Dealing with sickness is always a large concern for travelers, and is the reason why we visit costly travel clinics, take series upon series of painful injections, and get the lectured over and over again about the dangers of local food and water. Often times, our fears and concerns of a new place grow excessively (过分的 guòfènde) wild, and we neglect the fact that just like our attitudes, our stomaches must adjust to our new environment. I’m not saying throw away your anti-diuretics, and get rid of your immodium because trust me, you’ll need them. Just realize this, there’s a reason why the locals eat all the local food and don’t get sick: they’ve fortified their own Iron Stomaches.

I decided that before we delve into Chinese food (and there is so much of it), I should at least talk a little about acclimating （因应yīnyìnɡ）to that delicious food.

First, I will warn you about drinking water in China. While in Cities like Beijing and Shanghai it has been deemed “safe to drink” by the government, and is most likely sterilized. Four years ago, completely different story (as I had the misfortune of finding out on my second day in Beijing). However, I would suggest drinking bottled water or if you live there, doing what every Chinese citizen does, buy a 5 gallon water cooler. The reason for avoiding tap water is due to the degradation of water pipes and high levels of toxic metals. So save yourself the worry, and stick to water coolers. This is especially convenient and cheap if you live in an apartment. Usually you just call up a number on the empty tank of water, tell them to “请带来一桶水。。。your apartment number” of “please bring one tank of water to…” and within minutes you’ll have a new tank of water all for about 10-15 块。

As for food, let your stomach be your compass. If you don’t like spicy food, well then I wouldn’t suggest a plate of 麻婆豆腐on your first day. If you aren’t a huge fan of meat, maybe avoid 串。But, if you’re like me, and you will try anything once, then by all means, go nuts! Don’t be afraid to try something new and exotic, especially if it’s street food or from some hole in the wall shop. Sure, I know your doctor (that same one who has never been to China) says it’s unsafe, yet people eat it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, everyday, for the entirety of their lives. All it takes is just a little getting used to. After all, did you come all the way to China to eat McDonalds and KFC?

I have only been really sick in China twice, after living there for a combined two years. The first time, as alluded to before, was caused by unsafe drinking water, which could have been easily avoided. So lesson learned. The other time, and the story I often tell to friends and family for a laugh, was caused by pride and one immensely spicy sichuanese “insanity” pepper.

It occurred when I was in 徐州市, looking for a cheap bite to eat. I went to a local noodle place run by recently displaced Sichuanese earthquake survivors. Before me was a massive cauldron brewing with spices I’d never seen before. Being a fan of spicy food, I began talking to the man stirring the pot. He brought out two cups of 白酒 báijiǔ (rubbing alcohol like grain liquor), and after a few toasts of the stuff, I made my rookie mistake. “How hot do you want it”, asked my new 朋友？Without thinking, or maybe just to impress the guy, I used one of my favorite Chinese grammar patterns: “越 + adjective +越好“ or in my case “越辣越好” or “the spicier the better”. He told me that these peppers are some of the hottest in the world, and to demonstrate, pulled a full one out of the pot, tossed it in his mouth, quickly ate and swallowed it, finishing with a grin. He didn’t ask for a drink or shed a tear or appear at all visibly affected. So I repeated my claim, telling him I could handle Sichuanese spicy food, and within minutes had a bowl of fiery death awaiting me.

Now let me preface this with saying that I have always thought myself to have an iron stomach, especially after four years of College and three trips to China. If I’ve seen it, I’ve eaten it and been no worse for the wear after. So I mistakenly thought (以为…) I could eat anything, no matter what it was, and somehow be able to avoid praying to the porcelain gods. I could up until this fateful night.

My first spoonful of soup instantly killed all taste buds, well all but those that could register spice. I became instantly flushed, and started sweating, which I became aware of as 朋友 came over with more 白酒 and a bowl of his own. Glugging the 白酒 in hopes that it would numb some of the pain, and finding only a growing burn, I decided that I wasn’t going to lose face 丢脸, and took to fervently slurping down my bowl of noodles in front of my adoring audience. About half way through the task, I felt to be literally drinking lava, all the while 朋友 was just sitting there nonchalantly eating, drinking and asking me about America. Did he not realize I was in excruciating pain? 2/3rds of the way through, I had had enough gasping, “吃包了，” or “l’m stuffed/full”. I promptly paid and went next door slugging yogurt drink and beer until the burning had subsided somewhat. Little did I know the insanity pepper had just begun it’s all out attack on my body (身体)。

The ingredient in peppers that causes spice or burning is called capsaicin, which interestingly enough is a poison in large doses. I found out this fact within two hours after leaving 朋友’s, when the walls of my hotel room started melting and my brain became 糊里糊涂 （mixed up and in confusion). Over the next two days, I was unable to leave my hotel room, hallucinating, running a fever and feeling the effects of the dreaded 拉肚子 which translates literally as “pull stomach”…yeah I’ll let you figure that one out by yourselves. What did I learn from the experience? One, I’ll never eat one of those peppers ever again in my life. Two, and most importantly, it takes time and patience to build up an “iron stomach”. Ease your way into Chinese food, and you’ll soon find you love it–even the things you thought you’d never eat.

