Jeff Putz

Building computer lust

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 02:53:22 GMT

Since I'm solo tonight, and Simon is bed, I thought I'd camp out in front of my desktop computer and work on my next big project. I haven't worked at my home desk (as opposed to my day work desk) in awhile. Unfortunately, what I found was kind of a mess. Lovely as the screen and CPU might be on the giant 27" iMac, it does have a conventional, mechanical hard drive, which is super slow compared to the solid state drive in my laptop. This matters when your project involves about four gigs of data that you're importing and transforming. Plus, the VM I'm working on has about 10 gigs of dumps and temp files that need cleaned up, so basically I'm not yet getting anywhere.

Today, another rumor surfaced about the potential for new 15", and maybe even 17" MacBooks in the Air style... meaning very light, very thin, and of course containing solid state drives. The even more interesting part of the rumor is that they're going to include really high resolution screens. Think what that did for the iPhone, now scale it up to a laptop screen. Certainly the operating system can handle it. That would be amazing.

Right now, I still have pretty awesome computers. The iMac is just over two years old, and hard drive aside, is still a fantastic computer. My 17" laptop is almost three years old, a life expectancy you never had for laptops back in the day because they were always so underpowered. Since putting the SSD in it almost a year ago, it has been like new. Aside from a few minor cosmetic scratches, it's still in great condition.

If the rumors are true, and I can't talk myself out of it, I may consider the new lighter laptop. As much as I love mine, and as much as I've traveled with it, it's just so damn heavy. So if it happens, I'll take the SSD out of the old laptop and put it in the iMac, and see if I can sell the old laptop for a grand or so. It really seems to be worth that, still. As I learned with the Mac Pro I sold two years ago, these Macs have strangely high resale value.

I'm getting cheap in some aspects of my adulthood, but being cheap about your computers, when they're the primary tool of your trade, just doesn't make sense. It's like being a mechanic and buying your tools at Walmart. I dunno. We'll see how I feel if the rumors become reality.

The parent you don't want to be

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 01:39:39 GMT

Simon and I had a boys' night out today, while Diana is off in Pittsburgh for a well-deserved "fiber arts" conference (read: gathering of knitting nerds). Since we needed a few things from the grocery store, I figured we'd grab a bite at our favorite restaurant as well.

This was the start of a wave of exposure to the kind of parent I never want to be. First set: An extraordinarily attractive couple in business attire at one table, with the father dicking around on his phone and the mother doing some kind of paperwork. The two kids are literally begging for attention. When one gets up to watch the caged lizard move to his bowl, the father looks up and starts yelling at the kid for sitting on the floor. Because, you know, kids never should do that. These are the kind of people who are douchey in a business setting, but they were extra-douchey as parents.

As we're pulling out of the parking lot, another mother allows her 3 and 5-year-olds to linger behind unsupervised in a busy lot. Who does that? People suck at driving, especially in parking lots.

Then there's this asshole hilljack who finds out his daughter posted dramatic dislike for her parents on Facebook, and then shoots up the kid's laptop and posts the video on Youtube. Really? Wow, I can't imagine how that kid could possibly be so dramatic. Where would they learn such behavior?

I don't expect to be my kid's best friend and buddy, without discipline. But I'm trying really hard not to screw him up by understanding that he learns negative behavior from us before anyone else. You know the passive aggressive stuff people do with their tone, or by forcefully shutting a door? I've caught myself doing that in response to some of Simon's more difficult behavior, and I have to stop myself and ask what the hell I'm doing. If he is disrespectful or a douchebag, it's because he learned it by watching me.

This is a particularly sensitive topic at the moment, because Simon is exhibiting all kinds of negative behavior right now, as is typical for his age. It's extremely difficult sometimes to be the grown up and remove myself emotionally from his boundary testing. Fortunately, seeing examples of what not to be helps me keep focus. I'll never have all of the answers, but there's no shortage of data showing what not to do.

The gay bashing and marriage nonsense has to stop

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 17:39:59 GMT

Hearing the court overturn Prop 8 in California, calling it unconstitutional, was a breathe of fresh air. It's certainly one of many court battles that will take place, but it's a step in the right direction.

