Whether it’s a well-meaning relative critiquing your nursery choices or a stranger at the grocery store offering unsolicited advice on your baby’s outfit, the pressure can feel overwhelming. It’s easy to feel like you’re under a microscope just when you’re trying to find your footing in this “new normal”.

You Are Not a Project

When you become a mom, it can sometimes feel like you’ve suddenly become public property. Everyone has a “better” way to do things, and if you aren’t careful, those voices can drown out your own intuition and God’s peace.

Remember, your family is your family. While others may want to help, they aren’t the ones walking in your shoes at 3:00 AM. When I wrote EXPECTANT, I wanted to remind new mamas that “God provides all we need to meet the challenges of motherhood with wisdom and joy”. He didn’t give your baby to the critics; He gave your baby to you.

Finding Your “Belly Band” Community

In the early days of pregnancy, a belly band provides much-needed support as your body changes. As a new mom, you need the relational equivalent—a circle of people who support you without squeezing the life out of you.

Finding “your people” isn’t about finding people who do everything exactly like you do. It’s about finding those who offer grace instead of judgment. It’s about connecting your “wires” with those who understand the unique rhythm of your new life.

As you navigate these new relationships, hold onto this truth:

“Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.” — Psalm 37:5

When you commit your mothering journey—and your friendships—to Him, He will lead you to the community you truly need.

5 Simple Action Steps to Find Your People

1. Audit Your Inner Circle: Take a gentle look at who you’re spending time with. Are they “drainers” or “fillers”? Focus on the people who leave you feeling encouraged rather than judged.
2. Practice the “Wide-Angle Lens”: It’s easy to get tunnel vision when you’re tired. Try to keep a “wide-angle lens” on your relationships. Not everyone who offers advice is criticizing; sometimes they’re just trying (clumsily) to connect. Give grace, but keep your boundaries firm.
3. Be the Friend You Need: Bonding often happens in the trenches. Reach out to another new mom and offer a simple “I’m with you.” Sometimes, admitting you don’t have it all figured out is the fastest way to build a real connection.
4. Filter the Noise: You don’t have to attend every “argument” you’re invited to. If a social media group or a particular conversation makes you feel like an “imposter,” it’s okay to step away. Protect your peace.
5. Connect Your Wires Daily: Just as your baby is learning to connect with the world, you are learning to connect as a mother. Spend a few minutes in prayer each day, asking God to bring one or two “safe” people into your path who will champion your journey.

Mama, you are doing a great job. The opinions of others don’t define your success; the love you pour into your little one does. Walk expectantly into your community, knowing that the right people will love you for exactly who you are.

• If you found these words encouraging, read more about EXPECTANT here.
• Or if the precious minutes you had have run out, just grab a copy here.

The post How to Find Your People When You Have Your Baby appeared first on Julie Sanders.

The unexpected roar of fighter jets overhead interrupted our retreat. I quickly learned that our soothing sanctuary was also home to a military base, with local pilots part of a global conflict. Is there a place to feel safe and reassured in a time of conflict? 

There is one place where we can always find a sense of safety and certainty.

God’s presence is powerful, just, compassionate, and accessible. 

• Power – The “throne” of God is a place where the One with all authority over every other ruler sits. “The Lord has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.” (Psalm 103:19)
• Justice – We shake our heads in wonder at the acts of human leaders. Trying to make sense of decisions and plans we only view in part from a distance, we’re unable to discern the motives of people with power. In contrast, we can know when it comes to God’s role with us as, “righteousness and justice are the foundation of his throne.” (Psalm 97:2b)
• Compassion – Unlike an intimidating or foreboding seat of power, the throne of God is a place of compassionate concern and comfort. “As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.” (Psalm 103:13)
• Access – Few of us will ever access the earthly chambers of power or influence. But God has an “open invitation” policy, an attitude of welcome and reception. He doesn’t sneer at us with condescension or contempt. He urges us to come up close to Him, to know Him and be known, to lay out our worries and our longings for peace. “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)

Perhaps more than one place, safety is found in one person.

The Edelman Trust Barometer looks at how trust is changing each year. At the end of 2025, surveys produced insights that revealed 7 in 10 people are not willing, or they’re at least hesitant, to trust someone from a different background or with different values. People are retreating into smaller and smaller “circles of trust” where they find familiarity and sameness. Only 32% of those who participated have hope that life will improve for their families in five years. The decline of trust means we feel more anxious and less safe. 

• The writer of Psalm 94 says that, “When my anxious thoughts multiplied, your comfort filled my soul with joy … But the Lord has become my stronghold, and my God the rock of my refuge.” 

We don’t have to look for or listen long in today’s landscape to see and hear reasons that could stir up our sense of uncertainty and fear. “Where can we turn?” we wonder. “Is there a safe place left?” we ask. And God answers that He is still the reliable, strong Father we can trust and depend on for help. 

