ChronicleLive - Chronicle People

The Living Proof

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 23:31:35 +0000

Hello again

I hope that anyone who finds their way to this blog, without any prompting or promoting from me, is content with your life today, and that if you aren't as happy as you could be, that you will finds ways to seek the truth, that each of us can access so much inside of us and around us, to give us the strength we sometimes need at times to see us through some of the most painful experiences we go through as we journey on.

How is it that we can feel our hearts raw with emotion on the one hand, as if our heart might shatter into a million pieces when we hurt the most, and on the other hand, almost at the same time, have a sense of faith and hope that we can make it through our darkest days? If we ultimately continue to seek out our own truth and happiness for ourselves and for others, surely we can achieve this?

So many questions at this time, questions that I will continue to seek answers for.

Tonight I went out with my amazing and wonderful friend Susan, who I love and respect to bits for countless reasons, one of many being that she helped to open me up to a way of being that has changed my life for the better for life and beyond.

Together we went to see a truly inspiration film tonight, and for me, one of the best and most meaningful films and story that I have witnessed on the big screen. If you are one of the lucky ones who ever gets to see this film or even read the book, I imagine it will touch your lives too.

To top it, as the titles were going up at the end of the film, the theme song was played that had an immediate and profound impact on me. I have played it 6 or 7 times in the past half hour and it helped me to get in touch with many feelings and thoughts about where I am just now, and where I might be going, even though I can't know where I am going just yet.

The story of remarkable and courageous women inspired the magical Mary J. Blige to write then record a song called The Living Proof. Worth a listen if you want strength and inspiration right now.

Sending love to anyone who welcomes love into their lives, whether we know each other or not. Even strangers that spread their love and happiness can't they.

Effortlessly connecting with the natural flow

Mon, 10 Oct 2011 09:37:56 +0000

Hello again

After taking some invaluable time out for myself over the past few years, I have reached a wonderful place where I am more content and happy than I have ever been before.

I consider myself to be extremely fortunate that I could take so much time away from my work, time out to re-evaluate what really is important to me and what I wish my own next steps to be.

During this period I have allowed myself the luxury of enjoying the here and now, rather than spending time and energy thinking about the future, in other words, I have been practising what I have been preaching to my clients for years.

Following events that took place in my life, I managed to hit rock bottom, and the great thing about that is there is only really one place to go from that place, no matter how long it might take to climb back up again. Where there is a will there is always a way. By taking time out I now have the clarity I was seeking and my cheery and positive outlook has returned.

Now I am effortlessly connecting with the natural flow and it feels magical and exciting, so if you wish to share the next part of my journey with me, let's see where that takes us together.

Happy Monday
J
:)

Bone scan check-up - how healthy are your bones?

Tue, 22 Feb 2011 16:48:07 +0000

With a growing passion for many things relating to health, well-being and personal development I am open at all times to exploring new avenues, so today while with my fab friend Susan Lawrence, I learnt quite a bit more about the importance of healthy bones.

As with many things over the past 5 years when writing columns or blogs for the Evening Chronicle, I am happy to be able to pass on new knowledge, new choices available to all of us, as well as sharing new chapters in my life as they unfold.

I am therefore passing on to you this moment, more information given to me for my own interest and to see who else might want to explore with me as I book my place to have a bone scan on Monday 14th March in Newcastle. Anyone wishing to join me with 9 remaining slots available in Newcastle can book their place once reading the information below.

Enjoy the rest of this lovely mild spring type day

Jayne
:)

Prioritising your life to help create a healthy and happy balance

Tue, 25 Jan 2011 09:29:08 +0000

If you received a message right now from someone important to you indicating that this person needed you with them this instant, would it be fair to say you would stop what you were doing and get to them as soon as humanly possible if you could?

Are you familiar with the busy game that I used to play until very recently, you know, the one we mostly make up that tells us we are way too busy to be with people we love the most, or much too busy to do something we love doing for ourselves that makes us happy?

Do you sometimes or often make other people and their needs more important than your own needs? I've been guilty of that one and I know that many other women feel the same way.

Have you ever caught yourself thinking or saying that others are selfish if they do what they want to do when looking after themselves and their own needs? If so why do you think that is?

Well if you can answer yes to any of the above questions you might like to read on, though I do have a few more questions for you first, if you don't mind.

When was the last time you allowed yourself time to do exactly what you wanted to do for you, doing things that nourish your heart and soul?

If you stop for a moment to think about your life today, what are the most important things to you in order of priority? Might it be that people in your life who you love and care for are more important than the things you allow to get in the way of you spending more time with these significant people?

Work is important for sure, as is earning a living to help provide for ourselves and our families. Interestingly enough though, when I ask children what they want most from us adults, it becomes apparent that time, love, practical and emotional support are far more essential to their happiness and well-being than anything money can buy.

During the past 7 years since joining the world of the self employed I had caught the ridiculous busy bug, the one that meant I had deluded myself into thinking or believing that I didn't have enough time for the people and things that matter the most to me. I had allowed work to largely take over my entire life and it cost me dearly. Sometimes it is too late by the time we decide to prioritise the important things, but it doesn't have to be from now on for any of us.

In the past I have dipped in and dipped out of doing things I love doing for me, but never before had I allowed myself time to experience anything quite like the past month, where I focussed completely on myself, my own wants and needs.

