Musings of The Mom Jen

24 Hours of Fear and Crying

2014-05-14T09:37:00.002-07:00

There are a lot of things in life that scare me.

Primarily death.

And cancer.

So, when I had to do my mammogram again this year, I of course had about a month where I put it off and then finally made the appointment.

Because, this is just too grownup for me.

I don't like to think about it.

I hate boobs for the very reason mammograms exist.

So I did it.

Then we went on a trip to Las Vegas.

Normally, after a week, you get a letter in the mail that says "your mammogram was fine, see you next year."

OR you get a call that something is up and you need to come back.

I asked while we were away if there were any phone calls, there weren't.

I got home feeling confident that good letter would come.

3 days pass and it didn't come.

Each time the phone rang I would cringe until I saw something random on the caller ID.

I was almost excited to talk to a telemarketer at this point.

Working at the computer on that Wednesday morning, the phone rang and I didn't think anything of it for some reason as I reached to click talk.

My heart stopped as I read the words mammography specialists across the phone's screen.

I heard my voice crack as I said hello and then there was a blur in my memory.

I felt like I was going to faint and I think I even told the person on the other line that.

She told me they needed another look at my right breast.

My robotic voice took over as I felt numb.

Yes, okay. I'll be there tomorrow. Can you give me the address?

I think I said those words.

I clicked off and then dialed my husband's cell.

I remember bawling and not being able to make a coherent statement.

"I'm so scared!" was all I could muster.

The next 21 hours I went back into that numb, robotic state to stay calm for the kids.

I did text and call friends and family and was reassured that this was more normal than it wasn't. I had so many questions but I tried to keep calm.

I slept that night only with help.

Hubby drove me to the appointment and I didn't say a word the drive over.

I remember shaking as I got out of the car and walked up the steps to the office. I wanted to run the other direction...

When my name was called I went back and was given the drill for my rescan. I was somewhat relieved to hear that a doctor would confirm or deny any findings before I left so I wouldn't have to worry any further...or well, you know, worry alot.

I tried to avert my eyes from the screen of my breast scan, I had no idea what I was looking at anyway but if I looked too long I know I'd end up google-ing it later.

I walked to the next room for my ultrasound and the clinician handed me a box of tissue as my eyes were leaking but I tried to hide it.

I stared at the squares on the ceiling trying to decide how to handle any results. I was interrupted by her telling me how she was done and the doctor would now come in and finish up my exam and talk to me about her findings.

I felt the need to vomit at that moment and when the doctor came in I started to sob. "Don't cry, this is normal, it happens more often than not."

And like that, with a few waves of the wand she says, "everything looks good. see you next year!"

I lost it. I cried uncontrollably while she continued to tell me not to.

I thought about the people I know who are not fine and cried for them.

I cried for myself for have been given this pass.

I think I cried for the next 5 hours until I picked up the kids from school.

It seemed to have been the longest day of my life.

I don't want to repeat it.

MALEstones Happening Before My Ears

2013-12-11T11:23:00.001-08:00

It scares me a few times a week.

I'll be in my ~~office~~ bedroom and hear this deep voice talking to DQ.

It's 3:45pm so I know Hubby isn't home.

I vaguely remember setting the 'at home' setting on the alarm, so a burglar isn't talking to my 15 year old.

I shake the cobwebs from my brain and realize yes, that is the deep, hormonal, very masculine voice of my 12 year old son.

That very son who is inching taller over me more and more every day.

That very son who at 2am wakes me from my slumber to again assume a burglar is in our home, but it's really my boy rummaging through our refrigerator.

"I'm starving!"

I don't know if he went to bed and woke hungry or hadn't hit the pillow yet.

That boy has never gone to bed early since infancy.

Just a size and a half away from wearing dad's shoes, this boy is becoming a man.

It's pretty weird for me.

Being a girl and all, I know all the girl changes DQ has gone through and this is more Hubs' territory.

Clothes are now purchased in the men's department.

Socks are smelling pretty rank these days, pits aren't nature's bliss either.

Luckily, the sophomore is giving him skin tips and he's showering regularly, so he's staying pretty hygienic.

He's also in junior high now, and that means he wants to do something I've never let any of the kids do...walk home from school with friends.

This is a toughie letting go of control for sure.

My job as a work at home mom is that I'm available for the kids.

I pick them up from school.

Now the elementary school was two blocks away.

I didn't let them walk...well except for that ONE TIME HE WILL NEVER LET ME LIVE DOWN.

The junior high is over a mile away.