• God intentionally moves away from a power distance and, instead, leans in to be near to us. “The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.” (Psalm 145:18) 

The powerful One we can trust to be just, compassionate, and accessible takes our hand and pulls us close. He wants us to let go of our pockets or rebellion so nothing puts a barrier between us and Him. God wants us to ask, “What needs to change so I can be near?”

We might not have full faith when we start the act of pulling close, but He’ll help that to grow too. He’ll do the work of cleaning away the darkness that threatens our sense of peace and safety. When we clear the distractions and compromises out of our hearts, our view of God becomes clearer, and our sense of His safety becomes more certain.

• “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded,” (James 4:8)
• “Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean …” (Hebrews 10:22)

Where can we be certain to find peace and safety? 

We find safety in coming close to and staying near to our God, the One who deserves our trust. 

Nearness. Safety. 

“You who abide in the shelter of the Most High, who rest in the shadow of the Almighty, say to the Lord, ‘You are my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I place my trust.’” (Psalm 91:1-2)

When the noise and conflict of the world around us invades our quiet spaces and sanctuary places, God wants to be our strong place and our security. This means safety in an emotional and physical sense, giving us protection from anxiety, loneliness, and fear. 

Perhaps more than simply proximity, safety is found in our relational posture with the Heavenly Father who invites us close. If you feel far from Him in these frantic times, you don’t have to. 

Here’s how to start to lean in to an intimate relationship with God that leads to safety and certainty. 

1. Get to a quiet place without interruptions (like fighter jets) so you can speak and listen. 
2. Tell God (out loud or quietly in your heart) what you’re feeling and what you hope.
3. If you’re an artist or a writer, draw or write the questions you have. 
4. Ask God your questions and for guidance in what it means to move near to Him.
5. Choose one of these Psalms to read from this post. You might start with a five minute read for now; add another as you feel ready. Psalm  91, Psalm 94, Psalm 97, Psalm 103, or Psalm 145 (just click a Psalm to read it). 

Friend, the jets may still fly overhead, but we don’t have to give them the power to steal our peace. If you took these steps and want to talk about what happened or what’s next, message me. I’d love to listen and encourage you as you come to the one place you can feel safe and certain – near to God.

The post When the World Gets Loud: Finding the One Place You’re Always Safe appeared first on Julie Sanders.

Dictionary.com says people who get the modern-day moniker of “Influencer” will, “typically boast a devoted and engaged following on their social media platform of choice …” I suppose that means gladiators weren’t really influencers.

How Many Influencers?

We have an insatiable desire to be liked— followed. No generation or time in history has a corner on that market, but technology and social media makes it easier than ever to build a personality profile and a fan base out of filtered messages and images. The media tools moved faster than our wisdom to discern how to use it. In fact, Instagram has over 64 million accounts categorized as “influencers.” In late 2024, 12 million people worked full-time as “paid content creators” in the United States. It seems that humans can’t help ourselves when it comes to loving to be loved.

If influencers have “devoted followers,” do you want to be one? Would you like for an influential person to tell others to give you recognition?

Gladiators, the Queen, Coco, Mommies, and Emily all followed patterns of influence. But I came across the real story of How to Become an Influencer, and it’s too good to keep to myself.

At the end of the first letter the Apostle Paul wrote to friends in the city of Corinth, he wraps up with a section usually titled “Final Instructions.” —The last word. Words not to ignore. He presents a challenge, an example, and then goodbyes.

The example lays out 3 keys in How to Become an Influencer.

The CHALLENGE

Paul leaves a straight, simple challenge for his friends. “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love,” (1 Corinthians 16:13-14). Watch out. Stand firm. Be brave. Live strong. Always—love.

That’s a wrap!

The EXAMPLE

An example makes it clear how the challenge looks when lived out in life. In fact, Paul wanted to be sure his readers absorbed the pattern of how to be an influencer. You’re probably already having an influence on someone around you. Is it happening in your home, your work, your community, your social media accounts, or your church? We all leave a mark where we live. Paul gets specific by describing a man and his family. An influencer makes influencers by sharing an example of an influencer.

“The household of Stephanas” in Achaia refers to a whole family. Not just any family. They weren’t known for lions they killed, tables they set, or perfume they mixed. Stephanas and his family practiced three actions qualifying them for the category of early influencers.

Influencers Believe Truth

In the province of Achaia, which included most of Greece, these folks were the first to believe in Jesus and follow him. We could assume they had conviction, guts, passion, and initiative. They changed from the worldly ways of the culture they lived in, which had a reputation for being a morally corrupt place. As a family, they made a life-changing decision to believe truth, and as a result, they were changed people.

Influencers Serve People

Like today’s influencers, this family put their belief into action in how they approached people. Unlike today’s influencers who gather others for themselves, they “devoted themselves to the service of” others. That means they showed hospitality, gave of their resources, and generally supported and strengthened other people. We all need friends like this.

