Bowl of Granola

This blog is, and always has been, entirely for sale

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 19:49:00 +0000

Hello world. And by "world", I mean the one or perhaps two of you who are negligent enough to have left this blog in your RSS feed. Perhaps you've done so out of affection for yours truly; perhaps you have thousands of atrophied blogs in your Google Reader roll that you can't bother to sort; or maybe you're my stalker, and you make a nightly habit of pouring over these old entries in a dimly lit freight container down by the docks, burning eye holes in photos of me with a lit cigarette.

Whatever the reason, I'm disturbed by you. You shouldn't be here. There are more enriching ways to spend your time. Perhaps you're a candidate for tropical fish ownership. It's not much more exciting than checking in on once-a-year-updates on an obscure blog, but at least you'll have something to show girls when you bring them to your room.

See, almost completely worthless.

Since you are here, and apparently have decided to wage on beyond the barrage of verbal assaults I'm both writing and thinking right now, I can only assume you're considering the purchase of BowlofGranola.com. What a shrewd business person you are. What a captain of industry. You, much like a distant past version of myself, have recognized the potential for profit in owning such a URL, and you are to be commended for your acumen.

You should know that when I got in to the blogging game, I did not do so for frivolous reasons. Much like a prospector recognizes the financial potential in the hills of old timey California, I began this endeavor with comical cartoon dollar signs dancing around my head to a cacophony of cash register noises.

Now that I have achieved all of my financial goals and am posting this from my 100-foot yacht with a customized, stem-cell-infused, Rhino ivory hull, I am ready to pass along this incomparable financial boon to you. Think of all you could do with BowlofGranola.com. You could start a nutrition website. You could start a website that sells bowls. The possibilities are literally endless.

If you are a smart, attractive, business-savvy individual with above average prowess in the bedroom, then you're the perfect candidate to own this url. Contact buythisurl@bowlofgranola.com today to start your new life. You won't be sorry you did!*

* BowlofGranola.com is not responsible for the remorse you will ultimately experience from purchase. We are also not responsible for any financial ruin, personal unhappiness, or general life-ruining that results from this sale.

A new direction...

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 19:29:00 +0000

Howdy.

A resounding "howdy" is more than overdue to all you lovely, patient denizens of the web's dark, dank nooks, crannies and corners. Sadly, as I'm sure you've noticed from The Bowl's pitiful posting frequency, it looks like it too has fallen in to said disused nooks, crannies and corners.

But like the phoenix who must rise from the ashes, or the inebriate vagrant who must hit rock bottom before discovering a revolutionary new theory in quantum physics, so too must Bowl of Granola renew and revitalize.

In the furtherance of this objective, I'd like to present three alternative themes for future content on this site. If you do find the time to dust-off your RSS feeds and view this post, feel free to weigh-in on these prospective new directions for The Bowl. If you have your own unique ideas about future content, get the hell out of here and start your own blog. It's not hard. Really. I did it.

1. BoG Celebrity Breakfasts

Nomnomnomnom...

Capitalizing on the intrinsic search engine value of the url www.BowlofGranola.com (one I've spent literally tens of dollars to maintain over the years), BoG Celebrity Breakfasts would scour the web for the very latest articles, tweets and posts on the dietary proclivities of today's brightest stars. If Halle Berry enjoyed a hearty portion of Muesli in West Hollywood last Tuesday, the public deserves to know. If Michael Cain paused on a London street corner to nosh on a Clif bar, The Bowl will post, syndicate, aggregate and repost. The fertile grounds of Hollywood breakfast gossip are ripe for the plow, and Bowl of Granola has the perfect opportunity to get in on the ground level before mainstream sites like the Huffington Post and CNN.com snatch up all the market share.

2. Bowl of Granola's Above Average Pet Adoptions

Not so fast there, buddy.

Let's face it, animal shelters are filled with hundreds, if not thousands of adorably homeless pets. That said, not all of these fuzzy friends are created equal. What originally appeared as a bright and sociable tabby can eventually become nothing but a fluffy burden of only mediocre intelligence. For the discerning adopter, Above Average Pet Adoptions weeds out the chaff. Our series of patent-pending animal IQ and personality tests apply a rigorous set of standards that take all of the annoying guess-work out of adopting a pet. Never again wonder if that adorable beagle could ever really learn to balance a rubber ball on his nose. Above Average Pet Adoptions selects only the very best and brightest forsaken animals to feature for adoption. Above Average Pet Adoptions - The Only "Natural Selection" You'll Ever Have to Make

3. [insert niche porn category site here]

If you tilt your head at just the right angle...

