so how else to honor such an important, once in a life time event – a top 10 list of course!  you may agree and you may disagree -weigh in, share your 90210 stories.

THE TOP 10 BEST 90210 EPISODES/MOMENTS ACCORDING TO LBN:

10. VALERIE AND HER INSENSE – a list wouldn’t be complete with a little valerie malone. remember before we knew she was bad? i think there were a solid 40 minutes there when she was just a girl from buffalo. and then, she lit up her special herb – IN THE WALSH HOUSE!!

9. BRENDA AS LAVERNE – while brandon is off becoming a soap star, brenda holds down the fort at the peach pit

8. HELLO DAY – dylan and brenda get back together, emily valentine wears a leather hat, there’s singing and dancing…what a great first day of school!

7. I CHOOSE ME – ugh the episode makes me sob every time, first andrea leaves and then kelly chooses herself

6. DONNA AND DAVID DO IT – and she goes from virgin to major beverly hills slut…no judgement
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5. U4EA – steve and andrea exchanging an egg…i die

4. SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET – we learn important background on the girls, like that donna puts popcorn in her ice cream (later referenced at her bachelorette party!)

3. CAMPING TRIP – teaching the ever important lesson – booze are bad, forgetting to pack hiking boots can be deadly

1. DONNA AND DAVID GET MARRIED – dude everyone came back for the big event!  the only person they didn’t bring back was scott – and they totally should have, can you imagine a better flashback?

ps. i also bought crib bedding.  like.  woa.

ABN and i have been busy at work on prepping our lives and house for the arrival of the spawn – after all we are only 3 months away.  we’ve bought the very few essentials we plan to buy beforehand and in the next month we will have the bedroom painted.  that’s right – ABN has moved his office – his desk is now located in the sunroom/laundry room which i get is less than ideal but at least he has an office (says his wife who works from home and is relegated to the kitchen table).  i’m doing my best to do laundry when he is at work although i know once BBN arrives that will not be possible all the time.

yesterday we interviewed a pediatrician and i fell instantly in love.  she’s jewish and sarcastic and answered my questions about breastfeeding by saying “you get what you get and you don’t get upset” but then leaned in and said with knockers like mine i should be fine.

it turns out there’s a bit of a mohel shortage in san francisco (if you ware looking for a career change it’s not a bad idea).  of course we don’t know for sure that we will need a mohel but if the random women who stop me on the street are any indication, there will be bagels at my house 8 days post BBN’s arrival.  i have this vision in my head of a bearded  religious man coming to my home and taking care of business quickly and efficiently but it seems that in the bay area the trend is women who take this on as a second career.  i’m not judging (ha!) but i know what i want – and that’s not what i want.  the pediatrician shared stories of the very mohel i was looking for who came to her home three years ago for her own son’s circumcision.  unfortunately he’s now dead.  so that’s not going to work.  she suggested i call his widow and ask if she knows of anyone.  i did some online searching and found the guy who the jewish newspaper bills as his “replacement.”  he doesn’t have a beard but he’s ortho and has a penis of his own which for me is two steps in the right direction.  as a con he used to be a professional chef but as i learned yesterday, “you get what you get and you don’t get upset.”

it’s gorgeous here in SF today and i am taking full advantage by sitting on the back patio, in a purple mumu that is too short to wear in public (due to the rise in my belly).  i think pregnant looks a bit better with some sun so i’m trying to grab it where i can.  my advice for all of you who think about one day spawning – do it in SF.  while my friends are literally wilting on the east coast, i’ve spent most of my summer happily tucked into leggings and sweaters, no overheating, no sweating, no humidity.  i’ve already made a deal with ABN – i’ll live anywhere he wants to live as long as the next time we decide to do this, i can be pregnant in SF.

you’ll also be glad to know that in last couple of months since my last update, i’ve stopped consuming two bagels a day.  sure, carbs still make for one happy lady but i’ve sorta moved on to fruit as well.  put a bowl of peaches in front of me, i’ll eat the whole thing.  cut up a watermelon – i’ll down the entire thing in one sitting.  yes, there are pictures to prove it.