• The world’s influencers seek devoted followers.
• Influencers are devoted followers.

Ultimately, life-altering devotion to God meant Stephanas’ family served people. They did this instead of accumulating servers and benefits of their own.

Influencers Love Others

Paul talks about how a visit from Stephanas refreshed him. Stephanas took two others, and together, the refreshers lifted up Paul by spending time with him. In turn, Paul refreshed his readers—us. The influence of Stephanas flowed through his loving, relational approach to others. He and his family were focused people, making life-giving deposits into loving the friends and family around them.

In the end, Paul said, “Give recognition to such as these,” referring to Stephanas and his household—his family. I expect this family’s example drew people to them. They certainly had an influence then, as now. They probably even had “followers,” but the difference is who benefited from the following. If people follow us, may we use that influence to point them to truth, to serve them well, and to love them.

These influencers didn’t use people to benefit their platform—they used their platform to bless people. This is the real story of How to Be an Influencer and the clear path for how to be one. (Read the 4 verses here)

• Make a life-changing decision to believe in what and who is true.
• Practice life-altering devotion to serve people, rather than accumulating personal followers.
• Pour out life-giving deposits to love others, focusing on relationships.

“Give recognition to such as these.” Yes—this is how to be an influencer.

The post How to Become an Influencer appeared first on Julie Sanders.

I find answers in learning from women in the Bible, starting with the Mother of Us All. Unlike messages girls hear that our value depends on physical beauty or achievements, the first story of the first woman tells another story. Her story—our story—starts in Genesis 1.

BEAUTY – The Start of God’s Beautiful Plan for Girls

Genesis 1:26-31, 2:18-25

When the Bible says God “made a woman,” it means He carefully designed her, building her into His likeness to reflect His nature. Though she differed hormonally, socially, emotionally, and psychologically from the man He made, her value was no different than the man’s. She was not less. Like the man, she too was “very good.”

The Maker crafted the woman last. Her making came when God said Adam didn’t have a “suitable helper” in all He made to that point. After so many beautiful things, so many “good” things, He added another truly beautiful and precious creature to complete the work. This was part of God’s beautiful plan for girls.

Unlike the first human Adam, the Creator didn’t use earth’s dust to make the woman. While the man was in deep sleep, “The Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man.”

Though the animals had names, the beautiful, precious creature called “female” didn’t have a unique name. She reflected God’s image in the same way Adam did. Designed with equal value, she was innocent and beautiful. With her husband Adam, they had no need to cover themselves in the perfect, shameless garden they called home. It was all they knew, and it was all good from their good Creator.

BELIEF

Genesis 3:1-8

Our ancestor Eve was so beautiful in her clean innocence, but she wanted more than what God gave her. A lot of women feel that way.

Satan got the woman alone, attacking her intelligence and her heart with questions about what she believed. When the jealous enemy Satan asked her to reject what she believed about God, she did.

Satan used a garden tree that Eve had surely seen and walked past. “God knows that when you eat from it,” the Enemy said, “your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” He tricked her with a promise of “knowing more.”

• She rejected the belief that God acted for her good.
• She believed God wasn’t giving her all she needed.
• She believed that trusting herself instead of her Maker made sense.

Woman believed the evil one who came to her when she was alone, whispering doubts and lies to her in secret. Then she invited her only human companion, Adam, to stop believing God and start believing Satan with her. And he did. Satan was right.

“The eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked.” They saw something they hadn’t seen before—the darkness that comes with believing God isn’t good. Right away, their innocence was disrupted. The beauty of Garden life began to fade.

BLAME

Genesis 3:8-13

Who’s to blame when disbelief spoils what should be beautiful? Whose fault is it if we don’t feel like we’re receiving God’s beautiful plan for girls?

Believing the Serpent’s lie exposed the woman. She felt the immediate loss of her honor. Now she not only resembled God; she resembled the fallen heart and mind of the evil one. Her “open eyes” saw her shame, and covering up began. Finger pointing began.

• The man said the woman made him do it.
• The woman said the serpent made her do it.

God saw them and called them out of hiding.

BROKENNESS

Genesis 3:15, 23

Instead of walking openly with each other and with their Maker, sin spoiled affection. They experienced something new in their relationships—separation. Feelings of fear, awkwardness, and embarrassment washed over them. Instead of a future of closeness and companionship, they discovered isolation.

Disbelief spoiled the perfect garden’s beauty and their innocent condition, driving them apart. All humanity was broken in a single act—every girl since the garden has lived with the brokenness the woman felt in the garden.

“Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned.” (Romans 5:12)

BURDEN

Genesis 3:16-19

Since the Creator is holy, no one unclean could be near Him in the garden. He “banished” Adam and the woman from their paradise. Since He made them, He knew them. So He gently covered them (Genesis 3:21) when they tried to hide their nakedness with leaves.