Around mid December I had been thinking more about family and friends in London that I hadn't seen for a few months as well as many other friends I hadn't seen since July 2003. I knew I wanted to travel south before Christmas and then a call prompted me to go the next day.

One of my great friends in London is Pauline, an 88 year old lady who I have known for years and who I love to bits. We speak on the phone virtually every day and the day before I headed south Pauline told me she had a nasty eye infection that meant she woke up one morning looking like she had been punched in the eye.

Soon after that call my case was packed with enough clothing to last me some time.

Unlike any other visit to my old home city, this time I had a clear intention to spend quality time with loved ones and to have no set date to return, so armed with an open return ticket that was valid for one month, my luggage and I travelled to the smog.

Time with loved ones and in doing things I love to do including walking, seeing films, yoga and swimming gave me more consistently magical moments than I had ever experienced in a month of my life, many moments that I intend to share with you in the coming weeks, for within the moments of bliss came such clarity, contentment and peace.

I have noticed for some time how women in particular complain bitterly that the men in their lives make time to do what they want to do to fulfil their own wants and needs, such as watching or playing various sports or pursuing other hobbies and interests. Selfish is the primary word that many women seem to link with their partner's choice as to how they spend their own spare time. Why? Why is it selfish for anyone to make time to do what they want to do in their lives? Life is precious and can be taken away from us in an instant, so why live with resentments or have regrets?

As I approach my 51st birthday I know that it's never too late to make changes in our lives that help to bring about even greater happiness, so if you feel ready to make adjustments to your life in order of priority, please consider that where there is balance there is harmony.

Jayne

If you would like to contact me direct by email please write to me at info@jaynegoldstone.com

Best is every day

Thu, 20 Jan 2011 15:32:00 +0000

Hello again. Firstly I would like to wish you all a belated happy, healthy and successful New Year, and while we are already into the third week of January, it is never too late to wish good things for anyone, whether we know each other or not.

It has been a week today since I returned from a visit to London, and over the next month it is my intention to share with you the most wonderful month I have every had and the insights and clarity I now have that will stay with me always.

In the meantime a close friend Karen emailed the following to me today. When I use something written by someone else in my columns or blogs I endeavour to acknowledge the author, but in the case with the wonderful messages and reminders below, I cannot do so because the author is unknown.

As this wasn't titled either I have taken the liberty of calling it Best is every day

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a
silk paper wrapped package:

'This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.'
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
'She got this the first time we went to New York, 8 or 9 years ago.
She has never put it on, was saving it for a special occasion.

Well, I guess this is it.

He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other
clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died.

He turned to me and said:

"Never save something for a special occasion".

"Every day in your life is a special occasion".

I still think those words changed my life.

Now I read more and clean less.

I sit on the settee without worrying about anything and just relax.

I spend more time with my family & friends and less at work.

Money is to be spent not saved.

I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived
up to, not survived through.

I no longer keep anything.

I use crystal glasses every day.

I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it.

I don't save my special perfume for special occasions; I use it
whenever I want to.

I go out with my friends whenever I want to rather than thinking I
don't have the spare money or time.

The words 'Someday...' and ' One Day....' are fading away from my
dictionary.

If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do
it now...

I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she
wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell.

I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.

She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels.

She might have told everyone how much she loved them.

I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favourite food.

It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my
time had come..

Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.

Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.

If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because,
probably, there's someone you care about.
If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to
yourself that you will send it 'One of these days', remember that 'One
day' is far away... or might never come...
No matter if you're superstitious or not, spend some time reading
it.

It holds useful messages for the soul.

Please don't keep this message, share it

Why my handbag won't come shopping with me again

Tue, 16 Nov 2010 01:06:13 +0000

Hello again

I hope that you have all enjoyed the summer now that it's well and truly behind us, and that you are taking in the many stunning scenes and colours that autumn brings with it before winter sets in.

It has been ages since I last submitted a blog, and I do so now in the hope that I might be able to prevent you from going through something very unpleasant that I experienced last weekend while shopping at my local supermarket.

Fighting off a cold I was on a mission to get through our small shopping list, before heading home to bed.

Like many ladies, I tend to use rather large handbags, and the trouble with this is that the bigger the bag, the harder it is to find anything. To make my life easier, or so I had thought, I decided that rather than rummage through my handbag to find my purse, I would put some cash in a side pocket of my bag, along with my credit card and petrol voucher as I was low on fuel and needed to fill up on the way out.

Twelve items later I queued at the checkout and only then spotted that my cash, credit card and petrol voucher were missing. I quickly emptied the contents of my bag, hoping that the money had slipped inside but soon realised it really had gone.

Feeling sick and shocked, I queued at the service desk to report the theft. To add insult to injury the store manager refused to put a message out to ask customers to take extra care of their personal possessions while doing their shopping. It wasn't as though I was asking the store to broadcast that a theft had taken place even though it had but merely to remind people to take extra care in public places.

I am not in the habit on naming and shaming, hence not sharing with you the name of the store, even though I still feel aggrieved at their lack of care and support to myself and other customers who could find themselves in the same ghastly situation.

I know it wasn't the supermarket's fault that someone had stolen from me. I put that down to my own stupidity. Instead of carrying my handbag I had placed it in the trolley, leaving it wide open at that, something I have done on countless other occasions. I know that many other women do the same, so please ladies learn from my daft mistake to avoid this happening to you.

