Brodi Ashton

Launch Party by the Numbers: because it's a tradition

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 23:14:00 +0000

Firstly: The winner of the Everneath Prize Pack is: Tara Turner

Please email me your mailing address: brodiashton at gmail dot com

On to the post!

Hey y'all. Since it's become a defining feature on the blog, I thought I'd share a rundown of the Everneath Launch Party by the Numbers:

Number of people in attendance at the launch party- 220

Number of hours I signed for: 2.5

Number of essential items I forgot: 2
1- my own copy of the book to read from 2- my special red pens to sign with (I shopped for them all day. I ended up signing with a purple pen.)

Number of times I called someone "Rachel" who's name was in fact not "Rachel": 2 (King's English has a lot of Rachel's!)

Here's one of the Rachel's introducing me. I love her.

Number of typos in my power point presentation: 2

Number of times I said the word "nipple" in my presentation: 4

Number of times my mom hoped I would say the word "nipple" in my presentation: 0

Number of bad pictures in a row my hubby took of me: 9

Open those eyes, Brodi.

No wait, try again.

This one's my favorite. I'm so bored, I'm sleeping.

Could I BE any happier?

I'm scared. The woman in the front row has a gun.

Constipated? Yes, please.

Remember that part where I tried to eat the microphone?

I'm thinking of a funny joke inside my head.

A little to the left, raise your chin more... yep. Now I can see straight up your nostrils.

Number of times I messed up on signing my own name: 2 (What is it that makes me forget the "r" in Brodi?)

Number of times I ripped the title page of the book when I was trying to remove the post-it note: 1

Number of times I've typed the words "thank you" in the past 48 hours: 548

Number of people I have left to thank: countless

Thank you again, everyone.

EVERNEATH Launch Party: An Initial Recap

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 21:06:00 +0000

Hey y'all. I'm finally starting to unwind from the big launch party. I can't believe how many people showed up, and packed the art gallery next door to my local indie bookstore, the awesome King's English.

I thought I'd just show you some wonderful pictures, taken by my friend Michelle Sallay. (Also, she is giving away a signed copy of Everneath on her blog).

First off, here are pics of the crowd from several angles. I was so overwhelmed by the support from the community, friends and family! The staffers counted over 200 in attendance.

I did my first ever power point presentation. We were only into the second slide when I came across my first typo.

It read:

THIS IS MY FIRST POWER POINT PRESENTATION.

I all grown up now.

Yep. I all grown up now.

I signed books for over two hours straight. The King's English sold out of books early in the evening. Thank you so much to everyone who braved the crowds and stood in line!

My awesome family (who considers it their divine mission in life to feed the masses) made the best treats which helped make the wait more pleasant.

photo taken by Eden Ellingson

And King's English got this awesome cake:

photo taken by Eden Ellingson

I almost hated that they had to cut into the pretty!

Here are some more pics of the event, again taken by Michelle Sallay:


This is my critique group, THE SIX minus me. They are wearing DEAD ELVISES t-shirts. From l-r: Sara Bolton, Valynne Nagamatsu, Kim Reid, Bree Despain and Emily Wing Smith.

My sweet parents, holding my book. Doesn't my dad look great?!

Me signing.

Thank you to everyone for all of your support. People ask me how I'm handling everything, and I tell them I'm handling everything fine, until I think about all the people I have to thank. Then I become overwhelmed.

If you were at the party, what did you think?

And if you weren't, did you know you can order signed copies of EVERNEATH from The King's English?

Also, I will announce the winner of the Pre-order contest tomorrow. :)

On EVERNEATH Eve, I am feeling Reflective

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 17:21:00 +0000

First things first: Check out this contest that Waterstone's in the U.K. is doing. Anyone can enter, no purchase or hoop-jumping necessary, and you could win the dress from the cover of EVERNEATH! Isn't that cool?

Second things second: My main character Nikki gave an interview over here. That playful little minx! I didn't know she could do these things without my knowledge!

Thirdly, EVERNEATH comes out tomorrow. Tomorrow!! I know some of you have already seen it in stores (and if you have, tweet me a picture!) but it's out officially tomorrow.

This is causing me to do something I rarely do: Reflect. I can't help it. I print up all of my rejection letters in preparation for the launch party tomorrow, and the next thing I know, I'm reflecting.

All those people who thought my book wouldn't sell. And trust me, there is a stack of them.

I check out the dedication in the book:

To: my dad.
A quiet man.
A fierce warrior.

And I can't help but remember there were many people in the past four years who told me he wouldn't live to see my book on shelves.

*HIGH FIVES, DAD*

I read over the acknowledgements page, which I'll share with you now, because there are so many people besides me who are behind this book:

Brace yourselves: this is going to be long. It takes a village to raise a novel, and this book owes its existence to one giant, crazy village.

First off, a big sloppy kiss on the cheek to the folks at DGLM, especially my agent Michael Bourret who is one half advocate, one half shrink, and the other third kindred soul. Thank you for seeing the beauty in the beastly draft that I sent you, and for talking me down from the ledge on a regular basis. And for loving tennis just as much as I do. Added kisses for Lauren Abramo and her stellar work abroad on behalf of Everneath.

Next, high fives all around to the entire team at Balzer+Bray and HarperCollins. Special thanks to Sara Sargent and my editor Kristin Daly Rens, who fell in love with the story of Everneath months before it was even submitted. You taught me to never stop asking questions and digging deeper. The Everneath came to vivid life because of you. Also thanks to the many people behind the scenes, including even more editors, copy editors, and the enthusiastic sales, design and marketing teams.

Slaps on the bums (football-team style) for my writing group The SIX (aptly named because we are all six feet tall) Bree Despain, Emily Wing Smith, Kimberly Webb Reid, Valynne Maetani Nagamatsu, and Sara Bolton. Without your brilliant critiques, endless readings of crappy drafts, and emergency runs to In-n-Out, this book would be a flaming pile of goo.

Hugs all around for friends who have helped me through the madness of trying to get a book published, either by reading early drafts or providing emotional support and chocolate: Amy Jefferies, Diane Adair, Anne Petty, Matthew J. Kirby, Alissa Owen, Raina Williams, Debbie Lambson, Jenni Elyse, Robin Weeks, Karin Brown, Amy Weech, and especially Dorien Nielson, who read the earliest version, when it was only twenty pages long and I was getting it ready to be critiqued at a conference.

Thank you to Martine Leavitt and the rest of my WIFYR 2009 workshop group for their insights. Thank you to many more blog friends, Twitter friends, real-life friends, and book bloggers who have watched my journey from the beginning, and have thrown their enthusiastic support behind this book. You know who you are!