To know what it is to experience evil with good is to carry the curse of sin (Romans 5:19). For a girl growing into a woman, we want the paradise we were created for. Trouble comes in trying to get back the peace we want with our husband, children, and others in our community.

We want to cover what we believe in secret. We feel the urge to control the things and the people around us, a desire both men and women feel.

Not only were the eyes of humanity “opened,” but the disbelief in God’s goodness brought burdens. Life would be painful for men and women in different ways. Work would be hard. Life would be a struggle. Growing a family would hurt. Getting along would cause suffering. Life out of the garden paradise would be life with burdens.

This news had to crush the heart of the first two people, our ancient family members, as they tried to understand what it all meant—ideas and words they hadn’t needed to know before. Could they still believe God is good? Was the Maker abandoning them? Does a girl have to be perfect to be loved?

Even when His creation believes lies about Him, God keeps loving those He made to walk with Him. “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.” (Lamentations 3:22)

BLESSING – Saving God’s Beautiful Plan for Girls

Genesis 3:20

Right after the Creator, God Himself, explained what the consequences of disbelief would look like, He acted with mercy to comfort them. Before we read that God covered them with the skins, we read about another act of comfort.

The woman had not only participated with the man in causing the pain, hidden in shame, and learned she would personally suffer, but she was uniquely called to minister to the coming needs.

In Genesis 3:20, the woman received her personal name. “Adam named his wife Eve, because she would become the mother of all the living.” She would be a nurturing presence to answer the pain of a broken world.

God could’ve sent her out of the garden alone, without her husband or future children. Instead, He showed Eve grace. God’s beautiful plan for girls was not destroyed.

She was still Adam’s companion and wife, still a mother who would bear future generations.  God said her “seed” gave all humanity hope, even as her disbelief led to its suffering. Yes, there would be pain, but there was the promise that her own child would someday overcome her enemy.

One reason we yearn for companionship is to overcome the paradise-spoiling isolation of sin. The God of Peace would one day crush the one who stirred up the disbelief (Romans 16:20). Before Adam and Eve even stepped out into an unknown, unsafe, unloving world beyond the gates of the garden, God put a plan in motion to restore His dear ones to be all He made them to be. By giving His own Son’s life to pay for the disobedience of the first people, He made a way to restore their honor, so they could again bring Him honor.

God’s Beautiful Plan for ME

As the “Mother all the Living,” Eve went out into the broken world as a nurturing, peaceful presence. Once perfectly beautiful in creation, she was tempted to stop believing and tried to shift the blame. She discovered brokenness in her relationships and started to understand the life of burden that would follow. But the merciful Maker reassured her He would make a way to restore the beauty of His plan in her life. He would use her to bring beauty into other lives—all the way to girls today. God’s beautiful plan for girls extends to girls and women in today’s broken world. We too have a beautiful plan for our lives.

God made girls to be beautiful, fully formed as we trust Him, fully healed from our brokenness, bringing Him honor as a nurturing, peaceful presence in a broken world.

The post God’s Beautiful Plan for Girls appeared first on Julie Sanders.

Be ATTENTIVE

Before you and your child step foot into the classroom, the teacher worked on the information you need for a successful year. No doubt, careful thought shaped how much and how fast to deliver what always feels like a lot. Your teacher appreciates knowing you’re working hard to lean in and hear what he or she has worked hard to deliver. They’re held accountable for your attention.

Proverbs 18:13 tells us that, “To answer before listening— that is folly and shame.” Wise people listen when advice is offered (Proverbs 12:15).

Sometimes, it won’t be easy to have another grownup make decisions about and for your child’s days. It may not be easy to hear what another adult has to say about your child, their progress, or their behavior. Conversations may be necessary, and open mindedness will definitely be necessary.

As you pay attention to what they teacher says to you and asks of you, take the humble attitude of willingness to see your child from different angles, through other lenses. The world won’t see our children as we do. Modeling humble attentiveness to a classroom instructor provides a lesson for our watching kids.

Be POSITIVE

When we take those first day of school pictures with a handwritten sign labeling the year, our hearts are full of hope. We may even snap a photo of the new teacher smiling warmly with an arm around our student, making it easy to believe we scored the jackpot with the teacher of the year. But once the first test scores come back and desks get rearranged, our optimism may not take long to wear thin. It wouldn’t be a school year if there weren’t lessons to be learned—by kids and grownups.

We choose the direction of our thoughts. “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)

While the finger paint is still damp, decide that you’ll have a positive posture towards your teacher. Choose to think well of the teacher God picked for your child. When things happen that are hard or confusing, take a deep breath and believe the best as you ask questions and keep an open mind.

Be a STUDENT

Every school year is a chance for a parent to be a learner too. We are students of our own children. They keep things interesting by constantly changing. There is no curriculum to rely on. Still, we can be sure the same God who chose us to parent them will give us the wisdom to walk alongside our learners.

