confessions on the journey

depravity and Divinity

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 17:29:00 +0000

i'm having such a difficult time focusing today - songs are chosen for tonight's practice - an okay (RE)gen meeting last night...talking about regrets and how to deal with them...

now i'm sitting in our worship center - listening to music, probably getting ready to listen to some driscoll - and this quote pops in my head...it's from the advertisement of the david crowder a collision record:

"when our depravity meets His divinity its a beautiful collision."

and now i'm thinking about it and can't get it out of my head - what is the outcome of that collision other than something beautiful? grace? mercy? love? i guess most of all, it should change us - as i was thinking about all this, the song "i'm not alright" starts playing from the rotation of songs on my playlist...

part of the chorus says "i'm not alright, and that's why i need You"...depravity meeting divinity...we are so utterly hopeless and depraved if left to ourselves...people can make the argument all they want that we are inherently good inside...but when push comes to shove, we will choose what is wrong over what is right...maybe that is what's so beautiful about this collision...

facing up to God brings us to the realization of how messed up we really are - and how desperately we need a Savior...and all of us do (whether we're admitting to it or not)...

monumental

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 08:40:00 +0000

i think that the title to this post says it all - in describing this past week, it has been monumental...and mostly so when i think of my oldest daughter.

about a week ago, while i was driving her to school, she made unarguably the most important decision of her life...she asked Jesus into her heart...she became a Christian...and in the short time that has followed she has all but stopped talking about it...

following that morning, she finished her testing for the gifted program at ironwood elementary (i didn't even know they tested kids in kindergarten to see if they were gifted)...according to the tests, she is...and janice and i are crazy proud of her...

then, thursday, she had a line in her first play - it was the kindergarten play at school...she almost didn't make it, but in the end, she said her line and did it so well...

and yesterday...she lost her first tooth...the last seven days have been crazy for her - and she's taking them in stride. going around like it's business as usual...because it is. it's life...and she doesn't know any better except to keep going...

in this life i hope to teach my kids about what it means to live - but, every now and then, they teach me...thanks anika.

Calling

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 06:39:00 +0000

wow...i haven't written anything on my blog since january. i guess it comes and goes in spurts...

so far, this spring has been tumultuous at worst, and just plain out of control on the good days. i don't want to make it sound like things have gone horrible, but it has been way past my comfort zone on many days...

so much so, i have had frequent thoughts of abandoning this...i've wondered what it would be like to completely abandon my "calling"...to completely leave it behind and do something else...something easier...something less taxing on my heart and my mind...

two weeks ago, i think i was pretty much ready to throw in the towel...so, i was asking God what else i could do...what other job would fit me well? i told this to a friend and got laughed at, but i did a career assessment - you know, one of those career helper/planner/guide tests...i was kind of at a loss on what to do...

the results of the inventory were that i should stay in ministry....that best suited me...i couldn't help but laugh out loud...assured now that God definitely had a sense of humor...

right before i took the test i came across this quote:

"Next to faith this is the highest art -- to be content with the calling in which God has placed you."
-Martin Luther

so i've been thinking about this...about being content in the calling that God has given me...even when it's frustrating or difficult or unrewarding...which are trademarks of ministry...

thinking about this has lit a fire under me to continue in ministry, and to strive to do it as best i can...i still have such a long way to go...

An exhausting evening

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 06:55:00 +0000

everything about it was exhausting...dinner and meetings....constantly doing ministry. always a part of something, and always seemingly at the middle (or at least it's what it fees like).

well, whatever - some thoughts about the day...

the meeting in phoenix went pretty well. it's always good to hang out with dusty, danny, and lucas...the content of the meeting was so-so. although dr. lyon did a good job, the input seemed more like complaining that looking for any kind of solution. definitely complaining...and it was complaining done about things that really have no hope of changing, because those things are so deeply woven into the fabric of our denomination...if these guys are so upset about what they don't like, maybe it's time to leave.

fun dinner tonight with some great friends - luke and stacy. luke, it has been a lot of fun working with you, and getting to know you and your family...we got into trouble more times than i can count...each time was worth it. and mother earth (aka, stacy), it has also been great simply getting to know you....

pitched a new website design to the board tonight...for the most part it went really well. approval is good...and now i can make changes to the website and update it a little easier - still working on some logistical things, but those will iron themselves out in time..

tonight, however, i just feel emotionally drained. in ministry i know that these days will come...and it comes from all different directions...

and there are big changes happening within the next week...here we go

the future...