Chest bumps to my extended families, including Frank and Kathleen, the Johnsons, the Otts, the Jacksons, the Ellingsons, and the other Johnsons, and endless nieces and nephews who also were subjected to early drafts. Special thanks to Eden Ellingson, who gave me the idea to write a book in the first place.

A noogie on the head for my sister Erin, who shouted the praises of crappy first drafts, and was ready with a pair of brass knuckles for anyone who thought differently. I'd want you on my side of any battle! Extra noogies for her husband, Dave.

A kiss on the forehead for my mom and dad, who raised me to believe I could do anything, and celebrated every step of the journey, from false starts and rejections to that magical day when I got THE CALL.

A pinch on the cheek for my boys, Carter and Beckham, for reminding me there is life outside of my books.

Most of all, a smack on the kisser for Sam. You never let me give up. You believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. You are the best man I know. It’s you and me against the world. Love you.

Lastly, I want to thank all of you blog readers - lurkers and frequent commenters - for accompanying me on this journey. Today, I'm just filled with love and gratitude and I don't know how to repay everyone. I'm always searching for words, but right now there are none.

Except THANK YOU.

Kid B Packs his Essentials, and Your Chance to Win an EVERNEATH Prize Pack

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 18:45:00 +0000

Hey, yo.

Things are about to get EVER-FREAKY around here, mostly because my book comes out in 4 DAYS!!

I am EVER-excited, and to prove this, I'm going to put "EVER" in front of every single adjective!

Okay, just kidding.

Sorry for the sporadic blog posting this week and last, but I've been on a cruise. Sam didn't want me to mention it until after we were back, because he was nervous that burglars religiously follow my blog, just waiting for the moment I mention that we're going out of town.

So, for all of you religious burglars out there: BAZINGA! You've just been EVER-BAMBOOZLED. Ha HA!

When we told Kid B that he was going on a cruise, he promptly found a suitcase and packed everything his 6-year-old mind thought he would need. Here's what it looked like:

I case you can't tell from the picture, that there is a suitcase full of:

1 standard issue pencil box, filled with crayons

4 multi-colored Yoshi's

1 very angry bird (whose talents include destroying wood. Perfect for a cruise.)

1 paper punch in the shape of a tiger

1 industrial sized tape dispenser

1 roll of heavy duty packing tape (I assume for if the ship springs a leak)

The bottom is just made up of stacks of paper. Because that's the one thing you can't get everywhere.

He zipped it all up and headed for the door. Sam had to break it to him that we weren't leaving for another 24 hours. The Yoshi's were not impressed.

I'll tell you all about my trip later, but first I had to show you what was on my doorstep when we got home:

And I want to celebrate. Would you like to win a personalized copy, complete with autograph, from my own personal stash? Along with some EVERNEATH swag like temporary tattoos, a guitar pick necklace, and signed bookmarks?

That, my friends, is what the people-in-the-know call a PRIZE PACK!

Here's your chance to win it. All you have to do is pre-order my book, and you're entered to win! Now, I know some of you are thinking, "But if I pre-order her book, and then I win... won't the space-time continuum implode?"

Wait, that wasn't what you were thinking? Oh. Then maybe you were thinking you'd end up with two books.

And I say... what's the problem? Double the fun! Do you have a friend who has a birthday ever? This would be perfect! How about a holiday that shows up once a year? Excellent.

So, pre-order my book from places like Books A Million or Barnes and Noble or Indiebound or anywhere else, and then leave me a comment telling me you pre-ordered the book, and you're entered! Just make sure you include where you ordered it from, your confirmation number, your credit card number and your social security number, along with your mother's maiden name.

Again, I jest. There's no real way for me to tell if you're lying. So, we are making a gentlemen's agreement. But just for fun's sake, tell me where you ordered it from. :) And if you already pre-ordered, EVER-thank you! And yes, that counts too.

Okay! That's it! And again, don't forget that everyone's invited to the launch party at The King's English on Tuesday at 7:00 p.m.

*I should've mentioned that this contest will end on Tuesday, January 24th at midnight.*

**I also should've mentioned that it counts if you're going to buy your copy from King's English on the night of the launch. Plus, this option will also give you a warm fuzzy feeling because you supported your local indie bookstore. And we all know warm fuzzies attract a lot of luck in a random drawing. **

German book trailer for EVERNEATH (Fixed)

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:00:00 +0000

I'll tell you right now, blogging will be a little sporadic this week. I'm a bit in recovery mode after my revisions and resting up for the big book release, which is in nine days, which is so crazy!

But while I'm here, I thought I'd share the German book trailer for EVERNEATH. I think it has a very romantic and cool feel to it. Let me know what you think! And again, I wish I spoke German.

Okay, Okay. I get it. There's no link! Here's a link. Or better yet, here's the video. I think.

How I Tought Kid C the Similarities between a Cruise Ship and a Naked Woman

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 23:54:00 +0000

Hey ya'll!

So, we're going on a cruise in the distant future. I've never been on one. I'm so excited because this combines my fear of enclosed spaces with my fear of the open water for an exciting cocktail of crazy.

Sam is very excited to see what wonderful sides of my personality this experience will bring out.

I was trying to explain to Kid C what a cruise ship will be like.

me: "We're going to stay on a boat with like hundreds of other people!"

him: "That sounds crowded."

me: "But the boat is huge!"

him: "Where will we sleep?"

me: "In our own room. Like a hotel room. But it floats!"

him: "That doesn't sound very safe."

I glanced at the television guide, which happened to be showing TITANIC. Now before you think this can't turn out well, I also noted that the movie had just started, so there was no way it could be to the scary sinking part yet.

So I'm all, "Kid C! Get over her. You are going to see what a cruise ship loos like."

I flip the channel, and front and center on the screen is this:

Only it didn't cut off. It panned from left to right, showing the whole enchilada, if you know what I mean. Do you know what I mean? (boobs.)

So to poor kid C, I was all, "Watch the big screen, son. This is what a cruise is!!!" Cue naked woman! "There. Does that clear the whole 'hotel... but on the water' confusion?"

I immediately shut the tv off, which was probably worse, because it resembled one of those flashes that become ingrained in your brain.

Kid C: "Was that a naked woman?"

me: "No! It was a... boat. You saw a naked woman? That's weird."

Yes, I like to take the coward's way out.

15 More Days... Launch Parties, Revision Woes, and the need for Burned Flesh Factoids

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 17:42:00 +0000

So, I have a revision deadline for the latest version of EVERNEATH 2: It's Everneath-ier on Wednesday.

This means I'm going through the draft right now, and coming across highlighted words. Stuff I didn't want to figure out right then, but needed to come back to later.

Sometimes I'd be in the middle of a really tense scene, or even worse, a romantic scene, and I'd turn the page only to find this:

blah blah blah... leading up to big kiss *smooch*

Here are examples of my favorite highlighted reminders:

Blah blah blah... add description (Yeah, this one comes up about once a page)

------- word for hand thingee? -------(I don't know, could it be a glove?)

