ExChristian.Net -- encouraging ex-Christians

Long road out

webmdave — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:37:54 PST

Sent in by Anonymous

Image by a hundred visions and revisions via Flickr

I was born into a Christian home, my parents both having been raised in the faith, as Baptists. At the time of my birth, in the 1960's, they attended a large non-denominational evangelical church in the Northeast where I was baptized by the pastor, one of the founders of the Neo-Evangelical movement in the 1940's. Neo-Evangelicalism, while supporting fundamentalist doctrines, distanced itself from fundamentalism's anti-intellectual, anti-cultural bent. It was in this church that I was raised, up until around the time I graduated from high school.

Growing up, we always attended church on Sunday. I remember hours of boredom during Sunday morning services, not having the attention span to listen to a 45 minute to one hour-long sermon. The music was also less than inspiring with it's “old-time religion” hymns. (They have since moved on the “contemporary Christian” music.) I hated going. Despite this, during my time in both Sunday School and Youth Group, I developed both a solid understanding of the Bible and a personal faith in Jesus as my Savior.

My childhood was full of anxiety. It was not that my parents laid the guilt of their faith on thick, although there were times, but I think the constant reinforcement of Christian doctrine week-on-week, year-after-year, in Sunday School took a toll. I remember many times feeling I had been a failure. For several reasons, I was never a good student, but I attributed this laziness; the sin of sloth. The typical sexual awakening of youth I experienced filled me with shame; the sin of lust. I remember having several “come to Jesus” moments, breaking down, asking for forgiveness, feeling cleansed and renewed, only to find myself some days or weeks later wallowing in the same guilt and self-pity.

I drifted away after High School. Flunking out of college, I found a job and began my first career. Although I did not attend church regularly, I still believed in God and Christ, the indoctrination of my childhood running deep in my psyche. This time of my life was hard, having little money and relationship troubles with a girlfriend, I might have been in a position to start questioning my beliefs, however I fell in with a bunch of street preachers in the city and experienced a renewal of my faith. This lead me to quit my job and go back to college, choosing a evangelical Christian school founded by the pastor, now deceased, who had baptized me.

Still a poor student, I was again not prepared for the rigors of college life, and I spent a few years struggling academically before taking a job at the same school I was attending. I still had what I would consider a strong faith and saw everything that happened to me as God's providence. I met a nice Christian woman, and we married. After she graduated, I continued my new career at another local university, and we began a family.

I'm not exactly sure when I began to question my faith, the process of de-conversion for me was slow. Neo-Evangelicalism places some emphasis on not abandoning reason in matters of faith, and I think that provided me with an opportunity to question my beliefs that I might not have had if I had been brought up in a more fundamentalist denomination. Sometime over the past four years, I began to question what I believed and why I believed. One of the major catalysts for this was the attitudes of my fellow church goers towards the gay and lesbian community. My work put me in contact with a large number of gay people who weren't the degenerates that they were made out to be by my fellow churchgoers. I couldn't reconcile what my church proclaimed as the official doctrine on the matter with what I believed was the message of the gospels. As a result, on Sunday mornings, I left my wife and family to attend services at a more liberal church. I made no big deal about this. Few people knew, at the time, and they believed it was more for reasons of worship style than doctrine.

My experience as a liberal Christian allowed me to explore further and deeper what I believed. I read the Bible. Of course, I had read it before, but this time I read with a critical eye. I explored alternative viewpoints as to the origin of scripture and its meaning. One watershed weekend, around two years ago, I read Robert M. Price's, The Reason Driven Life. By the time I finished and put the book down, I knew I no longer believed.

I have mixed emotions when I think back on my life and am equally conflicted when it comes to how I should handle the future. I am glad I had the Christian upbringing that I did from a moral perspective. My parents are good people, and treated me well despite my failings. I realize that being a good person and treating people well is not exclusive to Christianity, and I'm well aware of the hypocrisy of some believers. However, I can't help but feel that religion's codes of conduct provided me with a level set of expectations on how to treat other people and expect to be treated by them. I sure could have done without all that guilt, but mostly I regret all the time I've wasted waiting for direction from above on what I should be doing, rather than making my own way in the world.

The only one who knows that I've given up the faith is my wife. She still believes and attends church with the children. I go, on and off. I am fortunate that this has not really affected our relationship or our love for each other. She accepts me for who I am and respects what I believe. I am not sure how my parents or in-laws would react if they found out. I know at least some of them would be extremely burdened and it would change our relationship. I have no desire to cause them pain and don't intend to let them know.

My children also don't know. They have grown up a church very similar to the one I grew up in. They attend Sunday School and Youth Group. They are good kids and have a good set of friends and values. I do want them to know, someday, what I believe, but at this stage in life, I think it might only confuse them. I do try to steer them from rigid thinking and encourage them to be open minded. I think they'll turn out okay.

Thanks for letting me tell my story.

Parenting Beyond Belief

webmdave — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 18:18:36 PST

Image via Wikipedia

I have not read the actual book (Parenting Beyond Belief: On Raising Ethical, Caring Kids Without Religion), but I thought it was an apt title for my own story as a parent, because in the end, even with everything I dealt with as a child myself, I somehow managed to parent beyond belief, at least beyond belief in Evangelical Fundamentalist teachings. This also included beyond the trappings I still had to pull my own self out of as an adult too. I do not know how I did it, but I seemed to have done it.

When I was little, I made a vow to myself not to do to my children what my parents, grandparents, and other relatives did to me. This also included on the religious front too. Now of course I did not have children yet, but like every little girl I had dreams about adulthood and family. To this day, I believe I kept that promise to myself and the other day, a conversation with my older son, seemed to confirm that I did in at least one area.

When my sons were little, I did not allow anyone to take them to an Evangelical Fundamentalist church, not even their own grandmother, to her dismay. That was part of my vow and I did pretty well with that because neither knew what it was like to attend one until they were teens. They only knew from my rantings that I did not agree with the beliefs of their grandmother or any of my other relatives.

I would "censor" everything my mother gave them that was religious, making sure it did not talk about "hellfire and damnation", before I allowed my sons free access to them. One Christmas she gave them several Children's Bible story books and saw me inspecting them. She asked, "Is what I gave them OK?" I sort of gave her a white lie and said, "No, they are fine." They were only fine in the respect that they did not preach any particular Christian doctrine, but told the stories in a manner more appealing to children. For all I knew, some Episcopalian wrote the stories to suit children, because it did not appear to be by any Evangelical author.

While I took my sons to an Episcopal Church until they had no interest in attending anymore and only to appease my mother, they had no actual interest in the stories, except for two- one a piece. My older son recently told me that he liked Samson and Delilah, only because Samson had long hair and “kicked ass” when someone cut it. I reminded him, that that did not happen until his hair grew back. My older son said, “Yeah, but he still kicked ass!” My younger son liked the story about "Joseph and the Coat of Many Colours", although I am uncertain as to why.

Regardless, my older son had no clue what it was like for me until he attended my grandmother's funeral. Up until that time, he only heard my rants on various things concerning Christianity, including in a priest's office. The funny thing was, just like myself as a young person, he wanted out of that church as fast as reasonably possible. I thought it was rather ironic, but when we got home, he said, "Mom, I am beginning to understand you."

The sermon was on "The Path of Salvation" and even my mother and aunt, who requested their minister preach on the topic, thought she was going to have an altar call during the funeral. She did not, thank goodness, because I did not want my son exposed to that, even if he was eighteen at that time. However, he felt ripped off, not because the sermon made no sense, but because he wanted to learn something about his great grandmother, who he hardly knew thanks to a few family disputes over religious stupidity. He did not learn a thing about her. Instead, what he got was some bizarre religious concept, which neither one of us can actually explain, because neither one of us understand what the hell they are talking about. We only know such a concept exists and it has to do with how one gets to heaven by following Jesus, Wesleyan style. This means being a "Perfect Christian", whatever that is.

Then the other day, we were once again talking about my mother and my teenage years, when my mother dragged me to church regularly, whether I wanted to go or not. This was after her last “born again” experience. Before that, it was very sporadic that we went to church. Even so, when we did go, I always found it a frightening experience, especially her behaviour after the first two times she was “born again”. She only got worse as I got older and my teen years were not much fun at all. Up until recent years, thanks to her forcing me to go as a teen and calling people heathens if they did not go, I worried about what other people would say about me not being there if I missed church for any reason, even as an adult. I did not want to deal with people telling me this or that all because I did not attend every time the church doors were open.

I also told my son that belief was not a choice, which it was not, and it took years for me to realize I did have a “choice”. He had no clue what I meant by that, so I explained that it was a case of "believing" whether you did or not and IF you said you did not, you caught the wrath of the adults, which I did not want to deal with. So, I said I did when I did not, just to keep them from getting angry with me. As long as you said you did, regardless if you did not, everything was fine and you did not catch hell from the adults.