i guess i should tell you that the baby did start kicking – and it has been exciting, and pee inducing.  it feels like often the baby is kicking directly into my bladder.  my day goes a lot like this: kick, kick, pee.  kick, kick, pee.  again, i feel very lucky to be working from home and to never be too far away from the toilet.

now wasn’t that worth the wait?

today i have witnessed many amazing things.  first, i was watching THE TODAY SHOW, as i do every morning, and a 13 year old girl said cunt, twice.  okay truth be told i missed the live, east coast feed but when MEREDITH later apologized for the vulgar use of language, i had to investigate (what did people do before the internet?).

also i went to a coffee shop to work and there was a group there studying talmud.  this made me blissfully happy.

there was a  group of people from various small non-profits having a “professional development” meeting.  it seemed they were talking about how to build a useful board, how to recruit new members, i could go on.  but largely they were talking about how no one ever came to these meetings and how maybe they should put together a survey to find out how to get more people to participate.  i wanted to scream – ” no one is going to answer your survey.”  but instead i just smiled to myself and thanked god my non-profit days are over…for now.

i’ve been more busy than usual because i’ve taken on my hours at my secret job.  it’s a good thing really – making a little moolah (just a little), keeping my mind active, getting me off my couch for a few hours each and every day.  i enjoy the work and the fact that i can work from home (or from a coffee shop – or from LA) is basically the best thing that has ever happened to me.  and when i say best thing that ever happened to me i don’t really mean best thing ever, i just mean, it’s a nice change.  especially with this babe on the way – it’s nice to slow down a bit.  because my life before was anything but slow.

i’ve had a lot of questions in my personal life about if i quit my DREAM JOB so that i could get pregnant.  the answer is no.  i quit my job because it was not the right job for me at this point in m life.  my job wasn’t making me happy (duh) but that wasn’t totally it either.  before EDDIE got sick i had completely rationalized sticking it out one more year.  sucking it up, not crying under my desk, and not having a kid (because let me tell you – the DREAM JOB and kid were not a match made in heaven…more like THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN PURE HELL!!).  once EDDIE got sick he spelled things out for me pretty clearly – “your coworkers are border line abusive, your NANI needs you, quit your job and have a baby.”  i spent a month or so thinking it over and decided to quit – it was just a matter of when.  again, i felt like i should stick it out through the summer and then quit come august.  after all, summer was the fun part…or was it?!  there were parts of summer that were great – singing modeh ani every morning, watching asian children fall in love with shabbat, hiring a killer staff and making life long friends…but summer also sucked ass.  i don’t think i took a deep breath between april and august, i didn’t sleep, didn’t eat and i didn’t see ABN.  not a great way to prep for a baby.  so together, after a raucous new year’s eve celebration that consisted of scrabble and the lights out by 10:30, ABN and i decided together that it was time to walk away – immediately.  i hoped by leaving right away i was leaving them in a place to find a great replacement way before summer.  and i knew i would be able to begin traveling down to LA and sitting with NANI on her pink couch.  and of course it meant we could now try to get pregnant – just never imagined it could possibly happen so quickly.

so there you go, the complete story.  i feel good because i feel like i was honest with my coworkers from the beginning.  i also took care of myself which i’m not totally apt to do. and i’m heading to LA for a week on monday which would have been IMPOSSIBLE while working at the DREAM JOB.

in other news, as we were getting into bed last night i caught the last few minutes of the play-off game.  now i’m not really a professional basketball fan (go BRUINS) but the inner fan came out.  ABN had to step back.  he never knows what to do with me when i clap wildly and yell at the screen.  my future kid may not be the BIGGEST sports fan, but for basketball, the kid is covered!

in order to distract myself from my distractions i’m thinking about the following things:

1. i just read THIS post by INDIANA, one of my favorite fashion bloggers who is now pregnant as well.  when doing research for where and how i wanted this baby to be born i quickly nixed one birth center when the home page loaded on my screen and featured walls painted with placenta.  yeah – no.

