I've Changed My Name To Mommy

Happy Anniversary

2009-11-08T07:27:00.000-08:00

The woman who settled down at 16 and whose relationship resulted in 3 children has (according to the CDC) a 30.01% chance of still being with the same person after 7 years.

What can I say, I'm stubborn.

That's probably why, rather than writing the gushing love post to Hubby I planned to write about pitter pattering hearts in honor of our 7th anniversary, I'm writing this post instead. The truth is, I'm not feeling very pittery. I'm exhausted, my teeth are killing me, and I'm buried up to my eyeballs in independent contract work-some that are trying to negotiate me down to 1/4 of my price, and some that won't even pay me until January. For the last few days I've been perpetually on the prowl for the next person to piss me off so that I can destroy them....I'm the freakin' fairy of flippin' fun right now....and do you know what the best part is?

Hubby loves me anyway.

That's right-I haven't gotten out of my pajamas since Friday. I haven't brushed my hair in that time and I've only taken one shower. I smell like that special putrid blend of Eau de Mommy, and my disposition is twice as sour, but my husband loves me no matter how I act or smell.

He doesn't care that I've gained 25lbs since The Bean was born either-he still thinks I'm sexy (and I've got the hickeys to prove it). He doesn't care that I'm a mess at this point, he would never leave me. He'd fight me, for sure-he's always pushing me to do more and do better for myself, even when I'd rather fight him than listen to him-but he doesn't mind fighting my ridiculous stubbornness....if that's what's best for me he'd fight me for me forever.

That's what a real relationship is all about. It's easy to think in the abstract about all of the ooooey gooey mushy love fluff, but when you're in a committed-forever relationship you have to have more than that or you'll fail. It's also easy to set up a system in your head and pretend that things will always work that way, but that rarely happens either. Real love has romance, and there is some direction, but mostly it is a lot of hard work. It's loving someone no matter what-thick or thin, grumpy or happy, exhausted or well rested, poor or rich, foul or fragrant-that's unconditional love. It's a lot of hard work, but it's worth it. Just ask Hubby....

....Though maybe not right now, because he already got an earful today while I was on one of my fury rampages and I'm pretty sure he just wants to sleep peacefully at the moment.

Happy 7th Anniversary Lovey Bear~
With all my heart,
Your petulant but adoring wife

Downward Dog, Drunken Bear

2009-11-05T01:29:00.000-08:00

When I got pregnant with The Bean (six months after delivering Baby Bug) I was 15lbs overweight. I gained 13lbs during my pregnancy, delivered, and at my six week check up I had lost 20lbs, making me only 8lbs overweight. Awesome, right? Then my newly acquired practice of eating one meal a day at 9pm after the kids go to bed, due to time constraints, caused my metabolism to commit harakiri rather than face it's obvious uselessness....and I GAINED 25lbs. That's right-I'm heavier now than I was when I delivered our third child.

GAG.

I tried returning to vegetarianism, but sadly it turns out that we can't afford to buy all of the food necessary to maintain a balanced vegetarian lifestyle in addition to all the animal meat required to sustain Hubby and the kidlets. I'm still eating pretty healthy, even if meat is included at this point, but let's face it-that's not getting me any closer to the rockin' pre-baby bod that I fantasize about regaining. It's time to pull out the big guns.

Exercise.

I'll tell you now-I hate exercise! I have SVT and while exercise is a good way to strengthen your heart and lower blood pressure and it is thus commonly recommended that people with SVT exercise (at a comfortable level) daily, it can also trigger an attack. Those suck. A lot-so I have generally avoided anything more than low impact exercise and have certainly not done anything daily since before Monkey was born.

I've got to face the facts though-that has to change. It might suck to have an attack, and exercise in general might suck (it totally does), but being The Blob sucks more (and, funny enough, is also bad for my heart)....so exercise it is.

I told you a little while ago about my "fun" with hip hop cardio. I decided to try belly dancing. Yeahnotsomuch. I thought I looked bad doing the hip hop thing-belly dancing was just ludicrous. I didn't even have to look at my reflection in the fire place to now that I looked like a fool. So, back I went to my drunken bear marionette antics of hip hop cardio. Now I do that for an hour, plus I added in a half hour of Pilates/Power Yoga and put in 30 crunches on each side (to the front, to the left, and to the right) for good measure [all doc approved].

I look like a total idiot. My body feels like it has been hit with a Mac truck. Still, I must have burned like a bizillion calories by now.

In the end I know it will be worth it. I want to be healthy, and I want to teach my kids to be active. [Monkey already "did" the Pilates/Power Yoga with me...he calls it Karate, and he has his mother's grace.]

Plus, I really really want my 17 year old body back.

Wordless (kindof) Wednesday: Halloween!

2009-11-03T23:32:00.000-08:00

The Kidlets this Halloween
Monkey (the Silly Skeleton)

Baby Bug (the Bumble Bee)

The Bean (the Lady Bug)

We all had so much fun visiting grandpa and grandma and going Trick or Treating! Well, The Bean didn't go (she preferred snuggling with grandma), and Baby Bug could only say "Hi! Hi! Thank you! Bye-Bye!", but Monkey definitely Trick or Treated. He was so adorable going around to my dad's neighbors and saying TRICK OR TREAT!! as loud as he could. Even more adorable-after they gave him candy he said "Thank you-I love you" to every person that gave him candy. Too too cute!

Tell All Tuesday: An Attitude of Gratitude

2009-11-02T22:47:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I read Kirsty's post about the things she is thankful for, and about her decision to continue giving thanks for five things each day. I immediately felt convicted-lately it has been very hard for me to be thankful. Our budget is so tight it squeaks, and we juggle our bills with a precariousness that is usually reserved for circus side shows. Hubby's hours are being cut, and I'm spending more than twice the amount we usually spend just to buy the same groceries we always have-and yet I know that there is so much for me to be grateful for....I just need to refocus myself and remember to keep an attitude of gratitude....