This is not to say I did not believe some things about it. I did, but it was not what they believed nor did I believe it as strongly as any of them did and do. If any of us kids (my step-cousins and I) said anything that did not stick to what the adults wanted us to believe, we got the Inquisition and my mother still tries to give me the Inquisition to this day, if I say something she deems not to be Christian. Which is becoming more and more frequent and quite a challenge to deal with. There will come a day, probably soon, in which I will confirm to her, I am not a Christian, but rather a humanist and “the Inquisition” will be worse than ever, I am sure of that.

He still did not quite understand, except he remembers the anger my mother spews when we say something contradictory to her beliefs, so he too tries to avoid it. I further explained to him that every piece of information that came my way was censored, adding that we did not have the internet back then, so it was very easy to censor things. I did not get to read anything unless it met the adults' approval. My son jokingly said, "Thank God for the internet." He knew I knew he was joking, because he knows I usually go on rants that humans actually did it, but I did not that time. Instead, I proceeded to tell him about the time when I was fourteen or fifteen years old, in my room, and minding my own business as I read with great interest some information about humanism. I forgot exactly what was now, but I remember it was on humanism and when I stumbled onto humanism as an adult, it all seemed very familiar to me.

I was so intrigued by what I was reading that I did not notice my mother had walked in unannounced, until the humanist reading was suddenly snatched out of my hands. Her face was so red with anger as she shouted, "THAT'S NOT CHRISTIAN!", which she still screams to this day, if something contradicts her beliefs.

I had no idea what I had done wrong, but she walked out with MY reading material without any explanation. I never saw that particular reading material again. To this day, I have no clue what she did with it, except maybe threw it away, like she did so many other things that did not fit her dogma, including Jehovah Witness material.

When I was finished telling him about the censorship and invasion of privacy, he said, "I am so glad you did not do that to us." I agreed with him, adding that is the worst thing you can do a teenager. As a teen, I knew there was a bigger world out there than just my relatives' religious world, because I spent most of my childhood in it, but I was not allowed to learn anything about more about it. The door was slammed shut on the real world and the only thing I was to learn was their religious beliefs, the Bible, Billy Graham, and other like approved reading.

Instead of an occasional foot into the religious world, it was now a 24/7 ordeal, which made life even more miserable than just living with it only when we visited her relatives. I went from a miserably abusive world, in which we had to stay in, due to her relatives religious beliefs, to a miserable religious one after she finally left my father. While I was glad to be free of him, I was not so glad that my reading activities had suddenly become limited and I was forced to believe what they taught, rather I wanted to or not. It was not a choice, unless I wanted to face their primitive anger over it.

Music was a different story, even if they preferred I listened to Christian music. However, it was not censored as much as the reading material was. What I read was more important than the music I listened to as a teenager. I do not know why reading was more important than music, but to my relatives it was. Regardless, I still had to parrot them, if I wanted to get along with them, no matter what I thought. As long as I kept my thoughts to myself, I was fine.

However, my language was censored too. I could not say any bad words or say “God” unless I was talking about Him and in a respectful manner. I had to respect my elders, regardless of what they did to me. This included my bio-father too, for they were/are certain that God will deal with him appropriately and I should not be angry with the man, because anger is a sin.

Thus even my emotions were censored, but even my sons know that is not what the Bible says about anger. Still, any display of emotion beyond happiness or joyfulness, was a sin. I am sure if I had always grown up in that religious environment on a constant basis, my life would have been even more miserable than it was. Even worse if she had not left my abusive father and constantly enforced religion on me at the same time. However, that does not mean some of these beliefs were not imposed on me before she left him. They just were not a constant, except for the one where we were forced to stay with my abusive father due to their religious beliefs. Again, none of it was a choice. It was do or else.

Obviously, I did not take any of this crap to heart, for if I did, I would have raised my sons in a similar manner. Instead, I taught them the Bible was filled with stories and were not meant to be taken literally, there was no talk of Satan, hell, or alike in our home, and above all, I taught my sons to think for themselves, instead of blindly following others. They know the Bible is very errant and that it is filled with myths, but they are not afraid to read any of it. My sons have also been free to read anything else they want to read. If they had questions I could not answer, I would get them the appropriate reading material. Sometimes I would even take them to the appropriate person, like a doctor when they hit puberty, to answer their questions. All of this has made for some very lively discussions between my sons and me because almost no topic has ever been off limits in my home. They expressed their thoughts, even if we did not agree and sometimes I would express mine, if I felt like it.

The moment my older son said, "I am glad you did not do that to us," I felt as though I had done something right as a parent and knew that in at least one area, I managed to keep the vow I had made to myself as a child. I know I was not a perfect parent. What parent is? However, when your adult child says to you such things as, "I am starting to understand you" and "I am glad you did not do that to us", it gives you a good feeling and an acknowledgment that whatever parent you had set out to be at the start, you succeeded, at least in the one area they are referring to at the time.

In this case, with one son who claims to be “Tao Buddhist” and another who states he makes his own rules with no religious affiliation, I would say that, without any help from other non-theists, I managed to parent "Beyond Belief". I do not know how I did it, except to do the exact opposite of what my relatives did to me. My sons are now eighteen and twenty and to this day, no one has indoctrinated them into Evangelical Fundamentalism and I hope no one ever does. They are not even Christian for that matter. So, I must have done something right as a parent.

Big Butter Jesus

webmdave — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 18:21:22 PST

King of Kings (Also known as "Touchdown Jesus" or "Big Butter Jesus"), is a 62-foot-tall sculpture of Jesus just outside of Cincinnati. Jesus appears to be rising from the waters behind the amphitheater at Monroe's Solid Rock Church.

Music by Heywood Banks, the version originally broadcast on the syndicated Bob & Tom radio show.

All images except the first three reproduced with the permission of the web creationists at jeeebus (www.jeeeb.us).

Accept no imitations!

Ever Notice... ?

webmdave — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 13:54:00 PST

by Neal Stone

Image by benuski via Flickr

Ever notice that the Creator of the Universe always needs money -- money that is a monetary system created by man?

Ever notice that when one out of 100 is cured of cancer it's considered a miracle? What about the other 99?

Ever notice that Christians like to say “Christ is the Answer” followed by “No one can understand the Lord's ways?” So what's the point? Are we supposed to find the question?

Friends don't let friends convert to Christianity. Ever notice that those who reject God are “lost,” yet many Christians are still looking for God's Will?

Ever notice that Salvation is supposedly free, yet you are expected to tithe 10 percent of your GROSS income after being saved?

Ever notice that the amount of money, time and help you give to a church or religious organization is far more than it either ever give back?

Ever notice how churches preach about seeking the lost, but once you leave church no one comes knocking on your door?

Ever notice that many of the promises made by Jesus go unfulfilled? Maybe He's too busy carving His image into Cheetos?

Ever notice that even though Christians have access to the wisdom and knowledge of the Creator of the Universe, they still give canned generic answers to tough questions? Apparently, “God has his reasons” is an acceptable answer to why someone got abused as a child?

Ever notice that when someone makes a prophecy they claim to be filled with the holy Spirit, yet when the prophecy proves wrong or false they claim to be only human and made a mistake? But, still they expect you to still believe in their next prophecy!

Ever notice that when a prayer goes unanswered you are blamed for not having enough faith, even though answers to prayer are a way for God to prove himself? Jesus did it many times to prove who he was to doubters! Hmmmmmm.

Ever notice that in the Bible it says a Christian can't be harmed by poison, but if you ask a Christian to drink Drano they will refuse? They won't put their life in God's hands, but still they expect you to do it.

Ever notice that in the New Testament the characters Ananias and Sapphira were easily caught lying by the Apostle Peter because he was “filled with the holy ghost,” and yet many Christians today are deceived on a regular basis?

Ever notice that Christians preach love and compassion, but sing about war and conquest?

Ever notice that Christians look for the End Times, filled with death, destruction, and people burning in hell, and Atheists are considered evil for wanting none of that?

Remember: Friends don't let friends convert to Christianity.

Keeping the Faith

webmdave — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 13:23:16 PST

by Janus Grayden

For most of us who left religion, the schism wasn't a swift knife stroke but a slow, and oftentimes painful, process. This is especially true for those whose entire lives were completely entangled with their faith.

If you've ever had the misfortune of crossing paths with a prickly pear cactus, you know that the large, obvious spines are the least of your worries. It's always the minuscule, nearly invisible barbs that drive you insane, poking you even after you were absolutely certain that you had plucked them all out. With no malice intended, this was my deconversion experience.

When all of your friends, mentors, and close family are deeply religious, there is always more to religion than Sunday morning. The church I attended stressed an active involvement in almost daily activities. Without exaggeration, my life was completely involved in Christianity. So, when depression took a stranglehold on my life and, for years, no amount of prayer or any piece of advice slowed my downward spiral, questioning naturally followed.

However, as completely wrapped up in Christianity as I was, the existence of God and the fallibility of the majority of my faith was not up for dispute, in my mind. Instead, life took a much darker approach. God was sadistic and cruel, demanding that I pay a penance for being human in order to be worth His love. In short, a literal, well-versed knowledge of the Bible, unyielding adherence to faith and rampant depression led me to Maltheism.