2. TODDLERS IN TIARAS has got to be the most upsetting show currently on television.  these girls and their moms are absolute terrors.  i saw currently because I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS PREGNANT: ON A BOAT doesn’t premiere until next week.  (as a side note…now that i’m actually pregnant – how the hell do these women not realize they are pregnant.  the fact that my stomach has popped is a sign for sure but if i didn’t know i was pregnant all of the puking and aching and exhaustion would lead me straight to a doctor…and i don’t go to doctors).

3. have you been watching the REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NYC???  what if my face does what BETHANNY’S face did?  this keeps me up at night (this AND the gas = a lethal combination).

yesterday was a day full of laying on mattress after mattress (can you get lice from laying on mattresses at a store?) and trying to imagine myself dozing off into a peaceful sleep.  we didn’t go into this experience blind.  no, i’m married to ABN and he is in his MOST happy place when doing research (must be something about that PhD).  it doesn’t matter the subject (hawaiian vacation rentals, strollers, where we should eat dinner), he’s on it…with gusto…for hours.  not so helpful when trying to make a quick decision but he takes his work seriously and so far, he hasn’t led me astray.

we did the whole deed in only two stops and even after the first stop (which included ABN laying on each mattress for 20 minutes – research shows that this is how long it takes to find the perfect mattress) we had narrowed down our options to a winner.  we went to a second store to see if we could get a slightly better deal (ie free delivery) and found the same mattress.  after going back and forth, trying to decide if this was indeed the right mattress for us (it’s quite different from what we are used to and felt like a big decision) the sales guy said the magic words that if he had said 2 hours earlier would have made this process MUCH easier – “this is the mattress that the westin calls the HEAVENLY BED.”  and sold.

so tomorrow, at 7:30 am, our new mattress is being delivered.  this big day also marks the start of THE GREAT BN PURGE OF 2010.  that’s right, this kid is arriving in just over 5 months and while the kid itself will take up very little room, the kid’s stuff is going to be a different animal.  we are already a family with A LOT of stuff so it’s time to start to downsize.  it turns out that in addition to being a researcher, ABN is also quite sentimental and likes to hold on to everything.  we are very lucky that we have a basement and so theoretically he can keep EVERYTHING, and simply move it out of the way (he’s having a hard enough time dealing with this concept).  but i’m hoping (praying) that he decides to get rid of some of it.  i’m hoping that if i can make some progress tomorrow with my own piles, i’ll be provide the inspiration that he needs.

in addition to napping, i bought a bridesmaid’s dress six sizes bigger than my current size for CASTLE ROOMATE’S august wedding (omg, i’m gonna be huge) and ventured into my first baby store where i promptly got super overwhelmed and had to leave.  in addition i watched the two hour season finale of GREYS in approximately 10 minutes.  and then i watched THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY in depth, rewinding twice to make sure i caught every minute.

today i made my 2nd annual appearance at MAKER FAIRE and i have seen many things – many of these things i am still in the process of processing.  many of these things included goggles and brass which is apparently a THING, but a thing i’ve never heard of.  i also ate falafel and kettle corn (i think it was the kettle corn that set me over the edge…i’m feeling pukey).  to make the event even more memorable, ABN bought me a little crocheted piece of poop….really.

but really, getting back to food (because, that is what’s important), i think i’m having a craving….or at least…a strong want.  i want really good bread, toasted, with tomato and avocado and parmesan cheese.  doesn’t that sound awesome?  also, maybe some celery with cream cheese.

so i’m flying east – a mandatory trip to westport.  now that i’m knocked up my parents (and, i can admit it, me too) are acutely aware of how far away we are from one another.  when you grow up with all four or your grandparents living in spitting distance from you, 3,000 miles does seem a bit unreasonable.  i’m going so that my mom can make me a cheese souffle and my dad can feed me homemade bagels.