We never stop learning.

“Show me your ways, Lord,” a parent can pray, “teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.” (Psalm 25:4-5)

We need God to show us what we need to know about our kids. He can give us understanding and teach us how to parent them well.

It’s safe to say no parent knows or understands everything about their children. To be a mom or a dad is to enter into lifelong learning about the people God lets us bring into the world. We’ll get along better with their teachers when we choose to view them as a partner. The instructor is someone who can give us another perspective, offer resources, and help us shape the student we steward.

Be a PARENT

More than ever, classroom teachers find students come to school without the benefits of adequate parenting. A lot of kids arrive hungry, tired, and unprepared. Many haven’t learned life skills like following instructions, getting along with peers, cooperating with others, and persevering when things are hard. It’s hard for a teacher to create a stimulating, successful academic setting in school when children are in desperate need of being taken care of.

Who doesn’t want to be the “fun parent?” Kids need moms and dads to be wise and nurturing parents. Hebrews 12:11 reminds us that while it’s not easy to gently train and tenderly discipline our children, it’s ultimately the loving way to raise them.

To get along with the teacher, do your part by being what the instructor isn’t meant to be—the parent. As moms and dads fulfill an all important role in the life of their child, educators are free to focus on teaching. When parents parent and teachers teach, they get along better.

Be PRAYERFUL

Finally, depending on your setting, your child’s teacher may never know this last “be.” To be a praying parent is to enlist the power of God Himself on behalf of your child in the classroom. We could get anxious about the need to get along with the teacher for the good of our child, but God’s word teaches us a better way. It’s the lesson of letting God have the school year and the relationship with the classroom instructor, the school administrator, the bus driver, the counselor, and the other students.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (Philippians 4:6)

By committing to regular prayer about and for our student and about and for our teachers, we shape our own outlook as a parent and the outcomes of our classrooms.

For more encouragement, guidance, & conversation starters this school year, pick up a copy of The ABCs of Praying for Students: A Grownup’s Guide to Encouraging Prayers. Use it with your mom’s prayer group, your spouse, a mentor, or even your teacher.

The post 5 Be’s to Get Along with the Teacher appeared first on Julie Sanders.

A Mom’s Story of Life Shaken

Then, in February 2023 a 7.8 magnitude Earthquake struck Gilan’s home, followed by a 7.5 magnitude tremor. Entire cities were destroyed. Over 55,000 people died. Gilan’s house was so damaged that the government said they had to move out of their devastated house. Along with her extended family, Gilan lived in a tent provided by a relief organization. They all live in an assortment of storage containers and tents, clustered close together for safety and support. Gilan’s husband travels to another city for seasonal work helping to support his family. The economy is shaky in their post-earthquake region. While this helps Gilan and her son Mihadt, it also leaves her home to carry the load alone. 

Hope for One Family

Robin and Salina made regular visits to Gilan’s makeshift shelter. She shared with them about the burden of medical expenses for her son, adding to the rent they would need to have a storage container to live in. With few resources, monthly expenses for shelter and medicine were too much to bear.

As a result, Robin and Salina were burdened to help Gilan in practical ways. They reached out to a non-profit partner to request help for Gilan move into a storage container that would provide a little better shelter. In October 2024, a year and a half after the earthquakes, Gilan’s family received a container to call home.

All this time, Gilan was committed to doing what she could to care for the needs of her son in the midst of so much devastation. 

This Mom’s Story of Learning to Crochet

In time, Gilan searched for a way to help her family, so she taught herself to crochet. She wasn’t asking for a handout. She was asking for help to market what she can make – crocheted bags. She worked to improve the quality and style of her bags. Robin and Salina shared this mom’s story and her products with others. 

Now, Gilan makes baby booties. Again, she taught herself to follow patterns and choose colors that would appeal to other moms with hearts like Gilan.

Still, she’s living in her storage container, making bags and booties, caring for her son with a joyful and hopeful heart. Every pair of booties and each bag is made by this rare mom who knows what it is to give of herself in every way for the good of her child. 

How to Help in This Mom’s Story

To purchase a bag or a pair of baby booties by Gilan, or to inquire about carrying them at your shop or special event, email me here. Find more about the handmade products and suggested donations on this page.

The post Committed to Her Son: One Mom’s Story appeared first on Julie Sanders.

I recently listened to a podcast by the BBC about how Climate Change is impacting Motherhood. Women from places like Nairobi and India talked about their decisions, “Not just whether to parent, but how to parent in a warming world.”

Climate Change Impacts on Motherhood

What’s the big deal about kids and climate change? Is there a legitimate connection? Do more children “burden” creation? Because of weather events and related outcomes:

• Some women decide not to have children.
• Some women limit how many children they have.
• Some women raise children differently.
• Some women miss having children.

