A Forever Family - Our Joyful Journey

Year End 2013 ... Where are We Now?

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 31 Dec 2013 18:19:00 +0000

Time to relax and exhale after a very busy Christmas with 2 precious children! As I sit with my coffee (ahhh, caffeine!) and start writing, I take a moment to reflect back on the year ... 2013 has truly been the busiest year (aka the most stressful year) I can remember (Yes, even more stressful than living in Pakistan)! I mentally list all that has been accomplished … and, I’m amazed at how it has all gotten DONE! I chuckle to myself because after each year, I think that the “next” year will be less hectic, but with 2 children (1 now a “tween” & 1 now a “preschooler”) the “busy” just moves J! ... I just take a deep breath, exhale and consider it ALL Joy! J

So, what has gotten done? Very exciting news! ... But we will get to that later ... Right now, the “precious-ness” of my children!

Nicholas Ivan – turned 11 years old in December, entrenched now as a “tween”! and in the 5^th grade. He is just such a conversationalist and negotiator these days, knowing “something” about “everything”. I chuckle as I watch him ... “working out a deal” with Mama. He is still very active in sports; Baseball, Soccer, Basketball, Football. Baseball (Mar, Apr, May) and Football (Aug, Sep, Oct) rank up there as the favs these days. Using his soccer skills, he was field goal kicker for his football team ... and loved it! He still absolutely loves baseball, especially pitcher (his fav). He is talking about swimming as his next sport (can’t let his little sister swim past him!) or maybe karate or even cricket (from the Meghji family in Pakistan)! Who knows what is next? He is just an all-around sports nut!

Mama however, keeps him grounded in other things too ... he also has a gift of music and art, and excels in so many other areas. He is in his 4^th year of piano and I just love to hear him play. His formal musical recital was in December and he played“Minuet in G” by Bach ... absolutely beautiful! He has also played in Chapel for school ... with his “buddies” tackling him afterwards (I think in “tween” language that means they were proud of him? J) He truly loves to just pluck out a tune, playing by ear ... such a wonderful gift. And, he also loves to draw ... many versions of cars, trucks, planes are displayed on the refrigerator! He has made “artist of the week” at school and I love to see his artwork come home. I’m building his “collection” to be framed and hung (a bigger house is needed!) Nick also participates in Webelos (Cub Scouts) and raced his pinewood derby car to several wins in January. Camping (Sept-Oct) has become a scouting activity, with Mama as his camping buddy in October. I was in Pakistan when he had his “Mommy and Me” campout (2011 Uppa D, cousin Dalend Baney, was Mommy’s substitute) so we made up for it this year. The weather was perfect, the scenic woods were picturesque, the stars were magnificent, the tent was comfortable with a warm fire outside ... and it didn’t rain (very important for Mama’s camping enjoyment!) I just have so much fun with my Nicholas ... He is just pure JOY and the Love of my Life! J

Marina Grace - Our "Gracy Girl" is now 4.5 years old, turning 4 in June. She is the “whirlwind” in our family (Mama has to stay about 2 steps ahead of her at all times!) She is so active she becomes a “blur” at times. She moves in a constant “skip” (she loves, loves, loves to skip). Our regular caution to Gracy is “Slow down, you’re moving too fast!” During January-May, Gymnastics, Swimming and Soccer were Gracy activities ... and she loved it all! During soccer games, she would hold hands with another little girl and skip up and down the field ... Too Cute! J During the summer she learned to ride her big-girl bike (with training wheels) and she “decided” she no longer needs to wear a life-jacket swimming (Mama, however, is the final decider!). She has amazed us all with her swimming ability ... at 4 years old, she swims down to the bottom of the pool, turns summer saults and back flips under water (without holding her nose!) and her cannon ball is outstanding (not much splash for such a little girl, but her form is perfect!). She started full-time pre-school in August and loves every minute of it. She can count up to 20, sing her ABC song and write her name ... she is so proud! (Mama too). I again love the toddler run to Mama at pick-up time, the breath-taking hug, all smiles and sticky kisses! She loves to read books and our bedtime routine is very important to her with “read another book, Mama?” She is a petite, not a very big-around little girl, but all arms and legs! She has always had “no fear”, giving it her all, 100% ... trying everything and anything before she even thinks! (Mama’s prayer is “Lord, protect her & slow her down!”). Dancing and singing are also favorites and she started ballet and tap in September. She loves to put on a “show” for us and loves to dance as her big brother plays the piano (truly, it is the most entertaining show in town! J). She is still a very “girly-girl” loving dress-up, make-up (caught applying Mama’s make-up so many times!) and she loves to play with hair (she finally succeeded in cutting her hair, but Mama was able to “trim”). With her big, bright, beautiful brown eyes that just twinkle when she smiles and laughs ... long beautiful brown hair that just shines ... Gracy is just beautiful, adorable and precious! J

On her medical front, we do have a diagnosis for Gracy’s neurological condition, Ventriculomegaly. No one knows when or how, but a blockage was formed in the Cerebral Spinal System inside Gracy’s brain and created a pooling of the cerebral spinal fluid, expanding the CSF ventricles to accommodate the extra fluid. Although enlarged brain ventricles is a major symptom of Hydrocephalus (Pakistan diagnosis), Gracy does not exhibit any other symptoms of Hydrocephalus ... so a reduced diagnosis. She is expected to eventually grow into her 90+% sized head! J Gracy’s severe tongue tie is actually the more significant medical issue for her at this time. Her tongue was released (July 2011 in Pakistan) and her language acquisition/English comprehension is now 100% for a 4 year old, but she struggles with speech articulation (Mama translates!). So, Gracy is in speech therapy, working on speech articulation. She loves speech therapy (fun, fun, fun!) She has exceeded and gained in all areas. When I took custody of Gracy in January 2011, her height was < 2% on the growth chart and her weight was not even on the growth chart. After 17 months in Pakistan, major supplements, massive doses of vitamins and iron, she arrived in the US, 2012 at a whopping 25% for height and 15% for weight. Now ... 1.5 years later, she has gained 6 pounds and grown 6 inches, she is now 50% height and weight, YEAH! She is and always has been just perfect! My baby girl is growing up so very fast ... She is just pure JOY and the Love of my Life! J

Katy Sue – On a very, very sad note ... we lost our doggie in April (April 13, 2001-April 5, 2013). After losing the battle with a tumor, Katy passed away in her sleep, on a warm spring night, she was 12 years old ... It is still very hard to comprehend the loss of Katy. She was my doggie, my 1^st born, my sweet Katy dog. I grieve every day and I miss her so much . . .

Mama/Mommy/Mom – I’ll just copy from last year’s letter ... “The best word to describe my life these days ... Busy with a capital “B”! Busy with the children and Busy managing LIFE!” ... I’m trying to “reinvent” myself these days ... into what I’m not exactly sure ... but I’ll get there! J As I said last year, “Life is about change and I simply embrace it with Joy.”

OK, so now for the exciting news about Gracy’s legal case! On September 27, 2013 a US adoption decree was granted and signed ... Marina Grace Baney became officially and legally my daughter and I became officially and legally her mother! J Such a surreal and amazing moment in time, after 4.5 years of obstacles! Yes, it has been an overwhelming, extremely busy and exhausting year with 3 different legal processes for Gracy’s case. First, in February, beginning a new US domestic Home Study, finally completed in June (US adoption requirement). Second, the US Petition for Adoption, completed in August, many document revisions later, we were surprised by the Oklahoma family courts with an expedited court hearing date in September! Third, Gracy’s US immigration dossier for US permanent residency and US citizenship (US adoption decree & certificate of foreign birth a requirement). This “last” completed dossier was sent to our immigration attorney early December. We are hoping to file with USCIS for residency and citizenship right after the 1^st of 2014! Then, a 3-6 month wait for the ruling. Gracy’s Humanitarian Parole expires late May, 2014 so timing will be very close. Many have asked ... (1) “Is this it?” and (2) “Can she still be deported?” Those answers are (1) Yes, this is it! The final step is her permanent residency and US citizenship. We are hoping for a favorable ruling, but also know it may take several attempts, due to the case’s history. (2) Yes, she can still be deported under certain circumstances, but probably unlikely that will happen (but, nothing surprises me anymore!). And, we will take it as it comes, as a FAMILY! I ask you to please keep us in your prayers as we cross the finish line with Gracy’s case. Please pray for softened hearts ... for a little girl’s best interests.

So, that has been Mama’s year, paperwork, documents and dossers ... #1, #2 and #3! And, of course, the joy of parenting Nicky and Gracy! ... Believe me, there were many, many plates spinning in the air, each one a very “full” plate! The family blog (nrbfamily.blogspot.com) is so out-of-date!, but if you would like to read our adoption stories, the blog still has the many details of 2007-2012. And, I have pictures and a few updates from 2012 to current date on Facebook (ID nbaney). As for, “The Book” ... well, we will see about that ... maybe 2014 will give me time to turn my attention to consider another major project? J

Other events of the year – In February, G’ma came to visit and broke her leg! G’ma stayed in Tulsa for surgery and rehab for 3+ months. An unfortunate accident, but we thoroughly enjoyed G’ma every day during her extended stay, until late May when she was finally able to travel home to Nebraska. April was Gracy’s Pakistani “Gotcha Day”. In June, Gracy’s 4^th b-day with a long weekend and baseball tournament in Branson, MO /Silver Dollar City and FUN! In July, a 10-day vacation in Austin, TX with the Shorman’s (Mama’s sister) and so many fun activities (complete with iFLY, indoor sky diving for Nick!). August, start of 5^th grade for Nicky and pre-school for Gracy. September, is now “Gotcha Day” for BOTH children, we celebrated with another fun trip to Branson/Silver Dollar City in MO! “Gotcha Day” wouldn’t be complete without our traditional “balloon release” in honor of global orphans ... we somehow worked it all in! October, a much-needed, relaxing 2 week vacation for Mama in Dubai, UAE with Karim Meghji (owner of the amazing Pakistani guest house we stayed 2011-2012). He is wonderful “Papa” and we video chat every day! November, a wonderful Thanksgiving trip to G’ma/G’pa’s farm (complete with horseback riding!). December, Nick’s b-day (wild sleepover!) and finally ending the year with an amazing Christmas and an ice storm that gave everything a sparkle and a magical touch!

Whew, 2013 is now over! As I look around me, I STILL see toys on the floor, dishes in the sink, laundry piled high . . . but, LIFE has finally normalized ... I think? We are healthy and happy, safe and warm , together as a family looking forward to a new year, 2014! And, above all else, we treasure ALL our wonderful Blessings ... health, accomplishment, growth, purpose, fellowship, faith, childhood, family, laughter and love. And, yes, moments of sadness, challenges, disappointment and pain, but opportunities for blessings as well.

Our Heavenly Father gives us a strong, steady spirit to move forward through it all.

“Count it ALL Joy . . . “ (James 1)

With love to all our family & friends,

Nancy, Nicky & Gracy Baney (& Uppa D)

Happy Holidays! ...

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Sun, 15 Dec 2013 18:22:00 +0000

2012 Year End

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 02 Jan 2013 00:36:00 +0000

Hello, Dear Family & Friends . . .

As I sit and relax with my tea, I take a moment to reflect back on the year . . . 2012 has certainly been divided between major highs and major lows. And, Yes, even though it has been a very difficult year . . . it has been like “No Other” Year!

At the top of the year's memory list was our miracle Homecoming for Gracy the end of May from Pakistan! Stepping off the final flight onto Oklahoma soil was such an emotional moment, Mama was so very thankful and Gracy was, well as a very tired toddler should be . . . peacefully asleep. And, as we walked through security to the waiting crowd of family and friends . . . Mama was speechless as happy tears fell. What a wonderful sight! After 1.5 years of separation, it felt so good to finally hold BOTH my children in my arms . . . at LAST!

Marina Grace - Our "Gracy Girl" is now 3.5 years old! She turned 3 in June and her birthday was celebrated at Silver Dollar City in Branson, Missouri. In July, a big “Birthday/Homecoming” celebration was held to welcome Gracy home to the US. Most of the summer was spent compiling new medical evaluations to determine her medical needs. Medically she is doing very well and all medical evals have resulted with a “Hmmm, yes, there is something there . . . but she’s developing like there is nothing there . . . let’s move forward with a “watch & wait” medical plan . . . no surgeries needed, at this point!” Gracy’s speech pathologist is amazed at how she accommodates for her tongue tie. Over a short few months, she has grown so much and her English has really blossomed (Mama just has to translate sometimes). She continues to meet or exceed all major, age-appropriate milestones! Outside of several fevers/colds (new American germs), her adjustment to the US has been without any complications. She is just perfect! J

Gracy is “action waiting to happen” from the moment she wakes up . . . until her little head hits the pillow at night. She is just ADORABLE . . . and a HANDFULL! She has no fear, which resulted in a broken arm in July! You can’t turn your back for a second when she is around water, animals or in a store (recent missing child “Amber Alert” in Kohls). Yet . . . she is such a “girly girl”. Her FAVORITE thing right now is Mama’s “lip-lip” (yes, my lipstick & each lipstick has a G mark!) and “dress-up” (including hat, purse & shoes!) One night recently, I woke up in the middle of the night and found Gracy “dressing-up” with all the clothes from her closet on the floor! I always call her my Sweet Pea, but now I also lovingly call her my “Sweet Mess”! J She LOVES to sing/dance . . . I just smile as she serenades me from her car seat during our daily errands, always reminding me of my adorable blessing. And, a night-night doesn’t go by without singing her favorite song . . . “You Are My Sunshine.” She dances to any kind of music and I love to watch her as she twirls and pirouettes and “shakes it all about”. She is so much fun!

Nicholas Ivan – Now in double digits . . . Nicky was a big 10 years old in December! He is definitely Mama’s “big boy” now. While I was in Pakistan, he grew and changed so much. Once I returned . . . Oh, My . . . Where did my little boy go? . . . a very bittersweet adjustment for Mama. Over the last 6 months, we have slowly worked our way back to each other.

Nick (no longer, really wanting to be called Nick-y, although Mama slips many times J) is in the 4^th grade and doing just great in school. His love of sports continues, and our “All Star” added a new sport, Football, to his increasing busy schedule. Soccer, Baseball, Basketball, Football, he doesn’t miss a season without playing some kind of sport and here at year-end he is playing 2 sports, Basketball/Soccer (2 sports in a season is something Mama said she would never do . . . but soccer is a weekend, indoor conditioning game with thankfully NO practices). It seems Baseball is still the fav, but any sport will do (even a cricket bat/ball from Pakistan!) Nick is a very artistic/creative boy as well. He loves his music and is playing the piano for the 3^rd year. His December recital was beautiful and his musical accomplishments were recognized with 2, 2^nd place awards. He is also playing the recorder in school music and he marches around the house to the tune of “Hot Cross Buns”! He really enjoys music of any kind, any instrument and he loves to “pluck” out a tune by ear. Christmas brought him musical electronics, key board and drum set . . . now, he is our “Rock Star”! His creative side also includes a love of art and his art teacher recently told me, “Nick just intuitively gets it”. Since Mama can’t draw a straight line, I wasn’t exactly sure what that meant, until a recent project, “The Nativity, This Great Day” . . . amazing and beautiful!

The very 1^st moment I saw my children, my heart instantly loved them as my “son & daughter”, but becoming “brother & sister” has had its unique challenges. We work at it every day, slowly . . . and, after 6 months, I can see progress and I’m proud of how far we have come as a family . . . some days it is 2 steps forward and 1 step backward . . . but still moving forward! Gracy adores her big brother and Nick is starting to think that having a little sister isn’t so bad . . . after all! We were shopping one evening recently and Nick protectively held Gracy’s hand as they crossed the busy traffic. I watched from behind and smiled. As joy filled my heart, I thought, “Could this be the beginning of love? Or, maybe perhaps, just deep like!” J I’m so very proud of my children . . . They are both pure JOY and the LOVES of my Life!

Katy Sue – Our sweet Katy dog is now 11.5+ years old (12 next April)! She is really starting to slow down, but given enough attempts, she can still jump up into the back of the SUV (however, she usually plants her front paws on the bumper & then looks at Mama to help her the rest of the way!) She LOVES when N/G play with her (as long as she can recline). The favorite is to play “doctor” (since Gracy’s broken arm, both kids love to use the splint wraps on Katy). Katy walks around with her legs wrapped daily and never seems to mind. She is the perfect doggie for Gracy . . . when Katy has had enough of Gracy, Katy just simply gets up and finds a quiet place to hide from Gracy! She’ll still do anything for an ear rub. And, yes . . . Katy and Mama STILL fight over Mama’s chair!

Mama/Mommy/Mom – I will answer to “any of the above”! J The best word to describe my life these days . . . Busy with a capital “B”! Busy with the children and Busy managing LIFE! Yes, there are a few “fair, to partly cloudy” days and “how did I get here?” days, but overall, I’m doing well. I do have to admit, the adjustments to life these days have been challenging and I’m in such a very different place today than a couple of years ago or even just 1 year ago! But life is about change and I simply embrace it with Joy.

I’m still very busy with legal issues for Gracy’s adoption case. Gracy is here in the US on a Humanitarian Parole, a temporary approval to reside in the US for 2 years. During that time, many steps of US approval are required for Gracy to live in the US permanently as my daughter (I currently have permanent legal guardianship). As of now, we are only about 50% complete and I’m currently working on the US adoption (hopefully an adoption hearing in March). Nothing in Gracy’s case has been easy and the US adoption is no exception . . . but I’m an “old hand” at working through the complex/challenging details and consider it “all Joy” (nothing surprises me anymore!). Once we have a legal parent/child relationship through a US adoption decree, Gracy can move forward through the permanent US immigration process and then US citizenship. I ask you to please keep us in your prayers as we continue forward with Gracy’s case. Please pray for softened hearts . . . for a little girl’s best interests.

I haven’t been able to carve out much time to write in the last year (except for legal documents! J) . . . and the out-of-date blog and facebook show it! J But, I do plan on updating as soon as I can. So if you would like to follow along . . . nrbfamily.blogspot.com (The blog is public, once again). My Facebook, account ID – nbaney.

Other events of the year – In January, after a 5 week visit home to the US (seems like a lifetime ago), Mama’s return trip to Pakistan to again take up the USCIS fight for Gracy to live in the US. In February, a trip to Murree, Pakistan (Himalayan mountains) for Gracy’s 1^st snow. In April, Gracy’s Humanitarian Parole approval. In May, Shorman family visit to Islamabad, Pakistan - Aunt MJ/”ChaChi” and Joel (sister Mary Jane Shorman & nephew Joel Shorman). In July, a family vacation to Austin, Texas over July 4^th. In September, our 8^th Familiversary (changed from “Gotcha Day” since September is now the significant month both the children and I became “family”; N 2004 & MG 2009). And, as always, it was a beautiful autumn day at the park with balloons going up, up, up - our traditional balloon release in honor of orphans. In November, Thanksgiving on the Baney farm in Nebraska with G’ma/G’pa. The highlight of the trip was introducing Gracy to family and riding horses, complete with cowboy hats! Over the year, so many “firsts” for Gracy and it has been so fun watching her embrace her new US life.

When I was working as a project manager, after project completion the project team would document “Lessons Learned” to help gain wisdom for future projects. Home now for 6 months I’ve been able to reflect . . . What are my “Lessons Learned” over the last year? I can truly say that so many areas of my life have been touched . . . I’m richer, I’m poorer. I’ve won, I’ve lost. I’m a stronger person and yet, weaker as well. I’ve learned that “No” doesn’t have to mean “The End”. I’ve learned there are deeper reserves to Perseverance, Patience, Peace. I’ve learned that “calm” can come with just 1 word, my word is . . . “Grace”. I’ve learned there are no perfect people, only a perfect God that uses people perfectly for His perfect plan.

And, as we come to the end of 2012 . . . I’m so very, very thankful for those that stand alongside my beautiful and amazing family. Family - The “constant” Uppa D (cousin Dalend Baney), who is co-parent; my family, whose encouragement and support has resulted in renewed relationships. New Friends - My life has been enriched beyond words with the people I have met and become close to over the last year, here in the US, in Pakistan and all around the world. Old friends - It has been wonderful to reconnect with everyone. If I haven’t said hello to you, please send me an email, novokbb2@yahoo.com.

As I look around me, I see toys on the floor, dishes in the sink, laundry piled high . . . but, my son is happily reading in his room and my little daughter is napping with “no cares in the world”. We are safe and warm . . . together as a family. And, above all else, we treasure ALL our wonderful Blessings . . . health, accomplishment, growth, purpose, fellowship, faith, childhood, family, laughter and love. And, yes, moments of sadness, challenges, disappointment and pain, but opportunities for blessings as well.

Our Heavenly Father gives us a strong, steady spirit to move forward through it all.

“Count it ALL Joy . . . “ (James 1).

With love to all our family & friends,

Nancy, Nicky & Gracy Baney (& Uppa D)

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 26 Dec 2012 00:40:00 +0000

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

Hello - - from Islamabad, Pakistan - COMING HOME!

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Sat, 19 May 2012 00:13:00 +0000

COMING HOME from Pakistan! :) . . . a total of 495 days, 70+ weeks, 16+ months!

Yes, we are coming home . . . Marina Grace has been granted a 2 year Humanitarian Parole by USCIS! Simply put . . . our MIRACLE!

Due to all the complex legal issues, it has been a while since our last update . . . so, below is an update on the "rest" of our story here in Pakistan . . .

September - We filed an official I-290B Appeal for the I-600 Orphan Status Denial. An applicant has only 30 days from the date of denial to file the appeal, but can ask for an additional 30 days to follow up with an additional legal brief & evidence dossier, which we have done. I have also retained new legal counsel, Poarch Law, an immigration law firm in the Washington, D.C. area. Christine Poarch has taken on our case & we are hopeful that the new legal brief & evidence dossier can be pulled together quickly, since we have only 30 days to complete it (mid Oct). We have also contacted the adoption advocacy organization EACH (Equity for Adopted Children) to help with our plight with USCIS. We are hopeful that McLane Layton (founder of EACH) will be able to advocate Gracy's case personally with USCIS.

October - After a frantic month of working with new immigration/intercountry adoption attorneys, the I-290B Appeal Legal Brief & New Evidence Dossier is complete! It was a whirlwind month of late nights in Paksitan, connecting with attorneys via skype, pulling together all the details necessary for a new evidence dossier. This new Legal Brief/Evidence Dossier is MASSIVE (~ 150 pages long)! No, it is not "light reading!" lol! Christine/McLane have done a very thorough job in pulling the details together. All we can do now is WAIT! It will need to go through a 1st review with the local USCIS office of jurisdiction (New Delhi, India), we are hoping the appeal review will be completed by Christmas/year-end. It would be wonderful if we could be HOME for Christmas, but I'm not holding my breath . . . !

In the meantime, we have also made the decision to go ahead & move forward with an application for Humanitarian Parole for medical care. Hopefully this can be filed within 4-6 weeks. This is very much a "long shot" - the normal process for an HP is to exhaust ALL other options 1st .. . . before filing an application for HP. Since we technically have a "pending" immigrant visa thru our appeal, this is a long shot & I'm told will probably be considered by USCIS to have the motive of "circumventing US law" or entering the US & then MG simply staying! However, if we wait & file the HP after the appeal's decision, it could be 2 years from now . . . Gracy simply doesn't have that kind of time, considering her health issues. So, we are going to go ahead & file the HP application now & then . . . pray, pray, pray that God's hand will lead the way!

It is also time for "another" visa extension for Mama (#6) - application was made for a 6 month visa. it will be 4 weeks before we know if it will be granted. I'm hoping for at least 3 months, which would take me to the end of the year . . . could we be home by then????

November - Still working on the HP application dossier. Medical expert opinions are slow to come in & the holidays are fast approaching. No chance for a year-end return home :(. We are hoping for a mid Dec HP file date - Pray we can get everything pulled together before the Christmas/New Year holidays!