Needless to say, I stalked him on day one....and possibly day 3.

But, he made it home on those days WITHOUT A CELL PHONE as he's now begging for.

Oh these milestones and this growing up thing is just going too fast I tell ya.

I'm aging faster than my hair dye purchases can keep up with.

It's hard letting go.

My Kids are Taller than Me Now (insert ugly cry here)

2013-08-28T15:56:00.002-07:00

Who are these people?

I mean who stole my babies and replaced them with big kids?

Only because she's leaning toward the camera does DQ look taller than My Boy. In fact they are now the same height.

The very height that is 2 inches taller than their mom.

UM WHAT?

Not acceptable.

I'm thinking of giving K coffee for the rest of her life so I can remain taller than one child!

The kids hit another milestone too, one at each level of school, elementary, jr high, and second year high school.

That means big brother isn't walking little sister to my car anymore after school.

Which means the dreaded school pickup line.

Boo.

In that line today I saw cops stopping stupid people doing stupid car pickup line stuff.

I saw people not holding kids' hands walking through the parking lot not around it.

I saw people getting out of their cars to let their kids in while parked in front of the sign that says "DON'T GET OUT OF YOUR CAR!"

It stresses me out.

As I got closer to picking up my baby I scanned the teachers on that dreadful pickup/car line yard duty.

DQ's first grade teacher, My Boy's 3rd and 5th grade instructors....

I got melancholy that they both are too old for K-6 and that little K is my last baby to go to the very school I attended Kindgergarten in.

I got that twingey feeling like I was going to cry.

Time is moving too fast.

I got a call from the high school that my Sophomore can take the practice SAT this year.

Because next year she will start applying to college.

*pulling the needle off a record sound*

College.

That's where I met my now husband.

The father of the kids in that photo up there.

I hear my son is talking about girls.

And not tattling-on-his-sisters-type talking.

K is reading Junie B Jones books to herself and laughing just like her sister did just ~~yesterday~~ a few years ago.

I'm dying my hair like every four weeks now.

They're growing up.

And, I'm growing....grey.

Resurrecting "A Thousand Words Thursday"

2013-05-29T21:45:00.003-07:00

Good grief where has the time gone?

In 10 days I will officially have a 10th grader, a 7th grader, and a 2nd grader.

Whoa.

DQ keeps reminding me how she'll be graduated from high school in 3 years and then I stick my fingers in my ears and say LALALALALALALA really loud and run out of the room.

My son is heading to junior high in which I may pin a spy camera on him and if anyone tries to bully him, I'll drive right over to that campus and give them a piece of my mind.

Oh and K and I are headed to Kauai next week...more on that later.

So I'm bringing ~~SEXY~~ my A Thousand Words Thursday meme back.

Maybe you remember it, photos on Thursday, linky, fun.

No?

Well, head over to The Mom Reviews, that's where it's going to re-launch, resurrect, be reborn if you will.

Get involved.

I'll come see yours if you comment on mine!

http://themomreviews.com/2013/05/29/a-thousand-words-thursday-join-my-weekly-meme.html

Tell a friend.

First My Son with Needles, Now My Baby with Blood

2013-03-29T13:49:00.002-07:00

Spring Break day one and this is how we started the day:

Well....sorta.

It actually started with crying about how sore her wiggly tooth was.

Then the blood came.

Then more tears.

Then the tissue paper wad was soaked with bright red and my little K was not loving it.

She walked into my room and said, "mom, I'm shaky."

I looked at her and realized she was pale.

"I don't like blood."

I don't either honey. Do you feel okay?

"I think I want to throw up."

Okay, do it in the bathroom!

We raced in and she sat down on the floor.

I immediately remembered when my son passed out.

K was mesmorized and frightened by the bloody tissue and I thought she is going to faint.

I grabbed it and flushed it down and told her to relax.

Maybe we should pull out the tooth and be done with it...

"NO! That will hurt!"

The color was coming back to her face and with a couple of tugs on her own, K had the tooth in her hand and her gummy smile was such a relief!

"Let's get donuts to celebrate!"

Well thank goodness for the change in her behavior.

I hope this fear doesn't pop up every time, because two more of her teeth are loose.

I'm thinking pureed ham for her this Sunday.

Sing along with me..."All I want for Easter is my 2 Front Teeth!"

I'll Take Codeine and a Side of Steroids Please

2013-03-06T23:51:00.001-08:00

Can an old lady catch a break?

Ever since I turned 40, I've been sick.

The flu for a week.

Now, bronchitis. For the last week and a half.

