I love scrolling through the search terms that people use to find their way to Curly Wurly Gurly.  Some terms make me laugh while others make me want to drawn the blinds and never leave my house again!  There are some strange people in the world and search terms can attest to that.

Here are a few of the most popular terms that bring people to CWG.  For your reviewing pleasure, I linked the search terms to my original posts, in case you missed them the first time around.

• CHEETOS: Years after posting a photo of a girl in a bathtub filled with Cheetos, this post continues to be a perennial hit.
• GRUNGE: I wrote a post discussing ‘fashion’ of the 80s and 90s.  Lots of flannel, boxer shorts, and Doc Marten’s…
• BOB ROSS: Bob Ross inspires a zen-like state for me.  Apparently, I’m not alone!
• WALMART:  This is a fluke.  A few months ago, I wrote about the weirdos that lurk at my local Crudmart and recently, a site called People of Walmart went up.  That site gets insane hits and I’m getting some by default.
• WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE: Oh, I rue the day that I learned that ANCHOVIES are in this yummy sauce. 
• I WANT A CAST: Listen, I wanted a cast WHEN I WAS 8!  Thanks to everyone who emailed (and continue to email) me with offers to do ‘recreational casting.’ 

Honorable mentions go to:

hot furry cat suit, Scrappy Doo death, mohair suit, what is that smell, fake it, candy, Curly Wurly bar

So, what search terms are trending on your blog?

I was born in New Jersey and have lived here for all my 35 years.  Several of my friends have, at some point, lived thousands of miles from home.  But not me.  Even Husban-dito lived in Vermont for a year!  We often talk about moving away, escaping the huge expense that is life in New Jersey.  The state does have proximity to New York and Philly, beaches, and farms, but it’s hard to get around the fact that it’s really crowded and very expensive. 

A move to New York State or Vermont is what we contemplate most, but the idea seems so daunting that I usually pack it up and tuck it in the back of my brain.  My family!  My job!  No OCEAN!  It’s COLD!  I won’t know anyone!  No one will visit us!  What if we hate it?  How can we buy a house if we don’t have jobs to get a mortgage?  What if we can’t find jobs?  What if we end up living in a bus depot?!

Ant and I live about an hour from our respective childhood homes.  96% of our family members live within a 90-mile radius.  This makes for convenient holidays and non-holiday visiting.   But it does nothing for my niggling desire to try living somewhere else for a while.  (Ant is only interested in living somewhere in Vermont or upstate NY.)  We have friends who are about to move to London for a year for work.  My oldest friend up and moved to San Francisco almost ten years ago to go to school.  She met a man, got married, had a baby, and bought a house in the city.  Other friends traveled with the military, moving where the Navy stationed them.

Every summer, when Husban-dito and I travel America by car, I find myself imagining life in the small towns or big cities we visit.  I see us living in an Arts and Crafts bungalow in downtown Bozeman, MT, a loft in San Francisco, a historic home in the Garden District of New Orleans, an old farmhouse on 100 acres in upstate New York, a Victorian in Burlington or Woodstock, VT.  When I feel really daring, I imagine life abroad–an apartment in Venice or a villa in Tuscany.

But the reality is that I’d be the same person I am in all of these places but wouldn’t have a job I love or the family that means so much to me (even if they drive me a bit crazy sometimes!).  It’s a catch-22.  I know I could visit my family if I moved away, but I couldn’t drop by on the spur of the moment for pizza and a game of Scrabble.   

Have you moved away from home?  How far are you from your family and do you wish you were closer?  If you’re still local, WHY haven’t you left?  Am I romanticizing moving away?  Help!  I’m having a mid-life crisis or something!!!

Cooking isn’t my strong suit–I’ll be the first to admit this little factoid (and you won’t get an argument from Husban-dito, either).  My culinary repertoire consists of 5 meals: tacos, fajitas, pasta, ‘breakfast for dinner’, and Shepherd’s Pie.  It should come as no surprise that we eat out a lot.   

Before we go any further, I’d like to state that when it comes to trying new things, I’m not your girl.  I never ate a turkey burger until I was 34 and have yet to try a veggie burger.  Converting from ground beef to ground turkey was monumental; sometimes I can’t believe that I actually made the switch.  Until you’ve dined with me, you don’t know from picky eaters.  The moral?  If I can eat and LOVE this turkey chili, so can anyone! 

I prepared this chili–my signature dish–for our annual Halloween party and it received rave reviews–included one party-goer who refused to believe it was turkey chili because “…it has REAL flavor!”  So many people asked for the recipe that I decided to do a step-by-step with photos on the old bloggaroo.  Let’s get started, shall we?

It’s a simple recipe that even a princess like moi can make–you only need 9 ingredients–most of which you may already have in your pantry.  Raid the larder for the following:

First things first.  Roughly dice a medium white onion and three green bell peppers.  Toss them into a frying pan (mine is 14″) with about 2 tablespoons of olive oil.  Saute until soft and just a bit brown. 