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 03:02:00 +0000

these blogs are confessions...i guess. they're things that have been swirling around in my mind sometimes for days, and other times for not nearly as long as they should have before i let them fly into cyberspace for everyone to read...this particular blog is one that i'm debating about writing...

i'm thinking about the future...the future of my marriage with janice (we'll be married for 7 years in January)...the future of my children...Anika turns 6 on saturday and is almost half way through kindergarten...Gilly will be 5 in March, and we just turned in her registration forms for kindergarten - her and Anika will be going to the same school next year, and Anika will be one of the "bigs"...that is the kids in 1st grade and up (they get to use a bigger, different playground)...and next fall, izzy gets to go to preschool (she'll be 3 in august)...and then there is jaden - the little man turned 1 about a month ago...we'd be content to keep him forever, and let him grow up as one of our own...i think that my grandparents and my cousin (his mother) are making a mistake by taking him back, but all we can do is pray for him and them....these are just a few of the things that i'm thinking about.

i'm thinking about foothills...i'm thankful for them. i really am. i was thinking this evening about the different ministries that i've been involved in...working with the students in ohio, iowa, and indiana...leading worship in those places as well...and now, leading worship at foothills. in each place i've found something not to like...as much as i love my friend tim holman, there were times that i went home and complained to janice about something that tim said or did that i just didn't agree with....the same with iowa and working with steve huecker...indiana was crazy working with jeff - jeff has a way of getting under your skin like no one else i've known in ministry...but his passion for the people that he at times antagonizes makes up for it...i love him like a brother...

and now to foothills...after district conference i resigned...i didn't tell anyone (i'd done it in my mind)...i was ready to move on...things didn't turn our like i'd hoped at conference and pastor jon called me on a few things. how dare he do that?!?!?!? he was upset with me and in turn i was upset with him...before leaving for their motorcycle expedition, he called me into his office....sat me down...and explained to me how i'd done things wrong - i was so upset that i couldn't hold it in....i talked with my wife and another close friend about what had been said...janice didn't say much, but she hurt because i was hurting...my friend took my point of view and so i felt validated...but was i right? i don't see eye to eye with pastor jon on everything...

and then there's luke...he's as stubborn as the day is long. and some days i just want to rip my hair out because of it - there are times when i can't tell if he really cares or not, and it drives me crazy...

tim is creative beyond reason - i think that's why i was frustrated...he was thinking so far outside the box that i just couldn't keep up...that wasn't his fault, it was mine...i want that kind of creativity

steve was very methodical - i wanted to push to move us ahead, and he kept saying that things needed to work slower and in time the change we needed and wanted would come...i want that kind of patience...

jeff was passionate for the lost in a way that i'd never seen...that's what made him hard to deal with some days - he was completely transparent...you knew what he was thinking without question...no pretenses...i want that kind of passion

pastor jon is a shepherd like no other...i think that's why we don't always see eye to eye...he cares for the people of foothills...always looking out for the best and wanting the other leaders to be shepherds too....i want to be that kind of pastor...the kind that not just leads with reckless abandon, but cares enough to shepherd those who need that extra attention...

luke is brutally honest...there are many times that he just doesn't care what you think or how you're going to feel about it later...he just tells you. a pastor needs this trait too....the ability to not sugar-coat things...and just say it like it is, without worrying about offending someone...luke doesn't care about offending you, or about pleasing you...i want that kind of honesty...

as i think about the future and my ministry, i would be wise to take these traits and mold them into who i am...creativity, and patience, and passion, and the heart of a shepherd who carries a big staff without fear of using it...i've complained about all these men, and i hope that in the end, i can learn from them...

reality of ministry

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 03:43:00 +0000

i love doing what i do...each week i get to stand in front of our congregation and lead them in worship of our God...there aren't many experiences in life that can rival the feelings that surround leading worship.

being involved in pastoral ministry is amazing...and at the same time, it can be a crushing experience. i've been talking with a student that i used to pastor back in indiana...she's going through such a difficult time right now. and, in her pain and suffering, there doesn't seem to be anything that i can say to her...anything that will make her feel better...anything that will help her to connect to The Almighty in her pain...it's crushing to me...

it's one thing to have to talk to someone that i'm pastoring, and another thing completely to have to talk to someone that i'm pastoring next to...and feeling like i don't have the right things to say...i know that my friend needs to hear something, i just don't know what it is...i'm at a loss...

realities of ministry...

