Blog for Parents of Late Talkers

It Takes a Village to Raise a Child

Fri, 19 Aug 2011 15:07:40 -0700

Week 11 Speech Development Tip: Involve the whole family and even friends when you are working to improve your toddler's speech. If your child has other siblings, you can do the activities with them as well. Share your child's speech activities and speech tips with others who are in contact with your child on a regular basis.

Recently I got an email from a parent who's child was not talking as quickly as his older brother had talked at this age. She was frustrated because when she asks her toddler a question, he often looks to his older sibling to answer for him. This is not an uncommon occurence. Children in the same family often learn speech at different rates. Although we don't always know the reason for speech delays, birth order often plays a role in speech development.

Younger siblings naturally look up to their older siblings. As the youngest of four, I always wanted to be like my big sisters, whether they were doing the right thing or not. If they said, "The sky is purple!" I believed it. I often took their advice over my parents.

If this sounds similar to your family, then think about involving the siblings in helping your child talk. Use the siblings to model correct speech or help introduce new signs.

However, there needs to be clear boundaries for the siblings.

If you are doing a speech activity, the older siblings can not talk for your child. During a speech activity, is a great opportunity to make use of siblings' help. Let both of your children play the game or do the activity. Your older child will probably enjoy being the teacher. You can use a prop, such as a toy microphone or "talking turtle" puppet, as a fun way to let your child know when it is his or her turn to talk. If the older sibling answers for his younger sibling, simply say, "Oops! Ashton has the microphone now. It's his turn to talk."

If your child is requesting a want or need, the older siblings can not do the talking. Here's a scenario. Caleb wants wants a ball that is out of reach. When he points to it, his sister Emily says, "Mom, he wants a ball!" You can simply answer, "It's Caleb's turn to talk...Caleb, if you want the ball, say (or sign), 'ball'." If he refuses to try, then you don't give him the ball.

So, if your child is naturally looking up to his or her sibling, don't see it as a nuisance, see it as a tool.

A Treasure Hunt in the Dark!

Wed, 25 Aug 2010 07:50:22 -0700

THE FLASHLIGHT GAME

If you and your child are adventurous or like to explore, this may be the game for you. Why not have fun while your working on expanding your child’s vocabulary or developing speech? You can be as creative as you want with this. It’s basically a treasure hunt in the dark!

Here’s how you play:

Collect objects or pictures of items that begin with the sound that you are focusing on for the week. If you’re working on the /b/ sound, you can collect balls, books, bubbles, Barney, a picture of a bike, baskets, etc... You can use the sound box ideas* from the speech calendar, for more ideas.
Put these things around the room or tape pictures of these things on the wall (you don’t have to hide them).
Turn off the lights!
Give your child a flashlight and help them search for the items.
When your child finds an object, say the name of the object and put it in the treasure chest (a decorated box, a bag, or a laundry basket). If you want you can even dress your child up as a pirate when (s)he plays the game.
Once your objects are all collected (and if your child is still interested), use your treasures as a sound box and continue to play with them and practice the beginning sounds or names of the objects.

*if you don’t know what a sound box is, please refer to my short video on the home page of my website.

The Flashlight Game is a fun twist to your sound box activity! It is also a fun way to practice the speech development tip on week 10 of your speech calendar.

Enjoy huntin’ for ye treasures Mateys!

See and Say

Sat, 21 Aug 2010 14:10:56 -0700

Week 10 Speech Development Tip: Name things in your child’s environment. Name objects (“puppy,” “bike”), use action words, (“go,” “kick”), and use descriptive words (“big,” ”funny”).

The purpose of this speech development tip is to immerse your child in language. Naming objects is a good way to introduce and expand your child’s vocabulary. Your child may not be able to imitate what you are saying at this point, but can learn the names of things in his or her environment.

This is a good tip to use when you’re reading books. Forget “reading” the book every once in awhile and just look at the pictures. Label objects, talk about what the characters in the book are doing, and describe the objects or characters in the book. My favorite books to do this with are Richard Scarry’s Busy Day Storybooks because they are filled with detailed, colorful, and often humorous pictures.

Remember to talk at your child’s speech level or just one step above your child’s level. For example if your child is not yet labeling objects, point out objects and say what they are. If your child is beginning to label objects, describe objects using two-word combinations (“big dog” or “red truck”).

