Leadership Coaching by Dr. Joni Carley | Wisdom at Work

Gandhi’s Neurons: The Practice of Empathy

drjoni — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 14:03:24 +0000

An excellent article from American Express Open Forum. Values-driven leadership means always sharpening empathy. We used to think if a leader was too empathetic then s/he was too soft. What we know now is that without empathy, leaders become self-absorbed tyrants who build dysfunctional teams. Still, we don’t know yet how to measure empathy or its effects on the workplace so it’s still not factored in to bottom lines.

Gandhi’s Neurons: The Practice of Empathy
by Bruna Martinuzzi

http://www.openforum.com/idea-hub/topics/the-world/article/ghandis-neurons-the-practice-of-empathy-bruna-martinuzzi

Feb 03, 2010 -

“If there is any one secret of success,” said Henry Ford, “it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from his angle as well as your own.” This is empathy. Not an easy undertaking, even though scientists have now proven that we are indeed wired for empathy. In this fascinating video by Nova Science, we see how mirror neurons, also dubbed Gandhi’s neurons, act as a “neurological Wi-Fi” to help us connect with other people’s feelings.

Almost one hundred years after Henry Ford’s pronouncement, Dave Patnaik, in Wired to Care: How Companies Prosper When They Create Widespread Empathy shows how a variety of global successful organizations, from Nike to Harley Davidson, benefit from integrating empathy for the consumer as an integral part of their culture.

Empathy is our ability to recognize and identify with the concerns other people have. In short, it is our capacity to care for others besides ourselves. Not only does the ability to empathize make us more successful in our professional and personal lives, but it is also the decent thing to do. It’s the path of the mensch.

With our overloaded psyche and our fast-paced lives, our empathy skills can become corroded. How do we practice empathy? Here are a few pointers:

1. Don’t Take for Granted the Most Important People in Your Life. Is your unwavering focus on the finish line causing you to unintentionally neglect your family’s emotional needs? If so, you might derive inspiration from the poignant words of Brian G. Dyson, a former CEO of Coca-Cola:
“Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them-work, family, health, friends, and spirit-and you are keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls-family, health, friends, and spirit-are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged, or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.”
2. Understand this Universal Human Fear. A fundamental fear experienced by most is the hidden fear of not measuring up. Recognize this and do your part to genuinely make those in your circle of influence feel that they are enough. It’s a powerful act of interpersonal philanthropy.
3. Cultivate an Executive Presence. Much has been written about what executive presence is but one thing is certain: those who possess it have “social generosity.” We invariably walk away from them feeling energized and better about ourselves. This is because they have empathy, the quality that makes them sense our need to feel important. They see us not as we are, but as who we could become. Simply put, they care about how we feel. What a wonderful gift it is, to be able to bestow this on those we encounter. One could argue that it is indeed impossible to have executive presence without empathy because a major requirement for executive presence is the ability to connect with others.
4. Stop Negative Listening Habits. Adele Lynn isolated six negative listening habits, including the Rebuttal Maker (listening long enough to formulate his rebuttal), the Advice Giver (jumping too quickly to give unsolicited advice), the Interrupter (more anxious to speak his words than to listen), the Logical Listener (rarely asking about the underlying feelings or emotions attached to a message), the Happy Hooker (using the speaker’s words only as a way to get to his own message: “That’s nothing, let me tell you what happened to me”), and perhaps the worst of all, the Faker (pretending to listen). Do you inadvertently fall into any of these poor listening habits? Self-awareness precedes self-management. Making someone feel that they are truly listened to is the most foundational aspect of empathy.
5. Beware of the Pygmalion Effect. How you persistently view someone that you closely interact with can have an effect on how they perform—a self-fulfilling prophecy. People are very good at sensing how we view them. We translate this through a multitude of micro gestures: frequently checking email while they talk to us, picking up the phone when they enter our office, or looking away when they speak at meetings. All of these seemingly insignificant gestures are posters with a clear message: you are not important. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and try to experience what that must feel like. Developing empathy involves putting our foot on the brake for a moment to ponder such issues. Our First Nations people have a beautiful saying for empathy—it is: “Walk a mile in my moccasins.”

Empathy helps us forge positive connections with others. It’s a state of mind and a way of being that act as a catalyst to help us create positive communities for the greater good.