Due to extremely low energy, I have been unable to work for many months, hardly earning a penny in this time, so the money that was taken from me felt like an even greater loss. I have comforted myself since by thinking that the person who stole it must have needed it more than me, so I hope they put it to good use! I also take enormous comfort that my bag and its entire contents weren't stolen at the same time as that would have been far worse, and I count that as a blessing instead.

People who are intent and stealing from others are on a mission to do just that, so let's not make that easier for them.

If you are going to carry a bag with you, use a shoulder bag and ensure that it is closed or zipped up. It is so easy to be distracted while shopping, so please take extra care. Better still, if you don't need to take a bag with you, carry your money or cards in your pockets, reducing the risk further.

Until the next blog keep safe, well and happy

Jayne

If you would like to write to me, I'd love to hear from you. info@jaynegoldstone.com

Big Waters Nature Reserve - A joy for adults and children

Thu, 02 Sep 2010 11:10:33 +0000

As good fortune would have it, yesterday when I walked Chip at
Big Waters near to our home, I came across two smashing guys who turned out to be Rangers at Big Waters and at three other countryside sites looked after by Newcastle City Council.

The really strange coincidence for me was that only the day before when walking with Chip, as I watched him jumping about in a small stream I caught sight of some stickleback swimming in the clear water. This reminded me of countless visits to local ponds as a child when I'd fish to see what I could catch. That then got me thinking about the newts and tadpoles I caught over the years, along with snails and other pond life and how I have not seen any Newts for years.

I have never grown out of my love of nature, so to my enormous delight the Rangers showed me what they and some children had managed to find at Big Waters, including tiny newts. I was as excited as I'd been as a child to see these newts and an array of other creatures that inhabit this pond that were now on show in a plastic tray.

On chatting to Neil and Michael, I was so pleased to see them both encouraging young children to participate in this activity. As parents walked through the park gates with their children, Neil and Michael greeted them with big smiles, fishing nets, plastic trays and sheets with many different forms of pond life to look out for, inviting the kids to see what they could find themselves in the pond and what they could tick off their lists.

I knew I had to walk Chip before heading home to meet someone. As I walked him for the remaining time I had at Big Waters, I got thinking about so many benefits for being outdoors in nature, and how wonderful it would be if many more adults and kids could take advantage of this beautiful and peaceful environment on our doorstep.

When I walk outdoors it helps clear my head, leaving me in a better frame of mind to tackle everyday chores. As I am allowing myself some greatly needed time away from work, I have worked out on my walks that never again shall I return to the hectic schedule I created for myself. Now that my mind is more peaceful and calm I have started to notice so much more in nature that I had missed on previous walks over the years. Only this week I noticed a plant growing that I'd never seen before, with a stunning delicate flower in rich deep purple and a deep yellow that took my breath away with its sheer beauty.

I have spotted many different birds on my walks and in the park as well as some stunning Dragonflies. For those less keen on nature and more keen on aircraft, you can spot many of these flying over as they head for Newcastle Airport!

If you would like to find out more about Big Waters and other nature reserves in our wonderful region, why not send an email to big.water@newcastle.gov.uk. While the children are on school holidays it's an ideal time to arrange alternative days out like this and it won't cost you a penny. You can visit Big Waters 365 days of the year and it even has a picnic area that you can enjoy, so why not take full advantage while we have a bit of the summer left before the colder weather sets in.

I'm happy that to this day, no matter what is going in my life, I still take great pleasure from the simple things in life that I know are good for my soul, simple things that might be good for yours too.

To find about more about Jayne's work in the coaching and training world, why not email her info@jaynegoldstone.com or ring her on 0191 270 5126

Where do Butterflies go when it rains?

Wed, 18 Aug 2010 15:22:26 +0000

Back from London yesterday afternoon after a fairly long train journey back north, I decided, knowing Chip isn't a fair weathered friend that we both needed to stretch our legs and get some fresh air, so regardless of the rain outside we'd grab a walk.

As a frustrated thespian, increasingly these days when I'm outdoors on walks with our pooch, I start chatting away to myself as though I were on a TV program talking on one of my favourite subjects, the big outdoors, so yesterdays stroll was no different there.

I asked questions of my imaginary audience, questions I posed such as "When was the last time you took a walk in nature when it rained? Did you allow yourself the opportunity to experience all the positives that go with walking in the rain? Are you like many Brits who spend so much time complaining about the weather instead of actually enjoying it? Can you see that each season and weather condition brings many spectacular occurrences? Do you take Mother Nature for granted? Might you become a happier person if you focussed on the positives in everything including taking a walk outdoors come rain or shine?

Once again I did just that and a list of positives came pouring out of me as did feelings of enormous gratitude. Something as simple as a walk outdoors in the peace and quiet on a rainy summer afternoon is something I imagine many people would wish to do were they able to.

I enjoyed my rainy experience immensely. Firstly I noticed the smells that go with rain, a freshness that rain brings, a unique atmosphere it creates, the sound of rain falling, the vibrancy of plant life, the difference in feel to the ground we walked on as the rain intensified, the taste of freshly picked blackberries and raspberries coated in raindrops, vastly different from any berries purchased in shops, organic or otherwise, and even the feeling of soaking wet socks and trainers that squished away with each step taken, and the thought that when we got home I could remove all my wet clothing, jeans and the lot, take a warm shower and change into something fresh and dry.