If the idea that an omnipotent and omniscient being demands your suffering for appeasement sounds horrifying and utterly unhealthy, then you can appreciate what little favors faith did for me. I couldn't understand the passages about how God was supposed to be loving and kind while, at the same time, condemning almost everyone who ever has and ever will exist to eternal torment. The fact that it all seemed like the whims of a malevolent deity only served to drive me deeper into my ennui and sense of helplessness.

Therefore, when enough had finally become enough and I stopped praying and started working towards my own stability, things slowly began to improve. In the face of what I had been fed as a kid, life as an atheist didn't gravitate towards nihilism and hopelessness. I had been through that already and it was faith that held me prisoner. Truly, it was the large, obvious thorn that had wounded me.

Little bit by little bit, I sloughed off my faith and regained my sense of self-empowerment and capability. Of course, it's the small barbs that are the most persistent. Losing my faith was relatively easy. Coming to learn that faith is a wonderful thing took time and there were a great deal of obstacles.

Losing that kind of trust all at once shattered my ability to deal with people. Luckily, I was able to make friends who were patient with me as I came to know that faith isn't a monopoly held by religion. Losing my faith in a construct designed to hold me captive by my guilt and fears led me to have a renewed faith in myself and in the people I'm fortunate to be close to. Instead of centering my life around God and obediently believing that everything will fall into place around that faith, I've put my trust into being happy with the short time I'm lucky enough to have on this rock hurtling through space.

Evangelist Tony Alamo Sentenced to 175 Years for Taking Girls Across State Lines for Sex

webmdave — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:44:54 PST

Image via Wikipedia

Evangelist Tony Alamo was sentenced Friday to 175 years in prison for taking little girls as young as 9 across state lines to have sex with them.

The decision punishes him for the rest of his life for molesting children he took as “brides” in his ministry.

Alamo, 75, had denied the charges, claiming they came from a Vatican-led conspiracy against the church he led, called the Tony Alamo Christian Ministries.

During Friday’s hearing in Texarkana, Ark., some of Alamo’s victims testified about how their families were destroyed while the evangelist took over their lives.

Alamo was convicted in July on a 10-count federal indictment. U.S. District Judge Harry F. Barnes said Alamo used his status as father figure and pastor and threatened and threatened the girls with “the loss of their salvation.”

“Mr. Alamo, one day you will face a higher a greater judge than me, may he have mercy on your soul,” Barnes said.

[...more...]

Ministers from Community of Christ Church among those charged in sex case

webmdave — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:32:40 PST

The Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter-day Saints via last.fm

LEXINGTON, MO (AP) -- Authorities on Wednesday were searching a rural property in western Missouri for bodies and buried glass jars containing notes written more than 15 years ago by children who may have documented sexual abuse by five members of their own family.

Lafayette County Sheriff Kerrick Alumbaugh pleaded for the public's help, saying investigators "believe that there are other victims out there, and we believe people in the public can give us more information."

Alumbaugh said authorities believe there may be bodies buried on the property outside Bates City, which is about 30 miles east of Kansas City. He refused to say to whom any of the bodies would have belonged. The property and a nearby home is owned by a man unrelated to the case who is cooperating with authorities.

A small excavator could be seen moving across the property Wednesday. Two ambulances were parked nearby, and crews were searching a creek with metal detectors.

"There has been an indication that there are body or bodies in numerous locations," Alumbaugh said.

The five men were arrested Tuesday and are charged with several felonies, including forcible sodomy, rape with a child younger than 12 and use of a child in a sexual performance. The allegations, which include bestiality and forcing an 11-year-old to have an abortion, date from 1988 to 1995.

All five were being held in the Lafayette County jail on cash bonds ranging from $30,000 to $75,000. It was not immediately clear if they had attorneys.

Three of the five men are lay ministers in the Community of Christ church whose licenses have been suspended, church spokeswoman Linda L. Booth said.

Cpl. Bill Lowe of the Missouri State Highway Patrol said one of the alleged victims, now 26, came forward to investigators in mid-August with the abuse allegations. A probable cause statement released by the Lafayette County prosecutor's office says other relatives of the woman have come forward accusing all five men of abuse, but it's unclear whether all the relatives were claiming to be abused.

Lowe said the woman told investigators that she and the other alleged victims buried glass jars around the property, filled with messages "about what was happening to them" when they were younger.

"Those jars have that information," Lowe said.

The woman told authorities she had "suppressed many of the memories of abuse perpetrated on her" and the other alleged victims, according to the probable cause statement.

Sgt. Collin Stosberg, a spokesman for the Missouri State Highway Patrol, said adults told the children that if they wrote down bad memories and put them in a jar, "the bad memories would go away."

"That was what they were told. Write these memories down, put them in a jar and bury it and the memories would go away," Stosberg said. "It was a way for them to cope."

The probable cause statement identifies the relationship between the alleged victims and the suspects. The Associated Press, however, is not revealing that relationship to avoid identifying the alleged victims of sexual assault.

The woman who came forward claimed some of the men sexually abused her and her siblings, forced her to have sex with a dog, forced the siblings into fake marriages with relatives and forced her to watch as her brother was abused.

"She became pregnant and was made to have an abortion at age 11 1/2. She doesn't remember any sexual abuse after that date," the probable cause statement said.

The Lafayette County Sheriff's Department, the Rural Missouri Major Case Squad and the Highway Patrol were investigating, with the help of the Western Missouri Cyber Crimes Task Force.

The suspects were identified as Burrell Edward Mohler Sr., 77, of Independence, and his sons, Burrell Edward Mohler Jr., 53, also of Independence; Jared Leroy Mohler, 48, of Columbia; Roland Neil Mohler, 47, of Bates City; and David A. Mohler, 52, of Lamoni, Iowa.

Police in Columbia seized a computer and discs from Jared Mohler's home on Tuesday, police spokeswoman Jessie Haden said. Jared Mohler is a database administrator at Carfax, a company that provides vehicle history reports to prospective buyers, a coworker said. He was arrested at work.

Another suspect, David Mohler, has worked for Graceland University in Lamoni, Iowa, for 27 years and was arrested on its Independence campus.

University President John Sellars said David Mohler periodically traveled to Independence to work on Graceland's phone systems there. He described David Mohler as "a very nice person who got along well with his colleagues."

Sellars said David Mohler and his wife, Michelle, has grown children, but he did not know their ages or where they lived.

Deborah Burris, who has lived across the street from Burrell Mohler Sr. for several years, described the suspect as a friendly, helpful neighbor.

"We didn't even know he had sons. We didn't know anyone but Burrell himself," Burris said.

She said she thought Mohler lived with his wife and a daughter, but she had never seen them. He was occasionally seen walking around the neighborhood but had appeared frail lately, Burris said.

She said Mohler's house has an apartment on the north side, and there had been "quite a bit of activity there at different times."

"I had thought maybe someone was moving in or out of there," Burris said.

Booth, the church spokeswoman, said none of the Mohlers served in leadership roles in the congregations they attended "nor did they serve as volunteer youth workers, teach children or youth church school, or work with children or youth."

"The church takes seriously the allegations that have been made and suspended the priesthood licenses of three lay ministers: Burrell Mohler Sr., David Mohler and Jared Mohler," the church said in a statement.

Booth said one of the men, whom she refused to identify, had been registered to work with children but that license has been terminated.

The Community of Christ, headquartered in Independence, split from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in 1860 and was known as the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints until 2001. It has about 250,000 members worldwide.

STORY LINK

Report: Homosexuality No Factor in Abusive Priests

webmdave — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:25:34 PST

BALTIMORE (AP) -- A preliminary report commissioned by the nation's Roman Catholic bishops on the roots of the clergy sex abuse scandal found no evidence that gay priests are more likely than heterosexual clergy to molest children, the lead authors of the study said Tuesday.

The full report by researchers at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice won't be completed until the end of next year. But the authors said that their evidence to date found no data indicating that homosexuality was a predictor of abuse.

''What we are suggesting is that the idea of sexual identity be separated from the problem of sexual abuse,'' said Margaret Smith of John Jay College, in a speech to the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops. ''At this point, we do not find a connection between homosexual identity and the increased likelihood of subsequent abuse from the data that we have right now.''

The entire story can be read by clicking here.

Whose Morals Should Decide My Childbearing? -- An Open Letter to the Catholic Bishops

webmdave — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 01:18:23 PST

By Valerie Tarico

Bas relief of a massage abortion from about A.D. 1150. Image via Wikipedia

Dear Bishops –

In our struggle to get health care for all, you saw an opportunity to make sure that American women can’t afford abortions, a way to be the deciders for all of us. You look at someone like me who has had an abortion, and you see a sin. Perhaps you think that those of us who terminate pregnancies haven’t thought these things through from a moral standpoint. Or maybe we are simply less moral than you are: thoughtless, selfish, or promiscuous.

On the other side of the equation, you believe you know the Divine will. You claim a position of moral authority, confident that the God of love guides your judgment. I don’t trust that this is true. Time and again your predecessors made decisions in the name of God that in retrospect are shameful.