Many moms feel concerned about raising a “climate considerate” child, while admitting they also want their kids to have a happy childhood with vacations, birthday parties, and kid-tech. In underdeveloped or population-pressured nations, some doctors point to premature births resulting from a high degree of pollution and a low quality of nutrition. For moms seeing their regional rice fields inundated by flooding and prices rising, they can’t help but consider whether or not they’ll have a good chance of bearing and raising a healthy child. Whatever you believe about Climate Change, the forces of nature impact family life.

Because of this, one mom said, “Deciding to have children in a climate crisis is scary. Sometimes my heart literally aches with fear.”

Climate Change from God’s View

I wonder what the Garden of Eden was like before sin stirred it up and God locked us out. We know some from reading the account in Genesis. Since then, the same Enemy that suggested to Eve that she could do better than what God designed has continued to suggest the same to us. The chaos is real. A steady visual diet of the worlds floods, storms, and famines can keep us in a place where our hearts ache with fear.

Even so, chaos in creation hasn’t done away with God’s direction for people to have “dominion” as the world’s caretakers. The more we know of Him, the more we should lean in to His mandate to manage what He made. When natural world disasters and trends lead to distress, we can hold on to truths that stay with us out of Eden.

• God sends families into the world to populate it. (Genesis 1:28 & 9:1)
• Children are a gift from God and a reason for joy.
• If we need wisdom, God will give it to us when we ask.
• Parents are instructed to teach kids about living well while living well.

“Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it, and have dominion … ,” God said. He knew we would face the storms and the stress of living out of Eden in a world changed by the disruption of sin’s curse.

• How big would families be?
• How healthy would they be?
• How many resources would it take to raise a family?
• How happy of a childhood could the kids of the world expect?

Subduing a changing world creates a lot of work. Family life in a changing world stirs up a lot of worry.

What Doesn’t Change with Climate Change

Nevertheless, as Adam and Eve left their garden home to grow a family, our Maker knew all future families would live in a less than perfect world. Changes in climate, food quality, resource availability, and every other facet of creation would make us mindful of our frailty and give us a desire for our Creator’s care. As we sit beside the cradle of the next generation, we can be sure that God’s interest and tender involvement have not and will not change.

Read more about God’s heart for the family.

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A lot of this happened without us even realizing it. Social media mixes some healthy with some not-so-healthy. It inevitably makes a lot of profiles look like “it moms,” while making others feel like “not-it women”. To raise the concern that social media manufactures messages about motherhood and family into a somewhat muddy mixtures is to risk having our friend list give us a “sad face” emoji or worse—”take a break.”

But what if we tread water just for a moment in the social media waves and think about it? What if we ask questions about social media like:

• Is it helping me be a better woman?
• Is it making me a better mom?
• Is it loving to the other women I know?
• Is it contributing to a healthy family culture?
• Is it presenting a true telling of my life?
• Is it tempting me to boasting or pride?

You may wonder if something made me feel down about social media this year. You’d be right. It’s one of those Mother’s Days when thinking back reminds me of some painful moments of mothering. Facebook won’t show those to my friends list or remind me of them next year. But I know, and it’s made me freshly aware of the curated version of motherhood and family messages we’re all tempted to make.

We have plenty of tools and tips to edit our “real” into our “ideal.” And no one across the social media sphere would know. But our family would. We would. God would.

Here are 4 bold steps to manage Mother’s Day and Social Media

• Keep private moments out of the public eye. It keeps them precious between family. Some people in our lives don’t want treasured times to be diluted by sharing with the masses.
• Acknowledge your motivations. It may be good and a gift to family, but it may not be. When you consider what picture and words to share, who are you thinking of?
• Resist the urge to exaggerate or spin the truth. If you decide to share, tell it like it is without over-sharing. Lots of dramatic language is usually aimed at getting people to think we’re amazing and our life is so amazing. It’s rarely accurate.
• Take a social media break and use the time to spend with your loved ones. Social media has infiltrated our lives so we don’t realize its impact on our thinking. To reset your perspective and remove temptations to compare, take time away from the stream.

In the evening hours of Mother’s Day, I fear some of us scroll through photos, trying to like and comment, but seeing ourselves as “left out women.” Other’s feel like “loser moms.” Still others edit images and wrestle with words to post, feeling like “let down moms”—whose families didn’t make the day all they dreamed it would be. And there are women who post genuine words of gratitude with photos of true life lived as daughters, friends, sisters, grandmothers, moms, and friends—they’re in the stream of Mother’s Day posts too, celebrating good things. It can be a lot to go looking for the genuine, to not get bogged down, and to keep our messages sincere and in line with loving our neighbors as we love ourselves.

3 If’s to Manage Mother’s Day and Social Media

• If you POST on social media this Mother’s Day, be honest and be honorable about others and to others.
• If you SCROLL on social media this Mother’s Day, be loving to yourself and to your neighbors.
• If you KNOW social media isn’t a good place for you to be this Mother’s Day, it’s really okay to “take a break.”

