I’ve posted the above picture before, but that was a long time ago. I’m going through images, trying to find form for a new edit of photographs taken throughout the years. New narratives and different ways of seeing old things.

There are a lot of new projects I want to work on, but I’m also trying to see my old pictures differently, to see where I can go from here. As my career has expanded and grown, I’ve felt stuck in a creative rut. I’ve seen too many photographers get comfortable and stagnate, their growth as an artist or creative stunted, their surroundings always similar, always reaching for the easiest image, tried and true to a fault. I don’t want that to happen to me.

Anyway, I’ve been in a contemplative mood, trying to figure out what my photographs look like from the past 10 plus years, and what they’ll look like for the next 10 plus years.

It’s been a long time.

It gets difficult to write sometimes. I get in my head about it, especially once enough time has passed. I overthink things and wonder what the meaning of it all is. I lose the point. I get distracted. And so for the past few years now, I’ve struggled with what I want this blog to be. I’ve wondered why I still want to write at all, who I am now versus 15 years ago, and who I want to become.

I’d like to be looser here, more honest. I’d like to share stories about old photographs, talk about life and what it’s like being a working creative, someone with a long career who still struggles to feel relevant in a changing industry.

Work is work, but maybe there’s a way to write more about what I love, about what motivates me, and how those things have changed over time. But the first thing will just be to write. And to add a few photographs here and there.

This is an image from a few years ago in Sydney. I’m going through things, trying to find an edit that encompasses forgotten pictures, b-roll, and photographs orphaned from other projects along the way. A mood board of missed moments. Castoffs. Alternate takes. Photographs lost and then found again. Let’s see.

My friend Rachna lives and works on one of the most beautiful pieces of land in Chiang Mai, in northern Thailand. It’s a lush, sprawling garden complex with several structures built over the years by the property’s owner. Plumeria, palms, and teak trees dot the yard, with staghorn ferns and orchids hanging from their branches, while vines and ivies creep along walls and garden floors throughout. It’s one of my favorite places in Thailand, and where I stay every time we work together.

Earlier this year, we spent a week at the complex, taking photographs for Rachna’s new Tikkiwallah collections. Similar to the work we did last year. A bit more focused this time around. We Stayed closer to home and worked with other friends in the north. It was quiet and relaxing. A perfect place and time.

It’s hard not to be impressed by the women Rachna works with. They’re talented and driven and manage to hold to many of their traditional arts while navigating the modern world. It doesn’t escape me, how lucky I’ve been in this life to experience the things I’ve experienced, to have met all of the wonderful people I’ve met over the years. I think about it often. My many great friends, and the many great things they do, in their work and in their communities. That’s all. For now.

I’ve tried to write this post for a few days now, but I’m not sure exactly what I want to say.

When you spend too much time away from a thing, it can be difficult coming back to it. You start to overthink it. You begin to wonder why you ever did the thing at all, or why you even want to do it again. You can paralyze yourself with worry and doubt.

I’ve kept this blog for well over a decade, but I don’t post nearly as often as I used to. Things change. At some point, I got bored with my photographs, and with whatever I had to say about them. I began to feel like just another voice, clamoring to be heard over all the noise. I prefer the quiet.

I still take a lot of photographs, I’m just a bit quieter about them. I’m trying to do things differently when I can, experimenting and taking more risks, but it doesn’t come as easily as it used to. There’s something to be said for youthful abandon and misplaced confidence. It’s more difficult to posture when you’re more aware of your shortcomings.

I spend a lot of time thinking about art and photography and what it means to have your own voice in a thing, and how that voice can change over time. How it becomes weathered and more comfortable with itself, but also, for me, how that comfort has inversely affected how much I want to talk about my work.

In the simplest terms, I’ve tried to be a sponge, to soak up beauty and to put that beauty back out there in whatever small and unique way I can. And maybe I don’t need to talk about anything more than that. Maybe that’s the post.

So here are a few pictures I think are beautiful and that showcase a bit of beauty in the world, from the north and south islands of New Zealand, and one or two from Australia, while I was skipping through. Let’s not make too much of it.

Just a photograph from an early morning walk in northern Oregon along the coast. A couple and their dog in the mist.