A Trespass of Swine» A Trespass of Swine

Hog Haute Couture for After the Snoutbreak

2009-06-14T15:09:10Z

“Fashion, by which what is really fantastic becomes for a moment the universal.”

Lord Henry, in The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

You might think writing here about Swine Flu in June of ‘09 is dated… Journalism news reports of Swine Flu have already faded below the fold or further, though it was only identified in April of this year. But Swine Flu lingers on – the eternal biological mysteries of DNA mutation and re-assortment continue as relentless as the butcher’s blade.

Called by any other of its names, Swine Flu will remain as threatening. It is an influenza virus – one of our most ancient and formidable foes. Influenza forms are not going away. Fortunately, just as Swine Flu was recently fashionable news, so now there are fashions for Swine Flu. And as Swine Flu is entrenched, we had best suit up for the siege.

We humans have a tendency to take the things we fear and subvert them into something less threatening so that we can own that fear. A favorite means to take ownership is to use humor to undermine our fear. Faced with Swine Flu, we laugh about the coming Aporkalypse, Hamageddon, Hamdemic, Pink Plague or Snoutbreak – caricatures of decimation.

And since the designers and devisers of our fashions continue to weave, stitch and cut with full authority, the muse of Hog Haute Couture must soon co-opt our fears and have Swine Flu Fashions consecrated in Paris. For fashion itself is both the child of its time and a viral plague.

Many of the current Swine Flu fashions are beautifully, darkly illustrative of our feigned indifference to both the flu and our imaginings of Dark Ages plague and massive socio-industrial collapse. And so when we see new designs on ties or t-shirts, designs inspired by global panic, we want that subversion of our fear. And conveniently, as shown here, it is something money can buy.

Fashion provides an easy way to embolden yourself. Even those who don’t need to wear a tie, or seldom were t-shirts, may suddenly feel the need to do so, clicking the PayPal link on the checkout page and immediately feeling clothed in armor. And don’t think I’m being cynical. PayPal is paying these folks for my orders, too, as I literally follow suit.

The Swine Flu virus is ubiquitous as its namesake. It is Porcs sans frontières – pork without borders. It can be born around the globe in days and strikes fortuitously with the tactics of a professional partisan. And these fashions we wear out into the world – our armor – are available to almost anyone who sees them on line or on others. And in that manner the message of our feigned indifference gets spread just like, well, just like the virus.

Some fashion sources:

“I survived the Swine Flu Pandemic” T-shirt by DemoteControl. Get it and “be happier than a disease-free pig in mud”
“I Swear, it’s just a cold!” T-shirt by mobii.
“International symbol inspired by global panic” T-shirt by monkeychick, a graphic designer working out of Melbourne.
Terminal Ties and the H1N1 Snout Mask were by Created by Bethany Shorb, a renegade Detroit artist. They depict the Swine flu viruses attached and replicated at the nodes of six conjoined international airport terminal diagrams.
“Not Another Swine Flu Cartoon “ by David Stuart, a freelance cartoonist and stay at home Dad often found with three day beard and tatty clothes.
And for a protective H1N1 Chem Suit kinda’ like what I have illustrated here, try the Partners in grime at New Pig Corporation.

Obamicon Oink

2009-06-06T17:30:12Z

I recently succumbed the dual influences of self-gratification and the desire to be a mettlesome member of popular culture and created these two images. I would not have chosen this particular medium, except that I discovered a web app that made it fun and easy. The initial inspiration for the app was the Obama HOPE poster from the 2009 U.S. Presidential elections.

Frank Shepard Fairey (b. 1970) is a street artist and graphic designer who created HOPE and a series of other posters supporting Barack Obama’s 2008 candidacy for President. Fairey’s iconic Barack Obama “HOPE” poster has been called “the most efficacious American political illustration since ‘Uncle Sam Wants You!’” [Schjeldahl, Peter]

Now you can indulge yourself with an active part of something greater … Test the waters of the gorilla marketing or the tagging street scene in your own community. Imagine the feelings of empowerment you will enjoy as you mythologize your own countenance, crusade, or just some wanton craze.