An Amazing Story in My Study on Purity

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 22:39:00 +0000

i'm doing a study on purity with a friend of mine...in today's study, there is a story of a dragon...

if you are struggling with an addiction of some sort, and are afraid to face it, please read this...

There was once a great and noble King whose land was terrorized by a crafty dragon. Like a massive bird of prey, the scaly beast delighted in ravaging villages with his fiery breath. Hapless victims ran from their burning homes, only to be snatched into the dragon's jaws or talons. Those devoured instantly were deemed more fortunate than those carried back to the dragon's lair to be devoured at his leisure. The King led his sons and knights in many valiant battles against the dragon.

Riding alone in the forest, one of the King's sons heard his name purred low and soft. In the shadows of the ferns and trees, curled among the boulders, lay the dragon. The creature's heavy-lidded eyes fastened on the prince, and the reptilian mouth stretched into a friendly smile.

"Don't be alarmed," said the dragon, as gray wisps of smoke rose lazily from his nostrils.

"I am not what your father thinks."

"What are you, then?" asked the prince, warily drawing his sword as he pulled in the reins to keep his fearful horse from bolting.

"I am pleasure," said the dragon. "Ride on my back and you will experience more than you ever imagined. Come now. I have no harmful intentions. I seek a friend, someone to share flights with me. Have you never dreamed of flying? Never longed to soar in the clouds?"

Visions of soaring high above the forested hills drew the prince hesitantly from his horse. The dragon unfurled one great webbed wing to serve as a ramp to his ridged back. Between the spiny projections, the prince found a secure seat. Then the creature snapped his powerful wings twice and launched them into the sky. The prince's apprehension melted into awe and exhilaration.

From then on, he met the dragon often, but secretly, for how could he tell his father, brothers or the knights that he had befriended the enemy? The prince felt separate from them all. Their concerns were no longer his concerns. Even when he wasn't with the dragon, he spent less time with those he loved and more time alone.

The skin on the prince's legs became calloused from gripping the ridged back of the dragon, and his hands grew rough and hardened. He began wearing gloves to hide the malady. After many nights of riding, he discovered scales growing on the backs of his hands as well. With dread he realized his fate were he to continue, and so he resolved to return no more to the dragon.

But, after a fortnight, he again sought out the dragon, having been tormented with desire. And so it transpired many times over. No matter what his determination, the prince eventually found himself pulled back, as if by the cords of an invisible web. Silently, patiently, the dragon always waited.

One cold, moonless night their excursion became a foray against a sleeping village. Torching the thatched roofs with fiery blasts from his nostrils, the dragon roared with delight when the terrified victims fled from their burning homes. Swooping in, the serpent belched again and flames engulfed a cluster of screaming villages. The prince closed his eyes tightly in an attempt to shut out the carnage.

In the pre dawn hours, when the prince crept back from his dragon trysts, the road outside his father's castle usually remained empty. But not tonight. Terrified refugees streamed into the protective walls of the castle. The prince attempted to slip through the crowd to close himself in his chambers, but some of the survivors stared and pointed toward him.

"He was there," one woman cried out, "I saw him on the back of the dragon." Others nodded their heads in angry agreement. Horrified, the prince saw that his father, the King, was in the courtyard holding a bleeding child in his arms. The King's face mirrored the agony of his people as his eyes found the prince's. The son fled, hoping to escape into the night, but the guards apprehended him as if he were a common thief. They brought him to the great hall where his father sat solemnly on the throne. The people on every side railed against the prince.

"Banish him!" he heard one of his own brothers angrily cry out.

"Burn him alive!" other voices shouted.

As the king rose from his throne, bloodstains from the wounded shone darkly on his royal robes. The crowd fell silent in expectation of his decree. The prince, who could not bear to look into his father's face, stared at the flagstones of the floor.

