It’s taken a while, but I’ve finally managed to transition from the “before times” to living in the midst of the global COVID-19 crisis. Some say we’re now living a “new normal,” an expression which means nothing to me as I never actually figured out what the old “normal” was.

For me, and many others with ADHD, transitions have always been a toughie. And as far as transitions go – this one’s been a doozy.

Add to that, unlike so many others, I’ve been working even more hours than usual throughout this entire pandemic. What I’ve been doing is a story for another day, but let’s just say working on the frontline through a deadly and highly transmissible virus has brought on full-blown anxiety and depressive symptoms, not to mention occasional sheer panic and disrupted sleep.

I’ve tackled those, mostly. Finally – after a mere three months since I posted my announcement that “I’m baaaack…” on PsychCentral.com – here I am posting again. I admit this time lag has felt cringe-worthy and I do apologize. But hey, you know: pandemic.

Getting back to blogging is just one sign I’ve finally transitioned. Social distancing has now become second nature. So second nature in fact, I caught myself doing it while I was in the car. Driving. Alone. Stopped at a red light, I suddenly realized I’d unnecessarily left six feet between my car and the one ahead of me.

They say it takes 60 days to form a new habit. For those of us with ADHD – OK, for me – three or four months seems about right. Either way, through my transition time I’ve developed even more habits to serve as coping skills during the plague.

In Canada, many of us now routinely wear face masks. They’re mostly homemade, from fun, fashion-forward (or backward if, like me, you live in rural Ontario) fabrics. I’ve made such a solid transition to mask-wearing, I actually caught myself driving home after work still donning my favorite floral print.

As soon as I realized this, I took the opportunity to take it off while at a four-way stop.

As the foot patrol officer approached my car, I rolled down the window.

“Nothing wrong,” I quipped cheerily, hoping I wouldn’t get scolded for distracted driving or impeding traffic or some such thing (in rural Canada we often get scolded, and sometimes we even get waved along with a smile, rather than ticketed or worse.)

As I dropped it into the plastic bag I’d brought for the purpose (another new habit) I explained I’d forgotten I was still wearing my mask and just wanted to take it off. I wished the officer a good morning and drove away, mask- (and ticket-) free.

More of a struggle for me (being the impulsive type – yet another of my more pronounced ADHD traits) has been curbing my spontaneous hug-giving. I’ve always been a touchy-feely type who once flagrantly caressed a Rodin sculpture at the Met because it was there. And, you know: sculpture.

Not hugging, for me, has been one of the biggest sacrifices of the pandemic. Fortunately, as mentioned, I’ve mastered social distancing. Even more fortunate – my arms are not six feet long. Therefore, I can now stop myself mid-way when crossing the social distance to hug a friend or even a co-worker (hey, I never said I had mastered appropriate hugging; I’m still a work-in-progress). Realizing what I’m about to do is verboten, I often find myself backing up while uttering an embarrassed apology.

Embarrassed apologies: having not been diagnosed with ADHD until age 47, that’s a skill I mastered long ago.

ADHD women: don’t think of it as a global pandemic; think of it as a fleeting opportunity to be in the majority.

Consider this: now no one’s sure of what day it is! We’re not alone anymore.

This morning I looked at my toenails after my shower and sarcastically thought, “guess it’s time for my mani and pedi.” I chuckled to myself. Out loud. One does that when one lives with a cat, plants, and ADHD.

And then it dawned on me. No one is getting manicures and pedicures these days. I’m not alone anymore!

Yesterday, I noticed several co-workers with dishevelled, longer-than-usual hair; many were just not as “put together” as they used to be. As a disorganized, time-management challenged woman with ADHD – this is my usual state of affairs. Having spent 47 years pre-diagnosis – many of them without the benefit of a non-ADHD parent or other capable adult to dress and groom me appropriately for school, social gatherings or the board room – I now appreciate the fact that I am no longer the most unkempt person in the room. Fitting in by default might not be call for celebration, but hey, I’ll take my victories where I can get them.

