By now, most of us have already seen the awesome extended version of the Avengers movie Super Bowl XLVI ad. Actually, I just finished watching it for the 17th time and I have a few thoughts (other than HOLY CRAP IT’S ONLY THREE MONTHS AWAY). Three thoughts to be exact:

1. Producer Kevin Feige keeps insisting that the Skrulls are not in the movie while the Internet says he’s a big fat liar. I think they don’t look like Skrulls but only because they’re not green. Can’t really see the details but they kind of look like giant alien barbarians. The Badoon, maybe? Maybe they’re creatures from any of the 9 realms, recruited by Loki or some other big baddie to dick around with Earth. I could care less which alien race this is as long as they look good — and by “good” I mean “nasty”.

“ALIENS ASSEMBLE! If we are indeed aliens.”

2. I just love the fact that Tony Stark is talking about the name of their little superhero club while enjoying a little drink in front of Loki. I think this is right before the God of Mischief chokeslams Tony through the window.

3. THE HULK PUNCHES A JET. YES.

I don’t know about you but at this point, what I feel about this movie is exactly what Kristen Bell feels about sloths. I’d probably shake and cry on my way to the theater.

If you haven’t seen the ad yet, here you go:

This is the stuff that sets forum boards aflame. Who’s going to win in a fight between Iron Man and Magneto? How about Namor and the Thing? Forget the main story. Forget the introspective view of secondary characters as seen in previous event tie-in series. This tie-in series is all about the fights and man, I am pumped! Here are some of the bouts I would love to see aside from the announced Iron Man vs. Magneto and Namor vs. Thing smackdowns:

1. Captain America vs. Cyclops

There’s a good chance that these two opposing generals will come to blows at some point during Avengers vs. X-Men and they’ll probably talk a lot while doing it. But I still want to see an entire half of a comic book dedicated only to these two leaders exchanging punches and hurtful words.

2. Ms. Marvel vs. Emma Frost

I know most people hope and expect a girl fight between Ms. Marvel and Rogue, but we’ve seen that a millions times already. Can’t we have two hot blondes duking it out in skimpy clothing — preferably in the rain — and not worry about how their powers do not go well in a comic book fight for once?

3. Vision vs. Danger

If you haven’t heard, the Vision is back. The real Vision, not that punk in Young Avengers. Who better to welcome the returning synthezoid than the living, walking training room of the X-Men? I would love to see Danger and the Vision compute the hell out of how they can beat each other in a fight. Also, who doesn’t like seeing machines punching each other in the face?

4. Black Widow vs. Hope

I was torn between Hope and X-23 as Black Widow’s opponent but since Laura’s joining the Avengers side of the fence soon, I’m guessing Hope is a safer bet. Trained to be the ultimate survivalist and soldier by Cable IN THE FAR FUTURE, it would be fun to see how Hope would fare against the deadly Widow. Also, red heads! Yay!

5. Avengers Academy vs. Jean Grey School for Higher Learning

An entire school of superheroes-in-training going to war with an entire school of mutants. It would be fun and funny and cute and violent. It would be glorious.

6. Hank Pym vs. Dr. Nemesis

This is a battle to be fought in the arena of SCIENCE! Imagine all the weird gadgets and scientific mumbo jumbo involved in a fight between two of the smartest people on Earth. Personally, I prefer to see them locked in a SCIENCE RAP BATTLE.

Dr. Nemesis never approves of my ideas. :(

7. Red Hulk vs. Colossus

From the first teaser image we saw, we already know that a clash between these two titans is inevitable. It may not be the most compelling story, but it’s going to be the most destructive fight. Violence is the name of the game here so this fight needs to happen.

8. Mockingbird/Valkyrie vs. Dani Moonstar

If Moonstar somehow gains her Valkyrie powers back, I would love to see her take on the “official” Valkyrie of the Marvel Universe (if there is such a thing). That’s going to be some hot Norse chick-on-chick action right there. But I would also settle for a powerless Moonstar going toe-to-toe with Mockingbird. They can even call in help from their respective teams, the New Mutants and the New Avengers, for a bigger clusterfuck of fun. Bottom line is I just want to see Moonstar going Jack Bauer on someone’s ass.

9. Iron Fist vs. Psylocke

KUNG FU NINJA VIOLENCE!

