Jack and Jill Page background with characters

How To Compose An Interactive Children’s Book Picture for the iPad!

“I wanted to give you all an outlook as to how a designer has to think when he or she is putting together an iPad/iPhone/iPod background. There is a lot of thought that goes into a cartoon, especially one you can interact with!”

Rough sketch used in development of Goosed Up Rhymes

Goosed Up Rhymes Website

Joe Spadaford

Brain Freeze Entertainment

What I liked.

1. Silliness: That was what kept me watching, either that or the Lortab I was prescribed for my ass. Even the vampire sex was silly, as it should be. Aren’t we sick of the whole sexy vampire bullshit already?
2. The accents: I’m going to be honest with you, I hate southern accents (United States). I don’t hate the people just the sound that comes out of their mouth. In True Blood I find it deliciously hilarious. Every time someone talks I can’t help but giggle.
3. Gayness: I like Lafayette, the towns bar cook and drug dealer. I think he should have had more screen time and I’m guessing I’m not the only one when I can find crap like this in Google images.Also, there’s quite a few gay vampires and “Fang Bangers.” “would you like some of Jerry?”
4. Speaking of gayness and vampires, my absolute favorite thing about the show was seeing Milton from Office Space as a gay vampire that sits at home and watches Heroes.

Things I hated.

1. Anna Paquin: I can’t stand her. I hate not liking the main characters in stories, but it’s tolerable when almost all the other characters are great. I have to say that if she was the only one focused on I would not have made it.
2. Lack of info: This is just something I personally find annoying. The vampires don’t eat, breath, have brain waves or show any other signs of life. I want to know how they work! I like a little scientific explanation to things. I don’t care if it’s bullshit, just give me something so I don’t think about it the whole time.
3. Claustrophobic: I wish they would branch out a little. So far we are only shown this small Louisiana town. I want to know how the rest of the world is functioning with vampires. I would also like to know more about the Tru Blood drink. How does that work?
4. Anna Paquin, I hate her.

Jay Starr is a stand-up comedian in LA. He did a wonderful job helping us out with the Horrorscopes we have on Digital Halftone. He also has a show coming up 11/25 @ Comedy Store in Los Angeles, CA. If you live in the area go check him out. Also here’s a video below. You can find more videos on his blog…

Jaystarr.Tumblr.com

and his MySpace…

MySpace.com/JayWilliamStarr

March 21- April 20

Like anyone else with a goat head and huge bad ass horns, you are a little impulsive, self oriented, and completely metal. Baphomets like to be the center of attention (and Pentrograms!) and live adventurous lives, which is why you probably spend so much time levitating. Baphomets usually do not think before they act- so slow down next time you’re about to slaughter a room full of virgins to appease the dark powers. They are people, too.

Slasher

April 21- May 21

Whether raising money for the glee club, or stalking the glee club with a hatchet, the Slasher has immense perseverance. Even when others have given up, been set on fire, shot, stabbed, beheaded, lasered, or gotten sleepy, the Slasher doesn’t stop stabbing until the stabbing’s stabbed. The Slasher is not fond of change. They like the familiar and routine comfort of life- stalking summer camp lakes, terrifying high schoolers in a twisted dreamscape, knowing what you did last summer, and pottery. Slashers can be secretive, opinionated and stingy, and will also probably murder you and your friends.

Creepy Little Girls

May 22- June 21

Creepy Little Girls are many sided, quick both mentally and physically, and completely dead in the eyes. They are brimming with energy and vitality and horrifying giggles. Creepy Little Girls love to talk, and are always quick to invite someone to come play with them in a hedge maze.

They have interesting opinions and thoughts on things and are not afraid to speak their mind, especially when it involves new families that better get out of this house. Though typically fond of standing and staring vacantly from a distance, Creepy Little Girls will sometimes run at you on all fours on the ceiling and shriek in Japanese.

Big Oogly Spider

June 22- July 22

With Big Oogly Spiders, there is always something more that meets the eye, for they are always partially hidden behind their insecurities, shyness, huge pincers, eight legs, and crazy old lady voice. Effective Big Oogly Spiders always have a crazy old lady voice. A Big Oogly Spider is deeply sensitive and easily hurt, especially by invisible hobbits wielding glowing swords. They are nurturers so they surround themselves with people, whom after a while they will drain the liquids from, or make them meals for thousands of tiny spider babies. They can usually tell of other people’s intentions are good or not. Never dupe a Big Oogly Spider, they can see your motives. And then they will sneak up on you in a cave, pincer you, cover you in webs and cackle (like an old lady).

Pharoh’s Cat

July 23- August 21

A Pharaoh’s Cat is very independent but they need something to control, like a tomb, and someone to admire them and appreciate them, like hordes of Egyptian-themed Undead. This can cause conflict in the workplace should they not be in a position of superiority, as A Pharaoh’s Cat has a powerful drive to succeed, get promoted, and generally carry out the will of Anubis. A Pharaoh’s Cat is a fairly easy sign to attract, and are very receptive to advances, come-ons, and being stroked in the lap of a Pharaoh Lich.