as any reader knows, under the best set of circumstances i’m not the best flyer and under these circumstances i’ve been a nervous wreck.  not because i’m worried about the spawn currently growing inside me.  it will be fine – i’m sure.  but i fear puke and dizziness and general discomfort.  to combat these issues i have packed enough snacks to feed a small pre-school.  sour gummy candy, honeynut cheerios, ginger snaps, prestzel rods, jelly beans, a bagel and cream cheese, taco salad, two different kinds of mints – i could go on.  when i arrived at the airport i also bought a large size FIJI water and i immediately thought of EDDIE who thought this water, coming from FIJI, was dirty water.  he wouldn’t like the fact that i’m drinking it, especially while PREGNANT.  it made me laugh out loud.

between the Dramamine and the snacks and the water and the sea-bands, so far, so good.  being able to work while aboard a flight helps too.  it’s like a typical day except my phone won’t ring.

my parents must really love me, and this spawn, because they are picking me up from JFK right in the heart of rush hour.  i think the plan is to head straight to the diner for a turkey sandwich.

i promise that this entire pregnancy is not about food – although clearly it’s playing a big role.  i’ve been having weird-ass dreams too.  like two nights ago when i dreamt that as a married, pregnant 29-year-old i had to go back to THE BIG M to finish some class that i hadn’t quite finished before.  and i had to wear a uniform.  the craziest part of the dream was that my khaki skirt from 1997 still fit.  unfortunately, just to make life SLIGHTLY more difficult, THE BIG M was in the process of deeming those skirts OUT of uniform, and only approving of the grey flannel skirt which i know longer owned.  luckily, in my dream i was still in touch with some of the girls i went to high school with and so i asked around.  oh they were willing to sell me their skirts, for $300 a piece.  thanks girls, thanks.

alright, it looks like they are almost done with beverage service and this pregnant woman has been sitting for over an hour and needs to empty her bladder.  also it’s 10:23 am and the guy in front of me has already ordered two jack and cokes.  we have 4 1/2 hours left.  AWESOME.

in an effort to not have to play catch up on three months in one blog post, ever.again. i’m back to blogging a semi-regular basis.  not only have i missed the part of my day that is filled with writing and nothing else, but i am realizing that if i don’t write it down, i might not remember and that would just be – well, sad.

while there have been a lot of foods that i’ve been staying away from: the aforementioned rice, any kind of meat (except for one insatiable craving for an in n’ out cheeseburger), cooked vegetables and jello (there was a BAD incident early on which may lead me to never eat jello again – it’s sad really) – there are a few foods that have truly gotten me through the last few weeks.

it started with honeynut cheerios.  while i kept this secret from almost everyone, fairly early on, just as the nausea started to kick in i found myself on the phone with DIDDY and while our visits are few and far between i still feel myself sharing things with this former GUCCI that i wouldn’t share with anyone else.  anyway she said that when she was pregnant the cheerios worked for her and next thing i knew i was eating them by the handful.  now they are a little too sweet for me and my “swamp mouth” but boy did they settle a stomach.

next up – ginger snaps.  ABN went ginger happy the second my tum started to turn.  he literally bought out the whole ginger aisle at whole foods – bet you didn’t know there was a ginger aisle, oh but there is.  the ginger ale, the ginger gummy bears, the ginger pieces, the ginger tea…it all made me…puke.  but those ginger snaps.  to this day i still don’t leave my house without a little ziploc baggie full of them.  just to be safe.  and ABN?  he’s been doing a great job of drinking the ginger ales…after all, he bought three different kinds.

my mom is particularly excited that i’ve found comfort in orange slices (NOTE: not orange juice.  PUKE).  apparently, that’s what she ate when she was knocked up way back when.  while the slices are good, it’s really lemon slices that i love.  the juice cuts through the swamp mouth like no other.  sure, this might lead to my teeth falling out but at this point, i’m sorta willing to take that chance.