Thank god my mammogram report came back normal or I would have thought that this over the hill thing was going to bury me under it.

I already had to cancel a trip to Lake Tahoe, that was tough.

The kids looked forward to snow and lots of it!

We looked forward to a Lake Tahoe winter

My doctor said, "are you kidding, do you want pneumonia?" Thanks bronchitis.

Second round of antibiotics, and inhaler, cough meds with codeine, and now Prednisone.

Steroids...yeah well they say you won't sleep, you will eat a ton, and you'll get puffy.

Sounds like a super solution to my current ailment.

What doesn't kill ya makes you stronger right?

Well, then I should be hitting homeruns in no time.

So many things to look forward to in the upcoming months, I don't have time to be sick anymore.

So do you hear that body?

I know you're all "ooh I'm forty now, I'm going to slough off and get squishy, take that Jen."

You know what body...that's not cool.

I'm going to beat this and I'm going to take care of you and you'll see, you'll be stronger than ever.

You're going to try and get all Honey BooBoo Mom's CHINS on me, and I'm going be all...I don't think so, I'm going to do chin exercises so take that!

Hmm.

I better check the side-effects of all those drugs.

40 So Far: The Flu and Pancake Boobs!

2013-02-10T12:26:00.001-08:00

I had a few pre-40 birthday celebrations and they were fabulous!

A trip to Vegas with my honey, a limo ride wine tasting with friends, dinner and dancing until the wee hours....

THEN the flu hit me.

I thought I was sore and tired from dancing and the wine.

Nope, fever set in and the aches continued.

Then the fever went away and came back for days...through my actual birthday last Wednesday.

That night my mom had planned a dinner out.

I had a 101 fever.

Originally she planned a surprise party then told me about it because she was cancelling it. This because I had planned my own event the weekend before.

Nonetheless, it was going to be the five of us and my parents.

I nearly called to cancel at the last minute and begged my hubby and DQ to tell me if there was any last minute surprises I should expect.

No and nope were the answers.

I barely did my hair, dressed shabbily and headed out the door. I was cold and tired and I'm sure the bags under my eyes could contain my wardrobe.

We walk into the restaurant and are led to the "side room" where larger than 7 people events are held.

I KNEW it, and I looked and felt like crap, and the doors opened to SURPRISE and photo flashes that immediately made my head throb.

Oh the sweetness though of the thought and preparation that my mom and my oldest put into a Hawaii-themed (LOVE) surprise party for me!!

Friends and family hugged though I warned them of my plague.

The night was fun, the food fab, the friends and family the best.

By the end of the night I was feeling better and I passed out when I got home.

It wasn't until Friday where the fever was all gone, and I felt semi-human again.

Now for Monday...

My first mammogram ever and I'm terrified.

Not of the procedure, but of the wait for the results.

My aunt (mom's sister) passed from breast cancer at age 39 back in 1966.

This growing old thing...tiring and scary.

Sometimes I want to be 20 again.

Not a Jump House, but a Jump SLIDE.

2013-01-29T18:45:00.003-08:00

It's birthday week for K and I.

Well more for K, I tend to spend about 3 birthday MONTHS celebrating all that is me.

And, yes I totally deserve it.

That's what my hubby says.

And, I believe everything he says.

He's like the internet, he never lies.

So after the plethora of baseball meetings that are totally cramping my reality TV plans during the evenings this week, the weekend is TIME TO PARTY!

First, it will be all Lalaloopsy up in here with probably close to 400 hundred kids coming to celebrate K's SEVENTH birthday.

Okay, so I invited about 25 kids, and you ~~hope and pray~~ guess about half show up right?!

Nope, not our parties, we invite 25 and 40 come. I'm not sure how that happens, but siblings of kids and neighbors, and even teachers from the school show up. It's a mad house of fun.

To boot, we ordered a jumphouse..and not the box-ed in, dog-pile, WWF kind, it's a SLIDE.

It's going to be like Wipeout for kids.

Just add the 35% chance of rain and all hell may just break loose.

Fab.

I don't know how many more kiddie parties I'm allowed but if this is the last one, they we're going out with a bang.

So then after they deflate the slide and pull the last kid off the plastic, it's my party!

Myself and 13 others are going to stack ourselves into a limo like I did back 3 years ago,
http://www.themomjen.com/2010/02/duh-nuh-nuh-na-nuh-nuh-they-say-its-my.html and we're going wine tasting then to dinner!

OOH it's going to be fun and crazy, and wild and fun.

Did I mention I'm turning 40!