Much like overfilled animal shelters are a harsh, but unavoidable reality of life, so too are the swaths of niche pornography websites available on the internet. This idea is admittedly the most underdeveloped of the three, but it's also worth noting that it has the most potential to provide a return on my to-date investment of both time and approximately $25 in BowlofGranola.com. I'm not sure what sort of niche a pornography site called BowlofGranola.com would fill, but I'd certainly be interested to find out. Maybe it would feature animated gifs of attractive people eating cereal in the nude (note the potential crossover with idea #1). Or it could abandon the url's theme entirely and create a long-overdue home for Crypto-zoological-philiacs (those who fantasize about intercourse with Unicorns, Dragons, etc...). It's too early to say what my porn empire will ultimately look like, but it's not too early to say that it will afford me a gold-plated XBOX.

Because otherwise, what's the point?

Boredom in Perpetuity

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 21:53:00 +0000

So, it being nearly a year since my last post, I thought I'd drop back in and say hello.

I bring you today, a delightful song parody written by yours truly.

This was inspired by a post on a gaming forum I frequent titled "The Day Games Died". It got stuck in my head and resulted in the following:

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How my XBOX used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had my way
I could play most every day.
And, maybe, I’d be happy for a while.

But three red rings, they wrecked my morning,
Crashed my rig and gave no warning.
Those little lights were once green,
Now I'm staring at a blank screen.

Now, I can’t remember if I cried
When Master Chief's death was implied,
But something touched me deep inside
The day my XBOX died.

Oh why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

Did you play Oblivion,
And shoot-off fireballs just for fun,
Or was your character melee?
Or do you excel at C.O.D.,
And let grenades fly far and free,
With enough kills for a thousand UAVs?

Well, I thought that I should try a Wii
or just go get a PS3.
But I just bought a year of Live,
They pressured me to subscribe.

Now I'll spend way more than a buck
To fix this deluge of bad luck.
Damn, the whole world sure did suck,
The day my XBOX died.

I started singin’,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

Now for one month I was on my own
While I just sat there and bitched and moaned,
Cause' that's just how it had to be.
While the techies solder, prod and poke,
Laughing at this cosmic joke.
Cause' my fee, it pays their salary.

Oh and while my three-sixty was down,
I was the saddest kid in town.
I had just bought GTA,
but had no means to play!
And while my friend edits his avatar,
and a "Hero" played his fake guitar,
All I had was NPR,
The day my XBOX died.

We were singing,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

Smackdown, Crackdown I'll just have to back down,
Fallout will wait while I sit with a slacked frown,
Watching my XBOX gather dust.
I'll no longer be Left 4 Dead,
Only slaughter zombies in my head,
While the Gears of War will slowly start to rust.

Now instead of playing Bioshock,
I'm stuck here staring at the clock.
No genes around to splice,
Or junkies to freeze in ice!
So The Big Daddies are forced to yield,
And the doors to Rapture all are sealed.
My low HP just can't be healed,
The day my XBOX died.

We were singing,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

Oh, once we were all in one place,
Connected through cyberspace
Sporting censored gamertags.
So come on: Microsoft please fix it quick!
Don't drag your ass and act like pricks.
Because Sony and Nintendo can contend.

Oh, but hey that looks like UPS!
With a package for my stoop to bless.
Was that just my doorbell?
Oh god, I'm through this hell!
As I swung the door with sheer delight,
I stumbled on a loathsome sight
They didn't have the address right,
The day my XBOX died.

We were singing,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

I tried to play my PS2,
Then sit and watch some Doctor Who,
But it was just not the same.

So I went straight down to my Gamestop,
And brought some games that I could swap
But I left there empty-handed, full of shame.

And back on Live, the PWNers reveled
The children cussed and the noobies leveled,
I could not have spoken,
My XBOX still was broken.
And while the gamers I admire most
Lost connection to their host,
I went to Tweet a nasty post.
The day my XBOX died.

And they were singing,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.
My warrantee expired last July.

They were singing,
Why, why, did my three-sixty fry?
Lost all control of my console,
Now I just want to cry.
And I get no help from their lame tech support guy.
He says my warrantee expired last July.