Being the curious creature I am, I asked a question aloud as Chip looked back towards me with a blank expression. Where do butterflies and other inspects go when it rains? The sudden and apparent absence of butterflies and other insects I love to observe daily saddened me.

Soon it was time to head back and as we did we passed a lady out walking with her dog. There I had been feeling so great about my wet walk, when it became apparent that this stranger did anything but delight in the afternoon rain, grumbling about it as she hurried past.

I guess once again this is a case of me seeing the glass as half full or even over-flowing where others see it as empty, so I gave thanks for that too, knowing I'd rather see and focus of the positives any day.

Seeking to find an answer to my question about the absence of butterflies and insects in the rain, when we returned home I went onto the Internet and to WikiAnswers and here's what was noted.

Butterflies stay under flowers, leaves or other vegetation like a number of other insects do. They will cling to plant stems or the like that are "under" other parts of the plant to get them out of the weather.

Perhaps next time you are out walking in the rain you will take time to spot the good things that go with this experience.

If you have any questions you would like to ask Jayne on positive thinking and living, why not send her an email info@jaynegoldstone.com

How Peter the Pigeon came to my rescue

Fri, 13 Aug 2010 14:50:18 +0000

Saturday a week ago I had arranged to spend some time with a close friend of mine Julie, while Clive went over to see mum (my ma-in-law). Julie and I had agreed to walk our dogs together before then going to grab a spot of lunch. On returning from our walk and leaving the dogs at home, just before we set off for lunch Clive called me to tell me that he and mum had found a pigeon in mum's garden that looked like it was dead or dying.

Ever since I was a very young child I have had an immense love for animals and nature and have never liked to see any creature suffer. Much to Clive's amusement I don't even like killing insects, and in the summer months when ants are out on the pavements in force, I do my best to avoid stepping on any. With spiders, wasps, bees, flies and other insects, I catch them in glasses using paper as a lid, before finding a window or door to free them without harm.

Clive, knowing me as well as he does, knew I would want to help this bird if I could. Thankfully Julie was fine for us to go to mum's home to see what we could do. On arriving it was clear that this pigeon was weak and might have been inured too. We tried ringing the RSPB but being a weekend their office was closed so I called ALN Veterinary Group where we take our dog Chip and managed to make an appointment at their surgery in Morpeth.

Once the pigeon had been seen by the vet, we were relieved to be told by the nurse that it wasn't injured in any way, though I was sad to also be told that our good intentions might have backfired and interfered in nature. It turns out that young pigeons are still often watched by their parents when they have fallen from the nest, even when we cannot see the parents and that with human contact, young birds can be rejected or even killed by their parents or other adults with their own young nearby. As we had removed the pigeon from the garden, it would now need feeding every two hours by hand. I was given two small syringes to feed the pigeon with and we were on our way.

Back home I managed to get hold of a cardboard box and some straw. I tried grinding some birdseed in our food processor and purchased a bird feeding coconut shell that contains fat and seeds for birds to feed off. Filling one syringe with birdseed was hopeless, but thankfully the pigeon was able to eat for itself, and with the other syringe I filled it with water that the pigeon began to slowly drink.

As much as I disliked doing so I dug up a worm from the garden which the young pigeon gulped down.

Placing the pigeon on our lawn it could hardly stand and was very wobbly on its young claws, falling down at regular intervals and its wings weren't too good either. As the Pigeon, now named Peter by Clive was able to pick at food itself we all felt happier about that as we knew it stood a much better chance of surviving.

With so much more free time at present, I was able to devote myself to nurturing this young pigeon, observing daily the progress it made. It would regularly fall down and with a little assistance from its surrogate mum, I helped it to stand again. On one particular occasion I had my heart in my mouth as I watched it fall on its back, and had to do everything I could to stay put and not interfere to see if it would manage to get itself up using its own developing strength and skills. To my sheer delight and with great relief, I watched as it did just that.

I took the pigeon onto our lawn each day and would have it stand on my fingers as a way to encourage it to spread its wings and start using them more, even though it still couldn't fly.

Day 2 I took Peter back to mum's garden hoping that we might catch sight of his parents. We did indeed see an adult pigeon, though it seemed more committed to the birdseeds I had placed on the lawn, then to the young bird in its sight and even became aggressive towards Peter. After 4 hours in the afternoon sunshine I took Peter back to our home, where Chip greeted him with half an interest. I gave Peter more water and again placed him on my fingers so he could stretch his wings, wings that thankfully seemed to be getting stronger by the day.

When I thought back to the first time I saw the young bird looking so feeble it was really good to see that it was looking much healthier and far more alert.

On day 3 of his Goldstone visit, with much trepidation I decided to take Peter back to mum's garden and to leave him there overnight. I knew it wasn't natural to have him enclosed in a cardboard box or to be indoors in the first place. That might have felt right and vital for the first few days but now I had to trust Mother Nature to lend her own helping hand.

After spending quite a few hours in the garden with mum and Peter, I fed him one last night with water and food and then left him in the place he had chosen for the night, tucked up in a corner under a tree. I hardly slept a wink that night wondering if I had done the right thing and knew that the morning would tell its own story.

Early the next morning I drove round to mum's and headed straight for the garden, where to my delight Peter was sitting in the same quiet corner. I picked him up and put him on the lawn and fed him more food and water. By day 4 with our feathered friend, Peter was much stronger, even though he still fell on his side and was still a bit wobbly.

