I sometimes feel frustrated in trying to find the thin line between being independent (loving myself) and being able to belong (loving others).  I get frustrated because whenever I try to break out of my shell and reach out to other people, I find my efforts are often not really needed, if not too demanding of others.

You see, whenever I think of loving others, I get into this ideal mode in my mind that says, “I care for you and you care for me.  We care for each other.  My actions aren’t only for myself and so are your actions.  In everything that we do, we take one another into consideration.”

So guess what happens when someone performs an action that does not consider the other - “me”!  I feel terribly disappointed.  Even if it’s the other way around where I’m not able to do what I think is “expected” of me, I feel bad not being able to do my part.

Feeling terrible as this, I then wonder if reaching out and trying to form relationships is really worth it.  Wouldn’t it be easier to just care for yourself?  In that way, you wouldn’t expect anything of anyone.  Also, nobody would expect anything from you.

Yet what kind of life will that be?  While it is true that you wouldn’t have troubles or misunderstandings that way, you wouldn’t feel warmth or connection as well.  You’d feel cold and empty and life will be very boring as well, a life that isn’t worth living.

In the end, it all redounds to balance, which is not so easy to achieve.  I guess I just have to carry on, learning from each mistake, each little triumph, forging relationships that may not be perfect, but which fills the heart with warmth and a lot of joy.

Listen
listen to the wind
to the earth
to the fire that growls
from beneath your feet

What do you hear?
what do you believe?
will there ever be another sound
another space
another melody

no there will never be another
you’ve heard it only once
and no more
maybe only once more
the one that you can hear over and over again
the one from within you
the sound that clung
to your very soul.

The Visionary had another troubling vision. In his dream he saw multitudes of people suffering from a terrible sickness. They cry night and day and plead for help.

Immediately, the Visionary went to the Inspirer and alerted her of his visions. To his surprise however, the Inspirer continued to attend to a woman kneeling at her feet.

“Can’t this wait?” the Visionary snapped. “We have a lot of things to do.”

“But can’t you see? This woman’s heart had just been broken!” the Inspirer exclaimed.

“That’s just one heart!” the Visionary protested. “More people will suffer if we do not hurry.”

“That is where you are wrong,” the Inspirer replied. “All evil starts when we begin to ignore one heart. The moment you become comfortable watching a single soul die, you’d have set yourself numb to all other sufferings around you. Before long, you wouldn’t even care if a whole multitude becomes stricken with death as multitudes of people consist only of individual souls. I am not here to save many. I am here to save all by saving one broken soul, one God-given soul at a time.”

Keep the vision of your home always fresh upon
your memory. Do not forget who you are, where
you came from, and what you have set forth to
accomplish. Otherwise, the people around you, who
do not know of it may convince you that the
darkness you see is all that’s ever existed.
-itakeoffthemask.com

There comes a time when you feel so awful and everything just seems to be going wrong that you just DECIDE you won’t get affected by it all anymore.

You decide that you want to finally feel good and that even if it’s chaotic all around, there will be an end to all of it.

You decide to hold on to your hope, and to stay positive.

You decide to pray, and you decide to believe that someone hears your prayers.

When you decide such things, it is then that you discover the BLESSINGS and the POWER that has been with you all along!

How about you? When was the last time you felt like enough is enough?!  When was the last time you decided to feel what you want to feel instead of feeling like a victim of circumstances or of other people’s whims?

When you finally exercise your powers, you decide that you do not have to play the victim anymore.  It is not your boss who will decide for you, not the man who broke your heart, not the economy that stole away your job.  You have the freedom and the capability.  You decide!