------ word for leather thing that can old a knife? ------ (Okay, obviously the word "sheath" wasn't coming to me)

------ do "concentric" circles go outward or inward?---------

what else can he do with his hand, besides run through hair? (I ask myself this question every day. *she said as she ran her fingers through her hair)

-----need transition here: Aaaaaaannnnnnnndddddd... scene!-------------

--- note: what does burned hair smell like?-----

--- note: if you tear off sleeve, will burned flesh come with it? -------

And my personal favorite:

--- say it again, but better---

EVERNEATH comes out in 15 days. The launch party will be at The King's English bookshop in the 15th and 15th area of Salt Lake City.

When: Tuesday, January 24th, 2012
Where: King's English
Time: 7:00 p.m.
Treats?: Of course

Everyone is invited, so mark it down on your calendars so I don't look like an idiot up there at the microphone, speaking to an audience of Sam and my mom.

I practiced my speech on Sam the other night. He had one thing to say:

"I'm not sure it's appropriate to talk about your hatred for faulty epidurals in your book launch speech. In fact, we could probably leave Kid C's birth story out."

Looks like it's back to the drawing board.

So, who's coming to the launch party? And who can answer the question about the burned skin?

The TOP TEN things my kid says to me to keep me grounded

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 16:00:00 +0000

The other day, I did a TOP TEN list on Twitter, and I got a couple requests to do it as a blog post, because of all the people not on the twitter. (I'm looking at you, Dorien).

So, since I have a book coming out in 17 days (17 DAYS!!), sometimes my head is in the clouds. Below, I present to you the TOP TEN THINGS MY KID SAYS TO ME TO KEEP ME GROUNDED:

#10 "Percy Jackson already did mythology, and he's a BOY."

#9 "Please don't show your cover to my friends. It's embarrassing."

#8 Me: "I'm going to be in Wal-Mart!" Kid C (shrugging): "I'm in Wal-Mart at least once a week."

#7 "Mom, do you know any REAL authors? Because my teacher needs one to talk to her class."

#6 "Why did you have to write a book about... LOVE?" (Followed by melodramatic gagging sounds)

#5 "Wouldn't it be cool if Nikki ate Jack's BRAINS?! (Yes, he's into Zombies)

#4 (Looking at my cover): "That's a weird looking dude." me: "Um, that's a girl." Him (turning cover upside down): "Oh. I get it." me: "???"

#3 When a friend asked him what my book was about: "Um... Monsters. And dragons. And people who eat BRAINS!" There are none of these things.

#2 (looking at finished copy) "What, they only made it out of paper?" Tosses it onto floor. me: "Yes, they cancelled the gold leaf printing."

And the number one thing my kid says to keep me grounded: "WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE LIKE R.L. STINE?"

If you're a writer, what do your kids say to you?

If you're not a writer... whatcha up to this weekend?

I'm trying to get to my To-Do list, but where am I supposed to find the sand for the Sandcastles?

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 16:11:00 +0000

Hey y'all. There is so much to talk about today!

First off, I was interviewed by Captain Jack Sparrow over on C.J. Redwine's blog. She is truly hilarious, and you can check it out here.

Next up, the Pitch Dark Facebook Page has the first 72 pages of EVERNEATH up. So if you can't wait until January 24th to start the book, head on over!

So, I don't know if you noticed, but EVERNEATH comes out in 19 days. 19 DAYS!!

The other day, I came home to find this on my doorstep:

My niece, M+M, made me a paper chain countdown for the launch date. Isn't that so great? Especially for me, because I have a very hard time counting backward from such large numbers like 19.

Each chain has a quote on it from the book:

So I thought it would be fun to share these quotes as I rip off the chains each day. If you want to follow along, look for me on Facebook or Twitter.

And finally, if you have an interview/swag/giveaway request in to me on my emails, I'm trying to get to them all. Really trying. But yesterday I did four interviews, and then I got eight more requests, so I'm convinced that completing interviews only leads to more, exponentially, and it's very hard. Please be patient, and if I haven't answered you and I was supposed to answer you, send me a reminder.

Because look at my to-do list:

I'm not sure why I have to do these things, but they are on a list, and that means I'm going to do them! Excuse me while I step outside momentarily to Trust the Universe.

You may also do this to-do list, if you're bored. I'm particularly eager to FIND OUT HOW THINGS WORK.

With that in mind, I'm off to dismantle my computer. Wish me luck!

Why I'm Hugging my Mail Today... Because it took Years to get Here

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 17:51:00 +0000

Guess what I got in the mail today?

This little beauty:

An actual hardcover from the first printing of EVERNEATH.

And just like any newborn, it has a spine.

I actually got two copies. Sam said we should keep one of them exactly like it is, and not besmirch it with my signature. Thanks, Sam. I would hate to ruin it by writing my name in it.

Here's the truth:

When I opened the package from HarperCollins, I just sat there in my study for about half an hour, staring at the book. I thought about the journey to get to this point, the culmination of factors both in and out of my control, the multitude of people who contributed to this little clump of bound pages.

There's not enough room on the spine to list them all, but there should be! And those names deserve to be there, mostly because I just spelled "should" as "shood" and my book would've been full of "shood"s without a giant team backing me up.

I tried to get all eloquent about the monumental effort that this book symbolizes, but then I realized the book is the perfect size and shape to make it very huggable, and so I shall forget the big words and sentiments, and I'll just hug it for a little while.

While I'm at it, let me just say a big thank you to all y'all who have been reading this blog, and taking this journey with me. I love everybody today.

World-Building: When You're Missing the Essential World-Building Bone in your Body

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 18:04:00 +0000

So, I'm under deadline. I know it seems like I was just under deadline, and that's because I was.

For those of you who don't know, I'm revising EVERNEATH 2: It's Everneath-ier. This time around, we are focusing on world-building.

And let me tell you something right now: I was born without the world-building bone in my elbow. Doctors were amazed; they would take my x-rays around and show other doctors, and remark, "This little baby is going to have a helluva time trying to build a world that's not exactly like the one we live on."

Most of my world-building looks like this:

Okay, so lets take a planet:

Now we have to ask ourselves, where will the people live?

Let's add some land:

Good. Now, how will life grow? What will the people drink?

Let's add some water.

And... oh crap. I've made Earth. AGAIN!

Then I crumble up the paper and throw it away and start over.

I was supposed to world-build in the last round of edits, but instead I threw in some razzle-dazzle. I gave my editor the old flim-flam-flummox, then I dazed and dizzied her, because how could she see that I couldn't world build when she had sequins in her eyes?

As a final number, I threw in a tap dance.