The first step towards that empowerment certainly requires that you create an influential and potentially iconic image. And if the rest of your life has put a stiffening hold on your creativity, why not simply modify Fairey’s proven method?

The folks at Paste Magazine have made this easy. They created the web app Obamicon.Me where you can upload an image (or use your web cam) and then “Obamafy” it. The app lets you upload, manipulate and then save your images at their site. You will need to ‘join’ with a password and email address, but then you can view everyone else’s works, vote on the most iconic and create and share a list of favorites.

Vitruvian Swine and Flying Pigs – Redux

2009-05-28T22:14:57Z

The image of the Vitruvian Swine idled in my imagination for several years before it debuted on Porkopolis.org. It eventually appeared in its now classic form with an accompanying blog entry as The Vitruvian Swine. While perfecting my version, I discovered that many other folk have independently arrived at a similar conception of da Vinci and the swine. I have stumbled upon many other versions; and recently I found a vast portal to Vitruvian diversity.

But none of these have appealed to my inner oinkeological nature so much as the swine at Matt Buck’s Hack web site. Matt is an illustrator, animator and journalist. He is also an enthusiastic admirer of the flying pig. Amidst his resume, portfolio and blog, Matt includes many cartoon tributes to the pig. Matt explains that the pig “seems to have appointed himself as my corporate branding,” and adds that in his blog, “I chronicle aspects of my own life and my love of flying things – including pigs.”

The flying pigs on Matt’s site are the visitor’s personal escorts through the details of Matt’s expertise on the hoof. The Vitruvian styling is but one of their many performances. They deliver mail, route traffic, proffer introspection and manage Matt’s affairs.

As drawn by Matt, these flying pigs are warm yet mischievous; and as all flying pigs should be, they are signposts that engender good will and the promise of new possibilities, like the unexpected offer of a cup of tea and cakes from a congenial new friend. Visit Hack. In this world fraught with oinkst we can all use another pal.

Post Script: Matt’s “Vitruvian Pig” does have wings, and coincidentally, I am working on an experimental version of my own Vitruvian Swine with flight capabilities. Pre-launch testing is being carried now. Below is a blueprint of the current design:

All the Hack images included here are © Matt Buck. Please contact him for rights to reproduction.

A Brief History of Pigs and Flight

2009-05-04T11:05:15Z

276 BC

“If a pig can not fly, then it walks.”

~ Porculus (327 – 291 BC)
The Pigaleian (276 BC)

1553

“Pigs flie in the ayre with their tails forward…”

~ John Withals
A Shorte Dictionarie for Yonge Begynners (1553)

ca. 1620s

“Pigs might fly, but they are very unlikely birds.”

~ a popular British euphemism (ca. 1620s)

1871

“The time has come,” the Walrus said, / To talk of many things: / Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, / Of cabbages and kings, / And why the sea is boiling hot, / And whether pigs have wings.”

~ Edward Lear (1812-1888)
The Owl and the Pussycat (1871)

1906

“RABBLE, n.: in a republic, those who exercise a supreme authority tempered by fraudulent elections. The rabble is like the sacred Simurgh, of Arabian fable — omnipotent on condition that it do nothing. (The word is Aristocratese, and has no exact equivalent in our tongue, but means, as nearly as may be, “soaring swine.”

~ Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914?)
The Devil’s Dictionary (1906)

1909

“The first pig to fly in an aeroplane was taken up for a joyride in a biplane by Lord Brabazon, holder of the first pilot license in Britain.”

~ TIMES,, London (1909).

1923

“But it is only men, especially wise men, who discuss whether pigs can fly; we have no particular proof that pigs ever discuss it.”

~ G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936)
Fancies Versus Facts (1923)

1928

“Owl,” said Pooh, “Could you fly up to the letter-box with Piglet on your back?”