Transfer onions and peppers to either a crockpot or bowl (if you plan to cook the chili in a pot on the stove).  Crank up the heat to high and get ready to fry up some turkey meat.  This is where the MAGIC happens–but only if you follow my instructions.  (I go through the ground turkey meat by hand before tossing it into the frying pan just to make sure there aren’t any weird textures or mysterious crunchy/gristly things that will cause me to vomit while eating.  You can skip this step if you’re daring.)  For this recipe, I use approximately 3 pounds of turkey meat and season it with salt and pepper.

I’m sorry for the disturbingly close shot of the turkey, but I don’t want you to miss the most VITAL step of this chili recipe.  After you toss the turkey into a flaming hot pan, DO NOT TOUCH IT until it burns/browns/caramelizes.  Caramelizing is what gives the chili a nutty, red-meat flavor! In the picture, note how the meat gets a bit foamy and is almost cooked through.  Only flip the meat when it resembles this image (approximately 7-8 minutes).  I flipped the middle piece so you can see what properly browned turkey looks like.

If you’re keeping up, this is what your turkey meat should look like.  I usually break up the pieces of turkey into bite-sized pieces before moving on.

While the turkey is browning, mix together the remaining ingredients in the crockpot (or bowl if you’re cooking the chili on the stove).  I use a box (26 oz.) of chicken stock, 2 tablespoons of chili powder, 2 tablespoons of sugar, 1 can of crushed tomatoes (28 oz), and 2 cans of dark red kidney beans–RINSED and drained.  Toss in about a 1/2 teaspoon of salt, and the cooked turkey meat. 

The longer I cook my chili, the better it is.  I cook it for two hours on high with the lid on and then I turn the lid so it’s ajar, allowing steam to escape, for the last hour or two.  This helps to evaporate some of the liquid and thicken the chili.  If you want to cook this for longer, I advise turning it down to low so the sugar doesn’t burn.

Here’s a shot of the chili after about 4 hours of cooking on high in the crockpot.  Husban-dito was kind enough to hold the spoon for me as I snapped this picture.  Look how the flavors have melded and the chili has developed a deep color…oh, yum.  Come to mama.

Feel free to dish up the chili after it has cooked for a few hours.  You can serve it naked…or dress it up with some cheese, crackers, and sour cream.  If you’re really audacious, you can toss in some jalepenos or red pepper flakes because the chili is mild, not spicy.

Now, let’s eat!

Nat’s Turkey Chili (adapted from The Canyon Ranch Turkey Chili recipe)

• 3lbs. ground turkey breast
• 28oz. can crushed tomatoes
• 26oz. chicken broth (Swanson box has 26oz.)
• 2 cans dark red kidney beans, RINSED
• 3 green peppers
• 1 medium white onion
• 2 tablespoons sugar
• 2 tablespoons chili powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• olive oil for the pan

1.  Roughly dice onion and peppers.  Saute in pan with olive oil until soft; transfer to crockpot or pot.

2.  Turn up heat to high and brown/burn/caramelize turkey on one side.  DO NOT FLIP IT TOO SOON…it must caramelize for flavor!

3.  Rinse kidney beans and add to crockpot.  Toss in peppers and onions.  Add box of chicken broth, crushed tomatoes, sugar, salt, and chili powder.

4.  After meat is completely cooked, add to crockpot.  Set on high and cook for at least 3 hours.  The longer you cook it, the better the flavor!  If you want to cook it longer, watch to make sure it doesn’t burn.  Turn to low after 3 hours.  I leave my crockpot lid ajar during the last hour of cooking to help the liquid evaporate a bit so the chili can thicken.

5.  Dish up with cheese, sour cream, crackers, peppers, or whatever floats your boat.  ENJOY! 

A few of the remaining SLOBs (sassy ladies of blogdom) wanted to stop by and wish everyone a very happy Halloween.  I’ll allow them to speak for themselves.

Well, Bouncer wishes she could offer holiday greetings, but ever since her beloved Bailey went a bit Cujo and ripped out her larynx she’s been on the quiet side.

Connie is getting sick and tired of being a witch–I made her one last year too.  She’s green with envy over Dishy’s costume…and I think her black cat’s got her tongue so she’s not saying much either…

Lately, this one’s been yammering on nonstop about her new house and all the work she’s doing on it.  Don’t believe this blood sucker for a red hot minute.  See her here?  She’s on the phone with her contractor…trying to get him to come over and change a lightbulb for her. 

Hayden’s no help either–not only is her only online photo TINY, but her fangs are getting in the way of wishing everyone a Happy Halloween. 

For the second year running, Panny’s picture is MIA and so is she, for the most part!

Guess I’ll have to do the heavy lifting after all. 

WISHING EVERYONE A HAPPY AND SPOOKY HALLOWEEEN!!!

I’ve been promising pictures of Ant’s Halloween costume for almost a week–forgive the delay (and crummy photo)–things have been a bit hectic here.  I have to mention that this costume wasn’t his first choice–he was actually going to go as the Geico lizard, but due to a wardrobe malfunction, the costume was abandoned days before our party.