After a number of other public incidents, including Ellen's battle with stupidity and some very good points made by Howard Stern of all people, it occurs to me that there is a very loud minority of people making noise that are completely out of their minds, and would be literally banished into the most chastised underground of our culture if we were talking about race or some other group of people.

The politicians in particular have blown my mind. How can Santorum stand up in front of people and suggest that gay people should stop being gay, in 2012? Are you fucking kidding me? What's so bizarre about this is that with the progress we have made culturally, I doubt there are many people who aren't related to or have a friend who is gay, and you know it. It's like suggesting you don't know any black people or Jews. Given that fact, how can you be so blatantly stupid? How does someone like that even get to run for president?

And it's not like the people on the other side of the aisle are any better. Obama still can't grow some nuts and say, "Yeah, gay marriage is fine, we should allow that." He campaigned on ditching Don't Ask Don't Tell, but managed to drag his feet for several years before getting it done.

So what motivates people to even give a shit about this issue in the first place? If it's a religious issue, that's fine, but since there is no official religion in this country, you don't get to use that as an excuse. The other set of excuses, about "defending" marriage or whatever, is even more bullshit. You want to defend marriage? Stop letting half of all straight people get married in the first place, since it results in divorce. My first marriage didn't fail because of gay people, and it's not going to have any impact on my second marriage.

I loved the kid who stood up in front of the Iowa legislature, raised by lesbians, and told them in the most eloquent and non-confrontational way that the gender of his parents had nothing to do with who he was. I admire people like that, because I get too angry at stupid people.

It sucks that we even spend time talking about stuff like this. On the grand scale of problems we have, this isn't even on the scale.

My pipes of Internets are full

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 03:52:54 GMT

I know I've mentioned before about how I tend to hold more things close to the vest lately. So I'm not going to say what I've been working on lately in my spare time, but I will say that I've reached a pretty high level of motivation. Tonight is the first evening in awhile that I've just backed off and left the computer off.

I've learned that I have to take advantage of these sprints (not to be confused with "Agile" sprints) as best I can, because they don't last. I mean, there's a reason that the current version of CoasterBuzz, not counting the many new features added since, is about 3.5 years old. There is actually quite a bit of inspired work going on lately, with sketches, prototypes, experiments and general geeky hacks.

Part of it is also the desire to stay sharp. My current gig doesn't have much opportunity for writing code, so I need to spend time outside of work doing the things that I think make me well-rounded and someone that people will listen to. Plus, there is so much in the way of new stuff to explore lately. Things I couldn't conceive four years ago are so much easier now. I feel less constrained.

Tennis: Week 3

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 03:24:49 GMT

Things keep getting better, like on Queer Eye. I got there earlier this time and did some extra stretching, and my shit doesn't hurt like it did the last two weeks. My left heel hurts a little, though that's something that has bothered me since college on and off. Coach ran us around a bit this time, which I absolutely love because it feels good, despite it reminding me out of shape I am.

I still have a healthy dose of feeling like I suck, but I also feel like some things are coming together. I'm starting to understand my own body motion at a technical level, which is the same thing that has served me so well in volleyball. I can see that my swing is technically fine if I just toss a ball out in front of me, but I'm not moving my feet to where I need to be when the ball is on the go. It's very different to not meet a ball in front of you, and to think about where it's going on the bounce. I have to make an extra effort to think about it.

We did some overhead swinging today, which as you might expect comes very natural. My God does that feel good. Being able to blast the shit out of the ball is very satisfying. Unfortunately, we didn't spend a lot of time serving again, and I really need to work on that.

The one point of frustration that I have is that I have the necessary agility. I'm out of shape, so it's in finite supply, but I feel it. The problem is that I'm not disciplined enough to apply it correctly yet to the game. It goes back to meeting the ball in the right way. You can't fake it and make little adjustments like you can in volleyball, because you need to make the swing of a racket part of the process to contact the ball.

Overall though, I felt empowered, like I'm heading in the right direction. It was weird to think about how, growing up, my only real athleticism came from riding a bike, which is little more than endurance when you're not doing it competitively. Volleyball started to click when I was in college, but it wasn't until I started coaching it that I really started to understand how to improve myself. The game is different here, but the skills for learning are surprisingly transferrable. I also love the feeling that comes with physical activity that doesn't feel like exercise.