Within a few minutes of his last mouthful and placing him on my hand again, he flew up to a tree and then back down again and we were over the moon.

Mum and I had to go out together for quite a few hours, and most of the time we were out we worried how our little friend was doing, knowing that there were many feline visitors that ventured into mum's garden. When we got back we both went to the garden and couldn't see Peter anywhere. We were so happy because we thought he had flown off, but then noticed him in a bush quite high off the ground. He seemed to be stuck so I went next door, introduced myself to mum's neighbour, explained the situation and asked if he had a ladder I could climb. I couldn't quite reach Peter so managed instead to gently push him, at which point he took off in glorious flight to a neighbour's roof. That was a sight to behold until I watched him slip down the roof, over the gutter and out of sight.

We had come so far and I knew I couldn't rest until I checked to see if Peter was OK. I managed to find the house where he had flown and fallen and couldn't see him anywhere. Knocking on strangers doors, people kindly allowed me to look in their back gardens but he was nowhere to be seen.

As I drove home I knew that I couldn't have done anything more to help Peter and hoped with all my heart that he (or she) had made it.

During the days that Peter was with us and the days that have followed, I have thought how much this young bird has actually helped me from the brief encounter we had, by showing and reminding me of the following things.

With many months away from work having been weakened by a situation, and left without a sense of purpose, with Peter, once again I had something important and meaningful to focus on
The experience in caring for Peter confirmed to me that at times when we are weakened, we can all do with a little helping hand to support us back up again
Growing can sometimes be challenging and painful
There is something extra special about being called into service
When we give 100% of ourselves miracles do happen
We can help others in our commitment towards their success and
well-being, but what helps even more is that whether a bird or person, we must also do our best to help and encourage others to help themselves more
Sometimes we get lost and find ourselves in strange and unfamiliar places but help and support is never that far away when we reach out and accept it
There will be times when we feel our wings have been clipped and we are powerless, but with perseverance anything is possible
We don't always know if we have made a difference or where the journey will take us, so we must learn to trust and to surrender our fears
There are times when we can be battered and bruised but we recover
Just because we are sometimes hurt or weak that doesn't mean that we are powerless
Don't give up on others or yourself
There is always a way even when at first you can't quite see it
We can all make a difference to anything if we choose to
With love and encouragement anything is possible

One step at a Time

Fri, 23 Jul 2010 15:27:18 +0000

Had my darling father-in-law not passed away just over 5 weeks ago, he would have been celebrating his 81st birthday today and my family would have been celebrating with him. Dad was a wonderful man who I loved so dearly and deeply for countless reasons and who I miss every single day.

Since Dad passed away I have been taking some much needed time out, and feel extremely fortunate and blessed that I can do this, with the absolute support and understanding of my fantastic husband, family, friends and clients.

Have you noticed how busy people seem to be these days, and how often we talk about being busy as though that is always a good thing? Sometimes being busy can prevent us from taking time to reflect, re-charge, make positive changes and grow. I've played the "I'm busy" game for a long time too and am now done with that game, because only now can I recognise how stressed and tired I really was.

In my business and on a regular basis, I help my clients take their next steps, and mostly when I support people in a coaching context, I invite them to focus more on the here and now and to find a way to create a healthy and happy work/life balance.

I am allowing myself time to do the same so that I can find the clarity I am seeking, in order to see where that takes me in my work and in my life. How fortuitous then to receive an email today from the late and great Eileen Caddy, a wonderful and inspiration lady who was also one of the founders of Findhorn in Scotland, a place I was able to visit four years ago, for a peaceful and insightful week way from the hustle and bustle of daily 21st century living.

Whatever is going on in your life today, yes it is good and helpful to think about your next steps, yet it is also so helpful to find ways to trust more that situations will present themselves to you when the time is right.

Wishing you a lovely weekend

Jayne
x

Guidance from Eileen Caddy

One Step at a Time

Never try to look too far ahead; that in itself can cause great strain and stress. You can only take that one step at a time and the next will follow at exactly the right time. Let things unfold and do not try to manipulate them. Do not get annoyed and impatient when things do not work out quite as you had expected and hoped; but instead look for and see the purpose and plan running through all that is taking place and realise that all is for the very best.

23 July 2010

Gratitude - it's all about attitude

Wed, 26 May 2010 10:12:13 +0000

How often do you stop and think about things in your life to be grateful for?

I attribute most of my happiness and success down to my attitude towards life.

Let me give you a few examples of the way I approach every day events.

Last Friday, after an extra long working day, I came home and walked our gorgeous dog Chip. Whenever I walk Chip, I allow my mind to drift and often take inspiration from our walks in the big outdoors.

As we walked in the lovely afternoon sunshine I started to think about my work and how I am building my new company. It occurred to me that while at this time I don't have many paying clients, how great it is that I have managed to arrange several really good swap of service arrangements, where money doesn't have to play a part in the exchange. I then thought how special it was that with the healthier and happier life I have created, the balance between work and home life is spot on.

My energy and focus during my walk helped to create really excited feelings about the way my life and plans are developing. After walking Chip I knew that I needed to do some housework and with my positive thoughts came an increase in my energy levels, just in time for my housework slot.

Do you ever catch yourself complaining about doing your housework?