I am thankful for my husband. He breaks his back working graveyards to support our family the very best he can. He does it with love and out of love and is never bitter. He is calm when I am panicking. He is strong when I am weak. He is my very best friend. I can't imagine my life without him.

I am thankful for our children. They are such good natured little creatures-generally speaking of course. They can raise hell with the best of them, but in their hearts they are all so kind and well mannered. They are a constant reminder to me of what it is like to love with your whole heart, and live every day in a positive way.

I am thankful for my independent contractor work. It is far from steady, but somehow whenever we are so financially cornered that there seems to be no out a project comes along in time to ease the burden a little.

I am thankful for beating the odds. I have beat so many odds in the last eight years that it is definitely something worth being grateful for. For instance, only two percent of high school sweethearts ever get married and only twenty percent of teen parents stay together (with sixty percent of them ending up separated before their child turns four). Hubby and I fall into both categories and celebrate 7 years this Saturday.

You know, I feel better. No matter how tough things may get sometimes I think I just have to remember that I have been through worse, and many people are still living through worse. I really do have a lot to be grateful for...I think that everyone does. What are you thankful for?

It's Like This

2009-11-02T02:15:00.000-08:00

Right before my fabulous SITS day, I got an award. I haven't gotten around to it until now (just like so so many emails...but I'm getting there!) but I wanted to be sure to post it, because I feel a particular attachment to this award.

It's the Tell It Like It Is Award from The Crazy Baby Mama for "bloggers who use the language of humor to speak the truth".

Thank you so much, Baby Mama. Now, true to form, I will now proceed to tell it.

I have had it up to my eyeballs with Perfect Mom.

You know the one-she walks around on tip toes and makes flowing hand gestures. She delicately scrap books the daily pictures she takes of her children into a hand made memory book. She uses her Snow White sing-song voice to tell you how beautiful motherhood is and how perfect her children are and how she could never be upset with her "little blessings". I get it. My kids are blessings too, and I love them with all my heart. Truly. But if you are trying to tell me that motherhood is all sunshine all the time you are either:

A. Lobotomized
B. On enough meds to take out a baby elephant
C. Lying through your teeth
D. The proud mommy of a Yorkie

My kids are blessings-but they are also tiny ninjas bent on destruction. My kids are angels-particularly while they are sleeping. I love motherhood-but I do not hesitate to extend nap time by an hour when the spawnlings are causing too much chaos for me to handle. I love my children with all of my heart-and some days that is the ONLY thing that prevents me from putting them in large dog crates and selling them on EBay. I get tired, I get mad, I get impatient, I get overwhelmed, I get lonely

and you do too.

Come on and admit it, Perfect Mom. I have actually spent time raising children...you can't lie to me. Say it LOUD and say it PROUD

MY KIDS MAKE ME FLIPPIN' CRAZY [but I love them anyway]

There now, don't we all feel better?

I Like Halloween, Just Not Scary Things

2009-10-31T02:10:00.000-07:00

When I was younger, I used to like scary movies. The Final Destination and Urban Legend series were some of my favorite movies when I was a teenager. I like getting freaked out over what was going to happen next and trying to figure out who the "bad guy" was. Now as an adult I don't watch scary movies. Ever. The scariest movie I've watched in years was Pan's Labyrinth and that was by accident-I thought it was supposed to be more of a fairy tale. I just can't watch scary movies anymore and I remember exactly the moment when I turned that corner.

When I was 17 I was living with three roommates in a house in an older section of town. My three roommates lived upstairs in different sections of the house and I took the room in the basement because it was bigger and had a semi-private entrance. Usually though I hung out and watched TV and surfed the web upstairs in the living room because that was the nicest part of the house. It had a huge fluffy couch and a way bigger TV than I had in my room and a huge 60 gallon aquarium filled with beautiful tropical fish.

On one of my nights off my roommate invited me to watch a movie with him and his girlfriend on the big TV upstairs. Hubby (who was "just" my boyfriend at the time) was working and not able to come over until the wee hours of the morning, so I figured it would be a fun way to be distracted and not just sit around bored while I waited for him to get to my place. They had rented The Ring. Remember, at this point, I still loved scary movies so I'd been watching and waiting for it to come out to be available to rent and I was super excited to watch.

It was, by far, THE SCARIEST MOVIE I HAVE EVER SEEN. Just the thought of it still nearly sends me into a panic attack it was that freakin' scary. At least, to me. I'll spare you the super scary parts, but basically it's about a tape that if you watch it someone calls you and tells you that you're going to die in 7 days. And then you do-because your TV magically turns on by itself and a bone chilling little girl crawls out of a well, then straight out of your TV and gets you, leaving water puddles on your floor.

Scared. The. Pee. Out. Of. Me.

I decided that the best way to calm down would be to go lay down in my room and read my favorite book (Wuthering Heights, totally not scary) and wait for Hubby to come. As I laid on my bed reading my book I was doing fine...until I heard water. Trust me, you do not want to hear running water directly after you watch this movie. I start panicking a little until I realize hey-the aquarium is directly above me. I tell myself no big deal. Calm down. Read your book.

Then the power flashes.

And my TV turns itself on.

And I scream (and maybe pee myself a little).

Still, I tell myself to get a grip. The power flashed. Whatever. It happens. My TV is old. The circuits in the house are weird. Maybe I sat on the remote. Whatever-just get up and unplug the TV and you'll feel better. So I sit up and swing my legs over the side of the bed and go to unplug the TV..............and step in a giant puddle of water.