The only issue long term is that this particular sport can get expensive. Court time ain't cheap, and yet I'd like to reach some point where I was consistently playing twice a week. If I can't do that, maybe I need to look harder into playing VB once a week, and get back to coaching next year.

Facebook, the business and the money

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 15:50:52 GMT

The forthcoming Facebook IPO is a big deal in the news, and for good reason. It's going to make a lot of people very rich. This is really the first big technology IPO in a long time, and it's impossible not to compare it to the many companies that came and went in the dotcom boom more than a decade ago. The one I think of the most is that of Google.

Mark Zuckerberg does not appear to be in this for the money. He's had countless chances to be a billionaire, and passed on all of them. There is some indication that Facebook itself doesn't really need the money. However, there are enough investors and vested employees that want something back, that it is time for them to get what they're due.

The net result of this IPO is that a lot of good people will leave the company. They won't share Zuckerberg's ideals about making something great. They'll be kicking it on a beach somewhere sipping girly drinks with umbrellas. I don't fault them for that. However, it will change the very fabric of the company, maybe not for the better.

Facebook's strength is that they're able to move relatively quickly and continuously innovate. The site had changed dramatically over the five plus years it has been generally available to the public outside of schools and businesses. It's like having a child, in some ways, because you see them every day and you don't realize how much they change. They're able to evolve like that because of the "hacker" culture so ingrained in the company. It leads to quality problems a lot of the time (as I'm very fond of bitching about), but for the most part, they move fast.

This is the opposite of most companies as they get bigger. Combine getting bigger with the likely turnover that will come, and it's hard to tell if they can keep up the pace they've had. Zuckerberg said in the filing that he's committed to challenging the way that business goes, and he has a majority of voting shares to make that happen, but how will it go in practice?

There is a natural curve that companies appear to follow. Microsoft certainly got big and stupid, and this became particularly obvious when Windows Vista shipped. What a train wreck that was. Google seems like it's getting big and stupid, with stories of management waste and people leaving. Yahoo is probably the worst of the bunch.

But it doesn't have to be that way. Amazon keeps getting bigger, and they somehow manage to get better at what they do. (Actually, I can give you a lot of reasons about why I think that's the case, but that's another post.) Even Microsoft seems to be swinging back the other way, in certain parts of the company, getting lean and fast in places.

I hope for the best for Facebook and its future. The thing that most excites me about business is less about the product, and more about the processes that run the business. This is especially true for things in the realm of software development.

Proactive vs. passive life

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 18:59:35 GMT

I was thinking the other day about how my approach to life has changed lately, specifically in the last year. I feel like I'm far more proactive about how I go about stuff, and that there might be a natural curve in how these things play out.

I suppose one could argue that I've had my successes and failures over the years, but in some ways I feel like I've been along for the ride, sitting on a boat and letting the current take me where it goes. Socially, this is entirely how I approached life, which explains why I dated so little in my college days. I wasn't deliberately trying. Professionally, I've done much of the same thing. I remember spending a year and a half in a job where I wasn't learning anything, wasn't doing anything I liked and just showed up.

Then 2007 happened. By that time, I was socially as proactive as I could be, eventually meeting a woman that I'd marry. In 2009, I sort of got a professional kick in the nuts, realizing that I could move for greener pastures. In 2011 I had all kinds of financial epiphanies about what wealth really is and how borrowing can be bad, and that led to another move and a massive shift in goal setting.

Admittedly, the professional part doesn't have the clarity in direction that other parts of my life have, but in a bigger sense, I feel like I'm not just going along with life. It feels like I'm giving it direction. In a lot of ways, I'm following an inverse curve that a lot of my friends have. Some folks graduate from high school with a grand plan that involves college, marriage, a house, 2.2 kids and a corner office. They all find out that those plans never work out as they expected, and they're often miserable until they embrace some of the chaos and unpredictability that goes with real life. With all of that advice giving to younger friends, it turns out that my way of drifting quasi-aimlessly wan't much better.