My abortion was a profoundly moral decision A council of Christian Bishops included texts in the Bible sanctioning sexual slavery, scorched earth policies, and human sacrifice. Catholic Bishops said that God gave kings a divine right to wealth and power. Bishops oversaw the design of exquisite implements to torture infidels and prolong their dying. The Church authorities sanctioned a convert-or- kill approach to Native Americans. They endorsed the Vietnam War. They looked the other way while thousands of children were molested by priests, confident that protecting the priesthood mattered more to God than the children’s suffering. They told uneducated Africans that God doesn’t want them using condoms. Church history should be a lesson in humility to us all.

Even so, you insist that this time you are right. You are so sure God prizes every embryo that you are willing to trade on a world with more unwanted children, more women bleeding to death, more families in poverty, more extinctions, more starvation, and more desperation all around. Not only would you make this trade, you would force it on the rest of us by making contraception and abortions illegal or financially impossible. Please understand if I’m not ready to cede my moral judgment to yours.

While I’m confessing, I might as well say that my judgment differs from yours on a number of other issues:

I believe that slavery has always been evil, no matter which sacred text endorses it.
I believe it is immoral to bring more children into this world than we can care for.
Whatever God may be, I believe that putting God’s name on human words, books and institutions is idolatry.
I don’t think that burnt offerings, substitutionary atonement and incense ever fixed anything.
I don’t believe that sex is dirty or virginity sacred.
I suspect that if I can forgive those who sin against me without making someone bleed first, any perfect god can too.
I think that torturing people is wrong, even if you do it for eternity.

I can speak only for myself, but I want you to know that my abortion was a profoundly moral decision. I chose abortion because of an infection during first trimester that causes serious fetal anomalies. My husband and I weighed the decision together. We didn’t make it lightly. In your framework, my decision was immoral. But in my ethical framework, it would have been immoral for me to go through with the pregnancy I aborted. I am ever grateful for my life-loving daughter, my abortion baby who could not be alive today had I carried that other unhealthy pregnancy to term. How many other chosen children will not be here if you get to decide for all of us?

There are few decisions that have greater moral impact than deciding whether to have children, when, and how many, and so I understand your attempts to intervene in our personal lives and political processes. By forcing your priorities on the rest of us you think you are holding us to a higher standard of holiness. I disagree.

When I was a child, I thought as a child, and I bowed to authority such as yours. But now I am a woman. It is my job, in community with those I love, to decide what it means for me to be a good parent, a wise steward, a loving partner, and true to my life calling. My decisions about child bearing play a role in each of these, and so I claim them as my own. This is a privilege and responsibility I do not relinquish to you or to anyone.

Valerie Tarico
Seattle
November 2009

Still Trying to Escape

webmdave — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 06:40:03 PST

by Ant

I am 24 years old...

I became a Christian during the early part of my junior year of high school after a close friend of mine, a neighbor, witnessed the Gospel of Jesus Christ to me incessantly over weeks spent playing basketball out in the street. Eventually, I let the jargon sink in, and decided I wanted to be a Christian. Big mistake.

After a year of being a babe in Christ, attending several different churches with everyone I knew who was a Bible thumper, I went on a seemingly innocent vacation with my father and sisters. When I arrived home a week later, I was bedridden with the flu. It was during this time that I conveniently read the chapter in Matthew about the unpardonable sin. I began questioning whether I'd committed this sin and done eternal, irreparable harm to myself. And thus began a nine-month tailspin of anxiety, sleepless nights, and unrelenting fear. I rarely found a moment of respite from this crippling dread, and, somehow, I was able to hide my inner turmoil from those around me. But I could only go on for so long.

Luckily, I moved to college during the ensuing fall, and through the beauty of new surroundings, fresh faces and the opportunity to finally forge my own path, I began to slightly drift away from my Christian faith. I still loosely followed the moral Christian codes that I'd adhered to over the last year (I didn't drink an ounce of alcohol, in fact, never have in my life, nor did I participate in any lewd and lascivious activities), but prayer and church going became non-existent. I finally regained my sanity and started living a normal life. I didn't blame Christianity for those fateful nine months, I just thought I had done my part as a Christian incorrectly, but a survival instinct helped me put my Christian beliefs on the back burner.

The good times would not last long enough. During the fall semester of my junior year, rumors began swirling that an avian flu epidemic was imminent, and like clockwork, my first though was about god and my eternal resting place should I be stricken with this disease and suffer death because of it. Without hesitation, I feared that I was destined to spend eternity in hell, so I prayed, hoping that my latest show of piety would put me back in god's good graces. Within the week, I sought out an on campus Christian Club, and as luck would have it, the leader of the organization was the son of a pastor at a local non-denominational church just a few miles from the campus.

Like a moth to the flame, I quickly became indoctrinated with their belief system, and soaked it in completely. I attended church weekly, without fail, participated in bible studies sometimes twice a week, and engaged in what was called an accountability group, whereby I and other Christians would recount our sinfulness to one and other, in a desperate measure to try and change our own human nature. Never seemed to work, but we all reveled in our sanctimonious practices. Needless to say, I was once again part of the system, and seemingly on my way to an eternity of ultimate joy and fellowship with my creator.

But the fears crept back in. Slowly at first, but eventually became as violent and tumultuous as they once were. My fears canvassed a wide range of issues. During the first few stages, the fear was mainly centered around my own belief that I was headed to hell for either not following god correctly, or because I was following the wrong god the entire time. But, that fear was always based on a contingency, a possibility, not a definite. My fate always hung in the balance, but it could be that one day I would be in heaven. The theology I had been taught (reformed Calvinism) confirmed that god had predestined many souls to be with him for all eternity, and my Christian brothers kept assuring me that I belonged to this select class of god's elect. Unfortunately, due to my intense study and insatiable thirst for knowledge, I was led to a far greater illustration of just how terrifying this "benevolent" god could be.

One day, while laying in bed, it hit me that according to my ideology and the overarching theology of most of Christendom, while it is possible for the individual to accept Christ and secure their place in heaven, the Scriptures all but ensure us that the vast majority of mankind will never experience the sweet repose of heaven, but would suffer forever, consciously and despondently in the wasteland of hell. No longer was it only fear that encompassed me, but a sort of nauseating emptiness in the most inner reaches of what I thought was my soul. I suddenly had the unenviable position of either rejecting god and accepting the terrible fate of hell pr resigning myself to a life worshiping a monster who would create millions of creatures, only to consign the vast majority to a fate that is literally unbelievable. That god could send billions of people to hell, and still demand worship was unthinkable, and it caused me more anguish than I've ever known. I had hit rock bottom.

I must point out that my thespian skills were still on full display, as I was able to feign normalcy once again for almost two years. Although I spent countless nights at bible studies and care-group meetings while deeply entrenched in these mental and psychological horrors, none of my church-mates were the wiser. It was actually quite amazing the things I did while giving nearly all of my mental acuity to rationalizing my fears and trying to convince myself that there was no way my preconceived notions of god's goodness could be that skewed; that the ultimate expression of good manifested itself by torturing feeble and fragile human beings throughout all eternity, all because his holiness, a measure to which fallible creatures could never innately live up to had been breached by our actions. No matter my attempts, I never found peace, and the maelstrem continually intensified.

Eventually, one thought began to nestle itself in alongside the constant theological debate going on in my head. The worst thought I'd ever thought, and the one thought everyone hopes will never enter their minds. I began contemplating suicide. I could not go on living like this anymore. Nothing temporal mattered to me anymore, and the vicissitudes of life seemed trivial. All I knew was the fear. The mind numbing, pulse-pounding dread that robbed me of my life for nearly three years. After about three weeks of these suicidal thoughts, I took action and began systematically detaching myself from the church (which, at the time, was basically the only life I knew; yes, I was that engrossed). All of my friends were Christians, and due to the alienation I had caused towards my family because of my holy lifestyle and damning "Good News Gospel" message, leaving these people would be to separate myself from everything and everyone. For as much as I detested their message and their god, I genuinely did, and to this day, do have an affection for them. But, for the sake of my sanity, and frankly, my life, I had to get out.

(My actual ex-filtration is a bit longer and convoluted than it appears here, but for the sake of some semblance of brevity, I'll get right to the point.)

Of course, the now ex-church-mates wouldn't let me go easily, and many of them spent the waning days of my "Christianity" pleading with me to come back, telling me that I was now a pawn of Satan and admitting that they were participating in church wide prayer meetings focused solely on my apostasy. Tears were shed and extremely long e-mails were sent (kind of like this testimonial...) from those expressing their dismay over my decision. In fact some believe so fervently in this doctrine of predestination, that they are fully expecting my eventual return to the faith. If they only knew....

It has been almost two years since my departure, and yet I still find myself consumed by this doctrine of hate and fear mongering. Although, I still have intermittent contact with those from the old church, I have found myself irreparably disconnecting myself from some of them, as I have been badgering their beliefs on open public forums in an effort to demean their belief system and maybe give them a window into the heartbreak that I've felt.