I'm going to try not to take a turn at the jump slide because I can already forsee a broken hip.

BUT, if that slide is still there after wine tasting, anything can happen!

Tooth Fairy Alert: A Special Request

2013-01-08T08:43:00.004-08:00

Hubby and I and 3 other couples just returned from a New Year's-slash-early 40th birthday celebration in Vegas.

I'd tell you what happened, but with that whole "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" pact you make when you get off the plane and all...

It's pretty much top secret.

Or completely boring.

Or completely amazing.

I'll just say no one was tattooed {I think} and there was no tigers in our room and we may or may not have seen Chumlee from Pawn Stars.

Okay. Done.

So we arrive home and drive to meet the family and out jumps my littlest K smiling with THIS FACE:

Holy toledo, the kid can whistle now...or stick a straw right through that gap....or...wait....how many teeth were in that spot?!

I don't know about you, but that is a massive void and the tooth fairy better be on her game because at the last dentist appointment the dentist said her adult tooth is WAY up there.

Like, she wasn't suppose to lose that tooth for another 2-3 months or so.

Like, that adult tooth won't be here for another 4-6 months.

Oh well.

Of course the excitement builds as she anticipates who will be visiting under her pillow that night.

Mom, does the toof {and yes, now she lisps} faiwwy bring other stuff besides money?

Like what do you mean?

Like a suitcase.

Uh, what now?!

{Friend from school} got a suitcase thingy when she lost her tooth.

Like to pack clothes in for a trip?!

NO! Like the one I got with Rapunzel on it with whip gloss in it.

Ohhh! Yes, like a little tin lunch box!

Uh huh! Uh huh! {nodding crazily}

Yeah, no. I'm pretty sure she only brings money.

What's the tooth fairy bring in your neck of the woods?

This is 40: Clothes Shopping

2012-12-30T11:30:00.001-08:00

So my teen wants to shop every day if she could.

I used to be like that when I was her age.

Now it's a struggle.

I'm super indecisive, I have no clue about fashion, and I'm short.

Super short, like 5'1 and that's a stretch, short.

Everything I love in fashion is made for 6 foot amazonian women with no waist, boobs, or butt.

I have the no butt thing ROCKED, but the rest, not so much.

I love floor length sun dresses.

I love skinny jeans.

I love boot cut jeans.

NONE of that looks good on a short person.

None.

It just makes you look shorter, and weird-like.

I love a good heel but then my toes go numb and I walk funny and that look is SO 1987.

SIGH.

So I'm strolling the Hollister Co. store, Gap, Forever 21, Old Navy, H&M following teens around and I want to cry.

Where does a short almost 40 year old shop?

Most things don't fit right, or are too young for me. If it fits right, I look 85 instead of 40.

My mom who was with us is in her 60's and has a million times more style than me.

How does that even happen?

She's super hip too.

I mean we walk into Hot Topic and the music blaring on the stereo is a song SHE KNOWS.

I turn around and look to see who's singing and it's GRANDMA.

HOW do you know this song that's playing in this skater/goth/hip/ clothing store?!

Duh, it's "I Got You Babe." my mother tells me.

Okay it's a cover, but wow.

This is 40 huh?!

Clothes don't look good, I'm getting a neck thing my 6 year old likes to call a GOBBLE, and my 60-something mom is cooler than me.

Fab.

Mama and Her Ducks

2012-12-28T13:10:00.001-08:00

Wow, my babies are growing up.

Which One is More Weird? Christmas Gift Edition

2012-12-14T09:38:00.003-08:00

Last year my oldest learned a lesson the hard way.

I tell my kids Be Careful What You Wish For.

This year it happened again, but it wasn't a birthday gift exchange, it was for Christmas and it's even more weird.

So my 6 year old must have told her friend she likes deer.

I don't know if it was in passing, related to reindeer, or she was reading a book about deer, but K's little classmate came over and brought her this yesterday:

Oh, what is it you ask?

A deer's antler.

Duh.

From this girl's backyard.

Where apparently it has been sitting for 12 years.

And, there were a lot more too.

K wasn't home at the moment, but I stood there in front of this girl and her mom and I was speechless, mouth agape, and there were a lot of seconds of silence.

The mom tells me that K told her daughter she wanted a deer's antler for Christmas and she happened to have one.

So the right thing to do was for her to wrap ribbon around it and give it to K.

The mom just washed it with soapy water, so it smelled.

But, not of soapy water.

It smelled like....

...dead deer with a hint of soap.

Or wood.