"Take off your gloves and your tunic," the King commanded. The prince obeyed slowly, dreading to have his metamorphosis uncovered before the kingdom. Was his shame not already enough? He had hoped for a quick death without further humiliation. Sounds of revulsion rippled through the crowd at the sight of the prince's thick, scaled skin and the ridge growing along his spine.

The king strode toward his son, and the prince steeled himself, fully expecting a back handed blow even though he had never been struck so by his father.

Instead, his father embraced him and wept as he held him tightly. In shocked disbelief, the prince buried his face against his father's shoulder.

"Do you wish to be freed from the dragon, my son?"

The prince answered in despair, "I wished it many times, but there is no hope for me."

"Not alone," said the King. "You cannot win against the dragon alone."

"Father, I am no longer your son. I am half beast," sobbed the prince.

But his father replied, "My blood runs in your veins. My nobility has always been stamped deep within your soul."

With his face still hidden tearfully in his father's embrace, the prince heard the King instruct the crowd, "The dragon is crafty. Some fall victim to his wiles and some to his violence. There will be mercy for all who wish to be freed. Who else among you has ridden the dragon?"

The prince lifted his head to see someone emerge from the crowd. To his amazement, he recognized an older brother, one who had been lauded throughout the kingdom for his onslaughts against the dragon in battle and for his many good deeds. Others came, some weeping, others hanging their heads in shame.

The King embraced them all.

"This is our most powerful weapon against the dragon," he announced. "Truth. No more hidden flights. Alone we cannot resist him."

— Melinda Reinicke, Parables for Personal Growth (San Diego, CA: Recovery Publications, Inc., 1993), pp. 5-9.

COF is getting started...some things to consider.

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:54:00 +0000

1. what is the holistic plan for this new worship gathering as it relates to the whole church?

2. what happens in terms of spiritual formation and evangelism beyond the worship gathering?

3. what is the role of our senior pastor and board in all of this?

4. what will be the specific points of integration between COF and the rest of the church?

5. how will intergenerational relationships be encouraged and developed?

6. how will existing children, youth, college, and singles at foothills be impacted?

7. how will we keep healthy lines of communication between our senior pastor and the rest of church leadership?

8. since this is meant to be "missional", how do we keep it from being something that simply attracts the christians in our area?

9. how will we measure success?

Handling Criticism

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 16:00:00 +0000

was reading over some old emails this morning and came across one from a few years ago...one that i kept as a reminder of what to do when dealing with people who rarely have anything positive to say, or who will use you as their verbal punching bag...take a minute and read...

Handling Criticism

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Colossians 3:23-24

I was watching the movie The Incredibles and was amused by a scene where his boss criticized Mr. Incredible. In the scene, he then throws his boss through several walls and, of course, ends up being fired. The scene reminds me that both criticism and our dislike for being criticized are common. In fact, I don’t know anyone who likes being criticized. While it is true that a positive type of criticism exists – one that we refer to as “constructive-criticism” – most of us are much better acquainted with the negative version of criticism. This is the type of criticism that is meant to hurt, damage, belittle or tear down another person. When delivered, it is often accompanied by negative tone and attitude. Perhaps this is the type of criticism with which you are all too familiar. The question I want you to consider today is, how should a Christ-follower handle criticism?

While thinking over this issue, I came across a poem that was reportedly found hanging on the wall in the orphanage founded by Mother Theresa. I think it captures idea of handling criticism with graceful balance.

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered;Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;Succeed anyway.

People may cheat you;Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;It is never between you and them anyway.

I love the line in the poem “it’s between you and God” because, in the end, so much of life boils down to that truth. Sure, we can desire to get along with everyone and have everyone like us in return. We know by our own experiences, however, that life just doesn’t work that way. For any number of reasons, people can react to us negatively with criticism. When people are critical of us, we need to remember the truth of the Scripture that we belong to the Lord – and our responses to life’s situations boil down to living life to please the Lord. So, when someone criticizes you, see if there is some nugget of truth in the criticism. If there is, own up to it and address it in your life and with the person who brought it to light. If not, move on, continuing to do the best you can to live your life in a way that honors God. Ultimately, this is the most important measurement of our lives and the means by which we can handle and survive the criticisms that come our way.