Other ways you can practice this tip:

on a nature walk
while driving somewhere
at the grocery store
around the house
digging through the toy box
at the zoo

*This speech tip is introduced in week 10 of the speech calendar. For more speech tips and weekly speech activities, subscribe to my speech calendar.

Do What they Do!

Mon, 16 Aug 2010 11:08:13 -0700

Week 9 Speech Development Tip: Imitate your childʼs actions, vocalizations, or words.

Make a game out of it. Imitate your childʼs actions and encourage your child to imitate your actions or vocalizations. Describe the actions while you do it. For example, “Amber claps, now Mommy claps!”

This may be a fun game for you and your toddler, but what is the goal?

Here are a few reasons why this activity can be helpful:

Imitation teaches turn-taking. Turn-taking is a beginning stage of learning conversation skills.
It makes speech development FUN! Anytime you can make learning fun, do it! Learning games take the pressure of performing off your child. (Don’t be afraid to act silly with your kids. At this age, they still think your cool!)
It builds confidence. When you are imitating your child, letting your child be the LEADER, it makes your child feel BIG and IMPORTANT!

We want our children to follow our example. It's important for them to listen and follow our lead. But sometimes it's fun and helpful to just DO WHAT THEY DO!

Sing, Sing a Song!

Mon, 02 Aug 2010 08:56:25 -0700

Speech Development Tip 8: Sing songs with your child. Make up simple actions for your child to imitate. This is a fun, non-threatening way to encourage speech. If your child is not using words yet, you can also sing sounds to a simple tune.

Why does singing songs help your toddler talk?*
Singing songs is like learning through play. It takes the pressure off of structured learning.

The repetition in toddler songs can also help children learn the basic structure of our language and build their vocabulary.

According to Sally Goddard Blythe (Director of the Institute for Neuro-Physiological Psychology), "Putting words to music breaks them down into syllables, emphasises key consonants and slows down the sounds of speech.”

When children are imitating actions and singing they are using multiple senses. The more senses we use, the more we learn. During this fun activity, children will be using their voices to make sounds and words to rhythm. They’ll be using their ears to hear voices and sounds. They’ll be using their eyes to watch your movements. Their whole bodies will work to learn coordination and rhythm.

*I took some this information from the following websites.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/music/parents/yourchild/18mnths_3years/speech.shtml
http://www.chicagochildrensmuseum.org/learn_sing.html

If you would like to sing with your kids, but have forgotten some of the classics, this website has the lyrics to many toddler songs.
http://www.incredibleyears.com/Resources/baby-toddler_song-lyrics.pdf

If you would like to purchase some CDs with songs that can help your child’s speech develop, this website maybe beneficial to you.
http://www.songsforteaching.com/speechtherapy/
*I have not purchased these CDs myself, but listened to some of the samples and they sounded fun.

Remember: You don’t have to have a beautiful voice to sing with your kids. If you’re having fun, your kids will too!

Am I Being too Wordy?

Wed, 28 Jul 2010 11:14:48 -0700

Speech Development Tip 7: Use simple commands. Too many steps or words can overwhelm your child. For example, “Jesse, you need to go to the closet and get your shoes on before we can go to the park,” is too wordy. “Jesse, shoes on,” is less overwhelming.

Do you remember the famous line in the Charlie Brown episodes? Anytime an adult talks to the characters in the show, they hear, “whuah, whuah...whuah, whuah... whuah, whuah!” Too many words can be overwhelming. Just because we continue to talk, doesn’t mean they are continuing to listen and comprehend.

Think about learning a new language. When we are first learning a new language, we would be overwhelmed by just jumping into a full on conversation. We learn the different sounds, pay attention to the tones, learn individual words, and build up to short phrases. Our toddlers learn in a similar way. Too many words for them, especially if they have a speech delay, is not helpful. If we want our toddlers to be able to communicate appropriately, we need to slow our speech, and limit our words.

Give Them a Chance to Communicate

Wed, 14 Jul 2010 07:16:41 -0700

Speech Development Tip 6: Donʼt anticipate your
childʼs needs or wants too quickly. Allow your child the
chance to communicate needs and wants. For example,
place a favorite toy in sight, but slightly out of reach. Wait for
your child to gesture or speak before getting the toy.