10. Young Avengers vs. Gambit

Man, I really want to see a bunch of kids dressed up as the Avengers beating the gumbo out of Gambit.

Whichever fights are to be included in AVX: Versus, I would gladly pay to see it. This is why I love Marvel. Sometimes, they can be huge dicks. But sometimes, they roll out awesome stuff like an entire series based entirely on superpowered violence.

He will not die because he is DOOM, Destroyer of Worlds. This kind of confidence is what I’m bringing into the new year.

2010 was not really good to me. It was bland at best. But 2011 was an entirely different story altogether. In 2011, I got my groove back. I met a girl and I was lucky enough to win her heart. We’re now in a 9-month relationship and we’re getting better at this whole being a couple thing everyday. I also got a new job that I didn’t know I wanted until I got it. Plus, I have two paid writing gigs on the side to boot.

2011 has been very good to me and I’m hoping 2012 will be better. I’ll be greeting the new year with DOOM-like confidence. In 2012, I shall be invincible. In 2012, gods shall not dare stand against me. I hope all of you will carry this same insolent swagger into 2012. Happy new year, everyone!

10 Things Single People Can Do on the Internet on Valentine’s Day

I’ve spent years without feeling the warm touch of a girlfriend so I consider myself an expert in being single. That’s why I came up with this list that aims to help single people everywhere cope with the bitter cold that is Valentine’s Day.

Superhero Pick-Up Lines

Sleazy pick-up lines and superheroes are kind of my thing, so I guess nobody was surprised when I came up with this list of superhero pick-up lines.

A Guide to the Return of the Living Dead Movies

I actually spent a couple of days just watching the 5 Return of the Living Dead movies. It was such a humbling and mind-numbing experience that I just had to share with the Internet.

I Survived Forever 21

I never knew the experience of shopping could scar one for life, but Forever 21 proved me wrong. Maggie, my lovely girlfriend, brought me there and I feel it is my duty to warn my brothers from other mothers about that place. I’m kidding. I totally had fun.

GetGlue Sticker Rejects

I may not be as crazy about GetGlue stickers as I was a few months ago but I’m still quite proud that people found some of these jokes funny. Or so they say. Those liars.

27 Awkward X-Men the Animated Series Screencaps

Everybody — and I mean everybody — loves the X-Men animated series from the ’90s. Earlier this year, I was working from home and I had the freedom to watch all 5 seasons of this cartoon series. Naturally, I felt the urge to show the rest of the world some of the most awkward screencaps from the series. Just because.

A One Year Experiment in Blogging

This is a series of 4 blog entries. It’s about blogging, SEO and other shit that may actually have some value for some of this blog’s visitors. Shocking!

My Top 10 Comic Book Movies with Ratings by Dr. Doom

DOOM SPITS AT YOUR TASTE IN MOVIES!

5 Ways to Prevent Yourself from Buying an iPad Which Is Actually Just A Piece of Wood

One of my favorite topics in the universe is dumb things happening to dumb people. I wish I could write more of this shit because I love entertaining myself.

3 Reasons Why We Need More Movies Like Zombadings 1: Patayin Sa Shokot Si Remington

I’ve only seen a few Tagalog movies this year but only a couple of them really stood out. One of these movies is Zombadings. I plan to own it on DVD. I don’t have any Tagalog movie DVD in my collection and I will be happy to make Zombadings the first one. That’s how much I love this movie.

10 Great Moments from X-Men: Schism

Wolverine vs. Cyclops! A bunch of kids made a fool out of Namor and Magneto at the same time! Sentinels all over the world! With all the other events in comics this year like DC’s New 52, I only truly enjoyed one. This is a list of my 10 favorite moments from the series.

What Would You Do If You Were Bitten by A Zombie?

Finally, here is proof that this blog is not just about comics and stupid people and lame jokes and dickery. Here is proof that in this blog, I also ask the hard-hitting questions.

Feel free to look at the rest of my 2011 entries and see what other dumb things I have in store for you. I hope you had a great year and I hope you’re ready to have a better one. Happy new year, everyone! BRING IT, 2012!

Whatever god you pray to and no matter how crappy your year has been, just know that it will all be better if you are not alone. Nobody should be alone on Christmas or New Year’s. So go eat a sinful amount of food. Go be with your family, including your annoying relatives. Go dick around with your friends, even those questionable ones from the Internet. It’s time to put the rage away. Let love loose and linger.