Although I no longer fear hell, nor do I fear for the fates of those around me, having had my worldview completely shattered twice over the past five years has left my psyche in shambles. I regularly slip in and out of depressed states, and have adopted an extremely cynical outlook on life, often times bordering on nihilism and stoicism. Given that I was a Christian during the formative days of my youth, and have since been a mental wreck, I've never been involved in a romantic relationship, and have only two people that I truly consider friends (one of them is as screwed up as I, although for wholly different reasons). My current personality and severe neuroses preclude me from pursuing such a relationship, whether intimate or friendly.

The suicidal thoughts have crept back in, not because of inexorable fear anymore, but because I feel that there is nothing to live for. I have a disdain for mankind now, for harboring this religion throughout our sociological evolution, and I am quickly becoming something of a misanthrope, which is diametrically opposed to my once affable and jolly nature. Oh, how long ago that was. Now, I am just bitter. My anger towards what religion has turned me into, and how it has ruined my life cannot be quelled, and every step I take in the right direction, several steps opposing it follow.

So, here I am, two years removed from the bonds of religious dogma, yet still trying to escape...

Still on the fence

webmdave — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 06:18:14 PST

by Michael

Image by Jonathan Gill via Flickr

I guess one could call me a de-converting Christian. I am still a little on the fence, but leaning towards the non-Christian side. My story is something of a mystery even to me.

I was raised in a Christian home, with Christians of various stripes and zealousness. I followed in their footsteps for the longest time, being a creationist and the like. But one day I was at a public library searching for videos on atheism for the sake of learning how to argue against it. By luck I discovered a video of a Christopher Hitchens' lecture on his book. Lets just say the surprise was mind blowing. It didn't de-convert me, obviously, but it got my mind thinking: What if there was more to what I believed, what I knew, and what I was told about? I checked out his book, and started to read it. It made me question my beliefs, particularly in regards to Creationism, and it showed what my belief system can do to me in a way I had never seen.

I soon realized that I couldn't believe in the stuff anymore. I soon had a problem though, since I had never been quite able to not wear my heart on my sleeve. It was talking to my grandmother, and I exclaimed that I wasn't sure what to believe anymore. (I found it is good policy to be a pragmatist in talking about things like this.) Well, in short, she made me question again, so I gave religion another shot, though I continued to do research. I found my new Hitchens inspired convictions to be sound. But then I found what I much later determined to be a crock of a book: Why I Believe by D. James Kennedy. It brought me back into the fold.

As I continued to research and think, I flirted with de-conversion again. This time I grew more certain in my convictions because of the fact that I thought that the bible wasn't historically accurate (again thanks to Hitchens' book). I soon became a bit aggressive about what I thought, and acted as such. It ultimately culminated in a discussion with a pastor. In the emotional state I was in (due to getting into an argument with my Grandmother of all things), the pastor was able to beat my arguments against Christianity. (The arguments wouldn't have been all that good if I had been in a less emotional state of mind, I realize in hindsight.) So, I decided to make a serious attempt at being a Christian. I started looking more at apologetics and it only reinforced the conclusion that the Bible wasn't historically inaccurate. Then I took a break from in-depth study of this and thought more about the theology of the Bible and how it worked. Let just say that I became a moderate in regards to Christianity. I was still in support of stem cell research, and I believed that people's decisions should be left to the individual.

In the fall of this year I started taking a class in the anthropological development of religion. I was curious about how religions developed. One of the things I learned is that to truly understand belief systems you have to be as completely objective as possible.

Soon I started to take a look a Christianity. I started to apply the concepts I was learning. I also got up enough guts to think about the Bible in my own way, not using the standard Christian norms. What got me where I am today is realizing that the typical apologetic argument for the Bible is sound within itself, but it leaves out too many important details. Like, what was the culture around them like? What are the other kinds of possibilities other then what is in the Bible that could have influenced the apostles behavior? Also in general concept, what could have happened that was not mentioned in the Bible to influence its conclusion? And to me, as far as I know, these questions have not been well examined by apologetics.

In many ways I have found answers. For one, the factors (cultural theological, and otherwise) that could have influenced the apostles are numerous, and easily could be something other than the Bible. I also started to examine (from an alien perspective as AC Grayling would put it) the ethics taught in the bible. I found that the moral codes particular to Christianity (not just general things like shall not murder), and realized that these are maladaptive codes of behavior that only really work in that culture well.

But still many questions remain and I would like responses.

What possible reasons could have Christians had to make a up a empty tomb story?
Why could no one find the body of Jesus?
What could explain the appearances of Jesus to the apostles?
How could have legend developed so quickly after Jesus died, that what was written in the gospels could not have been at least generally accurate?

Based on my personal research, I have concluded that Jesus existed and taught, was not well liked by the establishment and died. I welcome criticism on those points.

I guess I am caught in a contradiction right now. It would be nice to have some certainty.

How many congregations on its knees does it take to...

webmdave — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 13:11:01 PST

Sent in by Lisa

Image by star5112 via Flickr

Yesterday, one of my daughter's friends had a terrible accident. Her husband called my daughter from the hospital. And here's what happened then:

My daughter and her husband called another friend to go pick up the couple's baby from the hospital. My daughter took off to a town about an hour away to pick up her friend's mother from the airport. Her husband went to be with the friend's husband at the hospital.

Today, my daughter made cookies and nut bread to take to the hospital for those who would be staying with the friend, then she and another friend took the young woman's nephews and baby to the park and then to her house so the adult family members could stay at the hospital without worrying about the kids.

This evening, she and the other friend are making lasagna and several other freezable meals to take to the family so that when they come home to rest, they will not have to worry about food. Her husband has been providing taxi service all day to and from the hospital for family member who flew in.

All these young people who are helping out this family are atheists.

My question to the Christians lurking on this site (especially those who say good works are not necessary, only true belief is necessary to be good Christians): if you or a family member were in an accident and in intensive care, how many congregations on their knees praying for you would it take to equal a few good people doing some practical things to help your family make it through the day?

Finding God's Will

webmdave — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 08:46:24 PST

by Neal Stone

All my life as a Christian I was told to find God's will. I had no idea in the beginning what that was or how to do it. Any attempt to find out resulted in me being pushed aside so the more popular kids could find God's Will.

So for a time I fumbled around looking for his will.

As time went on I noticed some things that happened while in church.

I recall one family who son went in the back yard to play. They called him for dinner and he never came. So they went outside to find him and discovered him face down in the mud not breathing. As I recall the child died.

At the funeral and in the halls of the church I would hear that “God had his reasons” or “It was God's will and he has a purpose for this.”

Time went on. A man in our church spent every minute not at work at the church working. Sometimes he brought his wife and kids and sometimes he just went straight from work. They never went to the movies or go anywhere on vacation. All his spare time was spent at the church.

All my life as a Christian I was told to find God's will. I had no idea [...] what that was or how to do it. His wife left him for a single man in the church. He had lots of time on his hands and it wasn't spent in church. I remember the uproar it caused and how everyone rallied around the husband after his wife left him. Supporting him and say “God has a plan for you.” and “It must be what the Lord wants.” and of course being reminded he was free to spend all his time serving the Lord at the church.

I recall one family that let their son go to church. This family wasn't a church member but their kids went. One day they went rafting. All the adults were drunk and the raft was not properly inflated. They hit a rock and their oldest son, about 8 years old, went flying into the river. His body was found a few days later.

At the funeral it was reminded that “It was God's Will” and that he sometimes calls young ones home for a reason.

I recall people dying of cancer, families being divided, women living with violent abusive husbands, but it was all God's Will.

In 1997 I was living with my parents, my health was bad, my job was min. wage and a dead end, there were major problems with my family at home and my life was going nowhere. But it was ok, as long as I was doing God's will.

Is this what I was to look for in my life? This was it? This was God's Will? Constant suffering and agony is the best he can do for me?

I have found God's Will and I don't want it. Sorry God, got better things to do.

Oh look! A Cheetos shaped like Jesus....crunch!

That's me in the corner

webmdave — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 13:17:09 PST

by Jennifer

I have a vivid childhood memory from when I was perhaps eight or nine years of age. I was with my mom in our minivan. I think my younger sister was with us, but I'm not positive about that. I remember saying to my mom, "I'm scared that someday I'll reject Jesus and won't be a Christian anymore." My mother, wholesome and wonderful person that she is, told me that I'd have to be careful. "Just follow Jesus and you won't have to worry about it." I remember other times when she told me that she "worried" and "was concerned" about me, because I was intelligent. "I worry that your intelligence will lead you away from Jesus." As things stand, I suppose she had good cause for concern.

I was born into a fundamentalist Christian home. My mom was raised as a Lutheran, not one of the more liberal ones but one of the very conservative ones. My father was raised in the Assemblies of God. Somewhere along the way, my mom decided that she "wanted what they had", namely speaking in tongues. Before my birth, my parents attended AG churches for years. Beginning the year I was born, they began attending a Foursquare Gospel church, which is very similar to AG. When I was 11, we switched back to AG, because my older sister and I were involved in many of their programs with some friends who had left our Foursquare church.