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饺子 jiao3zi (technically pronunciation is jiao2(3)zi3, but the addition of 子 to single-word nouns usually leads to a neutral pronunciation of 子)
面条 mian4tiao2 – noodles
面馆 mian4guan3 – noodle restaurant
饭 fan4 – rice
荤菜 hun1cai4 – meat dish
素菜 su4cai4 – vegetable dish
叫 jiao4 – call, order
外卖 wai4mai4 – delivery food
食堂 shi2tang2 – cafeteria/dining hall
快餐 kuai4can1 – fast food
偷菜 tou1cai4 – lit. steal vegetables. this comes from 开心农场 (kai1xin1nong2chang3 – happy farm, a Chinese predecessor to the popular online game Farmville.

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公寓  gong1yu4 – apartment
窗外 chuang1wai4 – outside the window
城市 cheng2shi4 – city
规划 gui1hua4 – planning
交通 jiao1tong1 – traffic
方面 fang1mian4 – aspect, part
掉头 diao4tou2 – make a u-turn (while driving)
阻挡 zu2(3)dang3 – block, impede
栏子 lan2zi3 – fence
拿掉 na2diao4 – take away, take out
好几辆 – a lot of [vehicle measure word]
车 che1 – car, truck, vehicle

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Bargaining, while not very common place in western society, is a staple of Chinese shopping. While super markets, malls and mega-shopping stores are becoming more common-place in China, street markets, bazaars, expos and old fashion mom and pop stores are still the places to shop when looking for a discounted price or just a way to pass the time. The reason for this is simple: you spend hours walking around, searching a smorgasbord of miss spelled clothing, and slightly used knick knacks for that thing you just have to have–only to spend 5-10 minutes bargaining over a mere 5 kuai (about 65 cents) before it can be yours. Sure, time is money (时间就是金钱), and that’s why you need to hone your bargain skills.

Most foreigner’s I’ve met in China take a while to come around to bargaining, but usually fall in love with it after their Chinese begins to improve. Some, on the other hand, still absolutely hate it and see it as a waste of time…go figure. To be honest, it’s really dependent upon your personality (个性) and your willingness to endure and stay patient（耐心）。You probably will be yelled at (but fear not that’s the way sales works there), likely you’ll have you arm grabbed or your walkway blocked by a excited sales person，and possibly be insulted or threatened…don’t worry all this means you’re doing well.

When I first started street bargaining, I was exhausted within 20 minutes and completely terrified by the hordes of people fervently trying to get my attention. However, I soon realized that with the right skills, vocabulary and patience, I could get anything I wanted for dirt cheap.

Here’s some tricks I found very helpful in the process:

First, never ever show money or have your wallet out until you’re about to pay. This isn’t just to avoid being pick-pocketed, but also shows that you aren’t that interested and maybe are less wealthy than your foreign looks would entail (Often I would tell them “我是大学生，我真的没有那么多前 [I don’t have much money because I’m a college student] or the simpler我是穷人 ［I’m poor]. However, be careful with the last one, making sure your tones and pronunciation are correct, as 穷人 （poor person) sounds similar to 凶人 (monster) when a learning foreigner utters it (This I know from experience and led to many jokes and smiles on my first few trips out on the street markets).

Second, always have a fixed price in your head of what you are willing to spend. This helps for the later bargaining process, because odds are you’re willing to spend more than you can get it for. I’ve heard this as ‘the rule of three’ from other foreigners, meaning, a vendor will often sell you the good three (and sometimes up to six) times what a everyday citizen (人民) would pay for it. Usually I ask for a price, laugh upon hearing it and then either pretend to walk away or say “太贵了，不宰我，给我便宜一下” or “That is too expensive, don’t rip me off, give me a cheaper price”. This will usually lead to a bargaining war which may or may not involve the use of calculators. Stick with the rule of three price, pretend to walk away, or tell them “我会看一看别的东西，可能回来” or “I will take a look at other goods and maybe I’ll return”. This is a devastatingly effective trick （厉害）because a) it will instantly show whether or not the vendor was cheating you out of a price and b) it will tell you if other vendors on the street have the same goods for sale.