GOING DEEPER:
1. How do you normally react to criticism?
2. Recognize that so much of living life boils down to “it is between you and God.” How can that make a difference in how you handle criticism?

FURTHER READING:Romans 14:7-8; 1 Peter 3:13-17

This devotional was written by Jim Liebelt.

sin and guilt

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 21:17:00 +0000

i was reading out of my current Leadership magazine...reading an article by John Ortberg entitled 'The Sin Tamer', i came across this:

Awakening Healthy Guilt

As a leader I have to ask myself, "what are the sins in my congregation (and my life) that no one feels guilty over?"

Do I have the courage to awaken guilt?

Taylor Branch wrote how in Montgomery, Alabama, in the 1950's bus drivers would accept money from African-American riders, but then would make them disembark and walk on the sidewalk to re-enter through the rear door lest they touch a white person going down the center aisle.

Sometimes, for the fun of cruelty, drivers would take the money and drive off while the person was walking toward the back door, leaving them without fare or transportation.

There was a sin of anger here. But it was not that black people got angry.

It was that white people did not.

Worse, it was that white people, who read the Bible and worshiped in church, did not rise up in fury to demand justice.

Are we lifting up and recognizing and encouraging the sin-convicting ministry of the Holy Spirit?

At Willow Creek recently, Bill Hybels preached a series called "Enough." After one of the sermons, he challenged members of the congregations to raise their hands if they were willing to surrender their possessions and lifestyles fully to God and actually decide to use their resources to serve the poor and honor God. There was a time for public declaration of intent.

Then Bill said he wanted to have a word with all the folks who did not raise their hands. And this is what he said: "I hope you have a terrible afternoon. And then I hope you have a terrible evening. I hope the Holy Spirit keeps after you, and you have to keep thinking this one through, until you're able to raise your hand as well."

later...Ortberg continues with this:

...what's most difficult about sin isn't so much what to do about sin in the congregation I serve. It's what to do about the sin in me! The hard part of sin is my sin.

I get angry at people for not doing what I want. I avoid confrontation I know is needed because I want to avoid pain. I am apathetic toward injustice. I lust. I use other people. I manipulate. I get defensive. I am ungrateful for blessings. I withdraw...

...the sins I'm aware of are constantly tempting me. The Bible says, "We wrestle. . . ." We wrestle - not against flesh and blood. We wrestle - and as we faithfully wrestle, God allows us victories along the way. We wrestle - and as we wrestle, a Friend greater than we know is somehow at work wrestling in us and for us and through us.

The greatest sin would be to stop wrestling.

a need to get honest

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 20:15:00 +0000

i'm reading No Perfect People Allowed by John Burke and there have been some interesting things that have come up...i want to share an excerpt with you from a section about creating dialogue with those who doubt:

What Would Jesus Do?
The Pharisees of Jesus' day were absolutely certain of all they believed. If asked, they would say they knew God. They knew what he wanted of them with certainty. They followed the Law of Moses impeccably, and they lived within the walls of their religious culture confidently. And those who did not conform to their culture were cast out, unwelcome "sinners." They had a very "us-them" perception of the world. They often boasted about how wonderful it was to be the chosen, compared to those "messed up" people out there who didn't know the Lord. They subtly, and not so subtly, looked down upon and talked down to those who did not hold their beliefs. And rightfully so they thought, because "We have the truth! We are right!" But Jesus scolded them because they wouldn't lift a finger to help those on the outside. They had no genuine love for people different than themselves. Their chief failure was their failure to see that "chosen by God" never meant chosen for merit, but chosen for a responsibility.
Enter Jesus, " friend of the worst sort of sinners!" He, whose culture could not be more different than ours, set aside the culture of heaven to enter the culture of humanity. Jesus adapted to the lowliest class to seek, serve, and save people. He chastised the religious leaders of his day who were unbending with their traditions by quoting Isaiah and saying, "'These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me'...You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions [religious culture] of men."
And what are the commands of God? Jesus summed them up in two phrases, Love God, love people. Stop and ask yourself as a Christ-follower and especially if you are a leader: How much do I really love those who are not in the family of faith? How willing am I to adapt my cultural comforts to be able to create a culture of dialogue for those who do not hold my cherished beliefs? Am I comfortable if they hang our and question and doubt in our church or in my small group or ministry? Am I willing to admit where I have doubts or uncertainty as well as where I find confidence in Christ? Do I subtly consider myself "better than" or "more together" than those who are not Christ-followers?* Are nonbelievers attracted to my friends and me just as the "sinners" of Jesus' day were attracted to him?

