Jamie's Rabbits

The Post About Influenza and How It Teaches

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 19:56:00 +0000

Illness had been slapping me around all weekend and I decided a doctor probably knew more than my friends - WebMD and Gregory House.

The diagnosis? Non-swine influenza.

Here's what I've learned from this bout of debilitating sickness:

1. Not breathing is annoying.The altitude difference between standing up and sitting down is the difference between breathing and not breathing. Ergo, sitting down is annoying.

2. People care more about how you sound when you're sick than how you feel. You can feel quasi-well, but if your coughs sound like a mack truck ramming through a barricade with gasoline spilling out, then your friends and coworkers are not interested in your RSVP. To anything.

3. Too much television can make you sicker. Yesterday, I watched a History Channel special on 2012 and its year of reckoning. I immediately started making my Y2K12 list. The Mayans don't play when it comes to math.

4. Flu shots are all about timing.

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.43

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 03:58:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

This is the only productive thing I've done this weekend due to debilitating sinus pressure and overwhelming fatigue and a throat that's declared MUTINY. I'm headed to the doctor in the morning where I'm anxious to hear the words "influenza" or "the plague." This is the Rabbit Recommends: INeedToWashMyHair Edition.

Read

When sick, there is only one go-to reading choice: magazines. My medicated brain can't process things like plot or character development. THE magazine fitting the bill better than any other is Entertainment Weekly. A subscription is worth the commitment if you like to read, watch, or listen - like me. Plus, there's The Bullseye, The Hit List, Stephen King, Diablo Cody (my long-lost sister) and Jeff Jensen (the Lost guru) to round out the awesomeness. Their online site will tide you over quite nicely the other 6 days of the week.

Watch

Cameron: [singing] "When Cameron was in Egypt's land... Let my Cameron go!"
I sang the harmony part of this lamentation as I rewatched one of the best movies ever made - Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I tend to love anything where an actor talks to the camera. As if they know that I know that they know I'm watching and need more details about what I just saw. John Hughes - rest in peace.

Listen

I don't tend to listen to music when I'm focused on getting both nostrils unstuffed at the same time. However, Plumb released a new album this week: Beautiful History - A Hits Collection and I found myself with every song on repeat. Her music often finds itself on soundtracks or remixed for some living room dancing. This song, Stranded, is my favorite.

The Post About Drunk Doctors and Birthing Rabbits

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 07:46:00 +0000

November 11, 12, 13.

These were the options presented to my Mom when considering my birth. Thirteen was bad luck, and she'd be busy celebrating her own birth on the 12th. Plus, 11/11 would be easy to remember into old age.

So plans were made.

But I did what I always do.

I line up the glasses. I obsess over the font. I fret over color coordination.

And I make the plans. I'm a planner.

So at 1:46am, November 5, 1975, I came into the world. Feet first.

The way a planner intends.

My brother's delivery doctor would eventually run for President of the United States. My delivery doctor was hung over from a party when he performed the C-section.

He was not a planner.

The Post About The Slutty Witch and The Cupcake

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 18:03:00 +0000

I heart Halloween.

It's a day of sweets and disguises.

And more sweets.

Here are three goodies I brought to the table.

Pumpkin Cupcakes with Cream Cheese icing. I bamboozled my nieces and nephew by making some of them look like pumpkins.

This recipe comes to me via my delightful coworker "Risa." She baked and our staff inhaled. They are that good.

The recipe came to her via Mother Martha.

Postrabbit: "Risa" has an incredible blog called "While I'm Waiting..." about the journey of faith and infertility. When I read it, I stop complaining about how big my calves are for any Fall boots. Perspective.

Bakerella strikes again. This time I ventured out and tried to make Cake Pops look like actual "things."

Did someone say "Bakerella?" This was my first attempt at Cupcake Bites. They kicked my cupcake tuckus. But they were the perfect treat to hand out while I was dressed like this:

Food Network provided the war plans for this Cupcake Costume. However, the strategy was outlined for a 7-year-old. I am not shaped like a 7-year-old in a variety of ways, with two standing out in particular.