“No,” said Piglet quickly, “He couldn’t.”

Owl explained to Pooh about the necessary Dorsal Muscles. Piglet hurriedly added that he had been getting much bigger lately, “so it’s no good thinking about it.”

~ A.A. Milne (1882-1956)
The House at Pooh Corner (1928)

1991

“The flavor of Carefree Sugarless Gum… How long will it last? It’ll last ’till pigs fly.”

~ Radio advertisement (1991)

1992

“A pig who doesn’t fly is just an ordinary pig”

~ Hayao Miyazaki (b. 1941)
Porco Rosso (1992)

1994

“Pork — the other white meat. Leaner. Healthier. We’re going where no pig has gone before. Come along. Take that one small step… Buy pork!”

~ National Pork Producers Council
an American Trade Organization (ca. 1994).

1996

“Don’t discount flying pigs before you have a good air defense.”

~ jvh@clinet.FI (ca.1996)

1997

“The idea of the flying pig… of that most earthly and sod-rooting of mammals flying on wings… may be my aesthetic writ small.”

~ Stan Rice (1942-2002)
Paintings (1997)

1999

“[the swine represent] the angelic spirits of all the pigs that were slaughtered and were building blocks of Cincinnati’s prosperity. So they’re up there paying one last tribute — singing the ‘Hallelujah Chorus’ — to all their (dead) brethren who flowed into the river.”

~ Andrew Leicester (b. 1948)
Cincinnati Enquirer (Friday, May 07, 1999)

2001

“We just want investors to know that while past performance is no guarantee of future results, with our history of building shareholder value, we think we can keep this pig flying.”

~ Smithfield Foods, Inc
web based press release (2001)

2008

“The aerodynamic potential of pigs has long been debated. Is that plump body a proper fuselage? Can a curvilinear tail assembly function as a rudder? Will cloven appendages withstand the stress of landing? And, eh… Just where are the wings? Perhaps only the Walrus knows.”

~ D.E. Schultz
Porkopolis.org; introduction to ‘Flight’ section of quotations collection for the site’s 2008 redesign

Life as a pig, in two parts

2009-04-18T20:37:40Z

The procession of life is a pilgrimage like that of pig-bearing initiates to the cave of the Eleusinian Mysteries, its undisclosed but inevitable purpose being the education of the mind to see and accept what the gods have made manifest.

Alas, not all who wonder are pilgrims. Hedonists abound, and the elemental bearings of moral and mental education are often set off course by the pursuits of pleasurableness and exhilaration.

Here two small adventures illustrative of life as a human imagining life as a pig. Pilgrims or hedonists, you decide…

PART 1 – a man volunteers to live as a pig

“My new home was about three metres wide and 11 metres long, with a concrete floor covered in mud, straw and you can guess what else. Knowing I would be staying there (apart from surprise excursions like to artificially inseminate a sow) for a few days was pretty daunting.” — Richard da Costa

The BBC television series My Life as an Animal will feature an episode “My life with the pigs” on the 14th of May, 2009. Richard da Costa, a corporate communications consultant and actor, is the brave Dr. Dolittle wannabe who will volunteered to experience life as farm-raised pig for four very long days and nights.

A video preview is available at the BBC site if you have an IP from Great Britain. If not, Brits and non-Brits can view another video and read an excerpt of this bizarre adventure at the BBC NEWS Magazine site.

PART 2 – Dolly Parton shares a pig suckling story

“…they found me over here. I had moved the little pig’s nose and I was down there… just nursin’ with the rest of ‘em. So I’ve been a pig all my life. It’s true!” — Dolly Parton

Here’s a Girls Gone Hog Wild segment from a recent 60 Minutes episode where country music star Dolly Parton confides to Morley Safer that as a young child she once suckled at an old sow on the family farm.

Morley’s hoggish snort at the realization of where her storyline is headed is almost as priceless as Dolly’s admission.

