The other thought that may go through you mind as it did mine, is you will give more when you receive more. I said this when I was on a low salary. A few years later I had tripled my salary (it was a good few years) yet I was still as broke as before and somehow didn’t have enough to give. This is when I knew I had something wrong.

So when I made the move to my own business I was on a income of less that the low salary I started with all those years ago. But I decide there is enought to go around and I donated 10% of my income to charities of my choice.

Suprisingly there was enough money to go around. I was earning less than ever and giving more than ever. And when I started giving I started receiving more money. There is no direct link of that money coming back to me, some call it karma, others may call it a change of mindset and being open to more money coming into your life.

One important aspect is to make sure you give to people with no expectation of receiving. I was quite happy to know my money went to a good cause without ever seeing anything back again. The biggest gift is you feel great about knowing you helped someone in need and in some cases you are reaching out to people in their darkest hour to offer them a bit of light.

I can not find out who said this or if the quote is exact but it is very appropriate – “You can never give without receiving.”

When I stretched out my hands so that I couldn’t keep them both in my eye sight at the same time I started throwing again. My other hand was ready to respond very quickly to the incoming lemon and kept having to reach to catch it as the other hand threw it.

But then I realized something. Why don’t I put my empty hand in the place I want it to go, then get the other hand to throw it there. And suddendly my empty hand doesn’t move, I take some action with my other hand, and there appears a lemon.

So what did I actually learn from this.

1. Set your goal (putting your hand where you want them lemon to be)
2. Take directed action towards your goal (throwing it)
3. It may not take the path you expect but it does get there
4. As tempting as it is to move your hand, have faith and watch it land where you want it to.

A simplified version on acheiving goals, but it does give you a nice overview. Happy lemon throwing.

But that’s not a business owner speaking, that is my inner employee speaking. When I was working I would go to work and it didn’t matter about the tasks I was doing because I was getting paid at the end of the day regardless. So the manager takes a look at all the things needed to do to achieve a goal then delegates the tasks. The tasks I do contribute towards this goal, but they aren’t making money right now, I might not even be able to see how its contributing effectively. Being a small business owner the number one concern is cash flow. A stupid mistake on my part.

The problem, I have lost my vision. Defining a clear vision of what you want then breaking it down into steps. It’s as simple as that. If the steps you have aren’t fun, then find another way. Sometimes if you just keep thinking of the vision, thoughts will pop into your head on which way to go. It’s amazing that the brain continually ticks over calculating these answers without bothering your conscious mind at all.

Get a clear vision, crystal clear, then the answer on how to do it will appear. Most likely causing you to hit your head thinking how come I never thought of this before.

Well the universe was listening once again and tony robbins created a few videos on why people don’t always follow through, which was extermely enlightening, as is most of what tony says. http://tonyrobbinstraining.com/320/interview-with-frank-kern-and-john-reese/

I will go through those videos in my next post but I also wanted to touch on something that I still think will prevent most people from following through. And that is the ability to admit when their information about a subject is wrong.

For some people it is extermely hard to even get them to listen to such advice as is offered above.  The things that can stop new ideas and teachings from being accepted include

• Pride (normally the biggest, and especially prevalent in an argument)
• They trust their source of information too much that they couldn’t possibly be wrong
• It may mean they have to accept they have done something bad or awful to a loved one or friend

It is OK to be wrong. Admit it and move on or be stuck in your false reality forever more. I have been proven wrong many times and as much as it sometimes pains me to admit it to friends or family I do. I have even admitted I was wrong on an occasion where I had to accept I did the wrong thing by my son. But now I can ensure I don’t do it again in the future to other children I may have and that I will not redo it again to my son.

So my advice, get over any pride issues you may have, be open to EVERY idea no matter how absurd in your mind it sounds and listen carefully to everything that is given to you. And by absurd I even mean if someone says “if you jump off the effiel tower you get transported back in time 30 minutes” even listen to that. Don’t try it out obviously, but think it out and listen to the person saying it. They may be correct. And who knows you may be travelling back in time 30 minutes next week or listening to someone who tells you how to make a million dollars and actually doing it.

So the options you have are this

1. Keep going until you are no longer productive anyway and then take a few weeks off feeling horrible
2. Feel great and relaxed on a vacation for 1 week and come back refreshed and very productive, always working at your best.