As mothers we take pride in predicting our child's needs. We can decipher our child's cries...knowing what is the hungry cry, the tired cry, or the tantrum. Being able to anticipate the needs of our toddler is a great skill and helpful in our chaotic days, but are we helping our children by giving them what they need before they even ask? I remember going on a home visit for speech therapy. The toddler had three drinks lying in the living room floor - one was milk, one was juice, and one was water. Her mother was making it easier, by giving her all her options, so she wouldn't have to ask. Was it helpful for the mother's sanity? Maybe for the time being. Did it help her child's speech? Not in the least. The purpose of me telling you this is not to pass judgment on this person's parenting skills, but to give an example of how living in survival mode (what works for the moment) can be detrimental to the speech development of our children.

If you have a child with a speech delay, you can relate to the difficulty of figuring out what your child wants or needs, especially when your child is frustrated and upset. It is easier to avoid the fit and give in to them pointing and grunting. However, a child needs to know the importance of communication. If I want something, I need to communicate in an appropriate way. Throwing a fit or grunting will not get me what I want or need.

An appropriate form of communicating, for a child with delayed speech, does not mean asking in full sentences. It doesn't even mean saying "please" and "thank you." It really depends on the speech level of your child. It could mean your child uses sign language for "more" or "mine." It could mean your child makes the beginning sound /b/ for the ball that (s)he wants. If you know your child can say, "more," except her to say it...Don't settle for "uhhh."

If your child can't communicate using words, meet him where he's at and encourage him or show him the next step. For example, your child is reaching for a ball and crying. You can grab the ball and give it to him to avoid a tantrum, or you can say, "ball please" or "/b/ ball." To show him the appropriate way to communicate. You can also go a step further and withhold the ball until your child shows some attempt to communicate appropriately. My four year old, Emily, does not have any speech delays, but she does forget to ask when she wants something. She usually says, "I want a drink or I'm thirsty." My goal for her is to say, "Can I have a drink please?" So, if she says, "I'm thirsty," I say, "Can I have a drink please?" and then wait for her to say it correctly. This may seem petty to some, but I am meeting Emily at the level she is at, and going a step further.

If we want our children to improve and grow, we need to give them the opportunity. We need to challenge them one step at a time.

Wanting to avoid Restaurant Chaos?

Thu, 06 May 2010 19:00:14 -0700

Looking for new ways to entertain your kids at a restaurant?

My husband and I have 3 children. They are almost 5, 6, and 7 years old now. A couple of nights ago, we decided to go to On the Border. It was a school night and our 6 year old had homework. On the Border is pretty kid friendly, but I knew that we would have a bit of a wait before our food came. After we got home there would be no time for homework, so I decided to bring it with us. His homework was to make 2-D and 3-D shapes with marshmallows and toothpicks.

It turned out to be a great activity and saved my kids from boredom and the "squirmies". Emily, my 4 year old made a two-story house with hers. Jesse started with the basics for his homework and ended with a house and garage.

Obviously, this wouldn't be the best activity for little ones, but for preschool and elementary age kids, it worked great! After we finished our food, we ate the marshmallows for dessert (easy clean up)! My kids asked me if we could bring marshmallows and toothpicks every time we ate out.

Think Out Loud Some More

Wed, 03 Mar 2010 18:43:00 -0800

Speech Development Tip 5: Use parallel talk as your child is doing an activity.

In my last blog, I talked about self talk - talking about what you're doing, what you see, and what you hear. Self talk is one way you can give your child a positive speech environment.

Parallel talk is talking about what your son or daughter is doing. It is similar to self talk and also strengthens your child's speech environment. You can describe your son's play. "Oh, you're stacking blocks...the blocks go up,up,up...uh-oh, blocks fall down!.. " You can also describe your daughter's daily routines. "You're putting on clothes...there's your red sock...one sock on...two socks on...now your shirt...over your head...peek-a-boo...there you are!"

Remember, just like with self talk...

you don't have to expect a response. You are just giving your child examples of correct speech. You're helping your child be aware of his or her environment.
Keep it simple. Try to speak one step above your child's speech level. For example, if your child is labeling objects, talk in 2 to 3 word phrases.
Speak intelligibly, don't mumble.

When you are playing with your child, you can practice self talk and parallel talk together.
For example, if you are playing with cars, you can describe what both of you are doing. "Mommy's car is red...it goes fast...Oh, driving down the track...You're car is fast too...it's catching up...Oh no...CRASH!"