Gracy & Mama did have a very nice Thanksgiving in Islamabad. We had Thanksgiving dinner at the Serena Hotel (only place we could find that served turkey!) . . . Gracy's 1st taste of turkey! She loved it!

Mama is getting very "blue" thinking of the up-coming holidays without my Nicky-boy! I'll miss his 9th birthday along with Christmas with my little guy . . . the tears fall easily when I think about it. :(

December - Surprise, surprise . . . Papa Karim & Shelina made a MIRACLE happen . . . with some strategically placed influence, the Pakistani Ministry of Interior granted me a visa extension with a "1x re-entry" to Pakistan from the US. What this means . . . I can leave & re-enter Pakistan under my current visa . . . aka . . . I can come home for Nicky's birthday & Christmas & New Year's!!! YEAH! I'm thrilled . . . but on the other hand very sad, I will have to leave Gracy here in Pakistan. She will be under the care of a live-in nanny that Papa Karim & I have searched high-n-low for. It has been a very quick process to find someone, but I also know that Papa Karim will have a watchful eye on our Gracy Girl!!! We will skype everyday . . . from the flip side (can my life get any more complicated???)

I didn't tell Nicky or my family I was coming home for Christmas . . . didn't want to get hopes up should it not work out, but it did! I surprised my sister in Austin. Yep, just showed up at her door step on 12/7/11! She was speechless & I almost had to pick her up off the floor! It was GREAT!!! I spent a day with sis & then flew into Tulsa to surprise Nicky!!! When Dalend opened the door . . . just a speechless stare for several seconds, then Nicky popped his head around & I heard "Mama, you're home!" Yes, tears! I just want to say "Thank You" to Laura (Austin) & Jan (Tulsa) for meeting me at the airport & more importantly, keeping my special Christmas "secret"!

The 5 weeks home were a whirlwind . . . so much to do, so little time! Loving on my Nicky, Piano recital, Christmas programs, birthday, Christmas, basketball, baseball, football, friends to "catch up" with, places to go & people to see (3 different legislative offices to share Gracy's story & try to gain momentum fpr the HP).

We were able to complete the HP dossier & submit the application by mid Dec, right before Christmas . . . Now, the wait . . . !

The days fly by & before I know it, it's time to travel back to Pakistan on my miraculous visa re-entry!

January 2012 - Back in Pakistan & loving on my Gracy Girl! She is now sporting a very interesting "bangs" haircut! Somehow that happened while Mama was gone . . . hair grows! :) Skype worked very well, everyday & Gracy was running to Mama with open arms! I'm missing my boy, though . . . but maybe the HP has a chance, maybe soon we will be making plans to fly home to the US, maybe soon . . . ?

mid Jan - our HP application has been rejected & kicked back due to an "administrative" error. The I-131 form has been revised & corrected, resubmitted late Jan.

It is cooolllddd in Islamabad. The only heat we have is from a small floor heater & it just isn't very safe around a 2 year old . . . so I decided to not use it. Mama has brought back a whopper of a cold from the US. It has spread like wild fire through the g.house. Gracy, Papa & staff . . . Uggghhh! we are all cranky!

We are living through the "wait" on both the Appeal & HP. After 90 days from our Appeal legal brief + evidence filing (it has actually been 120 days since the I-290B appeal filing, but what's another month after this long?), we have not heard a "peep" from New Delhi on the Appeal review. We are beginning to seriously question the "why" of New Delhi USCIS . . . yes serious issues with that USCIS office! Hopefully . . . soon!

February - HP application has been rejected AGAIN & we now have to submit new financials (I-134). Please pray - this could be problematic since I am currently unemployed. Through the I-131 supplemental financial application that needs to accompany the I-131 HP application, I have to show adequate financial sponsorship . . . I know there is a way through this, God does have a plan! As of mid Feb, we finally do have an HP application that "sticks" & moves forward to adjudication . . . deep breath & prayers!

Valentine's day is spent with balloons & sweet Gracy loving on her new "pink be-be" (pink teddy bear Mama, Uppa D & Nicky gave her). She loved the bear, valentine cake & candies Papa gave her/us. The adults had a wonderful time & "evening out" at a new restaurant, Des-Per-Des (Live band sang the "Titanic" theme song for me, only song they knew in English, lol!). I watched Nicky & Uppa D open their "Valentines" from Mama via skype.

It is COLD!, but we are making the best of it . . . without heat! Warm blankets & layers! We took a day trip to Murree (Himalayan mountains), a quaint mountain village so Gracy could see the SNOW (her 1st snow!). She loved it, but only wanted to "eat" it! We had a great time, except . . . found out the hard way . . . Gracy gets motion/car sick! A side-of-the-highway "clean up" of little Gracy was required not only once, but twice!

Nicky/Uppa D are in the throws of school, cub scouts & ALL the sports - basketball, pre-season baseball & soccer will start soon! I watch Nicky's games via skype, usually very early in the morning Pakistan time (evening US time).

The "girls" are in Pakistan, the "boys" are in the US - I cannot thank Uppa D enough for ALL that he is doing to keep us "normalized". Without his committed efforts, I simply could not stay here with Gracy. Without Mama . . . Gracy would have to be placed back in orphanage/institutional care until we "can find a way". Leaving her with orphanage caregivers just isn't the "right, best" option. Thank you, Uppa D!

Time for a new PakIstani visa extension for Mama (# 7). When Shelina/Mama make application in person with MOI, I'm told this is my last visa extension . . . based on a new Pakistani visa policy . . . I'm a bit nervous & begin to make tentative plans for a new country "move" with Gracy. I can take Gracy to any other country . . . just not the US! Just which one should we move to . . . is the question?

March - Finally, S.Inhofe's office makes the "call" to New Delhi about our Appeal, it has now been 6 months . . . plenty of time for review. Interestingly enough, immediately after the senator's office makes this call, we receive a denial for the appeal from the New Delhi office. Yes, the very next day . . . question - did ND even review at all? Or, just "stamp" the easy "denial" to satisfy legislative inquiry? We will never know! Anyway, the Appeal has now moved on to the 5th & final review, the AAO (Administrative Appeal's Office) in W,D.C. This is the dreaded 12+ month wait we were hoping we could avoid, but alas . . . I am very blue. My spirit is waning . . . my strength ebbing . . . I just don't understand the "why"?, but I just have to trust. According to 6 competent, immigration attorneys, MG's case facts absolutely comply with immigration law & intercountry orphan status guidelines; she is definitely an "orphan" & should be granted USCIS "orphan status" classification. BUT, our USCIS officials can't seem to put the "facts" together in the accurate, logical timeline sequence & therefore, she has been denied orphan status classification for an immigrant visa for the 4th time! I know God is bigger than ALL of this!

However, a "Yeah!" on the HP side. We have notice on the HP! I can't believe the quick response time on this! USCIS has responded with a request of 8 additional supplemental items/documents. Some of these are "easy" & some are more "difficult". We are "digging in" & diligently trying to complete these as quickly as we can. We do see this as a "good sign", USCIS is reviewing our application &, Oh, do I dare dream & say it out loud? . . . could USCIS be "considering" our HP case? We can't get this supplemental "to do" list completed fast enough, but it has to be thorough . . . the HP decision relies on these supplemental documents . . . special needs Home Study Addendum, Medical Treatment Plan, Immigration Plan & more, etc., etc . . . The next 3-4 weeks are a whirlwind getting everything pulled together. Mama taking additional online classes for an updated Home Study, connecting with Tulsa pediatricians for treatment plans, gathering more documents . . . But, inside I'm starting to believe the HP just might be the possible route home . . . :)

April - 4/12/12 the HP supplemental dossier is rec'd by USCIS! I found out the HP review needs to go through 2 different units, the adoption unit & then humanitarian unit. If the adoption unit gives a favorable recommendation, the HP will move on to the humanitarian unit. Maybe a decision within a 2-4 week time frame (could it really be that quick? I'm not getting my hopes up! lol!). Hoping for the best . . . Preparing for the worst! In the meantime, we need to understand if there is anything else we can do during the 12-24 month "wait" for the AAO appeal decision. So, I "dig in", once again, scouring the internet, searching for any kind of case similar to ours that has had a favorable outcome. And, I have found a precedent setting case in India where a US petition for adoption was granted via a teleconferenced US court hearing. This could be our answer . . . we could possibly come through an I-130 "immediate relative" immigrant visa provision instead of the I-600/IR-4 adoption immigrant visa provision. However, since Pakistan does not have a provision for "adoption", we cannot get an in-country, Pakistani adoption decree, but maybe we can get a US adoption decree through an adoption hearing via teleconference? With an adoption decree, I can prove parent/child relationship . . . the I-130 immediate relative immigration provision just might be a possibility. Mama is making contact with the adoptive family in hopes the adoption attorney for the India case will visit & give advice for MG's case. Fingers crossed that this might become a viable option!

We celebrated Marina Grace's "Gotcha Day" on 4/15/12. I actually took physical custody of MG back in January 2011, so the 1 year anniversary was during the time when everyone had such terrible colds! But, we do have several "dates" to choose from for this special day . . . so I have chosen 4/15, the date we received the Certificate of Guardianship & the Pakistani side was finally completed. We had a small gathering here at the guest house & Gracy was all "pretty in pink"! A lovely pink dress that had lots of lace & tulle. She twirled & twirled in her pretty party ddress, until she couldn't twirl anymore!!! We skyped Uppa D/Nicky in so they could enjoy the festivities, too! It was a great day! I simply cannot believe it has been a year . . . but then I look at Gracy & see how much she has grown . . . yes, it has been an amazing year with my beautiful daughter!!!

On 4/19/12 we rec'd an amazing phone call - The USCIS Adoption Unit has recommended a favorable decision & approval for the HP!!! It will now move on to the USCIS Humanitarian Unit . . . I'm on pins-n-needles thinking that THIS may be IT! Maybe, just maybe, the momentum has turned in our favor . . . maybe all the advocacy phone calls from EACH, Both Ends Burning & legislative offices has finally made a "dent" . . . maybe USCIS is finally "hearing" our plea for Gracy's case! It came so very fast & I'm told the humanitarian unit will make a decision within the next 5-10 days . . . so hopefully we will know in a week!

4/26/12 - The USCIS Humanitarian Unit has also approved the HP . . . I am stunned, please pick me up off the floor, yet so very, very thankful!!! We are FINALLY going HOME!!!!

May - What an incredible month! My sister, Mary Jane & nephew, Joel, had planned a visit in May to Pakistan . . . now they will be here for the final days of our stay, as well. My sister MJ was able to go with me to the USE on 5/7/12 to pick up the HP travel document. It was an experience . . . Gracy is the 1st Humanitarian Parole from Pakistan to the US . . . the USE/Islmbd didn't quite know what to do or how to process an HP. After several phone calls & a 4 hour wait at the USE, we finally walked out of the USE for the last time with a travel document for Gracy to enter the US. The USE security guards were, once again, so kind & sweet . . . they all rejoiced with us, as we walked through for the last time! YEAH!!!! :)

I was able to relive the adoption experience with MJ as I "walked" thru it all again with her . . . I took her to the lower courts & then high court, she met my Pakistani barristers, visited Edhi Home & Dr. Rubina. I also took her to the Ministry of Interior where I pleaded 8 times for a Pakistani visa extension! It was wonderful to share these experiences with her . . . my journey became very "real" to her & I saw the understanding in her eyes with each "stop" along the journey's path. I feel so privileged to be able to share all of this with her!

Joel arrived a week after MJ & we are all now experiencing the sights & sounds of Pakistan. A wonderful day trip to the mountains of Murree, Pakistan (Himalayan mountains). Joel loved seeing the beauty of northern Pakistan. He was shocked (as are most people) at the natural beauty that Pakistan has. No, it is not just "desert"! LOL!

I still have to "pack up" our life here in Pakistan, a somewhat bittersweet task! As I go through our small, little #25 guest house room, I separate "pack", "ship" & "donate" items. Each has such a special memory & I tuck the memories away. I smile, cry & laugh . . . as I relive & remember our "life" here in Pakistan. Wonderful memories to share with Gracy one day! Despite everything . . . I have come to love this country . . . learned to love my daughter's birth place & I can truly say . . . I now understand the culture & country of Pakistan (NO, it is not the awful country everyone thinks it is!). We are leaving Pakistan, but this is not "good by". I have spent "pockets of time" saying farewell to all my dear Pakistani friends.

The hardest farewell of all - leaving New Cape Grace Guest House & the Meghji family - Papa Karim, Sameer & Shelina - Tears fall easily when I think of how much we will miss them. How much a part of our extended family they have become, more than just friends! I watch Gracy with everyone (Papa, Sameer/Shelina & staff), as they teach her "Gracy going to 'merica" & I again tuck special memories in my heart to share with her one day . . . about a special guest house & family, where cultural barriers simply don't exist & global borders are transparent. They lovingly allowed us in their hearts & loved a baby girl . . . just because! The guest house was our "calm, safe harbor" in the midst of the "storm". There are no words to describe my bittersweet feelings about leaving this wonderful, peaceful place that "saved" us!

I will miss all my special friends that I have made here . . . I have very mixed emotions when I think of leaving Pakistan. But . . . we are just leaving, we are not saying "good bye". The friendships & relationships will last a life time. And, in our case . . . the "end does justify the means". Our time spent in Pakistan was well worth our efforts . . . the efforts of doing good are always rewarded!

And, then I look at my sweet Nicholas . . . now 9.5 years old. I have "missed" being with him for 16+ months, almost 1.5 years! I know I'll never be able to get that time back, my heart aches & I grieve over the loss of those days with him, but I do know Marina Grace has needed me here, in Pakistan.

And, yes, I "think" about how my own US gov't has handled or "mishandled" this case in comparison to how Pakistan has handled this case . . . I was placed in such a difficult position . . . no parent should have to "choose" between their children due to "bureaucratic", mismanagement!!! I am just so jaded by our supposed superior US systems that are just so very, very "broken"! But . . . that is a discussion for another day . . . it is now time for rejoicing . . . !

I anxiously look forward to having BOTH my children in my arms . . . at last!!!

So, we are finally Coming Home! :) We leave Pakistan early morning, 5/20/12 & will fly back with my sister (MJ) & nephew (Joel) - Amazing how that "worked" out!

Itinerary

1st leg (5/20) - 3.5 hour flight from Islamabad to Dubai

2nd leg (5/20) - 16.5 hour flight from Dubai to Houston, TX

3rd leg (5/20) - 3 hour care drive from Houston to Austin, TX (spend the night)

4th leg (5/21) - 1 hour flight from Austin to Dallas

5th leg (5/21) - 1 hour flight from Dallas to Tulsa Arrival - Southwest Airlines - Mon, May 21, 2012 05:20 PM

I have had many ask me about "meeting/greeting" us at the airport . . . I say, "Alert the Media! Let's CELEBRATE!"! Everyone who would like to meet & greet us at the airport, "Ajah" ("come on" in Urdu)!!! :)

So . . . We will see you all very SOON!!!

As I take a final blog moment to reflect . . . The question is "Would I do it again?" - there is NO hesitation, absolutely, without a single doubt . . . for these 2 children . . . I would do it all again! I stand in awe of the miraculous stories of my precious children! As I have always said, I am simply their "stepping stone" . . . . from their institutionalized life "here", to their future potential "there" with love & Mama . . . the future is unknown, but we look forward to a precious, wonderful life of Love! Both Nicky & Gracy are pure JOY . . . And, the loves of my life! :)

With a humbled, sincere heart . . . Thank You - for all your encouragement & support . . .

Mama, Nicky & Gracy (& Uppa D)

(aka Nancy Baney family)

So, Here We Are . . . !

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 21:30:00 +0000

The blog has been silent for such a long time . . . however, my love for international adoption is still very much alive! I am now at a point where my spirit has encouraged me to again share my joyful journey with my cyber friends.

Much has happened over the last 20 + months (yes, it has been that long since I really posted!) So much in fact that I don’t really know where to begin, so forgive me if it just starts to pour out like a flood!

My son, Nicholas, as always, is my shining light . . . AND, over the last 2 years, the work to bring my precious daughter, our Sweet Pea . . . Marina Grace, home has never wavered.

So, where are we today???

Nicholas Ivan (Nicky) – is 8.5 years old & in the 3rd grade. He has transferred to a new school this year & these days he is in the major activities of school. He is a busy, busy little boy with his love of all sports, cars, construction & all that is “boy” (yes, dirt & gravel are high on the list!). He also “kinda” has a love of music & when he plays the piano . . . Wow! . . . To hear him play with such joy, just makes my heart sing (he isn’t quite sure yet if he loves it, but mama knows!). He is our resident meteorologist (loves the weather channel. Has his very own weather station, checks it every day) & his hand-eye coordination with a baseball & with his Nintendo DS is amazing (needless to say, he has used both a lot this summer!) His blue eyes just twinkle & he has the sweetest, kindest spirit. He is & always will be . . . pure joy . . . the love of my life!

Marina Grace (Gracy) – Our Sweet Pea! She turned 2 in June 2011. She is absolutely a precious, precious baby girl! Finally chubby in all the right places with beautiful smiles that just light up the day. Her big brown eyes just pull you into her “all-that-is-2” world. She is just so sweet; you want to “eat her up”. She loves to sing & dance! I just love to watch her all day long & never take my eyes off her because . . .

1) she is absolutely precious (have I said that already?!)

2) she is growing FAST!

3) she is non-stop action waiting to happen in the blink of an eye! She is a “happening” little tyke, doesn’t miss a beat & you have to be ready to “hit the ground running” from morning to night. And . . . I just absolutely LOVE her! She is & always will be . . . pure joy . . . the love of my life!!

Mama – trying my best to parent 2 children . . . in 2 different countries . . . on 2 different continents! I have now been living in Islamabad, Pakistan with Sweet Pea since Jan 2011, going on 10 months. Yes, Gracy’s adoption story is very long, complex & detailed. Over the course of future posts, I will share with you just how it has all come about . . . But, for right now, know that we are all doing our best, given our current situation. We have our daily "global" commute with each other through skype!

Uppa D – As always . . . there is our wonderful Uppa D . . . the constant co-parent to our family (my cousin, Dalend). He has shown his true loving heart over the last few months. First traveling with Mama to Pakistan for a 2 month stay . . . then returning home to live with Nicky in the US as a full-time caregiver. Yes, he is being "Mr. Mommy", but he truly is a “Daddy” in our family. When he was finally able to hold Sweet Pea once again, the tears in his eyes told me everything I needed to know. There are no words to describe what this loving man has selflessly given over the last 7+ years to this journey of international adoption. And even more so NOW, during this difficult family separation time. He has never once wavered in his commitment to our precious family & has graciously helped in trying to make the best of our current situation. An amazing man . . .

The “rest” of the family (US side) – G’ma, aunts, uncles, cousins . . . many old friends & new friends . . . all have been a constant support & encouragement over the last year. The wonderful technology of skype has kept us all connected . . . we are possibly closer now than ever before . . . who would have thought it possible . . . amazing . . . ?!!?

Our “new” Pakistani family – Papa Karim, Samir, Shelina . . . the g.house staff . . . St Thomas Church . . . our Pakistan barristers & “all” in Faisalabad have been right here with us in Pakistan. The perfect people, in the perfect place, in the perfect time! I’m so thankful & blessed.

God’s Love & Goodness have been a constant source of strength. My Faith keeps me steady & sincere Grace has been my beacon. The Truth will make itself known! I read recently “God doesn’t waste our sorrows, disappointments or strife”. I’m hanging on to this, knowing that the future holds great promise & opportunities for God’s glory to shine brightly.

So, here we are . . . a loving family taking on life’s challenges . . . step-by-step.

Mama :)

Hello, from Pakistan - I-290B Appeal

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Sun, 18 Sep 2011 23:35:00 +0000

Another month in Pakistan . . . going on 250 days, 35+ weeks, 8+ months!

I apologize for the lengthy delay in update . . .

August - Well what can I say about August, that wasn't said about July . . . I just thought July was my hardest month! Isn't it wonderful that we don't have the crystal ball to know what is coming down our path? . . . we probably would never step foot on the path! But, our heavenly Father stands firmly with us, never leaving us, many times . . . carrying us . . . It reminds me of that poem "Footprints in the Sand".

Most of the month of August was spent waiting on the USCIS decision to our applicant appeal response to the NOID (Notice of Intent to Deny). However, I did enjoy the holy Islamic month, Ramadan, from a religious point. It's always interesting when you begin to understand another religion. I do try to understand . . . & respect the tenets of Islam. The end of the month of Ramadan marks the holiest of days, Eid (8/31/11), which is the beginning of the new Islamic year (based on Islamic calendar). The wonderful g.house family included us in their Eid celebration this year & we felt right at home. Just like Christmas! . . . where food & fellowship with family is wonderful.

Wednesday (8/18) – Mr. Karim took me to an "Iftari" buffet & dinner. The restaurant was Jahangir (pronounced like John Deer only John Geer). Iftar is the traditional fast breaking evening meal/feast, which begins 1st with prayers, then everyone eats 3 dates (yes, it must be 3 - observance of how Mohammad broke his fast), followed by fruit juices (gradually eases the body out of 14-16 hours of fast). Then, you sample the many types of finger foods - fresh fruit chaat (salad), chana chaat (cooked vegetable salad), somosas (triangle shaped pastry filled with minced meat), pakora (cold mashed potato w/onion & spice deep fried in oil), spicy chicken wings, etc - followed by a big cold glass of cold "lassi" (watered down yogurt. To me, it tastes like soured milk. yes, as in the milk in the frig has expired, but people love it here!). Actually, Iftar to me is a meal, but that is only the "fast breaking" part of the evening. Some people make their evening meal out of the Iftari food (sort of like "happy hour" in the US!). But, just like any holiday, most go for the full feast - after the fast is broken with Iftar, you can then enjoy an overwhelming dinner of all kinds of Pakistani dishes - it really is quite the feast!.

Tuesday (8/23) - Over skype, Uppa D read the USCIS decision to our applicant response to the NOID . . . Denial. We were anticipating a long wait, like 1-2 months . . . but it came very quickly, in only a week! It was once again shipped to my US residence address from New Delhi via FedEx, so the official date of the denial is 8/18/11. So, we now have an official Denial to the I-600 orphan status classification. We do have an official appeal option - It is called the I-290B Appeal & we only have 30 days to file it.

Tears flowed today over the decision. And, I'm needing to "live" with this decision for awhile before sharing it with everyone. Needless to say, it has broken my heart! Very disappointing & a very big blow to our case. I have been on skype many times with my family . . . But, through it all . . . there is no doubt that I will appeal this decision, continue fighting for Gracy's future. Somehow, someway the Truth will make itself known!

The g.house family is also heartbroken . . . & a special fasting prayer is said for us. Mr. Karim & family makes the next few days of the holy month & holidays very special for us.

Wednesday (8/24) - Our US pediatrician is wanting an MRI of Gracy's brain. So, today we go to the Islamabad Diagnostic Center to have it done. The procedure is an hour long procedure & Gracy will need to be anesthetized to be immobilized for the lengthy procedure. Samir accompanies us & keeps mama preoccupied during the procedure. Once it is over, it takes another 45 minutes for Gracy to recover from the anesthesia. It was actually a deeper anesthesia than when she had her tongue tie surgery! After 30 minutes in recovery & nothing, I was getting very worried. She ran a very high fever at the end & had to be given Ibruphen to reduce the fever. It was a little scary . . . but she is doing just fine now! For this mama, it is always difficult to watch my child go under anithesia. They are so innocent & trusting . . . my heart just aches knowing I'm putting them through a medical procedure that sedates them. I'm always glad when it is over!

We get the hard films & softcopy/DVD films, along with the report, the next day. I send it on to the US for our pediatrician & pediatric neurologist for further evaluation.

Monday (8/29) - I was again treated to an Iftari buffet & Ramadan dinner. Shelina & Samir took me this time. It was a beautiful roof top restaurant at the Envoy Continential Hotel. The evening was fairly cool & we watched the sun set over the city of Islamabad. Very beautiful & the night sky absolutely gorgeous.