and finally – the occasional fountain soda diet coke.  i know, i know.  keep your caffeine down to a minimum…and a minimum i have.  i’ve completely cut out the coffee – which let me tell you, is quite the fete.  but every few days, when my energy is particularly low, that fountain soda diet coke just makes everything better.  the bubbles, the taste, the buzz.  we all need a vice and this one is mine! (luckily i’m a natural red head so i don’t have to dye my hair).

i don’t know if i’d consider any of these foods that i’ve been eating cravings – more than anything they just get me through the day.

bagels on the other hand…i’d say that’s a craving.

here’s what i’ve learned in my 3 months of not blogging:

1. i’m apparently quite fertile – and if we have a daughter, i will be warning her of this family trait the second she starts high school.

2. morning sickness can last all freaking day (and night) and is like no other “sickness” i’ve ever experienced.  i mean, maybe it’s because i don’t really ever get sick but feeling on the verge of vomit 24/7 for about 7 weeks is just awful.

3. working from home is basically the best thing ever, especially while constantly on the verge of vomit

4. sucking on a lemon helps

5. sucking on a lemon may destroy your teeth

6. teeth aren’t as important as everyone seems to think – really.

7. parents cry with joy when you tell them you are knocked up – even if you’re announcement is immediately followed by a threat that you might puke in their car

8. nanis get nose bleeds

9. some parents (my mom) immediately loose their minds and start screaming “how did this happen?!  what do you mean?! how did this happen?!”  mom – do you really need me to break it down for you?

10. doctors seem to think it’s funny to plant the idea “it might be twins”, leading one (me) to obsess about the possibility of multiples for the next 5 weeks

11. after confirming that there is indeed only one babe, one (me) can move on to other obsessions like tails and horns

12. apparently there’s this thing called SWAMP MOUTH (see lemons)

13. sometimes moms will come to california just to make eggs to settle your stomach.  okay that’s a bit of an exaggeration but the eggs did help (so did the lamp chops that she made for ABN)

14. beverly hills 90210 is on from 4-6 every weekday, the perfect relief after a mandatory nap

15. sharing the news makes the nausea go away – temporarily

16. all the cute pregnant people can give you a major complex

17. blow drying your hair and putting on a little make up can help with this complex

18. a little fountain soda diet coke never hurt anyone

19. this kid is going to come out asking for a bagel with cream cheese – or two bagels with cream cheese

20. just hearing the word rice makes me gag

okay i know that sounds like a lot of bad…and the truth is ABN and i are both over the moon (and our families are over the moon and around the back to jump over it once again).  it’s just been hard to keep quiet and by hard i should also say that for a number of weeks looking at the computer screen also made me run toward the toilet.  now that this is all super official (the internet knows!) we’re just taking it all one day at a time.  no more looking back on the past three months of puke – we’re moving forward.  second trimester!  yeah baby (i crack myself up).

so stay tuned…after all, i’m blogging for two!

i’ve been feeling all kinds of icksa recently – and so instead of spending extended hours at starbucks i’ve spent a lot more time on my couch which is way less conducive to blogging.  today i forced myself out – i’m hoping that i can last two hours before the overwhelming urge to retreat takes over.

for the last two nights i’ve had these ridiculously vivid dreams that for some reason we have to do EDDIE’S funeral again.  like the first time didn’t count or something.  and there’s this big fight about who will speak and what we will say.  am i supposed to say the same thing again?  won’t people be bored?  and then last night, at the end of the funeral in my dreams – there was this big musical number complete with like 50 or 60 acrobats hanging from material from the ceiling a la PINK AT THE GRAMMYS.

what the fuck is wrong with me?

we’re back from a long weekend in chicago where we ran between friends, hotdogs, family, a wedding – with israeli dancing AND an hour and 15 minute hora AMAZING, and more friends.  there was also snow, which was just…strange.