Similarly, the peculiar moods, meltdowns and melancholy of most these days let me know it’s not just me and other members of the tribe who experience the full range of human emotions on a daily basis – sometimes within the same hour. Mood swings have become de rigueur as everyone unleashes their inner drama queen in grand style.

I’m not alone anymore. And neither are you.

Legions of self-isolators are sitting at home in their sweats or pajamas at all times of day. Sound familiar? Even as I type this, I’m thinking of loosening off the drawstring on my black sweatpants because I’ve gained at least five pounds from living on nothing but chocolate and chips for the last three weeks. Granted, that’s not unusual for me. But now I’m not alone anymore.

And if you’re a woman – especially if you’re also a highly sensitive person – this pandemic has proffered some unexpected perks. Do you realize how ahead of the curve we HSP women are? (Not that one, unfortunately.)

Take, for example, my perennial pet peeve of having to wear a brassiere to work to be deemed socially acceptable. For a quintessential “princess and the pea” type – you know, those of us who cannot abide tags, itchy fabrics and the like – I have made an amazing discovery amidst the throes of this pandemic – at least amongst my North American, bra-wearing, non-ADHD friends.

The genesis of my discovery occurred as I drove home from work last week (I’m now an “essential” worker, but more about that in a future post). As I drove, I realized my chest felt so tight I couldn’t get a deep breath. Panic began setting in – until I remembered I was wearing a sports bra.

When I shared this story with a friend, she laughed.

“I can’t believe you were wearing a bra,” she said (my friends know me really well).

In her state of self-isolation, she confessed she no longer wore one either.

So did another friend. And another.

Where legions of feminists and decades of protests have failed, a global pandemic has suddenly – and unexpectedly – liberated us, en masse, from our underwire.

Now, if we could only do something about those pesky masks.

I’m Back!

Forgive me readers; it’s been five years since I last posted.

Of course, in ADHD time, that’s roughly 150 years – at least that’s how it feels.

Over that time, I’ve been working full-time as an editor and multi-media journalist for a local newspaper. After I left the paper, I spent about a year meandering on the side-trails of life (read: recovering from debilitating burnout).

I’m glad I’ve finally found my way back to the main trail – and just in time to celebrate Psych Central’s 25th anniversary, no less. It feels kind of exciting and auspicious to be making a comeback now, so I’m also celebrating the kismet of that.

Today, I’m back to freelancing, finishing my third book, and of course, re-launching ADHD from A to Zoë.

Because – guess what?

I still have ADHD.

To my new readers: welcome! I’m glad you’ve “discovered” my blog.

I hope you’re as enthusiastic as the kid who comes home from school saying, “Mom, you’ve got to listen to this sick band!” – only to share a download of Zeppelin’s “Kashmir.”

If you’re back to pick up where we left off – like Robert Plant, you’re going to find I’ve seasoned since we last saw each other. I’m older. And, hopefully, wiser. And definitely have some new stories to share. I can’t wait to share them with you!

For readers new and past, here’s a brief (re)introduction:

I was diagnosed with ADHD at 47.

Not knowing anything about it, I was pretty sure that it made me a six-year-old boy bouncing off the walls.

Except I wasn’t.

That was the stereotype of those with the diagnosis at the time. The idea of girls – much less an adult woman having ADHD – was still but a glint in a psychiatrist’s eye. Today we recognize that ADHD shows up in about a fifty-fifty split between the sexes.

As I started to learn, the fledgling information available told me girls with the disorder were mainly the “dreamy, inattentive” sub-type.

Damn. After a lifetime of ADHD pratfalls and pitfalls, I couldn’t even get ADHD “right” (or so I thought). While I could get distracted with the best of them, hyperactivity was the hallmark of my flavor of ADHD, not dreaminess.

I looked for a book that reflected my life experiences. I couldn’t find one.

So I wrote it.

