determination shall be the word and the word shall be determination.

My word for 2014 was Assertive and it was a brilliant word for me. So good, I’m considering letting it carry over! I found my voice, I spoke out against the things that infuriated me and grew stronger in my sense of self. I embraced my hidden SJW and no longer apologized for my feminist and intersectional beliefs. I stopped apologizing for existing or taking up space and started to take care of myself. I marketed my work more aggressively and did very well. I started to conquer my fear of cameras and started being less wary about speaking to people, asking for help or admitting that I have mental health problems. I started to let the inner me out more and people didn’t run away screaming! I am getting to a place where I like myself much more.

I re-embraced my sexuality and gender. I didn’t realize being queer and having a child would confuse me quite so much and it took a while to work it all out. But I am much more confident and comfortable in my bisexuality and gender fluidity than ever.

2014 was the year that almost every appliance we owned packed it in. The hand beaters, hair dryer, oven, microwave, the washer/dryer (twice- three times if you consider that the new one is being repaired already – thank goodness for warranties!)

We lost our cat, the very first pet we got together. Saotome was a part of our lives for so long and we miss him dearly. He was a great cat, smart, capable and very loving. Also a terrifying hunter. Our other cat, Kodachi, was bereft without him. We were going to wait but a new cat popped his cute little face into our lives and we couldn’t say no to Kenpachi. So a bittersweet side to the year with loss and new love found. There is no replacement for a family member, but we love our kitten very much.

Yes we name our cats after anime characters.

I went on holiday with my loved ones to Queensland and had loads of fun at theme parks for a week. I had two nights away at hotels with my husband. I went to the zoo and the museum and theme parks and went on rides and had fun. We did science as a family. Miss graduated from kindergarten and can’t wait to start school. She still wants to be an astronaut.

I worked hard on improving my mobility. Despite sickness and pain and exhaustion I tried to not let it impact my work or fun and did things because I wanted to. Even if it was hard it was worth it! I climbed more stairs this year than in the past ten! I’m finally managing stairs.

I had another solo exhibition! I created the best art of my life this year and was proud of the work I put in. I managed the entire exhibition better with more time to paint, better research, I was more relaxed and embraced the marketing better. I have suffered less afterwards and learned more valuable things about exhibiting, marketing and the value of galleries that bring people in. I painted live in the gallery and enjoyed talking with people and singing when no one was around. The acoustics were divine! I donated a piece to the Greens in Prahan and created some fun steampunk pieces.

I swallowed my fears and doubts and applied to study at a university I’ve always wanted to study at. And I got in! Next year I will be doing a Graduate Certificate of Visual Art at the Victorian College of the Arts.

I won a competition to go to Philadelphia and go to NASTAR and train like an astronaut for a day in simulators. I am beyond thrilled that I get to go to the states and do such a once in a lifetime experience.

After mine was stolen 15 years ago, I have a flute again! I still remember how to play and I’m really enjoying the silly little things like playing scales and old performance pieces. I lost my singing voice for months this year and it really helped to embrace a new (old?) instrument. It was a gift from a friend of a friend and such an unexpected and delightful gesture.

So that was my year! It was pretty good all up and I am excited for 2015. I’d love to hear from you- Share your year with me or your hopes for 2015!

It’s not all white robes and snowy feathers people!

This series is about breaking down barriers between religions, about showing we have more in common than we think and showing how all religions share common threads that tie us together.

Join me at the glorious Mission to Seafarers’ Dome Gallery to see the second installment take flight.

Exhibition dates 13-27 November 2014
Mission to Seafarers Dome Gallery
717 Flinders st.
Melbourne 3000