As I started to hoover the house I thought to myself how lucky I was to live in a lovely home with the man I love that I am married to, and that my hard working mate is bringing home the dosh that allows us to live the way we do, until such time that I can contribute more to our financial pot. I started to think of all the people who didn't have a home to live in or loved ones to share their life with. As I went about my cleaning mission I started to appreciate even more how lucky I was to have indoor electricity and a Hoover to make my work so much easier. It wasn't that long ago that most people had to get down on their hands and knees to clean a floor or carpet, yet somehow we take these day to day benefits for granted.

Once my housework was done at around 7pm, I felt great and so did our home. I thought to myself how lucky I was that I was fit enough to do the best part of 2 hours solid grafting, with loads of energy left over for my next task.

Next on my list was to get the dinner preparation done and the table laid. Do you ever complain about having to cook? Do you enjoy cooking? Much to the amusement of family and friends, when I'm cooking I will often pretend that I'm on one of those cookery TV shows as I talk to the imaginary camera. It passes the time and I love it, and I always manage to create giggles in the kitchen area as I do my theatrical cooking performances. Who says cooking has to be boring?

Onions chopped, out came the frying pan and in went the onions. Who doesn't like the smell of onions frying in a pan?

Just about the time I had completed all my cooking and the meal was ready, my husband pulled into our drive and Chip started barking at the front door in sheer delight. Yes it had been a long day and a long working week, but now it was the weekend. A few drinks later we sat down to our evening meal together, another thing I really value and appreciate enormously.

Saturday morning and it was food shopping time for the week ahead.

Some people complain about food shopping, queues, out of stock items or other related shopping moans. I don't!

Believe it or not I always think first how lucky and privileged I am to have enough money to buy food and how much I love cooking and sharing food with others.

When I hear people complaining about shopping I think back to a story my ex mother-in-law shared with me in 1991. She had invited a lady through her church to come from Czechoslovakia to stay with her family for Christmas a few years earlier. This lady had never been outside of her country and came from a very poor community. When my mother-in-law took her shopping just before Christmas that year, the woman broke down in tears. She explained that where she came from people would often have to queue for hours just for a loaf of bread. She had never seen a supermarket and could hardly believe how much we had in the way of choice.

I am glad I heard that true story all those years ago. I have never forgotten it, and if I ever catch myself getting a little tetchy while shopping, I stop myself and think about others far less fortunate that us.

One really good way to help yourself stay positive and happy is to spend a lot of time looking at what you have in your life to be grateful for, and to waste as little time and energy as possible talking, thinking or focussing on people or situations that contribute to a negative mindset and attitude.

For example, instead of complaining about a difficult client, improve your relationships, communication and systems for working with your clients and be grateful that you have clients who help you pay your bills.

Instead of moaning that your spouse comes home late from work, be happy that they made it home safe and sound.

Instead of fighting with your kids over silly things, be grateful that you are blessed to have them, when many people out there would give anything to have a child of their own, or have lost children through tragedies such as the dreadful coach crash that happened on Monday this week.

We take many of our relationships for granted. How often do you part company with someone you care for saying "see you soon"? Soon might never come again!

Don't hold onto grudges or resentments. You will be hurting yourself and life is too short and fragile to waste a moment.

When you next sit down to a meal someone has cooked for you, it might not be your favourite meal, but remember someone has taken the time to do something for you and you are one of the lucky ones who has food to eat in the first place.

Why not make up a gratitude list so you can fully acknowledge just how lucky you are and how many things in your life you too can be grateful for.

I'm signing off now so I can go upstairs and pack a small bag before heading to London today. My 2 closest friends are taking me to Paris early tomorrow morning as a belated 50th birthday treat, and what a treat it will be with us 3 chicks hitting that stunning city.

Have a great few days - I know with my gratitude attitude I certainly will.

If you would like to share any experiences about positive attitude or wish to share anything you are grateful for, I'd love to hear from you.

Tel: 0191 270 5126 Email: info@jaynegoldstone.com
Twitter: @BeingMagnetic

A child's eye view of childbirth

Mon, 24 May 2010 17:39:25 +0000

Hello again,

How have you been over the past few weeks? Really well I hope, and probably feeling better than Sarah Ferguson right now!

The sunshine we are having here in the UK is certainly helping to create lots of positive energy, so to help add to that I thought would be nice to share the innocence of a child's take on childbirth. My lovely friend Lynley just emailed this story across to me, written by an anonymous American writer. I haven't changed a thing including any spelling. This tale made me smile even more than usual, so now I'm spreading this sweet story so that lots more people can benefit from it too.

Happy Monday to all of you and I wish you a great week ahead.

Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher
I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.
When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually,

Show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater.
She holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday.'

'First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.'

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.
'Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)

' My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.)

'And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands mimicking water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe.

They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-center, (placenta) so there must be a lot of toys inside there. When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up in there.'

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat.
I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another ' Middle Wife' comes along.

Now you have two choices....laugh and close this page or pass this along to someone else to spread the laughs. I know what I did!!!

Live every day as if it is your LAST chance to make someone happy!!!!

If you would like to find out more about the work I do, I'd love to hear from you. Email info@jaynegoldstone.com Tel: 0191 270 5126

Making your vote count on Election Day

Thu, 06 May 2010 17:25:26 +0000

Hello again

It's been some time now since I last wrote a blog for the Evening Chronicle, and lately quite a few people have been asking me to write more, so what better day than Election Day to get back in touch and share some thoughts with you now.