In 2013, ADHD According to Zoë was published, a memoir chronicling much of what I’d learned as a late-diagnosed woman with ADHD.

Prior to the book’s release, in 2010 I started writing this blog, ADHD from A to Zoë. No way was I going to go through this journey alone! It was such a relief to meet others like me: readers who have been so generous in sharing their own insights and challenges by commenting on the many topics covered so far.

And so we have come full circle.

For those of you who are new to this blog – or who would like a refresher – here are a few recommended posts to get you started:

• ADHD Diagnostic Quiz for Women
• 10 Signs That You’re An HSP (Highly Sensitive Person)
• ADHD – The Immigrant Experience

Don’t forget to check out the extensive archives, where I explore topics like ADHD treatment, the pros and cons of  “coming out” at work; time management; ADHD coaching; social awkwardness and so much more!

What’s new is I can now share experiences from the perspective of an older woman with ADHD. For example, as a late-blooming bass player, I’ve discovered there’s a world of difference between “aging rocker” and “off your rocker.”

I’m still learning about the non-ADHD majority so I can interact successfully out there in the big world without tripping over my feet (or tongue) when communicating with those who are not in the tribe.

I’m inviting you to come along for the ride, learning with me and sharing your own experience, tips, and workarounds.

I promise I’ll do my best to respond to your comments when appropriate (time allowing).

And remember: you’re not alone. You never were. Together, we can keep reminding each other that while our ADHD minds might put us in the minority, it doesn’t make us wrong, just different. Sure, some of our traits challenge us and, let’s face it – others, but some are akin to superpowers. Or can be turned into superpowers with a bit of tweaking! The trick is learning which is which; embracing and enhancing the things that work for us, and learning to manage, compensate for or minimize the stuff that trips us up.

Sound good?

Then I’ll see you again soon.

Can’t wait to explore and continue the journey with you, my ADHD tribe.

Onward!

Some have relationship success, but struggle when it comes to meeting deadlines, getting organized, and arriving at work on time.

Who says you can’t have it all?

Me? I consider myself a “generalist.” That is, by the time I was diagnosed, I’d pretty much covered all the bases: my relationships sucked; I’d been fired from more than one job; my financial life was in ruins; and my adoptive family thought I was weird and unfathomable.

On the bright side, when it came to writing ADHD According to Zoë, I could speak with authority and insight about how ADHD manifests in each area of life. I’ve been there.

That’s why I decided to share some strategies this month in two webinars. In the first, I offer suggestions about how to tackle ADHD in seven key areas, going right back to the diagnosis itself. Being diagnosed as an adult is a big deal. Our whole world turns upside down, and the first challenge is to integrate our new knowledge of ADHD into our self-understanding.

If you weren’t able to attend the webinar, you can watch the replay video here:

I ended with a challenge for the webinar attendees to pick one or two strategies from a handout and take them for a test-drive until we meet again on October 26 for our follow-up session, ADHD Awareness Month: Strategies That Work. (If you’d like to join us, there’s still time to register:  ADHD Awareness Month: Strategies That Work).

If you’d like to check out the exercises and strategies in the handout, you can download them here:

ADHD Awareness: 7 Keys to Unlocking Your ADHD Potential – Handout pdf

The assignments aren’t hard! They’re designed to help you triage what area of your life you’d like to work on, and to help you reach your goals. Just pick one or two, and give ‘em a whirl.

Practice might not make perfect – but it definitely can make our lives better.

What I’m aware of this month

For me, I’m aware that over the past few weeks it’s been important for me to say “no.” Not an easy thing for an easily overwhelmed person who’s all too quick to impulsively say “yes” whenever she’s asked to take an extra shift at work, to go out when she’s feeling under the weather or exhausted, or any number of things that add to an already over-crowded day timer.

It still takes a conscious effort, and sometimes I say a qualified “yes” then cancel later, knowing that I should have said “no” in the first place, but it’s become much easier over the years since my diagnosis. But the first step was gaining awareness of how those of us with ADHD become overwhelmed.