I didn't do much questioning as a youngster. My child mind knew that things like parting the sea, a global flood, and a virgin birth weren't logical, but I didn't think much about it.

To protect us from the dangers of the big, bad, scary outside world, my mom began homeschooling my older sister and me when I started kindergarten. (My sister had gone to Christian school up until that point, but my parents couldn't afford for both of us to go.) Mom was a teacher by trade up until I was born, and so I did not miss out on basic knowledge, and I benefited from one-on-one instruction. The problem was that I was a painfully shy child, and keeping me home certainly did not help me break out of this mold. I believe that it has made relationships and social interaction difficult for me to this day, though I have learned how to handle it.

Keeping us at home, and restricting our social interaction to church and a Christian home school group, made it possible to indoctrinate us to the fullest extent. (I was permitted to join Girl Scouts and softball leagues, but being shy, I never tried to socialize with those girls outside meetings and practice/games.) We could not be exposed to outside ideas, so we were "safe".

I went through a great "spiritual crisis" at age 13, firmly believing that I had "committed the unforgivable sin", blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. In a rebellious moment, I had muttered under my breath that I hated him. For months, I wept and worried that I would burn forever and no forgiveness was possible. I sought out pastors for advice, and was told that nobody who cared as much as I did could have committed this sin. Nothing allayed my fears. Time finally moved it to the back of my mind, but I participated in church activities with increased fervor, in an effort to prove to God how sincere I was. From age 9-13, I had been the star of the church girls' program (Missionettes). In 6th grade I mastered Bible Quiz, where I memorized something like 536 questions and answers. At age 14, I raised money and went on a missions trip to Switzerland.

Longing to experience something of the outside world, I begged my parents to let me go to high school. Public school was out of the question. I might learn about evolution and have sex education other than abstinence - the only righteous way! (True, we did not live in a good area and the high school, with its fences and metal detectors, more closely resembled a jail than a learning institution.) They sacrificed for me to go to a Christian school, where I dutifully attended prayer group for the last 10 minutes of lunch every day. Because I had so little skill or experience in dealing with people, I was a virtual outcast my freshman year, and cried in the bathroom every day. I asked God to help me make friends, but he was deaf to my cries. I tried to tell myself that perhaps I was meant to learn a lesson from it, but I did not believe it. I was a good kid who was mocked for her shyness and awkwardness (though there were a few kind souls who occasionally reached out). What lesson did I need to learn?

Thankfully, the last three years of high school were much better. In fact, I categorize them as the best years of my life. This was due to good friends, though, not God. (Of course my friends were godly, though!) I continued to participate in youth musicals and such at church, though I felt unworthy. I still believed that everyone needed to be saved from eternal damnation, but I no longer believed that people who had a drink on occasion were awful sinners. I wondered if this meant I were turning toward a life of sin. Still, I wept when I found out that a lifelong friend of mine had become pregnant outside marriage at age 20. I was 16 at the time, and I remember crying to a friend, "People have always told me I was just like her! I wouldn't do that! Why would she do this? She was raised better!" The friend to whom I cried told me that I could mourn my other friend's lost innocence, but that God could forgive her and so must I. I did not have to follow in her footsteps. Looking back, I am astonished at how sick and twisted all this really was.

I also began to question the role of women in church during junior high and high school. I began to be angry over the treatment of women as inferiors, and was never satisfied with the pathetic explanation that we "weren't inferior, just had different roles." I remember once, around 15 or 16, listening to a sermon about how women were created to be "helpmates" and should be submissive. I sat there, clenching and unclenching my fists and taking deep breaths at how offensive and twisted and disturbing it was.

My path towards freedom from religion really came after high school. I went away for my freshman year and again was miserable (just like my first freshman year). I'd never been away from home, and I missed my family. I dutifully attended church weekly, and occasionally went to Christian groups on campus. Being exposed to other people, with other beliefs, began to open my mind. I still believed my way was the right way, but I think this is when I began to question it. After one year of homesickness, I moved back and transferred to the university in my hometown.

Towards the end of college, a "questioning" friend of mine (whom I met through my best friend from high school), was exploring Judaism. I went to synagogue with her and was intrigued. This led me on a journey of taking classes for conversion. I could see that Christianity had made a desperate attempt to twist Hebrew prophecies of the messiah so that Jesus would "fit" them, but they did a piss poor job of it. It was obvious. I met my boyfriend (now husband) shortly after college. He went away to go back to school; I found a job and followed him. This kept me from completing my conversion, which I now realize is a good thing. I would've been apostate from two faiths! LOL!

Over the years, as I read and sought knowledge, I came to the inevitable and unmistakable conclusion that there probably is no god or gods. If there is, he/she/they/it does not want to be known. He/she certainly isn't all powerful, and DEFINITELY not good or loving. I realized that the entire bible is full of contradictions that cannot be reconciled. How can this be the work of god? It obviously isn't the inerrant thing I was taught it was. More, the god of the bible is downright EVIL. He condones rape, child sacrifice, pillaging, conquering, slavery, treating women as animals and as vulgar, unclean, overly emotional, unthinking, vain, inferior possessions. It's despicable. I not only don't understand how people believe it, but I don't understand WHY anyone would want to. I'm not as familiar with other religions as Christianity and, to a lesser extent, Judaism. Yet the knowledge available to us says there is no god of any kind.

I have been chronically ill since I was 20, and it has reached a point that I'm not working because my health doesn't permit it. I could not go to graduate and law school as planned. Illness quite literally destroyed my life and dreams, and left me with little to live for.

I frequently am told that people are praying for me, but I wish their prayers would do some good. I know they won't. These well-meaning people tell me that if I'd just believe, then I could be healed. But plenty of people believe and AREN'T healed, and they just say that it "must be God's will." Sick god, if you ask me.

There are actually days that I consider going back to church. I sometimes long for the comfort of believing that, shitty as this life is, there will be something better after it. I know now that there isn't, and I find that very difficult. I cannot bear the thought of not being with my loved ones for eternity. The thought that we probably cease to exist after this life is horrific, because I love my family tremendously. Despite the religiosity, I had a happy childhood. I had everything I needed, and knew I was loved.

I am trying now to accept that there is nothing else, and that is hard, particularly because my dreams have been crushed in THIS life - the only one I have. Yet, painful as it is, I don't want to go back to false hope and false belief.

Death threats force removal of atheist billboard

webmdave — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:04:50 PST

"Don't believe in God? You're not alone." was the message on a billboard put up by the Cincinnati Coalition of Reason (Cin CoR) on Reading Road at 12th Street, one block south of Liberty Street in Cincinnati. It went up on Tuesday but by Wednesday afternoon the group was told it would have to come down again. Lamar Advertising, the company that owns the billboard, leases the land on which it stands and the landowner wanted it taken down. He (or she) had been receiving death threats. Fred Edwords, national director of the United Coalition of Reason, said, "We weren't given the landowner's name or precise details, Nor did we pursue them. It was sufficient to learn that this person had received multiple, significant threats and that Lamar would act quickly to alleviate the problem. Nothing like this has ever happened to us before."

The billboard campaign in Cincinnati is only one of ten going on nationwide this year and, while the current situation is unique, threats are not. Additionally, Atheist billboards have been vandalized recently in Colorado and Idaho. Shawn Jeffers, co-coordinator for Cin CoR, said, "Everything that has happened shows just how vital our message is. It proves our point, that bigotry against people who don't believe in a god is still very real in America. Only when we atheists, agnostics and humanists come together and go public about our views will people have a chance to learn that we too are part of the community and deserve respect... Hopefully this turn of events will cause more and more nontheistic people in Cincinnati to realize how necessary it is to get organized."

Cin CoR announced today that the sign will be moved to a new location near the Sixth Street Viaduct where it won't be subject to landowner restrictions. They also announced that new billboards will be erected in Cleveland and Columbus.

STORY LINK

A video report from WKRC Channel 12 in Cincinnati can be viewed here:

Priests Spar Over What It Means to Be Catholic

webmdave — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:40:50 PST

Image by Paul Keleher via Flickr

The leaders of the Roman Catholic Church traditionally couch even the harshest disagreements in decorous, ecclesiastical language. But it didn't take a decoder ring to figure out what Rome-based Archbishop Raymond Burke meant in a late-September address when he charged Boston Cardinal Seán O'Malley with being under the influence of Satan, "the father of lies."

Burke's broadside at O'Malley was inspired by the Cardinal's decision to permit and preside over a funeral Mass for the late Senator Ted Kennedy. And it has set the Catholic world abuzz. Even more than protests over the University of Notre Dame's decision to invite President Barack Obama to speak, disputes over the Kennedy funeral have brought into the open an argument that has been roiling within American Catholicism. The debate nominally centers on the question of how to deal with politicians who support abortion rights.

Read the entire article: Priests Spar Over What It Means to Be Catholic

One year on...

webmdave — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:24:47 PST

Sent in by Candace

Image by teddy-rised via Flickr

Hi guys, about a year ago (possibly longer, I can't really remember) I was on the verge of leaving Christianity, but still struggling a bit because of how involved I was with my ex-church (it wasn't even my church, it was my friend's church and she dragged me into it) and my lack of anything else in my life that was even vaguely fulfilling.