That's why my frosting is a bit "off."

Dilemma.

This costume prevented me from bending at the knee or waist. Sitting AND eating my traditional Halloween hot dog became a trial.

But God provided a slutty witch to meet my need.

{Images: Jamie (sweets) / Randy Anderson (cupcake & kitty) / Tammy Stringfellow (witch & cupcake).}

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.42

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 01:26:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

A friend mentioned yesterday that very few generations can compare to Generation X's love for its past. This is why you're now forced to watch movies about toys we played with as children. This is the Rad Rabbit Recommends: 80's Edition.

Read

Take a breath before you start spewing about how Star Wars started in the 70's. You're correct. However, wee Jamie wasn't old enough to appreciate the swagger of Han Solo until Return of The Jedi hit the screen in 1983. The Stormtroopers 365 photo diary by Stéfan is one of my favorite things on the internet. Especially when the troopers hit the beach.

Watch

Forgive this trailer its 80's origins by remembering the subject matter. One of my most fabulous movies of all time - Back To The Future. I use the phrase "flux capacitor" on a regular basis. I always think of the color purple when I see Calvin Klein ads. And I'm confident terrorists drive DeLoreans. Plus, my birthdate makes a crucial cameo. A wonderful reason to love a movie.

Listen

Michael Jackson. A must-include on any great 80's mix tape. And who doesn't need one of those in their hatchback. MJ can best be found on the album The Essential Michael Jackson.

So what would you be stoked to find in an 80's time capsule?

The Post About Jamie Desperately Seeking Jamie

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 12:24:00 +0000

These pretty people got married this month.

Do you know how they met?

It's a multiple choice question.

a. They were classmates in Psychology 101 at college.
b. They shared a cubicle at their bank job.
c. They sat on the same pew during a revival service.
d. The girl, named Kelly Hildebrandt, looked up her own name on Facebook and met the boy, named Kelly Hildebrandt.

And then they fell in love.

What about these pretty people who are now allegedly dating.

They're named Taylor.

They'll probably birth babies who wear Chuck Taylors and play Taylor guitars and live happily ever after in Taylor, Texas.

Do you know a handsome, smart, funny and single guy named Jamie B. Golden?

I'm on the prowl.

The Post About How Swedish Fish Stink

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:38:00 +0000

I have Halloween candy on the brain.

And on the hips.

But let me should you what I'm not tempted by this week:

--previously posted October 28, 2008--

Trick-or-treating is not for the faint of heart. Great risks of embarrassment and dog attacks and neighbors refusing to open the door do not always reap great rewards. Here are what I believe to be the worst deposits to your pumpkin...

Swedish Fish
Swim back to your Scandinavian homeland - you disgusting red concoction. Also, the tagline to this unfortunate candy is "A friend you can eat." Umm...what?

Smarties
I am always surprised by how many people love smarties. Especially since they taste like chalk. It is the poor-man's sweet tart and I choose to live rich.

Tootsie Rolls
This is not chocolate. You can tell yourself it is. But you should check your pants, because they are probably on fire.

Peanut Butter Wax Candy
You know these, right? The chewy and what seemed to be expired candy in the wax wrappers. I Googled and could not find a name for them because the creator of this nasty treat is that ashamed.

Pennies

Technically not a candy, but I don't even like to find these in my couch. There is a reason the saying is "turn up like a bad penny." Because pennies are bad.

Honorable Mention

Apples with razorblades in them. Actually, apples without razorblades stink too.

What do you hate to find in the bottom of your Halloween bag?

The Post About New Television Romances

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 18:02:00 +0000

My last post generated some passionate discussion about shows I was dumping from my television relationships. Let's just say most folks think Gregory deserves a second chance.

And my mother is adamant on wanting to know who Ted procreates with on How I Met Your Mother or she's bailing. I'm definitely sticking with it because it's legen -waitforit- dary.