So here's your challenge...
Take time today to find two situations where you can THINK OUT LOUD! Talk about what you're doing and talk about what your child is doing.

*this speech tip is introduced in week 5 of the speech calendar.

Think Out Loud

Thu, 18 Feb 2010 06:32:38 -0800

Speech Development Tip 4: Use self talk when your child is close enough to hear.

It makes sense to say that we have to talk to our children, if we want them to learn to talk. Learning is not always a formal, structured occurance. We just need to get into the habit of not only talking to our children, but talking when our kids are around. Let me explain myself. There are two similar types of talking that can benefit your child's speech development - self talk and parallel talk.

Self talk is talking about what you're doing, what you hear, or what you see. When your child is around, practice self talk. You don't have to have your child's full attention. If your son is playing on the kitchen floor, while you are washing the dishes, talk about what you're doing. "Mommy's washing dishes...hot water...lots of bubbles..." With self talk, you don't have to get at your son's level, make sure he's listening, and explain your steps to a cleaner kitchen. You just dialogue with yourself about what you are doing.

Another good time to practice self talk is when you're driving. Take some time to turn off the radio (or hang up your cell phone) and talk about what you see or hear as you drive. "We're going on a long drive...I see trees...the branches are blowing...it's windy...I see horses...I see brown ones...I see a black horse..."

You don't have to engage them in conversation. You don't have to expect a response. You don't even have to use complete sentences. In fact short, simple phrases are best. Just talk and let your son or daughter hear you. THINK OUT LOUD!

That's enough for now, I'll talk about parallel talk in my next blog!

*This speech tip is introduced in week 4 of the speech calendar

Why Use Sign Language to Help Your Toddler Talk

Thu, 28 Jan 2010 18:55:37 -0800

Speech Development Tip 3: Introduce simple sign language to your child.

You may ask yourself, “why should I use sign language to help my toddler talk?” My answer is simple. You can’t force your child to talk, but you can teach your child to sign. You can show him a need for communication. From birth, babies make their needs known. Children will continue to make their needs or wants known, even if they can not verbally communicate them. Unfortunately, if children can not communicate their wants and needs verbally, they often become frustrated and act out. They start grabbing, crying, screaming, and having tantrums, when we are unable to understand what they are trying to communicate. Sign language is a way to reduce this frustration. Saying to your child, “use your words” or “just tell me what you want” will not make your child talk. However, taking your child’s hands in yours and showing your daughter how to sign “help” when she needs help zipping up her jacket, can prevent an unwanted tantrum!

There are many books available that teach baby sign language. Start with a few simple signs. You don't need to make your toddler fluent in sign. Remember the purpose of sign language with a child who is delayed in speech, is to reduce frustration and to show the need for communication. Unless your child is hearing impaired and will be using sign language as the primary language, you also do not have to use the exact signs. If your child is unable to sign a sign exactly, you can modify the sign. If you choose to simplify of modify a sign, make sure you are consistent, so your child is not confused.

A common fear with sign language, is the fear that my child will become dependent on sign language and not use words. As a child's speech improves the signing will naturally be replaced by words. If your child gets to the point that he is able to say a word, but is refusing and using the signs only, it is no longer a speech issue, but a behavior issue. My suggestion then would be to withold what he is asking for, until he uses his words. For example, your child now knows how to say "milk", but is insisting on signing milk without using his words. Respond by saying, "tell me milk" and wait for him to say "milk." If he refuses, you can say, "no signs, tell me milk." This, however, is not a common occurence. As I said before, signing will naturally be replaced by words when your child begins to talk.

If your toddler is a late talker, you can use basic sign language to reduce frustration and increase your toddler’s ability to communicate effectively.

Repeat, Repeat, Repeat!

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 20:12:07 -0700

Speech Development Tip 2: Repetition is key when children are learning new sounds and words. During an activity you can repeat the same sound or word again and again. If your child enjoys a particular activity, do it over and over.

When children are young and even as adults, learning comes from repetition. Concepts and ideas aren't often learned the first time around. If a child is doing something enjoyable, they will often do it over and over, even after the adult has lost interest. I must confess that my children will sometimes repeat a joke or silly sound (ie: bark like a puppy) over and over until my nerves are shot. They don't seem to tire from it.