* "For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?" -1 Corinthians 4:7

day 3 and counting

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 18:42:00 +0000

so, i'm in the middle of day three of the experiment...the first two days were amazing and difficult at the same time...

on the first night, i was being tempted to get on my computer and look at porn, and i was fighting to say no...just as the battle was at it's hottest point, the alarm went off on my phone for me to connect with God...it was amazing

several people from the church and back home are doing the experiment...every chance i get, i'm telling others about it, in hopes that they'll be able to connect with God in a way that is real and personal...

A few question for the 60-60

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 05:54:00 +0000

these questions are taken from Burke's book Soul Revolution...a good read...

Preparing for the 60-60 Experiment
1. Take a sheet of paper and make a list of all the things you long for in life. Don't edit out anything; whether you think it's a good desire or not, just write.

2. Now look at your list and circle the three to five most important things on your list (what you don't want to live without). Why are those things most important to you? What do you hope they will bring you? Is there a deeper spiritual quality you're hoping that desire will bring? Is that spiritual quality a top priority on your list?

3. If it's true that our deepest longings are good and from God, how might God want to meet the deepest longings that your top priorities reveal? (if you have someone to discuss this with, please do***hoping to do something like this in our community groups).

4. Do you trust that God wants to meet your deepest longings? What fears do you have in all-out trusting Him? What might you gain from fully trusting God for the next 60 days? What might you lose?

***some things to think about and to answer - I'm here to encourage on this trip that we're taking together. there are some study tools that I came across on www.soulrevolution.com - check it out. create a profile (it's free) and gather up as much info as you can....read the mini-blogs that others are posting, and see how God is impacting their lives through this....

60-60 Experiment

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 04:44:00 +0000

it's sunday night and i'm thinking about the 60-60...it's an experiment by Gateway Church out of Austin...

John Burke is the pastor of Gateway....this is his description of the experiment...

"For the next 60 days, try to stay in a continuous, honest conversation with God, willing to do his will moment by moment.Set a watch or alarm to beep every 60 minutes, and put up sticky notes & reminders around your home, car & office, as a reminder to stay connected.Try to turn your thoughts back to God all throughout the day, as often as you can. This simple conscious contact with God isn't easy, but it's all you have to do...Even if you're not yet convinced this is true, try it. Every 60 minutes, stop and recall "God is with me right now..." and let that propel you to ask God "Show me your will this next moment."

so...here i go...

and i'm asking those that are a part of COF (and whoever else wants to) to join in with me for the next 60 days...

xxxchurch.com

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 16:12:00 +0000

it is advertised as the #1 Christian porn site...and they are just that.

Pastor Craig Gross and his team are reaching out to people who are stuck in either an addiction to porn, or in stuck in the industry itself...what God is doing through them is nothing short of miraculous...

anyone who is struggling (men or women...doesn't matter) needs to take a look at this site...

www.xxxchurch.com

also, to see what their ministry team is doing in vegas, watch the episodes @

xxxchurch.tv

Anika's first day of kindergarten

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 01:38:00 +0000

the first day of kindergarten is over - and we all survived. anika wasn't altogether sure about what to think this morning...she was excited and nervous - and i worried and prayed the whole day. when i picked her up she was quiet about how her day went...and so, i thought that things may have gone pretty bad...

but, as soon as she got home, she opened up...and was really excited about everything....it was a good day (and we get to do it all over again tomorrow)

;o)

Holding Back

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Fri, 31 Jul 2009 17:03:00 +0000

there are several people from back in the day that i wish i could have spent time talking to...

of course, sitting across the table from Jesus in the flesh would be tops on my list - but I also would have loved to have to talked with Paul and Peter...it would have been interesting to have an in-depth conversation with guys like Spurgeon, and Moody, and Luther...

the more i read Oswald Chambers, the more he rises on that list...in today's devo, in a round about way asks if we are holding anything back from Christ...if there is anything that needs to be revealed in us that is not what He would want, or how he would have it be...

so...is there? is there anything that you're holding back? is there anything inside of you that is not "entirely His"?