SOOOOO K gets home and sees it under the tree.

So you like deer I ask.

Um, I didn't say I wanted it for Christmas.

Well {Mia} said you did and here it is.

Oh.

Be careful what you wish for!

She stood there just as I did by the door, kinda shocked, baffled.

I'm still trying to decide what is more weird. That my first grader is asking for deer antlers for a gift.

OR if the person she told had one to give her.

Mind. Blown.

Mama Wants to Jam

2012-12-12T21:29:00.000-08:00

Aren't there days when you just want to get your groove on?

Sure maybe a few glasses of wine help, but let mom put on some tunes and rock out if she needs to.

After days of making lunches, driving here and there and everywhere so the kids have scouts and dance and baseball and soccer and and and...

Mom deserves a night in...to dance...and drink wine...and have some fun.

Then we have that responsible teen saying, "mom, I need to go to bed."

And, the six year old asking, "is it time for bed YET?"

And the husband just sitting there asking, "when can we watch Survivor?"

SERIOUSLY.

You guys are a ball of fun, and by fun I mean a ball of boring.

SIGH.

Sigh again.

It's a Wednesday, I get it.

Work and school tomorrow.

I totally understand.

But, COME. ON.

Music heals the soul and yes I know all the words to "Things That Make You Go HMMM..."

And, "Baby's Got Back..."

And, "Funky Cold Medina..."

And, "Landslide" by the Dixie Chicks originally sung by Stevie Nicks.

Sometimes mama just wants to hear her jams.

And dance.

Silly-like.

And, seriously I get reprimanded.

I'm on the computer reduced to listening music with earphones in my own house.

I'm an adult.

"MOOOOOOMMMMM, turn it DOOOOWWWWWNNNN!"

Seriously.

Ppppplllltttt!

Family Photos Courtesy of #DisneyHolidays

2012-11-21T13:56:00.000-08:00

So it's that time of year again.

Time to pull out the stretchy pants to make room for those turkey and pie pounds.

Oh and it's Christmas Card attempt time too.

Last year I had a fabulous Christmas photo that I posted here on the blog.

But, I never mailed them.

Seriously I have about 50 or so floating around the house.

I may have left one for my mailman and gave one to the checker at Safeway, but other than that, no one saw the unbelieveable cuteness.

Well except for you guys. I think.

So this year I had a plan.

No plan.

Just get a quick shot, throw it in black and white and let the decor from some printing company make it look good.

This is how that turned out....

I know, teenagers!

Luckily our fabulous trip to Disneyland and California Adventure was coming up, and maybe I'd just get one good one.

Aaaand, this is how that went...

and...

Who closes there eyes the ENTIRE time at Space Mountain?? Me, it scares me. And makes me a little nauseous.

DQ knows where all the cameras are on those rides now, she plans it. K, she's apparently not phased by the darkness, speed, or thrill of it all.

SO.

Still looking for that special opp.

How about here at Cars Land?

Oops, no dad.

How about here in Downtown Disney...

No dad or DQ.

How about now...

Good gracious, 3 of us missing.

Nope, that isn't me, it's Minnie.

For the love of Disney....What is it going to take?

No parents, but I'm calling it, success.

I'll Take 2 New Jobs for Free, Alex!

2012-11-15T09:35:00.001-08:00

Did you get my game show humor?

So yeah, I'm that girl who can't say no.

I took on a few new positions in my community for no pay.

I'm really not complaining.

It's really rewarding.

I know this because people keep telling me it is.

And, I believe everything I hear.

So I work with my younger two kids' PTO.

Mostly because my girlfriends are on the board and it means I get to hang out with them.

I...mean...mostly because it's rewarding for the kids.

No, really.

Well, I think it is, they just don't realize it yet.

So I get to count See's Candy fundraiser money, work in the student store, help with vision/hearing screening, work at the Book Fair, and did I mention hang with my friends?!

I do love it, and at the moment, it's better than working in our OVERCROWDED classrooms that stress me out after my 75 minute stint every other week.

You know I was a teacher back in the day when the ratio was 20-1 in K-3 grades.

Well now it's 34-1 and my kids' poor teachers are frazzled and I honestly think they're saints sent from heaven.

My other non-paying job is for our Little League baseball board.

I'm the League Information Officer.

Sounds super fancy and legit.

So I post info on Facebook and try to keep up with their website.

I can do that.

I think.

One of my PTO friends' hubby is helping me and he's really good at it, so I may pay him off in coffee and golf balls to just do it all because clearly I can't say no, the meetings are long and unfortunately none of my close friends are involved.