I totally lost it. I run screaming upstairs, crying my eyes out. Not my most shining moment, especially once my roommate figured out that it was just the washer (also located in the basement) which had a broken hose. Still, logic or no logic, I was scared out of my skin so I invited myself to sleep on the floor in my roommate's room-on the side away from the door-until Hubby came over. My roommate and his girlfriend were TOTALLY laughing at me, but I didn't care. That stuff was scary.

Ever since, I haven't been a big fan of scary things and every year I get less and less tolerant. Still, after Monkey was born I made one exception---Halloween! I actually really like it now-from the Mom side of things it isn't scary at all! I get to dress up the babies in adorable costumes and take them to my parents' house where they can collect candy....most of which Baby Bug is still conveniently too young to eat, but not too young to share with Mommy.

MMMMMMM-Candy.

AAAAAAAAW-Adorable Costumes.

Yep, I like Halloween.....so long as it isn't scary.

I hope everyone has a fun, safe, adorable, delicious Halloween!

Hide the Dishes and Stuff the Junk in the Closet!

2009-10-27T23:31:00.000-07:00

I am so excited to be hosting the lovely ladies of SITS here today! [I'm so excited that I'm hosting you all online and not in my currently disaster-level dirty house.] The community at The Secret is In The Sauce has been so fabulous-I have loved discovering a new blog each day, I have found some wonderful new bloggy friends, and I have thoroughly enjoyed the Featured Bloggers. That's why I'm so honored and excited to be the Featured Blogger for today! I'll offer you a virtual cup of tea [all of my real tea cups are dirty anyway].

Okay, so I may have said excited a few too many times. Sorry. I try to be more creative than that but I'm really, er, stoked about this. It's hard not to go all golden-retriever-when-their-owner-drives-up on you guys. Deep breath. Calm. Right.

Welcome to my blog. I'm MrsM, and I'm the wife of Hubby and the stay at home unschooling mom of three kidlets Monkey(5), Baby Bug(20 months), and The Bean(5 months). My blog is the place I go to meet new people and share what's on my mind. I wish there was some sort of a theme that I could present to you but mostly the recurring themes here are "Ooh, shiny!", "Something weird I did", "You'll never believe what the kids did", and "Randomness". I write about unschooling, I write about marriage, I write about eating junk food while watching The Biggest Loser, I write about my drunken-bear approach to exercise....it's a lot of fun.

I love meeting new bloggy friends, so on Fridays I often feature one of my blog followers for Mommy's Fabulous Find Friday. I also try to do a review and giveaway about once a month. Oh-and I make sure to tell a lot of funny stories about the kids which they will totally hate me for later. I'm already saving for therapy, I might as well make it count! LoL!

I guess the best way for you to see what I'm about is to read my posts for yourself. Might I suggest a few?

Motherhood Down and Dirty............in which I talk about how motherhood has changed me.

5 Minutes is More Than Enough........in which I expose exactly how wild the kidlets get.

I'd love to get your opinion on Pregnancy-Is Age Just A Number?

And if you're in the mood for a good laugh about marriage and getting older I think Somewhere between CSPAN and the Backseat would be a good read for you.

Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by SITSas, and for the fabulous opportunity to be today's featured blogger!

I'm going to have to go and see if I've finished the last of my chill pills (they're secretly M&Ms ssssssssh!)....

Friend Makin' Monday: Movie Time!

2009-10-26T01:41:00.000-07:00

It's time for Friend Makin' Monday again, coming to us from our friend Amber at aefilkins. This week's topic is

If life were a movie, which movie would you want to live in?

I had to think about this for a while. It has to be a movie I like, in which none of the main characters have anything significantly terrible happen to them, and which also has a happy ending. I love The Notebook, but fear Alzheimer's to the core of my being. I love Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon but come on...I'm not living like THAT. I'm not living in Shaun of the Dead either (me+zombies, even funny ones=no thank you). 10 Things I Hate About You was definitely a front runner, but I decided that I would not appreciate being in high school for the rest of my life.

So my pick is Pride and Prejudice.

I love this movie (and the book of course). Both Elizabeth and the ravishing Mr. Darcy live unaffected by illness or terrible tragedy, and they end up together happily ever after-perfectly suited for each other. Also, it takes place in 18th/early 19th Century England which has always seemed beautiful and romantic to me. As long as I got to be Elizabeth and Hubby got to be the heart throbbingly fabulous Mr. Darcy I think I'd be happy there.

What movie would you live in? Join Friend Makin' Monday and share!

I (DO NOT) Got Rythm

2009-10-25T01:32:00.000-07:00

I'm talented in many ways. My desserts are delightful. My singing is sweet. I'm semi-technology talented....but when it comes to gross motor skills I am SOOO lacking. You're talking to the woman who tripped UP a hill. Twice. In the same day. I am just not coordinated in my movements.

So whatever on earth possessed me to try some hip hop cardio? It can only be explained by temporary insanity since I very well know that it is simply impossible for me to force my body to move in one seamless, quick, coordinated movement after another. I should know this better than anyone, I just got too enthusiastic.

It started earlier this evening when I found a TV channel I didn't know that we had. Turns out that when I've got as many channels as I do, entire networks can just go unnoticed forever. Well, almost forever-today I finally noticed Fit TV. It is a 24-hour-a-day 7-day-a-week diet and fitness channel!

Holy-Bending-Yogi Batman.

I've been looking for a way to find the time to exercise, and now workout time is 24 hours a day! Fit TV is run by the Discovery network, not surprising since I already LOVE the other Discovery Channels, and features fun workouts like Shimmy (a belly dancing workout) and Namaste Yoga.