Royal Gaga

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 15:02:00 +0000

So I know I haven't posted in forever, and I might not post much in the days to come, but this....this requires a post:

No, your eyes aren't playing tricks. That is indeed Lady Gaga curtseying to the Queen of Freeking England. Now I've seen eeeeevvvvrything.

The Hey Jude Flowchart - Charttastic

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 15:41:00 +0000

I think the following speaks for itself.

Via.

Burning City Firescreens - Friday Design Inspiration

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 14:33:00 +0000

Apologies for the light volume of updates this week folks. BoG is a labor of love, and sometimes it falls victim to labors of money, video game experience points and Facebook Scrabble.

That said, here's a little designy goodness to get you through the weekend. These awesomely apocalyptic creations are right at the top of my Christmahaunakwanzica list this year. I'm talking to you, Black Menorah Santa.

Oh, and can you also bring me a working fireplace? Yes, I'm well aware of the irony of asking Santa for a fireplace, but still, I've been moderately good this year and I think I deserve it.

Thanks to the folks at MakeMyMood.com for the tip.

Close Call - The YouTube Vault

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 13:21:00 +0000

Drunk Guy Fail - The YouTube Vault

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 15:55:00 +0000

Link

Book of Odds - Depths of the Net

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:31:00 +0000

For this week's startling Depths of the Net, we bring you the Book of Odds. This handy little site can calculate the odds of almost any random occurance. For example did you know that your chances of....

Visiting the emergency room for a drinking straw-related injury are
1 in 166,600

Drowning at work, regardless of your profession, are
1 in 91.47

Having a clothes dryer in your house are
1 in 1.29

Being injured on a mountain bike, if you're a regular mountain biker are
1 in 837.7

The site is filled with a seemingly endless stream of similar statistics, most of which are garnered from census data and past surveys. Check it out. Not a bad way to burn an hour.

Best. Tattoo. Ever.

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 20:43:00 +0000

There are no words. I wept openly when I saw this tattoo.

Hand Painting - Daily Design Inspiration

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 15:51:00 +0000

These are freeking awesome. You can view the entire gallery over at ThatWasFunny.com

Bullet Impacts - The YouTube Vault

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 18:53:00 +0000

Smart-Ass Test Answers

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 15:37:00 +0000

Thanks to Katie for providing today's two scoops of hilarity. Buy things from her to show your gratitude. Do it.

What is Columbus Day? - Fictitious History Lessons

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 11:58:00 +0000

It is with great excitement and also excitedness that I wish you all a very happy Columbus Day. Now many of you, like myself, haven't the first clue what this holiday celebrates. Well my friends, that's all about to not change!

So sit forward, tense up and get ready to learn things that are totally untrue about most people's 3rd favorite Monday holiday, Columbus Day!

Origin:
It's always good to begin at the beginning and present cited facts about historical records, so I won't. Columbus Day, named after time-machine-enthusiast Timmy Columbus, marks the anniversary of the completion of the Great Pyramid of Giza.

Literally hundreds of years ago, right after Cleopatra contracted the first-recorded case of syphilis from sexy aliens that built the pyramids, Timmy Columbus showed up at Cleopatra's house. While attempting to visit the distant future, he mistakenly set his time machine clock to whatever year she was living in.

His time machine ended up materializing in her bathtub. Thankfully she was out for a walk with King Tut at the time, so no one was injured except for only ten of her bathroom servants who died.

When she returned from her walk, she sent King Tut to the Ancient Egypt Store to buy some beer or something. Upon entering her bathroom, she discovered Timmy Columbus, who had passed out from all the brain-scrambling time travel.

Then she killed him with sex and used his ground-up bones to finish the last block on top of the Pyramid.

Observance:
Many people observe Columbus Day, most of them with their eyes. The blind also celebrate, but they do so privately.

In America, until the late 19th Century it was custom to chase pigeons on Columbus Day. Today, it is considered cruel for adults to chase pigeons, but Americans have been doing so since the late 19th Century, in celebration of Columbus Day.

Food:
Columbus Day revelers never eat on Columbus Day. It is one of the many ways Columbus Day is like lent or some other religious fasting thing.
Clothing:
Clothing is important to wear. If you don't wear clothing, you could be burnt somewhere bad, or end up in jail. And remember, from each dollar you spend on clothing 10 cents is used to starve children. (see above)
Animals:
There's nothing special to mention about animals on Columbus Day.