When you compare the proactive and passive life, it turns out that something in the middle is the best way to go. If you yearn for total control and adherence to the plan, you will absolutely be disappointed with the outcome. If you sit back and let life happen to you, you will absolutely be disappointed with the outcome. It seems then that embracing a little of both is the way to go.

How's that working out for me? I think it's a net win. I miss Seattle like crazy, but the proactive decision to deal with the chaos of not being able to sell my house has put us in a much better place financially. I took action on something that happened to me. I'm being an active participant without overlooking the daily moments, and I think I'm happier for it. There is still a lot to figure out, and I'll never have all of the answers, but I get a lot of peace from knowing I'm doing what I can.

Personality comes with tantrums

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 05:24:48 GMT

I've been really excited lately to see all kinds of new personality traits appear in Simon. He's finally starting to use words in a meaningful way, even if he doesn't get them entirely right. I mean, he says, "nigh nigh" when he goes to bed. Sometimes if you prompt him to say something, he'll blurt out something close. Thank God, because we'd love to say he says something useful before he's 2 next month.

With all of this emerging personality comes a lot of crying. Not actual tears, most of the time, but a super annoying whine. He mostly does it when he isn't getting what he wants, gets frustrated or can't communicate some burning desire. Diana and I both let it get to us to some degree, and it's hard to dial back and acknowledge that this is just part of normal development.

Simon also spends a lot of time testing boundaries, including a lot of arm swinging and hitting. That's even harder to process, because sometimes he does something that actually hurts. Most frustrating is bed time for the last week or so. He pulls out all of the stall tactics, and he seems to have lost interest in rocking in our lap for a few minutes before we put him down. That sucks for us, because getting a quiet moment at the end of the day to talk to him is something we both enjoy.

Fortunately, it's not all negative. Far from it! One of the most adorable things he does now is give you a kiss. He doesn't really pucker, he just kind of plants his face on you. When he's excited, he does it with his mouth open, which is like getting slimed. He also just pulls out a kiss at random at times. This evening, while watching Sesame Street in his pre-bed wind-down, he violently jumped up and climbed up on me to smooch. No idea why he did it, but it was super cute.

He has also taken up running laps around the living room, which is pretty hilarious. He'll go around a dozen times, giggling and having a great time. Tonight he outdid himself. He did one lap around, stopped, farted, and went around again. That's my boy.

Simon is also a helper. This is also something that requires patience on our part, because he often just gets in the way. But he likes to sweep in the kitchen, help with dishes, go get the mail and empty Diana's sink cupboard of every possible hair product for her to use.

He's really a lot of fun, and I need to be more proactive in recording his antics with video. Time flies.

Higher design aspirations

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 01:33:08 GMT

I was reading an article from October (I'm a little behind in my dead tree consumption) in Fast Company about design, and how the United States has kind of sucked at it in many ways for a long time. The article points out a lot of winners here that are getting it right, including the usual suspects like Apple, Nike, Herman Miller, Viking and such. What really stuck with me, though, was the opening statement about America, home to strip malls and McMansions, and furniture showrooms with a "dispiriting array of bloated pleather sofas." Having recently purchased a lot of furniture, I can identify with that.

My first real furniture, the leather set of stuff that Stephanie and I bought circa 1999, was awesome. It had well defined lines, yet it had that lost-in-a-pillow-like comfort that reminded you that you were sitting on great furniture. It was also the only set in the store at the time that didn't look like a big blob of cow flesh stuffed with squishy stuff. I always think back to that shopping trip, about why so much of what you buy looks so uninspired.

Design isn't just about looking good. It also means something functions well. Back in the days of perpetual computer upgrades, where you would open up the case and swap out parts on a regular basis, it was important that the innards of the machine were well designed. You wanted thumb screws and cables that were the right length. The parts that you normally would never see has to be functional even in those rare times that you had tough them. The case has to be designed right.

As you can imagine, being a software developer, design is super important to me. Most people think about the user interface, but that's only a fraction of the design. The code has to be loosely coupled, maintainable, testable and easy to read. In today's world, it will also interact with other stuff on wires, so the architecture has to be solid in design as well.