Workouts like All Star Workouts:Hip Hop Dance with MaDonna Grimes. [Dun-Dun-Dun]

This workout caused me to flop around the living room like I was some kind of drunk grizzly bear marionette. Don't get me wrong-it was definitely a workout. I broke into a serious sweat (which I'm sure you're happy to know) and I think it would be an awesome program for anyone who is even slightly more coordinated than I am-a Koala Bear, for instance.

Or, if you're grace-challenged but impulsive like I am you can still try it....though I recommend doing it when no one else is home and with your blinds closed. Also, be sure to remove any reflective surfaces in your workout space, or you'll be laughing so hard at yourself that you won't be able to keep up and you'll get the whole routine mixed up...then you'll REALLY look stupid. I speak from experience here.

And it while was a fun experience, but I think I'm just going to hold out for something that doesn't make me feel like such a fool. I'll let you know how belly dancing goes....

[Picture from NYMag.com]

Congratulations are in Order!

2009-10-25T01:25:00.000-07:00

Random.Org has spoken, and the winner of the personalized tote bag from Noah Baby Boutique is

The Psycho Mama

Congrats to you, Mama! I'd also like to thank all of you who took the time to enter the giveaway-and don't worry, there is another chance to win a fabulous prize coming up in November!!

Fabulous Find Friday (Saturday Edition): Angela from Becoming Me

2009-10-24T00:33:00.001-07:00

First I'd like to welcome you to the Saturday edition of Mommy's Fabulous Find Friday. Turns out my Friday was super booked-I'm so sorry that I couldn't get this out in time! You know how much I love featuring YOU, my fabulous followers, and I'm especially disappointed because this week Random.Org magically selected one of my very favorite bloggers and personal bloggy friends

Angela from Becoming Me

I met Angela a long time ago. I've followed her blog and done a little designing on it and we've gotten to know each other pretty well. She is a terrific lady, and a wonderful writer, and I am so happy that I get the opportunity to introduce you to her! Let's get started...

So Angela, tell us about yourself ...
Twenty years ago I was a shy small town girl who barely spoke above a whisper. Today, I'm not so shy. I'm a flawed and forgiven child of God, wife, & mother. My daughter is five, sweet and spunky and my son is two, curious, and fun! I am also a writer, a lover of books, coffee, girl's night out, sunshine & waterfalls.

And of course everyone wants to know where we can find your writing...
I blog at www.becomingme.net and I also write biweekly devotions at 5 minutes for Faith and I write monthly at (in) courage.

Curious minds want to know-who and/or what inspires you to blog?
I started blogging about 18 months ago and continue so that I can encourage other women to know that they are not alone in their struggles.

Please share with us your favorite posts so far!
I have a favorite post section on my blog

What writers (and/or bloggers) do you read regularly?
This will look horrible, but I have been behind on blog reading lately. I honestly do love the writings of all the other (in) courage bloggers as well as those who write for 5 Minutes for Faith. And I love Big Mama, because she makes me laugh out loud...and of course I love MrsM!

Awww-I love Angela! So what are your future plans for your writing/blog?
To "keep on keeping on" and hopefully write more often.

I look forward to reading what you have to say, whenever you say it! And now, for something completely different.......

What three things would you bring with you onto a deserted island?
Matches, a knife, and a blanket

Who was your favorite childhood pet and why?
My first dog whom I named Princess.

What is your hidden talent?
I am "double jointed" and can cross my elbows and index fingers and then fit my head through the hole it forms.

In a movie starring your life, who would you cast as the main characters?
Drew Barrymore would have to play me. I think she would be able to best capture my quirky, fast-talking and awkward sides, but also be able to convey vulnerability, warmth and determination. Zooey Deschanel could play my sister Maranda and my youngest sister JeanAnn would be best protrayed by Abbie Cornish.

What an interesting cast that would be...and Drew Berrymore is such a great actress I think she might be able to do you justice! Thank you so much for agreeing to participate in Fab Friday Angela, and of course thank you for following my blog!

Okay bloggy friends, if you haven't had the pleasure already please go and check out Becoming Me! Angela is so insightful and inspirational, I promise you'll enjoy what she has to say. When have I ever steered you wrong?

[Remember, if you want a chance to be my featured follower on Mommy's Fabulous Find Friday all you have to do is be a follower! If you choose to subscribe in a reader or bookmark my page, you'll have to make sure to leave a comment so that I can include you in the drawing.]

Just In Case You're Interested....

2009-10-23T08:59:00.000-07:00

I did a guest post on unschooling over at the Best of Both Worlds at Home blog. A big thank you to Tammy for giving me the opportunity!

If you happen to go over and read it, let me know what you think!

Motherhood-Down and Dirty

2009-10-22T01:58:00.000-07:00

How has motherhood changed me? Just look at a picture of me before I had children....

As you may or may not notice, I am very well groomed in that picture. I mean coiffed. My hear is permed and styled. I am wearing make up in that picture. That used to be an every day occurrence...now I consider it a 'fancy' day if I have enough time to put on a bra and pants that have a zipper.

In this picture, though I know you are all far too polite to notice, I am also 40lbs lighter. And who are we kidding, that's not baby weight...that's roughly the weight of my five year old. Truth be told, I have gained 25lbs since delivering The Bean. Turns out eating one meal a day at nine o'clock at night after the kids have gone to bed is the equivalent of metabolism suicide.

Lastly, though you can't tell from the picture, I can assure you that I smelled like vanilla and roses. That was my 'scent' back before I had children. Now my scent is the sour stench of spit up with just a hint of peanut butter, since I have no desire to change my clothes 600 times a day after each time that I am used as a human napkin.

Before I had children I was put together, I smelled nice, and I was thin-but that's obvious. The real secret here is that I wouldn't change the way things are now for all the money-or vanilla bubble baths-in the world. Motherhood has changed me on the inside as well.