So there you have it. I bet you never knew you never knew so much about Columbus Day, and guess what? You still don't! Enjoy the day. Drink, don't eat, wear clothes and thank Timmy Columbus, without whom Cleopatra's bathtub might still be around today.

Wicked Stupid Hat of the Day

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 12:46:00 +0000

As the Queen of calculated fashion risks, Madonna generally has her finger on the pulse of today's hip-hoppity, jazzy-fresh, 20-sumpin' style trends. Many items from her iconic wardrobe age like fine wine, complemented by classic style and elegance.

This is not one of those items.

What the hell is on her head? Could it be a teal seabird thrashing for its life in a twisted ocean of golden locks? Perhaps a fashion-forward (and teal, did I mention teal?) symbiotic alien thing, a Venom/Versace hybrid if you will, trying to suck out what little grey matter is left up there?

Seriously Madonna, this hat is wicked stupid.

BRB - Cape Cod Extravaganza

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 10:08:00 +0000

Hello internets! This very special message comes to you from Past Josh. I know what you're thinking, and no, I haven't perfected my homemade time travel device (which reminds me, does anyone know where I can find some weapons-grade plutonium and an old claw foot bathtub?).

No, this very special message comes from Thursday Josh who, in an impressive display of foresight, decided to create and schedule this entry before a much needed long-weekend-long sojourn to Cape Cod, MA.

So, regrettably Bowl of Granola will remain dormant for the next two days (which for me (Past Josh), are Friday and Saturday, but for you will be Sunday and Monday....got it?) while I soak in what little sun is left in a mid-October New England.

Please totally disregard the preceding message if...
- Blogger messes up and posts this before Saturday.
- Nuclear holocaust.
- You can't read.
- Zombie War ensues.
- The cafeteria runs out of mustard.

Update: After finishing this entry, I got bored and wrote one for each day I'll be gone. So yeah...you didn't really need to read any of this. Happy Saturday!

The Genre Fiction Generator - Depths of the Net

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 12:00:00 +0000

Writers Block, your days are numbered, at least while the Genre Fiction Generator is still in glorious existence. This handy chart allows its user to navigate the murky waters of genre fiction, specifically Sci-Fi, with snappy visuals and old-world charm.

Now I don't really expect you to read all those teeny tiny words. The thumbnail is just a taste. Click here to access the fully monty and to check out Wondermark, which is chock full of similarly useful information.

So next time you're stuck for an idea, why not start with...

On a coal-powered one-way spaceflight, a young farm boy with dreams stumbles across a time-traveling soldier which spurs him into conflict with murderous robots with the help of a shape-shifting female assassin and her welding gear, culminating in a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series. The Astromancer. Coming to theaters Summer 2010.

Reasons to Never Go Back in the Water - Oarfish

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 18:22:00 +0000

It's called an Oarfish, and it can grow up to 11 meters in length. It is officially the longest bony fish in the world, according to the Guinnes Book of World Records.

An adult Oarfish has approximately 400 dorsal spines running the length of its back. These spines are used as a means of locomotion, and also to ward off predators (scientists claim that they give off a nasty shock, like an electric eel).

They usually stick to deep waters, but they've been known to ominously rise to the water's surface when sick or dying. It is also speculated that they are one of the origins of the many tall tales about killer sea serpents.

Read more about this horrifying nightmare-fuel beast at Wikipedia.

Facebook Status Generator - Depths of the Net

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 17:39:00 +0000

It's time for another scintillating (spelt correctly on the first try, woohoo!) installment of Depths of the Net!

This week, we bring you the Facebook Status Generator.

This useful little widget generates delightfully surreal Facebook statuses on demand. I've generated about 10 random statuses now, and most of them are way better than any status I've ever created myself. A few highlights:

...has been frenziedly googling for reluctant geriatrics.

...collects photographs of Teflon genitalia.

...smokes noodly bazookas.

This has also introduced me to the word "noodly", for which I will be eternally grateful.

Link

Wednesday Wordplay

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 10:00:00 +0000

1. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.

2. A will is a dead giveaway.

3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

4. A backward poet writes inverse.

5. In a democracy it’s your vote that counts; in feudalism, it’s your Count that votes.

6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

7. If you don’t pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I’ll show you A-flat miner.

10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.

13. You are stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.

14. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

15. He broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.

16. A calendar’s days are numbered.

17. A lot of money is tainted: ‘Taint yours, and ‘taint mine.

18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.

21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.

22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

23. When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.

24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she’d dye.