Personal Side Note:
I used repetition with my four year old, Emily, when I was trying to get her to ask for something, rather than demand, "I want...!"
I used to say, "Start with a question" each time she said, "I want..." Later, I switched to "pardon?" At first she would just say, "I want..." louder, thinking I didn't hear her. But, she quickly learned to ask for what she wanted, when she heard me say, "pardon?" Occasionally, she even asks without my reminder. She's 4, I can't expect perfection!

When children are learning to talk, they need to hear correct speech over and over again. Keep in mind, it helps to stay at their level or one step ahead of them. Reading a college text book to your toddler repetitively will not teach your child Science 101, by the time she turns 5. It's obviously over the child's head. But, if your toddler is working on making sounds and you say "bah, bah, bah" each time you pat the ball, he is likely to catch on.* If your toddler doesn't catch on right away, don't be discouraged or feel you've failed. Persevere. Learning comes at many different rates.

* I would like to add this disclaimer. There are many different factors that are involved in delayed speech. I am not saying that all you have to do is repeat a sound continuously and your toddler will imitate you. Using repetition is one method of creating a positive speech environment for your toddler.

What are some different ways that you can use repetition to create a positive speech environment for your toddler?

As I mentioned earlier, repeat the same sound or word every time you do an action.
- Say, "bah, bah, bah" each time you pat the ball
- Say, "up, up, up" each time you stack the blocks
If you find that your child responds well to a particular activity, repeat that activity throughout the week. You can change the sound, word, or short phrase while doing the same activity.
- For example, if your child loves to pass the ball back and forth, you work on different things while doing the same activity. First you can work on signing or saying, "mine" each time you want the ball. Another time you can say, "ball" or make the /b/ sound each time you get the ball.
- If you child loves play-doh, you can pat and poke the play-doh (working on the /p/ sound). You can withhold some play-doh and work on asking for more.
Try to say the same phrase when your child does something repetitively.
- For example, if your child is spinning around in circles and falling down, use the same phrase each time he spins and falls. "Dizzy, Dizzy...Fall down!"
- Sing the same song or say the same phrase, every time your child brushes her teeth or needs to pick up his toys.

How long do you repeat an activity?

As much as possible, follow your child's lead. Continue repeating a sound or doing an activity as long as your toddler is showing interest or responding positively.
No matter how long you are repeating a sound or activity, maintain your enthusiasm!

Remember, repetition is one way to create a positive speech environment for your child.

*This speech tip is introduced in week 2 of the speech calendar.

Good Eye Contact is Key

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 14:46:23 -0700

Speech Development Tip 1: Make good eye contact when you are talking to your child.

How many times have you caught yourself hollering from across the room to get your child's attention? And how many times have you become frustrated when your child has not responded to you? I know my children are listening to me when they stop what they're doing and respond. Yes, children are able to do more than one thing at once, but if you really want them to listen and retain the information, you need to have their full attention.

So, how do you get their full attention? Hollering across the room may work sometimes, but there are kinder and more effective ways to get their attention.

The most obvious way, is to walk over to them or tap them on the shoulder.
Make sure you are at your child's level when you talk to them. If he's sitting on the floor, get down on the floor with him. If she's laying on the floor, lay beside her. Get in your child's space!
Sometimes you will need to end your toddler's activity, so his or her attention is not divided. [In the video below of Alex, I moved the blocks out of his reach, so he would ask for more, instead of grabbing for the blocks himself].
If you are playing with your toddler and want your toddler to focus on what you are saying, you can take the toy you are playing with and move it close to your mouth. If your child is paying attention to the toy, he will naturally follow his attention to your mouth. When he is looking at your mouth as you speak, he will not only hear the words, but see how your mouth forms the sounds.
You can also use your toy to tap your toddler's nose or shoulder to get full attention. [In the video below with Alex, I used the marshmallow and tapped his nose and side of his mouth to get his attention].
Make it worth your toddler's time to focus on you. Be expressive, be silly, have fun! Speech therapy or encouraging your toddler to talk, should never be boring!

*This speech tip is introduced in week 1 of the speech calendar. For more speech tips and weekly speech activities, subscribe to my speech calendar.

Introduction to my speech tip series

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 10:31:29 -0700

Now that I am settled in my new home and my children are back in school, I am making time to blog again. I'd like to start a series of blogs that summarize and expand on the speech tips that I provide weekly in my speech calendar. The purpose of these blogs is to encourage parents and care givers of toddlers who have delays in speech. Either they are not able to communicate their needs and wants, or they are new to talking.