oh and i sorta started a new project while on the plane….stay tuned

“…her latest book, Cleaving, one of the most unpleasant reading experiences I’ve ever had. Not uncomfortable, not challenging, not in-your-face, not too real. Unpleasant to read, ultimately pretty boring except when it’s irritating, and a book from which I took nothing away at all except perhaps a clarification of my own sense of what I do and don’t want to read. “

i read a lot of bad books but this one left me feeling all kinds of icksa.  on top of everything i’m a day late returning it to the library (one book i’m glad not to own) so it’s going to cost me 25 cents.  what does a girl do in this situation?  immediately pick up a new book – this time i’m reading THE HOUR IF FIRST BELIEVED – sure to be upbeat and fun – kidding.

in other news, my parents have been without MEDIA (my mom’s words not mine) since major storms hit the east coast on saturday.  being without media might possibly be my worst nightmare.  it’s hard enough to live on the west coast and be three hours late to breaking celebrity gossip (have you heard that JESSE JAMES cheated on SANDRA BULLOCK!?!).

after some time at the gym and  a quick stop at the library (i currently have 9 holds ready for pick up), it’s home to make the matzah balls for passover.  because, that’s booger is about to sneak up on us.

our weekend was spent eating – a lovely dinner with family friends in sausalito and then yesterday in napa.   we hit up three wineries, snacked on fish tacos and finished our day with dinner at AD HOC. (if you’re interested, i’ll share the menu).  the meal was out of this world (smashed fingerling potatoes are a good thing) and the price point quite comfortable.  the best part is i didn’t hurl in the car on the way home – but that’s another story for another time.

since the incident of the dress not zipping up it’s been back to the gym for me.  i struggled in making my choice.  after all, one benefit of THE JOB was the gym membership that came with it.  and there’s no great gym close to me.  so i settled for a really lame-o circuit gym down the street but at $26 a month – it has me moving and that’s probably what’s most important.

i’m reading a book about BUTCHERY and ADULTERY and it’s due back at the library on wednesday and i can’t renew it because it’s in hot demand so, BECAUSE I DON’T HAVE A KINDLE (i’m just saying) i’ve gotta get back to reading.

• we’re going to a wedding next weekend in chicago and the dress that i’ve been planning to wear for the last year plus (since i bought it for $38 with my PINEAPPLE NATION discount) doesn’t fit.  now before you get all, oh LBN, this is what happens when you quit a job and therefore no longer go to spin classes, it’s not typical dress not fitting drama.  butt, tummy, hips (ie my usual problem areas) are all a-okay.  but the boobs?  WTF?!?  there is no room for my girls (or women – in their current state).  the dress is highly structured and it was probably a tight “squeeze” under the best of circumstances.  i’m sorta assuming it’s a time of month kind of situation and that by next weekend there will be room to spare.  but just in case – i’m on the search for either some major under-armour (and new shoes, because the dress is pink champagne color – i know! – i’m thinking nude patten leather) OR a new dress.  i don’t really want a new dress (who am i?) because i love this dress.  it just needs to fit.
• i spent a good part of yesterday afternoon looking around for one of the above but apparently dresses are no longer in style because there was nothing.  and as far as full body spanx?  well it’s hard to understand if that’s going to work if you don’t bring the dress with you.  ugh.
• i love MODCLOTH but everything i want is always sold out.  this is only partially related to the search for the dress but really just a statement about life in general.
• and finally, i know i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again – DR. DREW – i heart you. (yeah, i know, totally off topic.  don’t hate).

i’ll write a rabbi update at some point but for now, i’m consumed by the size of my chest…and dr. drew.  because life is about balance.