Here are a list of brand spankin' new shows that have taken my exes' place on the TiVo timer list:

1. Glee: I'm a gleek in the best possible way. It makes me want to sing Journey songs and throw slushies at coworkers.
2. Flash Forward: I love a show I cannot understand without watching it twice and taking notes. Plus, many Lost actors can be found here. This will make my grief and loss more bearable come Spring.
3. Modern Family: Filmed in the mockumentary style I adore, this show puts the fun back in dysfunction.
4. The Good Wife: It has Carol Hathaway and Mr. Big and Logan Huntzberger and Dan Rydell. Plus, really good scripts.
5. Community: Joel McHale can do no wrong. Especially when you pair him with kooky characters comparable to Mankini and Lou from The Soup.

So bring it. What new shows do you heart that I should heart too?

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.41

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 02:12:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

Read

"If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy, I can only conclude that I was not made for here." A coworker and I had a fascinating conversation this week about faith and trying to get to the basics. Her pastor tends to rely on selling Jesus when she's already signed the lease. I recommended Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. It avoids controversy and there's no stomping or yelling. It's free will faith at its finest and most persuasive.

Watch

I grew up on a one-mile road with two working farms. One pasture was just next door. And I love to eat good food - particularly fresh produce. This is why I loved The Future Of Food. This intriguing documentary provides an in-depth investigation into the reality of genetically modified foods that have been filling my belly for quite some time. You can watch the whole thing in that snazzy box above.

Listen

Will I admit that I discovered MoZella's music after watching "The Hills?" Probably not. She's very Lauryn Hill and Norah Jones with a twinge of happy. This song, "Light Years Away" is one of my faves. Her newest album, "Belle Isle" dropped this past week. It's also delightful.

The Post About TV Shows With An Expiration Date

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 03:15:00 +0000

I set up season pass timers on my TiVo for all my favorite shows.

I set up one-time timers for those new shows that I'm giving a chance.

And then there's the saddest TiVo procedure.

Delete.

I had no choice. Sometimes you have to cut your losses and run.

1. Jon & Kate Plus 8: Because they went crazy. And not in a good Kardashian way.
2. The Biggest Loser: Because when I watch it, I feel like the biggest loser. And not in a good way.
3. NCIS: Because Tony and Ziva never kissed. Wait, what? This show is about crime?
4. Fringe: Because Peter and Olivia never kissed. This show is about paranomal junk? Huh.
---and the hardest habit to break--
5. House: Gregory House - I really love you. But I think we need some space. It's not you, it's me. I hope we can still be friends.

Have any shows moved off your must-see list this year?

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.40

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 02:59:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

Read

If you like to visit multiple blogs or websites, you might want to try subscribing to their RSS Feeds. I use Google Reader (thanks to a suggestion by Scott Crews) and subscribe to 90. All the feeds of that HUGE number empty into my easy breezy feed reader when anything new is published. No need to visit 90 websites everyday just checking to see if there is a new post about cupcakes or picture of a cowboy. On my blog, you can do this by clicking on the orange RSS symbol on the right sidebar. This will direct you through the process of setting up a free “feed reader” account.

Watch

There are lot of things great about Birmingham, Alabama. Divine food, great music venues and lots of monogramming shops. But there is a darker side to my favorite city. Robin Williams exposes it at his most recent show in the Salty 'Ham. Learn more about this dark figure of whom he speaks.

Listen

So You Think You Can Dance is already back reminding me that I actually cannot crunk. But the good news is a whole new season of discovering music that will steal my heart and my savings. JJ Heller's Your Hands was featured on a recent audition episode. I now own two of her albums.

The Post About How Using Plastic Bags Helps The Terrorists Win

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:59:00 +0000

Blog Action Day is an annual event held every October 15 that unites bloggers in posting about the same issue on the same day with the aim of sparking discussion around important issue. This year's topic is Climate Change.

I'm actually very interested in simply being less of an annoyance to the temporary home God created for me. So I'm sharing a previous post about how I try to do that with a new bonus tip at the end.