Third, if possible bring a “bargain buddy” “谈判朋友” to help you tag team the vendors. The trick is to use vendors against each other, often yelling back and forth to one another in Chinese about who’s offering a better price. If a vendor is refusing to give you a fair price, signal your buddy to come over and in Chinese have them tell you the quality seems bad （质量很底）or that someone else down the street gave him a better deal. It’s not fool proof, but it often works and really helps you practice your Chinese. You can also get group discounts when bargaining, so having one or more buddies around gives you more leverage (影响 yǐngxiǎng) if you’re willing to buy in quantity.

(My 谈判朋友 being assaulted by a 服务员 at Yashow Market. She was much more flexible on price cuts after he agreed to let her touch his foreign hair.)

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煎饼 jian1bing3 – fried pancake
喝粥  he1zhou1 – drink porridge
油条 you2tiao2 – lit. oil stick
豆浆 dou4jiang3 – soy milk
咖啡 ka1fei1 – coffee
麦当劳 mai4dang1lao2 – McDonalds
包子 bao1zi3 – buns
上班族 shang1ban1zu2 – the working people
打卡 da2(3)ka4 – punch in
考勤 kao3qin2 – check attendance

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不懂 bu4dong3 – not understand, to not understand
技术 更 好 ji4shu4geng4hao3 – [his] skill is better. lit. skill more good
卖错 mai4cuo4 – to sell [the incorrect thing]
门禁卡 men2jin4ka3 – keycard for a door, lit. door block card
安全 an1quan2 – safe/safety
__都 __dou1 – in the sentence used, it means “I can’t even get in” or “even I can’t get in”
进不去 jin4bu2(4)qu4 – be unable to enter (lit. enter not go)
不大可能 bu2(4)da4ke3neng2 – not very likely
闲着 xian2zhe1 – rest/lounge around
赔 pei2 – compensate
门锁 men2suo3 – lock

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(Above, a Street Bazaar in Kashgar, Xinjiang Province)

The beauty of the street market is it’s mere simplicity (简易 jiǎnyì): they sell what you need. Be it DVDs, books, food, clothing, trinkets, home décor, jewelry, electronics etc…, it’s all going to be there, and at low, low prices. There’s usually a reason why the goods are so cheap, and aside from nefarious activity, stolen goods or just simple knock offs, the street market offers, at the very least, something to do to pass the time or improve your Chinese.

Most street market merchants are not locals, and usually show up and disappear with the seasons or with available merchandise relating to the seasons, availability or recent trends. Most goods are hand made or knock-off versions of brand name western goods. Still, what you find is entirely up to how far you walk, where you are, and who just happens to be selling goods that day. (For example see the hand woven matchstick preying mantis below.)

While selling goods on the street is technically illegal in most cosmopolitan cities, it is almost always overlooked. In fact, on the block where I lived last year in Beijing, this lack of concern was broadcast multiple times a day–almost like a play or street performance. Usually it would happen like this: The police (警察) would circle the area about ten minutes before actually getting out of their cars and walking over. There presence was known as if to say: Get ready for it. Then, almost like meercats, vendors would pop up from their stops, sound an alarm, and within an instant the various goods would be swept up into blankets and the vendors would hit the pavement. As it turned out, there was an “understanding” between the two groups, often leading to even further discounted prices for the police, and the right to “keep their corner” after the police had done their rounds.

(Above, 王府井小吃，Wangfujing Snack street in Beijing. Notorious for exotic eats. A post relating just to this location [my favorite]  is forthcoming!)

You may ask, well why this back and forth game? This is because down on the street, there are no fixed prices. It’s a dog eat dog world (狗咬狗 gǒuyǎogǒu) out there, and you’re going to pay three to even six times as much as a Chinese citizen for the same goods if you don’t know how to bargain (谈判 tánpàn). That being said, if you play the game right, and scour the street daily, you will be amazed at the things you find.

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Readers, have you experienced a similar phenomenon anywhere else?

理论 li3lun4 – theory
迈克尔杰克逊 mai4ke4er3 jie2ke4xun4 – Michael Jackson
不管在什么地方 bu4guan3 zai4 shen2me di4fang1 – no matter the place [lit. not matter in what place]
不管怎么样 bu4guan3 zen3me yang4  – no matter what [lit. no matter how/what way]
听见 ting1jian4 – to hear (refers to the act of hearing something)
公里 gong1li3 – kilometer
店铺 dian4pu1 – store(s)
中午 zhong1wu3 – noon/noontime
手机 shou3ji1 – cellphone
收音机 shou1yin1ji1 – radio

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From school children to cabbies, random strangers to tour guide members the greeting is awkwardly pronounced, but western specific. Sometimes it would border on the absurd, as in the case where a smiling street-cart (butcher, wielding his massive chop knives, yelled over to me “Hello, foreign meat.” (see caption). Other times, it would be simply out of curiosity, in areas where foreigners are less prevalent. But mostly, it is a common day fact of life, where a cacophony of street vendors 摊贩 [tān fàn] and daily market 市场 ［shìchǎng] vendors assault your eardrums with a loud Hello followed by a naming of every conceivable product under the sun (a later post about street/night markets will follow shortly). However, even the gauntlet of “Hello’s” received from the street pales in comparison to the chorus of school children ecstatic that they now can practice their English greetings.