But the thing is, I can't tap dance, and my editor could see just fine with the sequins in her eyes, and she still said, "Hey, how about we world-build a little?"

Then I tried to explain to her about my unique anatomy:

But she was not impressed. Apparently, she thinks I can do this.

So, yon bloggerville, I think I can do this too.

But just in case, does anyone know what the Underworld looks like? Anyone at all? Geography and demography would be great. And for heaven's sake, do not let it resemble Earth!

My Adventure in Houston, and Bringing my Dad Home for Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 19:52:00 +0000

Hi Everyone!

I hope y'all are enjoying the holidays. It's been a while for me on the blog, I know, but the holidays and my dad's health have definitely had me hopping.

And by hopping, I mean stressing. And by stressing, I mean tearing my hair out, strand by strand, follicle by follicle, until I accumulated enough to knit myself a pair of matching throw pillows for my couch.

Here's a recap:

A couple weeks ago, we landed in Houston because my dad had landed in the ICU there at MD Anderson.

We found him like this:

That picture is deceiving. He's not really giving the "Thumbs up" sign, nor is he saying, "Turn up the gas!" He's actually saying, "Get this contraption off of me, or I will take these thumbs and use them to gouge your eyes out."

He is a very stubborn man. But we needed to get him out of the ICU, in order for him to continue getting his radiation treatment, and get him home for Christmas.

So my mom and my sister and I made a bunch of goals, and stuck them to the television.

If you blow up the picture, you can see that yes, Diet Coke is considered a solid food, and by exercising, we mean cage fighting. We wanted to make the goals as realistic as possible.

The following day, we got to rip off the goal of "Clear chest x-ray," because take a look at that beautiful x-ray on the left.

The one on the right was the day before, and you can tell it is cloudy with fluid. But the one on the left... brilliantly black.

The smiling nurse is Justin. He was very happy to pose for our multitude of pictures, but he drew the line at climbing in the cage with my dad for a fight to the death. He's getting married in a few months, so I understand his hesitation.

A couple days later, we were able to ditch the flattering yellow garb and take my dad for a walk on the observation deck of the hospital, and we got to rip down the goal of "Overcome Vertigo."

Once he was out of the ICU, we made great strides. He even got to wear actual clothes again.

Last week, against all the odds, he was able to continue with his radiation treatments, complete the round, and return home to us just in time for Christmas.

I'd like to take full credit for his recovery, but the honest truth is it was all him. I couldn't have asked for a better present.

May your own holidays be excellent, and your chest x-rays clear!

Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year!

Houston, we had a problem...but things are looking better

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 19:03:00 +0000

This is Sam, Brodi's lovely husband. Brodi is down in Houston, Texas (can I get a Yeehaw? or a y'all?) with her sister and her mom. Her dad is at MD Anderson Cancer Center. He has been there for the past week or two getting some awesome radiation treatment. But, he had a bad spell and some bad luck and has been in the ICU for the past week.

The good news is that he is doing much better now than he was doing earlier this week. We are keeping prayers, fingers crossed, etc. as he enters this weekend. The pic above are DEMANDS by Brodi, her sister and her mom for her dad. They will accept nothing less. And so far, he is listening to their demands - you don't mess with 3 'blonde' women who have their minds made up. The plan now is that her dad will continue to feel better this weekend and and then get some treatment that was in the middle of before his setback, and come home next week. It would be a very nice Christmas gift to everyone if that were to happen.

First off - there is no reason for the pic above except I put it there because it is awesome. With Brodi gone, I am trying to make sure that I don't go insane. For all of you single parents out there...my San Francisco baseball hat is tipped to you. This week has been work, running kids to school, soccer practices, scouts, haircuts, birthday parties, skiing, work, trying to clean the house, homework and regular work once again. I think I have lost my wallet or phone 19 times in the past 3 days. Somehow I am able to find them every single time. But I have probably wasted 7 hours looking for those stupid little things. I have also been able to witness some great conversations between our boys, such as "Do you know that 95% of kids do not get enough whole grain?' Kid C told this to Kid B. Kid B gave him a look that said, 'Seriously, you think I care about that. Seriously?'

Today is also Kid C's birthday, so we had an early breakfast at McDonalds (breakfast of champions, pic on the right...if you look hard enough, you will see a load of fruits and vegetables - I think they are right under the sausage egg mcmuffin wrapper) and then a birthday party at his school. After school, he is headed up to go skiing. After skiing, we are going out to eat at Chuck-a-rama (his choice) or get Hot wings (my choice) and then a Utah Utes basketball game. So, yes, we will be busy. My birthday gift to Kid C is to teach him how to smile like a regular kid. Hope you all have big plans for the weekend. Brodi should be back in the blogging saddle on Monday.

A Very Yoshi Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 17:10:00 +0000

So, Kid B was in charge of decorating the Christmas tree this year. When he was finished, I walked into the living room to see this:

Yep, that there is Giant Green Yoshi, with Small Red Yoshi. And apparently, they've been catapulted onto the tree, and impaled in its branches.

Doesn't he look so comfortable?

Kid B is available as a Decorator-for-Hire. He can Yosherize any tree. Anywhere. Anytime.

And the ornament isn't without its symbolic meaning. Don't you remember when the sheep, and the oxen, and the winged baby dragons bowed their head before the manger? If not, that makes me wonder which version of the bible you are reading.

We, of course, read King Koopa's Bible. I don't want to give any spoilers for those of you who haven't read it.

But the butler did it.

How are your holidays coming along? We are steamrolling ahead toward Christmas, flattening any and all elves who get in our way.

I Found a Treasure I'd Been Searching for for SIX YEARS.

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 19:04:00 +0000

Six years ago, while we were preparing to leave on a trip, my hubs hid the jewelry box containing my wedding ring.

He was concerned that if someone broke into our house, my ring would be the first thing to go.

Why wasn't I wearing it, you ask? That is a discussion for another time. But basically, it boils down to this: I never wear it, because I have a habit of taking it off and leaving it places like bathroom sinks and restaurants and bowling alleys.

You see, I would hate to lose it.

Anywho, we got back from our trip, and since I never wore my ring, there was no reason to get it out of its hiding place.

Fast forward six years. We have since remodeled the kitchen, and a good portion of our house. We have since had another kid. And Sam totally forgot where he hid the ring. You'd think that at some point, during a spring cleaning session, or one of our kajillion garage sails, we would've come across the jewelry box.

But it didn't happen.

Finally, two days ago, Sam was rummaging through some sort of closet and found the jewelry box. Yay!

I'm not sure what this says about us, on several levels.

1. How much do my housecleaning skills suck if we never ran across it for six years?

2. There is a cheerio in the corner of my kitchen floor that I've been able to keep track of for three years. Why couldn't I keep track of my wedding ring?