I tend to go for more original costumes that involve lots of cursing, sewing, and/or creative thinking.  Husban-dito is more of a ‘buy-it-and-pull-it-out-of the-bag’ kind of guy.  This year he went as “Can’t Cut the Apron Strings“.  I fretted that it might be construed as a bit dirty for a family party, but Ant just laughed and said, “Nat, it’s your family!  They won’t think like that…” 

Were less true words ever spoken????

Here he is in all his splendor…

Ant’s profile pose led to a frankly disturbing conversation in which various family members made suggestive jokes about the costume.  I turned to Ant and said, “You said they wouldn’t think it was DIRTY!!!” 

We’re a classy family if nothing else…

Hello amigos!  Inspiration just struck!!!!!  I was visiting Dishy’s site (and hyperventilating over her house and the work she has to do) when I had a brilliant idea for November’s Blog Challenge!  Yes, I realize I’ve been a bit lax with this, but I’m turning over a new leaf.

Here’s the challenge, should you accept it:

Take us on a photographic tour of where you BLOG from–show us where the blogging magic happens!

Are you on board?  Leave a comment and let me know.  I’m looking forward to seeing all the different decor. 

Well, the CWG & ‘Dito Halloween soiree 2009 was an unparalleled success if I do say so myself!  As hostess, the party theme was in line with my costume (see header).  I was inspired to be this person after my little visit to Savannah, GA last week.  Can you guess who I was?  (I don’t even have television and know who she is, so you’d better!!!)

Activities included: butter carving, butter art, and pin the grease on the butter.  We served up butter-on-a-stick, chicken fried butter, and buttertinis.  A buttery-good time was had by all!   Photos to follow later this week…I just have to upload them!

So, tell me, my little hoe-cakes, what are ya’ll being for Halloween?!?!?!

XOXO
CWG

Guys!!! It’s our favorite time of year over at Chez CWG: HALLOWEEN!!! We’re booked every weekend until November and our party is this Saturday! Wa-hoo! I’m so excited, though you wouldn’t know to peek in my windows.

I’m currently snuggled up in bed nursing a bottle of Nyquil and hoping for the best. I have my costume laid out (in my head) but have to pick up a few accessories. Husban-dito is costume-less at this point…but we’re hoping to having that remedied tomorrow.

I’m putting together the menu–lots o’ goodies, including HalloWEENIES–mini-cocktail franks wrapped Mummy-style in dough, mini-pizzas, quiche, chili, pasta, a taco bar, and so much more. I can’t wait for the soiree–we’re having a houseful this year. Hope the A/C holds up to the challenge.

Disney was a blast–nice and warm down in Florida–and I stopped in Savannah on the way home. I love that city and would live there if not for the humidity and distance from the loco familia. I drove almost 3,000 miles in 7 days (after I got home we turned around and went to Cape May for the weekend, adding 180+ miles to my trip).

I’ve missed you all and will try to pop by your bloggies this week! Any big Halloween plans for you guys? Costume suggestions for Husban-dito?

XOXO CWG

After 14.5 arse-numbing hours in the Honda Fit, I arrived  in Daytona Beach last night to visit my cousin (who is going to college down here).  We are heading over to Disney tonight for the weekend!  Sunday night I’m off to Savannah for a few days. My little sis was supposed to be with me but had to cancel at the literal 11th hour.

I’ll be back next week–have a great weekend!!!

Your resident sleuth and girl wonder is hot on the trail of a missing body part.  My mother came down to visit on Friday and we had a conversation that was so surreal that when I relayed it to Husban-dito he told me to post it on CWG without delay.  Without further ado, I present the Case of the Missing Top Lip.

Back story:  My father has had a moustache for as long as I can remember–at least 35 years.  I’ve seen photos of him from his late teens and early 20s and he was clean shaven back then.  From what I could discern, he did indeed have a TOP and bottom lip during those years.  When I was about 9, Dad got the genius idea to shave off his moustache and the screaming and squealing (from wife and daughters) that ensued was enough for him to regrow the moustache and leave it alone for the next 2o-odd years.

CWG’s MOM: While your father and I were in Florida in the spring I got him to shave off his moustache.

CWG: (slack jawed) Wha?!?  How did you manage that?  I thought he swore he would never again ‘dare to bare’ after the denuding debacle of ‘83!

CWG’s MOM: Well, he did it, and Nat, it was HORRIBLE!  Your father doesn’t have a top lip anymore!!!  He used to have one but now it’s gone.

CWG: (eyes glazing) Mom, are we really having this discussion?  Did you at least get a picture?

CWG’s MOM: (plowing ahead, oblivious to my queries) Do you want to know my theory?  (not waiting for my response) I think that the weight of the moustache pushed his lip right off his face!

(Hello, can you read that sentence again please?)

CWG: ………………. (rendered temporarily speechless that her mother could come up with something so utterly implausible.)

That’s my life.  How was your weekend?  Oh, and if you see a top lip wandering around would you be kind enough to direct it back this way?  Thanks.