Originally posted April 22, 2008

The Post About Tree Huggin' and Kissin'

Today is Earth Day. I know that means different things to different folks. We could probably even start a nice and juicy political discussion, but let’s not and say we did.

I’d like to focus only on the issues of simplicity and stewardship. I’m not someone you would call simple. Maybe simple-minded at times, but I’m all about the more the merrier in my life. More shoes, more caffeine, more Tivo, more miles on the car. But the newsflash is none of my worth comes from any of those things. Perhaps if I could embrace that, I would live a simpler life. Secondly, I believe any stuff I do have is actually on loan from God so I need to value it like I value Him.

Here are my quick tips on how we all can lead simpler and stewardishy lives:
a. Avoid buying bottled water. Get a nice shiny reusable aluminum bottle and fill it to your heart’s content.
b. Wash towels only after using them more than once. Be discerning about your dirtiness.
c. Get off junk mail lists. Greendimes will help make that happen.
d. Don't pre-rinse dishes. Tests show pre-rinsing doesn't improve dishwasher cleaning, and you'll save as much as 20 gallons of water per load.

NEW TIP: Use canvas grocery bags or reuse plastic bags. The production of plastic bags requires petroleum and often natural gas, both non-renewable resources that increase our dependency on foreign suppliers (hence, the terrorists winning). An estimated 8 billion pounds of plastic bags, wraps and sacks enter the waste stream every year in the US alone, putting an unnecessary burden on our diminishing landfill space and causing air pollution if incinerated. And they take 20-1000 years to biodegrade (depending on if the sun's hittin' it right.)

Do you have tips of your own? Do you?

{image: Jamie}

P.S. Don't forget to click the button for one of your favorite neighborhood bloggers. Just in case there's confusion, that's me.

The Post About Me and Your Newlywed Needs

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 01:03:00 +0000

I've served as a bridesmaid 9 times. And I've attended at least 55 weddings.

You want me at your nuptials.

Not because of my planning skills. Or storytelling skills. Or magic on the dance floor.

It's because of this story:

I once trekked to Michigan for the wedding of my best friend's brother. All of my friends were either groomsmen or a bridesmaid. Except me. God had a plan.

Immediately after the ceremony, the groomsmen rallied around the new husband and discovered he'd forgotten an important "tool" for the wedding night of two first-timers. Someone would need to run to the drugstore, but the photographer was waiting.

All eyes fell to me.

Although I'd never purchased or even needed this particular "tool," I decided now was the time to prove my worth. Moments later, I found myself wandering around a Rite-Aid in a little black dress and 4 inch heels looking for something related to Kentucky.

A guy approached me with his vest and his nametag and his adorable face and asked "Can I help you find something?" My palms were sweating at the prospect of answering that simple question. But I took a deep breath, summoned the courage and answered "Yes. Where's the toothpaste?"

He guided me to aisle 4 and smiled at his own helpfulness. It was a beautiful smile.

But I didn't need a tube of toothpaste.

After three overwhelming minutes, I stood wavering in front of a wall of "tools." I quickly grabbed the appropriate one and headed to the front. I exhaled in a Whitney Houston way when I saw the kind and motherly cashier checking customers out.

The final hurdle was upon me.

Sensing this single purchase would draw too much attention, I added a pack of Tic Tacs to my planned purchase.

Completely logical.

I was now the next to be helped and the finish line was in sight.

And then it happened.

Kind-and-motherly was replaced with adorable-face.

I placed my tube and my Tic Tacs on the counter and waited for the laughter and the pointing and the scarlet "J."

But adorable-face only asked "You know this isn't toothpaste, right?"

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.39

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 00:10:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

Read

I might be biased about author Donald Miller, due to my slight juvenile crush on him. Not on him - the actual person, but on him - the idea of him. A thinker who's got a sense of humor and loves God. I look forward to never meeting him in order to preserve that possible fabrication. His newest book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, is a well written and humorous glimpse into the process of Miller transitioning his bestseller, Blue Like Jazz, to the movie screen. A Million Miles will get you to thinking about your own life story. And the possible rewrite.