3. If someone did break into our house, I don't think his first thought would be, "I wonder where the wife keeps her wedding ring." It would more likely be, "Why does this family keep their flat screen under this big pile of Cap'n Crunch?" or "I'd steal the laptop, but my path is blocked by this pile of laundry... and wait... why have half of the keys on the keyboard been replaced with various incarnations of Spongebob Macaroni and Cheese noodles?"

4. Then we'd be featured on that new reality show "When Burglars Stage a Hoarders Intervention instead of actually Burgling the House."

5. I don't know why I'm suddenly numbering everything on this blog post.

6. But Six seems like a good round number to end on.

So... what's everyone up to this weekend? Sam and Kid C are taking ski lessons. Boy would I love to be a fly on that mountain.

Why I wanted to punch my Hubs... No Seriously.

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 23:06:00 +0000

Sorry so late with the blog. I spent the first half of the day with no internet. Now I completely know how the pioneers felt.

Kidding.

Anywho, my brain no longer works right, so Sam has to remind me about things like appointments and parties and stuff. Last Friday, Sam's all, "Kid C's first school ski day is today!"

And I'm all, "What?!"

Sam: "Yeah, he needs gear. GEAR! Lots of gear that starts with the letter 'G' like Goggles and Gloves, and a Gator! And he has to be to this other school parking lot [not our own school, but another school] because if he's not there on time the bus will leave without him!"

So I ran around to a bunch of different places and bought the first goggles they showed me because I didn't have time to price-shop.

I picked Kid C up from school, ran home and changed him. It was like a fire drill at the local station. I'm all, "Strip! STRIP!! Now put these on. No! On your head! Does it look like Goggles go on your feet?!"

Sweats, check.

Pants check.

two long sleeve t-shirts, check.

Ski Jacket, check. Gloves, check. Gator, check. Goggles, check. Hat, check.

Kid C was very nervous. He asked if there would be bullies on the bus. He insisted on wearing every article of ski gear, even though he still had a long bus ride, and even though it was like 65 degrees outside.

65 degrees.

But he didn't want to stand out because he wasn't sure how to put his gloves and goggles and stuff on.

So, I race him to the other school, and we wait.

That was how he looked as the final bell rang, and the entire school came out, filing past him and giving him strange looks. You can see the boy behind him is in simply a t-shirt and jeans, and here's kid C wearing every article of ski gear possible.

And we wait.

And wait.

I call Sam. "Are you sure we're at the right school?"

"Yes, I'm sure! I've never been surer about anything in my life!"

me: "Are you sure it's today?"

Sam: "Yes! I'm even more sure that it's today than I am that you're at the right school!"

We wait.

And wait.

No other skiers show up. But plenty of carpool moms drove by the poor snow boy, looking at me like I'm crazy because it's sunny and warm.

Then my phone rings. It's Sam. "Um... looking at the fine print here... and it seems... the ski program starts next week.

Who wants to break the news to Shaun White here?

So I'm all, "Hey Kid C. Congratulations! You passed the test. I just wanted to make sure it was possible to make it here on time, with you in your complete ski gear. And look! You did it!"

He gave me a look. (I could only see so much of it through his goggles). Then he turned around, slumped his shoulders and clomped his way back to the car.

This is my life lately. What about you?

Three Books I am Excited for... and EVERNEATH gets a Starred Review

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 20:31:00 +0000

First off, the winner of the EVERNEATH mini-giveaway from the YA Scavenger Hunt is...

Tayte Hunter

Please email me your mailing address (brodiashton at gmail dot com) and I'll get that ARC in the mail.

Next...

Now that I've had a chance to breathe, I wanted to talk about some books I've read lately. Unfortunately, they haven't been released, but consider this your official "heads up" to keep an eye out for them!

INCARNATE

INCARNATE is so different than most of the stuff out there! It's sort of Dystopian, sort of Fantasy, definitely romantic, and full of adventure. I thought it was a fabulous debut, and I can't wait to read the next one.

It comes out January 31st, and Jodi is touring with me, so that makes it doubly exciting!

Next up was UNDER THE NEVER SKY

Not only is Veronica Rossi a great person and a great friend, she is also an incredible storyteller. Under the Never Sky is a dystopian, where the worlds of the sheltered "pod-dwellers" and the "savage" outsiders collide, under threats from the ground and the sky. It's pretty incredible.

And finally, I'm in the middle of reading THE SAVAGE GRACE, the final installment in Bree Despain's THE DARK DIVINE trilogy.

So far, there has been an explosion, an ambush at demon rave, and lots of smoochies. Three things that will get me to read any book. :) I can't wait to get back to reading it! It comes out in March.

So, what have y'all been reading? What book have you fallen in love with? Which books are you most excited for?

And, in "EXCITING NEWS I'D LIKE TO SHARE" news:

EVERNEATH received a starred review from VOYA (Voice of Youth Advocates)

“The author brings a fresh, innovative concept to young adult fiction with well-developed characters and a fantastic plot line .... Libraries are advised to buy multiple copies-this one will fly off the shelves.”

— Voice of Youth Advocates (VOYA) (Starred Review)

Publishers Weekly had this to say:

“Ashton’s debut, is complex and intriguing. Drawing inspiration from such myths as Osiris, Orpheus, and Persephone, it explores the nature of loss and longing and what it means to be alive.”

— Publishers Weekly

Thanks for sharing in the excitement with me! And don't forget to tell me about what you've been reading.

Look out Texas! EVERNEATH Tour Stops, and... STUFF

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 17:06:00 +0000

Hey y'all!

If you are looking for the YA Scavenger Hunt post, click here. If you aren't, why aren't you? Simply start at my blog, and make the rounds, and you would be signed up for like 37 separate contests plus the grand prize which is being contributed by 37 different Young Adult Authors! Plus, you get to read all the super-secret bonus content, including a lost scene between Nikki and Jack that some readers have deemed "steamy".

Hint: that scene is on bestselling author Colleen Houck's website.

Okay, that is my plug for the scavenger hunt.

On to exciting TOUR STOP ANNOUNCEMENT!

I will be headed to the Lone Star state (Texas) which is good because I've been in a Lone Star state of mind, ever since my only other star burned out with the last revision.

On a side note, I am also in a Lone Brain Cell state of mind, but that state is more a permanent one.

Side note to the side note: I had to spell "permanent" ten different times before I got it right. And that squishy sound you hear is my final brain cell deflating.

Um... where were we?

Oh yeah. TOUR STOP ANNOUNCEMENT!

Look out Dallas, Austin and Houston, because I'm comin' to getcha! (Okay, why does even the mention of a Texas book tour makes me talk with a really bad cowboy accent? It's like a steamin' pile of cow-pah dung on the fritters of the taters. Makes me wanna slap a skeeter. Niner.) (Somebody help me)

So if you live in one of these fine cities, or any part of Texas, or the U.S., or the world, come and see me!