The following video is an excellent picture of a baby who definitely has a lot to say, but is clearly not able to express herself in a way that others can understand. If you can relate to this video, then my speech tip blogs will be helpful to you! My speech calendar not only provides you with 24 speech tips, but over 200 activities you can use to help your toddler talk in way that others can understand.

Journaling Your Toddler's Journey to Talking

Tue, 19 May 2009 05:59:10 -0700

Today I was sorting through things in the office, getting some packing done for our move. I came across two old calendars. The first calendar was milestones of my oldest son, Caleb's first year of life. It was brief notes of his physical and speech development. The second calendar was when my daughter, Emily was born. When Emily was born, Jesse was almost 2 years old, and Caleb was nearly 3 years old. This calendar had more specific notes on activities that we did together, Jesse's speech development, Caleb's potty training blues, and first milestones of Emily. There were so many funny memories that I had already forgotten.

The kid's are now almost 4, 5 1/2, and 6. I realize now how quickly, we forget things that we thought we would never forget at the time. For example, less than a week before Caleb's 3rd birthday, he cut his hair and said, "Mom, I'm doing a new hair!" I didn't even remember Caleb cutting his hair. At the time, I'm sure I thought I would never forget that moment, but understandably I did - my children were 3 months, almost 2, and 3 years old. Things were definitely a blur then!

The most exciting part of reviewing these calendars, was reading and remembering my son, Jesse's speech development. I am a bit partial to speech, but it was so fun to remember how he used to say things. My favorite one was on October 25th, 2005 I wrote, "Jesse has been going around the house picking up things that are out of place, handing them to Rod or me and saying, 'deek-a-dung' (thank you)." If I hadn't written this down, I would have never remember that adorable phrase.

So, why am I telling you all this? Do you really care about the details of my family? I am sharing this with you to encourage you to write things down. It is so fun to read and reread over these. These are special memories that your kid's will enjoy hearing too. I regret not writing down more, but I'm motivated now to journal more for my children.

So, how do you get started? - There are many ways that can work for you, but here was a simple way that worked for me!

Purchase a wall calendar that was large enough to take notes on - The calendar I used was the 16 month Family Organizer.
Keep the calendar in a easily accessible place (refrigerator, nursery wall, etc.).
Put as much detail as possible - it makes reliving the moment later, that much more enjoyable.
Don't just write down what your child said, but how they said it ("deek-a-dung" for thank you).
Don't feel bad for the time you didn't write it down, just begin again when you think about it.

Remember, if it's was worth sharing with a friend or family member, it's worth writing down. Don't kid yourself into thinking you'll always remember. As much as we love our children, memories get forgotten and mixed up.

In my speech calendar , there is a blank column to write down notes. When you take advantage of writing short notes down, you can look back on them and see your child's progress as he or she makes the journey to talking!

Comparing your Toddler's Speech Development with Others: Good Idea or Bad?

Tue, 12 May 2009 05:25:39 -0700

I remember a conversation with a mom who was frustrated because her son was taking way too long to potty train. He was over three years old and understandably she said, "He should be trained by now!" She was comparing her son to his peers.

It's very natural for us, as parents, to compare our children with their peers. How beneficial is this though? Although her son has not been formally diagnosed, he was typically developing about six months behind his peers. I gave her a few tips on potty training, but encouraged her to not focus on why he had not yet caught up to his peers, but on the steps to help him progress.

If you know that your child has a developmental delay, try to move your focus off comparing your child to his or her peers. Instead, focus on your child's specific progress and abilities. I know this is not the easiest thing to do. Not only do we tend to compare our children with their peers, but other people (concerned family members, close friends, etc.) also compare. My children were all considered late walkers. My oldest walked at 15 months, my next son walked at 19 months, and my daughter was almost 2 years old. I too joined the comparing game and wondered why my daughter was so slow to walk. However, a more beneficial approach would have been to focus on what things I could do to encourage her to walk. Was there something wrong with her legs? Should I consult a pediatrician? Was she just not motivated to walk? What activities could I do to help her progress?