Motherhood has given me more patience, enough to answer every "why?" with a smile as I watch my childrens' world expand and their minds open to new things.

Motherhood has made me more compassionate as I realize now that every person on this planet is someone's baby.

Motherhood has shown me how to be more flexible, since nothing ever works out the way you plan it but somehow always works out okay in the end.

Motherhood has made me brave. Brave enough to face my flaws, and brave enough to fix them. Brave enough to say I DON'T KNOW, but I will learn. Brave enough to raise three children five and under on three hours of sleep a night....and if I'm brave enough to do that, there is no stopping me.

I am Mommy. The reader of the bedtime stories. The kisser of boo boos. The recipient of crayon art, couch snuggles, and the pure unconditional adoring love of three amazing children. Motherhood has certainly made some messy changes, but it is still the best thing that has ever happened to me.

[This is written in response to this week's Writer's Workshop. Visit Mama Kat to see more and participate!]

Wordless Wednesday: Sharing

2009-10-21T00:22:00.001-07:00

Stories bring people...even my little people...together

Hey FTC-Endorse THIS

2009-10-18T22:23:00.000-07:00

As you may have noticed, I regularly do reviews and giveaways. I like trying new products and telling you guys about my experience, then giving you an opportunity to win the product itself-it's fun and come on-who doesn't like to win something cool? Unfortunately the FTC just made it harder for bloggers to have access to review and giveaway opportunities.

At the beginning of October the FTC announced they had approved the final revisions to it’s Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising. Shortly thereafter, they released the full text of this new law and the problems were immediately apparent.

In brief, this law requires all bloggers to disclose any material relationships behind reviews and giveaways-which is in itself a good policy that most review and giveaway bloggers already do on their own. [You can see my disclosure directly under my header.] This law also requires bloggers to apply to 'truth in advertising' standards, which again is a good policy and again is already practiced by most bloggers.

Here's the real problem-if a blogger makes a claim about a product that is considered "unsubstantiated" the advertiser is liable. This is an example, directly from the FTC guidelines:

Example 5: A skin care products advertiser participates in a blog advertising service. The
service matches up advertisers with bloggers who will promote the advertiser’s products on
their personal blogs. The advertiser requests that a blogger try a new body lotion and write
a review of the product on her blog. Although the advertiser does not make any specific
claims about the lotion’s ability to cure skin conditions and the blogger does not ask the
advertiser whether there is substantiation for the claim, in her review the blogger writes
that the lotion cures eczema and recommends the product to her blog readers who suffer
from this condition. The advertiser is subject to liability for misleading or unsubstantiated representations made through the blogger’s endorsement. The blogger also is subject to
liability for misleading or unsubstantiated representations made in the course of her
endorsement. The blogger is also liable if she fails to disclose clearly and conspicuously
that she is being paid for her services.

So the question becomes, what constitutes unsubstantiated claims? If I review a candle and I said I find the smell "relaxing" is that unsubstantiated, since that is not scientifically documented? The new rules say it could be-and if it were determined in a court of law that it was not only would I personally be subject to an $11,000 fine but the advertiser would have to pay out as well.

This effects bloggers tremendously-if a company sends it's product for review or giveaway to another company the advertiser is NOT liable for any unsubstantiated or misleading claims, but if they send their product to a blogger they could have to pay, big time. For the record, this law also includes all "endorsements" posted on Twitter, Amazon, Facebook, or any other online venue.

This new law discourages companies from seeking to advertise online directly through consumers and, let's be honest, severely hampers bloggers attempting to make some money via their sites. It takes even more power away from the consumer, who is now liable for their own personal opinions, and makes endorsements a business-to-business transaction.

This is bad news.

Still, even after reading this law, I will continue to do giveaways...provided that companies and advertisers are still willing to work with me (or any other blogger for that matter)...because I still feel that the best, most powerful form of advertising should be the friend to friend, word of mouth, consumer powered kind and that you, my readers, should still win free stuff for being so fabulous.

Free stuff like the Personalized Tote from Noah Baby Boutique that I am giving away through 10/24. It's fabulous and I endorse it. Come and get me FTC.

The Kids Are Just Alright

2009-10-18T02:59:00.000-07:00

Like the old saying says,"There is only one prettiest child in the world and every mother has it". As parents it's natural for us to be proud of our children, but sometimes what starts out as well meaning encouragement can turn them into monsters...and that only makes sense. In the over effuse, effervescent world of everybody wins it's easy for a kid to take that tiny step from a healthy sense of self esteem into Divaland.

Of course as parents we only have the best of intentions. We love our children, we support our children, and we want them to know it. Every parenting book out there has information on how to build your child's self esteem, and how important it is to do so. What the books are lacking, however, is a guide to instilling self esteem without making them think they are The Great and Powerful Oz.

Here are some thoughts from Juice Box Jungle on the subject....
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Mommy's Fabulous Find Friday-Katie from Why Bother

2009-10-16T02:35:00.000-07:00

Aaaaalright, everybody. It's time (finally!) to once again feature one of YOU for Fab Find Friday. I love getting to know you better, and sharing all of your fabulous blogs with everybody else!

This week Random.Org hit upon a truly fabulous lady....follower number 35

Katie (aka Kekibird) from Why Bother

I am thrilled to be featuring Katie this week. Katie is among the first followers I had, and I can honestly say that her comments have always been thoughtful and sweet. She is genuine, and funny, and the more I've gotten to know her the more I like her!

Katie's character shows up in her blog as well-but before you hop over for a visit, check out Katie's interview!

So, tell us about yourself (Family/friends/pets? Career/hobbies? Fun facts? Hidden talents? Medical oddities?)...
I’m Katie, a single mom to a high spirited little boy. Jake and I live in Southern California where the seasons vary slightly and you need a freeway to go 5 miles. Between my S.O. and I, we have 3 boys, all names with “J” names and all very much boys.