SIGH.

Okay seriously, I appreciate all the work that goes into the school PTO and the Little League boards. Over the years I've reaped the benefits how things have gone so smoothly for my kids and their activities.

I know why.

It's thanks to people like me.

Who don't get paid.

But, do it for the love of their kids.

So yeah, it is rewarding.

Go me!

*lightbulb moment*

Where Nearing 40 is FOWL!

2012-10-15T21:52:00.000-07:00

Do you ever catch a glimpse of yourself and go, WTF?!

Looking straight on in the mirror, I don't see it.

In my bathroom, I have this super-glass that makes me look good.

Then I get in natural sunlight.

I catch myself in my iPhone backwards camera.

Or I see a picture of myself and go, ummm WHAT IS THAT?!

Case in point...

Yes, I know.

My hair looks fabulous.

That's not what I'm talking about here.

Sure, I'm making a dorky face.

That's normal. I can't smile for the camera, ever.

But, what the frack is that gobbly turkey crap going on with my neck?

Where did that come from, I don't remember that being there.

And, why didn't anyone mention it?

Man, pushing 40 is taking a toll.

First my locks are turning 50 shades of gray!

I can't go more than 4 weeks without dying my roots, that shit is outta control.

Help.

No seriously.

Now this neck-a-ma-bob.

It's close to Thanksgiving, I do not want to be mistaken for the main dish!

I Can't Deal with Sickos

2012-09-20T15:39:00.000-07:00

There are some things I cannot deal with.

Like illness.

I mean, I deal with it. But, I can't deal with it.

Makes perfect sense right?

When I was blessed with children, that non-existent handbook left out a very important chapter...

Dealing with sick kids.

So like ~~any mom~~ paranoid moms like me, I panic first then act sane.

Okay I totally never act sane. But, stay with me.

So when my first-born got ear infections every other month for the first 2 years of her life and was put on antibiotics for 2 years, I worried incessantly.

Then when my second child never slept for 8 months thanks to colic, I was given the label of having post-partum depression.

Earlier this year while on vacation, my youngest got sick while staying with grandma and papa.

Two visits to the doctor in a week, 4 days of fever, and 2 shots in the tushy later I stressed and was not relaxed one bit on that vacation.

BTW, that same vacation just mentioned, my husband was in bed for 24 hours with a fever and bronchitis. I wanted to go home and cry.

From HAWAII, who does that?!

As for me, I both fear and crave the doctor.

Fear because, duh I fear the worst if someone sniffles.

Crave because I just need that validation that I've overreacted and I NEED someone with a doctorate tell me to stop using GOOGLE and WEB MD.

A few weeks ago we heard of a local youngish man who dropped dead of a heart attack leaving 4 young kids and a wife.

My husband who doesn't crave doctors like I do told me, "I need to get a physical!"

Good, but scary in my mind.

In addition to the basics, I urged him to mention some skin "things" to the doctor.

He is a freckly boy, his mom has dealt with skin cancer, and there were just some spots that needed extra attention.

Coming home from this appointment, his forehead was littered with bandaids and he repeatedly said he smelt burning flesh.

I felt numb that week we awaited, or rather dreaded a call from the doctor that meant something was wrong.

Thankfully, no call. No news, good news.

But, the cycle never ends.

Kids, parents, spouses get sick and I try and restrain myself from looking up symptoms and making my own diagnoses.

I've even printed out a saying I saw today because it NEEDS to be my mantra.

sometimes you just have to stop worrying, wondering, and doubting. have faith that things will work out. may not be how you planned, but just how they're meant to be.

Do you panic, jump to conclusions, or freak...or are you a cool cucumber.

If it's the latter, teach me how!

Stories from High School: Mouthing Bad Words

2012-09-11T16:05:00.001-07:00

I'm embarassed to admit it.

But, I called a random high school student a not so nice word.

Okay, I mouthed it.

That is totally better.

She was in her car.

A BMW.

Probably her moms.

It has a lovey dovey vanity plate.

Initial, initial, initial HEARTS initial, initial, initial.

Aw.

Anyway, so I'm in the high school parking lot.

Oh yeah, DQ is in high school!

HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?

Oh right, after 8th grade graduation, then you start as a Freshman...yada yada.

Just letting those know who aren't paying attention.

So yah, she's in high school.

I still pick her up via car in the school lot.

Walk home a half mile, NEVAH!

Maybe when she's 30.

Anyway, so the line to get out of the parking lot is chaotic about 3 days out of 5 and today was day 1.