Watch

Drew Barrymore was hosting SNL last night and I was reminded how much I fancy her as an actress. And Cover Girl spokesperson. My favorite flick of hers is Ever After. It's the story of Danielle, the alleged inspiration for the Grimm Brothers' tale of Cinderella, who tries to rescue a fellow servant and becomes a queen. P.S. Anjelica Huston kills it as the evil stepmother.

Listen

I still own the cassette tape soundtracks to Top Gun and Footloose. Many movies I like more than necessary can be directly attributed to the musical background of one Kenny Loggins. Those movies include Caddyshack, Caddyshack II and One Fine Day. And don't even get me started on his album Return to Pooh Corner. I am tearing up just thinking about "The Last Unicorn."

P.S. I'm still working on that second job. Although my twitching eye would indicate it's a bad idea. Click for me.

The Post About How My Body is Fighting Back

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 17:29:00 +0000

The area below my eye started twitching 6 days ago.

And has not stopped.

Here's a brief and slightly creepy confessional:

Snickers are caffeine-free, right?

Any advice would be welcome.

The Post About How Badminton Mocked Me

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 13:07:00 +0000

I miss Emory University in the fall of each year.

And then I remember.

REQUIREMENT: four courses must include Health Education before graduation.

Yes. I was required to take PE at Emory to adequately earn a Bachelor’s in Sociology and Women’s Studies.

Currently, that would cost you $1,500+ per credit hour.

I took the following:
1. Aerobics: These classes are not fun if they cost a fortune or if they’re free. Boo to the grapevine and the Charleston and my lack of coordination.

2. Tennis: No regrets. I hung posters of Pete Sampras on our dorm door and I lusted after all things K-Swiss. I had a backhand that doesn’t mince words.

3. Badminton: Since I loved tennis, this seemed like an appropriate sister sport. This is accurate if that sister was the result of two first cousins procreating. Badminton is a mean and unforgiving sport.

And that brings us to the pièce de résistance…

4. Swimming.

It didn’t matter if you had taken 132 hours of classes and a graduate course in criminology and written a senior thesis on women in prison and been a teaching assistant and learned to park in a deck with only compact car spaces.

No.

If you couldn’t consecutively swim 10 laps in an Olympic regulation pool, then…

Well, I don’t know what would have happened.

Because I did it. I may have had a mini-stroke in the process, but I did it.

Once.

{image: frankphotos}

The Post About The Importance of Fonts

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 16:09:00 +0000

I love my job.

How can you not love work that seats you at a desk with this necessary work tool:

As a result of this steady sugar supply, I can be a bit obsessive. Particularly when it comes to fonts.

I know what you're thinking. Aren't there more important things to fixate on at your job, like budgets or strategic plans or orphans finding homes?

Sure, whatever. But fonts are very important too.

Times New Roman.

Boo. You stink. I hate you.
-------------------------------------

Eager Naturalist.

Great for casual events and making parenting seem like a breeze.
-------------------------------------

Poornut.

Probably not the best name for the kid-friendly font I used for my summer camp.
-------------------------------------

Ratty Tatty.

This was the official font for my social worker conference this year - a group who can sometimes be more particular than 10-year-olds away from home and strung out on candy.

I had decided if anyone at the conference upset me that I would call them a "ratty tatty" under my breath. As a stress reliever.

Who knew that "ratty tatty" is defined by the Urban Dictionary as "when a broad is skankily slutty and everybody knows it."

Maybe I did.

{image: Jamie}

P.S. You can vote for me to become a blogger for NatureMade. That would be really nice. Super nice.

The Post About Monkey See, Monkey Bread

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 13:29:00 +0000

One of my favorite blogs ever, The Pioneer Woman, is teaching me how to cook.

Slowly, but surely.

This week, I will show you my attempt at Monkey Bread. A delicacy including two of life's treasures - butter and carbs.