I’ve learned to save myself from the guilt I felt for decades.

I’ve learned to save myself from the guilt I felt for decades (before my ADHD diagnosis) when I’d have to back out of plans, or arrived late because I was trying to squeeze too much into my day, or when (even worse) I double-booked or even forgot an event.

Join us!

So – what are you doing during ADHD Awareness Month to raise your awareness about ADHD, and especially about YOUR ADHD?

I’d like to encourage you to take the time, pick an activity (even if it’s just consciously saying “no” when you otherwise might have ill-advisedly said “yes”) raise your ADHD awareness, and come back and share with us Monday night.

I’m looking forward to seeing you there. Good luck!

I’ve been thinking about what “ADHD awareness” means to me. And the short answer is: everything.

My own diagnosis was about a decade ago, and at first, the learning curve was steep. In fact, I had to jump off my bike and walk after the first year or two just to make it up the hill. I’m not saying I’ve arrived, but I’ve come a long way and (mostly) I’ve enjoyed the journey.

Thinking back on those first tentative steps, new insights came almost daily. I read everything ADHD-related I could get my hands on. I talked to others with ADHD. I interviewed experts. I did everything I could to learn. But most importantly, I researched myself.

I finally had the key to understanding why I had “lost” so many jobs. (I didn’t actually “lose” them; I know exactly where they went: to other people).

I finally had the key to understanding why my family relationships had been so difficult.

I finally knew why I’d messed up friendships, and why I couldn’t stand the volume in a movie theater while others didn’t seem to notice.

My ADHD is different than yours. And yours is different from others’.

The insights came fast and furious. It was a personal journey, tailor-made for me. My ADHD is different than yours. And yours is different from others’. And that’s the most important part of ADHD awareness: being aware of what your ADHD looks like.

It’s only by identifying which ADHD traits trip us up that we can begin to find solutions or work-arounds. What works for me, might not work for you.

But where do you begin in this journey of self-discovery?

Well, there’s no better time than ADHD Awareness Month!

So here’s the deal: I want to help.

I’m offering two free webinars, hosted by PsychCentral, in which we’ll discover how you can become more aware of what’s most critical to you. You’ll learn to identify the top ADHD bugaboos you need to battle, and how to slay your own personal ADHD dragon.

We’ll start with a session on the 7 key areas to look at, and I’ll give you some tips and strategies to try for a couple of weeks. Some will work, some won’t. And you’ll probably come up with, or enhance, some of your own.

Then we’ll regroup at a second webinar at the end of the month and share what we’ve learned. Together, we’ll send you on your way with enhanced ADHD awareness. Awareness that’s tailored to you so that you can go forward with a greater understanding, and greater skill at living – happily – with ADHD.

I hope you’ll join us!

To register for the first of two ADHD Awareness Month webinars, click here:  ADHD Awareness: The 7 Keys to Unlocking Your ADHD Potential

If I had to list my relationship with time on Facebook, I’d have to choose, “It’s complicated.”

Shortly after my late-in-life diagnosis, I learned my ADHD brain was to blame. Sure, it was great to be absolved of time-management guilt, but I was pretty sure the rest of the world would still expect me to arrive on time, ADHD or not, so I poured over ADHD books seeking time-management tips.

I started using a paper planner right away, and still rely on one. I didn’t even have a smartphone when I was first diagnosed, about nine years ago.

It took about three years to adopt the kitchen-timer strategy. At first, I resisted. I mean, what full-grown adult relies on a kitchen timer to run their life? What was I, a Christmas turkey? It just seemed kind of weird. Then again, so did having ADHD.

I was hoping my ADHD treatment would help me to feel less, not more, like a turkey.

Finally, I caved and shelled out the two bucks at the local dollar store to pick up a timer. (Technically, it should have cost a dollar, right?)  Now I use that baby all the time. Sometimes, even when I’m cooking. It keeps me from hyperfocusing when I don’t want to, and adds the adrenaline rush I need, kind of like playing “beat the clock” to get things finished and move on.