Dolly Partons Pig Tale

Bacon Janes

2009-04-12T04:44:01Z

The laughing gods made pigs and contrived that they walk this earth on the animal equivalent of high heels. Consequently, pigs don’t normally wear shoes. In fact, the idea seems almost contrary to reason, even if one little saddleback piglet on a farm near Bedale, North Yorkshire is trying to be the exception (video here).

Artist Jesse Draper’s photostream on flickr is a meditative journey through evocative portraiture, taxidermy, fashion and footwear. Jesse has created an entire collection of woman’s shoe designs – like Bacon Janes to the left – that incorporate not just animal leather, but animal shapes.

Any woman, especially when handling pigs, could just as easily and unselfconsciously wear these Bacon Janes, or most any other shoe design in Jesse’s collection as she could a pair of red strap heels.

And finally, I noticed that many of Jesse’s shoe images include a descriptive poem by author and former secondary educator, Sam Beeson. Sadly, the Bacon Janes were noticeably verseless, and I have created this:

4 legs, 2 legs
Orwell’s maxim on legs
shirked the shoes,
So some swine
leave their pettitoes out.
Mud on boots or pig’s skin,
each must choose.
While the butchers tout
trotters deemed stout.

Financial Woes? There’s a pig for that!

2009-04-05T20:32:38Z

4 Legs Good – 2 Legs Bad

There are still some banks with an untarnished reputation as the first quarter of 2009 rolls out. Forget UBS, AIG and Citi and think piggy. Just like the home vegetable garden and deciding to keep that used car, piggy banks are making a comeback as the world’s financial woes continue.

The trusted financial tool of generations of children the world over, piggy banks are being re-considered by millions as a savings tool. Portable, stashable, and eminently amenable to withdrawal 24-7, piggy banks are fashionable again. Don’t trust those bonus-focused big bankers. Trust your pig!

New Breeds and Advanced Genetics

As our pecuniary challenges continue grow, some visionaries arise, They are driven to create personal wealth for themselves and others with a methodology that incorporates art, engineering and design. In this age of suspicion, can anyone convince folks to spend money in order to save money? Perhaps, but only if you can improve on such a simple reliable receptacle for collecting bills and loose change as the piggy bank:

Laugh and Learn Piggy Bank from http://www.fisher-price.com/

Just as the Pre-Raphaelites desired a move back to the beauty and simplicity of the Medieval world in their art, you can educate your child in saving money with a move back to a basic yet contemporary piggy bank.

This toy concedes to materialism only because you must first buy it, and only concedes to technology through safety and educational concerns.

The Copilcus Piggy Bank from www.artlebedev.com/

Here is a white ceramic modern piggy bank. The simple addition of the plus sign in lieu of the usual slot adds a whole new meaning and look to this classic form.

This piggy bank is a clear reminder that “plus” savings are far better than “minus” savings.

Pig E Bank from www.vat19.com/

Ka-ching. The money goes into this piggy bank and the bank keeps track of how much is stored inside via an external digital readout. And this porker talks whenever you put money into it. Available in pink or purple or chrome, which is perhaps the new pink.

Pig E Bank also accepts paper bills, but doesn’t not count them; probably because bills are inserted in a special slot under the tail…

Posh Pig Piggy Bank from www.budproduct.com/

Feeling the need to start stashing your cash somewhere nice, maybe even somewhere posh? These Posh Piggy Banks are collectibles with a smooth vinyl exterior, all decorated in different motifs and finished with a slit at the top and bottom stopper.

The Posh Pig may be just the place to store all your laundry coins or amusement tokens, but sorry, Plinko chips won’t fit, and yes, “collectibles” in the paragraph above is a pun.

Hungry Porkers Proliferate

Piggy banks have always been a simple personal finance application. Clickity-clank and you’ve stashed your cash. Pop-out or half-twist the bottom plug or rap the pig with a hammer and your cash is in your hand again.

Now, banking institutions want to re-claim a portion of that position in our lives that has been held by the trusted piggy bank. Pig imagery is being utilized by banking institutions more than ever before in order to re-build their reputations as worthy of our trust.