This was an easy breeezy recipe. Only 5 ingredients.

Hello, lover. Oh my, there are two of you.

Brown sugar to sweeten up that delicious pool of artery stuffing.

Quartered biscuits lying in wait.

No where in the recipe instructions did it call for me to start eating these little nuggets of goodness.

Spoiler Alert: Bloating.

The remaining biscuits were drowned in the butterybrownsugary lovely. They did not struggle.

Baked and upside down. Begging to be consumed, not shared.

But I did share.

The array of platters available to me was limited. So my gambling plate made its first appearance at church.

Also, in the time it took me to turn around and grab my camera, the ravenous Christ followers were already thinking of naptime.

Pastor Ryan's Monkey Bread recipe (PDF)

{images: Jamie}

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.38

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 00:37:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

Read

I recently saw a trailer for Amelia which hits the theaters on October 23. Although I'm not a card-carrying member of the Hilary Swank-y club, I adore the history of Ms. Earhart. Since I'm always on the hunt for a good sequel, I Was Amelia Earhart by Jane Mendelsohn hit just the spot. This short novel packs quite a punch as it weaves fact and fiction in the "what happened next" after Amelia and her navigator disappeared somewhere over the Pacific Ocean during their attempt to fly around the world. I don't care if it's pretend. I am choosing to believe.

Watch

I'm going to be straight with you right out of the gate. This may only be hilarious to me. I heart Ricky Gervais.

Listen

I've already recommended the television show Glee in the RR, but the music deserves a mention in this section as well. I joined my high school choir after dropping Calculus my senior year (already had the college scholarships, so functions were no longer required in my limited perspective.) I wish we had been a show choir. Without the matching outfits. Enjoy this unique and fabulous version of Queen's Somebody to Love.

The Post About Being Southern and Aging Rapidly

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 00:25:00 +0000

My Mom and I recently attended a Southern Show. These exhibitor events take place all over the South, as well as in the honorary Southern cities of Cleveland and Novi, Michigan.

These multi-day samplaloozas force you to face the sources of your greatest fears and greatest joys:

Weight
Aging
Health
Fashion
Food

The best part of this emotional journey is the free stuff.

Thanks to my friend Jem, I'm obsessed with canvas grocery totes. So now I own 23.

There are cooking demos by great local chefs and companies where they feed you fish and teach you how to fish. And by "fish," I mean "deep fry."

If you don't have White Lily baking products where you live, you should move. Then you can make phenomenal biscuits and live closer to me. Win, win.

One sample I received is questionable:

I don't think the Naming Department at Metamucil should win any awards. Unless it's the "Most Likely to Reflect What Happens After Consumption" award. Congratulations.

The most overwhelming experience from the Southern Women's Show involved a questionnaire my mother and I completed at a health booth. After answering a series of inquiries, your "true" health age was revealed. My soon-to-be-60-year-old Mom discovered her health age was 52. Yay for Mummy!

I stepped up, completed the quiz, and was informed that I too am 52.

Oops.

{images: Jamie}

The Post About My Love/Hate with McDonald's

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 17:55:00 +0000

McDonald's.

There's a part of me that wants to hate it. It wants to point its finger at the saturated fat and the influenza-ed playplace. It wants to shake its head at the onions on the cheeseburger ordered without onions.

But it doesn't point. And it doesn't shake.

Why?

Because of my most recent experience.

First, I read this great article: 10 Secret Menu Items at Fast Food Restaurants. I tried my first secret order at In-N-Out Burger while in California on vacation. I ordered my burger "Animal Style" which made me slap my knee. Too yummy.

Next up was the Neopolitan Shake from McDonald's. It's just what you're dreaming of. A layer of chocolate, a layer of strawberry, topped with a layer of strawberry. This milkshake made me want to birth babies so they could experience the overwhelming sense of gladness brought about by this concoction.

You too can feel glad.

But there's still that part of me wanting to judge McDonald's.

Perhaps it's because of this:

There's so much wrong.