I lived in the City by the Bay for 6 years while I went to college at San Francisco State University for my BA and my teaching credential. Oh, the fog and the hills! I loved the city and history and the bridges!

Though I have a teaching credential, I am not currently a teacher. I work for the family business along side my dad and my brother and a few uncles and cousins. Yeah, when I say the “family” in family business, I honestly mean FAMILY! We cut and process steel for distribution.

On the side I scrapbook, make cards and try my best to raise my son to be a courteous, silly, genuine little guy. I’ve been known to attempt quilting, cooking, baking and sewing but some success!

And of course everyone wants to know where we can find your writing...
I’m blogging over at Why Bother? where I’m always asking myself, why bother?

Curious minds want to know-who and/or what inspires you to blog?
My main inspiration for blogging is my son, Jake. He came into this world very unexpectedly but brought with him so much joy, hope, and love that everyday I can’t help but write about him and for him. Sharing his silliness, his “boyness” and our day to day experiences has me writing constantly.

Other inspirations come from my personal experiences. From the moment I wake up to the moment I’m asleep (and sometimes when I’m sleeping!) I’m finding reasons to put my words out there to read. It’s like having my brain on paper, my thoughts typed out and my feelings expressed through words. I’m able to think, plot, write out, and then sit back and read it all. It can help me to see my situation in a different light. Plus it’s like free therapy!

Please share with us your favorite posts so far!

An Open Letter To My Obsessed Son

To My Butt

Why Can’t I See What Everyone Else Sees

A Life In Opposition

Once Upon A Playdate

What writers (and/or bloggers) do you read regularly?
Wow, this list could go on and on! I think I am currently following over 50 blogs and I try (TRY!) to comment and follow them regularly. But there are two ladies in particular that started me on this road. McMommy over at The McMommy Chronicles and Maria over at Mommy Melee. I joined Twitter and was told about both these women and their fun, touching, and beautiful writing. From there I was sucked into the blogosphere and have found so many friends.

What are your future plans for your writing/blog?
Blogging is a great outlet for me. I can write for myself, join a blog hopping meme, or write to share what’s going on in our lives. Because my writing is for me, my future plans are flexible. I can keep up my blogging just to share or to change it into something different depending on my needs. It’s a great tool and so fun to connect to others with.

I do hope that my blogging will serve as a history of the younger years of my son and I. Because mommy brain never goes away and my memory capability gets worse and worse each week, all our stories and our experiences are kept together in my blog for him.

And now, for something completely different.......

If I was an animal, I would be a wolf. They are powerful, beautiful and a little intimidating. I’ve always had a fascination with their habits and how they live in packs.

The TV show I (secretly) watch is DOCTOR WHO! And it’s nooooo secret! My boyfriend got my hooked on this great little sci-fi show that dates back to the 1960’s. I haven’t watched any of the older episodes but I’m currently in LOVE with Doctor Who #10, David Tennant. If you’ve never watched an episode, check out The Girl In The Fireplace or The Empty Child. Both of these episodes are sure to make you cry.

But if I have to tell a secret show….shhhhh….I love the drama and fakeness of all the Real Housewives shows. Just don’t tell anyone!

If you could only eat one kind of candy for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
Twix because….there are TWO in each bag. Come ‘on! Two candies? For the price of one? Love it! All that crunchy goodness mixed with the smooth caramel taste. Yum!

If you could only impart one piece of wisdom to your son what would it be?
Everything you are handed in life, you are strong enough to get through. No matter how hard, you are stronger and more capable than you think. Just remember to lean on your friends and family in the hard times and offer your shoulder or hand in return.

That is wonderful advice Katie! Thank you so much for agreeing to do my interview and for being a faithful follower, a thoughtful commenter, and an all around Fabulous bloggy friend!

Okay everyone, now is the time when you can hop over and find out even more reasons why our friend Katie is Fabulous!

5 Minutes is More Than Enough

2009-10-15T01:22:00.000-07:00

Over at Mama Kat's place they are talking about mothers, and it got me thinking. I'm not going to write about my own mother-she's a big ball of crazy, and I haven't spoken to her in four years. If I ever talk to her again it will be too soon. When I was small, my Nana (Dad's mom) was my mother. She did all of the Mommy things, better than I ever could have asked for, but she died when I was only 7. I do my best to emulate her, but unfortunately there have been many situations where her guidance was unavailable and sorely missed. I do have a step mom, a wonderful lady for whom I am very grateful, but I didn't get much time with her either. We only lived together a little more than 3 years and-while she is a terrific lady-we still don't understand much about each other and she always gave all parenting over to my dad.

And so, despite having had three female mother figures, I somehow ended up essentially motherless-and sometimes that makes me really nervous about my own parenting. Can you be a good mother if you don't really have a mother? I like to think so. Still, on days like today I wonder....

This afternoon I made a big mistake-I used the bathroom. I know, I know-I swear I'm not a rookie, but I'd been holding it for like five hours and it was an emergency. [Hey, after three kids your bladder just isn't the same.] I thought I'd be safe. Monkey appeared to be engrossed in coloring, Baby Bug was drinking her milk securely fastened into her high chair, and The Bean was asleep in her swing so I ran upstairs to enjoy the rare opportunity to pee by myself. I wasn't gone a full five minutes, but when I came downstairs it was anarchy.

As I walk into the living room, my feet slosh on the carpet. Yes, slosh. The carpet is drenched-not just a spot either-I'd say probably 6 sq feet or more of carpet, entirely soaked. It seems that Monkey had decided he was going to press the automatic water button on the fridge.....and hold it down....until there was standing water in the kitchen/living room.