Even processes have to be designed. If they're inefficient or things get in the way of the results they were intended to produce, they need to be redesigned. You've encountered all kinds of poorly designed processes, frequently in government or big, stupid companies.

That's why design, in the broad sense of the word, excites me. It matters. It fits in the same category as things like craftsmanship and pride in your work. It matters, because the end result of what you do is better. It's what makes you stand out.

The BMV was not terrible

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 17:18:47 GMT

For all of the things that annoy me about Ohio, I was rather surprised at how relatively painless it was to get a new drivers license and plates for my car. This is generally the part of state government most of us loathe the most, and for good reason.

Washington was clever because they had clear documentation online about what you needed, and fed wait times for the licensing offices to the site as well. During my first week out there, I checked it early one morning from work and bolted out there for a 15 minute wait. The problem there is that the process is so inefficient. You bounce around to three people, and you then you leave with a temporary license because they mail the real one. License plates, registration and title are handled in completely different locations. Pain in the ass.

Ohio works electronically as much as possible now. It had been years since I walked into an office for plates, because you can handle most of it online, save for new cars our out-of-state transfers. In my county, they can do titles, licenses, plates and exams all in the same place. I had to do the written exam again (which is kinda stupid, as if Washington, and Ohio previously can't vouch for me), and it creeped me out that the computer-based test had my last license photo from 2006 or something.

None of the people were bastards, either. I actually give them a little credit, because I'm sure many people they deal with are miserable jerks to them.

Now I just look forward to them dropping the shitty plate design for the more simple, neutral version coming in December. They'll also ditch the pink drivers licenses (still can't believe that), and the new ones will match the plates in design. Although, with plates that start with "FKD," it's almost like a free vanity plate.

Tennis: Week 2

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 03:43:05 GMT

Half of the group didn't show up for the group tennis lesson tonight, so that meant there were only three of us, plus the instructor and his teenage sidekick high school sensation. That's good news for me, because as I said last week, more feedback helps me a lot, as does repetition. I got a lot of both.

This time, I didn't feel like I sucked. I could feel improvement. The swing is getting more natural, and I'm sending fewer balls into the balcony. Once again, my biggest challenge is to unlearn a lot of what I know from volleyball in terms of hitting mechanics and position relative to the ball. For example, I need to learn where my body has to be relative to the ball, so I can make an optimal swing at it. Lateral movement is fine, but moving forward and backward is hard for me. I'm sure I'll figure it out eventually, because like volleyball, you want to be in the right place ahead of time, to make the best contact you can.

Serving is a completely new motion for me, and it will take awhile to get that figured out. Poor tossing is already my biggest problem.

We did a little bit of basic king-of-the-court, and it was exactly what I needed to feel like I was getting somewhere. When I have to move to the ball, with something at stake, I don't overthink hitting the ball. Mixing it up with short stuff here and there helps too. The instructor said he was impressed with my speed, though my body is pissed at me now for it. In the prime of my coaching days, speed was often all I had against six-foot teenage girls, but I was in a lot better shape then!

Overall, I left the court a lot happier this time. I'd really like to be competitive within a year or so, and tonight it felt like that was possible. I hope I can stick with it.

And I still need to buy a racquet.

Body calibration

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 01:46:45 GMT

One of the motivating factors to seriously consider the role of a work-from-home consultant was the idea that I could develop more of a routine around taking better care of myself. Since the move, I've kind of fallen off the horse in terms of eating and activity.

After one week, I've managed to restore some normalcy to my eating habits. I'm not eating out every day, and I'm regularly having breakfast. I'm not eating differently, really, just less. My body is getting used to the old habits and metabolism. Already dropped two pounds, which is never hard at first.

The physical activity starts with tennis, but playing once a week isn't going to be enough. I'm looking into playing volleyball, but I'm picky about that. I'm also thinking about getting a mag trainer to put the bike on, if I can stand being stationary like that.

The takeaway from all of this is that I feel physically better than I have in awhile. The IBS has gone away, I'm less tired, it's easier to focus on stuff mentally... I just feel more "calibrated."