DARK DAYS OF SUPERNATURAL TOUR STOPS FOR EVERNEATH:

February 16^th @ 5pm Barnes & Noble Southlake, TX

February 17^th @ 7pm Barnes & Noble Austin, TX

February 18^th @ 4pm Blue Willow Bookshop Houston, TX

And it's not just me! I will be with these fine ladies:

Cynthia Hand (HALLOWED), Jodi Meadows (INCARNATE) and Courtney Allison Moulton (WINGS OF THE WICKED)

So, can I get a yee-haw from y'all? Who's with me?

Winter YA Scavenger Hunt, and Enter to Win EVERNEATH

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 18:17:00 +0000

I'm so excited to be a part of today's YA Scavenger Hunt!

As part of the hunt, I get to host the amazing Jocelyn Davies. Also, I have some secret content floating around out there that you'll get to find as well. This secret content is only available to Scavenger Hunt participants, and it involves a first kiss. And Nikki. And Jack. And their first kiss. And, if you read to the bottom, you'll see I'm giving away an ARC of EVERNEATH!

Each author on the hunt is hosting another author’s bonus material AND a link to the next step of the hunt. Take a couple of hours and work your way through the entire circuit collecting the words in red and entering all of the different contests you find along the way.

In one day, you could be entered in like 30 different contests! But only if you complete the circuit. And no matter where you start, you can do the full circle.

Today, I'm featuring Jocelyn Davies, whose book A BEAUTIFUL DARK looks just awesome.

About Jocelyn:

Jocelyn Davies edits young adult fiction at a publishing house in New York, a job that has allowed her to cultivate a keen interest in all things angsty, hilarious, and/or unrequited. She is a graduate of Bates College, and lives in an apartment overflowing with books. A BEAUTIFUL DARK is her first novel.

And now about A BEAUTIFUL DARK, which came out in September from HarperTeen:

On the night of Skye's seventeenth birthday, she meets two enigmatic strangers. Complete opposites;like fire and ice;Asher is dark and wild, while Devin is fair and aloof. Their sudden appearance sends Skye's life into a tailspin. She has no idea what they want, or why they seem to follow her every move only that their presence coincides with a flurry of strange events. Soon she begins to doubt not just the identity of the two boys, but also the truth about her own past.

In the dead of a bitingly cold Colorado winter, Skye finds herself coming to terms with the impossible secret that threatens to shatter her world. Torn between Asher, who she can't help falling for, and Devin, who she can't stay away from, the consequences of Skye's choice will reach further than the three of them could ever imagine.

Doesn't her book sound amazing? You can order it here:

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

Indiebound

Jocelyn explains her BONUS MATERIAL:

The scene on page 341, between Skye and Asher in the adirondak chair on the deck, originally took place in Skye’s bedroom, at night. I love the final scene so much, and it turned out to be one of my very favorites in A Beautiful Dark. But there was something about the intimacy of Skye touching Asher’s wings here—wondering if, or when, she might get her own—that I found really hard to let go of. What do you think?

--Jocelyn

BONUS SCENE:

Stepping out of the shower, I wrapped a plush towel around me, and wiped my hand across the mirror above the sink. This girl stared back at me. She had wet black hair, a pink mouth twisted in confusion, and silver eyes. Not grey. Silver.

When I emerged from the bathroom in my tank top and pajama pants, wet hair pulled back from my face in a clip, Asher was still waiting for me on the bed.

“So, I was thinking,” he said as he flipped through an issue of Teen Vogue that had been lying on my nightstand.

“Again?” I asked.

“Do you want to hear it or not?” He put down the magazine and looked me straight in the eye.

“Amaze me,” I said.

I could tell he was trying not to grin.

“The whole point of the Rebellion is so that we can live by our own rules. That’s the entire reason we jumped.”

“If my history lessons have served me correctly,” I said, my heart speeding up, “then yes. I do believe you’re right.”

“And I know that Devin doesn’t have any choice, and I see how much that hurts him. And I know you’re stuck between two choices, and you don’t exactly have a conscious say in the matter. Your powers will take over when it really matters. They’ll lean towards whichever side your unconscious is leaning, or so we’re led to believe.” Would they really? I wondered. Which side is that?

“But I have a choice, Skye. I have the power to choose whatever I want. And I’ve never known what I’ve wanted, more. I choose you. And the rest, we’ll figure out.” He gulped. “I know you walked away last time, so all I’m asking you to do is just think about it.”

I looked at him, the way his mouth turned up at the corners, even though his eyes stayed so serious. He had a little dimple near the left side of his chin. I had the strangest urge to touch it.

Would I get hurt again? Almost certainly. But was it worth it?

A hundred, thousand times yes.

“No thanks,” I said. “Pick again.”

He smiled.

“Come here,” he said.

I ran over to the bed and jumped on him. He grabbed my arms and pinned them above his head, so that, for a second, it felt like I was flying. Flash, my father lying on his back, holding me up on his knees when I was a little kid. Flash, arms outstretched, pretending I was soaring through the air. Faster than a speeding bullet, he’d say.

Asher smiled. “What are you thinking?” I fell off of his knees onto my side, and pulled him on top of me. His immense weight pressed into me, and it was hard to breathe for so many reasons.

“I want to see something,” I said. “Will you show me?”

“What exactly are we talking about here?”

I took a deep breath.

“Unfold your wings,” I said.

He looked at me funny. Slowly, he let his wings uncurl from his back, covering us in a canopy as I lay beneath him. The black feathers glistened and shimmered in the low light. Carefully, I reached out my hand, and brushed the tips of my fingers along the underside of one wing. Asher shivered.

“What are you doing,” he whispered.

“I would be okay with a pair of these,” I said softly.

The light in Asher’s eyes changed. He drew his wings in and rolled off of me, pulling me to him. He wrapped his arms around me so that there was no space between my body and his, and squeezed me close. I felt the heat of his chest against my back. His breath rose and fell. I couldn’t see him, but I knew he was doing his, trying-not-to-smile, doing-a-bad-job-of-hiding-it thing. Or maybe he was smiling for real.

YA SCAVENGER HUNT CONTEST

As an extra bonus we’ve put together a puzzle with one keyword found on each website. Complete it and you will be eligible for a fantastic GRAND PRIZE which will include signed editions of books, signed bookmarks, jewelry, and many more exclusive gifts with at least one gift from EVERY AUTHOR!

Directions: Search for the 37 keywords—one on each Scavenger Hunt website—that are highlighted in RED. When you are finished, go here to the puzzle form, where you will find a list of scrambled keywords. List your keywords in the same order as the scrambled ones—from #1 - #37—and paste that list into the entry form.