LA as always, was a mixed bag.  so good to be with NANI, just sitting on her green velor chair while she lays on her pink couch – that permanently holds the mold of her body.  so good to force feed her chocolate cake and turkey breast and some chalky orange protein drink that is supposed to make the HUGE wound on her foot heal more quickly (it’s really awful and maybe one day i’ll go into it in more detail because when i close my eyes it’s ALL I SEE).  so good to see GRANDMA and PAPA JOE (even with a fractured knee) and D and best of all JESSICA and BABY MAX (i thanked him for coming so far to see me and he responded, “it’s cool man!”).  but hard too.  not only is NANI in serious pain (again, the foot…it’s awful) but her heart is so totally broken that it makes my heart break all over again.  i feel so lucky to be able to spend this time with her – to have made the choices that i have made in the last couple of months that make it possible to go to to LA for days at a time whenever i want.  but leaving is hard and saying goodbye sucks.

one funny story – so ROXANNA, the housekeeper/GOD is about to bring lunch into NANI on friday afternoon after a multitude of drs appointments and a quick trip to MARTIN (yes, i got a cut!).  but first she pulls me aside, she’s holding a small container of beans – black and edamame, from WHOLE FOODS.

R: i’m going to give these to your grandmother, she says.  and i’m going to say they were your idea.  that way she will eat them

LBN: okay but it will never work – my mom and i always say things were you’re idea in order to get her to do something (remember – ROXANNA = GOD).

we walk into the den, where NANI is on her couch.

NANI: (a scowl on her face) WHAT are those? (she points at the beans and sorta sticks out her tongue).

R: elizabeth told me to get them.  she said they would be good for you.

NANI: oh, well, okay (she proceeds to eat every bite – roxanna walks out of the room shaking her head – i sit there with my mouth hanging wide open in disbelief – i swear, nothing like this has ever happened before).  these are WONDERFUL – where did you ever get anything so good?

____________________________________

this week a multitude of RABBI friends have descended on SF for some conference.  i feel less anxious just knowing they are in my city.

have i mentioned my bathroom recently?  the good news – we have a door (particle board but still) to the bathroom.  the bad news?  the bolt lock on our front door fell out.  i didn’t even know that was possible.

so, in honor of turning 29 (yesterday), 29 things that you may not know:

1. the OSCARS are like the biggest night of my whole year.  I LOVE IT.  in a perfect world i start early in the day, in my pajamas.  i drink wine-coolers and munch on appetizers from TRADER JOE’S frozen food aisle.  i watch all of the red carpet (live) and call my mom at the commercials so that we can discuss who rocked it – and who failed.  i print an oscar ballot.  i talk to my tv.  and my very favorite part is the in memorium.  growing up my mom and i would sit behind tv trays and eat ribs from TONY ROMAS.  this year i’ll be in LA with NANI.  we’ll eat dinner in bed.

2. for my birthday ABN had my engagement ring remade.  it’s a really long story that you can read more about here.  but isn’t the final result gorgeous:

3. i’m actively working to reduce my caffine intake.  it’s not going so well.

4. i’m currently reading a book about jonestown.  i know.  there is something wrong with me.

5. i’m consideirng bangs.  i’ve had bangs before and i’m considering it again.  i’m just not sure if i’m ready for this kind of commitment.

6. now that i don’t have to get dressed for work everyday (i consider it a win when i remember a bra) i’ve decided to challenge myself with an outfit post once a week.  what’s an outfit post?  funny that you ask.  basically i put together an outfit and then take a photo of it and share it with all of you.  ready for the first one?  here’s what i wore to birthday dinner last night:

blaser: old navy, blouse: BR, skirt: f21, boots: ambiance, bows: f21

7. i cook some damn good brussel sprouts

8. i love my bed – it was the bed i had when i lived in LA.  it’s a super high sleigh bed and if i had my way i’d sleep in it for ever and ever.  but in my old age, i’m starting to have trouble getting up on the bed.

9. for the first time in my adult life, my job doesn’t control every decision i make

10. tonight ABN and i are beginning a new weekly ritual.  one night each week we will not turn on the tv or computer (you can probably figure out which will be of great challenge to each of us).  instaed we’ll cook dinner together (i usually do most of that before he gets home) and then read or play a game or something.  aren’t we cute?  we’ll see.