This is not all he managed to do in five minutes either. He also acted as an accomplice to Baby Bug, who in this same time had managed to unfasten her safety belt (how "safe" is that?), rip off her diaper and stand up butt naked in her high chair squealing with delight. The diaper itself was no where in sight, because Monkey had decided to hide the poopy diaper under the sink in the downstairs bathroom.

While this was all happening, The Bean-presumably awakened by Baby Bug's squeals of delight-had somehow managed to put one leg over the top of her swing's tray and get stuck. She's five months old...just old enough to get herself into these positions, but not big enough to get herself out of them.

So when I come downstairs after my only solitary pee of the day I am standing in the lake that is now my living room, watching Monkey throw a poopy diaper (aka the evidence) under the bathroom sink while Baby Bug shrieks and attempts to throw her naked body out of her high chair and The Bean thrashes back and forth in her swing and cries like she means it.

And for a split second my only thought was

WHO IS RAISING THESE HOOLIGANS?!

My House-It's Where the Wild Things Are
[Picture from Max and the Wild Things, by Maurice Sendak]

Oh yeah-that would be me....and Hubby of course; my conspirator in raising this roving band of destructive monkeys. As I spring into action to get the girls safe and clothed and start sopping up the water on the floor (with Monkey's help of course) I can't help but wonder to myself-did anything like this ever happen to my Nana? Does this mean my children are out of control? Will they end up in jail/in therapy/in the circus because of this? Am I really a good mother?

As I always do when pondering these things, I came to the conclusion that I can only do my best and pray for God to give my children sense enough to overcome the flaws in my guidance. I wish there was some kind of clear cut sign, some kind of step by step check list of good mothering that I could tick off one at a time (I'm pretty sure "allow children to flood the house and dance around naked" would not be on that list).....but I guess I'll have to settle for loving my kids the best I can in the way I think is best.

I think I'm going to need to look into water proofing the house.

Wordless Wednesday:We Have Pony Tail!

2009-10-14T01:51:00.000-07:00

It took almost exactly 20 months, but our oldest baby girl has finally managed to grow enough hair to produce a pony tail. VOILA! [You may awwwwwwwww now.]

TV is Our Friend

2009-10-13T08:25:00.000-07:00

I am different from a lot of parents-I make absolutely no apologies about the fact that my kids watch a lot of TV. Sure, I've gotten the snide remarks-especially from my in laws, who had no electronics in their home until my sisters in law were 16-but I'm not sorry. Right now, as we speak, all three kids are in front of the television....and yes, this includes my 20 month old and my 5 month old (though it should be mentioned though that our 5 month old Bean is sleeping-as she should be, having been up all night).

I realize that TV is a controversial issue. Just watch this video (from Juice Box Jungle)

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Friend Makin' Monday: Halloween

2009-10-12T13:16:00.000-07:00

When it comes to Halloween, I am a bad bad mommy. These last two years I have been tied up in October-being 3 months pregnant (and throwing up like it) in October 2008, and being 5 months pregnant and passing gallstones in October 2007. Needless to say I really phoned it in on the Halloween costumes. This year was going to be different.

So far not so good.

Turns out having three kids suddenly catapulted my schedule from "active" to "insane". In the last two days the longest stretch of sleep I've gotten it two and a half hours-and when I wasn't sleeping I had far more productive things to do than worry about Halloween costumes.....like spending all my time wishing I was asleep.

This year my parents experienced a grandbaby boom-going from just our two children to five grandchildren altogether-so they've decided they want to have a Halloween party. They are not dissuaded by the fact that 3 out of 5 grandchildren are under 10 months old and 4 out of five are under 2-I suspect this is mostly their excuse to get all the kids rounded up together, ooh and aaah over their costumes, and load them full of sugar.

Back to COSTUMES! Crap! That means I actually have to pull some out of my....well, produce them somehow. While the quick fix would be to throw a sheet over them and call it good (Toga? Ghosts? Sheets are the Halloween multi-purpose tool) I know that the whole family is going to be taking a thousand pictures, and that it's the kids' first Halloween party at grandpa's, and that I really should do something special this year.

SIGH.

If I'm going to do something, I might as well make it something adorable. I like to go with book themes-where the whole family dresses up as characters from a book-and I think this year I'm either going to do Horton Hears a Who or The Wizard of Oz....whichever I can find costumes for on short notice....

What are you guys going to do for Halloween? To see what other people are doing, check out Friend Makin' Monday at aefilkins!

I Could Just Eat This Up:Noah Baby Review and Giveaway

2009-10-10T02:09:00.001-07:00

So you all remember our friend Lesley from Fab Find Friday, right? And you remember how she mentioned her fabulous mom-business Noah Baby Boutique? If you do, I'm sure you also remember how adorable every single thing she makes is.

That's why I was thrilled when she agreed to do a giveaway with me! From moment one Lesley was the pinnacle of patience and professionalism. She happily answered all of my questions and let me choose my own theme/fabric to make sure that my tote was customized exactly the way I wanted it.

The turn around time was fantastic-I placed my order on Thursday and she mailed it out on Friday! I anxiously awaited it's arrival, and despite my mail carrier's tendency to deliver everything as late as humanly possible, it arrived very promptly on Monday morning. When I opened up the package I was immediate thrilled with the packaging-it came wrapped in tissue paper, with her adorable little bird logo holding it together-when I took it out of the tissue paper I was just as excited (you know how I love pretty things!). Seriously-how adorable is this?!

If this were a gift, I could have put it in a gift box exactly as it had arrived! Still, the packaging is not the best part. Once I finished unwrapping the tote, I was just in love with it. It is so crafty-cute! Monkey was with me when I unwrapped it, and he too was totally taken with it. That's part of the reason why my pictures are not so fabulous-he couldn't let me just take a picture. He immediately wanted to take his bag and "fill it with his special treasures".