In “Not Dressed Up with Somewhere to Go,” my chapter on time management in ADHD According to Zoë, (which took forever to write) I wrote:

“By taking a moment to think it through before acting, I can often restrain myself from trying to squeeze one more thing in before leaving for work.”

When I’m trying to stay on track I try to be mindful (aware) of the moment by asking myself, Is this what I’m supposed to be doing right now? Or, Is this what I want to be doing right now? The word no comes up a lot here too. I use it to get me back on track.

I also try to catch myself when I’m saying “yes” when I should be saying “no” to an activity or commitment that I don’t have time for. This can help me say no the next time.

I stopped my formal quest for time-management tools a few years ago, but recently caught myself using some tricks I hadn’t been aware I’d been using.

Parking meters

Last week, I found myself standing in front of a parking meter trying to calculate how long I’d be at the library doing research. The prospect of losing money, even by paying an extra quarter or two; or, worse, not putting enough money in the meter and getting a parking ticket, is a great way of motivating me.

The goal was to get back to my car with only a minute or two left on the meter. I was suddenly conscious that over the years, I’d gotten into the habit of periodically testing how well I was able to measure time by using the parking meter in this way.

If I lucked out and found a meter with time left on it, it added a whole new dimension. Then, I’d ask myself: Is it enough time for my task? Is it more than enough? How much more? What task can I add to take advantage of the time I found left on the meter?

Clearly, this second parking meter scenario was helpful in addressing not just time-related issues, but an additional ADHD challenge: money management. I could manage my time and save quarters. Bonus.

Smartphone

I have no idea how other people use their smartphones to keep on track. I’ve heard something about schedules and calendars and apps and such, but I’m still not that tech-savvy.

I did, however, discover the big clock icon a few months ago. I tapped it.

I’m now making regular use of the stopwatch (for example, to time my bike ride from home to work so I know how long it takes and can leave in time to be on time).

And I use the alarm, which I set for a few hours at work so I don’t hyperfocus and work a seven-hour shift when I was supposed to work for four. I even leave a 5- or 10-minute transition time to finish up what I’m working on and get to my break.

Last week, I noticed the “world time” icon. I tapped “Add city.” Big mistake. Did I really need to know what time it was in Kazakhstan while I was taking my break? Before long, I had three other cities selected, and started confusing myself. Thus ended that little experiment (it’s 7:14 a.m. in Kazakhstan, tomorrow, as I write this, btw).

Overall, I’m doing pretty well with the time management thing, Kazakhstan aside.

What are some of the strategies that work for you? Do you have the time to share with us?

Are you sure?

I’ve been thinking since my last post about the issue of ADHD and ADHD look-alikes. I’ve written about them before, but found myself taken by surprise at recent events in my life.

For example, ADHD and depression often go together. While I’ve never been diagnosed with clinical depression, I know plenty who have been, including those who are doubly endowed with both.

Yet for the past year I’ve been experiencing what might be categorized as clinical depression. Maybe. I’m not sure. I’m not sure, because I’m no expert in depression. But – I’ve been feeling like nothing matters; I’d lost interest in many things that used to give me pleasure; and I was constantly tired or even exhausted by around three in the afternoon on a daily basis.

If it walks like a duck?

Although I’m no expert in depression, I had the intuition that this was not the kind of duck I’ve heard about in those who have been diagnosed (with or without ADHD). When I found out recently from blood tests that my thyroid is very close to qualifying as hypothyroid, I took a quick look at a reputable site online to check out the symptoms. I followed up with a call to my medical practitioner.

Lo and behold, depression, fatigue, and inability to lose weight are all symptoms. And all had been plaguing me for the past year.

Meanwhile, I’d been off my ADHD medication during that same year, feeling very foggy-headed. And couldn’t these symptoms all be signs of aging? Sorting out what was going on was not easy.