You might also think more about friendship, singleness, and mothering.

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When people think of family life today, brokenness and even trauma tarnishes the hope of a happy home life for many. Others wonder if it’s ethical to put pressure on limited resources to raise a family. Some even say that bringing children into the world is selfish, even immoral.

Pronatalism, Hell, & If We Bring a Baby into the World

On the other hand, pronatalists like Malcolm and Simone Collins believe their fertility profile makes them ideal candidates to have a big family that helps to offset what they see as a population problems on the horizon. Decreasing birth rates have a lot of people worried about potential economic strains. Should all the beautiful, healthy, and smart people have children while the rest of us watch from the sidelines?

In an interview near the end of March, singer Chappell Roan made strong statements about mothering. Actually, she said, ““All of my friends who have kids are in hell.”

Not yet 30 herself, Roan went on to say, “I actually don’t know anyone who is like, happy and has children at this age.” She continued, saying, “I have literally not met anyone who is happy, anyone who has light in their eyes, anyone who has slept.” Those are fighting words for women who bear the stretch marks of biologically bringing children into this world and for any mom who bears the heart marks of raising children in this world.

Chappell may not be completely wrong—mothering is sure to include some sleep deprivation and dim eyed moments or days. But are moms unhappy about it? Roan isn’t the only young adult asking whether or not it’s worth it to make personal sacrifices to join the ranks of motherhood. Is it worth rejecting God’s plan for marriage to result in children? Without jumping to judgment, I have to say I’m really glad people are thinking so much about this crucial question.

Is it still a good idea to bring a baby into the world? In complex times, complicated questions are sometimes best answered by a return to simple answers.  

God oversees their design

This answers the pressure we may feel.

A mother’s womb is the wonderful place where a new life is made. There, God directs the creation of a child’s form and substance (Psalm 139:13-14) and declares it “wonderful.” When a personality merges with abilities, strengths, weaknesses, and obstacles, the fingerprints of God are on that little life. Life’s circumstances and relationships will shape the person, but the divine Maker Himself has taken responsibility to go from blueprint to baby.

God plans their future

This answers the fear that we may experience.

Moms today stand before a heap of options like podcasts, apps, technology, audiobooks, and more when it comes to getting “all the info” about raising a baby. Without knowing it, we may find ourselves feeling the need to know it all, find all the answers, and make it all work! The thought of getting it wrong when we have some much access to what’s “right” is downright terrifying.

Before a morning dawned, all the days from cradle to ___ have been written in the Designer’s book and “planned,” (Psalm 139:16). God Himself saw a child before she had a form. He knew the outcome of her days before a single day began. His plans been made, and we need not fear.

God loves each one

This answers the worry that might overwhelm us.

If you’re contemplating whether or not you could bring a child into an unloving world, you can know your child is already loved in it. In fact, it’s in our DNA to love others, “because He first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)

We deliver children into a life of being loved. Even when our love as human parents is inadequate, even when the world around us is the opposite of loving, God has spoken love over the life of every little one. If we focus on the failure of the world to love well, we may feel overwhelmed. But take heart in knowing to be born is to be loved.

God cares for mothers

This answers the needs we have as women.

If you’re listening to what a woman gives up or gets for being a mom, listen to the thread of honor woven through scripture. From Genesis 3 when the first woman received the name Eve—mother of all the living—to the Proverbs encouraging a son to listen to his parents and live so he brings a mom joy. Jesus himself modeled mindfulness about his mother’s needs and well-being. (John 19:25-27)

Despite what Chappell Roan says, being a mom doesn’t mean your own needs are ignored. God’s design for motherhood isn’t perennial sleep deprivation and the loss of that “light in their eyes.” Motherhood is hard work, but motherhood is holy work.

God shows up in families

This answers the problems in our culture.

Are all families doomed to have problems and hurt each other’s feelings? Well, yes. Yes they are. Family life isn’t perfect even if you look to God for His help every day and night. But it’s a space where He stays and works and helps and leads and provides. God made the blueprint for bringing children into families, and He’ll be there from conception to maturation. (Deuteronomy 6:5-7)

There is joy in bringing a baby into the world. Having a family and a home doesn’t have to be hell on earth. Quite the opposite—God helps us raise the children He gives us. He oversees the making of every child, plans their future, loves each one, cares for the mamas, and shows up in family life. It’s still a great idea to bring a baby into the world.

EXPECTANT is a New Mom’s Devotional to help women expecting a child or new to motherhood by giving her faith, encouragement, and grace. SHOP for EXPECTANT on Amazon or Barnes & Noble.

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These are troubled times. Some of the chaos isn’t new. Every generation has it’s distress, though the names of the characters change. After all, purple finches have never been “purple”; they’ve always been red. In troubled times, we have a lot more than the color of finches on our hearts. What can we trust?