I'm trying to inch my way into the flow line when the BMW in question keeps coming, keeps coming, and pretty much will hit me if she doesn't stop.

So being the ADULT, I stop and she inches by then has to stop right in my line of sight through the tinted windows.

She looks my way and I mouth an obscenity.

It slipped out. Sorta.

Out of anger.

Out of frustration, I've been waiting and allowing 5s and 10s of cars go by, then I see a chance and take it.

Nope, this girl has no plans to pay attention to anything around her and wants to play chicken with me.

She blatantly persisted and would have totally hit me.

I blame the heat, but you know what she deserved that little foul mouthage.

She was totally rude.

Being rude back is not the answer no, but sometimes you just react.

So she turned her head and shrugged her shoulders.

Ugh.

From that point on I allowed 2 pedestrians and 2 more cars go by in front of me.

I'm not proud of my reaction.

I told my daughter and her friend in the car about manners when you drive.

I hope they remember that when they get their licenses. (gasp)

Oh and not to cuss at bad drivers even if it's not out loud.

Were your buttons pushed today?

A Walk in SWEATral Park

2012-08-28T13:23:00.004-07:00

Central Park is stunning.

And huge.

We walked 2 hours.

Over 4 miles.

And maybe we hit about 1/8 of it.

It was August.

It was 90 degrees.

Plus 90% humidity.

At one point I felt like the next step would be death.

My sweat did not glisten any longer, it reflected my last moments of life.

Just two more blocks.

My husband is a funny man.

I was not amused.

I made it through that day.

Barely.

How do people live in humidity. Please explain it to this California girl.

The New York Subway System? We Totally Rocked It!

2012-08-10T11:08:00.001-07:00

Okay minus one trip from JFK airport to the hotel, we did ride in a towncar. BUT, after that we exclusively rode the New York Subway system or walked.

Hubby and DQ were with me, they were my confidence. Had I traveled alone to the Big Apple, I may have hailed a taxi to get places and probably would have paid a ridiculous amount of money to go 3 blocks.

Nope, not us.

Not one single taxi ride the whole time.

The Subway is ridiculously inexpensive and amazingly efficient.

Sure on a 90 degree day in the summer it literally feels like you are walking into the depths of hell down two or 3 levels underground.

Sure it smells like pee, vomit, and other bodily fluids down there.

Sure you feel like you could be mugged at any minute.

Sure when you take it back to the airport with all your luggage you feel like you will fall down the stairs and die.

Sure falling into the tracks and getting plowed by the train goes through your mind.

Sure you hold your breath when your husband says, "we're under a river right now!"

BUT, did I mention cheap. And efficient.

We rode to Yankee Stadium on the Subway.

Battery Park.

Chelsea.

Lincoln Center.

Ground Zero.

Hubby and DQ took it to the Brooklyn Bridge just before they walked across it.

They even TRANSFERRED from one line to another.

Pros I tell ya, we're pros.

Plus there's A/C in there.

Maps to help you find your way.

Even the cleaner and newer trains talk to you so you know where to get off.

We didn't drive or ride in a car for almost 5 full days.

That's big for these Californians!

Now I feel all fancy when I tell people, "oh sure, the E train takes you all the way to blabbity blah" and "if you transfer from the S to the R you'll be smack dab in hoobity hoo."

How do you get to JFK? Well you take the E to the Jamaica AirTrain goobledy goo.

Yep, pros.

Finding "Friends" in New York City

2012-08-09T18:49:00.000-07:00

How YOU doin?

We were on a BREAK!

Regina Phalange, PHALANGE!

Can I BE wearing anymore clothes?!

I KNOW!

Okay, so you get my point, we're fans of the show Friends.

Like literally watch whenever its on.

DVR reruns.

Quote the show at inappropriate times.

Refer to the actors as, "oh that's Chandler" instead of Matthew Perry.

Sometimes we even say things like, "oh she totally runs like Phoebe."

Fans or addicts?

Normal or creepy obsession.

The latter on both, I'm sure.

So to excite us even further, when we toured NYC's TV and Movie sites last week, DQ, hubby, and I stopped and photographed the actual building where they shot all the exteriors for Friends.

No. that's not really Central Perk, it's actually called "The Little Owl" restaurant on Bedford and Grove.

Even us fanatics know the sets were created and are at the Warner Brother's lot in LA.

I think.

A Tale of the Third Row

2012-07-10T16:40:00.000-07:00

For the past 3 weeks, we've been living out of the car.