Tuesday (8/30) - A major day of laundry! I pretty much have it down to a science now, but it still takes a major amount of time! But, in the evening . . . Gracy, Shelina & Mama were treated to the special Eid tradition of "Mehndi". This is henna artistry. It's temporary & only lasts about a week. It was so much fun! They do this type of "bling, bling" make-up for special occasions like Eid, weddings, etc (major celebrations). Gracy had a very hard time keeping her sweet, little hands still, so we opted for the henna "stamp" on her palms. I've also attached a picture of both Gracy & Mama's hands with their "Mehndi". If you goggle Mehndi, you will find pictures of very elaborate designs. It's so much FUN!

Wednesday (8/31) - Eid ul-Fitr Mubarak!! Pretty much like our Christmas. After a month of fasting & prayer, everyone dresses in new clothes for Eid, sweets are given & a feast is eaten with close friends/family. The markets were packed during the evenings of Ramadan, everyone shopping! It is traditional to give gifts of sweets on Eid, so the g.house had many packages of "sweets" coming through the door! And, Gracy & Mama received a very yummy cake from Mr. Karim. Gracy & Mama were also invited to attend the evening Eid dinner with the g.house family. A beautiful restaurant, with a wonderful family. Gracy was dressed as pretty as a princess - a beautiful pink dress with lots & lots of tulle, crinoline petticoats, sparkling beads & matching pink shoes (picture attached). The part she liked the best . . . her bangles! You just can't be properly dressed in Pakistan without the "bling" of bangles! Gracy's were pink/silver to match & she just couldn't leave them alone! I think we got home with a "couple" unbroken! The meal was wonderful with all the traditional Pakistani holiday trimmings. And, wonderful fellowship with our gracious hosts.

The Eid celebration lasts for 3 days. So, Islamabad & all of Pakistan basically shut down for the rest of the week.

September has brought many busy tasks/objectives for our case . . .

Monday (9/5) - My immigration attorney complained directly to the Consul General of the New Delhi USE about the process of how our evidence was examined for orphan status. However after a week with no response back, we have decided to officially appeal through the I-290B appeal process. We have 30 days from the date of the Denial (8/18/11). It takes about 4 days to FedEx from the US to New Delhi, so we have only about 1.5 weeks to complete the I-290B form. We will ask for the 30 day extension to submit our new legal brief w/evidence. Going down this appeal path will be a lengthy process. It will 1st go back to New Delhi for a 2nd review. Should that review produce a favorable, overturned decision (yes, one can hope!) then the appeal process will end there & we will have Gracy officially classified as an orphan & can move forward with her immigrant visa. If the decision remains a denial, it will then be forwarded on to the AAO (appeal board) in Washington D.C. This is where all the immigrant appeals from all over the world funnel into, so our appeal goes into the queue & we have to wait our turn. This can take as long as 2 years, but will surely be at least 6-12 months. So, we will need to adjust our waiting expectation . . . for a long duration.

Wednesday (9/7) - Our Gracy Girl truns 27 months old!

Thursday (9/8) - Finally, received the online confirmation for the I-160 non-immigrant medical B visa application. Now, I can take the confirmation & file for a visa interview appointment. To do that, I had to go to the approved American Visa Services Center, pay the visa fee (13,030 rupees, $150), submit Gracy's passport, a 2x2 visa picture, copy of the confirmation & my identity proof (copy of my passport). When it was all said & done, I still had a very difficult time getting an interview appointment. The I-160 visa application (I'm assuming all non-immigrant visa applications are this way) did not have a relationship category for "guardian" so, I was advised to use "other" as the relationship throughout Gracy's application. Well, this just created more problems at the visa center . . . Even though Gracy's passport has a guardianship disclaimer stamp for me on the inside cover, signed/endorsed by the Ministory of Interior/Passport, the visa center would only go by what was listed in the "parent" field of her passport & also the "parent" field of the visa application. Both have to list the b.father, at this point. So, the application said I was "other" & the passport didn't have me listed in the parent field . . . after 3 calls to the USE & an hour of wait, I was finally given the interview appointment. I just hope & pray once I get to the USE for the visa interview, this will all be understood & accepted as the truth.

Our medical visa interview is Wed, 9/21/11 at 9:00 a.m. (US - 11:00 p.m. Tues). Please pray for the USE to have open hearts & minds.

Monday (9/12) - The I-290B Appeal is officially sent via FedEx from the US to New Delhi. It should be received in 3-4 days. I pray a special prayer today as our case journeys on. We have also filed for a 30 day extension to have amble time to prepare a new legal brief with additional evidence. We don't know what that "additional" evidence will be, at this point, since we have given USCIS everything that supports Gracy's orphan status. But, we are going to comb through everything & see if we can produce additional legal opinions from Pakistani legal experts to help in clarifying the legal Pakistani law issues that USCIS seems to have with our case.

Thursday (9/15) - I have decided to share our story. So, during the month of August & September, I have been working with different media sectors to have our story told. Today, we finalized an article that will be published in the Tulsa Wold, Sunday, 9/18/2011 (below is the link). My hope & prayer is that people will finally understand what a compelling case this is & the truth will finally make itself known. The truth about a baby girl, her deserving right to be adopted into a loving family & her right to live beyond being a victim of child trafficking.

Friday (9/16) - Nicky's Gotcha Day! Our 7th Family-versary! I can't believe it has been 7 years since I first met my sweet Tyoma & we became a family! It is all so fresh in my memory. I'll never forget & I relive it over & over again. What precious memories!

Thank you, my sweet little boy, for making my life so wonderful!!! I love you more than the whole world!

Yealo Blu Tebia, Tyoma! :)

Sunday (9/18) - link to the Tulsa World article below. Please feel free to forward the link to your family & friends and anyone that you think would be interested in our story. Thank You!

http://www.tulsaworld.com/news/article.aspx?subjectid=11&articleid=20110918_11_A16_CUTLIN134753

Although Gracy does have a medical condition of hydrocephalus, she is really doing very, very well . . and gaining every day. She is now officially into size 4 (diapers & shoes). She can still wear her 18 month clothes, but they are short! 2 year old sizes are still a bit big, but she is growing fast! She is currently in the 25-30% on the growth charts for W/L (yeah!!). She is a sweet, bubbly, lively, talking toddler & keeps everyone at the g.house on their toes! She is perfect in Mama's eyes. She is pure Joy! :)
Her measurements:
Weight - 27 lbs
Length - 34"
HC - 20.5" (this puts her in the 95+%, actually almost off the charts for hc).

Gracy’s New Words . . . Gracy is also learning Urdu words!

“Bel-come or sometimes Pel-come" – Welcome
“Beeee-leez" - Please
She can say most of all the basic colors & we are working on shapes now.
"A-ja" - Come here (Urdu)
"Ya-lay" - Take it (Urdu)
"Ta-Ta" - Bye-Bye (Urdu)

I have been asked by many "How are you holding up?" Actually, pretty well. There are those difficult days (homesick for my Nicky!). . . but I pick myself up through the encouragement & support of my wonderful family/friends in both the US & Pakistan. Without this wonderful support network, it would be . . . very difficult. I consider the precious individuals that are living through this with me to be "angels" on my shoulder. They bless me everyday with their support, encouragement & dedication to Gracy's story. I am humbled & grateful . . . all I can say is Thank You!

And . . . my faith holds me steady!

Take care . . . talk to you soon! (kiss & hug your family tonight!)

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - USCIS Orphan Status Applicant Response Appeal

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 23:49:00 +0000

Another couple of weeks in Pakistan . . . going on 210 days, 30 weeks, 7 months!

July was been a very challenging month . . . however, I’m still standing! J yeah, yeah, yeah . . .! (I couldn’t help it, I’m singing it in my head!)

August is here, and is the Islam holy month of “fasting & prayer”, Ramadan. The markets, stores, restaurants, the whole country basically shuts down for a month. Fasting is from “dawn to dusk”, & starts at ~ 4:00 a.m. & runs through until just after 7:00 p.m. So, life is very, very quiet right now, even the traffic through the g.house has slowed down to a trickle. In the evening at sunset, families gather for the Iftar “fast-breaking” meal. The stores that sell the Iftar foods open in the evening after the Iftar is over & are basically the only stores open for the 1st days of Ramadan.

(7/21 – 7/31) - The last 2 weeks of July were spent with follow up medical visits for Gracy. I have found out there are no pediatric speech therapists in Pakistan! So, I have been working with her myself to help strengthen her tongue muscles & “stick out” her tongue! This should help in her delayed speech acquisition. However, she has found this very difficult, since she has never been able to “stick out” her tongue before now! Little by little . . . it is creeping out past her lips!

Gracy also has another medical condition that we have been monitoring since early spring. In early February, she was diagnosed with Hydrocephalus. At this point, she shows no signs of developmental delays or brain damage. But, her frontal lobe ventricles are completely full with fluid . . . so we are being very careful!

As a result of her medical conditions, we are trying to obtain a non-immigrant medical B visa. If approved, this would allow her to travel to the US with me for medical treatment for an interim, temporary amount of time. It is a very difficult visa to be approved (especially if you have a pending immigrant visa in process) . . . & we couldn’t apply for a non-immigrant visa until after we had received the USCIS decision for orphan status, which determines the immigrant visa. I feel I need to exhaust every possible option of returning to the US with my little girl as soon as possible, so we are going to try for it! However, in order to make application for this visa, I have to be physically present to submit the application dossier to the USE here in Islamabad. So, over the last couple of weeks, I have been diligently trying to get all the necessary medical statements from both Pakistan & the US to support our visa application.

(8/1 – 8/5) – We have been very busy with preparing our Applicant Response to the Notice of Intent to Deny (NOID). It was finally sent to USCIS New Delhi, Friday, 8/5. No electronic files can be sent, all original hard copy docs required, sent via FedEx.

Saturday (8/6) – For the last 2.5 months, I have been trying to find a trustworthy family, individual or living situation for Gracy . . . The last resort is to leave Gracy here & return to the US without her for a few months (depending on our USCIS timeline for orphan status review decision OR USE/ISL timeline for medical B visa decision). It is very difficult to think about this option . . . but I must be thinking ahead should our next set of “wait” be lengthy, again. So, today, I visited with a possible family that has come recommended through a Christian friend. Needless to say, it has been very difficult to find someone that is willing to take on the responsibility of a small child, for an unknown amount of time. But, should our wait be again several months, I do know God will provide the loving, secure, healthy environment needed to take care of Gracy. It is a lot to ask of someone & that someone has to be just right . . . for the best interests of our sweet pea! Please pray . . . that I don’t have to utilize this option! But, pray . . . should that be the case . . . the perfect, loving individual & environment will make itself known & be ready.

Sunday (8/7) – Gracy turns 26 months old today!

Church at St Thomas. As we sang “Because He Lives”, my heart was touched with the following 2nd verse . . . It speaks for our situation.

“How sweet to hold
A newborn baby
And feel the pride
And joy (s)he gives
But greater still
The calm assurance
This child can face
Uncertain days
Because He lives“

Monday (8/8) - Through the FedEx tracking number, the FedEx package has arrived in New Delhi with our Applicant Response to the NOID. However, I’m told it will take 1-2 weeks before we will have a notice of receipt from USCIS that it has “officially” been received. The explanation for the time delay . . . it takes that long to travel from the central mail room (in ND) to the appropriate USCIS office (also in ND). Yes . . . it takes longer to “find” the right USCIS office within the same city, than it does to ship from the US to India! Go figure! J By now, I’ve stopped asking why & have just accepted that once a case file reaches a USCIS/USE office, it goes into “file 13”, just because . . . So, hopefully in a couple of weeks, we will have a timeframe for decision review . . . we will ask for an expedited timeframe, but there are no guarantees that USCIS will give us an expedited review.

Tuesday (8/9) – Today is my last employment day with Helmerich & Payne . . . Yes, very sad indeed. But, life does need to move on . . . For those that wish to continue with my adoption update, please email me at novokbb2@yahoo.com . I will be emailing from this email address & will change the distro list accordingly. You can also email me anytime using this personal email address.

Wednesday (8/10) – In the morning, a visit to a Catholic orphanage in Rawalapindi (40 min drive from Islamabad). A possible interim living situation for Gracy. A German friend from St Thomas that runs an orphanage/hostel for 5 year old + girls suggested this orphanage. I’ll visit with the sisters & see the facilities. Later in the day, another doctor’s visit for Gracy, hopefully ending with a medical statement stating medical treatment is needed in the US!

Looking back over my adoption update emails, I noticed I have never shared pictures of the guest house. So, below is the link to the New Cape Grace website. I have stayed in Rooms 26 (where Gracy, Uppa D & I stayed), 23, 28 & for the last 2.5 months 25 (a very small room). Now you can see where I spend most of my time during the day! Click on the TripAdvisor widget (under Services) & read the reviews. Pictures also of Karim & Samir. This gives you an idea of who Karim & Samir truly are, a wonderful family!

http://www.newcapegrace.com/

Gracy’s New Words . . . She is just beginning to start putting 2 words sentences together! We have a loooonnnggg way to go, but it is coming through loud & clear, at least to Mama! :)

“I Uv” – “I Love You” at this point, but Mama knows exactly what Gracy is trying to say . . . soooo incredibly sweet to hear!
“All Done!” or sometimes “Me Done” – Enough said!

Gracy loves to dance & sing . . . so below are a few favorites that I hear throughout the day (yes, I know . . . get it on video!).
“. . . up a uv . . . high . . .” – this is “twinkle, twinkle little star”. Gracy loves this song & I hear her singing these words . . . she even has the actions down!
“. . . impy der . . . – yes, hard to decipher, but its “Itsy, Bitsy Spider”! The actions, let you know exactly what song it is J Her little fingers try so hard!
“Uv . . . ME!” – this is from our FAVORITE song! We sing the hymn “Love Lifted Me” every night before bed & many times throughout the day. Grace belts out a resounding “ME” everytime.

Mama is also learning some Urdu (Pakistani language). Here are just a few of what I use every day!

“Sallam, vey da coom” - Hello
“Ka-da-ha-fus” – Good Bye
“Ta-Ta” – Bye Bye
“Shuck-ria” – Thank You
“Gee” – Yes
“Nay-hee-n” – No
(for those quick no-no moments its . . . nay nay!)
“Bosh” – Enough
“Ah-chah” – good
“Va-va” – very good
“Tee-kay” – OK?
“Cal-hal-hey” – How are you?
“In-shall-alla” – By God’s will/in God’s time
“Mein Tumsea Peeyart Karta Hoon” – My fav . . . I Love You! For both my children, I start every day & end every night with “I Love You (b.name)” in their birth country language, along with their birth name. I’m hoping by daily telling them I Love You in Russian/Urdu, it lets them know just how much I love the “special-ness” of our family & the value I place on their country of birth.

So, here we are again . . . current!

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - USCIS Orphan Status Approval/Immigrant Visa

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 23:58:00 +0000

Another week in Pakistan . . . going on 190 days, 27 weeks, 6.5 months!

Some weeks are just simply harder than others . . . & this week has been the most difficult so far! . . . Even in the dark valleys, God is Joy, True, Just & Faithful! :)

Tuesday (7/12) – No news from USCIS.

Throughout this week, we are dealing with the Giardia (intestinal parasite) as best we can . . . Whew! the last couple of days Gracy has gone through 15-20 diapers a day! (Yes, that is correct! During the worst of it, in 1 hour I changed her 4 times!) So . . . we didn’t go ANYWHERE this week. Stayed close to the g.house.

Saturday (7/16) – Skyped with Uppa D (cousin Dalend) & Nicky.

USCIS New Delhi sent the I-600 Orphan Status Decision to my US residence address via FedEx. Today, Uppa D received it, opened the FedEx envelope & read USCIS’s decision to me . . . Marina Grace’s I-600 orphan status has been Denied . . . we are all so disappointed! This document is the NOID (Notice of Intent to Deny) which will go into effect after a 30 day wait for applicant response. I have consulted with my immigration attorney, who is experienced with Pakistani immigrations, specifically IR-4 adoption immigration visas, and I have been counseled that MG’s case facts are definitely legally strong & in compliance with USCIS orphan status guidelines. So, we will be responding back to the NOID (Notice of Intent to Deny) within the 30 day trimeframe with a counter response based on a legal, sound argument for orphan status. We have no timeline for the USCIS reply to our NOID response, however, I'm told by my attorney, it could take several months & should we have to appeal the final Denial, possibly 2 years before a final resolution. So . . . we hang on knowing that “Truth will make itself known”. And, praying that USCIS will respond favorably to our NOID response.

Sunday (7/17) – After 8 days of treatment for Giardia, Gracy is retested at the diagnostic lab . . . We will get the test results/report back tomorrow.

Monday (7/18) – The lab report came back with no signs of Giardia cysts! YEAH! We go see Dr. Rubina tonight for a follow up.

While we are at Dr. Rubina’s clinic . . . much discussion is had over Gracy’s medical condition, Ankyloglossia (tongue-tie). In May, Gracy was diagnosed with a very severe, thick tongue-tie condition which requires surgery to release her tongue. The prognosis - excellent! However, since Gracy is in such a critical stage of language acquisition & she will not be allowed to travel to the US within the next several months, the decision has been made to have her tongue-tie corrected through surgery here in Islamabad.

So over the next couple days, I’m deep in . . . researching medical doctors, somewhat difficult, child specialists are few & far between. As with anything in Pakistan . . . you have to be extremely careful & know that you know!

Tuesday (7/19) – Late in the evening, I finally consult a surgeon at the Ali Medical Center that performs the Ankyloglossia tongue release procedure on children with general anesthesia & with reconstruction of the underside of the tongue (very important in MG’s severe case so adhesions/reattachment does not occur). The surgeon is UK trained & seems to be very experienced with the severity of MG’s case. However, the surgeon’s schedule is very tight & for the next 2 weeks, he is only available late Wednesday night as a possibly surgery option. So, at 9:00 p.m. I take MG to be examined by Dr Nadeem for a possibly surgery the following evening. It is a severe case, but all looks good & he is confident that the procedure he performs (very similar to UK & US) will permanently correct the Ankyloglossia. I’m told, the procedure is considered “routine” & will take ~ 30 minutes. After the general anesthesia has worn off & if she is doing well, we can take her home (g.house home!). However, she may be kept overnight, if necessary.

Wednesday (7/20) – Tonight is Gracy’s surgery . . . 9:15 p.m. PST/11:15 a.m. US CST. Yes, Mama is very anxious. I think anytime a parent makes the decision to place their child under anesthesia, in a “coma” state . . . and, as your child looks at you with loving trust, you watch them “go under” . . . it brings the reality of the intense, enormous responsibility that a parent has for the life of a child. As a parent, you research, gain the best possible information you can obtain & then you make the decision. I have felt that enormous weight of responsibility 2 different times with Nicky’s medical needs . . . Believe me, it doesn’t get any easier, especially in a 3rd world country!

I pray my decision has been based on sound, medical advice & expertise! A mother’s prayer said over our sweet Marina Grace & a prayer for a very quick recovery time. Please pray for the surgeon’s diligent, competent hands . . . operating on such a tiny sweetheart. :)

Gracy’s New Words . . .

“Manier” “Sattod” “Comaran” . . . all guest house staff . . . Gracy is learning who she can wrap around her finger!!!!
"Peez" (please) – This brings joy to Mama’s heart that my sweetie is sooo polite. She now says Please & Thank You!
“Coke” – Yes, can you believe it!

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - USCIS Orphan Status Approval/Immigrant Visa

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 00:04:00 +0000

Another 2+ weeks in Pakistan . . . going on 182 days, 26 weeks, 6 months!

Say hello to the Monsoon Season . . . rain, rain, rain!!! It seems to only rains at night, which doesn’t cool anything down . . . just makes the next day extremely hot, humid/muggy.

Monday (7/4) – Happy 4th of July! Gracy dressed in her red, white & blue outfit (I brought for the USE interview) & Mama wore a blue, white & pink shalwar kameez (as close to r/w/b as I could get!). We spent a very quiet day at the guest house . . . unfortunately, we are not feeling that well. And, we ended up the day at Dr Rubina’s office. It seems that “something” is giving both of us a hard time!!! Actually, Mama has lost count of the times we have had dysentery. So, MG will go through some testing over the next 2-3 days to see what is going on in her tummy. Dr Rubina took Mama’s blood pressure & it is very low, so a saline/glucose replacement is now a must. Hopefully, we will be back to health soon!

Tuesday (7/5) – This is the week that the USCIS in New Delhi gave us as the deadline (15 days) for the final decision on MG’s orphan status (I-600 application). So far, we have not heard anything & hopefully, the Senator’s office will follow up to confirm the decision. I am waiting on pins-n-needles . . .

MG began intestinal testing today to see if she has any kind of parasitic infection in her tummy. Mama is suspicious of a parasite, called Giardia, that is known to plague orphanages & 3rd world countries. Of course, it could be just another simple case of gastrointestinitis (mama has had this, oh so many times over the last few months!). We have 3 days of intestinal sample testing 1st thing in the morning at a diagnostic lab about 15 minutes from the g.house. . . so today we started our early am taxi ride to the Islamabad Diagnostic Center (IDC).

Wednesday (7/6) – Another early am trek for intestinal sample at the IDC.

We also found out today that USCIS ND has finally responded to the 15 day deadline on our I-600 application . . . unfortunately, they are still not able to make an orphan status determination & have delayed the decision due to a “clarification” issue. We are not privy to what the issue is, just that there will be another delay. The S.office, on our behalf, is asking for a new timeline for this delay . . . we will see if USCIS will respond back with another estimated timeline. The S.office is diligently trying to help in every way possible, however, one has to be very careful with how you “ask” about an I-600/Immigrant Visa application case (especially in this part of the world). An applicant is not privy to the case’s specific details of the “process”. And, if there are any applicant “demands” this is considered “manipulation” by the applicant . . . & is against USCIS guidelines (in short, illegal & your application will be denied). Especially, in this part of the world & during the current events of US/Pakistan relations . . . everything is supposedly double & triple checked. So, we/S.office are being very cautious & careful on how we ask & what we ask for . . . I’m not sure how a 2 yo can place an entire country’s security at risk . . . but the policy of “process” is non-negotiable. So we Wait . . .

Thursday (7/7) – Marina Grace turns 25 months old!!!

Unfortunately, we are both not 100%. This is the 3rd day of intestinal testing for MG & appointment with Dr Rubina. As Mama had suspected . . . Gracy has tested positive for the intestinal parasite, Giardia. So, Mama probably has it as well. At least it gives us an answer on why over the last month we have become sicker each day with dysentery. We have medicine now! As much medicine as we have gone through over the last 6 months . . . thank goodness medicine in Pakistan is very economical!!! There is no way of telling where MG picked Giardia up . . . she could have had it all along . . . & passed it to Mama, who knows . . . We will have about 7-10 days of treatment & then MG will be tested again. Hopefully, our nasty “tummy friend” will be gone! :)

There is a young couple staying at the g.house for a couple of months . . . their baby girl & Gracy have become fast friends & love playing together. It is so nice to have a playmate for Gracy (MG is action packed & needs LOTS of activity). The sweet mother is a delight to visit with, as well. The family is from Karachi (far south). We have spent many evenings (the coolest part of the day) over the last month playing in the garden with Gracy & baby F.

The S.office is to find out the new timeline estimate for orphan status decision by Friday 7/8. It is a disappointment to be delayed, once again . . . & we are still just on the I-600 orphan status decision. There is still the immigrant visa process to go through after the I-600. I’m told by the USE/ISL the immigrant visa process will take 5-10 days minimum (without any issues). However, I’m also told the US/Pak relations have become so strained that the process will probably become even longer over the next 1-2 months.