Not knowing what to trust troubles us. I, for one, am not sure who’s telling the truth most of the time! I read what friends post but don’t “like” or share, because I’m reluctant to pass on unverified, false claims. While I don’t believe the sky is falling, after hearing it over and over, my eyes instinctively glance upward—just to check. In troubled times, even what was true before seems to be uncertain.

So what are we to do in times when even a “purple finch” isn’t actually purple and we’re glancing up more often in case the sky really falls? We know, “There’s nothing new under the sun,” (Ecclesiastes 1:9) but when we’re living it, the trouble is fresh. My younger friends feel it, and my older friends feel it. What are we going to do?

Writers Who Lived in Troubled Times

A group of writers living in a time of wealth and war wrote an answer to this question. The “Sons of Korah” were part of the group who led worship in their society under the leadership of King David, the ruler who began as a shepherd. The Sons lived in times when people put their confidence in the wealthy and powerful, while oppressing the poor and vulnerable. Sound familiar?

These Sons of Korah were warriors and worshippers, and God gave them understanding about how God’s truth intersects troubled times. They recorded it in a song for their day. Since trouble has a way of repeating throughout history, the truth-song also works for now.

The audience of Psalm 49 includes all people, locally and globally. You can read the whole song here. It addresses the rich and the poor, the powerful and the powerless. It is about humanity and for humanity. The Sons say, “My mouth shall speak wisdom; the meditation of my heart shall be understanding.”

Bring it on!

“Why should I fear in times of trouble?” (verse 5a). With my tea in hand and purple (really red) finches at the window, I’m on the edge of my seat, waiting for their answer.

REST in What’s REAL in Troubled Times

We need to know how to know what’s real. Uncertainty spirals into anxiety when we don’t know what we can count on. The Sons explain. (All of the quotes are from Psalm 49.)

• We’re surrounded by cheaters—people who “trust in their wealth and boast of the abundance of their riches.” We’re not imagining things.
• We’re short-lived. “Truly no man can ransom another, or give to God the price of his life.” My translation: The powerful only think they’re powerful.
• We’re certain. “Even the wise die; the fool and the stupid alike must perish and leave their wealth to others.” Every human life ends.

Those who put their trust in the wealth generated by ambition, in their time that is temporary, and in their control of circumstances are on, “the path of those who have foolish confidence.”

Power and prosperity are illusions we can’t trust. Earthly riches, power, and even life are temporary—not to be counted on. Instead, we can know what’s REAL. God preserved His word for us so we can have a reliable way to guide our thinking.

There will be people who applaud the “foolish confidence” crowd addicted to ambition. Not even the best fixer in the world can keep the world’s wealthy and powerful from meeting the same end as the pauper, the unemployed, and the destitute. Because of this truth, in troubled times we have to reorient ourselves.

REORIENT my Thinking to What REMAINS After Troubled Times

The way of those who put their trust in God is so different than the “foolish confidence” path. What path on you on during these times or uncertainty? There’s less traffic on the trust-in-God-path, but it’s the path that leads through troubled times.

Psalm 49 reassures me that God “will ransom my soul” from the power of evil that strangles the world we live in—He’ll take it back from despair. In fact, God Himself “will receive me.” My future is secure, even if the sky does fall someday.

God ransoms and receives us from negative power over our lives. This truth carries us in troubled times if we turn our focus away from power hungry people and the “falling sky.” Instead, it’s possible to walk in the peace promised by the Heavenly Father. This is why the Sons encourage us to, “Be not afraid when a man becomes rich, when the glory of his house increases. For when he dies he will carry nothing away; his glory will not go down after him.” (Psalm 49:16)

It’s easy to get caught up and consumed with the crowd going the way of “foolish confidence.” That’s a dead end. I don’t have to let them drag me that direction. Pompous people will pass. Instead, God’s word shows us what lasts—what will remain when all the wealth and power, all the technology and posturing has long since passed away.

Giving trouble our full attention robs us of our present peace and future hope. Instead, we can reorient our thinking and our conversations to line up in the direction of what’s eternal.

“But what about the trouble right now?” people like us ask in every generation since the Sons of Korah wrote Psalm 49.

• For now, we can rest in setting our minds on what’s REAL. Reject what’s not real, not verified, not sure, and don’t amplify those messages.
• Reorient our thinking and living to prioritize what REMAINS. What will out-live this trouble? Invest, speak up for, and hold fast to what will last.

The warrior-worshiper Sons of Korah in King David’s day close the song with this summary statement: “Man in his pomp yet without understanding is like the beasts that perish.” (Psalm 49:20)

Should I Fear in Times of Trouble?

We don’t have to. When trouble rises and we feel anxiety rising with it, we can rest in what’s true and reorient ourselves to what outlasts chaos and conflict. Troubled times are times to reach out for divine help and support. With the wisdom and understanding God promises, we can rise above and through troubled times.

(All excerpts taken from Psalm 49 unless otherwise noted.)

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