With late night baseball practices and 2-3 games a week, we were never home.

Luckily we have a 7 seater vehicle.

Yes, there's only 5 of us, but everyone needs their space.

The tween won't sit next to the teen in the middle row.

That leaves the 6 year old with the whole 3rd row to herself.

And, believe me, no one wants to....nor is able to sit next to her.

This photo is after a bit of cleaning.

This photo may be a health code violation, so squint when you look at it.

I would have loved to endure burnt legs on hot summer leather seats over the uncleanable stained cloth seats.

Seriously, when we turn a corner, things jingle and jangle and thump in that third row.

My baby is like a homeless grocery cart pusher with a home and no cart.

All of her stuff is back there.

Plus a whole lot of other garbage she collects on the way.

She's messy, doesn't like to clean up...and I think there may be a science experiment growing out of an old milkshake cup back there.

She can't find her shoes, her sweatshirt is always damp, and there are enough fries back there to survive a natural disaster if need be.

Yeah. I'm raising Pigpen.

But, it's generally quiet back there.

The DVD player is on, she is happily munching on something or another, I'm sure there's one type of liquid drink back there for her that hasn't expired.

Car trips have been a breeze lately.

Good thing my teen has a compulsive cleaning habit, so the car will be sparkly in no time now that all-stars are over.

So does anyone know where we can rent a HazMat suit?

.

All-Star Baseball Widow

2012-06-19T10:08:00.001-07:00

Two years ago my son had the honor of being asked to play in All-Stars for baseball.

A group of boys that were voted on my coaches and peers to play in an elite tournament at the end of the regular baseball season.

It was an honor.

That we had to turn down.

We plan our seasonal end-of-the-year-beginning-of-summer trip during that time and well, if you don't show up, of course you can't play.

As boys got older and skill levels more competitive, last year he did not make a team. So away we went on vacation.

This year, though he struggled the first half of the season he ended up doing really well in the next level of little league, "the Majors!"

Combining his new confidence, skills, and overall pleasant temperment, he made the 11 year old all-star team this year!

So excited, so proud, Hubby was even asked to help coach this group of great kids.

Our travel plans are working around the schedule, perfect right?

Well, now that Hub works out of town, our days go like this:

6:30am-Hub leaves for work
5:45pm-Hub comes home from work
6pm-Hub and Son head to practice
9pm-Hub and Son come home

Yah.

Every day.

For two weeks, even Saturdays.

Crazy long days.

And, I bet my husband is feeling them too. (smirk)

Our first game is this weekend, so hopefully this crazy hard working practice pays off.

And, maybe we'll have a home-cooked family dinner together soon.

Maybe.

The End of Elementary School.

2012-05-29T09:35:00.001-07:00

After today, only five school days left.

Five days of elementary school, then it's over.

High school bound.

My oldest will head to Great America theme park this week to celebrate with the eighth grade class.

She will spend her last days with her favorite group of friends, some of which will be heading to different schools in the fall.

Memories of youth behind her as she grows into a young woman.

Scared to start anew.

Excited to start anew.

Sad to miss those friends.

Eager to meet new ones, I think.

Where did the time go?

She just graduated from Kindergarten!

No, wait, that's K.

Now an eighth grade graduate.

Wow.

I'm so proud of my girl.

She's beautiful, smart, and so precious.

I love the woman she's becoming.

I just don't want her to grow up so fast.

Baby Talk from my Baby.

2012-05-22T13:35:00.000-07:00

The past few nights have been late ones.

Late ones like we were out of town for a baseball game.

Dance and dinner ran late.

The yewzh.

Everyone was cranky and tired and over-tired and super cranked.

The whining was abundant.

A bumped head out of crankdom made bath time a cryfest.

Oy.

Finally, my youngest calmed down enough to request her nightly book reading and tuck in.

She lays in the bottom bunk, story is read, kisses are given then lights out.

Tonight I needed more after all the emotion.

"Lay with me here on the couch and we'll read."

SIGH okay.

I read her book for the night which is like an encyclopedia, she finally tells me...

Stop there, I'm tired.

"Please, how about we cuddle on my bed?"

...stomp stomp OHKAY!

As we climb into my bed I rub her back and she lets out a "MAMA" in complete baby talk style.

Sounded like one of those baby doll back in the day when you pulled the string on their back they cried Mama!

I giggle.

She giggles.

Her giggles make me giggle more.

Giggles amplify in the room until we're delirious.

Just a few minutes later she's asleep on top of me in my bed.

Oh these moments, I want to bottle them up before they're gone forever!