tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102Fri, 13 Sep 2024 15:25:06 +0000WTFBoozin ItCheck itFriendsRelationshipsSingledomrantsWelcome to The E Spot, a collection of randomnesshttp://esspot09.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (-E)Blogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-1420652423590023685Wed, 16 Sep 2009 23:12:00 +00002009-09-16T19:33:20.999-04:00Papa was a rolling stoneMama a dog chasing a boneSo I learned to cook dinnerAnd live like a sinnerHow to separate the laundryAnd not cry for mommyShe's gone for the nightBut I'll be alrightJess is here and she brought the party favorsWho knew this booze came in so many flavorsDaddy's no where to be foundNot that I really wanted him aroundNo brothers or sisters to share the burdenHow I'd turn out,http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/09/papa-was-rolling-stone-mama-dog-chasing.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-7487901035700793211Wed, 16 Sep 2009 06:34:00 +00002009-09-16T11:58:36.823-04:00Daddy's disappointment, that I may beBut oh how satisfying to the rebel in meIf only I'd follow your planYou'd accept me for who I amIf I'd simply see the lightEverything will be alrightHow perplexing that I just won't listenI can't see the life I am missingAbsurd to imagine I'm a real grown upOut behaving like such a fuck upSurely I'd meet the standards had you been aroundInstead I watched her http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/09/daddys-disappointment.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-5179954209145242427Tue, 19 May 2009 05:16:00 +00002009-05-19T02:38:26.131-04:00I don't believe I have a girlfriend who hasn't, at some point, discussed her boyfriend/husband's porn collection. Some of them proudly display the collection in between the The Matrix and Season 4 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer in the living room. Others ignore the fact that whenever they type a "p" into the address bar "pussy" pops up. A few will storm into their place of employment with the http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/05/ladies-face-it-your-man-watches-porn.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-2447513891593974200Thu, 14 May 2009 03:43:00 +00002009-05-25T20:29:28.171-04:00I work in retail. This means I am going to spend 50 hours a week listening to people piss and moan over some really stupid stuff-I mean really stupid-I understand that dropping one call a month while you're going over a bridge must be very frustrating when you're driving from Publix over to bingo. Be happy, that could have been death trying to call, your wireless carrier may have just saved http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/05/10-things-i-learned-in-retail.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-4938716816192096787Sun, 26 Apr 2009 22:11:00 +00002009-04-27T01:28:52.588-04:00Actress Bea Arthur, passed away this weekend at the age of 86. I remember for seven seasons, I spent Saturday nights with my grandmother watching Bea, Estelle, Betty, and Rue on The Golden Girls. Even though that may be all my generation remembers of Bea Arthur, her career spanned seven decades. From her theater work, to her role in Maude in the seventies, a liberal pro-choice, advocate of http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/thank-you-for-being-friend.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-8552452763055632691Wed, 22 Apr 2009 05:48:00 +00002009-04-22T01:55:20.176-04:00Check itIf you're not visiting FML (F-My Life) several times a day-you're missing out of some amusing shit! It's a everyday life posts from those moments when you just sigh say"fuck my life."Posted today:"Today, I got a email from my boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know what is more depressing, gettinghttp://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/fml.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-7585876656091332113Mon, 20 Apr 2009 22:02:00 +00002009-04-20T18:37:26.059-04:00rantsEach year, there are 29,000 deaths related to firearms, 85,000 to alcohol, and an astonishing 435,000 of deaths are related to tobacco. How many deaths are related to marijuana use? Zero. Now, I'm not saying everyone should be stoned, a pothead can be extremely unproductive-and not everyone likes to feel high, just like not everyone likes to feel drunk. On any given day we can find an articlehttp://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/happy-420.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-5194971710666054373Thu, 16 Apr 2009 04:14:00 +00002009-04-16T00:16:23.748-04:00I don't have time for your bullshitThis is my world, and you're not in itI've heard this all beforeI was even younger than her first time you walked out the doorI know every feeling she's going to haveBecause yes, you really were that badShe'll wish you were thereUntil she just doesn't careLove you 'til she hates youAnd slowly erase youDon't waste your breath on an apologyOr another way to http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/bella.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-6835575943762566582Sun, 12 Apr 2009 18:31:00 +00002009-04-29T13:46:15.257-04:00The definition of the hope is the feeling that that events will turn out for the best. The definition of naive is to be innocent and gullible. So the real question is how fine is the line between hopefulness and naivety? When does holding out hope simply become a waste of physical and emotional energy?Little girls grow up with the hopes that Prince Charming will someday ride up on his white http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/hope.