Rules: To be eligible for the grand prize, you must submit the completed puzzle form before noon on Dec 4th Pacific Time. All the keywords must be included and you must include your full name and address. Entries sent in without name and address will not be considered! The contest is international.

And my own mini contest (U.S. Only):

Enter to win an ARC of EVERNEATH!

To enter:

1. Find my bonus material floating around out there in the Scavenger Hunt.

2. Figure out the answer to the following question:

Which class is Nikki (Becks) (the narrator) late for?

3. Email me the answer: brodiashton (at) gmail (dot) com. Put "YA Scavenger Hunt" in the subject.

4. Leave a comment and tell me you emailed me (but don't give away the answer!). Otherwise, your email might get caught in spam, and I won't know to look for it.

So really it involves finding my bonus material and sending me an email.

Phew. That was quite the experience.

Are you ready to go to the next website on the Scavenger Hunt? Click Here.

The EVERNEATH Good Guy and Bad Boy Quiz... and What Kid B did with my Sequel

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 17:02:00 +0000

Status: Watching "Through the Wormhole" with Morgan Freeman. My mind is blown. But I have to watch it because I believe the EVERNEATH is accessible through a wormhole. It's research.

Hey y'all. Sorry for the blog silence on Monday, but every time I tried to blog I came across this:

Yep. That there is a looming deadline, and on Monday it was looming large. My first revision on the EVERNEATH sequel was due Monday.

I celebrated turning in my revision by sleeping all day yesterday. And having a cold. Partay! I am upright today, though, so here I am. On the blog.

A couple of things to share with you:

Thing #1: Have you ever wondered if you go for the Good Guy or the Bad Boy? Well, I have the solution for you. Take the EVERNEATH Good Guy or Bad Boy Quiz and your question will be answered.

For your information, I got the "Good Guy".

Sam got the "Bad Boy".

I don't know what this means. But take the quiz, and then come on back here and tell me what you got. And for those of you who have read the book already, you may recognize some of the choices. But you can still make up your mind which thing you'd rather do. And as we all know, The EVERNEATH is all about choices... dun Dun DUN!

Thing #2: Like any other parent, I've been hanging Kid B's artwork up on the fridge:

Well, the other day I printed out a hard copy of EVERNEATH the sequel, and left it in my kitchen. When I came back, I found various pages hanging up all around the kitchen, like this one on the fridge:

*I had to remove this first picture. Apparently hubby says you can read it, and it contains spoilers. Sorry!*

and these two on the cupboards:

Apparently Kid B is just as proud of my artwork as I am of his.

So, how was everyone's Thanksgiving? I went to my family's ranch. I'll share pictures next blog.

EVERNEATH Thanksgiving Teaser Game, as Played by the Pilgrims of Yore

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:36:00 +0000

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I thought it would be fun to play a traditional game. I have it on good authority* that this game was played at the very first Thanksgiving, as a way to break the ice between the Pilgrims and Native Americans.

It goes like this:

You (blog reader) pick a number between 1 and 374. You (yes, you) leave it in the comments of this blog post.

I will turn to the corresponding page in EVERNEATH and choose my favorite quote from that page, and add that quote to this post. Making this post a giant post of EVERNEATH TEASERS.

Some caveats (which are like cravats, but tied differently):

1. I will do as many as I can. But it is the day before Thanksgiving, so I might not get to them all. Or any.

2. If I do your number, you have to leave a comment and tell me what you think of the quote. :)

I also know that since it's the day before Thanksgiving, there's a good chance no one will actually read this post, and hence no one will pick a number. If that is the case, I am talking to myself right now.

Hey, Bro. What's up?

Nothing, Imagination. What's up with you?

Okay, ready to play? On your mark... get set... GO!!!!!!

*The good authority was my revisionist history professor

TEASERS

pg. 281 (a particularly hot page. Random? I think not):

Cole: "We shared a heart, Nik." He touched his finger to my heart. "Your heart is in me now."

pg. 99 (there was also a great one about a heart, but since we touched on that for the first one...):

Cole: "I had to see what the big deal was. You Returned for this guy, but I have to admit, watching the two of you together... I'm just not seeing it."

pg. 127:

"What is this?" Jack asked, his lip twitching.
"A tea cozy."
"Of course.

pg. 374 (no spoilers!):

Oops. There is nothing on 374. The book ends on pg. 370. Hee hee. Pick again!

pg: 198

I took a deep breath. "That kiss felt different?"
"Yeah," he said.
"Good different?"
He paused. "Yeah."

pg. 1 (opening line)

I was picturing his face - a boy with floppy brown hair and brown eyes - when the Feed ended.

pg. 18:

Even in this room, electric morsels of energy reached me, triggering my hunger, reminding me of where I'd been and how much of my own energy had been stolen.

pg. 268:

"She never had a chance to tell anyone." Mrs. Jenkins gestured to the jar on the mantelpiece. "The current queen found her. Those are her ashes."

I could feel the blood drain from my face. "The queen burned her?"

pg: 169:

Will swung his head around to face me. "They expected me to wear pants!" He sprayed the last word across my face, and I gagged at his foul breath. "Like, all the time... It was so hot."

pg: 19
Now I knew what really happened when emotions were gone Cole bought himself another hundred years of life by draining me, and in the abyss left over there was no peace.

Robin's request for TIEFU:

He leaned forward and said, "Tell me, friend. Is there more for us?"

I looked down at my feet. "There's everything for us."

pg. 117:

"Cheer up, Nik. You can help me splash some shirts." Cole released a breath of air on my face, and suddenly I was overwhelmed with a strange feeling of loss.

pg: 353

Cole:
"I hope you didn't come here to ask for my help. You know I have no power over the balance of the Everneath." Cole glanced at Jack. "Sorry, bro. Even with your biceps, we can't fight the force of nature."

Pg. 222:

Jack:
"Enough, Becks. This is what friends do. Before we got together, we were friends, remember? The friendship is still there, isn't it?"
I didn't say anything for a moment. It was so much more than friendship on my side.

Pg. 7:
I landed with a thwump on a surface that was cold and hard, the side of my face smashed against what looked like industrial tile floor. I could smell ammonia, and it was so strong it made my eyes water.
Where am I?

Pg. 55:

I realized I was leaning against the stall door, my hand over my heart as if I could hold it in. Even if he did tell her he loved her, he was here with me. That meant everything, right?

pg. 96:
The following day, Jack and I were sitting alone in Mrs. Stone's classroom, working, when Cole made good on his promise. A boy, maybe a year older than me, showed up in the doorway.

pg. 123:

Jack didn't come to Mrs. Stone's room for an entire week. He didn't try to speak to me during class. By lunchtime on the fourth day, I found myself going a little crazy.

pg. 311:

What if the Tunnels were coming for me no matter what?
Jack looked like he was about to ask me what was wrong, so I brought his face to mine again.