Observations on killing yourself over work

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 22:35:43 GMT

One of the things that I noticed while working at Microsoft was that a great many people there tend to kill themselves for their job. It's even worse in the program manager discipline, as I found out first hand. Some of the effort I would attribute to doing the opposite of what books like Rework suggest, some of it is the bizarre cultural notion that killing yourself somehow makes you better (for your career, God, karma, or whatever).

I would generalize that most of the people I've known, some of them very close friends, who engage in this behavior, are completely miserable. Many don't even realize it. I'm not suggesting that there aren't times when you need to roll up your sleeves and get dirty. Shit happens. However, there is a harsh reality that I think often goes unnoticed. Here's the reality that I see:

It's rare that the e-mail you send at 6 p.m. on a Friday will have any greater impact than the same e-mail sent at 9 a.m. on Monday morning.
Most of the shit in your inbox doesn't matter. If it did, you would have already responded to it.
If you're really buried, you're under-staffed. If you're always buried, you're under-staffed and headed for burnout. It's not sustainable. Ask for help.
No one is really paying attention to how much time you put in, so if you think it will advance your career, you're mistaken. Focus on results. In fact, time spent has nothing to do with results.
Artifacts, and by that I mean e-mail and other documents, are not a measure of your ability to do your job. More is just more, not more better.
Lunch is for eating. Dinner is for eating, too, and by then you should be done with work.

Like anyone else, my feelings and opinions are driven largely by my experience. So let me give you some context about why I feel that work is important, but not at the expense of your life.

My first real job was running a government cable TV outfit. It was kind of a lifestyle job, with some weird hours, but I enjoyed it. It helped that they did comp time, so anything over 40 hours meant time-and-a-half off, even though I was salaried. I got a lot of satisfaction from what I achieved, but after three years, wanted more pay to match my peers at other cities. This was met with a lecture about the career choices I made (and a demeaning comment from the high school principal that indicated she thought of me as one of the kids, at age 26). So the next choice I made was to go elsewhere.

Over a period of several years, I worked for a number of start-up companies, with some consulting sprinkled in between. In other words, I worked in places that were risky in terms of longevity. I watched people spend years putting time in for a reward that would never come. Through these jobs, I learned that working for someone is actually a very straight-forward contract. While you provide value, at an agreed upon rate, you get paid. It's not more complicated than that. It's not a reason to hate The Man, it's just an understanding.

My point is that killing yourself for a job tends to throw the value proposition upside down, and not in your favor. That's hard for a lot of people to stomach when unemployment is high, but I still don't think you should sell yourself short just because you get paid. The cost to the rest of your life, to family, leisure and everything else, is too high. This is especially true in technology jobs where demand for your skills are high.

Forums now over 2,500 downloads

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 02:50:56 GMT

I noticed today that POP Forums hit its 2,500th download today, since making it an open source app on CodePlex. It took me about 10 months from the first preview version to the final, and then I went another 8 months before updating it again. Now I'm more into a rhythm of trying to update it. The ironic part is that I'm not really using it myself right now, though getting it to a particularly useful state is part of the plan for my own use, on CoasterBuzz and what not.

The exciting part for me is how interested people have become lately. When I opened it up for translation, I immediately found people to do a few more languages. It now works in English, Spanish, German and Dutch. I've also had people file a few bug reports, and I've got those fixed. I haven't truly opened up, hosting the source control up there, but that hasn't stopped people from jumping in and getting the source code at release points.

I'm really excited about the next thing, which I can't talk about yet because it aligns with Microsoft stuff that they were good enough to share with me. I will say that I hope to have the app in a feature area that most forums don't currently do.

Since I'm not writing code in a day job capacity at the moment, I've been really energized to work on this project. It won't make me any money (well, technically ad revenue on my sites once I'm using it), but it's very satisfying to work on something that a lot of people get value out of. I'm starting to come to peace with the idea that this thing has in many ways defined my developer career for more than a decade, and that's OK. And hey, I even got a free ReSharper license for maintaining an open source project!

Sleeping beauty

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 03:42:42 GMT

My distress over Simon's sleeping issues has been greatly relieved, as he has managed to be a lot better the last two nights. In fact, he has even managed to wake up happy after naps and in the morning, for the most part.