Another example I have relates to speech. A mother asked me what suggestions I had for her child who was two and not yet talking. He had been diagnosed with a developmental delay. As I researched some on this particular developmental delay, I found that many of the children with this delay are considered late talkers, not talking until 3 or 4 years old. Does that mean sit back and do nothing until he's 3 or 4? No. But, if we stay focused on that fact that our children don't meet the expectations of others or match the abilities of their peers, we will only become frustrated, discouraged, and overwhelmed. (I'm not implying that this mother was focused on comparing him to his peers.)

So, first we deal with the fact that our child has a developmental delay and then we stop looking at everyone else and focus on our child. What are his or her current abilities? Okay, he's not talking and he doesn't seem to pay attention to me when I'm talking to him. So, my first step is to work on eye contact and simplifying my speech. Then, he's making some progress on eye contact, but I notice that he's getting more and more frustrated when I can't figure out what he wants. Now let's introduce some basic sign language to reduce some of the frustration. He may not be caught up to his peers, but is he making progress? If he's capable, our goal may be for him to catch up to his peers in the future, but that can't be our main focus now. Now we take things step by step, praising him for every move in the right direction - praising him for every attempt!

If you think your child may have a speech delay I would encourage you to consult a pediatrician and be recommended to a local speech language pathologist. In the meantime, if you are looking for ways to help her toddler progress, my speech calendar can help. The speech calendar includes weekly activities and speech tips you can use to help your toddler talk.

People may have all kinds of advise or opinions and we can drive ourselves crazy, if we focus on what other people may think. Be encouraged, persevere, and take one step at a time!

If you have questions or comments, please drop a comment below.

Tips and Video to Help Your Late Talker

Wed, 29 Apr 2009 03:19:44 -0700

The purpose of this video is to show an example of how you can use the activities in my speech calendar to help your toddler talk.

There are several things I'd like to point out in this video. This video was made at my home with my daughter (3 yrs. 9 mos) and my friend's son (2 yrs. 2 mos). As you can tell in the video, my daughter, Emily has no problem speaking her mind, and Alex is at the beginning stages of talking. His main form of communication is through gestures, but is beginning to add some words and short phrases. In the video, I was using some of the activities from week one of the speech calendar, focusing on the /m/ sound. This is a short clip from a 15 minute video of Alex and Emily.

Here are some tips to keep in mind when you are using the speech calendar with your late talker:

Have fun! Pick activities that your child will enjoy. Children learn through play.
It's okay to use "parentese" (a sing-song voice) when you are speaking with a toddler. Please keep in mind, "parentese" is not the same as baby talk. Be careful, not to mispronounce your words. I am ashamed to admit that in the video, I accidentally said, "nummy" instead of "yummy!"
Include other family members when working with your toddler. This video is an example of how to work on speech when more than one child is in the room.
Make good eye contact, so that your toddler can see and hear you speak and sign.
Show your late talker a need for communication. In this video, I was aware that Alex wanted more of Emily's pretzels. I could have just asked Emily to hand him a pretzel, but instead I showed Alex that he needed to communicate in order to get the pretzels. When you anticipate your child's needs, your child misses the opportunity to use his or her own communication skills.
Always praise your child when your child attempts to communicate with words or sign! Praise and encouragement will motivate your child to continue trying.
Make the activities fit your toddler's personality. The activities I took from the first week of the speech calendar, were to sign and say, "more" at snack time and pretend to be a cow. I didn't think Alex would feel comfortable acting like a cow with me, so I used cow puppets instead.

I want to encourage you to be patient and keep working with your child. You will see improvement.

If you have questions or comments, please drop a comment below.

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Tips to Help You Use Sign Language Effectively

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 03:22:40 -0700

So, you've decided to start using sign language to help your toddler talk. Now, where do you start? How do you get started?

Remember your goal: Your goal is most likely not to teach your toddler to be a fluent signer. Your goal may be to use basic sign language to show your child a need for communication. Your goal may be to use basic sign language to reduce frustration or to encourage your child to talk. If these are your goals, then there is no reason to teach your child a long list of signs.

I've found that some parents get so excited about teaching their child to sign that they forget their goal and go crazy with signing. Introducing too much sign language could be overwhelming for your child or just not very beneficial. Another thing I see are parents being hesitant to start signing with their child because it seems too overwhelming to remember all these signs. Sometimes baby sign books or other products are so full of signs that the task seems too big. Learning 5 to 10 basic signs would be an excellent start and may be all your child needs to get talking.

If, however, your child is older (3 to 5) and is not talking or has unintelligible speech, you may want to add to your list of signs.