EVERNEATH Covers from Around the World

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 17:20:00 +0000

I thought it would be fun today to show a couple of the other covers of EVERNEATH from around the world.

First up, we have the U.K. version. Close to the U.S. version, but different fonts and stuff. You can compare it with the U.S version on the sidebar.

Then we have the German cover. Definitely staying true to the Persephone myth, with the pomegranate in view. Every time I see this one, I literally have a craving for pomegranates. Someone once mentioned that there's a device you can use to easily get the seeds out. Does anyone know what that device is?

Germany also did this thing where they sent out the book to bloggers with a dust jacket that had previous blogger comments on it:

I borrowed the images from german blogger Bella's Wonderworld.

I love that idea! I wish every book I ever wrote would be wrapped inside the good things people have to say about it. I'd love to be able to read the comments. Does anyone know a little German?

No, not that kind. The other kind.

Speaking of, if you read and liked EVERNEATH, feel free to tweet me or email me! I love hearing from readers.

If you didn't like it, send an email to J.Sandusky@PennState.edu.*

So, what do you think of these covers and stuff? Please only nice things, because my U.K. and German publishers read my blog too.

And if you have nothing to say on the covers... what are you doing for Thanksgiving? I am having one dinner on Wednesday night, and another dinner on Friday. I'm free on Thanksgiving. Not that you have to invite me to whatever you're doing.

*Just kidding. I totally made up that email, so please don't send any emails for reals.

Confessions about EVERNEATH

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 18:04:00 +0000

Hello yon Bloggerville.

I have a confession.

I have heard it said that my blog can be "funny". I would never presume to say this. But my friends say it all the time. They also say I'm an excellent cook. My friends can be stupid.

But here's a confession. My book, EVERNEATH?: not funny. Not hardy har har funny. Sometimes it can be funny in a "Can you believe there's So. Much. Death?" kind of way. Other times it's funny in a "OMG she is so screwed! lol" kind of way.

There's a reason for this. And it's a pretty simple one. The reason is this: Nikki's story isn't funny. It's the one that was speaking to me, but it isn't funny.

There are funny characters. Cole's probably the funniest, in a "I love to inflict P.A.I.N.!" kind of way.

Jack can be funny too, in a "Why does Nikki make my heart bleed?" kind of way.

It would've been so much easier if I could've stepped up to the computer and written a prolonged, book-length blog post. Sometimes I totally dream about doing this. Maybe for the next book after the Everneath trilogy?

It's not a problem for those people who discover the book first, and the blog second.

Maybe this confession is for those of you who haven't read the book. I want to prepare you. Especially to anyone who's ever said, "I can't wait to read Everneath and LMAO!"

So, writers out there, have any of you ever tried to write something that's in a totally opposite voice to your own?

Have you ever had a story call to you that scares you because you don't think you can write it? I say... write it! I did.

So far, it's worked out okay.

Why I Threatened to Make a Necklace out of Human Hands

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 17:26:00 +0000

Hey y'all.

Okay, so there are a few things I want to tell you about.

First up

I am one of the Debutantes in Badass Bookie's 2012 Debutante Event! All you need to know is that there will be tons of giveaways of the biggest titles of 2012, ARCs, swag, and each author chooses a prom dress! You can check out the details here.

And next up... actually that Debutante thing was the only thing. It just felt like a few things. Because lately, everything seems bigger than it actually is. Every task more difficult. Every direction more confusing.

This might be due to the fact that my revision deadline is two weeks away. And then Thanksgiving. And then Christmas. And then Book Launch. Plus Kid B and Kid C's birthdays in the middle of all that.

Sam said to me this morning: "Kid C has to bring a collection to Scouts today. There has to be at least 10 of whatever he's collecting, and it has to be organized somehow."

me (vacant stare): "Um... okay. So?"

Sam: "So... what should he collect?"

me: "Um... bread?"

Sam (long pause): "Lemme explain again. Kid C has to bring a collection to Scouts. Of something he can actually collect. Something that won't, like, mold and stuff. What can we throw together?"

me (looking around kitchen): "Um... light bulbs."

Sam: "No."

me (eying sink): "Water?"

Sam: "Now you're not even trying."

me (staring at cups): "Water spots?"

Sam (waving a hand slowly in front of my face)

me (watching his hand): "Hands! Good idea. He can collect hands. He can string them together and make a necklace."

Sam (backing away slowly): "Um... It's okay. I'll figure it out."

me (calmly): "But you might need help. With the chopping. And you're gonna need my soldering iron to seal the ends of the veins and stuff."

I looked up, but Sam was gone. Truthfully, I have no desire to make a necklace of hands. But at the time it seemed easier to fake crazy than to actually help Kid C with his collection.

Anyone else feeling the stress right now?

My Three Favorite Sentences from the #3ARCs contest! And my scenario for one of them...

noreply@blogger.com (Brodi Ashton) — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 19:11:00 +0000

I had my nieces choose the winners of the #3arcs contest. Since I knew some of the contestants (either personally or through the interwebz), I didn't want my biases to influence any decisions.

Here are their favorite tweets using the words SLIDE, GLIMMER and EVER.

1. from @ashliepants

SLIDE secrets to ears that can't EVER tell, just because the moon GLIMMERS doesn't mean all is well...

2. from @LisaAldin

As I SLIDE my blood-crusted hands from the cuffs, a GLIMMER of light appears under the door, and I wonder if this game will EVER end.

3. from @woven_

As she let the coin SLIDE from her palm into the GLIMMERing fountain, she knew she wanted this with to come true more than EVER.

I think my nieces did a fantastic job picking the winners. You should've seen them last night poring over the entries. They took their task very seriously.

WINNERS: Please email me your mailing addresses! brodiashton at gmail dot com

You will receive a 3-ARC prize pack of SLIDE, GLIMMER and EVERNEATH!

It's hard to imagine a time when anyone would utter those sentences, so I came up with my own scenarios.

For #1:

A man stands by a pond that reflects the moonlight, thinking the toil of his life. Two years ago, a witch cast a spell upon the man, cursing him to speak only in cryptic rhymes.

A beautiful woman approaches. She has been searching for the man her entire life. "Please, tell me what I need to do to break the curse. Please!"

The man replies, "SLIDE secrets to ears that can't EVER tell, just because the moon GLIMMERS doesn't mean all is well..."

The woman grunts in frustration.

I'll let you come up with scenarios for the other two. Please feel free to share!

So... how's everyone doing? I'm armpit deep in revisions, with only my blog readers to tell me whether it's sunny or snowy outside. So tell me.