Gingervitis

Redheads going extinct?

2009-05-11T14:32:00.002-05:00

Will gingers naturally die off? Currently, only 4 percent of the world's population carries the red-hair gene. Research says that natural redheads everywhere will continue to dwindle until there are none left by the year 2100.

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Facebook group 'National Kick a Ginger Day' campaign prompts attacks on redheads

2009-05-10T22:32:00.004-05:00

Some members of the Facebook group “National Kick a Ginger Day” prompt them to attack redhead children. The group is currently being investigated by the police.

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Red-headed New Zealand Men Sue Over TV Commercial and Win

2009-05-10T22:25:00.001-05:00

A group of red-headed New Zealand men have succeeded in their official complaints about a television commercial they said reinforced negative stereotypes, making life difficult for people with their hair colour.

The Advertising Standards Complaints Board upheld complaints about the commercial for a brand of rum called Coruba Ginja, saying it had "indeed caused serious offence to red-headed males in particular".

The board's ruling said the advertisement showed a woman teacher enthusing about "Ginja", saying that "she likes it very much, that it is really different, popular with the ladies, and that she has a real thing for Ginja.

"The student inadvertently thinks that she is making complimentary comments about him (he has ginger hair). In his exuberance he romantically lunges towards his teacher. She reacts with shock and disdain, saying, 'Get your pale freckled hands off me!'" the board said.

Although an unspecified number of red-haired men complained, the board quoted only a 21-year-old man identified as C Irwin, who said the commercial "is mocking people like myself in a nasty fashion".

He said, "The advertisement will add to the atmosphere of denigration that currently exists in New Zealand towards red-headed males and I am sick of dealing with the repercussions of such ill-thought out humour."

Advertising agency Colenso BBDO, which made the ad for The Rum Company, said its client, "who is himself ginger-haired" approved the concept and thought the commercial was "funny and not derogatory or offensive".

But the board said the "humorous, hyperbolic, intent" did not save the commercial from being offensive, not only because of the words but "also the fact that the young male student had 'groped' the teacher in a sexual manner".

The commercial is no longer running.

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Eric Cartman suffers from Gingervitis in the "South Park" episode "Ginger Kids."

2009-05-10T22:18:00.002-05:00

South Park Season 11 Episode 9

National Ginger Awareness Day

2009-05-10T22:08:00.004-05:00

February 22nd marks National Ginger Awareness Day - a day when Gingers are celebrated and rejoiced by people of all hair color. Perhaps, the one day out of the year redheaded kids find themselves able to walk with their ginger heads held high.

National Ginger Awarenesss Day raises awareness of the little known fact that redhair is slowly becoming extinct. The recessive ginger hair gene is being bred out of modern society. February 22nd is usually celebrated with a selection of slogans on stickers such as:

Keep the Fire Burning
Be aware, Gingers are Here
Ginger Rangers
Ginger and Proud
Ginger Power

Names for Gingers

2009-05-10T22:05:00.005-05:00

Common names for redheads:

carrot top
ginger
freckle-face
fire crotch
ginger ale
volcano head
jack-o-lantern
rangas (an Australian term)

Gingervitis FAQ

2009-05-10T17:02:00.007-05:00

Frequently Asked Questions about Gingervitis and Ginger Kids:

1) What is Gingervitis?

Gingervitis is a serious hereditary disease caused by a recessive gene. It can lay dormant for years and two perfectly healthy parents can have Ginger Babies. Gingervitis affects millions of people world wide. The symptoms of gingervitis include: Red hair, pale skin, and freckles, a "Soulless" feeling. Some Ginger Kids may show symptoms such as violence and depression. Although Gingervitis is not a life threatening disease it can be very serious. There is currently no known cure and very little treatment for Gingervitis.

2) Is Gingervitis contagious?

No, Ginger Kids are born with Gingervitis. It is hereditary and cannot be contracted in any other way.

3) Are Ginger Kids dangerous?

Although some Ginger Kids may be dangerous, many others are not. Ginger Kids do have a genetic predisposition towards anger and depression, but this is caused by there appearance and often times amplified by taunting and harassment. Contrary to popular belief, many Ginger Kids live healthy, happy lives.

4) Do Ginger Kids have Souls?

Unfortunately no, Ginger Kids are born without souls. A common misconception is that you need a soul to survive. This is completely false. Ginger Kids are people just like everyone else, even if they don’t have souls. Many Ginger Kids live happy, healthy, productive lives devoid of any sort of soul.

5) If a Ginger Kid bites me what should I do?

If you have been bitten by a Ginger Kid immediately wash the wound with soap and water. If you have alcohol or peroxide apply it to the wound. Then call your local poison control for further assistance.

6) Why do Ginger kids get such a bad reputation?

Ginger Kids are commonly stereotyped because a number of famous Ginger Kids have set bad examples. Celebrities such as Carrot Top and Queen Elizabeth I give Ginger Kids a bad name. Don't be fooled, although these famous people are Gingers. A large numbers of Ginger Kids are nothing like them. Some Gingers have even protested these figures because of the harm they have done.

7) Why do people call Ginger Kids "fire crotch"? Are there crotches really on fire?

A common misconception is that Ginger Kids' crotches are actually engulfed in flames. The truth is "fire crotch" comes from the fact that Ginger Kids have red pubic hair. It is similar to the nickname "Carrot Top". See other Ginger Kid names.

Key Stats about Gingerkids:

324904 kids are born with Gingervitis a year.
10% of kids born with Gingervitis commit suicide by age 16.
30% of those infected with Gingervitis live healthy, productive, long lives.
20% of those infected with Gingervitis feel great self hatred, and attemp to bite others in hopes they will spread Gingervitis.
80% of Ginger Kids are totally unaware they are soulless.
20% of those infected with Gingervitis, know they don’t have souls and pursue a life devoted to Satanism, Paganism, and/or Politics.
95% of those infected with Gingervitis believe they are ugly contagious beasts, resulting in an extreme fear of such common things as:

Trying on clothes in public dressing rooms
Sharing food
Intercourse
Sharing blood
Kissing the opposite sex.
Having Friends

Common statistics:

15% of all people in the US are bitten by a child with Gingervitis.
12% of those bitten don't know the proper steps to take after being bitten.
63% of those people bitten require years of trauma counseling.
80% of all people in the US are unaware that kids with Gingervitis have no souls.
20% of all people in the US are aware that those with Gingervitis lack souls, and persecute them due to this.
55% of people aware of gingervitis believe it is similar to AIDS.

Remember Ginger Kids are people, too, even if they don't have souls! See South Park (Season 9 Episode 11).