Can you find all the wrongness?

{image: Jamie}

The Post About Cheez and Chips

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 22:27:00 +0000

I heart Cheez-its. I love every flavor and every size serving.

I love them more than my muffin top should allow.

So imagine the giddy that ensued when this arrived in my mailbox:

Lisa at Parallel Botany sent me this fabulous dose of happiness. I squealed.

Lisa has a delightful blog full of creative and beautiful things I like to look at. And wish I could make show up at my house.

Seems like it worked.

She also has free wallpaper. Coiled Rainbow is currently taking up real estate on my desktop.

Thank you Lisa.

Speaking of things I love to put in my belly...

By themselves, none of these really intrique me. Except maybe that adorable jalapeno hiding behind the lime.

But if you get out your knives that can cut aluminum cans and wield a little magic, then you get this:

I have made it my life's work to find the perfect salsa.

My work here is done.

Quick and Easy Salsa - Pampered Chef Amy
3-4 tomatoes (chopped)
1/4-1/2 onion (chopped)
1 whole jalapeno pepper (stemmed, seeded, and diced)
½ cup fresh cilantro leaves (finely chopped)
1 clove of garlic (pressed)
1/2 tsp of salt
1 tsp of lime zest (the green skin stuff)
Juice of 1 marred lime

Gather them all in a moment of silence and then marry them. Then say a prayer of thankfulness for the blogger who brought this to you.

My #1 suggestion for co-consumption would be these:

But Tostito's thought little of me and recently discontinued these heavenly chips.

But Tostito's thought much of me and recently started selling these heavenly-er chips.

Revel in the goodness.

{images: Jamie, Parallel Botany, Jamie, Tostito's}

The Post About The Rabbit Recommends v.37

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 23:15:00 +0000

Each weekend, I post a readable, a watchable, and a listenable of which I'm fond. You can choose what happens next. Earlier volumes can be found here.

Read

A blog that's funny is always a bonus. My apologies. Lovely Listings is a comical collection of all those things people think are fine to keep in their house while it's on the market, but don't. And then their house doesn't sell and they fire their agent because they think it's her fault. But it's not. It's the 60+ dolls they have displayed in their sunroom. This happened to me.

Watch

I've rented three movies in the last two weeks. Duplicity and Wolverine completely disappointed - except for the abs of one Hugh Jackman. But State of Play is a different film. Phenomenal cast and topsy turvy plot that keeps you guessing. Really. Reporter investigates the murder of a congressman's assistant and he discovers a big fat conspiracy. Jason Bateman alone makes it worth two hours of your time.

Listen

The Family Followill band (a.k.a. Kings of Leon) is quite enjoyable. I play this song, Closer, way more than appropriate. You should download them immediately. And legally.

The Post About What's Adorable for Some...

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 03:06:00 +0000

A rubber band wrist on a baby is absolutely delicious.

A rubber band wrist on an adult is a sign of an imminent coronary.

I need to start working out. Or aging backwards.

{image: Jamie}

The Post About Putting the Cart Before the Horse

jamiesrabbits@gmail.com (Jamie) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 00:34:00 +0000

Some things in life are absurd.

Children dying of preventable diseases. Drunk driving. Racism.

And then there's the truly absurd.

People who don't know what to do with a shopping cart after they're finished using it.

There are two groups of shoppers I need to address.
1. Those who leave the cart in the middle of a parking space or near a pole or on the end of an aisle. NONE of these are suitable resting places for your used buggy. NONE. There are only two appropriate spots. The first is the parking space with rails that usually has a large sign reading "Your Cart Goes Here. Thank You." The second is back inside the store usually near an elderly person welcoming you to the shopping establishment.

2. Those who manage to steer their cart to the above mentioned corral area, but fail to follow the universally agreed upon system of storage. Carts are intended to be pushed into one another. Not parallel or perpendicular or in the shape of your astronomical sign.

If you fall into either of these categories, I accept your apology.

{image: Jamie}