Values and leadership

drjoni — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 19:26:17 +0000

“I think Congress and the Senate need to be completely revamped,” said Michael Wish, 30, a Democrat from Medina, Ohio. He added, “The old way of doing things is no longer working.” (http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/12/us/politics/12poll.html?th&emc=th)

He’s right. I don’t think we can get there from here. We need deep systemic change in the way leadership operates – not just at the Capitol but everywhere. There’s a paradigm shift happening right now – a critical mass of people at every level in every sector who have come to Mr. Wish’s realization that business as usual just doesn’t cut it anymore – that the old profit-at-any-cost mentality needs to be revamped into a partnership mindset.

It’s exciting an exciting time to be in the values and leadership field right now. Having helped so many people forge new ways of working has been unbelievably rewarding.

On Branding from Success Magazine Blog

drjoni — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:13:28 +0000

It doesn’t matter whether you’re running a Fortune 100 or your own small business. And it doesn’t matter whether you’re conscious of it or not: you’ve got a brand and it’s important to stay conscious of it and consistent with it. Here’s some sound thinking on brand building

Brands to Last:

Building a Winning and Enduring Brand

From Coca-Cola to Harley-Davidson, find out how to execute a brand that will thrive over the long haul.

Emma Johnson February 1, 2010

http://www.successmagazine.com/building-a-winning-and-enduring-brand/PARAMS/article/985

You’ve got a great product. Fair price. Solid service. What’s the problem? You need a brand, experts say. “When businesses are trying to move from survive mode to thrive mode in a winter economy, the ones that break from the pack have branding on their side,” says Roy Spence, advertising executive and co-author of the branding manifesto It’s Not What You Sell, It’s What You Stand For: Why Every Extraordinary Business Is Driven By Purpose.

Sounds good, but how do you define your brand? And once you do, so what?

Until recently, successful brands afforded companies the ability to charge a premium, says Kevin Roberts, Saatchi & Saatchi Worldwide CEO. “It’s not that brands have been dying, but that they’ve been commoditized,” Roberts says. General Motors and Toyota have largely become interchangeable in many regards, as have Revlon and L’Oreal. Similar products, similar target customer, similar prices.

“The goal is to make your brand irreplaceable, and you do that with emotional connectivity: mystery, sensuality and intimacy,” says Roberts, author of Lovemarks: The Future Beyond Brands. “You want loyalty beyond reason and loyalty beyond recession. For small-business owners, this is even more vital because they don’t have the purchasing power that large corporations do.”

Spence, GSD&M co-founder and CEO of Austin, Texas-based Idea City, puts it this way: “Every business needs to be in the business of improving customers’ lives.” In this, a brand is what he dubs a “sacred promise.” Walmart promises to save shoppers money. Southwest Airlines promises the freedom to fly.

On the consumer side, iPods are a great example of loyalty beyond reason. All MP3 players offer the same promise of functionality and freedom of movement and choice. Yet iPod is the clear market winner as Apple’s biggest money maker, proudly dominating 73 percent of the market and capable of commanding a premium price. Why? The industry-changing slick design and related advertising, reliable customer service via Apple’s Genius Bars, and white ear buds that are so recognizable that “when you see them on the street, you feel as if you and the owner are part of the same tribe,” Roberts says. “You want to take the iPod to bed with you—it makes you loyal beyond reason and price.”

The emotional quotient of branding is not relegated to consumer goods, however. B2B companies have the opportunity to offer emotional connectivity by way of value and reliability. “It’s very hard for the big guys to offer deep empathy,” Roberts says. Adds Spence: “Everyone sells pretty much the same thing. The ones that stand for something survive.”

In the B2B world, the most important things are offering reliable customer service and close relationships to set a business apart from the rest.

An independent computer repair company, for example, competes with thousands of other small businesses in the same space. A computer repair company, however, that is committed to superior service offers the promise to improve the lives of frustrated computer owners on the brink of hurling their desktop off the roof. This promise, if fulfilled, has the potential to build a long-lasting successful brand—not just a profitable small company.

So how do you go about figuring out the essence of your brand, your promise, your emotional connectivity?
Idea City’s Spence suggests starting out by examining why you—or your father or grandparents—started the business in the first place. What niche did the business fill? What need? And what do you have to offer the market that is unique? “Where your talent and the needs of the world cross, therein lies your purpose,” Spence says.

Spence then suggests taking an informal survey of 10 members of your fan base—five frank and honest employees and five frank and honest customers. Ask them, what are you doing right? What are you doing wrong? Where can you improve? What are you doing better than everyone else?

“You want loyalty beyond reason and loyalty beyond recession.”

Many successful brands start with a positioning statement. This will identify the target audience, hone in on competitors, and pinpoint the business’s most compelling benefit. From this, the promise can be formulated. The essence of the promise should be a guarantee that can be delivered now, but is also ambitious. “You can’t make a promise you can’t fulfill—it needs to deal with the moment,” says Stan Richards, principal of Dallas-based The Richards Group advertising firm. “It also has to be aspirational.”