26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

27. Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses.

28. Acupuncture: a jab well done.

29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.

Via

Just Something to Think About

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 15:56:00 +0000

Via

Sunday School - Bizarre Animal Facts

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 12:00:00 +0000

Happy Sunday folks. Just a few quick facts to keep the brain juices flowing over the weekend. Happy Hangovers!

Butterflies taste with their feet.

An octopus will eat its own arms if it gets hungry enough.

The world smallest mammal is the bumblebee bat of Thailand, weighing less than a penny.

If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.

Honeybees have hairs on their eyes to help them collect pollen.

The left leg of a chicken is more tender than the right one, which it uses most, therefore increasing muscle development.

The sperm of a mouse is longer than the sperm of an elephant.

As carriers of the bubonic plague, fleas were responsible for killing 1/3 of the population of Europe in the 14th century.

The African Lungfish can live out of water for up to 4 years.

An elephant can smell water three miles away.

There are more cows than people in the US.

The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age.

It takes seven years for a lobster to grow 1 pound.

Annie Leibowitz's Disney Dream Portrait Series

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 14:00:00 +0000

These are just gorgeous. Photographer Annie Leibovitz collaborates with Disney and some super-super-stars to breathe new life in to classic Disney fairy tails. Enjoy.

Scarlett Johannson as Cinderella

David Bekham as Prince Phillip

Whoopi Goldberg as The Genie

Gisele Bundchen as Wendy, Tina Fey as Tinkerbell and Mikail Baryshnikov as Peter Pan

Beyonce as Alice, Lyle Lovett as the March Hare and Oliver Platt as the Mad Hatter

Jessica Beil as Pocahontas

Julianne Moore as The Little Mermaid

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony as Jasmine and Alladin

For a few more shots, and much larger versions of these pics, check out AmO Images. All photos are courtesy of and copyright of Disney. Please don't sue us, Disney, we just think these are pretty.

Trick Pitch - YouTube Vault

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 16:47:00 +0000

Video link.

Crimes Against the English Language - Spam Edition

noreply@blogger.com (Josh) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 14:58:00 +0000

So I woke up today to find the following message in my inbox, undisturbed by Gmail's purportedly fool-proof spam filter. Never before have so many run-on sentences gelled to form such an inscrutable run-on email. Enjoy.

----------
Dear Daddy,

Is me your dear obedient son who due to circumstances and war crisis in our country has resulted I and my dear Mother now residing in a refugee campus in Ghana which we find a critical situtation since our health is even at risk for everyday and week other in mates living here die of cholera and here is the home where we seeking political aslyum since over in our country it isn't safe anymore because my father Dr.Slyvester D. Slanger of (DR.SLANGER & CO. MINING) who was the Administrator for Gold Mining Company was shot dead in our own country and so it doesn't make our country of origin safe at all,and i am the elderst child of my father and we are 4 brothers as families 2 died in a car accident in our country and experts say they were hit by gun,Is now left with my only surviouring brother who is also here with i and my Mum and he is my junior brother,he is 15 years old and i am also 22years old.

Daddy as we spoke yesterday on the phone concerning my late fathers consignment of (2500KGS) of Gold Bars worth an amount of $50millionUSD that i told you he deposited it with a Global Security company in thier security safe vault in Ghana and for that matter we will need your urgent assistance to represent as our late fathers foreign beneficiary so we could possibly make claims of my late fathers consignment so that it could be transferred to you at your destination so we could join you to invest from the sales of the gold bars and we hope by so doing you will change our way of living which isn't good at all and as for my junior brother he needs to further his education and i also would want to be an Entrepnuer in future i think you can help us have a better home and also make our dreams come true after we had claim my late father's property from the security company.

I am waiting to have a chance to go out from the refuge campus to go out and scan so that i can send u the ownership documentations and the gate pass will be given in a few hours from now if not possible i will do that tomorrow so you can know how truly and really we will need your assistance to claim our late fathers deposit to make a new life for us and also your effort will be greatly rewarded and so your urgent reply will be needed so after we have heard from you we could contact my late fathers legal attorney for him to begin with the process on:slanger_evans@yahoo.com.

Get back to us soon Daddy. (LTE Dr.Slanger Families).

First Son,

Evans.

----------

All this "Daddy-talk" makes this person sound like a spammy Hillary Banks.

Feel free to shoot First Son Evans an email at any point today. Oh, and tell him "Daddy" says hi.