(A local street vendor, who got my attention by yelling in English: “Hello, American meat! After a few minutes of discussion about Kobe Bryant, we played a game of pool around the corner).

(My class of kindergarteners, who every day upon bathroom break, would walk by waving and screaming HELLO laoshi 老师 or teacher.)

I soon began to realize that the presence and power of “Hello” was really telling of China and the Chinese people, namely indicating genuine curiosity and interest. While maybe tonally off and harshly phrased, it was always friendly and presented with a smile. After exchanging a few words in Chinese, almost ubiquitously, you’d hear a response of 你的汉语不错／你说中文说得很好，that is, your Chinese is not bad/you speak Chinese well, even if you only know a few introductory phrases. It’s not necessarily because you’re Chinese is good (or even that intelligible), but rather, they feel endeared to you because you are trying to speak their language. You are now building up 关系 ［guānxì], that all important, system of networking which makes everything from friendships to business proposals possible, (also the topic of another blog).

Discovering this, I set out to just…well…talk. Every cabbie, person on the subway, street vendor that caught my eye, teacher, student, business man…you name it. I decided to play the smiling American, injecting my phrases of “what’s up friend” 怎么样朋友 [zěnmeyàngpéngyou ].  This phrase will undoubtedly draw attention and maybe even a few confused looks, but that’s a good thing, keep smiling and maybe shift to something tried and true like:

Basketball: 你喜欢大篮球吗？／你看不看美国篮球比赛？ Do you like basketball?/ Do you watch American (NBA) basketball games. This is a good starter for guys because they absolutely love the NBA and love basketball and has never failed to illicit a conversation, and often leads to pick-up games.

Food: I’ve found that almost every person you talk to will know of an amazing place to eat within their neighborhood, even if it’s a hole in the wall, so ask away. 对不起，你可以帮我找到好吃的饭馆？／在你的看发，哪个饭馆有最好吃的反？ “Excuse me, could you help me find a delicious restaurant?/In your opinion, which restaurant has the best food?” You may soon find that your new 朋友 wants to invite you (or even treat you) to a meal.

(Above, fellow 老外，Brian and Bob, enjoy a meal with Mr. Wang, seeing flashing the peace sign. After talking with Wang and his wife at a Carrefour, they graciously invited us to eat lunch with their family. After which, they signed us as English tutors.)

Now, this is an area where cultural differences can lead to miscommunication or hurt feelings. Usually, in the US, when a newly met stranger offers to treat you to a meal, you politely say “No, thanks” and quickly walk-away. In China, always say yes to an invitation to dinner, coffee, wedding, event, whatever, even if you barely know the person. The fact that they invited you means that they trust you, want to learn English or more about Western Culture, and will often use this simple interaction as the basis for a friendship. It’s cavalier and a little uncomfortable first, but you have to play by the cultural norms and 体验中国生活 [tǐ yàn, Zhōng guó shēng huó] he “experience Chinese life firsthand”.

For such a simple phrase, the power of Hello accomplishes so much when living, studying and working in China. It is your secret password or 密码 [mì mǎ] that gains you access into the Chinese community. It’s is that all important first step toward understanding the mindset and mentality of Chinese culture and language.

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After watching a highly dramatized re -enactment of the 四川地震，sìchuāndìzhèn （Sichuanese Earthquake), I was told to stand out in the hall, and wait… I could feel tension building and the atmosphere changing as other teachers began to nervously enter the halls. Within seconds, the quiet linoleum halls were filled with a raucous throng （人群 rénqún）of middle schoolers, yelling, laughing and  darting every which way

Yet, unlike western-centric fire drills, where remaining calm, walking and maintaining order are fundamentals, this fire drill was a lesson in controlled chaos. Children were pushing and shoving, knocking down each other, and slipping as they crammed into the staircases (大批涌入楼梯 dàpī yǒngrùlouti). Even the teachers were running, pushing and redirecting children like pinballs.

As the students exited the building, I began to realize the true size of schools in China (ours had 4000 plus students!). Just when it looked like a stampede would occur, the children miraculously and almost unconsciously, formed in, and fell into perfectly ordered groups (much like a brigade). Soon announcements came from the school VP hailing this fire drill as successful and “the fastest time yet”. Words don’t entirely do this justice, so if interested,check out the videos:

Chinese Fire Drill Part 1

Chinese Fire Drill Part 2

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