I did however manage to get an up close shot of the letters. The little zig-zag stitching is such a nice touch, don't you think? The fabric is bright and stands out, but it is well coordinated-everything is pulled together to make the tote a fabulous piece of craft work.

The design isn't the only fabulous part-this tote bag is very durable and highly functional as well. It can withstand Monkey-that alone is a great sign. This tote bag is big enough and sturdy enough to carry a ton of books without being uncomfortable. It easily swings over my shoulder as comfortably as a purse, and fits underneath the stroller for walks to the library. As a homeschooler I can tell you-this tote is going to prove invaluable!

Lesley's tote bag is kid friendly in structure and design-and we at the house of M love it love it love it.

That's why I'm so glad that Lesley and I can give one away! You can win a fabulous kid friendly, crafty cute, ultra durable tote bag customized just for you-put your kid's name on it, your family name on it, whatever is special to you, and pick from Lesley's fabulous fabric selection-really make it your own!

As always, you get one entry for simply leaving a comment on this post. However, if you want extra entries (this giveaway will probably get heated!) you can:

Follow the Noah Baby Boutique Blog
Fan the Noah Baby Boutique on Facebook
Follow my blog
Follow me on Twitter
Tweet about this contest and leave a link in the comments [1 entry per day]
Blog about this contest, including a link to both Noah Baby Boutique and this contest [+5 entries!]

If you just can't wait to have a personalized tote bag of your very own, Lesley has generously offered that during the run of this contest [From 10/10 to 10/24] she will give I've Changed My Name To Mommy readers 15% off on any personalized tote bag purchase! All you have to do is enter the code "MRSM09". While you're there check out the brand new products she just put out, including this fabulous blanket that's on The Bean's Christmas list!

Like I mentioned, this contest ends on 10/24 and the winner will be announced on 10/25-Good luck to everyone!

Pregnancy: Is Age Just A Number?

2009-10-08T01:39:00.000-07:00

Hubby and I just watched Away We Go tonight. The movie itself was so so, but it got me thinking. In the movie the main characters are 33 and expecting their first child and they are portrayed as being really young and unprepared-just kids, possibly too irresponsible to have children.

Really? At 33?

I'm probably biased, but I don't think that 33 is too young to be a parent. If you just base it on numbers alone it doesn't make much sense. The life expectancy in America is 76-which would make 38 exactly middle age...at what point did people who are 5 years shy of the mid point of their lives become too young to have children?

I think this movie is representative of a bigger cultural shift. I was browsing US Vital Statistics the other day (yes, I do that a lot-but I've warned you before that I'm a giant nerd) and it seems that in the past decade the birth rate among women under 30 has been declining at a steady pace-while the birth rate among women over 30 is rapidly increasing.

In 2003 the birth rate of women aged 30-34 jumped four percent. The birth rate of women 35-39 jumped two percent in 2003 and another two percent in 2004. At the same time the birth rate of women 18-24 has dropped 8% since 2000, and the birth rate among women ages 25-29 dropped by just under two percent between 2003 and 2005.

As I was Googling this phenomenon, I came across a surprisingly large number of message boards, websites, and support groups for women trying to conceive at 40+ years old-many of them for the first time.

It makes me wonder-why have people decided to have children so late? Why do people who do not have children at all until later decide to wait so long? Why is it so taboo to have kids in your 20s these days-after all, you're an adult by then.

It does seem that, by popular demand, 40 is the new 20 and 20 year olds are treated like children-why is that I wonder?

Obviously there are no magical, defined answers to my questions. Everyone is going to have different opinions-but I think I'm still forming mine. So tell me......

What do you think is the perfect age to have children and why? Why do you think society has decided that "40 is the new 20"?

Wordless Wednesday:Life Cycle of a Fit

2009-10-06T22:17:00.001-07:00

I'm Furious!!!!

Wait...What's that? (I'm still mad.)

Hey! A book!

Fit? What Fit?

Friend Makin' Monday:Hobbytown

2009-10-04T23:43:00.001-07:00

It is time once again for Friend Makin' Mondays (courtesy of Amber at aefilkins). Hello, everyone! This week's topic is:

What are your hobbies? What do you wish that you knew how to do?

Hmmmmm....hobbies.....hmmmmmm......does sleep count? I think it should count.

Blogging! Blogging's a hobby right? Although I don't know if 'hobby' really does blogging justice-my blog is like my fourth kid. You know, the good one that never throws fits and doesn't need to be fed or have it's butt wiped. [JK, JK-you know I love the kidlets.] I love to redesign my blog ~~every other day~~ every once in a while-that's definitely a hobby.

As far as artsy hobbies go, I'm actually pretty crafty-I can knit, crochet, quilt, cross stitch, bead, paint...none of which I really have time to do anymore of course. There are all sorts of things I'd like to add to my list of hobbies-I'd love to learn how to garden, specifically growing vegetables. I'd love to learn how to can, and how to do some basic carpentry-to build bookshelves and tables and what not.

(Picture from Encyclopedia Britannica online)

Also, someday, I'd really love to learn how to decorate our house. Like really decorate, with coordinating colors and "focal pieces" and everything. For now my house is done in the "childproof" motif-which is mainly large pieces of furniture and scattered toys-but someday when the kidlets are older I'd love to have a gorgeously decorated home....if I could just figure out how to do it!

Isn't this beautiful (well, minus the Greek/Roman bust thing on the wall)?!(Picture from Momoy.com)

Someday my house will look like that. In theory.

What are your hobbies? What are some hobbies you'd like to develop? Join in the fun with Friend Makin' Monday!