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-241150700693704448Fri, 10 Apr 2009 03:42:00 +00002009-05-25T20:27:11.769-04:00So you need a license to carry a gun, operate a vehicle, even fish, but any dumbass can have a child. People who can't afford to pay rent are running around having babies all over the place. People with no business being responsible for caring a baby are popping them out by the litter. Perhaps everyone deserves the chance to be a parent, I don't personally believe so, but I'll go with it. http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/hey-breed-em-when-you-can-feed-em.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-1494156323570885578Thu, 09 Apr 2009 06:12:00 +00002009-04-09T02:48:52.057-04:00Seriously, if you're not watching Chelsea Lately on E! every night, you need to start! Her interviews are unlike anyone I've ever seen. She's a little raunchy, a little intoxicated, and a whole lotta funny.http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/chelsea-lately.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-4102180001315075883Tue, 07 Apr 2009 19:23:00 +00002009-04-07T15:37:50.533-04:00So I'm not a huge fan of the Tonight Show, but I am a fan of YouTube. These will make you laugh, I promise!Mr. President, I am a member of the 'I laugh when it's not appropriate club,' so I personally, find Obama calling himself retarded hilarious! So people are all mad that he said that. Well, didn't that kind of prove the whole 'he's a retard' thing just by making that comment? People, get http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/leno.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-6830224520505462068Tue, 07 Apr 2009 19:07:00 +00002009-04-07T15:13:37.126-04:00So, we all smoked a joint with Harold and Kumar and laughed our way to White Castle right? Then we headed down to Guantanamo Bay with them and wondered how we can make one of those fancy bongs that you can use on an airplane! Recently Kal Penn showed up as Kutner on one of my favorite shows, House, MD. Until last night of course, when Kutner committed suicide. Why did he off himself you ask, http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/harold-and-kumar-go-to-white-house.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-4270855721996155817Fri, 03 Apr 2009 17:12:00 +00002009-04-03T20:39:07.387-04:00WTFSo I'm helping this old man, at least 70 years old, get a new phone today. He asks me to show him the alarm function. Since he gets an hour for lunch, he naps in his car. Why is his old ass still working? That's probably a question Arthur Anderson can answer. Anyway,he proceeds to tell me how he really hates the whole hour lunch thing. He says "back when you're younger, you could just go play http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/things-i-could-have-gone-my-whole-life.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-1548202257394655039Fri, 03 Apr 2009 01:17:00 +00002009-04-02T22:58:09.876-04:00WTFSo we all know how cool Google Earth is right? Satellite images of our houses, cars in the driveway and everything. I suppose it was bound to happen, I just can't believe my little cousins didn't think of it first. A year ago 18 year old Rory McInnes climbed on the roof of his home and drew, yes folks, a giant penis. A helicopter spotted the giant wang and alerted The Sun newspaper, who http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/so-we-all-know-how-cool-google-earth-is.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-4839716741088586136Thu, 02 Apr 2009 02:44:00 +00002009-04-02T22:56:22.204-04:00Boozin ItBeats the hell out of regular bongwater! A must try!1 oz Chambord® raspberry liqueur1 oz Blue Curacao liqueur1 oz amaretto almond liqueur1 oz spiced rum1 oz sweet and sour mix http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/dirty-bongwater.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-967908546973466054Wed, 01 Apr 2009 05:31:00 +00002009-05-25T20:34:09.891-04:00SingledomSo, getting my taxes done a couple years back and the accountant leans over and says to me, "well, honey the problem is that you just made too much money." So now, I'm keeled over laughing saying "m'aam, I assure you that's not true!" I sat up and shut up when she responded "no, I mean, you're in a higher tax bracket but you don't have any deductions. Now, I knew what the she meant, but she http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/04/25-no-deductions.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-2351638806234320369Tue, 31 Mar 2009 01:04:00 +00002009-04-29T13:41:05.575-04:00RelationshipsSo I have plenty of married friends, most of us do right? How many of yours are happy? The majority of married women I know are unhappy, unfaithful, and unmotivated to leave. Sure, I know a couple or two who I'm sure will celebrate a fifty year wedding anniversary, but they're few and far between. We've called men dogs for years, but like Jay-Z said "Ladies is pimps too." Even though women http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/03/sex-reparations.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1287065689850977102.post-731582092818240760Mon, 30 Mar 2009 05:41:00 +00002009-04-02T22:58:56.228-04:00FriendsWe all have that one friend, the one we've known our whole lives, the one who is unreliable, immature, and usually trying to borrow $20. As kids we get into all sorts of childhood mischief, a few years later do a stint as rebellious teenagers, take a road trip in college where you learned how to party like a rockstar, and then we grow up and get real jobs and mortgages and life insurance. But http://esspot09.blogspot.com/2009/03/we-all-have-that-one-friend-one-weve.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (-E)0