Over the next few days . . . Mama & Gracy are still pretty weak from the Giardia. Gracy is bouncing back quicker than Mama . . . I’m so thankful for the g.house family, they have stepped in to help with childcare while Mama is, let’s just say, battling Giardia :)

Saturday (7/9) – The Tulsa Little League Baseball All-Star tryouts are today! For the 2nd year, Nicholas tries out . . . we will see if he makes 1 of the 4 All-Star teams. When Mama talked to him over skype, Nicky assured mama that he had a great time & he did a “great job”! Nicky sounded so excited about his efforts & Uppa D concurred that Nicky did a great job . . . of course, we think he is an “all-star” regardless of the outcome!!!

Mama felt well enough to go shopping with Shelina (g.house owner’s daughter) in Rawalipindi (sister city to Islamabad). “Pindi” is very close to Islamabad, takes about 50-60 minutes by taxi. It isn’t the miles, it is the TRAFFIC! I have never experienced traffic like this . . . cars, motorcycles, bicycles, carts w/horses/mules/oxen, rickshaws . . . all on a 2 lane highway trying to pretend it is 4-6 lanes! Honestly, it was simply amazing. On TV/magazines, I have seen/read many times about the traffic in India, China, Hong Kong, etc . . . but never have experienced it. I now can say I HAVE! The congestion with horns & shouting & people . . . simply amazing! And . . . then the markets . . . another entirely amazing experience. People everywhere!!!! Little shops that seem to go on & on forever, twisting/turning this way & that way. One “mall” (large concrete building divided into tiny little shops) may be for clothing (women & children together in a mall, men’s clothing in a separate mall; got to keep those genders separate, lol!), another for furniture, another for cosmetics (yes, 1 entire mall for cosmetics!), another for carpets, another for . . . you name it, it is in Pindi! Everyone goes to Pindi to shop! We were at the market for over 7 hours, shopping for Shalwar Kameez suits for Shelina (she has a new job!) & of course, Mama had to get in the shopping action as well (I bought a few, as well!). Anyway . . . the entire 7 hours we were at the market in Pindi . . . I never saw a foreigner. I was the lone one! Of course, by now, I am so used to the stares & whispers back-n-forth . . . I don’t even notice it!

Monday (7/11) – The S.office is diligently trying to find out some kind of update on our case . . . so far, no news. So . . . we are back in the Wait. Such a familiar place, yet so very frustrating to be faced with the “unknown” once again. I’m trying to keep the stress/worry/strain/tension at bay . . . but it is difficult since we have been living in Pakistan now 6 months. What will another month bring? . . . I do know that God has a plan . . . Trust & Faith!

Right now the days are slow & steady . . . the Heat is constant, Giardia is intense, the Wait seems forever, . . . but we know, this too shall pass J In the meantime, Gracy has become the g.house “Greeter” (sort of like the Walmart Greeter!). Lately, she has spent a great deal of time with “Papa” Karim (since Mama has not been feeling too well). So, Gracy “greets” anyone coming or going from the g.house. She makes sure that they shake her hand 1st , then she waves “bye-bye” or “hello” & gives them a “fly kiss”. (mental note to self – I have to get a video of this!) Papa Karim & everyone are so surprised at her sweet confidence at only 2 yo. She is fearless/strong & yet so sweet! Our Marina Grace is a very delightful, special child . . . full of Promise!

Gracy’s New Words . . .

"Now" – Hmmmmm, I wonder where she has heard this one! :)
"Va Va" – In Urdu, this means “very good”. Papa Karim has taught Gracy this word! She walks around saying it over & over . . . along with “Wow”!
“Done” – She lets Mama know when she is “done” with anything . . . eating, bath, book reading, etc.
“Outside” – Gracy longs to be outside, playing in the garden, with KeeKee (kitty) or just sitting in her stroller watching the traffic go by (She loves big trucks/buses & shouts/waves to them as they go by). She also loves to go on walks, although we have minimized these lately due to security risks.

We are diligently praying & hopeful for good news . . . any day.

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - USCIS Orphan Status Approval/Immigrant Visa

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 29 Jun 2011 00:16:00 +0000

Another 2+ weeks in Pakistan . . . going on 168 days, 24 weeks, 5.5+ months!

Monday (6/13) – After many attempts to obtain information on the status of our case with USCIS, last week we finally contacted Senator Inhofe’s office to help in breaking through the “wall of silence”. Through the Senator’s office we finally found out that the I-600 form (Application to Classify Orphan as an Immediate Relative), which is the critical application for Gracy’s orphan status approval, was never sent to New Delhi from Islamabad along with the electronic file of documents/investigation dispositions/etc on 5/31/11, when the rest of the electronic file was sent. Without the completed I-600, the case file is considered incomplete & it was ignored. Today, the S.office made an inquiry into the I-600 form’s existence (I submitted the form 4/21/11) with the USE/Dept of State/Islamabad. We now know, the form is currently with USE/Islamabad & the S.office has made an official request for it to be sent to New Delhi asap.

Wednesday (6/15/) – S.office follow up to confirm the receipt of the I-600 at the USCIS office in New Delhi. The S.office also requested an expedited timeline to be given asap on when a final decision of orphan status eligibility will be given.

Thursday (6/16) – New Delhi has given the S.office an estimated timeline of 16 business days to process the I-600 & give a final decision on Gracy’s orphan status eligibility. So we wait . . . until 7/4. But, remember this is only an estimate. :)

Over the next couple of weeks the daily routine is very much the same . . . waiting for a final decision from New Delhi USCIS on Gracy’s orphan status . . . along with the daily chores of child care, surviving the heat & living at the guest house. Yes, the walls are slowing closing in! We don’t do our neighborhood walks like we used to or strolls to the market . . . recent bombings in Islamabad have made it very risky. I keep a very low profile, but the g.house is very safe/secure, so I live in my own little “bubble”. I don’t venture out much by myself . . . & when I do, a g.house staff/guard accompanies me or Karim pre-arranges the entire errand so he knows where I am at all times. However, the caution does make for very slow days, but we are making the best of it.

Gracy is pure Joy & I try to remember that I will not have this kind of uninterrupted, one-on-one time with her again, so . . . I’m trying to enjoy my precious baby girl (she is growing so fast!) & not worry about “the decision”. She is just so cute & her toddler activity is just so precious to watch. I can’t take it in enough. I know it will be gone in a blink of an eye. As far as the “final decision”, it is in God’s hands. He knows the love & devotion I have for this sweet, little girl & I just have to trust that ALL is being taken care of. I have prayed for high-profile guidance & Senator Inhofe’s office has taken our case on with personal attention. We also have other states’ Senators & Congressmen watching/waiting & available to help, if need be. We are doing all that we can . . . guided by wisdom & faith! Please pray this week for divine intervention & guidance by these leaders.

Monday (6/27) – Since we really don’t know when we will be home, I decided that Gracy needed to have some professional photography portraits taken for her “2 year old” milestone. So, we attempted to do it today, after naptime . . . All I can say is . . . Uggghhhh, both Gracy & Mama were wiped out afterwards! Professional photography here in Islamabad is very different than the US. I did find a photography studio, but the photographer was not exactly “child friendly”. Gracy cried almost the entire time we were there. There was no a/c & it was extremely hot in the studio, with only one small fan . . . this baby girl just couldn’t take being told to sit/stand/hold . . . after about 15-20 minutes, she was past the point of tolerating anything an adult wanted her to do, with tears running down her face! Now that I know the photographer expects the parent to do “all the work” to pose the child . . . we will try again, but Mama will come prepared with toys, music & props!

Tuesday (6/28) – We try the photo studio session again . . . hoping Gracy is in a much better mood. We took her when it was much cooler, around 6:30 p.m. She had a good snack & bottle & diaper change before we left. We took the laptop computer to play music since Gracy loves to dance, hoping that would entice her to just “be her sweet little self” to capture that prefect picture. Unfortunately, again . . . Gracy wanted nothing to do with the camera & picture taking . . . the tears . . . oh, the tears!!!! We looked at the digital snaps & chose the best ones. I’m think we may have at least 1-2 good shots out of the many, many that were taken. Regardless, they will be special . . . since they were her 1st professional portraits & they were taken here in Pakistan. Since there is no sitting fee, I may try again in a few days . . . once the “trauma” has worn off! :)

The stray kitty that Gracy & I have adopted is getting stronger every day & is quite the active playmate for Gracy . . . however, there are employees of a UK NGO staying at the guest house for 2-3 weeks. They have also grown to love our little tabby. In fact, once they have their permanent housing approved & ready (in the next week) . . . they have asked if they can take the kitten with them. I know Gracy will miss sweet “Kee-Kee” (Gracy’s name for kitty), but KeeKee is going to a very good home.

Gracy’s New Words . . .

"Amen" – When we say grace & our night-night prayers . . . Gracy “helps” with babble, babble & then a very resounding AMEN at the end. This really is just so cute, one of the cutest so far!
"Wow" – She loves to hear herself & it sounds like she is actually “tasting” the word, saying it over & over & over! She even practices saying it in the mirror. Then she looks at me & says “Wow, Mama!”

I sincerely ask for a “prayer rally” this week. Pray for leadership wisdom & God's perfect plan for our sweet Marina Grace . . . We are diligently praying & hopeful for good news next week.

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - Nicholas & Baseball

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 29 Jun 2011 00:11:00 +0000

I missed a very important summer milestone in my Nicky’s life this last week . . .

Saturday (6/26) – Nicky participated in the Tulsa Little League Pitch, Hit & Run Challenge. He is such a baseball lover . . . anytime he gets to “play ball” he is all about it! He won 2 trophies - 2nd in the Pitch & 2nd in the Run. Nicky tells me that he was in the top 5 for quite a while in the Hit category. He was so excited & practically wanted to sleep with his trophies Sat night! We are all so very proud of our little baseball player! Mama is very, very proud! I just wished I could have been there to see it ALL! :)

Hello, from Pakistan - Gracy is 2!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 00:20:00 +0000

Another 2+ weeks in Pakistan . . . going on 149 days, 21+ weeks, 5.5 months! We have a very special Birthday coming up for our Sweet Pea, Gracy Girl !!!

I know I sound like a broken record . . . but, have I told you, AGAIN, how HOT it is here!!! My favorite taxi driver & I have a special way of saying hello - Nancy: "How hot will the drive be today?" Driver: "Today . . . HOT Drive!" Believe me, I will welcome the "hot" Oklahoma summer of 2-3 weeks of just 100 degree weather! But, truly . . . it is only a minor inconvenience! :)

Monday (5/23) - I received a call from the USE/Islamabad late in the afternoon. The Islamabad "decision" has been made . . . the case's timeline orphan status "facts" is too "complex" for USE/Islamabad to approve Gracy's IR-4 adoption permanent immigrant visa. The case will now be sent on to New Delhi, India for final decision/processing. Yes, the tears flowed & flowed & flowed tonight! My family & I skyped for comfort. The guest house family (Karim, Shelina & Sameer, bless them!) helped me weather through the disappointment. Gracy & I will not be coming home this week, next week or . . . for sometime. During the call, I did ask for special permission to speak to the USE official that has made this decision. I have a "possible" appt with him tomorrow morning. Hopefully, I can get a better explanation on what this "no approval" decision means & the status of the case from this individual.

Tuesday (5/24) - I was able to speak with the Mgr of American Citizens Services Unit this morning. I was not allowed a personal, face-to-face appointment with him (which I had requested), but I was able to directly speak with him via phone. He explained that the USE/Islamabad has only a very basic USCIS office & has authority to approve only the very "straight forward" I-604 investigation cases. Our case is not "straight forward" . . . but is very complex with complicated timeline facts for orphan status eligibility & prospective adoptive parent status eligibility. Islamabad has not "denied" the immigrant visa, but neither has an "approval" been given. The electronic file & case has been sent "up the chain of command" so to speak . . . to the closest, fully staffed USCIS office . . . New Delhi, India. All is not lost with the I-604 processing done here in ISL. New Delhi will take the I-604 investigation facts that ISL has gathered & will begin a thorough review, again, from the inception of the case in 2009. However, the USE ACSU Mgr could not give an estimated timeline on how long this next level of processing will take . . . there is no average timeline . . . it could take a few days to several months . . . so, all I can do is wait. The next step is to wait a week & then follow up again with USE/ISL to see if I can be given a status update.

The rest of the week was the normal, daily childcare, laundry & catching up on work emails. I am starting to work a few hours each week to try to become re-introduced back into my work at H&P. I have regularly kept up on reading emails, but now I am actively responding & participating in specific tasks. It definitely helps in feeling "normal" again! LOL!

Tuesday (5/31) - I have waited a week for news that the electronic file has officially been sent on to New Delhi. I called the USE/ISL today to verify that the electronic file was sent last Wednesday. Yes, you have to follow up & make sure people are doing what they say they will do . . . "things" slip through the cracks (enough said!). So . . . yes, the file was sent. I'm told it will take a week to receive the electronic file in New Delhi &, at this point, ISL is no longer involved in the final decision & will not receive any status updates until the final decision is made. I'm told to forward any questions/concerns I have to New Delhi . . . I'm given a generic email address, which I'm told I may/may not get a response from, depending on my question/concern. I send an email plea to the New Delhi USCIS office, using the email address, to please provide me a "timeline estimate" on the process for immigrant visa decision. We will see what the next week brings . . . hopefully good news.

Saturday (6/4) - I picked up my new Pakistan visa extension this afternoon. Miracle worker, Shelina, was able to help me obtain a 6 month visa extension this time. The monthly extensions were bringing too much focus to my case & creating some issues with the Pakistan Ministry of Interior, so Shelina suggested this option. No one really knows how long the USCIS immigrant visa process in New Delhi, India will take . . . so we applied for a several month visa extension (very, very rare with a tourist visa) . . . so I can stay here in Pakistan with Gracy.

Gracy & I moved g.house rooms today. LOL :) . . . since we have been here, we have had 4 different rooms! Karim just keeps moving us, as he needs to best utilize his g.house accommodations for all his guests. At this point, we are like family & just move as needed! This time, however, was a "clean out" project. We had been staying several months in one particular room & mama had to go through & "clean house". Since our new room is smaller, I packed up all the items that we are not using . . . and now, we are down to just the bare essentials!

Monday (6/6) - A week has gone by since the last follow up on the USCIS decision. So, another follow up . . . I found out today that the I-600 form (the critical document for applying for an IR-4 immigrant visa, which I turned in on 4/21 to the USE/ISL) . . . was never sent along with the electronic file 2 weeks ago to New Delhi, India . . . without the I-600, nothing happens, the file was put at the bottom of the stack & not even looked at! No one at USCIS New Delhi & no one here in USE/ISL caught this important oversight . . . I could go on & on about the mismanagement of our case's electronic file, but it really serves no purpose . . . At this point, all I can do is pray . . . pray . . . pray for someone with "higher power" to take over with an "eye on the sparrow". I ask for prayers to be lifted up for the "appropriate, priority focus" on Gracy's case.

Nicky has his 1st Little League Baseball game tonight. My little guy is crazy about baseball. Please pray for me . . . I am a bit blue that I am missing out on so much of my Nicky's life these days. It is difficult to be away from my sweet Nicky, who I love more than life! However, G'ma, Uppa D & my wonderful family, neighbor & friends are helping fill in the gap for Mama . . . but my heart still aches for my "sweet baby, Tyoma"!

Tuesday (6/7) - Our Sweet Pea, Gracy Girl . . . TURNS 2 years old TODAY!!!! For a week, g.house owner Karim has been busy planning a birthday bash! In fact, his entire family has gone over & above. And . . . they have kept it all a secret from Mama & Gracy! Of course, Gracy doesn't have a clue what a birthday is . . . but she will enjoy the attention & have FUN . . . we all will.

The Big B-day started out with Gracy dressing in Mama's favorite . . . a pretty pink/white summer "frock" (as Pakistan calls a little girl's dress) with a big pink bow in her beautiful, dark brown hair. Pink is Gracy's color! Then there were BALLOONS - EVERYWHERE! Karim had ~ 150 balloons put up all around the g.house. Unfortunately, the heat began to pop the balloons before Gracy could get outside to see them . . . no matter . . . the effort was so appreciated! Once they started popping . . . Karim went out & bought even more balloons to bring to the g.house. Gracy had a lot of balloons to celebrate with! Next there was a special luncheon with the g.house staff. There are 6 young men that work at the g.house & have a special love for our Gracy Girl! They take turns each day taking care of Gracy while Mama works or runs errands or needs to attend a specific appointment. Gracy is a very, very active child & sitting still just doesn't come easy for her! LOL! So, if her personal presence is not required . . . she stays at the g.house & plays. Mama know that Karim/Sameer will make sure she is safe & well taken care of. So, it was only fitting that Gracy have a special b-day lunch with the staff! After lunch, she was taken into the common lobby area & she opened her "gifts". She had a small swimming pool & a toddler tricycle waiting for her! She oohhed & aahhed over each one. But, she immediately wanted to try out the tricycle! She can't quite work the pedals yet, so she just "scoots" with her feet to make it "go". She played & played . . . going back & forth from one end of the lobby to the other. Next, it was the "big time" . . . on to the driveway, one end to the other. Then she went swimming in her new pool! She loves water & splished/splashed everyone! We ALL kept cool for about an hour. Mama was wanting Gracy to nap for a bit, but Gracy had other ideas . . . she moved from tricycle to pool over & over again for hours. That evening was a special b-day celebration at a very nice restaurant, The Olive Garden (no, not the US Olive Garden!). It was a very, very nice restaurant . . . and Karim, Shalena & Sameer (once again) went above & beyond. A special table was decorated all in pink/white with party hats & the "works"! As Mama & Karim brought Gracy into the restaurant . . . candles were lit while singing "Happy Birthday"!!! Gracy's cake was a beautiful pink/white w/tiny blue flowers, Princess "Barbie Doll" cake (with a real Barbie Doll)! And . . . a big number 2 candle! All around the cake were lit tea candles that made the cake just glow . . . beautiful! Gracy (with the initial practice help of Sameer) did her best to blow out all her candles (Sameer helped). It was such a surprise b-day for our precious "Princess"! So, we had cake 1st (everyone deserves to have their cake 1st on their b-day, right!?!) After the cake & watching Gracy dance to the restaurant music, we ordered dinner. Wow! what a feast! Gracy had her normal 2 bites & then wanted her bottle of Nido (formula)! But . . . the adults had a wonderful meal! What a special, special b-day dinner. It was pretty late when we finally got back to the g.house & Gracy was still wide awake! This child doesn't miss anything! She wanted to play with the balloons, AGAIN! It was after midnight before she finally settled down enough to sleep & then ONLY if Mama would let her sleep with several of her balloons! LOL! What an amazing, special day! Words cannot express my gratitude/appreciation for everyone's efforts in making our Sweet Pea's 2nd birthday (but her very 1st b-day celebration) such a wonderful memory. Yes, I know the celebration was more for the adults than for Gracy, since she is so young & Gracy will probably not remember this special party day (& probably will be the only one she will celebrate in ISL) . . . but the adults will remember & we will forever share the memories with her.

Of course, once we are back in the US, we will have another Party BASH! It just HAS to be . . . because it will be such a wonderful, wonderful moment to FINALLY be back home with our Sweet Pea!!! Yes, everyone is invited!

Wednesday (6/8) - A very down day . . . Gracy was very tired today & took a good long nap! She loved playing with her balloons (I think we could have just given her balloons & she would have been happy!). She also rode her toddler tricycle up/down the driveway with each staff person taking turns helping her make it "go"! Yes, a splish/splash in the pool was mandatory after that! She fell asleep very early . . . Whew! Mama was tired too!

Thursday (6/9) - A very normal day of wait . . . but playing with the new b-day toys break up the day. After a good pool splish/splash, we had b-day cake, again, mid-afternoon (this time - we shared it with Giorgio, Italian NGO coordinator). Mama even stuck in her feet in the pool today (of course, I made sure my knees & elbows were covered! lol!)

Mama & Gracy have "adopted" a stray kitty born under the guard house. It is a yellow tabby. Gracy loves it & looks for it everyday. The kitten is very emaciated & we are "loving" it back to health (G'ma remember my childhood days with the barn kittens?). I've told Karim that he will need to take care of it when we are gone! He smiles & says he will try to make sure the kitten stays healthy. Now that we see the kitten gaining in health . . . we will give it a name . . . Hmmmmm . . . will let you know!

Gracy, of course, has some new words -

"Bir-day" - of course, a BIG word this week in honor of our bir-day girl!
"Balloon" - many, many balloons to pop & play with.

On the legal/USCIS/Immigrant Visa front - there is a lot of frustration & uncertainty on what will happen next. I wish I could tell you that the USCIS immigrant visa process is going smoothly, but it is not . . . Please pray for wisdom . . . the right people, the right steps taken, all within the right timing . . . all are very important. Without wisdom, we could hinder the case instead of help. The "bigger picture" is . . . Marina Grace's future! I'm a US citizen with a US passport . . . I can come back to the US, at any time. However, Marina Grace cannot at this point in time (even though I am her legal guardian) & the way we communicate & handle the case . . . will determine Gracy's future!

Yes, we are ready to come home! Pray for wisdom & God's omnipotent timing . . . hopefully good news soon.

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy (our b-day sweetie!!)

Hello, from Pakistan - USE Immigrant Visa

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 24 May 2011 00:27:00 +0000

So sorry for the month delay . . . going on 130 days, 18-5 weeks, 4+ months.

Since I have so much time to cover, I'll list only the significant days.

Tuesday (4/5) - I am trying to deal with the head lice without frustration & going crazy! :0 I try to go through Gracy's hair when she is asleep a couple times a day (nap & bedtime) & pick out the nits by hand (yes, I look at each strand!). Without her being asleep, it simply can't be done. She doesn't understand the concept of "sit still". But, the liquid solution, "Coppex", seems to be working. Each day I find fewer & fewer nits. I can tell you, I have a new appreciation for the term that "someone is being nit picking"! lol!

Wednesday (4/6) - This week we received the High Court signed/attested order.

Thursday (4/7) - Our Sweet Pea turns 22 months old!

Friday (4/8) - Visit with US immigration attorney about next steps & how best to use the HC order for USE. When we received the HC order, we noticed there were 3 misstatements that severely compromise MG's orphan status. So, I needed to discuss our next steps with my US immigration attorney to determine how best to proceed. The advice from my US immigration attorney is the HC order cannot be used with the misstatements of MG's orphan status. It is just too risky. So . . . .

Saturday (4/9) - Since the HC order will not be useable in it's present statements, I visited with my Pakistan attorney to discuss a plan of action on how best to make HC order corrections & still move forward with applying for the Certificate of Guardianship. In the end of all the Pakistan court hearings, what I really need is a Certificate of Guardianship. It is something similar to an adoption decree (IR-3 intercountry adoptions), but since this is an IR-4 adoption (guardianship, no adoption decree), it is the final document that states my rights as legal guardian. The certificate is what we are trying to be in the best possible position to apply for, the sooner the better, but . . . with a good case & authentic documents. My Pak attorney & I made the decision to make appeal applications in High Court to get the needed corrections for the best position for USE orphan status & at the same time, make another appeal application in Civil Court for the amendments we need to the initial 1/19/11 guardianship order to make the best case possible to apply for the Certificate of Guardianship.

Sunday (4/10) - No St Thomas Church today - Nit Picking all day!!!!

Tuesday (4/12) - We have had 2 additional court hearings to prepare for this week. We filed both today, Tuesday. The hearings should be scheduled for Wednesday (Civil) & Thursday (HC)

Wednesday (4/13) - Civil Court appeal hearing - Using the High Court ruling in favor the global definition of "adoption" outside of Islamic law (Shariah law), we are now able to file another appeal with the Civil Court to demand the words ". . . and adoption . . . " be dictated in the initial 1/19/11 guardianship order. Civil/District Court must use the precedent case law set by HC. In that same appeal to Civil Court, they reopened the District Court case & along with the Civil Court case - both ending in favorable rulings. Yes, the amendment was approved - YEAH! Finally!!! Now, with the amendment approval, the 1/19/11 guardianship order will now comply with US IR-4 adoption immigration law. And . . . I can now make application for the guardianship certificate (also required by USCIS). With a valid guardianship order per USCIS guidelines & guardianship certificate . . . the US Embassy side will go much quicker. We are in hopes to have all those documents by Friday AM. If it works as planned, I can go to the USE Friday afternoon to submit the IR-4 immigrant visa dossier. From that point, we "think" it should take 2-5 business days for Gracy's immigrant visa.