July 31, 2009

Becoming Entirely His

Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing —James 1:4

Many of us appear to be all right in general, but there are still some areas in which we are careless and lazy; it is not a matter of sin, but the remnants of our carnal life that tend to make us careless. Carelessness is an insult to the Holy Spirit. We should have no carelessness about us either in the way we worship God, or even in the way we eat and drink.

Not only must our relationship to God be right, but the outward expression of that relationship must also be right. Ultimately, God will allow nothing to escape; every detail of our lives is under His scrutiny. God will bring us back in countless ways to the same point over and over again. And He never tires of bringing us back to that one point until we learn the lesson, because His purpose is to produce the finished product. It may be a problem arising from our impulsive nature, but again and again, with the most persistent patience, God has brought us back to that one particular point. Or the problem may be our idle and wandering thinking, or our independent nature and self-interest. Through this process, God is trying to impress upon us the one thing that is not entirely right in our lives.

We have been having a wonderful time in our studies over the revealed truth of God’s redemption, and our hearts are perfect toward Him. And His wonderful work in us makes us know that overall we are right with Him. "Let patience have its perfect work . . . ." The Holy Spirit speaking through James said, "Now let your patience become a finished product." Beware of becoming careless over the small details of life and saying, "Oh, that will have to do for now." Whatever it may be, God will point it out with persistence until we become entirely His.

what is success (and/or failure)?

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 22:12:00 +0000

today's devo by Chambers leads me to ask this question: what is success? how do you define it? how do you define failure? Chambers makes a good point today...

"He made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side . . ." —Mark 6:45

"We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.

"What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish— His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see "Him walking on the sea" with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see "Him walking on the sea" ( Mark 6:49 ). It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God.

"God’s training is for now, not later. His purpose is for this very minute, not for sometime in the future. We have nothing to do with what will follow our obedience, and we are wrong to concern ourselves with it. What people call preparation, God sees as the goal itself.

"God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious."

getting real

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 21:58:00 +0000

it's sunday afternoon...and, i'm taking inventory of the day...

this morning seemed like a great morning - having the opportunity to preach is always something that get's me pumped...but, this morning was different...

i usually feel really great and relieved after i'm done preaching...but i'm not usually as transparent and forceful as i was this morning...last week i encouraged amanda to be brave with her message...but, i was terrified this morning when i stood up to preach...my mind is swirling...

i felt passion this morning...passion coming out of me and filling me like i've never felt before...
i don't know what's going on in me....

i like it, but i'm scared...and i don't even know if it really went well...i keep second guessing myself...feeling kinda gun shy...like i'm worried about saying the wrong thing...

confessions i guess...

Flagstaff

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 05:39:00 +0000

i'm quitting foothills (just joking)...janice and i took an unexpected road trip to flagstaff yesterday...it was gorgeous!! i didn't want to leave...the scenery was beautiful...the atmosphere of the town was incredible...

i'm trying to figure out how i can live there and commute to foothills for work...i don't think it's gonna work though...

here's to dreaming...

Journey Through Proverbs - Chapter 1

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 19:53:00 +0000

here are some thoughts (profound or not)...i hope that all of you are journaling as well...

in the ESV, it gives the title "The Beginning of Knowledge" - which i think is a great way to start a book that is camped around wisdom, knowledge, understanding, etc...as i read through the first 7 verses (slowly read through them) the words grab me...this is written so that i could know wisdom (or Wisdom with a capital W)...so that i could receive instruction...so that my simple (naive - as amanda put) mind could gain prudence...

all things that i need...