One concerned person asked if I might be suffering from a sleep disorder, as sleep disorders and ADHD often go together too.

Again, I’ve only rarely had trouble with sleep, and it didn’t last long. But I do know that, like depression, ADHD and sleep disorders often go hand in hand. Many people with ADHD are naturally night owls, but I’ve always been a morning person (why I had to take up astronomy is beyond me, and a topic for another blog post).

I’ve explored the old label bugaboo in the past. I still maintain that unless we have a label for something, how can we begin to know what an effective approach or treatment is?

Yet with so many things mimicking or sharing traits with ADHD, it can get complicated. Why didn’t I seek help sooner?

I’m not even sure I would have known where to begin. It was only because I went for my annual physical (which followed my previous one, a mere four years earlier because I forgot. Now that’s classic ADHD…) that I discovered the whole wonky thyroid thing.

I’m glad my blood tests showed up something that seems to explain my past year’s symptoms. With follow-up, we’ll see if my symptoms can be resolved or at least managed.

Because somewhere underneath all this tiredness, weight gain, and depression – there’s an über-active, irrationally optimistic, and wildly-excited-about-life ADHD girl waiting to be unleashed upon the world! …again…

Read about more ADHD Look-alikes:

• ADHD and The Highly Sensitive Person
• PMS, ADHD and Me
• For ADHD, We’ve Come a Long Way, Baby!

Hamish Irvine via Compfight

“Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. My last confession was…”

I’m not Catholic, but that whole confession thing speaks to me right now. Let’s try it like this:

Forgive me, Dear Readers, for I have sinned neglected my blog. My last confession post was two months, three weeks, and two days ago and these are my sins issues:

• I’ve been binge-watching Coronation Street and reading novels until the wee hours of the morning
• I’ve caved to my Facebook addiction until I was so sick of cats knocking stuff off shelves I wanted to kill somebody
• I’ve stopped meditating, playing bass, and doing yoga
• I haven’t followed through on a zillion ideas and have forgotten what most of them were
• I completely forgot my mission-critical goals and projects
• I’ve become depressed and despondent

I am truly sorry I lost myself in a black hole. I have no idea where I’ve been.

There is no Priest to forgive me. No ADHD coach to absolve me of my descent into ADHD hell. I had to rescue myself. And here’s what I discovered:

• I didn’t meditate, do yoga, or practice bass because I had no privacy
• Without daily privacy I’m an irritable, nervous, crazy person who sits in her room eating chips and watching British soaps
• I need to fill my emotional and spiritual well on a regular basis or I’ll fall into an empty well
• Being unproductive, for me, is depressing, disorienting, and self-esteem crushing

When I finally realized that I hadn’t been doing the things I needed to do to manage my ADHD and mood, I made changes. My boarder (who was home 24/7) moved out and I regained my privacy.

This helped.

But the truth is, my entire last year is mostly a blur (my loyal readers will recall that I went off my ADHD medication back in March 2014).

I was shocked when I realized I’d been off my medication for over a year. Hadn’t it been only a few months?

A trip to my family doctor and the decision was made.

In May, I went back on my medication. Instantly, it felt like a fog had lifted.

When I told my ADHD friend that I’d felt like I’d spent the past year in a fog, he said, “That sounds awful.”

I don’t see it that way. Losing the first 47 years, now that was awful. But so much has changed for the positive.

Off meds, I discovered that I’d learned a lot since my late-in-life diagnosis at 47. I was no longer as verbally impulsive; my friendships and part-time work remained stable. But moving my main life and work goals forward had been a Sisyphean task.

Still, even three weeks back on my meds, I’m dragging my butt. I’ve started to become more productive again, but I’m still exhausted. Today I learned the possible reason: a wonky thyroid. Perhaps it’s not just the ADHD that’s been holding me back over the past year.

Imagine that.