Thursday (4/14) - High Court appeal hearing #1 - Even though the High Court ruled in favor of our global definition of "adoption" to supersede Shariah law, the HC judge unfortunately dictated some specific facts about MG's custody timeline that are erroneous & severely damage her "orphan status" per USCIS guidelines. So, we need to appeal to the HC to have the 3-4 erroneous statements expunged/amended from the final HC order. This is in case the USE wants to read the HC ruling. We want to make sure that there is nothing dictated in error about the specific details of MG's orphan status. We found out Wednesday, the HC judge for our case is currently on leave & should be back to his bench on Monday. Today, we tried to expedite the hearing with another HC judge, but unfortunately, the HC has ruled that our appeal for an amended/expunged order can only be heard by the presiding HC judge. So, we are continued until next week. We will see on Monday . . . if the judge is back from leave.

Since we have a judge's amendment decision on the guardianship order, we also applied for the Certificate of Guardianship in the lower Civil Court. This requires a surety bond to be paid to the Pakistani courts. I received the wire transfer from my bank on Tuesday & we are ready to FINALLY get the precious certificate. It should take ~ 1 day to dictate, sign & attest. Crossing my fingers for tomorrow's good news!!!

Friday (4/15) - CERTIFICATE OF GUARDIANSHIP was received, along with the AMENDED initial 1/19/11 Guardianship Order!!! We have waited for 3.5 months for these 2 documents!!! Unfortunately, they didn't get attested until late afternoon so I was not able to meet the 1:00 p.m. adoption appointment at the USE to submit the immigrant visa dossier's I-600 form for an IR-4 immigrant visa. I'm planning on going Monday. But . . . we had very, very good news today!

Saturday (4/16) - More nit picking & a good time splish/splashing in the pink washing tub out on the terrace! Gracy loves to do this! It is really starting to get very hot . . . high 90's, sometimes 100. I'm told within a few weeks the "hot" will be felt. Karim (guest house owner) has turned on the a/c in my room since we face west & the hot, hot sun bares down on the 2 large windows in our room & we are on the 2nd floor (heat rises!). In the afternoon between 2-5 p.m. it is almost unbearable in our room, even with 3 fans going!

Sunday (4/17) - No St Thomas Church - It looks like we are finally over our head lice, but I treated our hair again with the Coopex solution for a 2nd time. Hopefully, now we are lice free!

Monday (4/18) - We finally took that all-important trip to the USE to submit our immigrant visa dossier!!! Security is very, very tight & you cannot enter into the Diplomatic Enclave Section (section of high security where 90% of all embassies are located, along with embassy housing for employees) unless authorized to do so. So, you have to go to a Diplomatic Shuttle Service to be thoroughly searched (all electronic devices have to be checked). Once there, you buy a shuttle ticket & the shuttle routes through the Diplomatic Enclave Section to the different embassies for everyone on the shuttle. It was a very hot ride, but we made it to the USE embassy in about 15 minutes (not bad in the heat! no a/c). Once at the embassy, you have to go through 2 additional levels of security (outside & inside). Outside, you show your passport (and appointment letter, if you have) & then they scan you with a hand held security scanner & they physically pat you down (women behind a closed door) & search you & any other items you bring (documents, diaper bag, etc). I have been there enough time to know what I can bring inside in the diaper bag & what I cannot, so I take only what I need for Gracy (no toys are allowed & only diapers & bottles for babies). Then, you enter the USE & you have another body scanner & baggage scanner to go through. The guards then call to verify your appointment with the USE officials. The guards write a green approval form for you to take with you to hand to the interior security guards that patrol the inner sanctum of the USE where the officials & interview windows are located.

However, when the security guard called the USE officials (American Citizens Services Unit), they would only allow me to enter with a valid "ISL" National Visa Center (NVC) case #. I told them that I didn't have an ISL number, I had a MOS number. If you remember from my blog, back in 2009, I had the same issue. When I did a country change from Russia to Pakistan, my NVC case number was never changed from Moscow USE number. During 2009, they just used the MOS number because it was still a unique number & would give them my electronic file they needed . . . so it was never changed. Now, this was really creating problems with the USACSU (USE American Citizens Services unit)! They would not let me through the locked door into the outer lobby unless I could produce an ISL number. Well, I couldn't . . . I looked at my I-171H (I-600A approval) & my NBC # was not even listed on the new I171-H extension. The NBC Center that approved my latest updated I-171H (only good for 18 months, which I updated in Dec 2010 & rec'd the hard copy right before we left in Jan 2011.) failed to fill out the NVC case number. I never noticed it in Jan when I rec'd because the NBC in Lee's Summit, MO had just taken over the approvals of I-600A approvals (I-171H form) mid year 2010 & the form had a totally new format! So, I couldn't even give them the unique NVC case number that was used in 2009. So, I asked them to pull my NVC case by my petitioner name, which I have had the NVC do many, many times. But . . . the USE official would not do that because it was not in the USE protocol to do so. Without the unique number, I couldn't get in! Very frustrating to be a US citizen, within 50 feet of the ACSU & infamous "window #1" & not be allowed to enter. So . . . unfortunately we had to leave (but I did get a name & number to call once back at the guest house). The ride back to the Diplomatic Shuttle service was so Hot & Disappointing!

Once I was back at the guest house, I called the USACSU & talked with the immigration official. She confirmed that they will not pull a petitioner's NVC file by name, it has to be by case #. She did say that the "MOS" case # would be fine since it is still a unique key to my electronic file. So, later that night (US morning), I called my immigration attorney & had her begin calling the USCIS/NBC center & NVC to find out why the case number was not listed on my I-600A approval/I-171H form.

Tuesday (4/19) - I rec'd an email during the night from my attorney with my "MOS" case number. No one knows why it was left off of the I-600A approval/I-171H form . . . so we move on! My US attorney also emailed the number to the USACSU/Immigrant Visa section in hopes that I could get an interview appointment on Tuesday at 1:00 p.m. (daily adoption time slot). The 1:00-2:00 time slot is the only time the USE will make an appointment for IR-4 adoption interviews & you can only call that section of the USE during the hours of 12:30 - 1:30 daily. It makes it very limiting to try to resolve any issues that arise (which we had many during this week!).

I rec'd a call at 1:00 p.m. from the USE ACSU/Immigrant Visa Section & was told they had pulled my electronic file by the "MOS" number, but it was not the current, updated I-600A approval/I-171H form that I had processed in Dec 2010 & rec'd a hard copy on the 1st of Jan 2011 (right before we left). USE was telling me that they could not process my I-600 form for the IR-4 adoption immigrant visa. They then told me they would have to send my file to the USE in New Delhi, India for further instructions on how to proceed. I asked them to please not send my file the ND, give me 24 hours & I would get the electronic file straightened out. I had the current, hard copy I-171H form with a valid expiration date (7/2012) in my hands, but the USE would not accept the paper form. It had to come directly from the USCIS/NBC through the NVC to the USE/Islamabad. Yes, I was experiencing the 2009 electronic file nightmare all over again!!!

While I was dealing with the NVC/USE electronic file, my Pakistan attorneys had the HC hearing #2 for the HC order amendment/expunge appeal. The HC judge was back from leave. However, due to some HC pressing matters at the gov't level, the judge had not had time to review the appeal & continue the case to Thursday (4/21). Today, in fact, this week was a very, very busy week with much phone calling & crisis management! ;)

Wednesday (4/20) - Again, dealing with the NVC/USE electronic file issue . . . it goes from bad to worse! My US attorney called the USCIS/NBC last night & verified that, once again, they did have record of my I-600A/I-171H extension dated with an expiration date of 7/2012. So all is good on the USCIS side. She also verified that the NVC had rec'd the updated extension from the NBC on 12/12/2010. So, once again, my US attorney asked (for the 2nd time) for the NBC to resend the file to the NVC & then had the NVC resend to the USE. I checked the USE early am to see if they could pull up my electronic file & see the updated documents for my I-171H extension. Again, they told me the expiration date was 1/11/2011. I explained that the electronic file was resent from the NVC with verification that the NBC had sent the correct, updated I-171H dated 7/12/2012. I was so confused & yes, irritated that my own gov't agencies simply couldn't talk to each other to resolve a simple upload issue. It was all my responsibility to make sure that the electronic file was where it needed to be! I gladly take it on . . . but I don't have complete authority to make it all happen!

So, I called my US attorney in the evening & shared the news that the electronic file was still not correct. She got on the phone & called again! And, I also got on the phone with the USCIS/NBC & NVC. Amazingly, the NVC did not have my NBC number on my electronic file (I-171H SIM number) & the NBC doesn't keep the NVC case # attached to the file, so what do you think they had to do to find my electronic file . . . . they pulled my file by my petitioner's name!!! Something the USE would simply not do! Anyway . . . I again verified that the current I-171H was the correct extension with an expiration date of 7/12/2012 & the USCIS/NBC had record that it was sent to the NVC on 12/15/2010. Then both my attorney & I called the NVC. Again, they were initially confused about the "MOS" vs "ISL" case number, so I asked them to pull my file by petitioner's name (amazing how that does work!). They told me their records show that they had sent the same electronic file rec'd on 12/16/2011 from the NBC to the USE/Islamabad on 12/17/2010. They said there should be no reason why the USE could not pull my current 7/12/2012 dated I-600A/I-171H approval. So, I had the NVC go directly to the actual transmission & pull up the actual electronic docs sent in the transmission. I found out they scan the docs & send through a secure sever site. They read directly from the scanned docs & on page 4 of the transmission, was my 7/12/2012 I-600A approval! I asked if the NVC would copy me on the transmission of the electronic file, but it is against security protocol to send the electronic file to a petitioner (I understand that, probably not a good idea, since docs can be changed easily). Back in 2009, the manager of the USACSU was awesome & he actually took it upon himself to find my electronic file. Since it had a unchanged "MOS" number, it was sent to Moscow instead of Pakistan, he found it & got it all straightened out for me. But, he is no longer at the USE . . . transferred out after 12 months. So, I am stuck . . . with another electronic file issue.

Thursday (4/21) - HC hearing #3. I attended this time, 8:30 a.m. Our case docket number to be heard was #5, so we were up very quickly. My Pak attorneys very carefully asked for the amendment to the HC order (some judges get offended if you ask them to change their dictation). But, this HC judge seemed to understand the criticalness of the USCIS orphan status guidelines. However, he still had not reviewed our appeal due to time constraints of other gov't priorities. It was continued until next Tuesday (4/26). But, he did make a light remark that "If I could give you the immigrant visa straight away . . . I would!" Then he said, "A child will have a loving home who otherwise would not. There is nothing but good coming from this US immigration case." I felt a tear roll down my face. Finally, after 4 months, understanding from a Pakistani judge!

I'm still dealing with the USE on the electronic file issue. One the way to the HC hearing (30 minute taxi drive) I was able to call the USACSU/Immigration section & discuss my electronic file for the 4th day. I walked through the process both my attorney & I had gone through last night with phone calls to both USCIS/NBC & the NVC. I finally told the official that I had done everything possible, as the petitioner, except come into the USE & try to pull the electronic file myself. But, since they would not let me in without a current electronic file . . . my hands were tied. There was absolutely no reason the current I-600A/I-171H approval should not be in my electronic file at the USE. I gave her the name & number of the NVC & I "strongly" pressed her that it was time for the USE to take an active role in calling another US gov't agency to get it resolved.

At 12:00, I had a call from the USE asking me to come in at 1:00 p.m. for the initial I-600 & I-600A/I-171H interview submission! Needless, to say, I grabbed Gracy & we were on our way to the shuttle service & at the USE by 1:00 p.m.! I finally made it past the "locked" outer lobby hall door. I had my blue approval form to allow me into the inner USACSU/Immigration section.

As I walked through the hall of the outer USE lobby, strong emotions came flooding back from 2009. If you remember from my blog I mentioned several times about "window #1". I knew as I walked through the locked, grey inner door, that specific private window would be the first thing I saw. My heart actually ached as I remembered . . . all the pain! As I walked the 50 feet, I kept my eyes on Gracy. Then about 10 feet away, I looked to my left & saw down the side hall the 1st room on the right, Room 101, where I sat in front of FIA being questioned about my involvement in child trafficking. That was the same room I sat in front of Sadeem Shargeel, a broken, grief stricken parent asking him "how" & "why"? I felt the emotion of it all over again . . . and I quickly prayed, as I reached the inner USACSU grey door, now unlocked by the security guard manning the door, "Lord, please let the step through this door be my healing step . . . " ,The security guard opened the door for me. I opened my eyes & yes, right in front of me was "window #1". I already knew the process & took a seat in the inner USACSU lobby, waiting for my name to be called. The blessing was . . . Gracy had no memory of 2009 & she was a happy, busy little toddler, keeping me busy & entertained during the 15 minute wait.

Finally, my name was called & I took that final step into "window #1". It looked exactly the same . . . 2 white chairs . . . glass window . . . shelf where I changed Sweet Pea's last diaper before she was taken from my arms . . . everything was the same. A lump caught in my throat, but my mind had to snap back quickly to reality, as I was immediately being introduced to the official & asked to sit down. Then it started . . . all over again . . . the official asked for my dossier. She took out the 2 documents that begin it all . . . the I-600 & I-600A/I-171H approval. So, we are finally here, again . . . please pray for me during this USE process for my heart's healing.

It took only about 15 minutes to submit the documents. Then I was asked to go back out to the USACSU waiting area. After another 15 minutes, I was called back to "window #1", where 2 gentlemen where sitting behind the glass window (1 man I remember from 2009, the other was the successor of the previous Mgr of Fraud Prevention). They asked me to sit down. The man I remembered smiled at me & asked me how I was doing (I remember that he also was very kind during that horrific day). Then the in-depth interview began . . . I was questioned for over 3 hours. We went through everything, every detail was covered . . . from my very 1st decision to adopt internationally. They questioned me about Nicholas' adoption in 2004 to the current day . . . Once we got to 2009/2010 details, it was difficult & emotionally I broke. They gave me a few minutes break, understanding how difficult it was. The Mgr of Fraud Prevention was finally understanding the magnitude of what happened . . . and he expressed how sorry he was that I had to endure that trauma for so long. He told me he would do everything he could to create a successful outcome this time . . . depending, of course, on the facts of the case & authenticity of documents. After, the questioning was over . . . there was a peaceful relief that came over me. I had made it through the long interview. During the 3+ hours, Gracy bounced back & forth between the 3 patrolling USACSU lobby security guards & me in "window #1" (The lock on the private window door didn't work!) But, when we finally finished with the lengthy interview, my Gracy Girl was sitting on mama's lap & I bent down to gave her a big kiss & hug. She is so worth it!

The man with the Mgr of Fraud Prevention that sat in on the questioning because he was present during the 2009 case, explained that the b.parents did not initially have any appropriate documentation that proved they were the b.parents of MG. I was told that, as the petitioner/applicant, it was my responsibility to provide the best possible evidence to substantiate paternity. The best option is a DNA test. So, I left with instructions on how to order & have the DNA test kit sent from the US (the USE will only accept a DNA test kit & report results from an authorized US lab). So, I would be busy over the next few days trying to decide on the lab & order the test kit.

At 4:30 p.m. I was finished & walked back out of the grey, inner USACSU door. Back down the inner lobby hall to the security station. I sat just outside the security station waiting for the shuttle to return. As I was waiting, a security guard (I had remembered him from 2009) came into the lobby. He sat down beside me & asked, "Are you the same weeping woman that was here in 2009 adopting a Pakistani baby child? You left weeping and so broken hearted because the baby was taken from you . . ." I looked at him through tears & said "Yes, I am that woman". He then asked "Is this the same child?". I said "Yes". He looked at me & said "Can I shake your hand for being so wonderful to not forget her & come back for this orphan." My heart broke again. Then he looked through the security station window, nodded his head & several of the other Pakistani security guards that remembered that horrific day came into the lobby. Each one shook my hand & told me I was such a wonderful, caring person to come back for 1 Pakistani orphan child. That was when my healing became real for me. It wasn't taking the steps through any door, but through the understanding of the Pakistani security guards that totally understood the journey of this adoption. I left with a smile & thanksgiving in my heart . . .

Thursday evening, I began the research of DNA test labs in the US, trying to determine which lab would have the best timeline for efficient processing of a DNA test. I worked on this over the next day so I could have a lab decision to order the test kit from on Monday evening.

Saturday (4/23 ) - A major Laundry Day!!! It takes over 4 hours to do laundry by hand . . . I have been so busy, it became a low priority. Now, I am paying for it! A very, very hot, manual job!

Sunday (4/24) - Easter Sunday. I was very sad when I skyped with my Nicky early morning. I was so looking forward to being home by Easter! But . . . that wasn't possible. I felt like I had missed out on so much of my little boy's life/activities (spring musical, spring soccer season, Valentine's Day, Easter & our family egg hunt, etc.) And, I now know I will also miss Mother's Day & Nicky's spring piano recital. I have such an awesome little boy. He looked sad too, but told me "Mama, it's ok, Uppa D & Grandma are here. Just come home soon!" I know I am where I am supposed to be & our situation is only for this season, a temp time of separation in our entire family's life. MG is so little right now & I need to be here . . . with her. I am where I need to be! So, we enjoyed the day as best we could!

It was a beautiful, sunny Easter morning, about 95 degrees. The English service (9:00 a.m.) at St Thomas was wonderful! I had on a new Shalwar Kameez & Gracy had on a new cotton dress & sandals. The front alter of the church was beautifully decorated in lovely flowers. I was told that in the 11:00 Urdu service, they expected over 1,500. Since the sanctuary will not hold that many, they turn the courtyard into a sanctuary with a huge tent, chairs & alter (also decorated beautifully). We thoroughly enjoyed the service & friends at St Thomas! Once we were back home, I had planned on a quiet day of napping. But, the guest house owner had other plans! He showed up at our room door with Easter gifts! He knew I would be a little blue today & he did his very best to make the day a special day in Pakistan for us. We had a special Easter cake. MG received a chocolate egg filled with candies & a beautiful new dress (he wanted to get it to me earlier so she could wear it to Easter service, but he didn't realize the English service started at 9:00 a.m. instead of the regular 11:00 a.m.). It was special anyway. He also gave mama a special gift as well of a new purse. He had noticed that the latch on the one that I was carrying had broken, he was so thoughtful. We had tea in the afternoon with Karim & his son (Sameer) & had our special Easter cake. It was wonderful! Such a special family!

Monday (4/25) - In the evening I ordered the DNA test kit from the US. I decided to use a lab from Oklahoma City that had a very good processing timeline (4 days) once they received the DNA samples back. Of course, the kit has to be sent via FedEx & this takes 3-4 days both ways. So, this process will take about 2 weeks to complete. (I don't think we will have the immigrant visa in 2-5 days an initially anticipated!). I also contacted the b.parents through the Christian organization that has been helping, to let them know they would need to decide if they were still willing to take the DNA test. I had been told before the USE side was started, if a DNA test was needed, they were willing to travel to Islamabad for this process. So, we will see if the DNA test kit arrives by the end of the week.

Tuesday (4/26) - The HC hearing #4. Again, I met the Pakistan attorneys at 8:30 a.m. at High Court. We again had a very low hearing number for the day, #3. So, it didn't take very long. Once our case was called, the judge quickly heard the arguments & produced a draft order for our review. I was so shocked! This is not the normal process in the Pakistani courts. Normally, the attorney does not get a draft copy of the order prior to the judge's signature/attestation. But, this HC judge understood & wanted it to be exactly the way we needed it, to be in the best position with the USE. So, my Pakistan attorney & I took a break outside & reviewed the draft order. We made the necessary corrections & had the secretary re-draft for a final order dictation. Amazing . . . ! The judge told us he would not change a single word!

Wednesday (4/27) - Via email I found out the DNA kit was sent via FedEx today from OKC, USA. Expected arrival day is Friday or Monday. We also took a walk today to visit our park family friends. The temp is also climbing rapidly . . . getting closer to 100+ every day!

Saturday (4/30) - During all of this HC, USE processing . . . My Pakistan visa also needs attention. Shalena (guest house daughter, works for NGO) & I went to the Ministry of Interior (MOI) at 10:30 for a visa extension appointment. My visa will expire on 5/3, so we MUST have a MOI approval prior to that expiration day. Shalena works her magic once again! I praise God for this wonderful young lady. Without her expertise, I would not have been able to remain in Pakistan as long as I have. She is truly God given. In fact, the entire guest house family have been God given. I now know why there is the word "Grace" in the name of the guest house (New Cape Grace Guest House). That word, "Grace", has been my beacon light to guide me to the resources needed. God has totally been in control!

Monday (5/2) - DNA Test Kit has arrived!!! Through the FedEx tracking number, I went online & found out the DNA test kit had been delivered. Waiting for the USE to call with the DNA test appointment. I'm told I should not call the USE daily for status updates . . . it irritates them! Ok, I'll try to be patient :)

Shelina checks on the status of my Pakistan visa approval from the MOI. Still waiting . . . I need it very soon so I don't incur overstay charges!

Gracy is going splish/splash in her pink tub as often as she can. With all her splashing, this keeps both of us cool during the hot Islamabad afternoons!

We all know what happened on this day in history . . . Osama bin Laden is captured/killed in Abbatabad, Pakistan. This is a short distance from Islamabad, about 60 KM (an hour's drive). Of course, my family is very concerned about my wellfare (& so am I!). It would be great if we could leave Pakistan immediately, however, there are certain protocol policies that must be maintained for US immigration applications. We contacted Senator Inhofe's office & they are monitoring the situation on a daily basis.

But, I'm in my little bubble here at the guest house. My surroundings are very quiet & peaceful. Many Pakistani people are quietly rejoicing . . . Even though 9/11 is what people remember with 3,000 deaths . . . we must also remember that this man has killed more of his own country's people than any other country's terrorist attack. Over 30,000+ Pakistans have been murdered. It isn't the Muslim people that are the enemy, just like the people in America are not the enemy . . . it is the evil that lies in a specific man's heart that makes his own agenda based on the twisting of good & righteous religious teachings. So much unnecessary Muslim-bashing that comes from other countries' uneducated people.

Tuesday (5/3) - USACSU/Immigration Sector still hasn't received the DNA test kit in their office (it takes several days to process through the mail room!). However, I received a call late in the afternoon, asking if the b.parents can travel the next day, Wednesday (less than a 16 hour notice), for a "tentative" 3:00 p.m. appointment. I found out the USE does DNA testing only on Wed afternoons & if it couldn't be done tomorrow . . . we would have to wait another week! So, I immediately started trying to get in touch with the b.parents. Finally, at 11:00 p.m. I receive a text that the b.parents can travel the next day (big sigh of relief). However, I will not know if the DNA test kit is rec'd in the USACSU/Immigration section with confirmation of the appointment, until 1st thing Wednesday morning.

My Pakistan visa extension expires today!

Wednesday (5/4) - My 4th Pakistan visa extension is finally approved. Shalena worked her magic once again & got it back dated to 5/3 (my visa expiration date) so I will not incur any overstay charges. She came by the guest house to give me the hard copy approval. Wonderful, wonderful Shelina!