The world of sleep has been a mess for us, pretty much ever since Diana was pregnant. Growing a human in your abdomen has to be the worst thing in the world for sleep, and it's certainly not good for the mate, either. Then after the baby is born, you have all of that sleep depravation in the first few months, then a couple of years of getting up early. If that weren't bad enough, you can't sleep because you're making lists in your head about whatever you have to do, because your time priorities are different. Naps hopelessly throw you off even more. It's worse for Diana, because she was already a light sleeper, and she has to be pretty exhausted to turn her brain off. My sleep issues go in spurts, but have been more frequent since the move, due to the move, job changes, car crash and what not.

I think my sweet spot is around 7.5 hours each night, and sometimes I do hit that. Unfortunately, I've also been waking up at various points, and sometimes I can't go back under. My test for adequate sleep is that I've had a dream or two. I don't have them unless I get solid sleep. Although the quality of the dreams might also mean something. I had some in the last week that freaked me out a little.

The whole issue of quality sleep makes me feel a little neurotic. I could do without that feeling.

We could all use a little Garbage in our lives

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 01:28:57 GMT

As important as music is to me, I don't exhibit the same level of fandamonium that I did back in the day. I'm not sure why, exactly. It could be growing up, I suppose. I'm still trying a little to discover new and interesting stuff, but mostly that's via XM (which I won't hear as much now that I don't drive anywhere for work). It's not that I'm stuck on "old" music, it's just that I don't go to a dozen shows a year anymore.

But then there's Garbage. I'm not sure when I first heard them, but I think it was actually on MTV, with the video for "Queer." Intrigued by any band with a redhead female singer, I bought their first album and was instantly hooked. I've seen them five times, and of course have all of the albums and notable B-sides. It was fascinating to see them go from studio project with a very self-conscious front-woman to an amazing, ass-kicking live band. There aren't many bands that I've seen that deliver the way Garbage does.

Then a couple of years ago, Shirley Manson shows up on Terminator: Sarah Connor on TV. WTF, Shirley is a terminator? But she looked good, and turned around from her blonde and too-skinny self-loathing phase from 2003 or whatever. Got me thinking, gosh, now that we're in the age of social media, "shirley" they're all on Facebook and what not.

So Shirley started dropping hints last year about working with the band, and they started recording. Now we're just weeks away from a new album, after seven very long years of being Garbage-free. As I posed on Facebook, I'm so excited that I peed a little. I can't even tell you how excited I am.

Bedtime freak-outs

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 02:51:25 GMT

Simon has not been good for bedtime lately. Some of it is what I'd expect, that he doesn't want to go to bed because there's so much excitement he feels he might miss out on. However, it's the tantrums that happen when you actually try to put him down that are getting out of control. Most times, you can leave him in the crib, let him cry it out, and come back to find Mr. Affectionate, ready to go down.

Tonight has been awful though. For two hours he's been getting up, usually doing what I call "fake crying," not in any real negative state other than putting it on because he wants attention. But then twice he's done a scream at the top of his lungs as if he were genuinely and physically hurt. Maybe he was flailing in the crib and hurt something, but I can't tell.

Not sure what the cause is. He's been generally getting up in the morning fairly happy, and his naps have been longer than usual, so his other sleep endpoints have been pretty solid.

I hope this passes soon. As much as we try to be adults and handle it rationally, it does tend to wear on us.

Starting tennis

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 16:21:45 GMT

Now that I truly work from home, and I've eliminated even walking to and from my car, it's obvious that I need to find some physical activity. Bobbing my head to the Black Keys at my desk is not exercise. I'm going to work my network of friends to eventually look into playing in some hardcore volleyball leagues. I've also decided to learn how to play tennis.

Why tennis? Well, Diana plays it, so there's that. But it's also a physical game that one can play without a team, and I feel like I need something that is strictly about me when I'm engaged in it (unless of course I'm playing doubles). The game involves some reusable skills in terms of game theory and only a few parts of the technical physiological components as volleyball, so it seems like a natural fit. Sort of.