Earlier this morning I met up with a lovely lady called Katherine who I met for tor the first time a few weeks ago at a BNI event in the region. I warmed to Katherine within moments of being introduced to her, and then to my absolute delight I found out that she is a writer.

Having spent 3 delightful hours in her company I found Katherine to be really fascinating and very inspirational on many levels.

Parting company three hours later, as I drove home I started to think about other people who inspire me, including my incredible Aunt in London. Thinking about my much loved Aunt, who through hard work and dedication has achieved so much in her life, things that most people dream about, I remembered once again that of course it's Election Day in the UK today. I knew that I had a lot of work to get through today, and that I would have to find time to visit my local poling station to cast my vote no matter what.

Amongst the vast list of my Aunt's achievements, at one stage in her long and successful career she was Chair of The 300 Group, a group established in 1980 as an all-party organisation to campaign for more women into Parliament, the European Parliament, local government and public life.

As a woman I am well aware that women fought long and hard, some even sacrificing their own lives in order than women could one day have a vote that would count.

I listen and observe people on a daily basis complaining about all sorts of issues in the UK and worldwide, people who readily will point the finger at others for the problems they are experiencing, yet many who are reluctant or unwilling themselves to do anything to bring around the changes they desire.

Whether like many people today you have lost interest in politics, our political parties and leaders or even your trust of our politicians as a whole, you can still use your vote to help make our politicians sit up, listen and then work towards bringing about positive changes you wish for.

Politicians after all are men and women like you and I, who make their own mistakes like you and I, and who like the rest of us are far from perfect.

We are all capable of wrong doings, though each of us is also capable of doing great things to make up for our shortcomings.

As with many news items these days, more often than not we hear so much more about the bad stuff that our politicians do, but what about the good and great things that many manage to achieve for us? Why is it that our media machine doesn't present the balance in every story to feed back to us the hard work and commitment that our politicians do for us?

We might complain about our politicians when it comes to their expenses, their extra marital affairs, and other scandals that are brought to our attention, but let's also remember that there are many journalists out there who are committed to digging up the dirt to discredit public figures as a way to help sell papers that we buy.

Can you say hand on heart that you have fiddled money, been unfaithful and done wrongs yourself?

If moaning and complaining were replaced by a wider sense of shared responsibility and personal accountability, we could all work together to help create a world we are happy to live in for ourselves and for all future generations.

Men and woman have fought for years to bring about democracy that allows us to be able to stand up and be heard. Even today with people living under horrendous regimes and dictators around the world, we have our brave soldiers fighting in foreign lands to help those much less fortunate than us lead different and better lives. For those people who have never experienced democracy until recently, many are now prepared to risk their own lives to actually use the vote they have been given, and some have tragically died in the process. Thankfully we don't have to fear such atrocities in the UK but many of us take this and so much for granted.

Yes we have our problems in the UK, and yes there is certainly vast room for improvements to be made. We can all make a difference by taking actions and by using the gift of a vote that is our privilege to use.

Right then, I'm off with my official poll card to help make my own difference.

If you would like to share anything with me about Election Day, casting your vote or on any other life topics, I'd love to hear from you.

Email info@jaynegoldstone.com or ring 0191 270 5126

Miracles do happen

Thu, 25 Mar 2010 18:58:10 +0000

One of my very close friends in London has just sent the following and very touching story to me. It touched me so much that I thought I'd share it with you now. I know from personal life experiences and from the work I do, that people go through so many tough things in their lives and that some of you reading this now might aleady be going through something very painful.

No matter what we face in life, life is very precious and stories like the one I am sharing with you below, I hope will help you to believe in miracles for your own life. I haven't changed a word or the American spelling to our UK version. It's perfect as it is.

Sending lots of love out there to anyone who needs it - could that be most of us human beings?

You are My Sunshine, My only Sunshine'
(Be prepared to get watery eyes!)

Like any good mother, when Karen found out that another baby was on the way, she did what she could to help her 3-year-old son, Michael, prepare for a new sibling.

They found out that the new baby was going be a girl, and day after day, night after night, Michael sang to his sister in mommy's tummy.

He was building a bond of love with his little sister before he even met her.

The pregnancy progressed normally for Karen, an active member of the Panther Creek United Methodist Church in Morristown, Tennessee.

In time, the labor pains came. Soon it was every five minutes, every three, every minute. But serious complications arose during delivery and Karen found herself in hours of labor.

Would a C-section be required? Finally, after a long struggle, Michael's little sister was born. But she was in very serious condition.

With a siren howling in the night, the ambulance rushed the infant to the neonatal intensive care unit at St. Mary's Hospital, Knoxville, Tennessee.
The days inched by. The little girl got worse. The paediatrician had to tell the parents there is very little hope. Be prepared for the worst.

Karen and her husband contacted a local cemetery about a burial plot.

They had fixed up a special room in their house for their new baby but now they found themselves having to plan for a funeral. Michael, however, kept begging his parents to let him see his sister. I want to sing to her, he kept saying.

Week two in intensive care looked as if a funeral would come before the week was over.

Michael kept nagging about singing to his sister, but kids are never allowed in Intensive Care. Karen decided to take Michael whether they liked it or not.

If he didn't see his sister right then, he may never see her alive.
She dressed him in an oversized scrub suit and marched him into ICU. He looked like a walking laundry basket.