11. in an effort to continue THE GREAT APARTMENT ORGANIZATION OF 2010 i moved my jewelry to new little trays that neatly stack on top of one another.  it’s totally great.  i want to put everything in my life into little compartments.

12. our bathroom is in the middle of a rehab.  it started this morning and it is supposed to wrap up tomorrow.  we currently have no shower and no sink.  the toilet works so i shouldn’t complain.  but most likely i’ll smell tomorrow – just a bit.

13. i get anxious when we’ve had a netflix for over a week.

14. even though i blog several times a week – i often say that i’m not actively writing because i’m not producing anything real

15. one day i want to write something real

16. losing EDDIE has been more painful than i ever could have imagined.  i find myself thinking about him many times a day.  all i want is for him to answer the phone and say, “oh, it’s the queen of the north”

17. i’m overwhelmed by the amount of food in my refridgerator, but maybe ABN can eat it all when i’m in LA this weekend

18. i still want gray boots

19. i save links from decorating websites.  like, hundreds of them.  i have no idea if i’ll ever do anything with them

20. i check PEOPLE.COM like 10 times a day.  sunday is my least favorite day of the week because usually the website isn’t updated

21. i want to be friends with JILL ZARIN

22. if i need a nail file and can’t get to one, i’m incapable of focusing on anything else (which is the current situation)

23. i’m hate confrontation – i’d rather just pout and stamp my foot.  lame.  i know.  it’s something i’m working on.  it’s going about as well as my efforts with caffine.

24. it has rained on 27 of 29 birthdays.  regardless of what city i live in – it rains

25. ABN thinks that i take showers that are too hot.  every time he takes a shower he has to turn down the temperature because i leave it up too high.  i know that it’s too hot but i can’t help myself.

26. i get an itchy back from my hot showers

27. i can’t fly without the newest issue of people magazine

28. THE PENGUIN.  do you have one yet?  A.MAZ.ING

29. i’m going to be 30 on my next birthday.  holy hell.

i’m spending the day catching up on the work i let pile up this weekend.  i’m eye-ing the small pile of envelopes and packages that are collecting on our doorstep for my birthday.  tomorrow, in honor of my 29th (holy shit) it will rain (as it should) and i will take myself to a chick flick in the afternoon before dinner with ABN at a place that’s been on our list since we first landed here.  then it’s time to gear up for another few days in LA and oscar viewing with NANI.

it’s no secret (to me) that i read A LOT of fashion blogs (dude, i really need to update my links!).  i find it super fascinating what people who i don’t know are wearing.  i like to see what they pair together and where they find their best finds.  so today, in honor of my fashion blogs, i’m taking a little (tiny) fashion risk of my own.  i’ve got this dress (that is like 7 times too short) that i think looks better as a skirt so i’ve thrown on a long sleeve tshirt over the top.  it’s a bit bulky (i blame the tshirt – it wasn’t my initial choice but i dribbled milk down the front of first one i threw on) but i’m loving that it’s style i sorta made up myself.  if you’re lucky – i’ll post my first outfit pic tomorrow.

stay tuned…

being moody has (apparently) been part of my M.O. since way back when.  there were definitely years in my life that others (MOM and DAD) have described as my mood years.  what does that even mean?  it means i shut down, i stomp, i pout and i whine.  good times – i know.  i think the big change between today and moods of years passed is that i’m aware, and willing to admit, that the mood has set in.  before i’d deny it until the bitter end.

so yeah – i’m in a mood and i don’t really have much else to say.

other than the fact that it’s so windy i feel like my house might take off a la WIZARD OF OZ.

i was up working early this morning – and by up and working i mean sitting at my desk in pajamas after dragging my ass out of bed at 8:55 (this is no the norm for me, don’t worry).  but i got done what i needed to get done and now i’m headed to the grocery store.  ABN’s aunt/uncle/cousins are coming to brunch tomorrow and i’m doing some prep.  i’m hoping a little LADY GAGA and GRANDMA’S CHOCOLATE CAKE will make for a better day.