We joined up with the tennis club where Diana was a member before our stint in Seattle. It's a nice facility, and it's not particularly snobby or anything. If anything, plus one for hiring a girl to work the desk with visible body piercings. There's a lot of what I'd consider douchebaggery associated with the sport, like Wimbledon with their silly dress code and Serena with her, well, with herself, but it's a very physical and fun-to-watch sport.

So I signed up for some lessons, and had the first one last night. What a train wreck that was. I took a tennis gym class in college, but wow, I don't even want to say how long ago that was now because it makes me feel ancient. I did have some interesting take-aways from the first lesson.

The biggest one is that I have to let go of some of the volleyball wiring. For example, when you hit a ball in volleyball, you snap your wrist as you hit and follow through. In tennis, the racquet is more of an extension of your arm and you don't snap. Plus, in volleyball, you back off on the follow through if you want to back off on distance. If you do that in tennis, there's no top spin and you hit the ball into the balcony. My forehand challenge is to consistently swing through. When I do, it's pretty awesome, but I only do it 5% of the time.

The backhand was slightly better, once I stopped trying to do it with two hands. Inconsistency is still the biggest problem, but it feels remarkably more natural.

What I found exceptionally easy was the short game, volleying up at the net. I think anyone with volleyball experience will find this pretty easy to ramp up on quickly, because it involves the same super-quick reaction that net play on the wood floor involves. The biggest adjustment piece is having that medium between your hand and the ball.

When I got to short volleying, I realized that the hardest thing for me is the difference between rebounding and redirecting a ball, to actually striking and pushing the ball. That will take some getting used to.

Still, it felt pretty good overall. I think after the group class is done, I may look into one-on-one coaching, because I need specific technical feedback and attention to improve at the rate that I'd like. That might get expensive, but if I can raise the game to something resembling competitiveness, that would be satisfying.

I suppose I'll need to buy a racquet.

Republicans and conservatives are insane

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 04:11:00 GMT

When you hire someone in business, you generally have no problem sniffing out bullshit. First you reject the resumes that use a lot of words without saying anything, like, "Created value by exploiting synergistic opportunities." When you meet job candidates in person, you immediately pass on anyone who answers a question about one thing with tales of something else.

This is not, however, the basis for which Americans vote for elected officials. They vote for the person who can spew the most bullshit, not the least. That's what this Republican race has been. I finally watched one of the debates today, now that the numbers have been thinned a little, and I'm stunned at the amount of irrelevant nonsense.

Even more stunning, however, is the fact that Ron Paul, while not someone I could entirely back, is the closest thing to a common sense and viable candidate the Republican party has. Yet, as a percentage, only a small portion of self-labeled Republicans support him. It's completely insane. He's the only guy who sticks to policy and not opposition bashing. He actually has things to say.

The most annoying thing is that these guys are constantly getting into a pissing match about who is more conservative. Really? What does that have to do with anything? How about having the most common sense? There's an idea.

This is another example of Americans getting the government they deserve. Pay attention! Vote for the dog catcher because they can catch dogs, not because they're more conservativey or whatever.

Being who you didn't know you were

jeff@popw.com (Jeff) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 03:06:01 GMT

Amidst all of the general negativity in the world, I pride myself on trying to hold on to the idea that people are inherently good, and capable of great things. Holding this belief is a little self-serving, like a lot of religious beliefs, I suppose, because I also want to believe that I'm capable of great things I'm not yet aware of.

When I look at the lives of great people, whether it be for great achievement in some kind of global sense, or an anonymous person who is an exceptionally effective PTA member, I wonder how they got to be that way. Certainly you can choose to do great things, but does something inspire people to make things happen?

What I'm thinking about, in no specific terms, is what the impetus might be to do something great. If I look at my own life, I'm somewhat surprised to see just how many external things are the basis for achievement. Professionally, I can look back as far as radio and think about my teenage love for the work DJ's did, and how it got me into the business.

In my personal life, I'm amazed at the intensity of love I have for my wife and child. How did I become this father and husband? I might have always had the capacity for it, but it was a series of events that got me there, arguably including a divorce. Funny how that works.

I'm not sure what else I can be, but now I'm starting to look for things that might help bring out the best in me. Then I can be someone I didn't know I was.