So there are 2 options and its clear to see at the end of the day (or month) which one will produce more results and leave you feeling great.

So why would you take option number 1? I have only started taking option number 2 but still not as early as I would have liked. The key is to find out the early warning signs that you need a break and should take one.

• You start feeling a bit anxious and stressed at tasks throughout the day
• You work 12-16 hours in a day (this one is quite obvious)
• You are not as enthusiastic at your tasks as you once were
• You don’t take at least a few hours out of the day/night to sit down and relax
• Your patience starts diminishing
• You are restless in your sleep
• You don’t look forward to tomorrow
• You get sick (obvious one again). You only get sick when you are stressed. Your body is saying slow down.

While there are plenty more its worth to have a read of this list and keep them in the back of your mind so you can notice them when they start to happen. I always find it difficult to notice my own habits, especially when you are deeply involved in work.

Just remember, very productive and 1 week off feeling great, or slow and unproductive and 2 weeks off feeling bad. Its clear which one everyone should take.

There are many things in your life you should be doing. For example exercising several times a week, or not eating fast food. And while many of us take note of these we still continue to do something we know we shouldn’t or should.

I used to drink heaps of soft drink, and heaps of junk food, until suddenly I started feeling the effects. I started getting head spins, unexplained by CAT scans, and shoulder/bone aches after drinking many sugary soft drinks. Even after this I continued for a while until I needed to stop. I am proud to say it has been over 5 years since I have even touched soft drink and feel better for it. Then years later I stopped with the fast food as I was getting very overweight (I actually classified as obsese).

Now I am back down to a healthly weight but back to my point, why did it take me so long to do something. Why must I have waited until I was seeing physical signs that I knew where coming before I acted. Even scarier still, why do some people who see the signs still keep going?

If you were at your death bed and someone said would like an extra few years of life or all those memories of chocolate you ate, what you would say? If you chose chocolate memories please leave a comment and tell us why (as I am baffled). I expect most would say I would like the few extra years please.

So why not take that choice now, why wait until its too late and you are only looking back in regret?. I hope to find out soon and I will post my thoughts and hopefully an answer as soon as it comes to me, now that I have asked the question.

I still am yet to figure out as I still do a few things that I know are not completely healthy for me. While my habits have changed so that I am now not going to die when I’m 50, I still am aware they will take some years away. Maybe I am just hoping for something that will make it all better.

Maybe hope has something to do with it. Others may call it delusion.

I am here to say these moments, while not pleasant to deal with at the time are actually great turning points. You have reached your limit with a certain way of life and are breaking through it. Something you have always done, no longer seems right and accepting that and changing normally involves some form of break (break apart, break through, break down). It usually occurs when you either burn out from doing something for so long and decide this no longer makes me happy, why am I still doing it, or learning something new that conflicts with a lot of existing beliefs.

Now during these times its great to reflect upon what has caused it and determine your plan of action for the future. It’s also a great time to just rest and do some things that make you happy, whether it be watch a movie, or gardening, or a walk (Exercise actually is great as it will help with your mood).

I don’t know how this affects you, but it normally takes me a few days to get moving positively again and a week or so before I am feeling 100% positive. But things do change for the better. It’s a great eye opening experience. You have questioned a belief or value and broken through it, a tough task to say the least.

I would love to know of others stories and what you have broken through.

It’s the courage to admit when you are wrong.

We all base our decisions of how we rate the reliability of the source, information received and our instincts. But sometimes you gain more information that expands or conflicts with your existing information, its your responsibility to investigate further.

Most people will disregard information that conflicts with their previous knowledge. Our minds can not really cope with being wrong, we are truth finding machines. As proof, is there anything in your mind now that is wrong. Everything in your mind is correct, even if it’s I have this piece of information although I know its incorrect. Everything is a balanced equation. So when we want to accept something new, that is conflicting of something we know, its hard to accept. Why, I’m not sure. It’s easy to learn something new as it will not conflict with anything previous.

This becomes particularly hard to accept if it means you have to accept you did something wrong, especially to a loved one such as a child, such as my previous post when I left my first born to cry in a dark room at night when he was going to bed. But if you choose to accept it, admit you did something wrong, you have the ability to do the right thing in the future.