An example of a killer positioning statement is that of The Richards Group client Motel 6:
Target audience: Anyone who is on the road and a budget traveler. “It doesn’t matter how much money you have or if you’re driving a BMW—if you are on the road and on a budget, you are a potential customer,” Richards says.
Competition: Other budget motels including Days Inn, Econo Lodge, Microtel and Super 8.
Compelling benefit: “Always the lowest price of any national chain,” and “always a comfortable place to stay.” These are promises that are both actionable now, but also require planning to make sure they are true in the future.
The sacred promise: Motel 6 offers anyone on the road who is a budget traveler a comfortable place to stay at the lowest price of any national chain.

Establishing the sacred promise is tougher than it may seem, experts agree. But once you’ve gotten it, then the real branding begins.

How do you build a brand that keeps on keeping on?
First, realize a brand is much more than a tagline or elevator pitch. In a general sense, a strong, successful brand will permeate every aspect of the company. “It is everything a company does,” Richards says. “The way employees answer the phone, the way you greet customers, deal with constituents both internally and externally. Everyone in the business is, in effect, making a promise to customers, and everything you do will either enhance or detract from the brand.”

The brand messaging must be consistent throughout all communication—PR, advertising, internal communications—and should be incorporated into every element of employee relations. “The internal audience is very, very important,” Richards says. “The brand should affect the performance of everyone who comes in contact with it.” Training, corporate communications and all business development should focus on this promise. Not only does this drive home the message, but an appropriate promise is inspiring and motivating for the entire company.

The key is to keep the brand alive for the long run. This requires a delicate balance of remaining true to the sacred promise while reinventing the product and messaging to address customers’ ever-evolving needs.

An epic example of brand longevity is Coca-Cola. The company has fulfilled its promise of lighthearted fun for 124 years—with its bottle shape, logo and flavor remaining recognizable for nearly all of that time. Yet this branding powerhouse is constantly inventing new products, most recently Coke Zero with new types of artificial sweeteners, and Diet Coke Plus with vitamin additives.

Innovation is not relegated to product alone, but target markets as well. In 1935 Coca-Cola went Kosher to attract Jewish customers, and today the beverage is being peddled in developing countries that have booming populations with growing disposable incomes, like India and China. Such moves are expected to position the corporation to gross an astonishing $200 billion by 2020.

“Everyone sells pretty much the same thing. The ones that stand for something survive.”

The brand is so successful, so ubiquitous, that few realize that the logo and graphics are in fact gently tweaked every three or four years to help retain a significant market edge over competitor Pepsi Co., which has had some of the most innovative advertising and product advancements in consumer products.

“Coca-Cola has combined the past, present and future in a brilliant way,” says Saatchi & Saatchi’s Roberts. “They’ve approached advertising and packaging in a way that it is always happy, always sociable, and always part of the local community.”

These emotional promises, he adds, are what give the beverage maker its edge—not the bubbly black drink. “There is no technology in making a soft drink,” Roberts quips.

Another example of staying current while remaining brand-true: Southwest Airlines’ promise to keep costs down to afford customers the freedom to fly recently required a CEO-level decision to forgo the new industry movement to charge for all checked bags.

“They realized they were leaving hundreds of millions of dollars on the table, but by not charging, they stayed true to their purpose,” Spence says. “[Southwest executives] decided that they were going to market the heck out of it, get the whole organization behind that decision, and attract new customers in order to stay true to their purpose.”

your professional edge

drjoni — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 17:59:01 +0000

The best way to stay on your professional edge is to anchor in your soulful center. Joni Carley

http://www.flickr.com/photos/ibcali/2414022090/

Values, the Jungle & the Bush

drjoni — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 18:43:40 +0000

I felt an immediacy about being in the remote Amazon jungle where I stayed with the headhunting Shuar tribe. I felt the same thing last summer when I stayed in a remote, primitive village in Malawi, Africa’s poorest country. Both places called me to a presence that I don’t usually experience here in my cushy life in Pennsylvania.

Those treks and others taught me a lot about being in the “zone” of presence – personally and professionally. In remote places, you have to be very mindful when you’re doing the simplest things – going to the bathroom, getting anywhere, making sure 24-7 that you don’t get bitten by tiny and humongous insects, making sure you can physically put one foot in front of the other and live to tell about where you got to…

I was thinking that values-driven leadership is a lot like bushwhacking through the jungle and managing my broken leg in the Malawi bush because, just like surviving and thriving on the edge of civilization, creating a values-driven world has everything to do with where I put my feet, my hands, my mouth and my money – right here, right now.