The head nurse recognized him as a child and bellowed,
'Get that kid out of here now. No children are allowed.'
The mother rose up strong in Karen, and the usually mild-mannered lady glared steel-eyed right into the head nurse's face, her lips a firm line.
'He is not leaving until he sings to his sister' she stated.

Then Karen towed Michael to his sister's bedside.

He gazed at the tiny infant losing the battle to live.

After a moment, he began to sing.

In the pure-hearted voice of a 3-year-old, Michael sang:

'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine; you make me happy when skies are gray.'

Instantly the baby girl seemed to respond.
The pulse rate began to calm down and become steady.

'Keep on singing, Michael,' encouraged Karen with tears in her eyes.

'You never know, dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away.'

As Michael sang to his sister, the baby's ragged, strained breathing became as smooth as a kitten's purr.
'Keep on singing, sweetheart.'

'The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping, I dreamed I held you in my arms'.
Michael's little sister began to relax as rest, healing rest, seemed to sweep over her.

'Keep on singing, Michael.'
Tears had now conquered the face of the bossy head nurse.
Karen glowed.

'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
Please don't take my sunshine away.'

The next day ... the very next day, the little girl was well enough to go home.

Woman's Day Magazine called it The Miracle of a Brother's Song.

The medical staff just called it a miracle.

Karen called it a miracle of God's love.
NEVER GIVE UP ON THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE.

LOVE IS SO INCREDIBLY POWERFUL.

Life is good.

Have a Wonderful Day!
Just send this to (4) people and see what happens.

50 and Fab

Thu, 18 Mar 2010 10:19:17 +0000

This time last week, my lovely husband and I had already watched dawn breaking on our last day in Lanzarote. Clive had taken us away for a blissful and much needed break, where we were both able to relax and chill out together in a warmer climate after what has been a rather harsh winter. It was also Clive's way of treating me to something very special to celebrate my 50th birthday, which we did in style. On the rare occasions we have been away in our eight years together we have usually opted for self-catering holidays or staying with friends or family, but this holiday was extra special as we stayed in a hotel where we didn't even need to make our own bed or cook a single meal. Working as hard as he does meant that we could afford to grab this week away and the benefits for taking 7 days out has done us both the world of good.

Unlike previous holidays, not once did I check or even think to check my emails in the hotel lobby and nor did I take my mobile phone with me, thus really switching off from the outside world, allowing both of us time to fully enjoy each others company away from everything and everyone. Despite deluding myself by thinking that the world and it's people couldn't get by without me for a week or longer, I know that's simply not true now and never was!

On the morning of my actual birthday (which happens to also be International Woman's Day and something I'm very proud of) we'd had breakfast in our gorgeous hotel, and had then driven to a harbour which we both love to visit. We sat out in the early morning sun overlooking the sea surrounded by lovely boats, sipping yummy Cappachinos, which in Lanzarote they serve with a huge dollop of whipped cream, dreadful for the waistline but great for ones taste buds.

Whenever we go away together we always take our Backgammon travel set which we love to play while watching the world go by. Only trouble is that I've come back owing Clive ÃÂ£49.00 as we play for money, a pound at a game, and yes he actually takes the money off me. Mind you I haven't actually paid him any Backgammon debts since our first holiday together in Corfu 7 years ago but the IOU remains safely tucked away in the board!

I wasn't actually sure how I would feel turning 50, but to be away with the man I love and having the time of my life, made the whole experience such a joy, after all, 50 is just another number and any age or milestone event is just about our attitude towards it.

My life means something to me and so does every day that passes by. What's the point in wasting time worrying about ageing or anything else for that matter, because none of us know when our time is up, so why leave anything to chance? Living in the moment is a good way to live.

At 50 years of age I no longer stress the small stuff. I celebrate my curves rather than fighting them. I focus my time and energy on the many wonderful things in my life today that I can be grateful for. I enjoy being a wife, helping to keep a lovely home, shopping and cooking for my loved ones, time with friends and family, walking our dog, getting excited about the spring flowers beginning to bloom and early morning rises, where as a younger person I'd often sleep a chunk of the day away.

Being enormously fulfilled in my work and being comfortable in my skin are some of the many things to celebrate in my middle years. I know I'm in a great place because even if I could, I wouldn't change a thing. I am who I am today because of everything that has happened to me in my 50 years living here on planet earth.

I know I'm 50 because birthday cards or any cards with words written in them that express love and appreciation towards me, means more to me than material possessions. Reading through all my cards on our return home made me feel even happier and even more blessed than I already felt.

Just before we went away, knowing we wouldn't be here on my actual birthday, my darling stepchildren presented me with two fantastic gifts. I had already said to many of my friends who had asked me what I wanted for my birthday, that I really didn't need anything at all, but Adam and Zoe still wanted to give their wicked stepmum something to mark this half a century occasion. They both know that I love Sex and The City and that as I've only just recently got into it thanks to Zoe opening my world up even more, I'd missed many of the earlier episodes, so they gave me the complete DVD set, plus a coaster for my cups of hot water that reads, Fifty Eh? That's nothin'. I'm still as fabulously fab and brill as I've always been.

Yes, being 50 is a wonderful thing...And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln

If you want to be even happier in your life or to find out a little more about my work, whether it's coaching you might be interested in, motivational talks or my life enriching courses, email me info@jaynegoldstone.com or ring me on 0191 270 5126