Survivor Girl

August 22- September 23

To the world, Survivor Girls present a calm and collected exterior but on the inside is panicking and stressed. After all, running up these stairs after their boyfriend was revealed to be the killer was the worst idea ever. Survivor Girls have a constant drive to improve and perfect, which comes in handy when you’ve suddenly got to be really, really handy with a pickaxe. They are pure, their motives are honest, and they had better not show their boobies before the credits roll. Survivor Gilrs have a need to accomplish something, like having an acting career after three sequels.

Flock of Vultures

September 24- October 23

Flock of Vultures are the diplomat of the zodiac, because it’s easy to be a diplomat when everyone else is dead. They are able to put themselves in other’s shoes and see things through another person’s point of view, because they like to eat eyeballs. They have captivating charm, elegant taste (no fat chicks) and they are easy to like, as long as you look healthy. They like the attention and the admiration for the people that they have brought together, especially the ones that are still kicking. They express their intelligence through creativity and most are involved in some sort of creative pursuit, like ‘name that organ.’ Flocks of Vultures constantly fuss over their appearance, because no one likes a messy dinner guest.

Pod people

October 24- November 22

Pod People are very complex people, and there is always more then meets the eye. Maybe they are very shy, nervous, or emotionless alien replicas trying to replace the human race. Do not be surprised if Pod People ask questions, because they don’t understand your human emotions. They always want to know why, where and any other possible detail they can possibly know. On the outside, a Pod Person has great secretiveness and mystery and eventual crumblyness when their skin falls off.  They are known to be controlling, but only because they need control to feel safe. Also, they hate Jeff Goldblum.

Headless Horseman

November 23- December 22

Headless Horsemen seem to be guided by luck, because he sure as hell hasn’t got any eyes. Good things happen to Horsemen (except for that whole no head thing) and this is usually because of their optimistic outlook and positive disposition, which attracts good fortune. Despite hardships (again, no head), the Headless Horseman is always optimistic that good things will happen tomorrow and the future carries good luck. Headless Horsemen have a vibrant, expansive personality that is like a man (with no head) on horseback. Headless Horsemen are detached from emotions because emotions hold a person back, and also because it’s hard to be touchy feely when you’re head and shoulders shorter than everyone else.

Evil Priest

December 23- January 20

Evil Priests are very ambitious people, they always have something they are pursuing or summoning, and they want their lives to be useful to others, preferably Dark beings that start out as helpless babies with no pupils. Evil Priests are extremely patient and will wait a long time for something they want, and it can take a long time for the planets to align on the day a 7th son with green eyes is born to a 7th son in a hospital built on criss crossing magical leylines. Evil Priests tend to see life in black and white, or occasionally Chaotic Neutral. They tend to be in control in romantic relationships. It’s the easiest way to break it to a significant other that they’ll be the mother of the Scourge of Carpathia.

Haunted Well

January 21- February 19

Haunted Well is the sign of visionaries, unconventionality, and bad dads. They are constantly discovering something new, like how dysfunctional nearby families are. A Haunted Well never judges others, because as human beings, we are all equal and entitled to our own opinions. Also no one can hear you down here, so you’re probably gonna die. Deep inside, a Haunted Well would never intentionally hurt anyone, but on the outside they are made of stone. They have respect for every human, but dislike nosy collies.

Cthulu

February 20- March 20

Cthulu is the sign of mysticism, mystery and the snobbier branches of science fiction. Most Cthulus are somehow involved with occult or spiritualism, and wouldn’t think twice about tricking a mermaid princess into giving up her voice to become human. Cthulus are very good at understanding people for they have the ability to delve into the psyche, see behind a person’s motivations, and ink out of their hindquarters. They can be very lazy, but are also giant demon squids so they can do what they want, thank you very much.

By:

Austri-mina Torgersen, Jim & Jay Starr

Chunder

“Chunder means to be sick, it originates from old seafareing days when sailers would get seasick and stick their head out of the porthole in their cabin. As they did this they would shout “Watch Under” to warn people in lower cabins of the forthcoming puke. Over the years this has evolved into Chunder.”
-Urban Dictionary

So I would like to thank those at WeLoveWP

“Every year, millions of opossums die attempting to cross the road. This is the story of one that just might make it. “

Website: TheHouseOfIdeas.DeviantArt.com

Now since I’m talking here I figured I would mention Loyd’s first page of Comfortably Dumb will be on the site Monday. So be sure to come back and check that out.

…So this is where I really struggle. I can’t seem to remember if there is anything else worth mentioning.

Feel free to leave comments, questions, accusations, whatever. Also be sure to frolic about  the rest of the site. Feedback is always welcome. I might actually respond to it too!

-Trozdol