I posted a testimonial here titled "Looking for Answers." Well, it's been a year and I just thought I'd update you guys on what I've been up to. It's not really a testimonial as such but I didn't know where else to put it (moderator: feel free to do with this post as you wish).

Anyway, as I said, a large part of the reason I joined my friend's church, and Christianity, in the first place, was because of a lack of anything fulfilling in my life at that point. I had just left a long-term relationship that had been going nowhere and I was still trying to get over my ex. Plus, I was in the middle of a combined law degree that seemed to stretch on interminably with no end in sight. So I was in a bit of a rut and Christianity just filled the void, if only temporarily. I always knew it was only a band-aid solution and I'd have to get out and find whatever it was that fulfilled me, eventually, when I found the courage to live for myself rather than other people.

As a bit of a background, I've always been a creative person but that creative side of me has never been encouraged by my parents - in fact you could say they actively discouraged it. Once, my dad tore up a picture I drew for school because he thought I was wasting time. I didn't mention before, but I'm Asian, and my parents have this mentality that if you pursue anything creative you will starve. Hence why I did law combined with Media Arts and Production at university (I'd wanted to make films since I saw Lord of the Rings back in 2001). I hated Law but it was a trade-off so I could do Media Arts, which my parents were absolutely against me doing by itself. Law was the back-up plan. So here I was, stuck in this degree and feeling like my life had no purpose. I was absolutely sick of law and it seemed like there was light at the end of the tunnel - I was wallowing in a miserable, meaningless existence. The sad thing is, even though I was doing Media Arts, I hadn't put much effort that side of my degree because, after being discouraged from doing anything creative all these years, I didn't feel like I was talented or passionate enough to pursue a career in anything creative.

So here I was, languishing, and Christianity came along. I thought I'd give it a try since I had nothing else in my life at that point, but luckily, I was smart enough to realise that this just wasn't right for me and to get out. I still haven't told my friends yet. I hardly talk to them anymore. But it doesn't matter what they think. I think losing their friendship is worth what I gain from being free to think for myself.

So, to cut a long story short, shortly after I "quit" Christianity, I tried acting, on a whim. I was in a theatre production and I loved it. In high school I never had the confidence to even give a speech let alone act in front of an audience, but after the trauma of realising God either doesn't exist, or he doesn't give a shit, what was there to be afraid of? Death? Death was sweet mercy compared to the what the Bible promised to those who turned away from God, but since I didn't believe in the Bible anymore, what did it matter? I was relieved.

So to really cut to the chase (sorry for ranting), what am I doing now? Well, I am...

In my last semester of my degree and as far as I know I'm doing great (I worked my butt off this semester and it better pay off!)
Doing work experience for a TV production company and apparently they love me (also because I work my butt off),
I will be directing a short play next month, which will be performed at the beginning of next year as part of a theatre festival, and...
Next year I'm going to film school! (Well it's really just a postgrad degree specialising in film at my current university, but film school sounds cooler.)

So all in all, I'm very proud of myself and how far I've come. I've finally found something meaningful in my life that I wish to pursue (be it film, TV, theatre, whatever). Now that all the poisons have been leached out of my life - abusive parents (not abusive anymore, except to each other on the odd occasion but thankfully I'm out of their control now), loser ex-boyfriends and GOD - that angry, callous, neglectful tyrannical being who demands perfection from us and punishes us for NEVER BEING GOOD ENOUGH (notice a pattern here? - they are all manifestations of the same thing - the shroud of darkness that had covered my life and that had stopped me from gaining the confidence in myself to develop my full potential.)

So there you go. I don't regret the time I spent as a Christian because I think I learned something very valuable: Don't expect anything from other people and always rely on yourself. You are the most important person in your life (I don't mean that in a selfish way, I just mean you can't keep looking to others for approval and you really have to love yourself and accept yourself for who you are) and you NEED to have faith in yourself and your own abilities if you want to accomplish anything meaningful or fulfilling in your life, and to be happy.

I still sometimes question my faith in myself (who doesn't?) - every time I do something new, something I've never done before, I think, "Wow, I didn't know I was capable of that. How is it even possible?" And it scares me sometimes. But hey, as long as I'm alive, I can keep renewing my faith in myself, right? I can keep proving myself to myself. And if you fail, you simply forgive yourself and learn from your mistakes. There's nothing to be afraid of. We all know how it ends - it's how you get there that matters. Life is like walking a tight-rope - you know you can fall at any time, but you keep going. There's no safety net. That's the deal. You look Death/suffering/pain right in the face and you keep walking.

Why I am not a Muslim

webmdave — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 01:07:08 PST

(Amherst, NY) — In response to the recent tragic events at Fort Hood, Texas, the Center for Inquiry, a secularist think tank, has released a statement/editorial from Ibn Warraq, Islamic scholar and leading figure in Quranic criticism.

Warraq is a senior research fellow at the Center for Inquiry and author of five books, including Why I Am Not a Muslim and Defending the West: A Critique of Edward Said's Orientalism (both published by Prometheus Books). The statement follows below.

Denying Reality, or the Heavy Cost of Political Correctness, by Ibn Warraq

In the wake of the murder of 13 and the wounding of 38 soldiers at Fort Hood on November 5, media analysts, politicians, and other sundry experts scrambled to present the accused perpetrator of the acts, Major Nidal Malik Hasan, 39, as a victim. In so doing they served, knowingly or otherwise, as apologists for radical Islam. From CNN to the New York Times, NPR to the Washington Post, the killings were presented as a result of racism. They were attributed to fear of deployment in Afghanistan and harassment from other soldiers. Cited were Major Hasan’s supposed maladjustment to his life and his sense of not belonging, pre-traumatic stress disorder, and various personal and mental problems. All these explanations are variations on what I have called “the Root Cause Fallacy,” which has been committed time and again since the terrorist acts of September 11, 2001. The Root Cause Fallacy was designed to deflect attention away from Islam, in effect to exonerate Islam, which, we are told, is never to blame for acts of violence. On this view we must not hold a great world religion of peace responsible when individuals of that faith resort to force. We must dig deeper: the real cause is poverty, U.S. foreign policy, the Arab-Israeli conflict, Western colonialism and exploitation, marital problems of individuals, and so on. The present “psychological” interpretations in the case of Major Hasan are just the latest example of the Root Cause Fallacy at work.
The Australian tells us that the mindset of Major Hasan remains a “mystery,” yet his Jihadist intentions are there on the surface for everyone not paralyzed by political correctness to see. According to CNN (Nov. 7), on the morning of the shootings Hasan gave copies of the Koran to his neighbors. According to the Associated Press (Nov. 6), soldiers reported that Hasan shouted out “Allahu Akbar” [God is Great] – the war cry of all Jihadis – before firing off over a hundred rounds with two pistols in a center where some 300 unarmed soldiers had lined up for vaccines and eye tests. NPR informs us that Hasan was put on probation early in his postgraduate work at the Uniformed Service University of the Health Sciences in Bethesda, Md., for proselytizing about his Muslim faith with patients and colleagues. The Associated Press (Nov. 11) adds that classmates who studied with Hasan from in that postgraduate program reported Hasan making a presentation during their studies “that justified suicide bombing” and spewed “anti-American propaganda,” denouncing the war on terror as “a war against Islam.” Classmate Val Finnell and another student complained about Hasan, shocked that someone with “this type of vile ideology” would be allowed to wear an officer’s uniform. But, importantly, no one filed a formal complaint about Hasan’s views and comments for fear of appearing discriminatory — in other words, out of political correctness. According to The Telegraph (Nov. 6), Army colleagues reported that Major Hasan had condemned U.S. foreign policy, that he clearly declared that Muslims had the right to rise up and attack Americans, that he expressed happiness when a U.S. soldier was killed in an attack on a military recruitment center in Arkansas in June, and that he said people should strap bombs on themselves and go to Times Square. It has been widely reported that Major Hasan attended the Dar al-Hijrah mosque in Virginia Falls during the time that Anwar al-Awlaki, a Yemen-based al-Qaeda preacher with extensive terrorist connections, was its main preacher. Awlaki even praised Major Hasan as a hero on November 9, four days after the Fort Hood attacks. The Times of London revealed (Nov. 10) that Major Hasan had been in direct correspondence with Awlaki, in connection with which Hasan had already been under investigation by the F.B.I. Almost every news source has reported that Major Hasan was also under investigation by federal law enforcement officials for his postings to an internet site speaking favorably of suicide bombing.

Fortunately, not all in the media were hamstrung by political correctness. Here is Ralph Peters in the New York Post (Nov. 6): “On Thursday afternoon, a radicalized Muslim U.S. Army officer shouting ‘Allahu Akbar!’ committed the worst act of terror on American soil since 9/11. And no one wants to call it an act of terror or associate it with Islam. What cowards we are. Political correctness killed those patriotic Americans at Ft. Hood as surely as the Islamist gunman did. And the media treat it like a case of non-denominational shoplifting. This was a terrorist act. When an extremist plans and executes a murderous plot against our unarmed soldiers to protest our efforts to counter Islamist fanatics, it’s an act of terror. Period.”