Early in the morning I receive a call from the USE that told me the DNA test appointment is official. I call the Christian pastor that will accompany the b.parents & notify him to go ahead & purchase the bus tickets for travel. The b.parents are expected to arrive at 2:00 p.m. for the 3:00 p.m. appointment. That doesn't give us much grace time, but it is the best we can do. Fingers crossed that the b.parents make it on time. Sameer, Gracy & I leave for the USE DNA test appointment & we arrive at the Diplomatic Shuttle Services at a little before 3:00 p.m. As we were driving through the shuttle services security, we received a phone call . . . . the b.parents bus had a flat tire & it had to be fixed before they could continue on their trip to Islamabad. The delay from 3:00 would be 1.5 hours before they arrived! That would be at 4:30 p.m. I called the USACSU/Immigrant section & shared the unfortunate news & asked if the DNA technician could possible stay after hours, USE said they would check. Sameer & I waited for the b.parents & Pastor for almost 2 hours. I called the USACSU/Immigration Section every few minutes to try to talk with the individuals that were in charge of my case, but they were not available. Somehow the message got twisted & the receptionist relayed a message that the b.parents had a bus breakdown & would not be coming today. Logistically, getting from the rural areas of Pakistan to urban cities, is very difficult; dirt roads, old & crowded buses. Add on to that a breakdown & it is highly unlikely that any kind of preplanned travel schedule can be maintained. So, unknown to me, the appointment was cancelled! At 4:30 p.m. I finally was able to visit with 1 of my case officials. She told me that the DNA technication had already left for the day & would not be available for 2 weeks. I thought I was going to cry! I asked her if there was anything, anything that could be done . . . she told me she would call me back in 5 minutes. Thankfully, she called the DNA technician & he had an available appointment on Friday afternoon at 2:00 p.m. & the USE was willing to set aside policy for this special DNA appointment (thank you to Sen. Inhofe's office & many US individuals calls to his office). Now, we just had to wait for the b.parents to arrive & see if they could stay over through Friday evening.

The b.parents arrived at 5:00 & we gave the unfortunate news to them that the DNA test could not be done today. Through Sameer as translator in Urdu to the Pastor who translated to Punjabi, I visited with the b.parents & explained the situation of Friday's appointment. They told me they would discuss it while traveling back to the guest house. Once we all arrived back at the guest house, Karim had a snack & tea ready for everyone. The b.parents interacted/played with Gracy for about 2.5 hours. I know it had to be bittersweet for them. But they mentioned over & over that MG looked so healthy & happy!

The b.parents made the decision to stay for Friday's DNA test (sigh of relief!). Then, Karim went into action (doing what he does best, making people feel comfortable & well taken care of) . . . he took care of everything for their stay, booked them in a near by guest house, arranged for their meals & taxi.

Thursday (5/5) - Sameer & I go to the Passport/Visa Center to submit my visa extension approval & passport. The Pakistan Visa Center holds the US passport for 7 days to authenticate the approval & stamp the passport with the extension date. When we arrived, we found out the visa center was closed due to visa fraud. Their were military guarding the barred door of the visa center. We were told the visa center would be closed until Monday. We had no choice but to go back to the guest house. As we were driving back in the taxi, Sameer called Shalena & Shalena called her contacts. Since my Pakistan visa had expired on 5/3, I was worried about overstay charges. According to Shalena/Sameer, I would not be charged overstay fees since my MOI approval was back dated to 5/3.

Friday (5/6) - We all met, once again, at the Diplomatic shuttle services & traveled by shuttle together for the DNA appointment at 2:00 p.m. As a US citizen, I had to accompany them into the USE. And . . . for the DNA test kit to be opened, all parties had to be present.

Then another unfortunate vehicle breakdown occurred for the DNA technician. We waited for over an hour . . . Finally, I asked if the b.parent interview could begin while waiting. Instead, they wanted to interview me & asked me to sit inside "window #1" for some additional questioning. So, for another 30 minutes I was questioned (so, now I have been interviewed/questioned for 4 hours total). The DNA technician arrived & FINALLY the DNA test kit (that had traveled many thousands of miles in a few days) was opened. Gracy was 1st . . . 2 swabs inside the mouth, 1 on each side. She was surprised with the right side & it wasn't difficult at all. Then she knew what was coming on the left, lol! . . . . she was not going to have anything to do with another big ole, cotton swab stuck in her mouth again. So, mama had to hold her while the technician finished the DNA swabbing. Then, appropriately, Gracy & Mama left & returned back to the guest house. Earlier that day, I had taken a thumb drive with pictures to the photo studio to have printed. I got a pretty pink, very baby/girlie, picture album & made a sweet photo journey album for the b.parents as a gift from Gracy. I wrote a loving note (from Gracy) on the inside cover (of course, in English! lol!).

The b.parents' interview lasted for 2.5 hours. I was surprised the USE stayed open past the 4:30 p.m. closing to finish interviewing the b.parents. Sameer waited for the b.parents at the shuttle services to accompany them back to their lodging should they want to stay another night. But, they decided to travel back to their home Friday night. They stopped at the guest house long enough to say good-bye to Gracy & we took some final pictures. I gave them the photo album . . . they were very touched to have the sweet pictures of their daughter. Then Sameer took them back to the bus station to travel back to their home.

This was a b.parent experience that I will cherish & remember all my life.

Saturday (5/7) - Gracy turns 23 months old!

Sunday (5/8) - Mother's Day! - I skyped early AM with Nicky & opened his Mother's Day gift to me. On Friday, after I came back from the DNA test, Karim handed me a large red, tin from Narala (our favorite sweet shop). I hadn't visited the sweet shop since Uppa D left. What a wonderful treat from my little guy!!! He told me he & Uppa D had gone online & looked at every single combination of sweets. He picked this one out "specially for you Mama". I love my Nicky so!!! Later, we went to church at St Thomas. Gracy joined the children in a special Mother's Day celebration! All the children were taken to the front alter & handed red tea roses to take to their Mother. Of course Gracy didn't really understand what it was all about, but where I was sitting was pointed out to her. She gave me a big smile, as I held out my arms to her. I'll never forget this part . . . As she was walking to me, she started pulling the petals off the rose & dropping them on the aisle floor. By the time she got to me, with the biggest smile she had . . . she held up the stem to me! It was just the most darling thing. Everyone in the congregation got a kick out of watching her. It was just so sweet . . . she is just pure joy!

So, I spent Gracy's 1st Mother's Day with just her . . . the 2 girls. We played "babies" in the afternoon. Taking hats & clothes off . . . & then putting them on all over again. Rocking our babies & kissing their head, wrapping them in blankets & putting them to "night-night". Ahhhhh, just so special. We also watched "The Little Mermaid" on TV. But, Gracy's attention span is not quite that long yet . . . so we went splish/splash in the pink pool.

All-in-all . . . a wonderful Mother's Day in Islamabad, Pakistan!!!

Monday (5/9) - The DNA test kit was sent back to the US via FedEx today. The expected arrival date is Friday 5/13.

Sameer & I go, once again, to the Pakistan Visa Center to try to turn in my MOI extension approval & Passport. The visa center is still closed, with military guarding the doors.

We are also waiting on the final dictated/signed/attested HC order. We still have not received this important finishing touch to the Pakistani side of the legal process. My Pak attorney assures me that it will be finalized this week.

Tuesday (5/10) - Shalena calls Sameer & tells him that the Visa Center is supposedly now open. so, we travel, again, to the visa center. Once we are there . . . you can't believe the long line! People pushing & shoving to get their place in line. What a mess. They were letting in 1-2 people at a time, so we had to wait for an hour (in the hot sun) to get up to the door! Once inside, we waited another 30 minutes to finally hand in the MOI extension approval & passport. Since they keep your passport for 7 days, you receive a receipt that you carry with you in place of your passport. I will be able to pick up my passport with the stamped extension page next Tuesday, 17th.

Thursday (5/12) - I have been keeping my eye on the DNA test FedEx shipment through a tracking number. I called today to make sure the US lab was aware it was to arrive on Friday. But, I was told the shipment was laying on the manager's desk as we spoke. I was so elated! The lab manager told me that it "might" be possible to complete the report by Monday, but no guarantees. I asked to have a scanned copy of the report emailed to me. I estimated a next Wednesday arrival in Islamabad, with a Friday arrival at the USACSU Sector.

I received an email for the USE asking for my complete Prospective Adoptive Parent (PAP) dossier that was submitted as evidence for the guardianship hearing. I begin going through my legal file . . . . pulling out all the documents!

Friday (5/13) - When I checked my emails Friday evening, there was the electronic DNA report!!! The OKC lab processed the DNA test within 24 hours! (Good ole Oklahoma!) Both paternal & maternal tests were 99.9999% that the b.parents could not be eliminated as the biological parents. The hard copy report was also sent back via FedEx on Friday, back to the USE/Islamabad with an ETA of 5/18.

I had called one of my Pak attorneys to see if he could stop by the guest house to help in locating all the documents in my legal file the USE needed (it is a very thick file!). Mr. Raza was more than happy to come by & help. He made me a checklist of all the documents & we went through them 1 by 1 & made sure that everything was accounted for.

Mr. Raza also told me that they had received the HC signed/attested order & it was exactly as we had revised. The Pakistani Court side is now completely finished! In total, I believe we had 18 court hearings (I think I attended 9-10 of them).

The incredible blessing in all of this is . . . Our adoption case is the very 1st case heard in upper court (High Court & Supreme Court). The favorable HC ruling is a precedent setting case in favor of a "global" definition of adoption to supersede Shariah law in favor of the best interests of the orphan child, in such specific cases of intercountry adoption & non-Muslim adoption. Islamic Shariah law considers blood lines to be permanent & adoption (creating a non-bio parent/child relationship) to be illegal. In cases of non-Muslim guardianship/adoption (which, up to this point, have been extremely rare in Pak), there has never been a statute defined in the history of Pakistan, so Shariah law has ruled in those cases as well (20% of the population of Pak are non-Muslim). So, our sweet MG's case, for the very 1st time . . . allows a statute for future non-Muslim adoption within the country of Pakistan & makes future intercountry adoption much easier since the word "adoption" is now defined globally outside of Shariah law. Any country that has specific IR-4 adoption immigration visa requirements that need to be specifically stated in the guardianship order, will now fall outside of Shariah law & be considered in the best interests of the orphan child & dictated in the guardianship order per the particular country's immigration requirements. Shariah law no longer supersedes for domestic adoption of non-Muslim children or for foreign/intercountry adoptions that need to comply with the country's specific immigration law.

My prayer is hopefully, more non-Muslim orphan children will be adopted domestically & also ALL Pakistan orphan children can be considered for adoption internationally through this High Court precedent ruling order. I'm very proud of what has been accomplished here in Pakistan for "adoption" within the country & intercountry adoption. Who knew what God had in store? And . . . all because of the deep, deep abiding love of an orphan baby girl, our Sweet Pea . . . Marina Grace (of course, at her age, she has no clue what her case has accomplished). The entire story is a Divine Miracle!

I know I have said this before . . . but the Pakistani law firm I have used has been outstanding. They have taken on this case with ethical, heartfelt determination. Many times they have told me "This is not just your case . . . but our case as well. Gracy is our child, too & this case helps bring focus to many Pakistani orphan children." I have a special place in my heart for the attorneys that worked so diligently & all the firm's efforts that went into Gracy's case. And . . . they have told me they want progress reports & pictures of Gracy as she grows! There are no appropriate words to convey the heartfelt thank you that these attorneys deserve.

So, once Mr. Raza left, I had my "stack" of documents to take to the copy vendor before Monday AM. The USE will accept the documents between 8:30 - 12:00 Monday morning.

Saturday/Sunday (5/14-5/15) - All I can say is . . . . it is so HOT here! The temperature has finally reached 49 degrees C (110 degrees F). Everyone is agreeing that the "Hot" has arrived. Everyone is telling me to enjoy it because it will get worse in July-August. June is the hottest month in temperature with daily temps between 47-50+ C (105-112+ F). That is hot, my friends . . . but not too much humidity (thank goodness). In July, the monsoon season starts & even though the temp drops a few degrees, the humidity is so high that the heat index climbs to 52 C/115 F & lasts through August.

Gracy & I actually did not splish/splash this weekend . . . it was just too hot on the terrace! We are blessed with an a/c now & we are using it!!!

Monday (5/16) - I tried to get to the USE very early during the cool (95 F! lol!) of the morning . . . but the copy vendor had a broken machine, so we had to go to a different copy vendor. It was 10:00 (opens at 9:00) before I finally had all the documents copied. It was a very HOT drive to the Diplomatic Shuttle Service (109 F). But, we finally made it to the USE. I waited with the friendly security guards until I could get approval to enter the USACSU/Immigration section. Once we were there, we waited for about 10 minutes to be called to the window. It took 5 minutes to walk through the documents with the official (thank you Mr. Raza for the document check list!). I asked about the status of the case . . . still working on it, still in progress. I also gave her the FedEx tracking number for the DNA report & made sure they were aware of the ETA.

She told me the DNA report would probably be in the USACSU by the end of the week, if it arrived in the USE mail room by Wednesday. She told me regardless, she would call me on Friday (5/20) with a status update.

So, everything I can possible do for the USE IR-4 immigrant visa process has been done. It is just a matter of the final decision! Praying for a favorable outcome & that precious envelope with the immigrant visa stapled to the front, in my hand very soon!

Tuesday (5/17) - Sameer & I travel to the Pakistan Visa Center to pick up my passport with the new extension stamp. The pickup time for passports is only 45 minutes (2:00 - 2:45 p.m.). So, you have to make sure you are there at 2:00 right when they open or you may still be standing in line when they close. Once again, through all the stacks of files, my passport is ready! A 4th visa extension & I'm running out of pages in my passport! lol!

Wednesday (5/18) - Pastor Nadeem (St Thomas Church) came to visit in the afternoon for a couple of hours.

The next few days - Waiting . . . Waiting . . . Waiting - Hot . . . Hot . . . Hot!

Friday (5/20) - USE computers are down for the day. All appointments have been rescheduled for Monday. I didn't receive a call from the USE today giving a status. However, I have been looking at flights schedules to be ready to book the return flight as soon as I get the green light. I am so anxious & ready to come home. I can't wait to hold my Nicholas . . . . it has been almost 5 months since I tucked him in bed, tousled his hair & kissed his sweet head. I know he has grown a foot & I don't want to miss any more time with him!!!

In the early evening (6:00ish) Karim took Gracy & I to the Islamabad zoo! She loved it. There was also a small amusement park that had a few kiddie rides. She rode the pony & wagon several times. She also rode the cutest baby elephant ride. But the activity she enjoyed the most . . . jumping on the trampoline! Karim has become Papa Karim to Gracy & I can tell you, Karim loves it when she says "Papa". I took the stroller, but Karim would have nothing to do with it . . . he carried Gracy the entire time. There is definitely a strong bond between Papa Karim & his "little Shalena"! He keeps telling me how much he is going to miss us when we leave. I think he wanted to make sure he got his Papa "fix", since we may be leaving sometime very soon.

Another very, very hot weekend. It was supposed to rain on Sunday night, but didn't. Anxiously awaiting for Monday . . . and a hopeful, positive status update from the USE!!!

So . . . That brings us up to date . . . :)

Gracy has some new words -

"Flower" - during Mar/Apr (spring time) the flowers of Islamabad are just beautiful!
"Papa" - for Papa Karim. Gracy is Karim's "little Shalena"!
"Owie Owie" - for our little bumps/bruises
"Nose" - learning the parts of the body
"Kitty" - there is a cat that we see on our walks
"No" - comes through loud & clear!
"Juice" - apple is the favorite
"Cookie" - every snack is a cookie (very cute, how she says it)
"Nee Mee" - Nicky

We read books everyday & Gracy's speech compehension is really coming along. She understands a lot of what I say in English &, of coursse, she understands Urdu fluently. Of course, her verbal speech (English or Urdu) is not as good, but new English words are coming everyday. And she can babble a story like no toddler I know! She also has taken on Papa Karim's way of talking (babbling for her) on the phone (very direct, Pakistani style with the right hand moving up/down for emphasis!). Everyone that knows Karim, just shakes their head & tells me she will be a talker! All I can say is . . . Tina York get ready because I think you have some competition!!

Gracy also LOVES to dance! Everytime she hears music (mobile phone, TV, or just Mama singing to her, etc) she starts to shake the boo-dee! It is so cute, it just makes everyone laugh, including Gracy.

Yes, we are ready to come home! Pray for good news next week.

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - Osama bin Laden

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 03 May 2011 00:41:00 +0000

Just a quick note to say "We are OK!" It is just another day in Islamabad, even though 30 miles away Osama bin Laden was captured.

We are trying to expedite the USE immigrant visa as quickly as we can. I'll send a more detailed adoption update later.

I'm so busy with Gracy these days . . . she is 24/7 (I LOVE IT!).

Please remember . . . God is in Control!

Take care & we will see you soon!

Nancy & Gracy :)

Hello, from Pakistan - High Court Appeal

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 05 Apr 2011 00:45:00 +0000

So . . . another adoption update - going on 83 days, 11.75 weeks, I'll go ahead & call it 3 months.

Wednesday (3/23) - A sunny day of wait & a Pakistan holiday . . . Independence Day . . . We went to visit our park family friends again today. The mother gave me a piece of beautiful cloth for a shalwar kemeez (traditional Pakistani dress). She took me to visit her sister who is a tailor to have the shalwar kemeez tailor made for me. The sister lives in what is called a "Christian Community" (where our park family friends previously lived). Sadly . . . this is a nice way of saying the "slums", broken concrete shelters interconnected by narrow alleys. As I walked through the narrow dirt alleyway turning left, then right . . . dodging the blowing trash/litter . . . stepping over broken concrete . . . hiking up my pants to miss the sewer drainage running through . . . I was immediately humbled. Yes, I felt all eyes on me as the people & children stood in awe & watched an obvious Christian (Muslims do not enter here) "white" woman walking through their feeble existence, probably the 1st time most had ever seen a white woman "up close & personal". We passed a woman with an obvious new born & the park mother stopped to congratulate the mother, oohhhing & ahhhing over the tiny infant. As we moved on, I was told it was the family's 8th child. I prayed as I walked through, prayed for God's wisdom & blessing to fall on these people. All I can say is, the need is so great . . . As we finally reached the home where the sister lived . . . again I was humbled as I entered the dwelling. She runs a tailor business from her 1, 8 x 10 room. There were 5 women inside, sitting on the bed & floor. They were happily chattering away in Urdu. The sister was squatting on the floor next to a sewing machine (the black antique kind grandma used). Her nimble fingers efficiently & professionally sewing a beautiful kemeez (Pak tunic). It was royal blue with absolutely beautiful embroidery . . . I found out that it was for one of the young women sitting on the bed . . . her bridal shalwar kemeez. The bride was so excited . . . & I wished her congratulations. The sister would look up every few seconds as she worked away . . . to join in the women's banter, laughing & chatting away (as women do!). She had an assistant for the hand & embroidery work & she passed the bridal dress to the assistant for the finishing touches to be done by hand. Then she turned to me, with a smile, tape measure in hand. She quickly measured me while the assistant wrote down the measurements. Then, the sister went outside for a few minutes & came back with coke & chia (tea) for her customers. Everyone was laughing & enjoying the break. Then the sister began another shalwar kemeez that had recently been cut by the assistant. The assistant finished up the bridal dress & the bride proudly showed it to me. With the park family mother translating (as best she could), I hugged & told the bride she would look beautiful! Then we left . . . walking out the far side of the community, opposite of our entry, where we could find a taxi. As we finally came out of the dark alleys, there was a large clearing. This is where the people live who cannot afford a crumbling concrete home . . . in dirty canvas tents or . . . cardboard/tarp roofed dwellings. There was a small concrete pad with a water hydrant for these families to draw cold water. However, that wasn't the most significant, "invisible elephant standing in the in room". At the far side of the clearing . . . was a huge, huge trash dump . . .which I immediately realized was the source of the "smell" when I first entered the community. At this point, the stench was so intense . . . with the recent rain water mixed in with the run-off drainage going through the alleyways. But, still that was not the most significant of what I saw . . . What hit me the hardest was the people (especially the children) digging through the garbage, trying to find anything they could salvage. How many of these children were orphans?, just trying to exist anyway they could? The park mother & I didn't speak as we walked through this part of the community. In fact, she moved at a double-time pace to get past the sight. But . . . as we reached the top of the crumbling steps, I turned back & watched for several minutes . . . watched the children laugh/play & watched those that "dig". The park mother finally touched my arm to motion me to the taxi. When I looked in her eyes, I saw her embarrassment & disgrace, as she saw the look of shock & tearful heartache in my eyes. After the visit to Edhi Home, I thought I was prepared for anything . . . but nothing had prepared me for this experience. It is the dismal life of the poorest of the poor, Christians in Pakistan. And yet . . . even with the intense poverty . . . life continues . . . young love with the promise of marriage & births of new babies.

Thursday (3/24) - the 1st High Court hearing for the Appeal. My attorneys called me at 8:45 a.m. to tell me the motion/case was #5 on the docket. I rushed to High Court & just as I was almost there . . . my attorney called & said that the case was called & finished in 5 minutes! The HC judge continued the case & ordered 3 summons . . . b.parents, FIA & legal counsel for the State (Civil/District courts). So, the taxi turned around & went back to the guest house. I had left MG with one of the staff "boys" (night security guard). When I walked into the room, the night security guard was reading the Urdu alphabet to Gracy (too cute - she has a book for English ABC & Urdu ABC)! We spend the rest of the day doing laundry!

Friday (3/25) - I received the dictated/attest order from yesterday's hearing. It is continued to next Thursday (3/31). Gracy & I took a walk & played outside the guest house today. It is really starting to get hot now (95+). Since tomorrow is the Visa extension interview with the Ministry of Interior, we went to the market to have copies made of the High Court Appeal application, my passport with all visa extensions & the visa extension form. I also had to have more passport photos made (each visa extension requires 2).

Saturday (3/26) - Shelina, Gracy & I went to the Ministry of Interior at 10:00 am for another interview for another visa extension. This one was a little bit tricky . . . Pakistan only allows US Citizens a total duration of 3 months stay in Pakistan on a single entry, tourist/short term visa. I received the initial visa from the Houston Pakistan Consulate for 30 days which we used in Jan & early Feb. Then Dalend & I extended our visa again for 2 months (expires 4/2). So, that already totals 3 months & technically, I should be leaving for the US. However, my situation is somewhat unique - I have legal custody of a minor child & I'm still in the Pakistani legal process for an amended guardianship order, so I do not have a guardianship certificate yet . . . That means, I can go to the US, but MG cannot. Once Shaleena explained this to the MOI official . . . he understood & approved a 4th month for my particular situation.

While we were at the MOI, we met a very nice journalist from Austria. Of course, Gracy charmed her way into sitting on her lap to play with her iPhone!

Sunday (3/27) – Mama has been having dysentery off/on for the last couple of weeks. Last night & this morning it hit with a vengeance . . . so Mama & Gracy did not go to St Thomas Church. Karim had a couple of the staff watch MG while I slept in the afternoon . . . I had been up most of the night! Gracy loves the "boys" & they love to play with her. She has a little soccer ball that Uppa D got her & they play ball in the driveway. It was so helpful to have someone watch MG so I could get a good nap in!

Monday (3/28) – Another laundry day. MG got soaking wet again & took a dip in her pink pool! A very hot day. But a good day for line drying clothes!

Tuesday (3/29) – Shelina came by to take all the visa extension approval paperwork to the Passport/Visa center. I went early to the market to make copies of everything before she came. Since Gracy is such a wiggle worm . . . the passport/visa center is not the place for her (too many files stacked on the floor & she LOVES paper!) There is no way that Mama can concentrate on what Shaleena is translating with Gracy begging (actually screaming) to be put down! So, Shaleena called ahead & I wrote an authorization for Shaleena to file my extension form for me. Again, the Visa center will keep my passport for 7 days (I get a receipt to carry with me). Next Tuesday we will go pick it up between 2-3:00 p.m. Sameer will go with me to translate.

I really don't what I would have done without Shelina helping with the visa extensions - The guest house owner & family have been a God-send. Sameer accompanies me whenever I go shopping to translate & Shaleena's knowledge of the gov't officials/offices has helped me navigate the passport/visa world. Plus, they are so much fun to be around . . . young 20-something & full of life!

Wednesday (3/30) – Checked in with attorneys late afternoon to make sure all the documents for the 3 parties summoned were completed & ready to go for tomorrow's HC hearing.