Make a list of possible signs:

When you are making a list, start by thinking about the situations where your toddler gets frustrated the most. Is there frustration when she is getting dressed or when he is trying to get a toy? Are there tantrums at meal time or when your toddler is hungry? Make a list of some words that would help reduce frustration during those time. Also add favorite activities or toys that your child is attached to (ie: a favorite stuffed animal that your child sleeps with. or a favorite blankie).

Personalize your list to meet the needs of your family: If your son is a major Thomas the Tank Engine fan, then learn the sign for train. You can also make personal signs for your family members' names. It is also good to simplify signs that may be difficult for your toddler to sign. For example, I modify the sign for mine, when I work with toddlers. Mine is a two-part sign (my + n). So, when I teach toddlers to sign "mine", I substitute it for the sign "my".

Some common sign language: Here are the signs that I have used in my speech calendar:

more (week 1 of the speech calendar)
my or mine (week 1 & 11)
want (week 4)
no (week 9)
Daddy (week 10)
milk (week 11)
ball (week 13)
hungry (week 15)
drink (week 20)
Mommy (week 21)
please (week 22).

Other signs that would be helpful are: toilet, help, all done, again, and thank you.

Look up and learn the signs that you want to teach your child: I use Signing Exact English, by Gerilee Gustason and Esther Zawolkow to look up signs. You can also find many American Sign Language books and baby sign books or DVDs. If you don't want to purchase these books, you can always take your list to the library and look up the signs there.

I am currently working on a sign language resource to supplement the speech calendar. It includes all of the signs I introduce in the speech calendar plus a few bonus signs. If you have purchased the speech calendar, this will come available to you in the near future. If you would like to purchase the speech calendar and receive access to the sign language resource, click here.

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Why Use Sign Language to Help Your Toddler Talk

Tue, 17 Feb 2009 04:36:00 -0800

You may ask yourself, “why should I use sign language to help my toddler talk?” My answer is simple. You can’t force your child to talk, but you can teach your child to sign. You can show him a need for communication. From birth, babies make their needs known. Children will continue to make their needs or wants known, even if they can not verbally communicate them. Unfortunately, if children can not communicate their wants and needs verbally, they can grow frustrated and act out. They start grabbing, crying, screaming, and having tantrums, when we are unable to understand what they are trying to communicate. Sign language is a way to reduce this frustration. Saying to your child, “use your words” or “just tell me what you want” will not make your child talk. However, taking your child’s hands in yours and showing your daughter how to sign “help” when she needs help zipping up her jacket, can prevent an unwanted tantrum!

If your toddler is a late talker, you can use basic sign language to reduce frustration and increase your toddler’s ability to communicate effectively.

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Working as a Team to Help Your Child Talk

Tue, 10 Feb 2009 04:40:00 -0800

Today I wanted to work on counting with my three year old, Emily. When I got out Teddy Bears’ Counting Book, my five and six year old boys wanted to read with us. What often happens in situations like these, is the older ones take over and the younger one doesn’t have a chance to try. So, today I decided to try something new. Instead of telling my boys to find something else to do, I decided to use the same book to teach three different things. Emily is working on counting, so on each page she counted the teddy bears. Jesse (5) is beginning to read, so he read the words that I pointed to. I thought fractions would be a good challenge for Caleb (6), so on each page, I would ask him questions about fractions. For example, “What fraction of the bears are sleeping?” I was pleasantly surprised at how well it worked. They had fun and each had my focused attention.

If you have a child who is a late talker, it is important to involve the whole family in helping your child learn to talk. For example, if you are introducing sign language with your child, teach your spouse and your other child(ren) the signs as well. I think there are many advantages to involving the whole family. One advantage is the consistency that occurs. If everyone is on the same page, your child will not get confused with conflicting methods. Also, many times older siblings want to help. If your other children notice that you’re focusing a lot of attention on helping their brother or sister to talk, they’ll want to be a a part of it. It makes them feel important and special to be able to help too. Another advantage to involving the whole family, is that it makes teaching your toddler to talk, a natural part of your routine. Then, teaching your toddler to talk isn’t a special project or something that you only do 15 minutes a day. It’s a part of snack time. It’s a part of playtime. You and your family do it while going for a walk or eating a meal together.

Helping your toddler to talk isn’t just your job. It’s something your whole family can be a part of!