...so that i could understand the words of the wise (it's one thing to hear them...it's something completely different to understand them and put them into action)...

and then, verse 7..."The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction." so, a fool, has no fear for the Lord...no fear of the Lord...they're in their own little world...living like there are no consequences....making choices without regard for what may happen next - this is the generation and culture and world in which we live...

someone who makes choices without regard for consequences...that could be a brief definition of a fool...

chapter 1 continues with a brief look at the lure of the sinful life - preceeded by a stern warning from a loving father...i can see him now, telling his son...there are consequences to what you do...don't be like them - i can see the father giving explicit examples to his son (and the mother chiming in, in agreement with her husband)....and maybe the son doesn't get it...but, then, verse 18 says that they are lying "in wait for their own blood"...it doesn't get much more graphic than that...if the son doesn't get it by now, he may never get it...i wonder if that is how my Father feels about me...

but then there's Wisdom....crying aloud in the street...God hasn't given up on me yet or anyone else...Wisdom is crying out that there is time - but, if I choose not to listen, my fate is deserved...i have chosen a path that leads to death...and i can't say that i didn't have warning...because the voice of Wisdom was there the entire time...i don't have any excuses...

what choice will i make?

profound truth by C.S. Lewis

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 21:44:00 +0000

i'm reading a book entitled Cross-Cultural Servanthood...on page 29 C.S. Lewis is quoted saying:

"If anyone would like to acquire humility, I can, I think, tell him the first step.
The first step is to realize that one is proud. And a biggesh step, too. At least,
nothing whatever can be done before it. If you think you are not conceited,
it means you are very conceited indeed." - C.S. Lewis

so...what is your humility like? i'm asking myself that question right now...is it an arrogant/distorted type of humility (which is one that many hold), or is it Christlike?

others can't see our motives...only our actions...

My Utmost - July 12th

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 14:24:00 +0000

my internet homepage is set for Oswald Chambers' daily devo called "My Utmost For His highest"...maybe some of you read this as well...if you don't, shame on you (just kidding)...

today's caught my attention, and i felt the need to share it...

The Spiritually Self-Seeking Church

Reconciliation means the restoring of the relationship between the entire human race and God, putting it back to what God designed it to be. This is what Jesus Christ did in redemption. The church ceases to be spiritual when it becomes self-seeking, only interested in the development of its own organization. The reconciliation of the human race according to His plan means realizing Him not only in our lives individually, but also in our lives collectively. Jesus Christ sent apostles and teachers for this very purpose— that the corporate Person of Christ and His church, made up of many members, might be brought into being and made known. We are not here to develop a spiritual life of our own, or to enjoy a quiet spiritual retreat. We are here to have the full realization of Jesus Christ, for the purpose of building His body.

Am I building up the body of Christ, or am I only concerned about my own personal development? The essential thing is my personal relationship with Jesus Christ— ". . . that I may know Him. . ." ( Philippians 3:10 ). To fulfill God’s perfect design for me requires my total surrender— complete abandonment of myself to Him. Whenever I only want things for myself, the relationship is distorted. And I will suffer great humiliation once I come to acknowledge and understand that I have not really been concerned about realizing Jesus Christ Himself, but only concerned with knowing what He has done for me.

My goal is God Himself, not joy nor peace, Nor even blessing, but Himself, my God.

Am I measuring my life by this standard or by something less?

Porn Again Christian

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 18:07:00 +0000

this post goes out mostly to men...because the majority of those that look at porn are guys, so...

whether you're a Christian or not, or you believe that porn is normal or detrimental or art or whatever, and you're a guy, you need to read this...

the book is called Porn Again Christian, by Mark Driscoll - pastor of mars hill church in seattle...here's the link:

http://relit.org/porn_again_christian/toc.php

it is a very straightforward discussion about porn and masturbation...Driscoll goes on to talk about how destructive it is and can be for you (the porn-watcher), your wife and family, and your relationships with God and everyone else...

if you're a guy, take a little time of the next couple of weeks and read this...tell the other men you know about it...

if you're a woman, and you're married - mention it to your husband...or an adult son...

this issue is pandemic...especially in the church, and no one wants to talk about it....no one wants to step forward....why? because men are afraid of being shunned...

i have struggled with this in the past, and the only way to bring a stop to it, is to bring it to light...get some accountability...get some encouragement...

so...get started....quit being just male, and start being a man - we can do this together!

Porn Again Christian by Mark Driscoll

Pray Like Jesus

noreply@blogger.com (Chris) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 20:14:00 +0000

i'm listening to a series on prayer by mark driscoll - it's something that i would recommend every listen to...take time out of your busyness, and your crazy schedule, and listen to this...it's a series, but i think that you'll be blessed simply by listening to the first one...

http://www.marshillchurch.org/media/pray-like-jesus