The park family's oldest daughter (Mehreen) & her 5 yo daughter (Jenny) came to have lunch with us. The little girl & Gracy had a ball playing. Gracy was so cute trying to play dolls just like Jenny . . . MG "thinks" she is so big!

Thursday (3/31) - 2nd High Court hearing . . . D-Day! Or, I guess . . HC Day! I was up very early, skyped with Nicky/G'ma. Mehreen came to babysit with Gracy while I went to the High Court hearing. This time . . . I was not going to miss it! I arrived at the High Court complex in plenty of time. High Court looks very different from the civil/district complex. It is a much newer building & larger. The security is also much tighter. All the women have to go into a small side shack & be physically searched by a female FIA agent. All bags are scanned & searched. I thought I had remembered everything . . . but, remember my passport?? . . . it is at the visa center! So, I didn't have any identification with me! I had forgotten to bring the receipt from the visa center & the copy of my passport's facing page. Ugghh . . . that is so not like me! Of course, security wouldn't let me through without it! I did have my mobile phone (that I take everywhere) & called my attorney. He was in in route to High Court . . . he had me hand my phone to the security guard & told them to have me wait in the female search shack until he could arrive. I watched as all the attorneys came through in their long black robes (very British). It was so formal looking. Once my attorney was there . . . the security supervisor was called & they had a conversation . . . Then I was whisked through the body scanner & was on my way to High Court! I never went through the physical body search by the female FIA agent.

The case was #5 & was called at 9:30 am. My attorney & I walked to the bench along with the b.parents POA & the Pakistan Deputy Attorney General. The Pak AGO was called to represent the State (both FIA & the Civil/District courts). My attorney & I stood on the right . . . b.parents POA & AGO stood on the left. When the judge saw that I was a woman, he told me to please take a seat behind & to the right of my attorney. Anyway . . . then the court reader read the appeal application. Then the judge asked my attorney to begin. If I ever wondered if my attorney was the right person for the job . . . my concerns were put to rest quickly. I saw Mr. Khan in prime-time action. He has become passionate about this case & it showed in his body language & tone. His arguments were straight to the point, full of emotion for Marina Grace & all the Pakistani orphans, which up to this point, have not had a voice. The entire legal firm has become passionate about this case & the entire firm was present (there are 4-5 attorneys & office staff). I was very proud of my team!

The judge then asked the POA if he had any objections from the b.parents . . . No. The judge then asked the AGO . . . they needed more time to review the case - the judge gave them 24 hours.

This case has become a very important case for the future of Pakistan intercountry adoption, especially for the US. I'm the 1st guardianship appeal case & the 1st Christian adoption case to be heard in High Court. It is all about the word "adoption" & how the US defines it for an IR-4 immigrant visa. However, there is also another precedent . . . how will Pakistan define adoption for a non-Muslim orphan child? . . . the Pakistan law currently does not have a statute for this. Will Pakistan bind them to Shariah Islamic law or not? So, the case is very important . . . But, I'm just an adoptive mother wanting to do what is in the best interests for my child . . . And . . . in the process will create a precedent for all future US intercountry adoptions in Pakistan.

Friday (4/1) - My attorney called me at 9:15 am to tell me that the Attorney General's Office had indeed responded with an objection to the case. There was another hearing scheduled quickly at 10:00 am to try to reach an agreement/ruling before Saturday (another holiday!). Since I didn't have childcare & since the hearing was called so quickyly, I decided it was best that I didn't try to attend . . . and I had heard all the arguments the the day before. So, my attorney quickly made an appointment at 9:15 am with the Attorney General's Office to visit about the case prior to the 10:00 hearing. Mr Khan again went over the merits of the case with the Attorney General . . . and, finally, the Deputy AG was directed to enter a reluctant "No objection" at the 10:00 am hearing!! At 10:15 am, the High Court judge approved our appeal!!! Mr. Khan had persuaded the gov't of Pakistan to continue to allow intercountry IR-4 adoptions & . . . set the 1st High Court case precedent for non-Muslim intercoutry adoption!

I was so excited . . . I threw Gracy up in the air over & over! Of course, she doesn't understand the significance of all this, but . . . she laughed & giggled anyway! I called the US, woke my family up & told them . . . we WON!

Saturday (4/2) - We woke up to an overcast day, but we were all smiles anyway . . . (OK, this is not a belated April Fools - those with weak stomachs might want to skip this part!) UNTIL the 11 yo daughter (Marish) of the park family came to me & told me she thought Gracy had head lice! I checked Gracy & then had my head checked also. Yep! . . . we have an infestation of head lice, both of us! So . . . we can add that to our "critter" list, lol! When we came home from Russia, we had Scabies . . . Now, Head Lice . . . I think we have now covered the "mite" family. The park family mother (Saleena, not the same as the guest house owner's daughter Shaleena!) walked to the Chemist shop with me to get the necessary items Dr. Rubina told me to get - English Anti-Lice Shampoo & a nit comb. Then we went to work . . . Karim had the beds stripped & the blankets removed. I bagged up all Gracy's toys, last 2 days of clothes & anything else that was fabric that couldn't be washed. Thankfully, the floor is tile. Then, I treated our head/hair. Saleena began on my head with the nit comb & I started in on Gracy's. OK, trying to get a 21 mo to sit still while Mama "tries" to pick out nits . . . is impossible. I tried for an hour Saturday night & Gracy just screamed . . . Not sure how we are going to do this! What an exhausting day . . .

Court is closed today for another holiday - no high court order dictated yet. I did, however, receive my shalwar kameez from the tailor . . . it is lovely.

Sunday (4/3) - I don't think church is in the plan for today! I started going through Gracy's head again & I'm telling you she now has twice as many nits . . . how can that be after treating her head twice yesterday??? I spent all day, in 5 minutes intervals, going through Gracy's hair, pulling out nits . . . all day long! I treated our hair again just before bed & had the sheets changed. We will see what we look like in the morning.

Monday (4/4) - Again overcast . . . & it looks like rain today. No matter . . . the day is spent trying to pick out nits from Gracy's hair & mine. At 6:00 pm, I finally texted Dr. Rubina & asked if there was anything I could use that will kill the mite & the nit together (the nits multipy so fast!). She called the chemist for a special oil/lotion. The directions were all in Urdu, so I had Sameer read them to me! It's not supposed to be used on children under 2, but Dr. Rubina told me it would be ok, just be careful not to get in eyes or mouth. This is strong stuff!! I hope it works! You leave it on for 2 hours, then rinse out. I had to really entertain Gracy (stand on my head, piggy back rides, you name it) so she wouldn't put her hands in her hair & then in her mouth! I then spent another 2 hours (while Gracy slept) pulling out Gracy's nits (this solution broke the nit hold on the hair shaft & they came out very easy). While she slept, I treated myself, spent 1 hour with the nit comb on my hair . . . then I fell exhausted into bed! I'm hoping we are on the downhill side of this . . . However, I'm still smiling . . .

My attorneys told me the writ/order is still in the "writ room" waiting to be processed . . . they assure me that we do have an approval & it is only a matter of time, 1-2 days for the attested amendment order to be processed. I can't wait to finally hold that precious piece of paper!!!

So . . . That brings us up to date . . . :)

Gracy has some new words -

"Bye-Bye" as she waves
"Ahh-low" (hello) when she holds the phone to her ear.
"Peek" for Peek-a-Boo.
"Baahh" (bottle/sippy cup)
"EE-OO" (Nido - formula, yes this is usually screamed)
"Naahh" (mixture of "No" English & "Nahin" Urdu)
"Ahh-ma" (Grandma)
"Uppa D" very clear.
"Mama" is not only said now , but screamed!

I know this was a long update, but quite the week, my friends! Major highs . . . some minor lows, but Gracy's smile lets me know, without a doubt, it is so worth it!

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - District Court Appeal Ruling - Denial

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 00:51:00 +0000

So . . . another adoption update - going on 70 days, 10 weeks, 2.5 months.

Thursday (3/10) - the 5th hearing for the District Court Appeal. FIA was the last witness that has not appeared before the district judge & when our case (#19) was called, no one from FIA was present. The initial hearing was very short, maybe 10 minutes, at the most. We entered the required FIA appearance summons into the case's evidence. The judge smiled when my attorney again asked for the judge to please consider the length of time this appeal has taken & rule expeditiously. On our way to find a taxi, the FIA Director finally arrived & my attorney, FIA Director & myself quickly went back to the district court for the judge to question the FIA Dir. When we got there the power went out & the rest of the hearing was conducted without any power or lights. The daylight shone through the one small window, which barely gave us reading light. The judge asked the FIA Dir questions, then asked me more questions, all very confusing, actually. But, nonetheless, it finally ended about 30 minutes later. Will we hear a ruling? . . . we will know when we see it. The judge gave no indication one way or another. We went back to the guest house & resumed our normal daily routine . . . it has become so familiar now. Gracy naps, Uppa D works & Mama does laundry, make bottles & plays with Sweet Pea (& does a little computer work, mostly emails!)!

We had to make the final decision if Uppa D would return home on Sunday or not. The flight's deadline for ticketing was today . . . it is the right decision to have Uppa D fly home. I have a wonderful support group here & I know I will be just fine!

Friday (3/11) - the District Judge asked for my attorney to appear before her in the afternoon (an impromptu 6th hearing). He called me after the impromptu hearing to tell me that the judge would probably deny our appeal for an amended order. I guess the judge made several remarks about intercountry adoption . . . I don't believe I have heard my attorney this irritated with any of the judges up to this point. But, this is not a surprise, I had expected a denial from the minute the district judge looked in my eyes . . . I just knew. So . . . we will appeal to High Court . . .

Saturday (3/12) - Uppa D & Gracy played together a lot today. We finished up the packing (with Gracy's help, of course). Then we went to the park. On the way, we met a family that the previous week Dalend had treated the little girls to ice cream. The father saw us walking & came out to thank Dalend for the treat. He asked us to come to his house. They live in the servants quarters of a large home & one of his daughters is the cook. They are a lovely family. It was a very surreal moment when we stepped into their home, one simple room (~ 10 x 8). A family of 6 lives there. We stayed for dinner, rice with potatoes & boiled eggs in curry sauce. Very tasty!. We have been in the wealthiest of homes and also the poorest of homes, such a contrast in this country. It was a special evening with a very loving family.

Sunday (3/13) – Uppa D left at 1:00 a.m. He sat beside Gracy for a few minutes watching her sleep, then gave her a kiss good bye . . . she smiled in her sleep. I watched from the terrace as he drove away in the taxi. It is just the girls now!!! Later in the morning we went to St Thomas Church . . . It was a beautiful day & it cheered up the day. Then home to the guest house for lunch & nap time.

Monday (3/14) – Waiting for the ruling & order dictation from the district judge. Without that, we can not begin the appeal process in high court. So, we wait . . . Mama does laundry today, a nice sunny day to dry laundry outside! It is starting to really warm up. The day's temp was over 90 degrees. Just last week it was only in the 70's. They say that the "cold" leaves quickly here & the "hot" just appears!

Tuesday (3/15) – Waiting for the ruling . . . Mama finished up the laundry & folded clothes. Gracy played on the terrace (yes, in her diaper). Again another very warm day (90's). No A/C! But, we run the fans & it keeps it cool inside. Since the buildings are masonry construction, it stays cooler inside.

I also received a text late afternoon from my attorney that the district judge had dictated the order, but it was not signed/attested yet. Hopefully tomorrow . . .

Wednesday (3/16) – My attorneys appear each morning at 9:30 a.m. in front of the district judge to inquire about the ruling. The judge is "working on it" & it will be finished sometime this week. Mama & Gracy decide to do a little shopping. Since I don't have another set of hands . . . I purchased a stroller. This helps a great deal when we take our walk, go to the market, etc. Both Mama & Gracy got new sandals (it is too hot for boots!). Gracy got a new light cotton dress & Mama got a few new light weight summer kameez (Pakistani tunics). I'm told the temp is now going to be in the 90+'s. When we got back home, Gracy played in her green tub full of water on the terrace (she takes a bath in it too). She splashed to her heart's content! She had a ball! This girlie is action-packed, let me tell you! It is so good to see her soooo happy :)

Still waiting on the signed/attested district court order . . .

Thursday (3/17) - A Very Hot Day!!! We go for a walk with the stroller early in the morning while it is still cool. Gracy loves the new stroller . . . she just sings as we stroll along (too cute!) There is now a power ration. So, the power goes out 4 hours a day. In 2009, we experienced this as well. However, now they have a scheduled outage in Islamabad. This really helps in scheduling your day. We know when the power will be shut off & can schedule accordingly. The power goes out at 2:00 - 3:00 a.m., 8:00 - 9:00 a.m., 11:00 a.m. - 12:00 noon & 2:00 - 3:00 p.m. We skype with Nicky, G'ma at 6:30 a.m., then eat breakfast, then take our walk between 8:00 - 9:00 a.m. (while the power is out), then come back & get ready for our day once the power comes back on.

We went to Edhi Home for a visit late afternoon & had tea with the staff. The director was not there, but we had a wonderful time. I actually was invited into the "big house". We had been received only in the reception area (which is a small 3 room entry building at the front gates). The Edhi Home ladies were so thrilled to see Gracy (they call her Marina). She truly has grown!

I also received notice that finally, the order is signed & attested. It was completed late afternoon & will be available for my attorneys tomorrow am. YEAH!

Friday (3/18) - My attorneys scanned the order & sent it to me. It was as expected . . . Denial. It took 4 weeks to be denied . . . But, this truly is a step forward. Now we are not tied to the District Court with continuous delays. We are free to move on to High Court. I met with my attorneys late afternoon & reviewed all the documents for the appeal to High Court. It will be filed tomorrow (Sat) & we are very hopeful that the HC court hearing will be on Monday! I ask for prayers & positive thoughts for this "new round" of Pakistani court.

We had another visit with Edhi Home early afternoon. The director had just returned from Karachi & wanted to see Gracy . . . so back to Edhi Home we went at 2:00 to see the director. I received a wonderful, surreal surprise when I got there . . . the day before I asked if I could see where Gracy had lived at Edhi. I was told that only the director could give permission & . . . yes, she agreed! So, once we arrived today, the director took me into the living quarters of the orphans & homeless. There are no words to explain the experience. Stepping into the dark, little, concrete room where Gracy lived for 16 months was like walking to a sacred place for me. There is something about seeing the cribs where my babies slept that just touches my mother's soul. When I touch my child's crib, I pray for their healing (body, mind & soul). I can still remember that feeling of sacredness in Russia when I was allowed to see Nicky's crib & groupa . . . & now here in Pakistan with Gracy's little white, iron, paint-peeled crib & room. Both my children's orphanage rooms are nothing special. In fact, less than adequate, pitiful in comparison to what would be considered a child's "proper" environment. But, to me, both places are like shrines . . . it is part of who they are. I'm simply their "stepping stone" from "there" to "here". . . And, that, my friends, is why I'm their Mama . . . why I created my family through intercountry adoption . . .

There is also a TV cable strike going on here today . . . so no English channels on TV. I'm glad I watched American Idol last night! Yes, I have to admit I am watching American Idol. I'm usually not one to get "hooked" on any specific TV show . . . but since there are so few English channels . . . I'm now, sadly, an Idol Fan.

Saturday (3/19) - We awoke to overcast skies & it rained today! A nice cooling, steady rain to cool the day. I was prepared to do laundry this morning . . . but that will have to wait for another day. At 12:00 we walked to the home of our park family friends for lunch. We spent about 3 hours there just visiting. Gracy completely wore the little 5 year-old girl out playing & finally the little girl fell asleep. Gracy, of course, was still going strong & kept trying to wake her to play. Gracy is quite the active child & will fight sleep until she just drops. We left when the rain stopped & walked back to the guest house for a nap (have I mentioned how wonderful the stroller is!!!). After a bottle & mama walking the floor for a few minutes, she finally fell asleep. So, now mama can get on the computer & catch up on emails!!!

My attorneys filed the application for High Court appeal of the guardianship order amendment denial.

Sunday (3/20) - Gracy & I dressed in our new dresses (Mama in a new sharwal kameez & Gracy in a new summer dress!). We looked pretty great (if I can brag on my little girl, a bit!). As we were leaving to get in the taxi . . . Mama slipped on the top step of the guest house stair case (from the 2nd floor) & fell all the way to the bottom . . . with Gracy! The staircase is 3 split levels of 6-8 steps each. I was still on my feet when we hit the 1st landing, but then fell forward. We hit the hard terrazzo floor. Gracy landed 1st directly on her face & then mama fell on top of her & rolled over her!. What a horrible fall!!! The guest house owner immediately ran to pick us up. Gracy's forehead began immediately to swell, so I called Dr. Rubina & made an emergency visit. Dr. Rubina said no x-rays were needed for Gracy & everything else was just "surface" damage. She checked both of us out (mama had a couple of nasty abrasions). So, needless to say, we didn't make it to church :). We are both ok, Gracy has healed faster than mama (lol!). I'm still limping along with a sore hip, knee, elbow & shoulder. How I want to have a massage at St. Francis Health Zone, right now! We took it easy in the afternoon, Gracy on her children's ibuprofen & mama on adult ibuprofen; & both with special ointment prescribed by Dr. Rubina. I know, I know . . . I'm an accident waiting to happen & have been ever since I was a child! The carpet on the edge of the steps is very, very worn & I tend to step on the step edge & I'm always in a hurry to go someplace . . . I need to slow down & watch where I place my foot on the steps!!! And, I have promised, promised that I will call someone to help carry Gracy down the steps. You know . . . every travel I take has to have some physical accident (lol!) Amazing . . . how innocently it all happens! (I haven't even told you about the car driving over my foot waiting for a taxi at court!!! A story for another time! lol)

At 2:00 p.m. our park family came to have tea with me at the guest house. Just the aunt & one of the daughters came (the daughter I have really bonded with, she is a single parent of a sweet 5 yo girl). We had a great time visiting & learning about each others lives. We laughed & laughed. Mehreen (daughter) knows English very well & has quite the sense of humor!

Monday (3/21) - The High Court hearing was supposed to be scheduled for this morning, but my attorney called at 9:00 a.m. & told me that the court reader could not read some of the copied documents & has asked for darker copies. Yes, it is frustrating about how the smallest of insignificant details delays when the larger issues seem to go unnoticed . . . but we soldier on! Instead, Mama & Gracy did laundry! It was a bright sunny day so we spent about 3 hours washing, rinsing & hanging our clothes. Gracy is such a big, big "helper". She starts off with her clothes on & by the time we are finished . . . she is a naked baby girl! She loves to take off her clothes! So, Mama puts nice, fresh, clean, warm water in the green wash basin & we play in the water on the terrace. Gracy splish splashes as Mama sings "Splish Splash I was Taken a Bath . . . ". We have great fun on laundry day! It makes the hard work so much more enjoyable with a 21 mo little girl helping! (of course, it takes longer, but we definitely have the time . . .).

Tuesday (3/22) - Again I was ready for High Court at 8:30 a.m. HC begins at 9:00 & my attorney is to call me at 8:30 with our case # to be heard. Then I take a taxi to the high courts 30 minutes before the case # time. This is different from civil & district court. You go at 9:30 for those 2 courts because your case # to be heard could change without notice. This is not the case in High Court. My attorney called at 8:45 a.m. to tell me that, again, our case is not on the docket of cases for today. There has been an overage of cases scheduled since Wednesday (3/23) is a public holiday. So, my attorney spoke directly with the HC judge & asked for an expedited case #. We will be heard 1st thing Thursday a.m.(24th). Yes, slow steps forward . . . but still forward :)

Since we are again delayed another week to submit the USCIS IR-4 immigrant visa dossier . . . I will have to extend my visa again for a 2nd time. My visa expires on 4/2 & it is obvious that we will not have the IR-4 immigrant visa for Gracy by then. Shaleena (guest house owner's daughter working with NGO) will again help me with the visa extension process.

So . . . That brings us up to date . . . :)

All I can do is just keep taking faithful steps forward, knowing that in the end . . . Gracy will have a loving family every child deserves & a life full of potential!!!

As always, Karim/Sameer (guest house owners) keep me up on adult conversation. We go down to the lobby everyday to visit. And . . . our dear pastor friends at St Thomas Church are always near by. And . . . my attorneys have become very good friends, as well. As they told me on Friday, "This has become not just your case, but our case. We are bonded with Marina Grace, as well. We will see this through for her best interests." They offer any help they can with our stay in Pakistan. So, we are surrounded by a wonderful support group that I trust & I can truly say that the "spirit" of this trip is divine. It certainly has not turned out as planned, but I'm learning to joyfully live in the unexpected moments! Beautiful memories have been made during this unexpected "waiting"!

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Love & Blessings,
Nancy (Mama) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - District Court Appeal & Waiting for a Ruling . . .

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 01:57:00 +0000

So . . . here is another update for the last 1.5 weeks . . . We have been in Pakistan now for 57 days, 8 weeks, 2 months.

Saturday (2/26) - the 3rd hearing for the District Court Appeal. All parties were summoned to appear, however FIA (Federal Investigative Agency . . . like our FBI) did not appear. Edhi Home (orphanage) did have a representative . . . a wonderful woman by the name of Farrah (Fa-dd-ah) who I have come to know & love. The Power of Attorney for the b.family was also present . . . & of course, the petitioner . . . me. It was a very interesting hearing . . . the judge is very new to the realm of intercountry guardianship/adoption & needs some time to truly understand the complexities. She (yes, the judge is a woman, very rare here) is a tough judge & sees the complexities of "adoption" through Pakistani eyes/opinion. She is not comfortable at all with the amendment wording to the order that would comply with US immigration law. As she states, "a conflict between two country's laws . . . my oath is to the Pakistani law, not the US law." So, we will have to wait until Monday to see if/how she rules.

Sunday (2/27) – It was finally a beautiful sunny day. We went to church & had a wonderful service. After the service, we visited with the pastor in the parsonage/vicarage where the Pastor lives with his family. Once back at the guest house, it was time for mama to do the laundry (I feel like a regular Pakistani woman hand washing & air drying!). Late Sunday afternoon was nap-city . . . Gracy took a very long nap!

Monday (2/28) – A raining day of wait . . . inside the guest house . . . Up the stairs/down the stairs . . . exploring every knock & cranny of the small space. The courts close at 3:00 p.m.. So . . . waiting through the raining day for the district court ruling . . . My Pak. attorney called late afternoon . . . the district judge had continued the case until next Saturday (5th). She also asked the court reader to pull the entire court file (including the case file from 2009) and the guardianship order case file from Nov/Dec/Jan . . . & have it delivered to her home. She told my attorney she wanted to study the entire case from start to finish during the week. Also, since FIA did not appear before the court on Sat (26th), she has asked for a 2nd summons to be sent to FIA for the hearing on the 5th. Wait, wait, wait . . . All I can do is know that we have disclosed everything . . . nothing has been hidden . . . Faith & Trust takes over, at this point.

Tuesday (3/1) – Rain, rain, rain - we need some sunshine so Gracy can go outside & play. Gracy runs to the door of the terrace/balcony & begs to go outside. All toys have become very boring . . . so we go "up the stairs/down the stairs" seems to be the only interesting activity. Later in the afternoon, we go to the market for supplies (Nido formula, baby food, juice, etc.) Just getting outside of the guest house is a treat! We shop the market for a while just to stretch out legs. The market is very, very interesting! People everywhere, vendors in tiny, tiny stores trying to "sell" you everything from jewelry to carpets to furniture. I love browsing, but they want you to BUY!

Wednesday (3/2) – The weather is a bit better today . . . cool, overcast, but no Rain. We go outside for Gracy to run up/down the drive. The security guards get a kick out of seeing her come out to play. , rain, rain - we need some sunshine so Gracy can go outside & play. Gracy runs to the door of the terrace/balcony & begs to go outside. All toys have become very boring . . . so we go "up the stairs/down the stairs" seems to be the only interesting activity. Later in the afternoon, we go to the market for supplies (Nido formula, baby food, juice, etc.) Just getting outside of the guest house is a treat! We shop the market for a while just to stretch out legs. The market is very, very interesting! People everywhere, vendors in tiny, tiny stores trying to "sell" you everything from jewelry to carpets to furniture. I love browsing, but they want you to BUY!