Dan outside CHASE Bank at 386 Park Ave S.; New York, NY

In a clear play to our subliminal childhood association of piggy banks and safe money, the grown-up financial institutions are resurrecting piggy bank symbols in every outlet of customer interaction. Look for them in mail solicitations, at bank web sites, on ATM screens and perched at teller counters where you bank. Overt or subliminal, pigs are there.

The hope seems to be to encourage customers to think about the trust, dependability and easy access of their childhood piggy banks; then translate that into customer interest, acceptance and trust in adult savings institutions.

I actually still have confidence in the banking institutions I use most, but my diligence is heightened and I’m watching those institutions closer than I ever have before.

Sure, I feel that they are still working hard for themselves and their investors, but my “piggy” banking institutions have saddles and I’m along for the ride with a firm but easily loosened grip.

Even when the the container you keep your money in is a can, cup, pot or dresser drawer, we still often call it a “piggy bank,” right? Lets all pay more attention where we bank, save and borrow; and lets hope we don’t need to resort to hammers.

Wonderella

2009-03-23T17:33:02Z

Wonderella does Charlotte in no uncertain terms.

I’ll be leaving Porkopolis for a few days this week to work, do research and visit family in NYC.

Luckily for me, there is a superhero there – Wonderella – whose eye is on the pig, so I know she’s watching out for me, too.

Justin Pierce is the creator of the Wonderella comics. He says she’s America’s greatest hero and therefore Earth’s greatest.

I think Wonderella’s true power is that on supreme occasions, she can vanquish her enemies simply by being commonplace. Please check her out and decide for yourself, you’ll be more awesome if you do!

FeedBurner Barbecue

2009-03-10T00:58:28Z

Porkopolis now has RSS feeds handled by Feedburner. The pit boss here manages the on-site aspects with the WordPress plugin FeedSmith (originally authored by the legendary Steve Smith).

The cookery and content are still from that old family recipe I’ve used for over twelve years now, but this table service is new. Please update your RSS readers and tell me what you think. I can already see that we’ll all probably need more napkins…

Belated Blue Beanie Day

2009-03-05T13:47:01Z

I missed the opportunity to officially add my picture to the Second Annual Blue Beanie Day events on November 28, 2008. Blue Beanie Day is the idea of Doug Vos. He created the Designing With Web Standards group on Facebook and invented Blue Beanie Day in 2007. By wearing a blue beanie on that day you are showing your support for web standards and accessibility and acknowledging the work and influence of Jeffrey Zeldman towards this end.

I am a definite believer in the web standards doctrine, but last November I was hesitant to claim an association with a group I respected given the disheveled state of Porkopolis.org then. The new Porkopolis.org site design, v5.0, had been on line about two months by November of 2008, but it still had a few obvious coding difficulties that I was struggling with, and the planned blog section was only impressive on the pages of my Moleskin.

But mostly these procrastinations took a back seat to another difficulty I felt – a perceived lack of cyber social connectedness. This became apparent when I investigated the links to the 2008 Blue Beanie Day invitation on Zeldman’s blog. I needed to be a member of Facebook and Flickr to really join in, and I was neither. While a PAM score for any number of pigs and me is quite high, I have yet to develop much cyber-interconnectedness with any group or individuals outside my family and close friends of long, post-internet association.

Yesterday was National Pig Day. Porkopolis.org’s coding difficulties have been [fingers crossed] corrected. The Porkopolis blog is now free foraging. And new Facebook and Flickr accounts have been opened and associated with Porkopolis.org. So I have placed my Blue Beanie Day image here, and await Blue Beanie Day #3 in November 2009.

Best of all, my family and my friends of long standing continue to keep me around. They do this even when any number of my actions like obsessive Black Pig Dyke hunting and utterances akin to “ham is not a toy” repeatedly give them cause to think that it is time I be placed under the psychoanalytic pig wing of the nearest mental institution.