Living our values has to be personal but we also need a stronger collective presence to what’s going on at a global level. It’s past time for the world’s economic leaders to rise to new levels of immediacy about our commitment to liberty and justice for all – no matter how deep the mud, how hot the air, or how big the bugs. It’s time to place higher social value on values immediately and presently – it’s the best way to survive and thrive.

In my work with visionary leaders at the United Nations and with coaching/consulting clients, I’ve learned that being fully present to our personal, professional and global lives isn’t always the prettiest position to sit in, but ultimately, it’s the most powerful.

Change

drjoni — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 22:19:43 +0000

Change is the only constant. Coaching helps you best negotiate it so that you

keep the winds of change at your back
ride the tides of change with grace
walk the ground of change with balance and joy
use the charge of change to transform potential into reality.

Consciousness & Your Career

drjoni — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 23:03:21 +0000

Build 2010 right

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dig deep, dream big, and take on-the ground inspired action
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Make 2010 all you want it to be. Not only will this be an opportunity to work with a world-class coach, it will combine ancient and modern understandings in a unique blend of learning and coaching as profound as it is practical.

Like other coaching groups, we’ll focus on your specific needs, desires, and career objectives. Unlike most coaching groups, this one will help you capitalize on the wisdom of the universe by connecting the dots between the big picture and your own day to day reality. e-mail for more information

Join in from 7:30 to 9 PM, Wednesdays, February – March. but adon

A $900 value: your cost, only $497
+ a special gift: a copy of Stepping Stones to Success with Deepak Chopra, Jack Canfield, and Dr. Joni Carley

(very limited group size ensures a strong impact on your professional life but also means registration will close quickly)
happiness guarantee: if, after the first session, you don’t feel that this is an excellent investment in your career, let us know and we’ll give you a full refund.

e-mail for more information

Led by Dr. Joni Carley, who has been coaching successful professionals, entrepreneurs and organizational leaders for over 25 years in the US, UK and Canada. She’ll be using the same techniques she uses with United Nations departmental leaders but, unlike her coaching anywhere else, the Cosmology, Consciousness and Your Career group experience will also include lessons and experiential components that will expand your mind and spirit. Guaranteed to help you create the most fertile ground for your professional life to blossom to its fullest.

Just like Olympic athletes use coaches to move beyond the status quo and then stay in front, there’s unique and well-documented benefit to cutting edge professional coaching.

The Secret to Success Is . . . Failure

drjoni — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 21:59:04 +0000

This video is a great take on failure. Great success really requires failure yet we haven’t trained our leaders to capitalize on it. Honda got it right:

via The Secret to Success Is . . . Failure.

The 2 paths of Success

drjoni — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 23:49:54 +0000

In my coaching/consulting work, I’ve found that clients fall short of unleashing ultimate potential because they think of it in finite terms. We’re a goal-oriented society and we’ve come to believe that the only way to succeed is to name a goal, make a plan, work the plan, and attain the goal. Or, not attain the goal and thereby fail. Goal methodology works – no question that many great things have come out of goal setting and achieving. However, as a sole modus operandi, it’s limited and archaic.

An equally valid, but less recognized path is the heuristic way. A heuristic path requires being present in the moment. It requires using discernment to discover right action rather than relying on a set of predetermined rules or steps. The heuristic path requires that we stay conscious of our moral, physical, emotional, and spiritual edges. It’s less standardized and so requires latitude for adaptation. Heuristic contributions can be hard to measure with current assessment tools and have only recently begun to be valued enough to qualify for measurement. Nonetheless, there’s increasing documentation that heuristic elements like relationship, dignity, and creativity have positive effects on productivity, recruitment, retention, and vitality. My own practice with successful professionals confirms what the statistics are finally telling us and I know that’s true for many other coaches.

Opening Doors

drjoni — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 17:30:01 +0000

I have a pet peeve at my fitness center. It’s located in a huge hospital complex so there are brick-sized metal plates on the wall that emergency personnel and frail people can hit to open the doors electronically. It always surprises me how many people will spend an hour lifting weights and will consume electricity to open a simple push door when they’re coming and going.

I was thinking about how that translates to work –

about how often we use up professional resources when we really don’t need to
how we sometimes don’t express our strengths and capacity for growth how we
consume ease and sometimes squander effort
how opening doors can flex muscles we’ve come to work to use, yet we sometimes let the power come from without

Open a door today and walk through on your own terms.