Not being a mother myself, it was a bit of a leap to put myself in her shoes. As a young adult, I’d had to focus on dealing with an oversize heap of emotional baggage of my own via a hit parade of assorted therapists. Psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers and rebirthers – all had taken a crack over the years at cracking open the leftover feelings of rage and resentment I had from my childhood experiences.

Aside from realizing that my mom’s own parenting must have been less-than-perfect, I’d never understood how challenging raising a child like me must have been. On a subconscious level, I must have had an inkling, as I often quipped, “Thank God I never had a child like me to raise.”  Still, it wasn’t until I understood ADHD that I began to understand how truly difficult it must have been– especially when my family knew nothing of ADHD as I was growing up.

This realization added a substantial amount of guilt and regret to the post-ADHD-diagnosis emotional train wreck. Although I couldn’t have done any better, none of us could, I temporarily felt huge regret at having been such a handful as a child.

This is one of the reasons reading Dr. Rita Eichenstein’s recently published book, Not What I Expected: Hope and Help for Parents of Atypical Children, was such a bittersweet experience. If I could have a life do-over, I’d want my mom to have a copy of Dr. Eichenstein’s book.

As an adoptee, I grew up well aware that I was definitely not the little girl my mom had expected. I was quite different from the rest of my adoptive family, in appearance, mannerisms, abilities and so on. Being the only one in the family with ADHD set me apart even further. My adoptive mom was ill-equipped to deal with the whirling, hyperactive dervish of a daughter that was me.

Eichenstein speaks to parents of kids with ADHD, learning disabilities, autism, anxiety, giftedness, and a wide array of differences which lead to raising an “atypical” child. I can’t help but think that Eichenstein’s book would have gone far to alleviate my mom’s challenges by reassuring and validating her in her quest to be the best parent she could be.

It is too late for me and my mom (she passed away when I was 26, long before my ADHD diagnosis), but I would urge any parent who is struggling with a special needs child to pick up Not What I Expected. You’ll be encouraged to savor the rewards, and sustained to withstand the challenges, in dealing with your surprising, unexpected child.

To learn more about how to take care of yourself while parenting a special needs child, please join me Monday, April 27, as I host a free Psych Central webinar with my very special guest, Dr. Rita Eichenstein, pediatric neuropsychologist.

Register for the webinar here.

At ten in the morning, my first morning call;
I chatted as per usual, not suspecting at all.
When out in the front room there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.

As I stood up, my head it started to ring;
To my dread and my horror, it could be only one thing!
The cat was all nestled, snug in her chair;
She (being quite deaf) still slept without care.

But I couldn’t ignore
The sight of my tree,
Oh, perfect, I thought;
It’s like ADHD.

I stared there in shock as the thoughts tumbled in:
The floor soaking wet, the water sinking in.
Save all the presents! I thought with alarm,
And ran for a towel to lessen the harm.

Grace under pressure, I stayed on the phone;
Sopped up the water and cleaned up my home.
As I multi-tasked in true ADHD style,
I finished my call with a bewildered smile.

Now vacuum! Now sweep!
Drag the tree down the hall!
Clean up every shattered
Ornament and ball!

As dry needles
Out my backdoor they flew,
With four days ‘til Christmas,
What the hell would I do?

The stump of a cigarette
I held in my teeth
The smoke it encircled
My head like a wreath.

I sat chubby and plump, my miserable self
(I just joined the Y to rehabilitate myself).
Back in the house, made a cup of hot tea
I know what I’ll do! I’ll go to plan B.

I sprang to my kitchen
And picked up a plant;
Rearranged all the gifts,
Though the result was quite scant.

My friends they were due
To arrive in four days,
To eat Christmas dinner,
And music to play.

The spirit of Christmas
Would greet them with no tree,
But I knew with assurance,
They were there to see me.

As I ponder with wonder
My pre-Christmas plight,
I think What can go wrong, will,
But we’ll have a good night.

Happy ADHD Christmas everyone!

P.S. – A Christmas miracle: only ONE ornament broke!