Staying with something you suspect may be wrong just so you don’t have to admit you did something wrong, doesn’t let you grow and only helps other people feel more comfortable staying where they are. To grow as a person and do good in the world, you must learn to accept you might be wrong some of the time. Having the courage to admit you are wrong and grow as a person is an admirable trait, even if others might not see it. (They just don’t want to accept they are wrong )

And courage can come in all sizes, while it’s unfortunate for most (including myself) that we don’t have enough. Small things such as public speaking or acting, just because you are afraid of what someone else thinks or skydiving or bungie jumping just because there is a small chance that something could go wrong.

Now fear was built into our biology for a reason. We don’t want to jump off a cliff with no parachute, or go and hug a wild polar bear, it keeps us safe. But a lot of fear today is from social pressure and ignorance. As one of my mentor’s brad sugars says, F.E.A.R stands for False Expectations Appearing Real. And that is usually what it is.

Now while all of this can seems insignificant, it has one MAJOR impact on our lives. It stops us going for what we want. Being afraid to do something that would make us happy because we think of all the things that could go wrong. Well why not think of all the things that could go right. And don’t let a stumbling block get you down, keep on going.

Lets take an example, if you read most stories of actors/actresses you will commonly see a similar story. They grew up with normal parents, went to high school, they were grounded, they worked at supermarkets or fast food restaurants all while they practised their talents. Then they make a big move. They go for it. They move state or country to hollywood, they live in poor conditions, they stuggle, taking any reasonable acting job they can find, guest appearances etc. They have the courage to continue, they pursue what they want and don’t give up. And eventually, they start getting bigger parts and more money. Then after a while at that they normally score, what many people refer to as their big break.

Just to highlight their path, a common misconception is that they are completely unknown and struggling and then they hit it really big. You will see in their paths they gradually get better roles as they progress.

So what did they do, they had courage and a goal and they went for it. So what is stopping you. Take the plunge, go for what you want. You know, no matter what situtation you always land on your feet as you are still here.

A great saying I was reaquainted with recently was, “It’s always darkest before the dawn”.

Have the courage to do something others fear, and you too will see the greatness of your passion and determination.

As an adult TV would come on after my children are in bed and not at all in the morning. As my children are still very young I haven’t let them watch TV at all. Yes they will learn about it sometime soon, but it’s much better seeing them in the backyard playing.

While watching TV I was equivalent of a zombie. A blank stare into a small black box or in people’s cases today, a large flat panel on the wall. Using almost no brain capacity and wasting my life away. If I was to look back 50 years from now, what do you think approximately 73,000 hours of tv would have brought me? Nothing much.

So why did I decide to stop watching TV. Big brother 06 was the catalyst for me. I couldn’t take it anymore. Reality TV was doing nothing more than irritating me. So I unplugged the tv aerial (I recently turned it into a phone outlet).

What happened over the next few months. Well I watched DVD’s. Scrubs over and over again (I think I could quote almost each episode). And I dowloaded Stargate and Smallville. On the upside I wasn’t watching any advertisements, which is quite a good thing considering I recently learned that subliminal advertising is actually legal in quite a few countries as long as it is a certain number of frames. These frame rates however still classify it as subliminal and considering the zombie state most people are in, even if it did flash up for a second and was clearly visibile most people would not notice it.

To start curbing my tv watching I would try to put on the tv as late as possible. Each night getting later and later. I also stopped having the tv on if I was doing something else. I know most people like the background noise, but after a few days you easily adjust. Then I was still on my laptop while the tv was on at night. This habit stopped when the tv finally blew up and the only way we can watch tv now is on my laptop. I have decided not to go and purchase another tv.

So now its almost down to just watching a movie on dvd every now and again. Some nights the tv/laptop hasn’t even been turned on. I find I get a lot more work done on the laptop, I play Uno or a board game with my wife and even spend a bit more time cleaning the house. I know the last one isn’t very appealing but I have reclaimed more time to spend with my wife, family and house.

To me the hours I will have spent doing something more worthwhile will be a great thing to look back on in 50 years time, and will give me many more experiences and options. Even if you cut out 1 hour of tv a day, in 50 years time you will save 18,262 hours of your life to something more meaningful.