There was a laudable concern among Americans about a possible “backlash” against all American Muslims. What backlash? Even following the September 11 attacks with their 2,976 victims, Americans behaved with exemplary restraint. They behaved in a civilized manner in the face of barbarism.

It is time to abandon apologetics, and political correctness. Not all Muslims are terrorists. Not all Muslims are implicated in the horrendous events of September 11, 2001 — or of November 5, 2009. However, to pretend that Islam has nothing to do with 9/11 or the Fort Hood massacre is willfully to ignore the obvious. To leave Islam out of the equation means to forever misinterpret events. Without Islam, the long-term strategy and individual acts of violence by Osama bin Laden and his followers make little sense. Without Islam, the West will go on being incapable of understanding our terrorist enemies, and hence will be incapable to deal with them. Without Islam, neither is it possible to comprehend the barbarism of the Taliban, the position of women and non-Muslims in Islamic countries, or — now– the murders attributed to Major Hasan.

We are confronted, after all, with Islamic terrorists; and we must take the Islamic component seriously. Westerners in general and Americans in particular no longer seem able to grasp the passionate religious convictions of Islamic terrorists. It is this passionate conviction, directed against the West and against non-Muslims in general, that drives them. They are truly, and literally, God-intoxicated fanatics. If we refuse to understand that, we cannot understand them.

Jihad is “a religious war with those who are unbelievers in the mission of Muhammad. It is an incumbent religious duty, established in the Koran and in the Traditions as a divine institution, and enjoined specially for the purpose of advancing Islam and repelling evil from Muslims.” That is how it is described in no lesser source than the Dictionary of Islam, so we should not pretend surprise if Islamic terrorists see their mission in such terms.

In the wake of the Fort Hood Massacre, America’s armed forces, the F.B.I., C.I.A., Department of Homeland Security and other counter-terrorist bodies face some difficult decisions about Muslims employed in their services. After all, the view Major Hasan expressed – that Muslims in the U.S. Armed Forces should not serve in Iraq or Afghanistan, or anyplace where they might have to kill fellow Muslims – is precisely in keeping with fatwas issued by such Muslim leaders as Ali Gum’a, the mufti of Egypt, which forbade Muslim soldiers to take part in the so-called War on Terror.

When Muslim soldiers or agents or operatives feel that their primary allegiance is to Islam and not the United States, can we safely allow their service to continue? It is an agonizing question, but one we must confront; however, we cannot properly confront this question while we struggle to pretend that Islam itself is not part of the dispute.

The Center for Inquiry/Transnational, a nonprofit, educational, advocacy, and scientific-research think tank based in Amherst, New York, is also home to the Council for Secular Humanism, founded in 1980; and the Committee for Skeptical Inquiry (formerly CSICOP), founded in 1976. The Center for Inquiry’s research and educational projects focus on three broad areas: religion, ethics, and society; paranormal and fringe-science claims; and sound public policy. The Center’s Web site is www.centerforinquiry.net.

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Pastor pleas guilty to sexual assault charge

webmdave — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 17:27:57 PST

A pastor charged in connection with the sexual assault of a teenage girl has entered a guilty plea in the case.

Timothy Allen Ortiz, 44, Midland, appeared before Midland County Circuit Court Judge Jonathan E. Lauderbach late this morning to enter the plea.

According to court papers, Ortiz entered the plea to a count of third-degree criminal sexual conduct-incest, a charge that was added after he was arraigned. In return for the plea, the original charge of third-degree criminal sexual conduct involving force or coercion will be dismissed. Each of the felony charges is punishable by up to 15 years in prison.

Ortiz was arrested Sept. 21 at his home by Midland County Sheriff's deputies, and was arraigned the next day by Midland County District Court Judge John H. Hart, who set bond at $200,000 cash. Ortiz last month waived a preliminary exam in the case, which is a hearing for a judge to decide if a crime was committed and if there is probable cause to believe it was committed by the defendant.

The Midland County Prosecutor’s Office confirmed the victim is a 17-year-old girl.

Ortiz is being represented by Midland attorney Scott Isles.

Since 2000, Ortiz had served as the pastor of the Father’s Heart Ministries, 4606 James Savage Road.

Sentencing is scheduled for Jan. 14.

STORY LINK

Catholic Church gives Washington an ultimatum on same-sex marriage

webmdave — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 14:38:53 PST

The Catholic Archdiocese of Washington said Wednesday that it will be unable to continue the social service programs it runs for the District if the city doesn't change a proposed same-sex marriage law, a threat that could affect tens of thousands of people the church helps with adoption, homelessness and health care.

Under the bill, headed for a D.C. Council vote next month, religious organizations would not be required to perform or make space available for same-sex weddings. But they would have to obey city laws prohibiting discrimination against gay men and lesbians.

Fearful that they could be forced, among other things, to extend employee benefits to same-sex married couples, church officials said they would have no choice but to abandon their contracts with the city.

"If the city requires this, we can't do it," Susan Gibbs, spokeswoman for the archdiocese, said Wednesday. "The city is saying in order to provide social services, you need to be secular. For us, that's really a problem."

Several D.C. Council members said the Catholic Church is trying to erode the city's long-standing laws protecting gay men and lesbians from discrimination.

The clash escalates the dispute over the same-sex marriage proposal between the council and the archdiocese, which has generally stayed out of city politics.

Catholic Charities, the church's social services arm, is one of dozens of nonprofit organizations that partner with the District. It serves 68,000 people in the city, including the one-third of Washington's homeless people who go to city-owned shelters managed by the church. City leaders said the church is not the dominant provider of any particular social service, but the church pointed out that it supplements funding for city programs with $10 million from its own coffers.

"All of those services will be adversely impacted if the exemption language remains so narrow," Jane G. Belford, chancellor of the Washington Archdiocese, wrote to the council this week.

The church's influence seems limited. In separate interviews Wednesday, council member Mary M. Cheh (D-Ward 3) referred to the church as "somewhat childish." Another council member, David A. Catania (I-At Large), said he would rather end the city's relationship with the church than give in to its demands.

"They don't represent, in my mind, an indispensable component of our social services infrastructure," said Catania, the sponsor of the same-sex marriage bill and the chairman of the Health Committee.

The standoff appears to be among the harshest between a government and a faith-based group over the rights of same-sex couples. Advocates for same-sex couples said they could not immediately think of other places where a same-sex marriage law had set off a break with a major faith-based provider of social services.

The council is expected to pass the same-sex marriage bill next month, but the measure continues to face strong opposition from a number of groups that are pushing for a referendum on the issue.

The archdiocese's statement follows a vote Tuesday by the council's Committee on Public Safety and the Judiciary to reject an amendment that would have allowed individuals, based on their religious beliefs, to decline to provide services for same-sex weddings.

"Lets say an individual caterer is a staunch Christian and someone wants him to do a cake with two grooms on top," said council member Yvette M. Alexander (D-Ward 6), the sponsor of the amendment. "Why can't they say, based on their religious beliefs, 'I can't do something like that'?"

After the vote, the archdiocese sent out a statement accusing the council of ignoring the right of religious freedom. Gibbs said Wednesday that without Alexander's amendment and other proposed changes, the measure has too narrow an exemption. She said religious groups that receive city funds would be required to give same-sex couples medical benefits, open adoptions to same-sex couples and rent a church hall to a support group for lesbian couples.

Peter Rosenstein of the Campaign for All D.C. Families accused the church of trying to "blackmail the city."

"The issue here is they are using public funds, and to allow people to discriminate with public money is unacceptable," Rosenstein said.

Rosenstein and other gay rights activists have strong support on the council. Council member Phil Mendelson (D-At Large), chairman of the judiciary committee, said the council "will not legislate based on threats."

"The problem with the individual exemption is anybody could discriminate based on their assertion of religious principle," Mendelson said. "There were many people back in the 1950s and '60s, during the civil rights era, that said separation of the races was ordained by God."

Catania, who said he has been the biggest supporter of Catholic Charities on the council, said he is baffled by the church's stance. From 2006 through 2008, Catania said, Catholic Charities received about $8.2 million in city contracts, as well as several hundred thousand dollars' worth this year through his committee.

"If they find living under our laws so oppressive that they can no longer take city resources, the city will have to find an alternative partner to step in to fill the shoes," Catania said. He also said Catholic Charities was involved in only six of the 102 city-sponsored adoptions last year.

Terry Lynch, head of the Downtown Cluster of Congregations, said he did not know of any other group in the city that was making such a threat.

"I've not seen any spillover into programming. That doesn't mean it couldn't happen if [the bill] passes," he said.

Cheh said she hopes the Catholic Church will reconsider its stance.

"Are they really going to harm people because they have a philosophical disagreement with us on one issue?" Cheh asked. "I hope, in the silver light of day, when this passes, because it will pass, they will not really act on this threat."

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