Thursday (3/3) - Still cool & overcast . . . a peaceful day of wait & play at the guesthouse . . .

Friday (3/4) - Another visit to Dr. Rubina. Gracy's lungs are much, much healthier! YEAH! Dr. Rubina is very charmed by Gracy & loves for her to sit on her lap. Gracy "helps" Dr. Rubina write the prescriptions! Our sweet baby girl is getting stronger everyday . . . Gracy is on just vitamins now (B, D, iron, calcium & a multivitamin).

Saturday (3/5) - the 4th hearing for the District Court Appeal. We appear at district court at 9:30 a.m. where we find out our case number for the day . . . I didn't ask what our exact number was this time (I need to remember to do that for Gracy's book! It was #17.) Anyway, it was a low number because our case was heard within about 1.5 hours, so probably about 10:00/10:15 (anywhere between #15-20). It was very short today . . . the judge required the summons document for FIA. Since FIA didn't appear last Saturday (3rd hearing), the judge requested a 2nd summons for FIA to appear today . . . However, FIA still did not send a representative. But, my attorneys had all the proper documentation to support that the summons was done properly & received by FIA. We also have to show the original Public at Large Notices (they come out in the local paper). Again, my attorneys were completely prepared with all requirements from the judge. It lasted only about 10-15 minutes . . .the judge was unusually reserved about our case. She mentioned nothing about her study of the complete court files of the case she had asked for to study this week. However, a criminal case was just before our case & it was a very loud, heated discussion on bail . . . so maybe she was just worn down :). Anyway, she didn't convey how she would rule one way or the other. We will have to just wait Mon/Tues to see what is on her mind now!

After the court hearing . . . we went back to the guest house for some down time . . . a visit with Karim (owner) & Sameer (his son). They have become like family to us, along with our dear friends at St Thomas Church. Later in the afternoon, Pastor Nadeem called to see how court went . . . he always has such encouraging words.

Sunday (3/6) – It was a awesome beautiful sunny day (high 70's). We went to church & had a wonderful service. After the service, we had our regular cup of chia tea & visited with all our international friends & made some new ones. New people come to St Thomas on a weekly basis . . . some staying only a short time . . . others for many months. Each has their own unique story. There is such a big world out there with all kinds of people from different walks of life . . . so different from my daily life of oil/gas HR/PR & Oklahoma (although I love too!). But, I have always had a love of international life & consider it such a wonderful experience to spend time in other countries . . . I really do love it. I love to visit with people (as you all know . . . no one is a stranger to me!). I met a young man from DC today, doing research for his dissertation on international diplomacy. He says he will be here a month. He already looked the part with his sharwal kameez (native dress). He shared how frustrating it is with the pace of life in Pakistan . . . every appointment takes 3 levels of approval & then a week's wait. I smiled & commiserated with him. In one breath both Dalend & I said "I know! . . .". But, we encouraged him to be patient & his goal of interview appointments with top gov't & religious leaders would eventually be realized. I did mention to him, with a light hearted smile . . . to be prepared to double his time in Pakistan! We visited with Pastor Nadeem & his daughter Nayab took Gracy immediately (Nayab loves the little children & Gracy LOVES her)! Then it was home to the guest house for lunch & nap time.

Monday (3/7) – Gracy turns 21 months old today! We arrived in Pakistan 5 days after she turned 19 months old. I have had custody about 6 weeks now. In that time, she has gained 3 pounds & grown taller, about .5 inch. She will let me touch her feet to the ground now! (in the beginning, so sick, only I could touch her & she wouldn't walk). In fact, she is now a bubbly, cubby, non-stop walker/talker! Her hair no longer feels like straw. Her hair has also grown & is shiny & curly! I'm so thankful for Dr. Rubina's care & of course, God's healing touch (Mama & Uppa D helped with that too)!

The judge did not rule on our case today . . . so we wait to see if a ruling comes tomorrow.

Tuesday (3/8) – A beautiful sunny day . . . so it is laundry day. We had been having our laundry sent out to the doby walla, but to save on expenses, I have been doing all of the baby laundry the "old fashioned" way . . . by hand & line dry. If I do it every couple of days (as long as the sun shines) I can keep up with it just fine. The bright sun dries everything very fast . . . but laundry hung inside will not dry fast at all & has to be hung out in front of the space heater (very small). But . . . it works! And, we are doing just fine (although mama's fingers are a little sore!)

Today the district judge ordered to continue our case again for another hearing, Thursday (3/10). She has requested a 3rd summons for FIA. So, once again we'ill go to the district courts Thursday am at 9:30 to see what she says for this hearing. It will be the 5th hearing for our appeal to district court for the guardianship order amendment for 2 words " . . . . immigration and adoption . . .". This is a requirement for an IR-4 immigrant visa per USCIS immigration law.

Wednesday (3/9) – Another beautiful sunny day . . . all week is supposed to be very nice in the 70's. While Gracy napped, Dalend walked to the market & got supplies. He also got Gracy something special . . . a set of 1st books! Gracy loves books & the few we have, have become well worn with Gracy's "love". So, she now has some new ones! Such a thoughtful gift from Uppa D. Dalend loves to walk to the market, just a nice walk to get out & stretch the legs! Gracy is now awake so while Uppa D is reading books with Gracy, I'm catching up on emails that I wasn't able to view for a couple of days because webmail was down. That is why I couldn't send an update earlier. We will probably go to the park later & play outside. These days, Gracy begs to be outside running & playing. I get such joy watching her . . .

Gracy is quickly learning . . . she now says "Uppa D", "Thank You" (not really understandable but she shakes her head 2 times as she says it, so you know what she means!). And, the newest one this week . . . "Apple" . . . you know how the ABC book goes . . . "A is for Apple". Now everything she points to is an "apple" (lol!). It is sooooo cute!

Thursday (3/10) - will be a defining day with the court hearing . . . Dalend is really needing to return to work (never expected to be gone this long & although he is keeping up with his work, his temp office help is needing spring break off for her children). So, Dalend will leave this weekend, Sunday 3/13. Unless, we are able to get an immigrant visa by then! That is not realistically likely. Yet, this entire adoption has been a precious miracle & it is in God's timing that everything will happen . . . His Perfect Timing.

Faith & Trust guide us . . .

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Nancy (Mama), Dalend (Uppa D) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - District Court Appeal . . .

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Sat, 26 Feb 2011 02:01:00 +0000

So sorry . . . for the delay in an update. We have been under the weather here in Pakistan - I guess "new" germs!!!

Tuesday (2/15) – Went to our favorite sweet shop (Narila) & got sweets for Valentine’s Day. Yes, a day late, but today was a bright, shining day unlike yesterday - - - rain, rain, rain!

Later in the afternoon, we went over to see the new property that the guest house owners have been working on, an extended stay property for terms of 1 month +. We met a tenant orginally from the US – US law professor – from Austin, TX. He has traveled the world teaching law in different countries & is here in Islamabad for a year to teach.

Wednesday (2/16) – Pakistan Holiday – The Day of the Prophet (Mohammed’s birthday).

Thursday (2/17) – It was a beautiful day so in the afternoon, we took a long 2 hour walk to the market, stopping at different shops as we went along.

Friday (2/18) – Appeal District Court Hearing day, 1st hearing – Our day's case number for the hearing was #21. We waited about 1.5 hours before our hearing came up. Unfortunately, the judge needed more information & continued the hearing for next Tuesday (2/22).

In the late afternoon, we had a visit from friends from St Thomas Church.

Saturday(2/19) – We were going to spend the day sight-seeing with some church friends, but Gracy started to run a fever. We decided we needed to keep her inside, it was a chilly day. Later in the night, Gracy started to run an even higher temp. What a night!

Sunday (2/21) – It rained during the night & the day was very overcast & somewhat cool (about 50-55 degrees). Gracy had a very bad cough & running nose & she was full of congestion again. So, we decided not to attend church. The church is not heated & is somewhat open-air. Not the best place for a baby that is full of cold. So, I gave her some cough/cold medicine & she fell back to sleep after breakfast.

Monday (2/21) – We took Gracy back to the doctor & she has a severe case on bronchitis. She is back on antibiotics & several other medicines.

Tuesday (2/22) – Continued District Court Hearing, 2nd hearing - our number today was #15, so the case came up rather quickly. However, the judge is not at all favorable to our appeal . . . it will be difficult . . . the judge continued the hearing to Saturday (26th) & requires all parties to make an appearance. So, we are basically back to 1/14 timeline.

We meet with a local artist to have Gracy's portrait drawn. I had a pencil drawing done of Nicholas in Moscow along Arbat street. So, I decided it would be nice to have one of Gracy from Islamabad.

Dalend & I start to become ill during the night. I guess it is new germs here in Pakistan or something we caught from Gracy (she is a walking germ-feast right now - but still a sweetie!!). We started running fevers & sore throats. We are all down for the count! I don't think I have ever experienced such a sore throat!

Wednesday (2/23) – Everyone is still sick, especially Gracy. On the stronger medication, she is sleeping about 6 hours during the day. She is a very sick baby girl!

I'm pulling together additional documents needed for the district court appeal on Saturday. All the documents are needed by Thursday to file in time for Saturday's hearing. It has been quite a surprise to all of us that all parties will have to appear again at Saturday's hearing. Trying to make sure we are prepared!

Thursday (2/24) - naps, hydration, naps, more medicine, naps, more tissues, naps, chicken soup, naps . . . Gracy extremely dislikes the nose aspirator! We are all so under the weather!!!

Friday (2/25) - A little better today, Gracy is very sick, but begging to go outside . . . but it has been very chilly all week. She has thoroughly explored & discovered every corner in the guest house room, lobby & common area. Another visit to the doctor tonight to make sure Gracy's lungs are getting better . . .

Saturday (2/26) - the 3rd hearing for the District Court Appeal. All parties have been notified & we are hopeful that all will be present. Please keep us in your thoughts & prayers . . . that tomorrow will be the day for an amendment approval. I'll let everyone know how it goes . . .

It has been a very difficult week - We hope & pray for sunshine & health & an amended guardianship order!

Take care . . . talk to you soon!

Nancy (Mama), Dalend (Uppa D) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - waiting . . .

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 02:04:00 +0000

So . . . another adoption update . . .

Friday (4th) - we went to the Ministry of Interior (not Pakistan Consulate - that is US terminology) to get the very important approval to extend our Pakistan visas. It is quite the process so we took someone who is very familar with the process with us. We had to show the important , adoption documentation, answer a few questions & it was finally approved. We had a wonderful young Pakistani lady helping us that does visa work on a regular basis for a Japanese NGO here in Pakistan.

Saturday (5th) - It was a beautiful day, so in the afternoon we took Gracy to the park just a block away. An ice cream vender (bicycle vendor) came by so . . . we all had ice cream - Gracy's 1st ice cream! We played at the park for about an hour & then we went back to the guest house for naps.

Sunday (6th) - This is the original date of our return home . . . but unfortunately that has had to change. Yes, I'm homesick for my little guy!!! We went to church at St Thomas again & saw all the wonderful people there. It was Gracy's 1st church service. The pastors specially recognized our sweet pea, Marina Grace & called her a "beautiful miracle". We visited with the international people that have become very dear to us. They are from all around the world - Australia, New Zealand, Wales, UK, Canada, Germany, etc. - we have met so many wonderful people that have a wonderful work/mission in Pakistan. We also had Domino's pizza for dinner!!! Yes, they deliver in Islamabad too! (on a motorcycle!)

Monday (7th) - We went to the visa center to file our Pakistan visa extensions. When we walked into the visa center . . . all I saw were stacks & stacks of files . . . on the floor, on tables, on shelves. It literally was taking over the room! They took our passports (a very uncomfortable feeling to have your passport taken from you in a foreign country!). But, we were assured that it is the way it is done in Pakistan. Of course, we took copies of our facing page & visa page prior to handing the passports over. We now have to wait 7 days before we can go back to the visa center & pick them up with the new visa extension stamp. After that, we went to the passport center to see if Gracy's Pakistani passport was finally processed. It was done!!!! This was a wonderful moment to finally hold her passport! Now, on with the medical exam required by the USCIS immigration process (you have to have the country's passport to do this step) . . . we were able to get a 3:00 p.m. appointment for her USCIS medical exam. It took about an hour, the doctor asked some questions, took her measurements, checked her out thoroughly (yes, she screamed the entire time!) & said she was a beautiful, healthy little girl! We waited about 30 minutes for the final medical report (sealed in an envelope) & we were done with the USCIS medical!

Also, my Pakistan attorneys filed an application to amend the guardianship order today. Per USCIS immigration law, a minor orphan child cannot be brought into the US for immigration without the petitionor having the intentions on adopting the child. So, the statement in the order must have the exact wording " . . . . to take the child overseas for immigration and adoption . . ." Since Pakistan does not recognize adoption, these 2 words "and adoption" were accidently left out of the order & it was not caught prior to attestation. So, now the order must be amended. And, unfortunately, the judge we had during the guardianship hearings was transferred to the high court. There is now a new judge assigned to the civil court . . . we hope & pray the new judge will grant the amendment application.

All in all, this was a VERY productive day.

Tuesday (8th) - Gracy had another doctor's appointment with a child specialist who has been taking care of her since we picked her up from Edhi. We also were invited to have lunch at the Marriot Hotel. The chef goes to church at St Thomas & he wanted us to come to the lunch buffet. We had to go through 2 sets of security, once for the taxi (which could only go so far) & then we had to walk about 2 blocks & go through a body scanner/bag search. Then we could enter the Marriot Hotel! The lunch was wonderful, Shahid is a wonderful chef. I also noticed that there was a Microsoft Convention going on. I visited with a couple of UK gentlemen that were there as consultants/session leaders. Very interesting . . . I would have liked to have stayed for a few of the sessions! (Vic, could I have counted that as "work"??? :) )

Wednesday (9th) - A day of wait. We decided to go to McDonald's for dinner. Nicky's 1st Happy Meal was in Moscow, Russia in Sept 2004 . . . so we decided that Gracy needed to have her 1st Happy Meal in Islamabad, Pakistan! So, off we went . . . . once again major security to go through. 1st set of security is for the car (taxi). Then once you are in the parking lot, you have to go through a body scanner/bag search before you can enter through the McDonald's door. All of that security . . . just for a hamburger! However, it was worth it . . . Gracy loved her french fries!!! There was standing room only & I had to wait in line for a high chair!

Thursday (10th) - We found out the civil court judge denied our application for amendment to the guardianship order. After a long consultation with attorneys . . . the best plan is to appeal to the district/high court. So, my Pakistan attorneys will work on the appeal & hopefully have it ready to file Monday/Tuesday. A disappointing day . . . but we soldier on . . .

Friday (11th) - It started raining. The pastor from St Thomas Church visited with us for chia (tea) in the afternoon. We used google earth to show him where our houses are in Tulsa, OK.

Saturday (12th) - Still raining . . . . A day of inside play . . . & email/computer catch up.

Sunday (13th) - Still raining . . . However, we did make it through the rain to St Thomas Church! Naps in the afternoon while mama caught up on emails. We also had Domino's pizza delivered again for dinner.

Monday (14th) - Still raining . . . it even hailed today. Happy Valentine's Day! (Pakistan doesn't celebrate) We skyped with the whole family using Skype's group video conferencing feature! It was wonderful, we had 3 groups in our call . . . so much fun! In the afternoon at 2:00 p.m. we went to the visa center to claim our US passports with visa extensions . . . yes, it all worked out fine & our passports didn't disappear in the "stacks" of bundled files. We also had the right dates for our extension stamped in our passports. Amazing . . . I truly don't know how they keep track of all the paper!!!

So, I think that brings us current . . . Gracy is doing great - she gives lots of kisses/hugs & she now waves bye-bye & (ok, get out the tissue) she now says "mama"!

When will we return? . . . just as soon as we can!!! I'll keep everyone updated on our return flights!

Love from Islamabad, Pakistan . . .

Take Care . . .
Nancy (Mama), Dalend (Uppa D) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - Pakistan Passport/Visa Extension

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Fri, 04 Feb 2011 02:09:00 +0000

Hello - I hope everyone is safe & warm! We are very homesick, but glad we missed the storm! We have been having 70 degree weather during the day in Islamabad (however, 35 degrees at night!) :)

We have had a somewhat productive week so far.

Monday (31st), Gracy had another doctor's appointment. We picked her up from Edhi Home a little over a week ago now & she was a very sick little baby girl last week & over the weekend. We have found a wonderful child specialist doctor, Dr. Rubina! In the end, MG has 5 different medicines to finally get her on the wellness track! She is doing much, much better this week!

Tuesday (1st) we spent 4 hours at the Ministry of Interior/Directorate General of Passports office waiting for the special Director General's approval for MG's passport. It has taken us 7 business days of waiting & 4 different personal visits to finally get the approval from the Ministry of Interior! We decided on Tuesday that we would go to the DG's office & sit until we had it in hand . . . it worked!

On Wednesday (2nd), we were at the passport office bright & early to begin the process of MG's passport (with the Director General's letter of special approval for a guardian endorsement to be placed on her passport). Our day's number was #145 & we had to wait through 3 different "station/queues", each taking about an hour of wait until #145 was called each time. After 3 hours & wall-to-wall people, we finally had an approved passport application. Now we have to wait 5 days & return on Monday (7th) with an attested (notarized) passport application & we can pick up MG's passport! This is a major move forward! With the passport, we can get the US required medical/physical for MG's immigrant visa & start inching toward the US Embassy side.

On Thursday (3rd), we had visa photos taken of MG.

On Friday (4th), Uppa D & Mama are going to the Pakistan Consulate to extend our visas (just in case). Pakistan will only issue a 1x entry visa for a 30 day duration to US citizens. Since we entered Pakistan on 1/13 our visas will expire on 2/12. For an extension, you have to submit an extension application several days in advance of the expiration date. Since we have time tomorrow, we will go ahead & get that task done. At this point, we don't know if we will need the extension or not, but it is better to have it, just in case.

It is obvious that we will not be returning to the US on Sunday (6th) as planned. We have been majorly delayed due to the extra court hearing for guardianship & new Ministry of Interior requirements of a foreign guardian applying for a Pakistani passport for a minor. We are hoping that we can begin the US immigrant visa process next week. I will give an update on our return flights as soon as I can.

All in all, we are doing fine . . . homesick . . . but fine! We skype with Nicky/G'ma twice a day & that helps! I continue to read my email daily . . . so keep those cards & letters via email coming! . . . it helps us keep connected! Uppa D continues to work at night with his office . . . we have been gone 23 days & counting!

Take care :)
Nancy (Mama), Dalend (Uppa D) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - Gracy's Pakistani Passport

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Fri, 28 Jan 2011 02:13:00 +0000

The last couple of days have been quite eventful . . .

1st of all, Gracy has been very sick with a respiratory infection. Each time we went to visit her at Edhi Home, I could tell she was not feeling well & was running a temperature. Once we finally picked her up on Monday . . . the 1st place we went was to the chemist shop for medicine! Tuesday & Wednesday she continued to run a very high fever . . . so I had the guest house owner (Karim Meghji) help me find a "child specialist" doctor. We finally were able to take her to a doctor on Wed evening. She now is on an antibiotic, fever reducer & cough syrup. She is just now starting to feel better. It has been a rough few days for her!

In the midst of all of that . . . we had to start the process for MG's Pakistani passport. So, on Tuesday morning, we bundled her up & headed out. We had to go to a bank 1st to pay the passport fee (they don't trust the passport office with the fee money) & get a payment receipt. Then we took the receipt, her original NADRA CRC form (Pak child registration form) & original birth certificate, a certified copy of the guardianship order & little "Miss Sweet Pea" herself (she must be physically present) to the passport office. When we finally had our interview, we were told there is a new policy for foreign guardians of children . . . all Pakistani passports for overseas travel must be approved by the Director General of the Passport Office/Ministry of the Interior. So, we had to drive to the main passport office, have another interview with the Asst. Director & make a special application for this new policy approval. The approval was to be reviewed & signed on Wednesday by the DG (Director General). We didn't hear from the Asst Dir on Wed, so today (Thursday) we went to visit him. He told us the DG was not in the office this week & would return on Monday (don't know why he couldn't tell us that when we were there on Tuesday!). So . . . . we have to wait until Monday for the DG's signature on the special approval & hopefully we can get her Pakistani passport by mid next week. We need to visit the US Embassy by late next week to stay on schedule to finish within the duration of our visa (30 days) without having to file for a visa extension.

It's always more like 1/2 to 1 day of business & then several days of wait (everything is a manual process with every document typed on a manual typewriter!) Lots of opportunity for technical automation in this country! ;)

All-in-all, I know . . . It will all work out . . .

Take Care! I'll update again soon.

Nancy (Mama), Dalend (Uppa D) & Gracy

Hello, from Pakistan - Marina Grace

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 02:16:00 +0000

We finally have our sweet Gracy Girl! :)

It has taken a few more days longer than anticipated for the dictation/attestation of the guardianship order by the Pakistani court. My Pakistan attorney finally received a certified copy of the attested guardianship order this morning, 1/24/2011. We were able to go to Edhi Home at 3:00 p.m. today & officially take custody of Marina Grace! Yes, I finally have her!!!

We will begin the Pakistani passport process tomorrow morning. Once I have MG's passport, all the other required documents needed for the USCIS immigrant visa dossier can be completed. We are moving along . . . the last 4 days have been a very long wait!

Right now, Gracy is sleeping like a angel . . .

Nancy (Mama)

Hello, from Pakistan - Final Court Hearing (19th)

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 02:19:00 +0000

This morning Wednesday, 1/19/2011, 9:30 a.m. PST, I was officially granted permanent guardianship of Marina Grace! The Pakistani court hearings are now officially over & it only took 7 court hearings! (4 before I traveled & 3 this last week since we arrived in Pakistan!) The judge will dictate the guardianship order today or tomorrow. Then it will be attested (like our notary). Once we have an attested copy of the order . . . we can go to Edhi Home & pick up Marina Grace (hopefully tomorrow)!

Then, the process for the USCIS IR-4 adoption immigrant visa will begin through the US Embassy/Islamabad.

One step at a time . . .

Nancy (Mama)

Hello, from Pakistan - Edhi Home Visit (16th)

noreply@blogger.com (Nancy) — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 02:22:00 +0000

Sunday, (16th), it was a wonderful, sunny day in Pakistan (about 65 degrees). The excitement of the day was, we were allowed to visit MG at Edhi Home (orphanage), again. We went to the market 1st to get her a treat & spotted Cheerios! We took the Cheerios & a small pink elephant toy with us. We spent about an hour with her. It was amazing . . . She LOVED the Cheerios, but didn't quite know what to do with the toy! However, when the caregiver came in for her. . . she quickly tucked it under her arm as she was passed back to the caregiver (she wasn't about to give it up!). It was a sweet sight to see her so excited! We had tea with the Edhi Home workers before we left.

Then we attended a Christian church (St Thomas Church). It is the same church we attended last year. They have an English service at 11:00 a.m. with many different countries represented. We met several people that remembered us from last year & we remembered them as well (I guess 2 blonde/blue Americans really make an impression)! A couple from Australia, English teachers from Germany, Wales & New Zealand all remembered us. It was a grand reunion over hot milk tea! Of course, we are always conscious of where we are . . . we have to go through security (hand wand) & have all bags inspected before we can enter into the courtyard of the church. A subtle reminder of where we are . . .

We have lost power only 3-4 times so far! If it is during the night, the space heater goes out & it gets rather chilly (it gets down to 30-35 degrees at night)! But, everything is going very well. I think we are finally past the jet lag stage. Dalend has been working about 6 hours a day, so I have been squeezing in my computer time between his naps!

Take Care . . . I'll update again soon!

Nancy (Mama)